Ep 282 | Drama Dies Without An Audience

Thank you for joining me today. It's Brian Gubernick, and welcome to the No Days Off podcast, where we believe that every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. Let's get into today's topic. Today I want to talk about drama. Now, I'm going to assume if you've been on this planet for a little while, if you are a business person, if you're an entrepreneur like most of the No Days Off Nation, then my guess is that you've experienced drama. You've experienced drama in the office, on your team, in a social group, within your family. We just see this stuff come up. It comes up a lot. My guess is that when you you experience or you observe this drama within your organization or your team, it really doesn't serve the cause. It probably is not creating positive energy. It's probably even creating massive distraction and maybe even, uh, some, some challenge or a combative environment or just Things that don't again, push you towards the goal versus holding you back from achieving the goal. What can we do about this? What should we do about this? There's all sorts of tactical steps you can take to limit or even eliminate drama within your team, within your company, within your, within your family or your social group. But I'll tell you what. Some of the best advice I received around this was pretty darn simple. And it came from my friend and business partner, Ben. And many of you listening to the No Days Off podcast, you know, the metrics and business I'm in there in place. And Ben Kinney is my partner in these things. And Ben's got a few solid words of wisdom from time to time. And about a month ago, I heard him talk about drama. And you know what he said? He said, you know, when it comes to drama, drama dies without an audience. Drama dies without an audience. I've since repeated that in a different way. I've said drama dies or ceases to exist without a voice. Same concept. I want you to think about that statement. Drama dies without an audience. And I mentioned earlier, and a lot of times in our episodes, I'll go through very tactical steps. I'll go through different lists of things we can do or should consider. And I could do that when it comes to tackling drama, but I'll tell you what, if you honor or observe that one statement, drama dies without an audience, you really contemplate or think around that. You realize that that one statement, that one tactic, is all you need to know. When we think about drama dying without an audience, what we're really saying is that drama relies on attention and it relies on a reaction in order to sustain itself and even build. Without people to witness or engage with or perpetuate it, drama really loses its power and eventually fades away. That statement, drama dies without an audience, it implies a handful of things. Again, it implies an attention dependency. Drama thrives on attention. When individuals refuse to engage in drama or react to it, they deprive it of the audience that it needs to actually persist. The statement also has to do with social reinforcement. Drama usually spreads. And again, you probably have firsthand experience in this. Drama oftentimes spreads and intensifies when it receives reactions and, and validation from an audience, from others. Without this audience to reinforce it, it loses— drama will lose its momentum. How about gossip and rumors? Much of drama's potency comes from the spreading of the drama through conversations and through gossip. So when people choose not to participate in this gossip or in spreading rumors, drama really loses its channels of dissemination. Like there's no way for it to spread. Lastly, when I think around drama having an audience or drama dying without an audience, I think about positive environments or cultivating a positive environment. Fostering a culture of positivity, of respect or mutual respect and constructive communication discourages— can discourage drama because it promotes healthier ways of interacting. So in essence, Drama Dies Without an Audience really underscores the importance of individual choice. Our choice to refuse to participate in drama and refuse to create an environment that would be conducive to drama thriving. And therefore it in fact dies. I recognize this. I see it show up quite often. And now that I'm mentioning it here today, you will too. I was thinking about it today because my daughter came home from, from dance. And if you listen to the podcast, you know, I'm a dance dad, right? She comes home and she's telling me like class was not as fun today because there was just constant noise, constant drama in the class. Girls that were complaining about this or complaining about that, or they're tired or whatever. And I had explained to her, I said, Katie, drama, all that stuff goes away when you don't give it an audience, when you don't give it a voice. In other words, when you hear that noise, choose to not respond, choose to not deal with it, choose to not engage. And when you don't engage, there's no gasoline for that flame. And what happens to that flame once it burns at the end of the wick? It just dies out. Think about this today, because you will absolutely come up with drama. Maybe it's not just within your company or social circle or just a group in general, maybe it's just drama in a transaction or drama in some sort of project, or, you know, again, maybe it's drama tied to a strategy or tactic of yours where you feel like a need to respond or a need to react. And a byproduct of that may be creating a more dramatic environment. I want you to check yourself for a moment. And recognize if I don't feed this inner desire to create this noise, because I don't give it an audience, it will in fact die out. And usually, if not 100% of the time, when you look back on a scenario in hindsight, you recognize that, hey, I'm really glad I didn't create that noise or create that drama, or I didn't respond to that drama and noise. You're usually happier about that decision. Maybe better said, Rarely do you look back on a scenario and say, gosh, I'm really glad I, I supported that or engaged with that drama. It's not usually something said. So the focusing question for you, where does this concept of drama dying without an audience or drama dying without a voice, where does it apply to your world today? How can you spread this message? How can you teach it to others? I think we could all agree. You know, a business environment, a social circle, a family absent drama is likely a happier, better, more efficient, and thriving one. That's all I have for you today. The No Days Off Podcast. Thank you so much for listening. And remember, every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. So let's get after it.