Ep 414 | What it's Like to Meet the Person You Could Have Become

Thank you for joining me today. It's Brian Gubernick, and welcome to the No Days Off podcast, where we believe that every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. I've talked about Ed Mylett on this podcast of ours, uh, before. I, I really, really am a big fan of Ed Mylett. If you don't know him, Uh, he is a huge, uh, podcaster, entrepreneur, really bright guy. And I just, I just really like a number of things that he puts out, uh, content-wise. And I also think he's an amazing interviewer. So anytime you get a chance to listen to one of his interviews, uh, not only do you learn from his guests, but just listening to him, he's, he's pretty spectacular. Anyhow, about, uh, I don't know, it's all probably almost 2 years ago, maybe a year and a half ago, I had the opportunity to see Ed Mylett present in person, and I really enjoyed his presentation. The guy was phenomenally dynamic, and people were hanging on his every word. In that speech that Ed was giving that day, he described something that's— that really resonated with me, and it's kind of stuck with me ever since I heard him talk around it. It was this concept that, uh, around hell, believe it or not. And the idea is that hell is the experience— his version of hell would be the experience of facing the ideal version of yourself, the person that, that you could have become had you reached your potential. That was a pretty powerful story when he told it, and I'm going to tell it here in a moment. But again, the idea of not living up to your potential for him was so strong that he described it as a personal hell, seeing that gap between the person you became and the person you could have actually become. The way, uh, I would tell this story, and I kind of wrote it out so I, so I can speak it clearly and make sure I don't, don't mess this up, but, but I'm gonna, I'm gonna kind of read something that, that I put together off of what Ed Mylett had taught, and I want to share it now. Imagine that at the end of your life, you're standing in this vast, quiet room. You feel a sense of both relief and anticipation as you reflect on the journey that you've had. Then a figure appears in the distance, a person who feels familiar but whom you don't immediately recognize. As that person draws closer, you realize with a strange twist of, of recognition and discomfort that this person is you, but not the you who lived your life as you did. This person standing before you is the ideal version of yourself. They're the, the you who lived out every bit of potential you had. Who made every choice, who pushed every limit and pursued every opportunity that was available. They're a reflection of everything you could have been if you'd pursued your dreams with full commitment, faced every fear, and given life your all. In this moment, you feel the full weight of meeting them. Every small choice you made, every dream you delayed, every fear that held you back now stands starkly in contrast to this ideal self. The gap between who you are and who you could have become becomes undeniable, and it feels like a kind of hell because you see the life, the potential, and the impact you missed. But instead of despair, there's something else— a lesson, a kind of relief that you now recognize. Had you known what it would feel like to meet this person Maybe you would have lived differently. Maybe you would have strived for more. Maybe you would have given more. And in that instant, you understand the importance of your choices and actions in life, of striving to become the person you can be. So I tell that story. Maybe you ought to go back and listen to it one more time. It's not usually my style to read a story like that, uh, but I think it, I think it should strike many of our listeners here today around their current reality in comparison to where they intend or dream to go, and that there's a gap between who you are at this moment and who you could potentially become. But not all of us sees the day thinking that reaching my potential is the objective and anything short of that, as Ed Mylett would call it, might be a piece of, you know, a portion of hell. It's a pretty extreme thought, I get it. But the point here is, much like yesterday's episode about the pain cave, we get to make a choice, right? Like we get to choose how we're going to be in the future. Our choices today will affect our future selves. We should be asking questions like, am I taking actions today that bring me closer to my best self? Like the pain cave we talked about yesterday in endurance sports, as that could prompt us to face challenges more purposefully, making choices that align with our highest potential so, so that we don't reach the end with regrets. Is very, very similar. If you ask yourself each and every day, maybe at the beginning of the day or maybe at the conclusion of the day, am I taking actions today or did I take actions today, depending on the time you ask it, that brought me closer or bring me closer to my best self? How might that shape the choices that you make? How might that change the way you manage your calendar? How about the way you approach certain relationships or how you lead people or how you just build your business or build your life? For me, this is something I've been thinking about a little bit more, because I'll be honest, I don't ask myself, am I taking actions today that bring me closer to my best self? I ask a number of questions, but I don't think I ask one that directly. And I think I'm going to start doing it more often. And aligning the steps I'm taking, or at least attempt to align the steps I'm taking each day, the choices I make each day, to what I perceive to be the best version of me. See, I don't know if I'm ever going to, or if you're ever going to, match the exact person that you have the potential to become. But the more I can close the gap, the closer I can get to that, I'm going to guess the happier I'll, I'll be. The the more fulfilling life I'll lead. There was a guy in my world, business world, not the pivot, but speaking of potential, we're gonna wrap up with this. There was a guy I used to do business with, and I'll never forget, he said one time to me, he said, "Brian, let me ask you a question. When a coach at the end of the game is getting interviewed," any sport, "when that coach is being interviewed at the end of the game, and that coach," mentions the word or uses the word potential in his statements to the, to the, the guy interviewing him or the girl interviewing him, did that team, did that coach's team win or lose that day? If that coach mentions the word potential, did that team win or lose that day? And there's a funny thing, I mean, it's a funny thought of his, but the reality is my, you know, I, I think when I, I watch a lot of sports, the coach starts saying something about potential It's because his team just lost or her team just lost. And the point this individual is making to me is if we're reflecting on where we could be or where we could, how we could eventually get there one day, then maybe we're already losing. In other words, when we all get to the end of our life and you start talking around, man, I wish I could have fulfilled my potential. I think that's going to be a disappointing thought. But if said differently, I achieved all my goals, I became the person I wanted to become, I made choices that aligned with where I wanted to go. Again, I think you've probably lived a pretty fulfilling life. So on that note, the focusing question for you today is the same one I've asked a few times now: am I taking actions today that bring me closer to my best self? I want you to ask that of yourself right now and align your day, your actions accordingly. That's all I have for you today. The No Days Off Podcast. Thank you so much for listening. And remember, every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. So let's get after it.