Ep 671 | How One Run in New York Changed the Way I Think About Limits

Thank you for joining me today. It's Brian Gubernick, and welcome to the No Days Off podcast, where we believe that every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. This past weekend, uh, actually Thursday night through Sunday, I was in New York City with, with my daughter Katie. We went for her 13th birthday. She actually turned 13 a couple months ago, but because of her dance schedule and my work schedule, we decided to delay until this past week when she had her fall break from school. And of course, you know, I asked her where she wants to go and she says, "I want to go to New York City." And so, for those that know me, I live in Arizona, so quite the trip. But of course, well worth it, especially to go celebrate my kid's 13th. So, we had the New York City, and like I always try to do when I go to New York, I try to go out and run in Central Park. I just, I really love Central Park. I love all that's going on there. I'm a big fan of the city, at least visiting the city. And when you get out in Central Park, if you've been out there, as many of you probably have, there are thousands of people out there. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people running, especially on Friday, Saturday, Sunday. And they're, they're moving together, and there's this steady, almost kind of beautiful rhythm of runners. And if you enjoy the park, if you enjoy the city, and you like running, it is kind of a runner's paradise, at least in my opinion. Now, I've always thought about myself as a, a 9-minute miler. It takes me 9 minutes in most races. That's, that's the pace at which I run. That's a, that's a pretty steady, consistent 4-hour marathon sort of pace. That's how I've believed my, myself to be in terms of my running. That's my pace, that's my identity. Now stick with me, this isn't all about running, but you'll understand here in a moment. However, on Friday, you know, the first day I was out running, something happened that really changed the way I think about performance. So I start running on Friday and I'm listening to a podcast and, and I completely zoned out, which is not an uncommon thing, but I happen to completely zone out and I wasn't checking my watch and I'm not tracking my splits and I'm not really thinking about pace. Remember, I'm a 9-minute guy, I'm a 4-hour marathon guy. Well, I'm running with this flow of individuals, again, hundreds if not thousands out there over the course of the the, the park, and I was doing about an 8-mile run, which is basically the circumference of the park, working, working up and down the park. And about 40 minutes in, I glanced down at my watch and I realized that I've already covered 5 miles. So in other words, if you could do the math, that means I was running an 8-minute pace. I was running an entire minute per mile faster than what I had believed was my standard time. Now, for those that run, you, you get the significance of that. 1 minute is massive. Like, it is, it's a lot. If you're not a runner, take my word for it, 1 minute's a pretty sizable drop. I mean, it's in a marathon that basically is a half hour, right? And I was running an entire minute per mile faster than how I describe myself, my identity, my 9-minute pace. But here's the thing, it didn't feel dramatically harder. I didn't notice it. I mean, my heart rate was up a slight bit when I went back and looked at the data, and my breathing was probably a little heavier, but I didn't feel like I was struggling or suffering. I just wasn't thinking about the limit as I normally do, right? Like, I usually am looking at the watch saying, 9 minutes, my pace. 9 minutes is my pace. I've been running inside a story of sorts. I'm a 9-minute guy, and that story had, had become my, my governor. That was the realization. What do I mean when I say governor? Every car has a governor, a limiter that, that, that caps the car's top speed in order to protect its engine. You know, if you've ever driven a golf cart, you know, you know, that golf cart gets going, but it caps. That's a governor. Well, we all have governors as well. We have mental governors. These are the beliefs, the identities, the self-definitions that we set maybe years ago that now secretly or quietly control our performance. You know, I'm a 9-minute miler. I'm a 100K year guy. I'm not creative. I'm not a good leader. They all sound harmless, but they actually dictate our output more than, maybe more than talent, maybe more than circumstance ever will. You know, I ran that 8-minute pace on Friday. And now I realized, you know, that I had this kind of epiphany, and I'm like, gosh, I've been running around saying I'm a 9-minute mile guy. And then I went out and ran on Saturday and Sunday at Central Park, and I ran again today and, and the next— and the next day— and, and I'm sorry, the day before. And I've been running right at about 8:15s, and I've been doing so pretty comfortably. Now, I didn't suddenly get fitter in one trip to New York. That didn't happen. I didn't magically improve my, my VO2 max. I just stopped believing that I was a 9-minute miler. I had this one realization, this one identity shift, and that's it. That's all that occurred here. Now, am I maybe getting fitter and I've been training a little bit more? Sure, sure, no question about it. I probably have shaved a little bit of time off if I pushed myself. But again, because I wasn't thinking about it, I wasn't trying to run harder, and it just happened and I didn't feel any different. That's when it exposed this governor. It made me really wonder, of course, no surprise what I'm going to say it next. Where else in my life am I— where else in my life am I running with this governor on? In business and in relationships and how I build wealth or how I lead my teams? How many of my limits are just outdated beliefs? These outdated beliefs that, that used to serve me but now, but now hold me back. So where else might this show up? In business, I think leaders often say, hey, this is just the size we can handle, or this is how many agents we can manage, or this is what our margins have always been. That's the business version of the, of, of my 9-minute mile. In wealth, we tell ourselves, oh, I'll, I'll never be a millionaire, or I'm not great with money. But those beliefs control your financial speed more than your income ever will. In relationships or health, it's, you know, we have a tendency to accept, well, this is just who I am. And then we stop challenging that. I think that's, that's not really, I guess that's not realism. That's more conditioning. The identity that you're actually protecting might be the ceiling you need to break. So the lesson here, the lesson here is that identity sets your limits. Like at No Days Off, we talk about mindset all of the time. But even still, I think most of us probably misunderstand it to an extent. Mindset is not just positive thinking. Mindset is about identity. Once you identify as something like, "I'm this kind of person, I'm this kind of performer," your brain will work overtime to keep you consistent with that story. So, if you think you're a 9-minute miler, guess what? You're unconsciously slowing yourself down to match that identity. You'll literally manufacture mediocrity, not because you can't go faster, but because you don't believe you're the kind of person who actually can. So, we have to make a shift. We have to remove the governor. I think here's how we do this. Number 1, like I did, question the label. Question the label. I want you to write down one belief about yourself that feels factual, and then I want you to ask, is this actually true or just familiar? Write down one belief about yourself that feels factual and then ask, is this actually true or just familiar? Number 2, now go and borrow a new identity. If you want to level up, start acting like the person who already performs at that level. For me, that meant running like an 8-minute guy before I believed I was one. And by the way, the verdict is still out. I'm only a handful of days in, but I did kind of trigger something in me to go find out. So number 1, question the label. Number 2, borrow a new identity. And then number 3, detach from proof. You don't need evidence before you upgrade your identity. The evidence will show up afterward. Confidence follows action, not the other way around. So you might not be a runner, and I'm totally cool with that. That's totally fine. But somewhere in your life, in your business or your relationships or your wealth, you're probably running with some degree of governor, you know, that's on. You've told yourself a story about what you're capable of, and that story has quietly become your speed limit? What would happen if you took it off? What if you stopped measuring yourself by what you've always done and started running with the flow of people already moving faster? That's what Central Park did for me. That's what it taught me. Some— sometimes you don't need a, a new plan or a new coach or a new strategy. You just need a new identity. So take off the governor and let's see how fast, let's see how fast you can really go. That's all I have for you today, the No Days Off Podcast. Thank you so much for listening. And remember, every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. So let's get after it.