Brian Gubernick contrasts resume virtues (measurable achievements) with eulogy virtues (character traits people remember). He traces the idea to David Brooks and argues entrepreneurs neglect the second kind. His late mentor Mac Newton, a taekwondo master and Super Bowl trainer, showed that work ethic, generosity, and humility matter more than trophies.
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Thank you for joining me today. It's Brian Gubernick, and welcome to the No Days Off podcast, where we believe that every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. Today we are going to dive into an idea that, that kind of hit me hard the first time I heard it, and, and I just recently heard this when I was listening to a podcast, uh, where Morgan Housel was being, was being interviewed. Morgan is the author of one of my favorite wealth books, The Psychology of Money. He also has a brand new book out right now. And, and Morgan talked about this distinction that I think every ambitious, hard-charging entrepreneur really needs to hear. The distinction was between what Morgan quoted as resume virtues versus eulogy virtues. Resume virtues versus eulogy virtues. See, most of us spend our lives chasing one type, but the world has a tendency to remember us for the other. So today I'd like to unpack what these virtues are. I want to talk around how we, how we mix them up. And I want to discuss why understanding the difference can, can change how you approach your work and your relationships and your life. Now, Morgan Housel didn't invent this phrase. When I researched it, it actually came from a gentleman named David Brooks who made it pretty famous. But Housel talks about it in a way I think that lands with our No Days Off Nation. Here's, here's the breakdown. When you think around resume virtues, these are the things that you write on LinkedIn, the things you brag about in bios, the accomplishments that, that fit in a, in a bullet point sort of list. Maybe it's titles, sales volume, revenue, awards, milestones, degrees, promotions. These are all about skill and they're about performance. They're about your work output. Now, eulogy virtues are a little different. These are the things that people say about you when you're gone. How you treated people, how you made other, other people feel, your generosity, your integrity, your courage. Your character, your humility. I think Morgan Housel's point is simple, but it's, it's pretty darn powerful. We spend the majority of our lives optimizing for resume virtues, even though everyone we love will remember us for eulogy virtues. This creates a tension that, that I think we we need to talk about a little bit more. Think about someone that, that you admired. Maybe it was a mentor, or a parent, or a friend. Now, when you think about them, especially if they're, they're no longer on this planet, what comes to mind? Is it their net worth? Maybe. Is it their job title? Is it what would show up as like their resume bullet points? Maybe, but, but probably not. You likely remember them for something more human. Maybe how they treated people or how they carried themselves. Maybe it was their standards or their presence or the way they encouraged you. See, the very things we struggle to measure are, are the things that tend to matter most. And I, I think that's the, the whole punchline. As Morgan Housel puts it, resume virtues matter for your career, but eulogy virtues matter for your legacy. Great lives integrate both of those things. Weak lives instead obsess over the first and likely ignore the second. Now, if you've been listening to the No Days Off podcast for some time, you know that I had a mentor named Mac Newton, who I've referenced many an episode. And, and he passed away not too long ago. And I still quote and talk around Mac and the lessons that I was able to draw from him and am fortunate now to turn around and share with our audience. Well, Mac was an incredibly accomplished athlete. I mean, one of the world's greatest taekwondo masters to ever live. He won a World Series, multiple World Series as an athletic trainer. He won a Super Bowl as an athletic trainer. I mean, as I've described him in the past, he's kind of like the Forrest Gump of, at least in my world. And while I certainly recognize all of those successes that Mac had professionally, that's not what I remember when people ask me about Mac Newton. What I remember about Mac Newton was all that he talked about and displayed around work ethic, sacrifice, Forgiveness, leadership, how he carried himself, his standards, the presence he commanded when, when he stepped into a room. These are the things I remember about Mac. These are his eulogy virtues that created his legacy. Now entrepreneurs are vulnerable to, to this, this trap. This trap of obsessing over the wrong virtues or emphasizing the wrong virtues. Not that we don't think about both, but overemphasizing the wrong ones. And that's because we're driven by numbers. We're driven by the math. We're— we have KPIs and we're growth obsessed. In other words, we're wired to measure progress. Here's the problem though. We say what gets measured gets managed, and what doesn't get measured gets ignored. And no one really tracks things like how many people did you lift up today? How many moments were you fully present? How many times did you choose integrity over convenience? How often did I practice humility today? These are not metrics that show up on the dashboard. But the impact is 100 times greater than most any business metric. See, entrepreneurs can unintentionally drift into a life where the resume grows while the character shrinks. And I think that's when things break. Families break, reputations break, relationships break, health breaks, the joy of the journey breaks. See, resume virtues will get you paid, but eulogy virtues will make your life worth living. And you, and you need both. I can think about one person in my life right now, um, who I was, I was in business with for quite some time, that I, when I think around, you know, his professional career, uh, I think he, he probably stacked a lot more resume virtues and was focused exclusively on that and focused a heck of a lot less on the eulogy virtues. And as a result, I think lots of things broke in his world. Let me rephrase that. I know lots of things broke. The resume virtues in his scenario got him paid, but the eulogy virtues, you know, those are the things that stood in the way of him, him really living that life worth living. So let's bring all of this into something actionable for you, something you could start doing today. I think, I think there's a couple places that you can intentionally develop eulogy virtues without sacrificing your ambition, because I want to make sure we're clear. I'm not looking to sacrifice ambition. I think the first place you can go, presence over productivity. Pick a moment during the day where you put the phone away. Shut the noise off and then be all in with someone who matters. I think another thing, generosity, um, without transaction. Do one thing this week purely because it's the right thing, not because it gets you anything. This sort of true generosity compounds, at least compounds internally. I think look for Courage in small moments. Like, you don't need a big heroic act. You just need to choose the right thing in the small inconvenient moment— moments. So find an opportunity to display courage. Find a small moment to do that. That's where character is built. And then one that I think we could all apply: humility in success. When something goes right for you this week, a win, a deal, a milestone, practice humility, give credit, share the win, thank someone, remember publicly that you didn't do it alone. So your action item, pick one eulogy virtue that you want to build, just one, and then do me a favor and do yourself a favor and practice it intentionally for the next 48 hours. I'm not saying do it forever. I'm not saying do it for a year. Just gimme 2 days. Just gimme 48 hours. Practice one eulogy virtue that you want to build. Maybe choose from integrity or generosity or courage or humility, kindness, patience, presence. At the end of the next couple of days, ask yourself, did I live that virtue today? If the answer is no, okay, reset the clock and adjust. If the answer is yes, build from there. That's all I have for you today, the No Days Off Podcast. Thank you so much for listening, and remember, every single day brings a new opportunity to get better. So let's get after it.
