A family finds a duck wandering inside their house and names it Quackers. They coo over its feathers, roughhouse with it a little, and reassure the confused bird they won't hurt it.
Look, Mama found a duck in the house. Found a little ducky in the house, Mama. Found a little duck in the house.
That's what I say. Dirty duck.
Dirty ducks in the house. Ah! I love you, Quackers.
I love you.
I love you like my— I love you like my— you're my own little duckling.
How'd you get in this house? Oh Lord, I see feathers flying in the house. I'm torturing my poor duck. Okay, say hi there, buddy.
Okay. I love you.
Okay, I'm done torturing you. I'm done torturing you. I know Daddy's a bad— I'm a bad daddy, I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know. Bad daddy.
My baby. I would never hurt you, Quackers.
Okay, go play.
