How to Alchemize Disappointment with Penny Hounsome

You're listening to the PT Profit Podcast. Today, I'm sitting down with Coach Penny, and we are discussing how we can alchemize disappointment. Are you ready? Let's get started. Hi, I'm Beverly Simpson, former fitness manager turned online personal training business owner. And this podcast is where smart fitness professionals, including trainers and clinicians, discover how to increase client performance and movement, package and position their products and services and get out of their own way so that they can increase their revenue to live a life that they love without sleazy sales. Welcome to the PT Profit Podcast. What's up, coach? Thank you so much for pushing play on another episode of the PT Profit Podcast. I'm your host, Beverly Simpson, and I'm really excited to bring this episode out to you today because this is something that happens so much to people when they are working through starting and growing profitable businesses. Because at the end of the day, what happens to a lot of people is they start to go into patterns of doing the same thing over and over again. And sometimes it can feel really draining, sometimes it can feel daunting, and sometimes it can feel like the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing over again, expecting a different result. And how can you protect your mind and your heart and your brain from internalizing disappointment? So it's one of those things that my coach always says to me, which is living on the razor's edge, where you care about everything and nothing at the same time. And then how you can look at the data and be discerning about what needs to, you know, what just needs more volume of people, how you can decide whether or not something, an asset is viable or not, what needs a little bit more time. And then honestly, how you can press that reset button and just start to feel good, like, oh, yeah, this is it. This is what I'm doing, and this is part of the process. And. And I'm going to bless and release. And then how you don't take that personally. How can you carry out everything and nothing at the same time? So we're talking about how to keep our mind right when we are consistently faced with disappointment. Because the truth is, most people will say no. So without further ado, let's go ahead and roll that interview. Okay, we're live. And I see that Penny is here. She's joining me live right now. Hey. Hey. Hi, Penny. How are ya?

I'm good. How are you?

I'm doing so good. So we're currently live, as you can see, inside of the group. Penny has been amazing because I keep throwing her into these hot seats where I just make.

I'm the hot seat now. It's just like, just my chair now.

Oh, I love it. I love it. Listen, one of the most powerful things that you can do is practice and practice in public, 100%.

Oh, my God. Are you going to make me practice a sales call?

Well, this is going to be your time. You can come here and do whatever it is that you want to talk about. What can I support you in?

Okay, so I don't know. We, you know, let's. I wouldn't mind practicing another sales call because, you know, listen, everybody else will benefit from it. So the other thing, too, and I. Lisa and I have talked about this, and for those of you who don't know, Lisa is my business partner, and we were going to bring this up in group tomorrow anyway. How do you get into that mindset when you want to sell to people who are looking to level up, opposed to the people that we call it the mud. I know it's really gross, but. Sorry. That's what we do, you know, because we're always, as professionals, we're always like, we want to help everybody. So how do we move out of that space mentally to sell here when we're, like, still kind of selling down where we need to sell up to the people who actually want to make a change in their world and they're ready to level up, opposed to trying to drag the people forward that we know we. We want to help them. We know that we can use. They can. They can use our help, but they don't really want the help. They just want to complain about it still.

Oh, my gosh, you're asking such a powerful question. Okay, so just to recap, here's what I heard, right? How do we speak to people in momentum? How do we speak to people who are recognized and ready that they want to. They actually want to make a change? And so there's two parts to this question. Now, Penny's heard me talk about this a lot. A lot, a lot. So forgive me, as I Reiter reiterate some of the things that you may. May not have already heard before, but what we're talking about here is how do we speak to the champagne client? And I don't mean the Beyonce's of the world, the 1% of the 1%. I mean the. The person who realizes the urgency of the problem and they're ready to take action and actually move towards. Towards solving it. Now, here's the reason why this. People want to avoid this conversation. Oftentimes is because most people think that, oh well, if my client was in that much of momentum, then they probably wouldn't have a problem and they'd already be solving it. So that's one of the mistakes and misconceptions that people operate from. The second mistake and misconception conception is, is that oftentimes, especially when we're maybe not even new to the space, but when we're new to messaging, when we're new to communicating our offers to the right person at the right time, what happens is we want to help the people who were right at the beginning or stuck in the mud or what I like to say, drowning in knee deep water because they have, they have the, the, the biggest exponential chance of growth. Meaning that if they just made these 1, 2, 3 small changes, it would have an exponential like growth explosion. So sometimes we want to avoid talking to the people who are in momentum because maybe they growth is only like 1% bit better.

Right. But there are also the people that are not willing to put the money that they need to put towards themselves because they're still stuck in people pleasing, they're still stuck in. Oh, I, I, I, you know, basically I, I don't know how to say pissing and moaning and crying into their tea because it's like I know I need this, but I don't know how to do it. Here's the answer. Oh, I don't want to spend the money.

Yes, yes, yes.

But they're already spending the money on all the wrong things.

Yes.

So there's no right. So then how do we move that messaging from level one awareness, which I, I feel I'm pretty good at the level one awareness, but now I need to move that like that content that I build into level two and level three awareness. How do we move that up? So how do I get my mindset in the right place to move my content and my sales into level two, level three awareness? Oh my gosh, look at me using all the words. I know.

Okay, so there's actually two things that you're talking about in at play and it's worth bringing to your attention which is that you had mentioned, you know, I want to speak to the people who are in momentum because the ones that aren't in momentum won't spend the money, but they actually are spending the money. So to me I'm hearing there's a belief there for you to look at, right, which is that people not in momentum don't want to spend money. And that is, and, and what I want to offer to you is that that actually might be true. I don't know if that's true. It might be true for some people. But what caught my ear is you said they're spending the money on something and they are spending the money on. It's not that they don't have it.

Right.

What it is is that we need to demonstrate and we need to communicate what they are saying yes to.

So that's my mindset that I need to shift.

We need to look. Yes.

Right. So I'm not sure how to do that.

Yeah, yeah.

As well. As well. Right. Like as well. So I recognize that it's me as well as. And like, you know, maybe that base of selling, trying to sell from ego, from my head because it's like I can help you. You should do this. Like I you write like the program work opposed to now I need to shift that into a heart center and sell from the heart because here's what is the offer. So I feel, and I've recognized this past week from all the like everything that we've been talking about in all the group calls is that how do I now get out of my head and sell from the heart and then change the way I sell in the sales call and in my marketing or in my content?

Oh my gosh. Evidence is a double edged sword. And I experience. Let me rephrase. Experience is a double edged sword. Right. Because what I have been asking myself. You're asking for the same thing that I've been asking for. I want that reset button. I want to go back to have all of the experience that I have and knowledge and skill that I have. And the beginner's mindset of like every moment is amazing. It's like a fresh, it is like a fresh start. Like I get to talk to a person. Like if I could bottle that up, that would be amazing.

Okay. Right. Right.

So how you do it. Right. And, and this is just my own, this is my own thoughts and how I have done it for myself. Right. Is that there's two things. Right. If we're in a rut, it meaning that. And how do I determine what a rut is? I determine a rut. Mean I've built all these things, systems in place. And then on a consistent basis, like within like the last 14 days, I'm noticing that my consistency has dropped. I'm noticing that my sales conversations are not closing. I'm noticing that I'm constantly in a state of, of a negative spiral. And when I say negative, I'm talking about, like, why isn't this like, frustration in a sense of frustration? And, you know, I'm just very present to what is going on in my mind, like, what am I saying about this situation, experience already? What are the preconceived things that I'm saying and going into when I'm going into this experience? Okay, so that. So the first thing is just recognizing that, like, I'm in a rut versus, like, I'm having a bad day when I'm like, oh, did I just not sleep well? Did I not just, like, did I not eat enough protein? Right. Like, recognizing those. So this is when I lean on the data because everything I do is data driven decisions. So when I'm looking at my data week to week, I'm like, oh, maybe I'm potentially in a rut.

Okay. I would say I'm probably then from your description, in a bit of a rut.

Okay, great. I have to get my husband's toy. Just hold on, wait, let me explain this. It's my daughter's toy, but it's from my husband when he was a kid.

And we all just get to really think about that. So she's getting her husband. There we go.

And so my husband would be devastated if he knew that his childhood toy was chewed up by the dog while I was home. Charlie. Yeah, Naughty. Okay.

Oh, that training worked.

Okay, so when we're in a rut, okay, when we're in a rut, one of the first things that we're going to have to do is we need to recognize it, we have to notice it, we have to name it, we have to say, oh, this is what's happening. And then we need to get back to neutral. So when it comes, get back to baseline. And when we look at him, he's going to steal the show.

He wants it.

So when we are getting back to baseline, what does that mean? That means that we have to go back to. You know, it's funny. It's so funny what I'm about to say, because it's like, what comes up a lot too, in accelerator programs and for me too as well, is that oftentimes the things that we need to do are the things that we teach.

And sometimes, yeah, yeah, it's true. Because I know I sit there and it's like, okay, I need to start journaling again. Okay. Because I just literally told all my clients last night in a group call, like, okay, you need, you guys need to do this and you need to envision it. And we just did A guided imagery with my. Our clients in our group call, and then they had to journal about it. And quite frankly, you're right, I need to do the same thing.

And I think the reason why this happens. Right, I think the reason why this happens is because what we are so accustomed to doing, we're unconscious, consciously competent to it. And so it's easy for us to put it on the back burner because we think, oh, yeah, I'll get to that.

Right. Of course. All the time.

All the time. Right. And then we're constantly in the trenches with it, with our clients, so it gives us this false sense of, I'm doing it for myself, when in reality, you're not really.

Yeah, it's like, yeah, because I talk about meditation all day, talk about, like, journaling all day, talk about, like, eating well. I mean, eating well. That's. That part's there. Yeah, yeah. So. And then all of a sudden, I realized, like, I haven't meditated in two weeks.

Yeah, so.

Exactly.

So it's part of the, like, noticing, naming it, and then getting back into.

And then.

And then alchemizing it. Right. And so for me, that looks like, hey, I'm feeling crummy, crappy about this. I recognize that I'm gonna thank that part of my brain that needs me to know that, like, hey, it's safe for me to do hard things. It's for me to, like, try something on, practice it, feel disappointment, and then do it anyway and then do it again.

Right. So we can so really just do all that and then, like, make the mindset shift into letting go of what we call people in the mud. Like, just let them go. Because it's like, they don't want to help. They're not at that moment. They're not at the right time. They're not there. Move up the ladder to the next level, where that level is. They're ready to go. They have a momentum. Oh, I get it. So it's like. Because they're already. They're in the middle of their gap, so I can pull them through to the next problem and then help them move forward to that because then they want to see the momentum. Oh, my God. It's, like, works in all things.

And then. And then the other thing, too. I have two thoughts. I'm going to finish this out, like, once you get back to neutral.

Right? Yeah.

Then we need to check our input. Right. And what I mean by input is, like, what are you listening to on a daily basis for a short term? Like, once you Neutralize that, like, amps you up. That gets you back to, like, high performance. That's like. You know, some people, Mel Robbins, Tony Robbins, like, Brene Brown. Like, who is it that speaks into the heart that's like, ah, yeah, I'm gonna help people today.

Right.

And then get into that. And then start your day. Right. And then for you specifically is that we have to remember and we have to live on the razor's edge where we care about everything and nothing at the same time. You cannot do this job and want so much for someone to, like, help themselves, but you can't want it more than them. It's like, hey, I'm going to meet you where you're at. I can't want this more than you do.

And it's funny that you say that, because I normally, I'm reasonably okay with, like, separating myself, but I got into this business to help people. I got. I mean, it's been 27 years. I do this because I love what I do, and I love, like, helping people and I love watching people like, like excel. But this past week, I knew there was a problem when I was awake half the night, because one of our clients in our group, she was like, oh, I'm just going to do this, and then I'm going to bake brownies. And then I'm going to, like, I'm just going to not come to the meeting. And all of a sudden it was like, what the hell?

Yeah.

And like, I was up all night, all night, going, like, in my brain going, oh, my God, why is she not doing this? What's happening was she's going to sabotage herself. She did. She went away last time and she screwed up everything. And it was this kind of like. And then I woke up in the morning, I went, why? Why am I so concerned when she's not. Then I realized I have a problem. Like, I'm too invested in the people that don't real. Like, I mean, she's making strides and she's doing really well, but I'm more. I'm more invested than she is.

Yes.

And that was, I recognize, as a problem.

Yes. And then the other thing, too, that I want to say, and it's going to speak to your original question is, like, we've all heard. I can't remember the exact phrase, but it's like, you know, like, the boats rise, like, all tide. Like when. When the tide rises, all boats rise.

Yeah, whatever.

You know what I'm talking about, right?

I know what you're talking about, but I Don't know that. I don't know how it goes either. I don't know.

I don't know actual like, you know, motivational double tap, Instagram quote. But the concept is that like, when one boat rises or the tide rises, all boats will rise together. Right? So here's the thing. When you're speaking to an advanced someone who's in advanced, the someone who's stuck in the mud that's out of the contemplative state and ready to take charge, they don't want to be with beginners. They want to be with high performers, usually. Right, Right. So the tide will rise when you're speaking to them. So it's not that you're not for that. You're forgetting them. You're just speaking to the person who's. Who you're not dragging off the couch. They've gotten up off the couch.

Right. They just don't already.

Yeah, right.

They're already in their boat.

Yeah, they're in the boat. They want the tide to rise now. They want to be with the rest of the tide, but they're in the boat. You're not pulling them into the boat. Right.

Okay, so then I've got to get my mind straight and do the things I need to do and all the things I teach to do in order to get to that next level. And then with that mindset, then do the content, write the content in that fashion where it's like level two, level three, awareness to bring those people in.

And then the other thing I want to say, because listen, all high achievers have this. Okay, I know. I mean, I'm.

I'm assuming serious when you're bringing the mic closer, you know it's going to be a good way.

Every high achiever I have ever met has this where it's so easy to focus on the gap and with at the cost of the game. And that when we're doing all of this stuff, when we're like, the goal post just keeps moving, keeps moving, keeps moving, Right. And then part of being in a coaching container is like getting blind spots, getting feedback. And sometimes when the feedback is like, they're iffy, especially if you're with me. I just hate to say it right, but my feedback that I give is not like not coming from this place of everything you did was terrible. But here are some ways and areas of opportunity. Right. So when, when you're feeling that or see that it's. It can be easy to be like, oh, see, everything I do sucks when that's just not the case. Nobody ever arrives. In fact, it's like when the. The true masters became masters, when they recognized the. I don't know anything. Messaging is always evolving. We never just arrive. Like, okay, got it. Nailed it. I have done hundreds and hundreds. Thousand, if not thousands. I cannot tell you how many conversations I have had considered sales calls for since 2000. I mean, nine. So it's decades of conversations practice that I'm still continuing to learn. Nobody just arrives.

Okay. It's also good to know, though, because as well, you know, like, you finally get a handle on, like, level one awareness, content. And now you realize, like, now I got to do level two. Oh, wait, wait, there's level three to learn, and then there's. Oh, wait, I gotta speak. So, yeah, trying to differentiate, like, like, we know our avatar, we know who our person is. We know our client, we know what they're doing. But now we have to know which level and the psychographics of where they are. So. Right. Like, and it's all of a sudden, it's like that psychographic has changed because now we have to pull it up over here. So even though it's the same woman, they're not over here. They're. They're now over here brunching and, you know, going on vacation. But, like, it's like. And. And it's funny too, because, like, we talk to women and they're like, oh, but I have to go on vacation. But really we realize it's another mass that they're using because they're still unhappy and they're trying to, like, find that fix. Except their fixes now aren't just like a buying a lipstick. Their. Their fix needs to be so much bigger because their problems are, like, so much more ingrained. So now we're trying to talk to those people.

Oh, my gosh. So this is.

Yeah.

And so here's the thing. Okay. And this is what I want. I just want to give you some context in terms of, like, something I experience. The something that I'm experiencing right now is that you're speaking to someone who has what. What I call, well, what has been known to, like, be the fourth layer of saturation. Right. So this is a concept that comes from breakthrough advertising, which is that once you get to the fourth layer of saturation, it requires a fourth level of sophistication in your communication. So what this means is when someone's in the fourth level is that not only do they have a. A million options to solve the problem, they already think they know what to Do. And so when you shift their perspective in your, in your enrollment call, or in your, in your limitless motivation free call, or when you shift their perspective in your, in your trainings, in your master classes, that you do, this is why that stuff becomes powerful. Because subconsciously you position yourself as an authority and the subconscious mind goes, ooh, I want to learn from that person. So I'll give you an example of what this can look like, right? Is that I'm someone, I would consider myself a champagne client in the sense that I'm in momentum. I've been in momentum in terms of the context of my problems and goals. I'm always in momentum. I'm never usually in the contemplative state.

Right.

So I'm currently doing this mindset reset.

Okay.

Right now. And so what I realized and what has happened to me in this moment as I'm on day four of this 10 day mindset reset, is that, Is that the things I thought I handled are things that I thought I took care of. Because I know this. I'm like, oh, wow, I didn't realize how convicted this had of me. This is what I tell the accelerators all the time. Your people are all operating from mistakes and misconceptions. So here is an example of my misconception of like, oh, man, I thought I handled this. I didn't realize how, I didn't realize how gripped I am by this. Like, one of the protocols that we have to do in this mindset reset is no input. Meaning we can't, we can't have any education, no podcast, no courses, no book. Were just getting present to self. And I didn't recognize or even realize how much I actually use. Like when I'm working out, I listen to James's podcast sometimes. I'm like, I'm, I'm. I'm listening to other people's sales calls. Like, I do a lot of input, but I wasn't present to that.

I do the same thing. Like when I do my yoga, I'm listening to a podcast. Yeah, I know I'm not supposed to. I get it. As a yoga instructor, I'm well aware of what I should be doing. I should be doing. Yeah, like, I'll, I'll listen to, like, I'll like, yeah, like there's never a time I'm not reading a book or like taking, like finishing my course or working. It's. Yeah, there's no downtime.

Exactly. So this is an example of, you know, because I always joke to the accelerators, I'm like, no one's walking around going, oh, my limiting belief has got me today. Right. I just wasn't even present.

To the.

Fact that this had gripped me. Right. And then you get to facilitate those kinds of transformations for your clients. Like, Cassie asked me the other day on Instagram. I saw it. She said, how. How do you demonstrate a quick win for your client when you are in, like, a training or when you're in a. When you're in an enrollment call, will you help them get present to the truth that they weren't present to? And we undervalue that thinking, ah, that's not enough because it's so easily uncompetent for us. But when you can make the complex simple enough for your clients to take consistent action without sacrificing the complexity, you. That's mastery.

And we had that in two of our sales calls this past. This past week so far. You know, asking them where they are, what do they want? Like, who do they want to be? What does their life look like? Like, right. Like, where do you see yourself in a year? And they're like. They were like, I never thought of it. Like, they, like, literally, one of them was crying the whole time going, I never under. I don't. I don't know who I am anymore. Right. And then when we ask her, like, okay, well, how do you feel you're gonna get there? I don't know. Do you feel we can help you? Yes. Okay. So. Because otherwise, you know, flat out asked, like, you know, what was your plan? I don't know. Basically, to sit at the kitchen table and cry into her teeth was her plan. But so, yeah, like, there is more like two. This. This week that literally when we asked, like, who are you? Like, who are you? What do you want? And they both went, I don't know. And they had never thought of that. Like, they hadn't even thought to even. That. Even thought to think that to even ask themselves that question.

Yeah.

So I kind of. I kind of need now see where I need to put my content this next week coming. I just, like, all of a sudden, my, like, went ding, ding, ding. And I was like, I love that.

They're so good. Okay, so let's talk about some. You wanted to practice. So what. Let's talk about what specifically in the sales call. Practice is the hardest part for you, would you say.

The hardest part is swinging it around from. Okay, no. We had one, and she just didn't even want to get better. So, like, I mean, I. I would say she was a lost Cause and we let her go like her aunts. She really literally didn't even want to make a change in her world because she wanted to stay. She wanted to stay stuck.

Okay, so then it was, why was she on the call?

Well, that was kind of our question as well. So, like, you could kind of feel it within the first. I mean, it was a short call. We got off reasonably fast. I think it was like 35 minutes at most. But it's almost. You could feel it after the 20 minute mark. You could literally feel where it wasn't going to go anywhere. So maybe my question is, where did you just end it? Like, you just go, thanks for showing up. We're done now here's your insight. You want nothing else. And we just. And just like rip the band aid off and just end the call and don't waste my another 15 minutes on that.

Okay, Interesting, interesting, interesting. Okay, so here's the thing, right? So. So what I would want to know. Tick tock. What I would want to know and what I would want to dig into right now. It's very interesting. Okay, so the, the I. What I teach in an enrollment colleges for context is I teach five phases of a con of a call, which is the frame. We're going to go into core premise, core content. We're going to go into the close, and then we need to communicate through resistance. People talk about this as overcoming objections. Okay. And typically the. The front end and the back end are the most important parts. But you cannot get to these parts here, which Betty has experienced, without making sure that we dial in the micro yeses throughout the entire sales process.

So she didn't have a micro anything. Like, it was a hard. And she's worked. She's worked with Lisa before. Right? So she knows us. She's in our group. She does the challenges. She's very active in the group. But like, it was. I mean, I pull. I could have pulled my own tooth out easier than even just getting to what's. What's. What goal? Well, she's like, names and stuff and maybe, maybe something will come to me.

Okay, so great. So when. So what Penny's asking and talking about is like, she doesn't even have wants, desires. There is no striving. So when that comes up, right? So then I'm going to switch into the problem syntax and then what's the problem? Did she give you problems?

No, she gave us nothing. Like, it was like. Gave us nothing. I had nothing to work with. I had like, nothing. Like, no accountability issues. No, like she just. Nothing. And it was like, okay.

So when you asked her, when you said, okay, so then what are you currently struggling in with and what brought you to this call? What did she say?

She's like, well, I don't know. I just. I just. I don't. I just thought I should book it.

That's what she said. I thought I should.

Yeah. And then. So we asked her what challenges were coming up. She's like, I can't think of anything right now. Like, it's. It's like. And we're just like, I. I had no notes. I. I make. I know. Make notes. When they do the goals. I have challenges, so I can come back and I can refer to. I had literally nothing. And it was just, okay, great, great.

So when I'm hearing that, when people come in, okay, so I'm going to give you two things, right? So this is what happens, right, Is that I usually sync people in. So what happens sometimes is when I set the frame of the call to just give the frame is there to help build security, right? Safety. We want to put people at ease when they're coming into these conversations, right? And so the. What I talked about in the training on Tuesday, when I was live in the group, in this group, I talked about how people borrow their certain. They borrow certainty from you. And in order for them to get to a buying decision, they need to have certainty and feel safe that you're going to help them. Them. Right? And the frame helps set that up. And so when. When I ask, you know, what brought you to the call? And they're like, oh, well, you know what? You invited me, so I thought I'd come. I'm gonna drop people in right there. Being like, you literally could have done absolutely anything else with your time. There's a reason you're here. Why are you here?

Yeah.

And then they're like, right. The next thing you know, when someone gives me the answer, I don't know, right? I don't know. I'm gonna ask them. I asked them this question and I asked my husband this question, and it drives him crazy. He's like, stop it. Stop asking me this. But what I will do is I will let them sit for a second and I will say, well, what if you did know?

And we asked that? And she just. So she like. I mean, eventually I got out of her. It's not so much of a physical aspect that she needs, is a mindset. The mindset work. So I dug a little deeper into that and, you know, gave a bit of an insight to say that, you know what a lot of what she, her resistance comes from this defiance of authority. And that comes from a past trauma when, you know, whether that was when she was like somewhere between 10 and 11, 13, 14, and she's act like she used to work for the military. So there is that aspect of it and there is all those issues there. I can't go in, I can't say more because it's private. So there's those. So when I nailed that about the authority issue, which holds her up because she has a time management problem. So I, I went in on that, you know, and then she was like, oh, yeah, that could be it. But then she flips and goes, well, you know, like the military, they like the. Just like the veterans thing, they cover that. So I can, I can take that to like the psychiatrist there and I can get that covered by the ve. And the vet will pay. The vet, like veterans will pay for that. And I was like, yeah, you could. If they come up with it as fast as I do. I'm not saying I'm a psychiatrist. I'm not, but I'm just very good. So. But she, she recognized that that was. Whatever happened back when she like preteen. Something about against the authority was why she has a management. Time management problem because she recognizes that if I, if I, if I am on schedule, then I have, I'm following an authority, and if I don't, then I can defy it, which means then the time management leads into poor meal planning, missing meals, feeling like crap, not sleeping well, all of those things. So.

But her nervous. What I'm hearing you say is that her nervous system goes awry when she's perceived with authority. So when that. If I know that now, I'm going to change the context of my question. Okay. So what I mean by that is instead of asking direct questions now, I'm going to use more invitational language.

Right. Which I don't. Yeah, I don't think I did that.

When you're ready, you know, I'd invite you to explore and I'd love to hear from you if that's okay.

Right. Okay.

So it's like it's on. Because what happens is now I know that, oh, we have some defiance here. This is probably her nervous system responding in this way because.

Right.

Seeing you, even though she might logically be telling you, you know, that she, she's fine, that she's at ease, not her nerve, the brain is weird. And I probably don't have to tell you that. Right. But her brain is going. Authority go sideways.

Yeah. Which is, which is exact. Which exactly what she did when you what when we go back, I think we. I'm not sure if we sent the tape to you. Yeah. So. And that's, you know, so all of a sudden it was like you could see it like she looks at us as the authority. So that was. And I didn't make that connection until after. Sure, sure, sure, sure.

So you're, you know, and so to an. So answer the question directly. When someone says like listen, I'm not getting anything in the discovery phase. Okay, so this is what I'll say. And this is. And maybe. And this is just me. Okay. So like this is my. And this is just because of how I teach and what I think and what I, you know, what I would do is that for me, I do. I. Nothing I do is from pressure. Everything is permission based. Everything is. Is pressure free. Like I don't want any. There's no pressure. And this is the thing I think a lot of people forget and the reason why they want to avoid sales calls and sales conversations is because they think that it's going to be pressure.

Right?

Mistakes and misconceptions against all things. They think it's going to be pressure. And so for me, I want to reduce and address and lower all barriers of pressure. There's no pressure here, okay? And so for me, if I'm in this container and I'm recognizing and realizing that there is, I can't get anything. I can't even get to the truth that the wall of. Of resistance is so thick that I can't even get her to open up and to. And to feel safe enough to talk.

Talk.

Then I will two step it. I will close the call. I will be like, listen, we really need call is for us if, for all. For all of this call to be successful. Let's. Here's your homework. Let me invite you to consider doing these journal prompts. And this is what I want you to think about, okay? And I want you to do this on your own terms. When you're ready, when you feel safe, this is what I need you to do. And then once you go and do that, then let's reschedule this call and then we can get to the root of it. Because in order for you to get ba ba ba benefit or desired outcome so that then. Or so that desired outcome so that benefit, then this is the work I need to get done first.

Okay?

And then I would and I close it if I If I can't get. If it's like pulling it, like what you said, which is like, I could probably pull a tooth faster. If that's the truth, then her nervous system needs to. We need to chill her nervous system and then come back.

Okay. So the next time we come into that situation, we just, like, two steps. Okay, all right, I can do that. Right.

Like, I just call yesterday with someone who was absolutely going, so, you know, her nervous system is going just crazy because she's got so much change happening within the next five weeks. And I was like, now is not the time to take this on. So this is what you're going to do. This is your homework. This is what I would suggest you do, and then let's revisit it in six weeks when you're now, you know, settled and sorted.

So do you also find that then set them up for a better mindset to come back? Because then they're like, oh, wait, why can't I join that?

I do a little bit. I do.

Yeah.

And. And to me, this is me. This is an example of me stepping into the leadership of the call in addition to now.

Right, okay. Okay. I just. Okay, that clicked again. Yeah, got it.

In addition to never putting pressure on it, this is also, like, I don't come to these calls of like, all right, I'm gonna sell you.

Right, Right.

So this is something I also talk about, and it's important for all of us to recognize and remember, is that there are two objectives at play at all times. Times, Whether they're watching your posts, whether they're reading your. Whether they're coming to your lives, whether they're. They're going to your masterclass or coming to your calls. They're coming for information. You are facilitating a transformation.

Right.

At all times.

Right.

And so when I know this, for me, that means that I am lowering all of the barriers to making a buying decision. Because people hate to be sold to, but love to buy is Right. Right. They want their problems solved. So when you can position yourself as like, hey, and I said this. I've said this a while, which. A couple times in the accelerator call, which is like, hey, listen, nothing in my life's going to change, but neither is yours.

Right?

Are you okay with that? Because I'm okay with that, but are you?

Right?

And I'm willing to bet that if you're here, it means that there. There's a reason, because you can literally be doing anything else with your time. So whether you know what that reason is or not, there's a reason. So why don't we spe spend the next few minutes or the next few weeks or the next few days trying to figure out what that reason is.

Right. Okay.

Makes sense.

I just. Yeah. 100. Yeah. 100. Yeah. That.

And that's what I do. Right. And then, and then I, And I am coming it from the energy of like, like, hey, I'm, you know, and this is part of, like, not being in a rut.

Right.

Because every time I'm with someone, it is fresh. This is like no evidence. This is a fresh button. It's you and me and we're dealing with the problem at hand. And that's it.

Right. Awesome. Yep. 100.

Actually, if I notice I'm in that negative energy, then I'll. Then I'll go back to the keys of high performance. Get out of that Ruth.

Right. Yeah, I need to do that. I need to do that a little bit. It's a. It's been a long month. It's been a. It's like those. Everybody watching. I moved from Canada to Costa Rica and then, you know, had to, like, hit the ground running, work wise. So did you get your stuff? Oh, yeah, yeah. That took a while. I got all my things. And then of course, last week I got super sick and had to, like, go to the doctor. So yay, let's be in the country for 37 days. And already now I have a doctor, so. Plus, have a doctor.

So crazy. Okay, so did this help you? Do you feel like you have clarity? Do you know what to do?

Yeah, a lot of press. I do know it. I do know what to do because now we're going to make a million. I just sold you 1 million is my favorite thing.

It's like, it's, it's. Yeah, yeah, it's.

It's awesome. Yeah, no, I know what to do. It's going to be good. I'm going to raise this question again in group, though, tomorrow. The original. My original question. Okay, great.

And of course, we'll talk about. We'll talk about that more in specificity.

Yeah, exactly. All right, awesome.

Do you need anything else?

No, I'm good. I'm good to go.

Okay.

All right, well, thank you so much.

For hanging out with me. I really appreciate it. And I will see you. 10 minutes. Just kidding. Thank you for listening to the PT Profit podcast. If you like this episode, chances are your friends will too. So it would be a huge service to us if you would please leave us a review and share with your friends on your social media channels. When you leave us a review, be sure to take a screenshot of it and email that screenshot to my team atinfo simpson fitness.com and we'll send you a very special Instagram podcast that will show show you how to create compelling content so that your ideal clients come to you and you go from wanting clients to a waitlist of clients ready for your services. Thank you so much for listening and we'll see you on the next episode.