How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome and Grow Your Business

You're listening to the PT Profit Podcast, episode number five. Today we're talking through four ways you can overcome imposter syndrome. So are you ready? Stay tuned. Hi, I'm Beverly Simpson, former fitness manager turned online personal training business owner. And this podcast is where smart fitness professionals, including trainers and clinicians, discover how to increase client performance in movement, package and position their products and services, and get out of their own way so that they can increase their revenue to live a life that they love without sleazy sales. Welcome to the PT Profit Podcast. Hello and welcome back to the PT Profit Podcast. I'm super excited for today's episode. It's just me. We're going to be hanging out, talking all about imposter syndrome. But before we get started, I thought I would just pop in, say hi, and just kind of give you my update. Right now we are recording on Monday in June, and it is the June of 2020. It is the first day that I am home kid free. The kids are back in school, and I am having just. I am both excited, but also have that pit in my tummy because I miss them. And then I know that this is going to be the start of just a new normal. It's both exciting, but also I have that feeling. But I'm super excited because we're going to be really using the time to create a ton of content. My team and I, we are behind the scenes, really excited because I'm recording this and the podcast isn't live yet, but we have sent it to people who've been early, to clients, and also to people who've gotten on the list. And I'm already just blown away by the feedback we've been getting from the podcast. So I'm super excited about that and it's inspiring me to create a whole bunch of new content that I know is really going to change your life. So I'm super excited about it. I'm really excited for the new direction, the additional direction that be Simpson Fitness is going. So without further ado, let's just dive into the episode. And this one is actually something I'm eager to talk about because it comes up a lot with my clients. But honestly, it's something that I've had to really overcome. And if I'm really being honest with myself and fully transparent with you, it's one of those things that I think held me back from starting what I'm really put here to do. I'm really good at sales, I'm really good at communication. I'm really good at inspiring, inspiring other people into action and to motivate into action. And I think for the longest time I did not allow myself to really go down this path because of imposter syndrome. So I think it's really important early on that we just attack it. And also to say that it's something that is never going away. And I think it's brain based. And that's going to lead me. It's never going away. And that's because it's really rooted in fear, which is brain based. So that's going to lead me to number one. So when I'm talking about imposter syndrome, I think it's really just important to recognize what it is we're really dealing with. And imposter syndrome is just a fancy way of saying I'm afraid. And what are you afraid of? You're afraid of judgment. So specifically now, this is something I've had to look at with myself. It's also something I tell my clients right off the bat. Now, I've taught hundreds of classes on sales and in marketing, both online and in person. And this is something that comes up time and time again, which is why we always start with it is that most people are afraid that they're going to be rejected or, you know, if they're going up to new people or they're afraid that they're going to be judged. And nine times out of 10, I've found that it's not judgment from their client, it's judgment from their peer. Now this is something my mentor, one of my mentors said to me that really I've held onto it and I really remind people over and over again, is that the truth about judgment is that we're going to be judged 100% of the time. Literally 100% of the time, whether it is positive or negative, it is still judgment. And so if you know that, if you know that in your heart that you're going to be judged 100% of the time, why not just do something that you love? Say something that is true. And if you know that analytically, you know that you're going to be judged 100% of the time, why don't you just do something that you love? Because you know you're going to get judged anyway. I mean, think about it. Look at Go to Rotten Tomatoes and look at your favorite movie of all time, the movie that you live for. Go and look at the reviews. Chances are you're going to see at least one review that is the complete opposite of your belief. There's nothing on this planet that is 100% positive or 100% negative. There's always going to be someone who agrees and someone who doesn't agree. And that's a good thing because not one person can train or treat all 8 billion people in the world. And so the faster that you can accept that you are going to be judged and know it both positively and negatively and make a decision to do it anyway, the faster you are going to get and see success, the faster you are going to get traction, whether it be the lessons that you need or the successes that you want. And so the second part of that is, while we can understand analytically that this is judgment, we also have to deal with the brain based component, which is actually the feelings of fear. And now fear is never going away. It's something that will always be there. In fact, just as I hit record, there's nobody here. And I know that I can edit this podcast, but I literally have that feeling that I'm nervous feeling. I get that right? Fear is never going away. It's brain based. It is designed to keep us safe. Our brain, well, our habit brain, our reptilian brain. Now most of you know this, but our reptilian brain is sending you urges. Anytime you're making a change, anytime you're doing something bad, different, your habit brain is going to send you a signal and say, this is not safe. And that's where that fear is coming from. And fear, especially when it comes to content creation, program design, any type of thing that you're doing online or in person, it will also hide itself as perfectionism. Perfectionism is just another fancy way of being in fear, right? I mean, think about it. When you are striving for perfect, just ask yourself, how are you going to know when it's perfect, first of all? And second, what's causing you to want to be perfect? Nine times out of 10, I mean, I can't think of another reason except that you want to get it right. And let's just go for that one. You want to get it right. Meaning? Meaning that you want to get it in front of your people, that you want to get it right so that you can't get judged for being wrong or judged for messing up or judged for not helping your client. You also want to get it right or you also want to be perceived as getting it right and perfect in front of your colleagues. So perfectionism is just another fancy way of saying, I'm afraid and I get it. I felt both of those. So what do we do. How do we move past that? Well, first step number one, like we talked about today, you just recognize that that's what's causing it. Once you can bring something to the forefront of your brain, you can change it. Because, you know, we all know this, because many people listening to this podcast know that our brain loves automation, that our prefrontal cortex houses all of our analytical left brain. Chatter, chatter, chatter, chatter. But that the right side of our brain, where our subconscious lives, tends to do a lot. But that our habit brain live in the reptilian part of our brain. And so in order to change the habit or to create a new neural pathway in that brain, we need to bring it up to the forefront. We need to analytically know that it's there so that we can change it. So recognizing that we are feeling fear of judgment from our colleagues, from our clients, or not even necessarily judgment from our clients, but judgment because we feel like we failed them, or judgment from your clients in the sense that they didn't get the transformation that they were promised or think that you got it wrong. So recognizing that that fear exists, the second thing to do when you feel that, we need to acknowledge it and dismiss it. So what I tend to do is say thank you. When I feel fear, I will thank it. I know that sounds so weird and counterintuitive and a little woo woo, I get it. But listen, that fear urge is coming to you because your brain is trying to protect you. So I will say, thank you for protecting me. It is safe for me to put out this piece of content. This is just a habit. This is an urge. This is from my brain. This does not serve me. Thank you. This does not serve me. Thank you for protecting me. This does not serve me. I am someone who puts out content. I am someone with my clients best interest at heart. That's how I move through the fear and do it anyway. The second thing that I will do when it comes to perfectionism, this comes from another one of my mentors, Brandon, where once you can recognize that is that I've said to myself, 70% is perfect, 100%. I've waited too long. And it goes back to the question that I asked earlier, which is, how do you know it's going to be perfect? What are you comparing it to? Because the truth is that nothing's ever perfect. Perfect is subjective. Perfect compared to what? So that's how I really move through that fear of judgment. One, recognizing that it's there, there. Two, thanking the urge, Thanking that fear signal for keeping me Safe, but taking action anyway and then accepting that 70% is perfect and 100, waiting till you feel like it's 100% perfect, you're just too late. Especially when it comes to putting your products and service and courses out there, because you're not really going to know if it works or if it's effective until the rubber meets the road and until you get it in front of your clients and you start working with your clients on it, that's how you're really going to know. That's when the course will start to come together and develop, when you actually have some traction, some feedback from your clients. So the second step in overcoming imposter syndrome is number two, recognizing that you only need to be one step step ahead of your ideal client. So this has come up a lot, and in truth, this is something that came up with me, too, is that most people that I work with tend to have what I call the curse of a good coach. It is a curse. It is also a blessing. Right? Isn't that true of everything? Without the light, you cannot have the dark. But the truth of the matter is that my coaches and the way that I operate, that I come from this beginner's mindset, this understanding, this knowing that science is always changing or that new tactics and new strategies are out there, and that it's not about being the best or finally getting it or arriving. It's about ongoing learning, trying new things, and really coming at coaching from a beginner's mindset, which is a gift. I think that's what's part of being a really good coach. But when it comes to sales and marketing and really putting yourself out there, it can often be our biggest curse and it can often be our biggest limiting factor because it gets easy to get into that thinking of, I'm not good enough, I need to take the next certification, or I don't have as many followers as somebody. I'm not as advanced as somebody else. And I have no business teaching this because there's someone else that teaches this. This is real feelings that a lot of my clients experience. And in truth, what I experience. I'll tell you a story. Just the other day when I first, you know, really just dove into this work. One of my mentor, one of my mentors, many mentors, honestly, I have three that I go to. One of my many mentors is James Wedmore. And I'm part of his coaching mastermind, essentially. And I was listening to one of his phone, one of his calls. He was doing an eight hour to know James is to love him, but he did an eight hour coaching on the sales page on just one component. He taught eight hour course on how to rate a sales page. I was listening to it and honestly, I love James. He is a 10. In fact, if you have talked to me at all, honestly, I love James and there's no way you can talk to me without me referencing him and his coaching because he's been a huge influencer my life in my messaging. He's had a huge impact on me. Someday we'll get him on the podcast. So he was teaching this eight hour course and I usually just eat everything up that he's saying with the spoon. I just love. I always feel inspired after I talk to him. I feel awesome. This time I didn't. And it was the only time I didn't feel awesome. And it was because I knew that I was making this shift to into marketing. And so I texted him and I said, so I DM'd him and I said to him, james. And I was crying at this point as I'm writing it. And I said, james, sometimes I feel like I'm doing my clients a disservice by learning from me when they can learn from you. And it was hard for me to write that, but I really did feel that he responded and he said, beverly, I can't do this alone. Don't look at us as competitors. I'm reading the text right now. But rather as an extension of each other, Use what you learn from me and pass it on. Your people will resonate with you. I read that and said, thanks, coach, you're the very best. But it inspired me because the second that I acknowledged it and said it out loud, first of all, I'm glad that I did because I if I can't get, I'm an extrovert and so I need to process on the outside of me and with other people. So the fact that I could say it to him and be honest helps me process it to move through it. But it also was a huge reminder for me that because it's something I tell my clients all the time and I've noticed this even as a trainer, that's like saying only one person in this world can be a trainer. That's just not the case. I can share a story using the exact same wording as you, but it's going to resonate different with your people when you tell it. It's going to resonate different with my people when I tell it. And also we talk about this all the Time. Even though. And also consider that even though we're all humans, if not the same, our skeletal system is very similar, but we look completely different on the outside and we function completely different on the inside. So since that's true, what's causing us to think that one person is going to resonate with all 8 billion unique individuals? Plus, you and me can go and experience the exact same external circumstance. We could go to the grocery store together. We could do every single experience the same. But given our own internal context and our own internal experience, we're going to tell the story of what happened very differently. So it's not a matter of being the best. It's not a matter of having a million 360,000 kajillion followers. It's not a matter of having a ripped six pack and being able to maintain that all year. It's not a matter of having all these awards and accolades that show you're the best. It is a matter of connecting with your ideal client and being able to demonstrate that you can change your client's life. That's it. It's easy to get into. There's someone else who's doing it better than me, and I have no place in teaching that. But think about it. But you just need to be one step ahead of your ideal client, first of all. And second of all, with a service heart, with the intention to help and serve your client. That's really all unique because think about it. Would you want to learn how to swim in an ocean with live water? Because just think about it. And here's a metaphor for you. If you were learning how to swim for the very first time, would you consider, I mean, maybe you would, but chances are you're probably not going to hire the teacher that's about to take you into the ocean with high tides, open water, live water, and teaching you how to swim in the ocean, probably not. You're probably not going to hire the coach. So it's not a matter of being the best. It's a matter of having the intention and being able to demonstrate that you can change your client's life. Think about it. If it was only about you, and then here's another metaphor for you. Because if it was only about you and you were only able to to teach someone what you have done or what you have gone through, then does that mean that a personal trainer can only train their same gender? Does that mean that a personal trainer can only train someone that they've experienced, that they've gone through? I look at actors. Does that mean that an actor can't play a role of someone who's been shot unless they've been shot? Does that mean that an actor can't play a role of someone who's living in Africa or living in a different country unless they've lived in that country? No, probably not. Of course not. Because it's not about the actor, it's not about the trainer, it's about the client. And when you can approach your work from a place of what can I do for my client today? How can I serve my client? How can I help my client client get to the next level or achieve the goal? The rest of the stuff won't matter. It won't matter if you have a six pack or visible abs. Your client might not even want that. Your client cares more about what's in it for me than they do about how you look, what your certifications are, how smart you are, how well you're perceived in the, in the industry. Your client cares about what's in it for me, what's the success, what are my takeaways that I can take away? And then the third way to overcome imposter syndrome. Here we go. We're going to get into a little bit of woo and this stuff can be a little bit uncomfortable, but it's really important and it's self esteem, self worth. I think it goes back to part of being a good coach, the curse of the good coach of coming from a beginner's mindset, which I think is imperative, but you need to look and you need to spend some time and ask yourself is this Because I think that having that curse of the good coach is really important coming from this place of beginners mindset. As long as you're checking in with self worth and self esteem, are you trying to reach that next certification because you need to prove yourself? Do you feel that you are not worthy? When will you know that you're going to be? When will you know if you're worthy? Now talking about this stuff is typically what most people don't want to talk about. They're like, oh, this is not important. I'm just going to click off, I don't want to talk about it. But the truth of the matter is that it is the most important thing. It's something I used to teach even in weight loss. Transformation is coming from a place of loving yourself, loving your body, which most people, it's uncomfortable. This work is uncomfortable. The truth is the same business. Think about it. Look, take a look at the people that you find to be very successful people that you look up to, chances are they have a deep conviction and I'm not talking about arrogance. They have a very deep conviction on what it is that they are trying to put out in the world. And it's not coming from a place. Now, you can be humble, you can still practice humility, but be confident in what it is that you're sharing. You can still have that beginner's mindset, but still have conviction and self worth and self esteem and not doubt yourself every step of the way. I'm not talking about being dogmatic and righteous. I mean, I look at my work and sometimes I cringe. I still have moments of being cringy. When I first started, you know, even entering the online world and first started talking about pre postnatal health and this was back before I. This was back before I even specialized and really started to study biomechanics. I had tons of certifications that I would hide behind, but I didn't really understand it until much later. But oh my gosh, sometimes I cringe thinking about, thinking about things that I said or things that I posted. Right. I'm not, I'm not talking about being right. I recognize all the time, oh, I was wrong there. I thought I was right. I thought that I was sharing good information at the time. But turns out I learned a lesson. It's okay. That's a good thing. I said this. I can't remember if I've said this on the podcast yet, but I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it is that people want to succeed and they want to succeed as fast as possible. But the truth is that you want to get your lessons. You want to fail faster. Because when you fail or when you're wrong or when you make a mistake, you're going to learn from that. People don't tend to learn from their successes. They learn from their missteps. You might have noticed that I tend not to say the word failure. I don't like that word because I don't believe in failure. Really. You're only going to get the lesson that you need or the success that you want. I shared today in one of my groups about how I'm so grateful for all the things that happened in 2018 and 2019, all those struggles, because I know for a fact that I wouldn't be here today without them. So that's going to lead me into number four. But before I leave this point, and I think that I'm not really going into it because I get that it can be icky and uncomfortable, but it's something that you need to spend time with. It's a book that I bought for a couple of my clients. It's called Love yourself like your life depended on it. It's a short 45 minute read. But the practice is powerful. And when you can practice humility from a place of self confidence and self worth, you'll give yourself the permission to be wrong. Because it's not about being right, it's about serving your client. And when you come from that place, when you work from that place, you'll be able to move through imposter syndrome because you'll be showing up, giving yourself permission to be wrong and showing up for your people because that's what they need. And then the fifth step, and I did kind of allude to it when I was talking about the fourth, but is gratitude. And I know you hear people say it all the time, have gratitude, practice, gratitude, I get it. And you might be thinking, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm grateful. But it's easy to say that you're grateful, but really think about it and look at it. Are you coming from a place where you can say this is happening for me, not to me, and really get present to the things that you are grateful for. Every failed launch that I've had, and I have had many, every zero dollar earning launch that I've made, I'm grateful for. Because I would not be here teaching you, helping you get past the mistakes that I made, helping you get through the mistakes that I made faster without it. That's why I am grateful for my failures or my lessons every day. And it's easy to get into, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, Beverly, I get it. I'm grateful, I'm grateful. But. But this is just really awful right now. Believe me, I get it. I just shared today. 2018 and 2019 were some of the hardest years of my life, both personally and in finances. Last summer my husband and I were driving back from Michigan. It was 1:00am, we were somewhere in Ohio and he knocks on my window and he says, beverly, I'm not sure if we have enough room on our credit card to fill the car with gas. And I said, we'll try. Anyway, I get choked up when I say that story because it's almost a year later and things have completely shifted. So if you're at the beginning and honestly, in less than a year things have gone completely the other way. We are now in a profit. We've now not only paid off our personal Debt, we are in a profit margin in less than a year. So if you're here and you're listening to this and you're thinking, I've got so long to go, or I'm right at the beginning, I'm never going to be there, things can change in a dime. And overcoming that imposter syndrome is going to be one of the things you need to move through in order to get to the other side. So just a quick recap on how to overcome that feeling of imposter syndrome. This is what we talked about today. We talked about, number one was recognizing that fear of judgment and moving through it, and moving through it by thinking it and moving through it by giving yourself permission to not be perfect. That was number one. Number two, just being one step ahead of your ideal client. It's not about being the best, it's about serving your ideal client. And number three, working from a place of self, self worth and self love. Really just getting present to knowing where you are on that you can both be humble, but come from a place of love and knowing that you are worthy just because you are. And sometimes, and I didn't talk about this, and I will do a whole other podcast on this, but sometimes we associate our self worth to our confidence. Confidence oftentimes comes from competence. Knowing that you can do something that's actually not attached to your self worth, you're worthy. Just because you are doesn't mean that you achieved something. Not because you achieved something or because you did something. I always go to your baby. When you hold your baby for the first time, are you going to say, do you say to your baby, I'll love you when you achieve something? When you get your client a success, when you get your first client? No. Are you going to tell that baby you'll only be worth something when you get a job? Chances are no. And number four, getting present to gratitude. Gratitude in your both your struggles, your successes and your lessons that will help you move through imposter syndrome. And when you move through imposter syndrome, you'll be able to help more people. So if you like this podcast, it would be a huge favor to us if you would please, please leave us a review. But be sure to take a screenshot of it before you submit the review and send it to my team at support simpson fitness.com and we will send you a bonus Instagram podcast which will teach you how to optimize your Instagram account so you can generate your first one to five high paying clients. Thank you so much for joining me. I'll catch you on the next one. Thank you for listening to the PT Profit Podcast. If you like this episode, chances are your friends will too. So it would be a huge service to us if you would please leave us a review and share with your friends on your social media channels. When you leave us a review, be sure to take a screenshot of it and email that screenshot to my team@infovsimpsonfitness.com and we'll send you a very special Instagram podcast that will show you how to create compelling content so that your ideal clients come to you and you go from wanting clients to a wait list of clients ready for your services. Thank you so much for listening and we'll see you on the next episode.