The Power Of Yes With Gavin McHale

You're listening to the PT Profit podcast, episode number 160. Today I'm sitting down with Gavin McHale and we're talking all about the power of yes.

Are you ready? Let's get started.

Hi, I'm Beverly Simpson, former fitness manager turned online personal training business owner. And this podcast is where smart fitness professionals, including trainers and clinicians, discover how to increase client performance in movement, package and position their products and services and get out of their own way way so that they can increase their revenue to live a life that they love without sleazy sales. Welcome to the PT Profit Podcast. What's up, coach? Thank you so much for pushing Play on another episode of the PT Profit Podcast. I'm your host, Beverly Simpson, and if.

This is the first time you're hanging out with me today, thank you so much for pushing play.

I'm super pumped to dive in today's episode.

Honestly, it was so fun to record and we talked a lot about the.

Importance of saying yes, how it impacts you in terms of the decisions that you make now and how it has a long term compounding effect. Gavin shared the importance of working on.

You, you as the business owner, you.

As the CEO, you as the coach and the trainer. His development has had an impact on him, on his business, and also for his clients. And in today's episode, he's going to share a very powerful story about how he got to play in an NHL hockey game.

And it was such an incredible, breathtaking story and I can't wait for you to dive in.

So without further ado, let's go ahead.

And roll that interview. What's up, Gavin? Thanks so much for joining me here on the show today. How are you?

I'm great. Thank you for your patience on letting me get set up and look good and well, I don't know if I look that good, but sound good.

You sound and look sensation. Don't even worry about it.

Thank you.

Great. So I'd love to just go ahead and dive in. I'm really excited for what we have planned for, for all of you today. So, Gavin, just for some context, please will you share with us a little bit about who you are, who you serve and how you got there.

Who am I? Oh, man. Well, I, I like to call, I like to call myself a personal development coach. I guess more traditionally we look at it as a business coach, particularly for fitness business owners. I was in the fitness industry. I was a personal trainer. I graduated with a degree in kinesiology. Personal trainer nearly 10 years. And as I was dabbling in the business coaching space and trying to build my own personal training business. I had several awesome coaches and recognized that it was more than what I thought it was. I thought, give me all the Instagram tactics and give me all the sales strategies. Um, but I don't want to work on myself. I don't want to improve myself. You know, it's the same as in that personal training world. Like, give me all the workouts and the, you know, and the ma. The macros and the meal plan. But I don't want to change who I am. Right. Um, and so, in having that experience and really learning firsthand, like, you know, when I had that breakthrough and recognized that this was about more than that, I recognize that. Wow. Like, there are a lot of people out here in this industry working their butts off and not making the money that they should be and not having the lifestyle that they should be, simply because they are kind of stuck in this, what they're supposed to be as personal trainers. And so I decided to make the shift and start helping them. And then Covid just decided to tell me, you're done in the gym. You're not doing that anymore. And so we dove in, and that was right when trainers needed a lot of help. So we were able to help them. And now here we are.

Yeah. That's amazing. Okay. And you also wrote in the notes, and this is clearly not going to be the majority of our show, but I'm just curious, can you please tell me about your NHL playing hockey story?

Yes. Well, you can see my jersey back here.

I can.

Okay, so this is. This is the jersey, and I'm just going to tease it out for you here, Bev. So right here. Hold on. I'm going to move for a second right there. I don't know if you can see that. Okay, that's an Alex Ovechkin signed game. Use stick. I don't know if anyone's a hockey fan. Alex Ovechkin is probably in the next two to three years, going to take over as the greatest goal scorer of all time. So that's a little tidbit for you. I'll keep this story somewhat short. So I live in Winnipeg, Canada, and recent. Well, 10 years ago, we got our NHL team back, the Winnipeg jets, about five. Well, maybe seven, six. Seven years ago, they were having this issue in the NHL where if there's two goalies on each team, if the starting goalie got hurt and the backup goalie got hurt, they didn't have a plan. So There were moments where a coach would go in net or a player would put goalie equipment on. And if anyone knows hockey, it's a very different position to play defense or forward than goalie. And they thought, we can't have this. So they implemented a rule called the emergency backup rule, which means every single rink in the NHL would have a goalie who is ready to go, ready to play for both teams if they needed to. This goalie needed to be an amateur. They couldn't be paid because it would go against the salary cap. And essentially, they just had to be there and be ready. So I got. I was lucky enough. Winnipeg's a relatively small world, and the hockey community is even smaller. So I was lucky enough to be contacted and I was. Became an emergency backup goalie for the Winnipeg Arena, I guess, the Jets. And it's really cool. You got to bring a guest. You got to sit in the press box, you got to eat the press box meal, you know, free, free tickets to it to an NHL hockey game. Great.

That's cool. Are you required to be at every game?

So there's about. In Winnipeg, there's about six of us, and we'd rotate through, and she, you know, the person would send out the schedule for the month, and we'd pick our games. Right. Um, and so I was. You know, 2018 rolls around the season, and it's November, and I said, the schedule came out, and I chose the defending Stanley cup champions. I'm like, I want to go see the Washington Capitals play. This will be awesome. So the Capitals are in town against the Jets. This is sweet. So it's a Wednesday. It's a Wednesday. And I'm. You know, usually the way it goes is you essentially, you do your normal day of life, and then you show up an hour early to the rink and you eat the meal and, you know, you watch the game and you. The only thing is you had to have your equipment in your vehicle, you know, down on the ramp. So here we are. It's. I get up at 5am I'm a personal trainer. I work all day. I go and I'm coaching at the university. I coach the goalies on the women's hockey team at the time. And I get off the ice, and my phone has tons of missed calls from a random number that I have no idea what it is, and missed texts. I'm like, what the hell is this? So I open it up, and it's literally the goalie coach for the Washington Capitals has texted me. He's like, this is so and so with the Washington Capitals. Looks like we're going to need you tonight. Can you call me back? And I'm like, is this a joke? So I run outside, I grabbed my phone, I call him and he's like, yeah, you know Braden Holpe, who's their starting goalie? He's sick. He couldn't do morning skate. Like, we need you. And so the game's at seven. At this point. It's five. Okay. Generally it's. You usually get to a hockey game an hour and a half to two hours early because warm up is at 6:30 and all this stuff. So it's 5 o'. Clock. I'm in the south end of the city. I've got to get downtown on a Jets game, so I'm literally jumping my car. Luckily, my wife, well, fiance at the time, actually girlfriend at the time, she was on campus as well for something else. So I got to go see her and tell her that this was happening. So she was so pumped. And my guest for the evening was my mom. So I was meeting my mom to pick her up and take her downtown. And I call her and I'm like, I'm not taking you downtown. I'm playing. And luckily, the jets were amazing about this. They called me. This is all in a 15 minute period. They call me and they're like, we hear your plane. We want to invite both your parents to come to the rink and they can come sit in the press box and watch the game. So I call my mom. I'm like, we got to get a hold of dad. At this point, my dad doesn't have a cell phone and he's super excited about his bachelor night, going out to get dinner and all this stuff. So my mom and I can't get ahold of him. We're calling like crazy. So I'm like in traffic, weaving in and out, trying to get ahold of my parents. Luckily, I talked to my mom. I said, just go back home and pick dad up. Like, we'll figure it out. Here's where you have to go and all this stuff. I finally get ahold of my dad as I'm pulling onto the ramp where I park, literally for an NHL game. And I'm like, dad, get your boots on. Like, come on, let's go. I'm. I'm playing and he's so excited. So my mom picks him up and they come and I literally, I put my gear on my shoulder. I have this old ratty hockey bag and like, all this stuff. I walk in to the basement. The jets, my opponent for that night, are, like, warming up, and they're like, what the hell is this? Like, who is this guy walking in, walking in with his gear? I walk to the. It's amazing. It's like. It's. It's like, you can't even write this stuff. I know. Okay, so I walk over to the visitor side. Like, I walk past the jets, like, hey, guys. You know, they're like, what is going on? And. And Alex Ovechkin and, like, a couple of other players are standing there, hands out, ready to shake my hand, and he's like, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you. Like, I know who you are, man. Like, you know, and. And then. And then there we are. Like, I get whisked away. I, you know, I show up, I walk in the room, the guys are like, this is a hilarious story. I'm like, you know, the random dude.

They're probably. What the effing is.

They're like, what is happening? I got to get, like, a physical. I got to sign a contract. So I have, like, 20 minutes to do all this. Then I have to get all my equipment on, and then I have to go and, like, warm up for an NHL game. Okay? So I get. I get all my gear on. I put. I put this jersey on, which is like a moment in itself. It's crazy. I go out on the ice, step out on the ice, like the hometown rink where I, you know, I'm a season ticket holder at this time. Like, I, you know, I could be in the stands, right? It's ridiculous. My. My future brother in law, huge hockey fan. He's. I knew he was in the stands because my wife had told him, like, hey, get to the game early. Gavs playing. Like, take pictures, you know, do your thing. And. Yeah, so I'm out for warm up. First shot is Alex Ovechkin, this, like, future hall of Famer. I'm not even close to the puck. Like, I look like a complete idiot. Anyway, I get a few shots. I maybe stop a couple. I think there's a couple of puck marks on this jersey. All the jets players are like, who is this person? Like, this random guy, right? And ended up, like, I didn't end up actually playing. So I just. I watched the game from, you know, from the sidelines as I have my hat on and my jersey, and all the fans behind me are figuring out what's happening as the game's going on, and they're like, hey, who played then?

If you didn't play.

Okay, so they're starting goalie was. Was unable to play. Their backup ended up playing. Crazy thing that I learned after the game, he actually cramped up. Halfway through the third period, he cramped up. I didn't know. He didn't tell anybody. I think he just went to the bench and was like, I'm cramping up. I can't let this guy go in the net. It's a tie game. It's one one. And he cramped up. I don't know what would have happened. So, anyway, anyway, it was just this incredible experience. And the coolest part, I want to give a shout out. I mean, the jets allowed my parents to come and it was so cool for them. The Capitals, like, literally, they could have like, put me in another room and just been like, don't talk to anybody. They invited me into their locker room. So I'm in the locker room with all these, you know, incredible athletes who are like household names. They treated me like a teammate. They're tapping me on the pads, giving me fist bumps. Like, you know, here we go. Like, it was just amazing. Like, their coach would come in and for the meeting and he's like, hey, nice to meet you. You know, I'm just like, hey, I'm the random dude. You know, didn't. You know, and. And then, you know, the. One of the. These like full circle moments, we go to. Out to a restaurant after me and, and my girlfriend and my parents and stuff, we go out to rest because I hadn't had dinner or anything. And the waitress is like, I would have puked. Yeah. The waitress comes to our table and she's like, so, how was your night? What'd you guys get up to? And behind me, I'm on the tv. I'm on the tv. Like, they're interviewing me on the tv and I'm like, well, my night was pretty good. And like, she didn't put the pieces together like that. I was literally like playing in the game. Anyway, I think I went a little over my allotted time there, but it's a pretty cool story.

I mean, that's an amazing story. I mean, I had. I, of course I have follow up questions, but I will tie it in together because I am curious, you know, like the mental stamina. You must have had to have gotten that call and been like, okay, here we go. I mean, those are one of those invisible components that I feel oftentimes for anyone. But, you know, since we're talking to coaches here, that, that is so important, but never talked about. So I'm curious how that moment and those moments and that experience impacted you as a person and how you've been able to carry it through your business.

Yeah. So I'll tell you first, like, one of the things that a lot of people don't know, and I was telling a friend a couple weeks after this happened, I had that year started. I don't know if you've heard of the five Minute Journal, the practice of gratitude practice, the five Minute Journal. And it's basically like, you know, what would make today awesome? Or three things you're grateful for. Three things that would make today awesome. And every time that I had a game, like when I was scheduled to be the emergency backup, I always said it would be awesome to play in an NHL game tonight. So I was like, putting it out there, you know, however, woo. Woo. You think it is putting it out there in the universe that I wanted this.

We're. Woo. Over here.

Oh, good. Okay. Okay. I can, I can let my freak flag fly here.

Let it go.

So, yeah. So, you know, I was putting it out there in the universe that, that this is something I wanted. And I was also. And I think this is one of the reasons I was chosen for this is I was staying. I don't want to say, like, ready, ready for it. I was skating regularly and making sure that I was keeping up, that I was working out. Like, I was a personal trainer. So I was, I was in good shape. And I think that's one of those things that's. It's kind of hard to find when you're looking for it as the team is like someone who is still committed to the sport somewhat and is still in shape. You know, they're not drinking beers the night before or whatever. So I think putting myself in that position energetically allowed me to be able to handle that. And I think in terms of how I've taken that experience, the first thing that I take from that experience that I mentioned already is no matter what position someone's in, whether they can help you make a whole bunch of money, or they're a potential client, or they're the janitor at the gym you work at, treating them like they're a part of the family, like, treating them like a real person, I will never forget the way that those guys treated me when they easily. That organization could have. They didn't need to give me a jersey. They didn't need to do anything. They treated me so well. So just like, how. And this. Our mutual connection. Chris is a huge proponent of this like, how you make people feel and how you treat people matters more than anything. And my. My first thing when I was a personal trainer, always before anything else, was make it the best hour of their day. And if I could do that, like, I would always have a business, you know, make that personal training session the best hour of the day. So that's one of the things. And the other thing that I've carried through is what's the saying is, like, luck is when, like, opportunity meets preparation.

Preparedness.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I. I mean, this. This has happened to, like, a handful of people on the face of the planet where you work your regular job, and then you get thrust into a professional hockey game. This is like. This is like someone, you know, you're in. You're in New York. This is like someone working all day on Wall street and then getting thrown into pitch. Like, what?

I know.

Ridiculous. It's unheard of, right? So I count myself lucky. At the same time, I also know that, like, staying, as I say, like, staying within striking distance of those big, crazy goals is something that is super important, whether it's for your fitness or for your business or just for life being, like, no matter how crazy it sounds, like, what if you were ready for it? If it did happen? Like, what would happen, you know, And I don't know how ready I was, but I was at least within striking distance to be able to capture that opportunity and essentially, you know, not vomit all over the place.

I mean, at least you didn't have to go into the actual games.

Yes, I actually am thankful for that because I get to have this story, and I don't have to worry about the fact that, like, maybe I let in a goal or, like, like, lost a team. Lost the team, the game or something.

Yeah, for sure. I'm also curious, you know, you brought up the practice of journaling, so I'd love. For us, you know, because this is what we. I definitely want to dive into this component because you said a couple of things that I thought was interesting, you know, which is in the expat. And I think this is a controversial topic in our world where we're talking about, you know, staying active, doing what we say that we're gonna. That doing what we advise people to do, which is not always the same. So I think there is, like, there's a huge mental component to this, to personal training and to running a business. And it always tends to be, in my opinion, when someone starts to grow their business, that they're the first one they let Themselves go, moms do this. Parents do. And when I say let themselves go, what I mean is they, they stop letting themselves be a priority and they put everyone else's health before their own. And so you brought up the journal. And so I'm just curious, is this a practice you've continued? How have you stepped, how have you also helped people pay attention to the invisible when the buy in is not always easy?

Man, this has so many things to say here. To answer the first question is like, like, do I continue to do it? I've actually doubled down. I do it. Like, that's the majority of the work that I do is on myself. And I heard this way, way back when I was playing, I was like 15 years old playing junior hockey. Um, and it's in relation to. Because it was just men, but dance with the girl that brought you to the dance. And you know, I, I became fit, first of all, became fit when I was being active every day and, and working out and putting myself first for my hockey career. Well, I guess I shouldn't say I became fit. I stayed fit. You know, I was already fit as a kid. Um, and so putting that first. And then what I recognized was I became happier. And in my thought, like, this is. Goes hand in hand. It's not a coincidence. Also, my business became more successful when I started journaling, when I started practicing gratitude. And I will, I will say, you know, I was not always the healthiest. I was one of those people who maybe let it fall at times. And what I recognized was, you know, okay, I'd let my journaling fall off, or my meditation or gratitude practice fall off, or my own workouts fall off. And then energetically, let's go back to the woo woo. What happened? All my clients, they started falling off. And this is where it's like, it's not my fault that my clients aren't doing the things that I asked them to do, but it is my responsibility to hold up my end of the bargain, right? So what I found was the more that I worked on myself, the more that I opened up the possibility for my clients to work on themselves and for them to see that, like, this is that you can do this and that you're not weird and that I could be the example for them, right? Like, my business started growing, I was happier. My wife and I were happier. I was able to travel more. I was money, opportunities for money. And all those things started to come. Interesting how this all happens, right? But for folks like me and you, it's actually not that interesting. It's just a fact that the more that you focus on yourself, the more success is going to come to you. Matthew McConaughey says it really well in his book. I'm a huge Matthew McConaughey fan. He has a whole chapter called the Target Draws the Arrow. And so if you want to be successful, wealthy, fit, step into the identity and do the things that a successful, wealthy or fit person would do and that will come to you. I don't even know if that answered your question or if I went on a full tangent.

No, no, it does. No, it's perfect. And it's interesting too because we talk about this a lot too inside of the formula and sometimes it's, it's, it's hard in terms of, and I put, I'm saying I'm putting hard in quotations because you know, when we oftentimes, especially if you're not new to hearing the be do have model and you're thinking, you know, okay, what would 100k month you already be saying, doing, thinking and feeling. And I can always tell based on the types of challenges and questions that people will ask or say and have about their business in, in, I can sense what, where they are in their business journey in terms of their level. Because 100k month person is going to space and have different conversations, the same challenges, but it a hundred percent of the time will be talked about differently than someone who is, say from just starting. Neither are bad. This is a neutral experience. But it's not bad or good. It's just, that's an example for me at least when I can hear and see and sense the difference. Because just based on how people describe their challenges and problems. So what's the process that you would carry someone through to help them step into a version of themselves that seems so far like Mount Everest?

Oh man. I have two main, two main thoughts here. So the, the first one is I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna make some notes here so that I don't forget this because sometimes I get these really great ideas and then I forget them. So the first thing is I heard this from one of my mentors coaches one time and it stuck with me for a long time is the more often that he said, the more often that I can bring in the best version of myself. We talked about it as the rocking chair version of myself. The all knowing, wise, 75 year old version who's just sitting on the rocking chair and has experienced everything. The more often that I can bring that person into My discussions and conversations and say, hey, what would you do? Or what would you say in this situation? And literally coach myself. Because we all actually already know what we need to do. We actually have that within ourselves already. We know what we need to do to be the healthiest version of ourselves. We know what we need to do to be the happiest version of ourselves. We know what we need to do to be the wealthiest version of ourselves. We just block it by thinking that it's something different or we know how we need to be. So the more often you can open up and allow that into the conversation. It's funny how these answers will show up, you know, and there is no wrong answer either. If you're just sitting there and allowing. So that's the first thing is like if you want to be. You kind of said it like, if you want to be 100k a month business owner, if you want to be more shredded than you are now, bring that person into the conversation. You know, ask them like, hey, what's the habit that I need to. That I need to change? Or what's the lifestyle that I need to be living? Or what is the action? What's the decision I would make in this situation? And to that end, the next point that I would make is when we have these. You said these Mount Everest type things. Let's say you're at 5k a month right now and 15k a month feels like Mount Everest. I got so many things I need to do. I'm already busy. I'm already. I can't handle it. Right. Well, it's great to have that end game, that end goal, that or not even end goal, but that next step, right? Let's say it's 15k or even in your example, let's say it's 100k a month. What I've found to be really successful is we take that goal. So that outcome, which when it's an outcome goal, we don't always have control over if that's going to happen, right? Like a client could eat perfectly and work out perfectly and rest and do everything right and still not lose that £20 for whatever reason. Maybe they had a stressful week or whatever. A coach could literally have the best marketing and the best sales and the best delivery and still not hit that hundred K in the specified time because there's parts of that that are outside of your control. The last person on the sales call could say, nah, I'm good, I don't have the money right now. Right? And you don't have control over that. So we set this outcome goal, okay? That's Mount Everest. The only thing that that outcome goal is good for, the only reason why that is, in my opinion, why that is a good thing is because it gives us an idea of the action steps required to get there, of the processes required to get to said goal. So what I'll often say to my clients for a 90 day planning set your goal. We call them adventures because it's a little more fun. Set your adventure. We also say, well, why, why do you care about this? Like, why does it matter to you? Right? Because I know for me, I don't know about you, but I have done a lot of times in my life I have set goals. Cause I thought I was supposed to because I thought that's what my coach said, that I should want to make six figures. So I guess I want to make six figures, even though I didn't really know why. So why is it important to you? Why does it really matter that you get from 5k to 15k and when you figure that out, now you actually have the motivation behind it. So why. And then what are three action steps or however many action steps you want to put? We often like to go, like, what's something you could do, you know, in. In three weeks, in two weeks, in one week and 72 hours, 48 hours, 24 hours. Now what are the action steps? Um, and what's the next indicated step? So what's the next thing? Cause that's the only thing you can do is the next thing. And then most importantly, cross out or remove the end goal. Because it doesn't matter. Just do the action steps. You know, actually the first person I learned be do have from was. I don't know if you've heard of Alex Hormozi. And yeah, of course, I hope so. And he said like in the, in the be do have, he said like the amount of money that you make or any of that, it doesn't matter. All that matters is that you take the right actions, that you do the things and become the person who is at that level.

Yeah. So it's so true. So good. And we, of course, and we work similarly in that way. I think that that is, you know, I think that's really powerful. And I think that one of the things that one of my mentors talks about, which I talk a lot about too, is the razor's edge, is that when it comes to outcomes and goal setting is that we have to care about everything and nothing at the same Time, which is very challenging to do. It is exactly it. And that's like saying, oh, this is how you lose £300. I can tell you how to do that in an hour, but that doesn't mean you're going to do it in an hour.

Yeah, yeah. And like, it's the way you say that. Right. Like every, like how you do one thing is how you do everything. Right. Like everything matters. If you, you know, if you make your bed, if you, if you, you know, care about the, the way that your house looks and all these things. Like, and at the same time, yeah. Like, you can't be focused on like, oh, well, if I make my bed, then I'll make 100k a month. Right. Like, you can't. It's like, it's like, oh, I just make my bed to make my bed. Yet we know that how you do one thing is how you do everything. It's like, it's such a paradox where you've got to be so laser focused on the goal and at the same time totally removed from it.

Let it go. Exactly. And then also too, a lot of people, a lot of people, I find when they're not focused on the personal component, the personal components of business. And this is why, you know, I heard this on a live once from one of my friends and I love her and I 100% agree is, it's, it's kind of this idea of business is personal. So when people tell you, oh, it's business, it's not personal. If you, I hope it's personal. If you're building a personal training business.

Yeah.

And I have not, I have yet to meet a single person who doesn't care about the people that they're working with. So.

Yeah.

Anyway, all that to say is that when you're not focused on the personal, the you as the personal trainer components, people tend to take a lot of action that I would describe as being in the round room. Like, you're in the round room, you're looking for the corner.

So good.

And the act, you know, people will take action from their current paradigm instead of the paradigm that they want to be in, which is that is. Can be a life work.

And this is why I've seen this so many times. I was actually, I totally fell into this trap. So I'm, you know, I'm working with a coach and I'm building my business and I was hitting like, I was doing well. I was hitting like 8 to 10k months every month. Things are, this is great. This is awesome. This is what I wanted, right? But I want to get to 15 to 20k months. Cool. So I have a month where I hit 15k and then I have another month where I hit 15k and I go, this is crazy. This is crazy. It'll probably come back down to normal soon. What? This is what you wanted the normal to be, But I didn't have. I guess you could call it. I didn't have the tools. I didn't have the ability yet to handle that amount of money coming to me, right? So that the ego, the subconscious, the protective mechanism was deadly afraid. And it was like, let's get the hell out of this situation and go back to what's comfortable. Even though consciously the only thing that I was saying to anybody was 15k, 20k months. I want 15. 20k months. 15. But my subconscious, the part that actually drives the bus that I did, I wasn't aware of, or that, you know, the new levels, new Devils, I wasn't aware of that devil yet was going, no, no, no. This is totally unsafe. This is, you know, you. You got to get back to, like. Like you said, you got to get back to the 8K room where it's. Where it's safe and we're okay and we. We know all the people there because when you're in the 15-20k room, it's. It's scary. There's totally new people in there. It's. It's, you know, it's way hotter. It's. It's like. It's just way different, right? And. And like you said, and this comes back full story, full circle to the, to my hockey story is like, if I saw my. And that was a crazy situation, right? But if I saw myself as just some Joe Schmo schlub, that was not a very good goalie, it would have been very different than, like, I know. I mean, I know I'm not an NHL goalie. I'll be hands up, very clear. I know I'm not at that level, but, hey, I'm a good goalie. Like, I'm okay. I can. I can. I can figure it out for 15 minutes if I have to. You know, it's like. And when you start coming from that perspective is like, okay, well, what. How would I act if I was 100k a month coach? How would I act if I was a healthy person? How would I act if I was. If I did identify as a fit person who exercises regularly? Now, when that happens and that comes to be, you're like, yeah, this is who I am. Who is it who said, I practiced every shot a thousand times before I took it? Like, I've already been doing this. This is already who I am. And that's where the. This true science of visualization and of the imagination actually starts to make sense. Is like our brain, when you tell it that you are wealthy and you. You know, you have everything you want, it's. Can't tell the difference between that and quote, unquote, real life.

Yes. I mean, there's a reason why some coaches don't let their rehabbing athletes watch the game.

Yeah.

So.

Yeah.

So, you know, there's something you said that's so funny or not funny, but I used to say it all the time. The new level, new devil. And I think for me, what it really. What I realized I had this moment of, no, no, it's not a new devil. It's new level, same devil with the dang dress on.

Right.

It's like. What I mean by that is, you know, these neural pathways in your brain, they stay. They never go away. It's just a matter of you consistently choosing right instead of going left when the next challenge comes.

Because, right.

It's. It's like. And you'll see this too, as a coach with your clients. It's. It's this moment of, oh, when. When I lose ten pounds, then I'll do X. If I do this, then I'll have. But that's backwards, right? Because I'll never forget that moment of consistently hitting the 20k months. And you have this, like, sinking. At least I did. I don't know about you, but for me, I had this sinking feeling of like, oh, my gosh, nothing's really changed. The challenges just faced the same as when I was hitting 2K.

Then I had that when I first. I'll never forget staring at the computer screen when I first hit, you know, a six figure, like $8333 in a month. And I thought that was the only thing I ever wanted. And I was super excited. I went and told my girlfriend, look, look, look at this. Like, And. And then nothing changed. And I was like, I thought. I thought this was going to be. Where's the ticker tape parade? What happened? Right? And it's like, you're so right. When we think that that will make me happy or that will change everything, that's taking away our ability to internally already be happy. And again, this is another paradox. Only when you let go of the need for money or the need for validation for being a Certain weight is when you can open yourself up to receive it. And maybe I don't know if you can get your producer to just put that on repeat, because it doesn't. I still think that it's landing for me and I still think it's probably landing for a lot of people. You can think about that for so long and it won't land where it's like, I am already enough. I am already worthy. I am already happy. The amount of money I have or the way that people talk about my body or the amount of weight I can lift does not change that. And when you recognize that, that's when you can truly release yourself from the, from the jaws of, you know, thinking that you're gonna have something different. When you get something different, it's all within you already. You already have it.

Yeah. Do you have children?

I have a cat who may as well be my. My child. Want children? Don't. Not. Not there yet.

Sure, sure. So, you know, no one holds their cat for the first time or their dog or their baby and thinks, man, I'm gonna love you so much when you make your 10k month. Right. You know, I can't wait to love you when you finally, you know, make something worth it in this world. Right. Says no one ever.

Yeah.

And yet we don't give ourselves the same grace.

Such a great point. Like, and man, I've. I was just camping with a three and a half year old and a two and a half month old, my nephews. You can learn so much from just looking at, watching kids, especially those like under five, when they haven't been socially conditioned yet. They're like, there's so much freedom there. They, they can't, they don't have the skill to necessarily process and understand their emotions, but they feel them. They, there's just unconditional happiness and love. Right. And, and yeah, like you said that you as a parent or even as an uncle or auntie feel unconditional love and then you recognize like, oh, like that's. And this. I had a friend of mine on my podcast and, and he said, I don't know how. Woo woo. We're willing to get. But when you realize that we are all just pure love, that and like nothing outside of us will change that, then you truly can have freedom. And I was like, that's one of the most woo woo things anyone's ever said on our podcast. And one of them and probably the most true and most real thing.

Well, love is the highest frequency. Frequency, energetic, frequency that on this planet.

And so to get back to, to what we're talking about is like how can you come from a place of unconditional love and acceptance of yourself? That, I mean, that's where we build a business and a life that is truly fulfilling.

Yeah. I mean, and listen, we're talking about this from a 30,000 foot view. So if you're listening to this podcast and thinking, yeah, but generational trauma, big T trauma, little T trauma, that's not to negate that or to over or to glass over that. Like we know that that's there that we're just talking about, you know, surface level, what you can start working on now.

Yeah. And in fact that, that just shines a light on that work and that, that is the work. Like if you haven't looked at your stories and the beliefs and like you said, the traumas that are, that are running the show, for lack of a better term, they're running the show. And you know, let's say your 6 year old had a trauma and is scared and you haven't addressed that. And I'm not saying address it just so you can move past it, like addressed it and shown love and allowed that feeling to come to the surface and allowed that to be heard and seen. If you don't address that, then that six year old is driving the bus. That six year old is running your life. Six year olds should not be driving the bus. Okay, When I was a six year old, I was a complete disaster, all right? And I just hung out with a nearly four year old. He does not have the skills to drive anything, even a bike.

I have, My daughter is 6 and I'm laughing.

There we go. There we go. Yeah, right? So it's like, it's like allow yourself to do that work so that you can say to the six year old version of yourself, hey, you can go play, you can go do fun stuff. I'll drive the bus, I'll run this business. I'll, you know, I'll heal myself. I got this. You don't have to go, go do your thing. Right. That's when like, like you said, like, and that, it just highlights that work. It highlights the importance of doing that so that you can truly like, I mean, if you got a six year old running the show, you're probably not going to be that successful. Six year olds have no clue what they're doing, which is the best. That's awesome.

It's so true. Let them do six. Okay. Gavin, this has been amazing and you have been so generous and Pouring into the community. So I'd love for you. I want to, I really want to be respectful of your time. So can you share with us what are some of the best places that we can connect with you? Should we want to work with you or learn more about you and hang out with you?

Yeah, it's interesting. I had someone ask me this last week, two weeks ago, and I was like, is it bad if I say, I don't know.

We can always update the show notes.

Cool.

Show notes are updateable.

I have, I have a bit of a love hate relationship with Instagram right now. So I'm not as active as I have been. I'm still active. So if you were to message me there at Gavin McHale 1, I'm not going to say that you're going to see a whole bunch of stuff coming from me of content because I'm really focused right now on, we've got a group of our. We got 12 clients who are just crushing the game right now. And we're focused on them, not overly focused on creating content, things like that. But I love to talk to folks. So Instagram or you know what? Old school. Send me an email. Gavinmckhalemail.com Send me an email. One of the things that I know I was lucky enough to have was I sent some people who I didn't think would ever respond emails, like random emails or Facebook messages or Instagram messages. And, and a lot of them responded.

I still do that.

Yeah, like, hey, like, what's up? Like, let's, you know, let's chat a couple people. I won't name names, but a couple people were like, yeah, it's, you know, $400 to jump on a call. And I was like, oh, that kind of sucks that you did that. You know, that being said, I understand time is important, but one of the things that I've realized is we all at Bev Yuga prices and we all stand on the shoulders of giants. Like, none of us got here on our own. I'm not saying I'm a giant, but if you wanted to talk to someone, actually, I am quite tall. But if you wanted to talk to someone who's. Who's further ahead, you know, who's further ahead and maybe can give you a different perspective or whatever. I think that's what's the best part about how small the world is nowadays with social media.

Oh, so you could have, at the game, you could have just laid down and gone like this and then stretched across.

I tried to do that throughout my playing career. I thought that would work. It didn't work as well as I hoped it would.

All right, Gavin, we'll make sure that we link all of that up in the show notes. So thanks so much for hanging out with me today. I really appreciate it.

Thanks for having me. Thanks for having me over.

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