Using NLP to Rewire the Brain and Transform Health and Business with Megan Blacksmith

You're listening to the PT Profit podcast, episode number 303. Today, Beverly is talking to Megan Blacksmith about using NLP to rewire the brain and transform health and business. Are you ready? Let's get started.

Hi, I'm Beverly Simpson, former fitness manager turned online personal training business owner. And this podcast is where smart fitness professionals, including trainers and clinicians, discover how to increase client performance and movement, package and position their products and services and get out of their own way so that they can increase their revenue to live a life that they love without sleazy sales. Welcome to the PT Profit Podcast.

Megan Blacksmith is co founder of Zesty and she shares her journey from focusing on women's hormone health to diving deep into the power of the subconscious mind and nlp. She explains how she discovered the profound impact of subconscious reprogramming and hypnosis on her own health and how it led her to help others overcome physical ailments and limiting beliefs. Megan discusses the importance of intuition and how to tap into it, as well as the role of NLP in behavior change. She also explores the concept of radical honesty, honesty and the power of communication in relationships. It's a really good episode. You're going to enjoy it. If you enjoy the PT Profit Podcast, please leave a five star review on Apple Podcasts or your favorite listening platform. And without further ado, let's get started.

And welcome to the show. How are you doing?

I am so great. Thank you for having me.

I am super excited to get in today. I know that we have been going back and forth worth on trying to get this. I would trying to get this show on the actual podcast for what feels like a year. So I'm really excited to dive in today.

Me too. I'm. I'm glad you know the schedules, the schedules and stars have aligned.

I know, I love it. Okay, so for those of you who do not have the. The pleasure of or been introduced to the pleasure of your work, can you please share with us a little bit about who you are, who, who you serve and how you got there?

Absolutely. So I, I will say we often throughout this podcast and it's, it's not the little mouse in my pocket. I do have a business partner, Dr. Alex, so we together make up a company. Our company is called Zesty and we've been through quite a few iterations because I don't know if you're into human design, Beverly, but I'm a manifesting generator. You're into it. Okay. And I. You do. Okay. So I have to, I have to change often. Change my mind often.

What's your profile?

I'm a six two.

I'm a one three.

I love it. So once I've embraced that, we always, we, when we name our programs and things, we're like, we'll keep it a little bit vague because you never know what's going to happen, where we're gonna go. What's Dr. Alex? She's a, she's a 6:2 projector. Yes. Yep. Wow.

For those of you who don't know human design, first of all, I'll link up the episode that I did with Lauren who is a human design expert who did my profile. She's incredible. But what we'll tell you from projector energy is that they need restoration a lot when they're around us. Many generators and generators, absolutely.

Yes. She, she amplifies. We amplify each other. It's, it's quite the combo when we. So we actually do seven day live events now we do seven day certification training. It's a lot of energy for her and as long as I'm sitting up there and we're together, she kind of uses, uses the generator energy and she's, she's the visionary though. So we have, it's a, it's an amazing combination for our company. So she brings in the vision and then I do some of the things underneath that. So it's pret. Pretty cool.

I love it. Okay. Sorry I interrupted. Keep going.

Oh, it's all good. So all that to say we started in, we started in women's hormone health, focusing specifically on, you know, women who are having struggle, struggles with their cycles and really got deep into that functional medicine was the background of that. We were using the Dutch test and neurotransmitter testing and loved all that came with that. The lifestyle changes, et cetera. And over time we started to see patterns of people and who we're doing. I'm going to do air quotes. All the things Beverly. Right. Like they're willing, they're willing to do anything you say. It's like, just give me the plan. Like whatever it is, I'll do it. And this category, people, we kept finding us because it usually was people who had been to 10 doctors. Right. And it just didn't line up. It didn't line up. And I was going through some personal struggles and just personal relationship life struggles. And I found the world of nlp, neuro, linguistic programming and subconscious reprogramming and hypnosis. And that had completely shifted my, what was going on in my My personal health to the point that I had like these, this skin, my skin would hurt, my head would hurt and I would, I would be sick like every maybe six weeks. And I really do think it was, I was like, okay, it's the viruses, it's mold. I had all these different things I was blaming and, but I had done like, I had done the functional medicine protocols, I had done the testing, I had the sauna, I had the binders, I had, you know, I'd done all that. And it wasn't until I found the work of kind of like really digging deeper into what was going on, my subconscious mind. And I found there were all these patterns of like, it's not safe to heal or I actually got a lot more support from family and friends and my husband's driving the kids and making the dinner when I'm not feeling well. So it wasn't like a conscious choice of, hey, I want to keep being sick. And it stuck around. So when I finally clear those beliefs, that's when the last bit of those symptoms went away. And, and from then on we were sold. We're like, oh, wow. Okay. So this, that was the category. The people that fell into that category of willing to do all the things and still had autoimmune symptoms, still had just physical stuff going on that it didn't, it just didn't line up with what we knew to be true about the body. So that category of people, we would come down to some belief we found and shifting that belief or shifting their strategy around that belief was enough to shift their body without actually changing what they're taking. And that fascinates me because that's how crazy powerful the brain is. So now that's what we do is we actually train coaches and practitioners and leaders in neurolystic, neuro, linguistic programming, subconscious reprogramming, hypnosis in a, you know, a seven day, very intensive in person training that we do twice a year.

Okay, amazing. So I've got a couple of questions. Are you still, are you still helping women with their hormone health or have you completely shifted?

Completely shifted.

Okay, so now what I'm curious is these women that you have transformed in their hormone health, have they raised their hand and said, hey, I'm interested in learning more about this and becoming coaches themselves?

Most of them, yes.

Yes.

That's where we've had a lot of people come through our training. Who, so we do attract people in the functional medicine space, like doctors, acupuncturists, naturopaths, who, health coaches who Already have a practice and they want to add a tool. We also have had lots of people come through just for their personal transformation or they were in a program and they saw this was important and they're like, I just want this for my family and my kids. So we have seen both, both sides of it. But yeah, a lot of them carried on because they went through their struggle and they realized just like me. I mean I got into women's hormone health because my hormones, I like to say I fell off the cliff. Hormone cliff after, after having a baby. So usually we experience something come out of that and go, oh, I can help people. So yeah, we do have a lot of people who end up deciding to come add that layer.

So. Cool. Okay. So what I love about nlp, specifically because I, it's a tool I use inside of my business is that it really helps, it really helps with behavior change. So a lot of my high level coaches who come into this space. Right, so this, this is going to be a question for you because I'm curious how you navigated it. Something I see a lot which is you have a really like left side scientific brains that are doing the, these, these using these tools or these are, are kind of doing it without realizing that they're doing it like rewiring their brain. So I'm curious for you, how do you get someone who's so left, left sided, dominant, right, like just very like science on board with some of these words like hypnosis and rewiring the brain.

Yes, thank you. That is definitely. So in nlp there's a term for that. It's called ad, auditory, digital. It's a certain type of learning style. It's like the computer. It's, it's, you want all the details and all the facts and they need to line up and things need to make sense. So we do attract a lot of people in that category because that was primarily, primarily, you know, my, my business partner was a anesthesiology turned into a pain doctor. So that's kind of like the AD of the doctors. Right? There's a lot of details and facts and science. So the fun thing is that she brings that. So when, when we're talking about hypnosis or something that can be thought of as this, like, you know, there's no science or this. She brings all that science. She's like, actually there are medical studies and actually they did use this instead of anesthesiology for some situations. And so one bringing, bringing in enough data that the, that, that brain and that type of person can say like, okay, there's something more to this than just like trust, trust and flow or right, whatever. There's, there's something more to this they can actually kind of see. And then we do really challenge, we do really challenge people in this category. And so I, before, before this current thing I'm doing in this lifetime, I was a mechanical engineer for 10 years. So I really did also fall into that category. Although I really feel it was trained into me, I don't think it's actually my natural way of being. So some people it is. And for me it's like, I'm actually, I'm a kinesthetic, I'm a feeler through and through now. But I wasn't, I was trained in like, you do well in school, you get the good grades, you do good at sports. Like, you, you know, you're good at math, so you should, you should do this thing. I was like, okay, good at math, I'll be an engineer. Like, you know, it just was like kind of the path that was laid out for me. And the struggle I see is that then that group of people, me included, can be really, really good at just like doing exactly what they're told, right? But without any actual check in of like their own body, their own intuition, what's good for them. And that can work great in your teens and your 20s, until you get to the point where you've been doing something that's like either totally against what your body wants to be doing, totally against maybe say, even say your human design or how you'd work best. And that's when, you know, oh, look, you know, late 20s, there's some physical ailments popping up, right? That's when the signs come of, like, hey, no, you're not actually operating or doing, you know, you're really going against what you want to be doing. Like, I was in a job where I just felt like it was soul crushing. Like, I liked the people and the design, but I'm like, we make, we were making small plastic parts electrical, like electrical connectors for cars, right? It just, it didn't have that bigger picture feeling of like helping people and excitement. And I'm like, I care about the earth. So I just felt like I was polluting. And, you know, overall I wasn't. I was just kind of more doing what I was told would be good for me to do. So we were really getting people in that category of facts and data. And it has to be, to be, to, to see if they can tap more into like what is their, what are the signs from their body and what are, what are, what are the they think is good for them versus like the stats or the studies? And as you know from nlp, like the idea is that actually we start to break down words and understand what's happening. And some of the wording that's used, such as studies say is a hypnotic pattern. So whenever someone says like such studies say or they say, we immediately go into hypnosis and just whatever follows after that will be believed if it, if it fits your model of the world. If not, you'll just reject it. But so it's so it's really easy for us to gather data and not actually ever know. Well, what study was that? Were there three people? Were there men and women? Was it just men? Like does it apply to me? Right. So yeah. Right. So we're using this concept to really make sure we're breaking down other people's language and our language so we're not falling into that. Like well, there has to be a study cool. If there is and it's a good one, that's great. And sometimes, sometimes maybe there doesn't have to be one. Right.

Yes. What I'm curious is you use the word intuition and tapping into your intuition. So I would love for you to break that down in especially for our left side brain to people because honestly, if in full transparency, this is something that's been hard for me to wrap around. I'm such a head person, I live in the head and, and, and it is very hard for me to this concept of, you know, balance your mind and the concept of listen to your intuition. Well like what the is that and how do I know I'm not listening to it? So I'm just curious for your perspective and for your, your you know, for your left sided brained people, how do you really break that down and help them tap into it?

Okay, well first I want to give a resource because I, I had Jennifer Finley on our podcast so the Becoming Zesty podcast. So from the James Webmore world and she talked specifically about like the whole episode was about that intuition. So check that out because she's you know, goes way into detail for me coming from kind of switching from right like the detail from the analytical side to like the trusting side. It was a matter of getting evidence. So it's slowly picking up evidence of like okay, there were two choices and I felt like this is the one that everyone says you should do like you should post three times a day or whatever it Is right. Whatever the latest thing is. And at one point, Alex and I were looking at each other and we're like, huh, where There. There's like the algorithm, right? There's like the Instagram algorithm or whatever algorithm. But then we're like, there's like this bigger algorithm. Like, I don't know if the word. It's like spiritual. I'm not sure. Energetic algorithm of when you personally are ready for more. Then all of a sudden that was when, like, our TikTok Talk account at the time was like, ready to blow up. It wasn't necessarily that we were doing the things that they said we should be doing. And the timing, it was just like we as a business had finally. We were. We were ready for that level of problem, right? So, like, we had had enough things come into the container that we had worked out, like, okay, what do we do when we have refunds in this way? And we. We finally were like, okay, this is our process. This is how we do it. We do good. We're good with it. But until then, it was like, we weren't. If. If we can't handle one refund, what if we have thousands of people, right? So we really had to be okay with each kind of problem that came in. And I feel like that then expanded our ability to handle problems and then we got more people. So there would be, like, a choice we would need to make of this seems like what most people are telling us to do. And this kind of seems like we want to do. And over time, right? Like, if you make the actual analytical list, one would seem better, but we would choose to do the other one. And then it was just a kind of a check of, like, how did that work out and what was the feeling? Was it like, I'm driven by this, like, fear of, oh, gosh, I have to do that because someone says it, or am I really pulled towards it? And then we. Each person, I feel like, can individually, it's gonna be different for everybody, but kind of start to know what that feeling is for you. And then the next time you were like, okay, now I'm making another decision. And also that human design plays into that too. So. Right how you make the decisions, but. Cause I have to sleep on it and go through the whole ride out my emotional wave. So I feel like over time I start to just really get what your signs are and then be able to do a little less of the looking at details and especially for smaller choices that don't, you know, that aren't going to make A huge impact, like playing around like that. We have people go on these walks where we call them intuition walks, where you just go wherever you go, wherever you turn, where you turn and you do whatever and you just see what happens. Or doing that in the grocery store, no list. So just buy a bunch. Just randomly allow yourself to wander and buy a bunch of stuff and see what happens. And often someone will end up with a bunch of ingredients that are like, oh, looks like we're having tacos. I don't know. It's just a way of, like, slowly stop, like slowing the thinking and just seeing what happens. And over time, I think then my brain was like, oh, well, this is one easier and sometimes faster and often less painful. So I started. There was enough positive reinforcement that I will lean into decisions if I just have that feeling of like. I mean, the joining the first NLP training I did, a friend said to me, I think I'm going to do this. And I immediately was like, I'm in. I had no idea what I was getting into. I never looked at the sales page. I didn't even realize it was like full certification as I'm going to have to read two books. And luckily I didn't know that because I would have. I wouldn't have gone. I would have said, I don't have the time. And I mean, it literally has turned out to be our business. So I don't know if that answers it, but it does.

It does. And I'd love for you to expand a little bit more on. On how you have used NLP specifically now.

Right.

So we talked a little bit about how we've taken someone from the left side of the brain into just these concepts of potentially exploring ways that they can tap into how they feel and to really, you know, use NLP and start accessing a side of their brain that they're potentially have and been using science. So can you expand a little bit more specifically on the process of how you integrate the coaching into somebody's practice or into somebody's way of helping people?

Yes. So there are concepts, they call them NLP presuppositions. But there's concepts within NLP which can really just help people to start taking radical responsibility. So just the idea of we are 100% responsible for ourselves at all times, like, can we stay at cause versus being, in effect, being like, this is all happening to me, right? The. The victim mentality, we're really, really. Everything is really helping people shift over to the what. What can you do about it? Or what what can you choose to make it mean? So, yes, things are going to happen and they happen and then. Right. We choose what that means because sometimes we create a whole identity around a certain, A certain illness or a certain condition or a certain. It can be health, but it can also be like, we've created an identity around. I can only get so far in business. Like, I'm capped out at this point or. Right. So whatever it is we, we. Something happens and it feels like, yes, this is the thing happening. Right. My business partner had chronic pain, I had mold in my body. So something happens. But then the, the identity can be really formed around that. That then everyone in your environment is kind of feeding that back to you. So we realized, my business partner and I realized, like, the way our husbands talk to us of like, oh, are you sure you want to go there? Remember, like, when you sit, you know, when you go on a bike, it kind of hurts your pelvic floor. Right. This, this kind of like checking in with us, we have to start figuring out what are all the beliefs there. So what are all the beliefs there in the health journey and then what are all the people mirroring back to us and do we want that anymore? Because at some point, if we're going to step into that identity of a fully healed, feeling, amazing, healthy body person, we have to at some point start to ask, what would that person be doing? That person. So for me, that person wouldn't be having an absolute freak out when there's a Glade plug in at an Airbnb, Right. Like, I would just unplug it and go on with my day. Right, Right.

My gosh. Listen, speak. This is total side note, by the way, is that we were just in a hotel together. The Marriott in Irvine or Irvine. It took me like a week to like, rinse the scent of the hotel off of me. I. I would like, wake up and feel like it still smelled like the hotel.

Oh, yeah, they're piping it in strong. Yes.

Oh. I was like, oh, my gosh. Anyway, anyway, sorry.

So I went from a place where I had had, you know, mold in my body. So then my limbic system was super overreactive. So anywhere I would go that had like a scent, a smell, my body would freak out and I would. I actually remember running through my friend's, like, I held my breath to go through the lobby of her, of her apartment because it was so musty in there. And like, I was just then creating like this full body state of fight or flight, which of course is not the healing state. And I am not saying, like, that I want to people to be bathing in Glade plugins or that I think they're good for us. That's a different conversation. I also do think that we're super resilient and that it was more my beliefs and my fears. So that was one of the things that I specifically needed to reprogram was the. The fact. The idea that, like, it's safe to breathe in air that's not like 100% clean or really. It was really more the belief that my body can handle this, right? So we're going to come up against stuff. My body can handle this. And there were in rewiring that. So when I say rewiring, we do use a process called quantum time technique. It's like a hypnosis process. But you're. You're essentially going back to a time when your brain made this decision, like, when did I decide? It's not safe. And you're going back to a time where you can kind of get some learnings and some ideas from a higher perspective. So now you're looking at an event going, okay, now looking at it from my adult perspective, because maybe it's something that happened when you were born, maybe it's something that happened when you were three and you made this decision, like, it's not safe when this happens and you can get these learnings because now you're like, oh, my gosh. Like, I see. My parents were just. They were overwhelmed. They weren't planning on having another baby. It's not that they don't love me. It's just like, yeah, I would feel that way too, if I was like, oops, having a third kid. So we can rewrite these stories that I had decided, like, I wasn't. Wasn't wanted or loved. Right? We make up these big stories based on these events. So every time, being in business, being business or having kids or having a health struggle is going to show you and mirror you every single belief you have. Because anytime you come up against something that you have a little bit of a feeling about, there's a. There's a belief there, something. It's like reality is not matching how you want it to be. So it's literally all we're doing. We're like, okay, now you're going to go live on your Instagram. And now you have feelings about that. What is it? Just keep digging into their words and their language, like, what is it? I don't want to do that. Why don't you want like, what is underneath it? And we keep going until usually get to some like, pretty strong statement of I'll be rejected, I'm not smart enough, I'm, I'm not, it's not safe to be seen, whatever, you know, something different for everyone. And then we can actually just go back and figure out when did you decide that? Which is cool because if we say like a limiting belief, then, you know, people are like, those are just my beliefs. Whereas if it's a limiting decision, you're like, well, okay, I decided that at some point and I can now decide differently. I can decide, I can decide now that I'm good at that. I, I've decided that my body can handle pretty much anything. And I, I go in hotels and you know, I smelled the thing and I was like, oh, yeah, it's too bad, but. Right? Yeah, but I'll be fine.

I'm curious. There's two my questions, two parts now is, is how long does it take typically that for people to legitimately rewire their brain to feel like, okay, yeah, I can go into hotels now, I've changed my decision and I have now. And I'm now embodying the version of me that knows I can do this. So that's the first question is typical timeline that you see. And then number two is how often do you see people go into deception? And what I mean by that is, you know, they'll say, oh, I thought I figured this out already and then they did it. Or they'll say, yeah, I am embodying the person of someone who's healthy. And then they're like wearing the mask in their mind.

Right.

So I'm just curious, number one, what's a typical timeline? Number two, how do you deal with deception?

Awesome questions. So typical timeline of, I mean, of course, you know that, that question is complex. And what we see and the reason why we do seven day in person trainings is that when you're in a place for seven days and out of your environment, you're out of your regular environment. So you're, you don't have all those cues, you don't have those people looking back at you. You don't have the water filter sitting next to you. You just don't have all the things that would show you that you're that person and you're with different people, you're doing different things. And, and during the process, you're becoming certified. So every single exercise you do with someone that you're the practitioner and you're also receiving. So by the end of the week you have had a chance to do so many exercises. And we, during the exercises we ask everybody does a real something really they're working on. Don't make things up, but like a real problem you have. And so what's interesting about that is for example, someone came in and she was there to get tools for her clients. She's a, she's a health coach, functional diagnostic nutrition practitioner. She wanted tools for her clients and by the end she realized that essentially her OCD was gone. And so this is a pretty extreme case. So I'm not saying this is, that's going to happen for everyone, but this was, she went to the airport and put her bag on the ground, which is just something she couldn't do because the airport ground is dirty and she had not washed her hands, which was also something she would do as like every few minutes go in and wash her hands. And she just realized that was gone. And that wasn't really anything she said she did one, one exercise out of the whole week. Like one 10 minute exercise was on that topic specifically. So it wasn't like she was working on that. Like that wasn't the goal. And that's what happens. It's so cool is basically all these events and things that happen are so interlinked and so inter, they go together to the point that you don't even really know which thing is leading to which thing. Because we clear the big six. So anger, sadness, hurt, fear, guilt, shame, we clear any big events having those. So obviously I don't know, maybe it was tied to some anger. Maybe who knows exactly which thing it was tied to. But because of that and, and because she felt safe in that container, that's a really important part of it. So the person has to feel safe in our opinion for it to, to work fast. When they feel safe and they actually give themselves separation and time to dive in. We say like the whole NLP term is it's fast and it lasts. Like it really, it really is. When they want to change though, that's, that is a big caveat which I think is part of your second question. It's when they change. So I've seen, I mean we've seen extreme stuff happen in a week, but a week is a long time. Whereas in an hour long session I've helped, you know, like an entrepreneur work through a limiting decision around business. And then right after we shift, so after you have shifted the wiring of the brain, you then want to go secure it in with a task. So if you Just shifted. I remember during a launch for us, I was like, gosh, every time during launch it's like I all of a sudden have zero new ideas. Like all the rest of the year I'm like, oh, I could do that, I could do that. And now my creativity just seems to be gone. It's like this is the time to be posting and sharing every day and all of a sudden I've got nothing. So I, during the middle of the launch had my coach work with me and we cleared that like the belief that I can't operate under pressure is what was what the belief was. And we cleared that in the moment. So then she gave me the tasking right after. She's like, hey, I want you to go do those 10 videos. Just do them. So it was cleared and then we're securing it in with the task. Like, okay, what is the person who believes they can do anything under pressure? What are you going to go do? So if people aren't willing to, then go do the thing. Like if you have a bunch of people in your environment who are really horrible for you, like they're just toxic relationships, or you absolutely hate your job, or you can change your brain, but if you go right back to the old environment, it doesn't stick. So the follow through part is really important. So I don't know, I've seen really quick stuff happen, especially for business owners in like one session. For health, things are usually a little bit more nuanced. So I would do like a three month. If it were a one on one program, I was usually in a three month package to actually slowly be digging out more of the roots of it. So it's kind of like if you can go all in and do seven days, awesome. Otherwise it was usually spread out over three months and then at the same time people have, can have a shift in just an hour. Pretty cool.

So cool. Okay, so dive into deception because I'm curious about how you navigate it, how you notice it and how it shows up for people and for your business, for your clients and how you continue to just, just shipped it.

Okay, so you're defining that, right? Let me just make sure I'm clear. The deception of they think things are better or say it again, it's like they think they're.

Let me see if I can ask it in a different way because I, I just see this a lot and I noticed it in myself too, which is that they think they've rewired their subconscious. They're like, I've now stepped into the identity of someone who is, you know, healthy and fit. I'm. I'm stepped into the identity of a million a month, whatever. And then. And then, however, there are still layers that are deeper that they haven't actually gotten to the root cause. It's like they pull the weed out, but the roots are still there. And they don't.

Okay. This is so. This is so good because of a person. Personal journey I'm going through right now. So I've been sharing on my Instagram. I've read this book called Radical Honesty, like, a couple weeks ago. Comes with a huge, huge caveat. So be. Do you enter carefully with this book? The funny thing is, though, in the process, it was just the perfect book at the perfect time. This is one of those things that kind of came to me like a friend just happened to. I happened to see it, and I was really drawn to it. Whereas I had five other books in. In a row that were first. Right. So that's kind of where Intuition Beverly. If I had been like, nope, you're. You're number six. Right. I already had a plan, like, my kind of plan, but I was like, no, I'm dropping it all. I'm really called to this book. So in the process of reading this book, I have discovered how much stuff I've hidden from myself. So we all do this. I mean, I really do believe I am a. I am a very good practitioner, and I'm very good at this for other people. Right. So we can't see our own stuff. That's why we hire coaches. I hire coaches. That's why I get in those rooms. Because it's so hard to see our own stuff. That's one. So one is like, we can actually hide it from ourselves pretty well. The other thing I think that happens is just like, whether we're ready for the next layer or whether we're really kind of fighting it. So we can rewire to a certain degree if there is a lot of secondary gain in our life, meaning there's something else we're holding onto, like, which we. We really want to rewire, but we want that comfort and safety so badly, and we're just really. We're not really ready to give it up. And there's something. And maybe it's in relationship or maybe it's in business, but we say we want that big thing, but we really haven't expanded ourselves enough for what that would mean. So it's. I. What we believe is that stuff will come up from the unconscious mind when we're ready, right? So we'll. We'll work with people, and we'll be like, okay, we know you might be really. Like, there might be some stuff down there you really don't want to see or you really don't want to know. But we want you to know that it doesn't just pop up until someone's actually ready to deal with it. And I think that there's just seasons of life where we are in seasons of life where we're not or we're like that. That information. The information that what ended up happening with my husband and I reading this book is we decided to sit down and have a full day of, let's just tell each other everything we've ever done to each other that the other person doesn't know. And this was one of the most freeing things we've ever done and horrible and really hard. It was so freeing, though. But if we had done that three years ago, I think we'd be divorced. Like, I don't think the me from three years ago could have handled that. So it finally came of, like, okay, we were in a place where we were, like, really actually ready to be fully honest. And. And because we were ready, it was like, the. The speed with which this transformation has happened in the last two weeks is, like, faster than anything else. So that's why it's like, when you're ready and it's like, everything has built up to that point, you really can rewire in that moment. But if we're not really there and we're kind of trying to pull ourselves along of like, come on, you want to be that new identity. Come on, you keep saying it, but. But really we're like, we're still tied to all of our stuff, right? We're like, no, but I really want to bring all these problems along, too, or I can't say that thing to that person. What I am finding is it's really all about the fact that I couldn't. I don't ever want to hurt people's feelings. I was the peacekeeper of the family. And so all the things that come with honesty, that it may hurt someone, they may be upset with you, as I've been freeing that, and then having it come back towards me, because that's been another interesting part of this process. Of course, when you're really honest with people, they start to be really honest with you. And now I get to hear all my faults or things that bother them. For the last 10 years, that hasn't been said because we were in this kind of like, Kumbaya peacekeeper relationship. And this becomes a practice of like, okay, that I thought that thing would be so hard to hear, that I couldn't handle it, but you just said it and that I'm, okay, like, we're gonna make it. So it becomes just a practice of actually finding where we're limiting ourselves or where we're tricking ourselves. Because, I mean, I. I was doing it and probably still am. I'm sure there's still stuff, you know, like, it's. I don't know that it goes away, but it's like, what. What is the next part you're ready to look at? Because if we're still in that frustration of I'm doing all the things, or I'm like, I. I know how to visualize and I know how to be that identity, and I'm like, saying the affirmations, but they're not actually happening, then we know there's some mismatch. There's. We know there's a mismatch, obviously. Right. Or it would be happening. And we just have to keep digging to be like, what is that thing I'm so afraid to look at? It's usually something we're afraid to go towards.

Oh, my gosh, this is so good. And this is also why it's so. I have so many more questions that I know I will be respectful of your time, but this is why it's so important to have these types of tools inside of your pot, in. In your pocket, both yourself and as the coach.

Right.

It's really, you know, something that we kind of touched upon, but it's worth reiterating is that wherever is that. That what you are experiencing often is what's most personal, is most general. That when you're going through this, you're going to be. Meaning that. That you're going to be able to help more people because more people are experiencing the same thing you are. And they need your lessons and your context, which is going to be completely different than anyone else out there. So that's why I think this stuff is so important. But what I'm curious about, and it ties in, so I'm glad I asked these questions at the same time, is that there's a difference between. Between, you know, putting your order in in Amazon and waiting three days and just knowing that it's going to show up. And then three days later, oh, there it is. Because there's this. This time.

Right?

The paradox of time, where it's both an illusion and also there's an experience that you're gonna have at the same time. So there's a difference between knowing it's coming versus all of a sudden it's been ten days where' package. And you start to notice, oh, wait, there's more that I need to look at. How do you navigate that paradox of time?

So this is the idea of, like, if we really could just place our order to the universe of what we'd want and feel. So sure. It just pops right up, right.

And then it takes what it takes until it takes. And you don't have to stress about, oh, maybe I need to look a little bit closer and look that maybe there's more to uncover that I just have been resisting that I want to take all these problems along with me.

So we. We do love our problems and our stories because it helps us validate why we do or don't have the thing we have. Right. So it's such a trick to be like, I am going to, on one hand drop that story and just let it go. Right. Like, essentially dissolve the problem. And then on another hand, like, what. What do I need to look into more? Like, what. What beliefs are here? Or what. What do I need to embody more? So I think one of the biggest takeaways that I had from when I went to the master practitioner level of NLP was the idea of holding a paradox. So being able to hold the and. Right. So it's. It's this and. And. And it's this because they're usually so contradictory. You're like, just let go. But also dig into all your stuff and just. Just trust. Right. But also you need to feel it. Like, so there's this. There's this back and forth. And I think if we. If I could. And I'm not there, if I could just fully drop into the. Just, Just trust and put. Place my order. Cool. Because that would be great.

It's like quantum sleep. And it happens in an instant and also wait three days for your prime order to deliver. Yeah.

But I think anything in the in between gives us that mirror of, like, what. Of what's still there and what's. What we're here to work on. And. And like you said, I mean, now I can see. I mean, I'm in the middle of. The last couple weeks have been very, very intense for my husband. And I, like, if I actually told the details, I think most people would be like, you seem. Okay, this doesn't. These aren't good details. And I think the lens has shifted so much that I'm like, well, one, I know we'll get through this. Two, I know we are learning a ton from this. I'm gonna have so many more tools after this because I personally had to feel it and go through it. And it's just that the Len the lens has changed. It's not really. But because of that, the timeline has changed. Because I know for a fact in the past, because I did it five years ago, that I held on to stuff he told me for months and months and months. And why we went around in circles for months and months and months. And instead this time we are in real time at every moment being like, okay, what's that look on your face? And we're just openly. We're actually just openly talking. Wow, it's such a concept. I was actually so mad at myself when I'm realizing how little I do this. I was like, we could have been doing this for like the last 18 years. This whole like protecting other people's feelings. And it wasn't, it wasn't protecting anyone. It was leading to more resentment. And so now we have this real time feedback.

Yeah, well, I want to dive into this a little bit because I think that we go and this is important. I know we're talking about this in the context of relationships, but this is you're work. When you're working with a client, you're in relationship, whether you know them well or you don't. So this is really important that we look at this, that there is a. And especially in today, today's world of what we. In how we live. But there is a difference between intention and impact. And when you talk about radical honesty and radical responsibility, I'm curious your perspective on how you navigate, you know, the, the, the fallout or the consequences of your actions. So what I mean by that is like, let's just take it to the extreme, right? Someone gets murdered, they're gonna have. And you are the murderer. You're gonna have consequences for your actions because you did that and you impacted someone else, even though your intention was like, like the voices told me, Right. Whatever it is.

Okay.

I'm bringing this up because my husband talks about this a lot and it's actually, he always quotes Taylor Swift. So for my swifties out there, right, it's this concept of casually cruel in the name of honesty. And so I'm curious, you know, how do you navigate the, the differences for yourself around the intention versus impact, what you're responsible for and how you take responsibility.

So in nlp, one of the Beliefs is that communication is the response you get. So it's not what you say. Like, you. If you are still not getting the response from the person that you're interacting with, then you haven't communicated clearly yet. Right. So it's on you as the communicator to actually. Especially as the coach, but. Right. To actually get across what you're attempting to get across. And if they are still not doing the thing or not understanding or feeling really attacked, then you did not communicate well. So the interesting thing about that book, Radical Honesty, one of the things I did not like about it is that it was very much like, you tell everybody all the things all the time. Like, that's it. And I do feel like that's leaving out a big point here, which I'm really into the nonviolent communication. Have you read that book? Book at all, or. Yeah. So. Okay, so I also am into. It's more about, like, the. The needs. You're checking in with the needs of both people. So to me, it's how. How this thing, how things are said and for what purpose. So what I kept doing when I was looking at kind of like being honest with, like, clients or being honest with partner or friends, I wasn't going for what they did. Like, I don't like when you do that. I was going more for. This was the belief or the story I made up or this is how I experienced it when that happened. So I was being more brave with explaining my. My interpretation of the event. So, for example, hey, I said to. To someone, I said, when you canceled on our weekend retreat and didn't tell me directly, you know, told another friend, but just didn't tell me directly. I. I made that mean that I wasn't. That I wasn't important. And I actually kind of just have stopped talking to you since. So I didn't give that person a chance to even explain because I made up a story that I'm not important because why would they not have even told me and then just dropped it? So I was more sharing, like, radical honesty of my side of the street. Like, this is what. This is what my brain did. And I'm kind of embarrassed that I actually just like, went that extreme and dropped it without even giving you a chance to speak. So the radical honesty, I think, you know, someone said to me, she's like, oh, my husband's way too honest. Because it's like, you don't want someone coming up to be you and saying, that outfit's ugly. Right? Like, that doesn't Feel good. And what does that communicate? What does that communicate? So there is, I think, an art to actually using language in a way of what are you getting across? And, and for what purpose? Like, so why are they telling you that? And so it could be something deeper of like underneath that they want to actually admit about themselves. Like radical honesty. They might be like, usually when somebody has a problem with what you're wearing or how you look, it's really because they have a problem with them and how they look. So if they're starting to recognize, like, hey, I actually am judging you often in how you look, that's more on them. Like they're, that's the thing they're doing. Like, and then this and then we can talk about, okay, well why are you doing that? Are you judging yourself? Do you have a problem with how you look like, you know, you can get more into it based on the way it was worded versus just like, I got a problem with everybody. I'm gonna let you all know. Does that.

Yeah, that makes sense. It has been such a real, like having these tools while you're a parent has been game changer for me. I'm just gonna share because when I, as I'm, you know, kids, if you're a parent and you have experienced what it's like to raise like little children, they are amplifiers of, of this to like the nth degree. I mean, I use my, my communication skills for my children all of the time. And they are like a no filter. I mean, it's so amazing. They are a zero filter reflection of what it's like to communicate like from the, you know, and it's just incredible to watch how they get indoctrinated just as they grow. Because from a little age, they are zero filter, 100% honesty, have no like, qualms. They learn those qualms. So it's been really powerful for me to have this as a parent because it's helped me navigate their ability to communicate and also to, to interpret things that are happening in their life. So, so powerful.

Well, this is really interesting with kids and this is something, right? Because obviously now I work with adults who are like reprogramming what happened as a kid. So now I'm very aware of like, well, what am I programming with my kids? Like, I don't want them to have to reprogram. And there's plenty that just of life and society. That that's just how it is. But for example, my daughter wanted to go, she wanted to have a play date this weekend. And she wanted to text the other family. And I'm like, great. And she's like, well, I want to go to their house. And I was like, okay, well, you know, I'm over here. Like, well, that's rude. Like, I'm thinking, well, you can't just say, can I come over? And then she's kind of like, why not? And then I was like, gosh, I don't know why not. It's funny because it's like a family. We don't know that well. Whereas if it's other families that I know that they know me. And so I was like, oh, this is all about I don't want to look rude, right? Like, I don't want to be the unaware parent that's like. And. And it's because I've been such a peacekeeper in the past that I'm afraid that they won't want her over there and they won't be able to say no. So I was like, oh, my gosh, this is exhausting. And I'm teaching her to filter and not ask for what she wants. So I was like, you know what? Actually, just go ahead. So she just said, hi, this is Paige. Can I come over? And they said, what happened? And they said, yes, that's great, right? And it just was.

Love it. I love it.

It was. I actually one time accidentally texted a brand new neighbor. I meant to text my husband, and I said, hey, would you be willing to start dinner? We're running late. And she was like, sure.

Oh, my gosh.

We. We laugh about it now because we're much closer now. But I was like, wow, you really were. She's like, yeah, I. That sounded like you were in a pinch. I was happy to help. And so it is just interesting how much people are willing to do and just how much if we ask directly more often, like the kids do, we. We would get. And I'm like, what's the worst that's going to happen? She's just going to say, well, we're busy. Or she'll say, our house doesn't work. How about yours? Okay, that's a lot more direct. And usually I say, can you have a play date? Either house is fine, but really my daughter's like, no, I want to go to their house. So what am I teaching her? You know, so good.

Yes, I do. Okay, so can you. I want to be mindful of your time. So this will be the. This will be the last question, but can you walk us through a little bit about what the seven day Process is like why it's seven days, why it's in person or. Or what? Yeah, why it's in person. And then share with us a little bit like if we want to go deeper, become master NLP or something, what are some of the things that we can do?

Absolutely. So I am a very strong advocate of in person training for nlp. I've had a lot of people come to me and say like, I'm NLP trained. And then as we're talking I'm, I'm realizing that they did an online program that didn't have any interaction, which is actually great because this is the kind of thing you can hear, I mean 8 million times and you'll get something new. So there's nothing wrong with that. It's actually I, I did online like five times before I went in. So it's, it's great. I just know that there is magic in that in person container that you just cannot replicate online. Because the majority of the breakthroughs that people have in our seven day are around the actual container. It's around, can I leave my kids for seven days? Who am I? Who am I to actually leave? And the, what they even have to do to get there? Am I to spend 6 to $8,000 on myself for a training, that kind of thing, the investment or interacting with the humans. Like someone took my chair. I always sit there. Like there's just the actual like environment of people are stressed out or upset and they go, we go into our roles like they're trying to caretake someone else and we don't allow that there. You're only there for you. Or they're trying to avoid. We have all of our healers who are like, oh, I'll go second. Right. They're always like the second one. So then they run out of time. We have our repressed people who always sit in the corner. Like there's patterns. There's patterns that come out where we can spot them really fast too because it's such an intense container. So it's one that just getting there usually requires a breakthrough. And then two, it's like we spend so much time together that we see the patterns really quickly. Because someone on a zoom call once a week for a year, they can, I'm going to say, trick us not, you know, not on purpose, but they can have us thinking like, oh, they just seem really go with the flow and easygoing. But when you spend seven days straight with someone, their stuff comes out like you. You see, it cannot be hidden. Especially day two. Or three when maybe you haven't slept or maybe you had a really, you know, you're processing being really big and then you're overtired. And we love it when people are overtired because it's just, it's real. Everything becomes, filters are down, the real stuff comes out and we get right to work. So the process just takes, takes you through languaging first and then we do a lot of rewiring of subconscious mind with what we use as quantum time technique. So the process leads you through and then we secure it in with all the good things we do want at the end. So all of our goals and all the stuff we want to be happening later in our timeline, we always end on like a major high. But there is a process of kind of like unearthing anything that comes up for people and then having them trust they're in a safe space, having them see how many other people they've helped. Because really all this, a lot of this stuff is, it's just a script. Like you can, you can hand the script to someone and get results. So it is really cool to see that there's not all that much to it because you're not, you're not having to know any answers in this work. Like, I can do a relationship breakthrough with someone even though like they, I don't have any relationship advice because I am just pulling out what they want and what they need. You're, you're using their language to get to their answer versus like an expert, right where you're coming to me and like, here's the hormone protocol. It's much more like I'm gonna pull out of the languaging what you want, and then we're gonna find a strategy that your brain does to make it happen. And then we're gonna rewire that from what you said, you don't want to what you do want. So there isn't any of like what I think, which is really freeing because as it turns out, on my health journey, I realized that worked for me and what I think doesn't work for other people necessarily. So those are seven days. We do them twice a year in Dallas. Although we do have a two day event. Beverly, that might be a good place for people to get their feet if they're like going to a full seven day certification. Sounds like a lot. We'll, we do a two day event also twice a year, but the next One will be January 19th and 20th in Virginia Beach. It's where I live. And we're new where are you?

I'm in New York.

Over. Yep. So we will go two days into habits. We're going to go deep into habits. What are our strategies for habits? This can be for you. It can be used for clients. But just, just really understanding why, why we don't do the things we say we want to do and helping have tools to uncover that we will drop limiting beliefs during the week. It's. It's a great place for connection with other coaches, practitioners, people who are wanting to be a leader or to make change. That's who we attract mostly. And then we're going to lock it all in with sound healing. So. Oh, yes. And so for someone here who is interested in this and would like to win a free ticket, we have decided to, to. To do a giveaway for anyone who posts a review on the podcast. If you put at the end of your review, like let's do hashtag Zesty. Just so we know that these reviews are actually are wanting to be in the drawing, we do ask that you can actually come, you know, January 19th and 20th and then take a screenshot and DM to either me or Beverly. I'm our Instagram is at becoming Zesty.

I love it. We'll make sure we link all this up and we'll make sure that you have plenty of time to submit for a free ticket. When are you doing the giveaway by?

Well, do you have any idea when this would be live? No, it doesn't matter. Maybe we'll just say a week from when the podcast is live. How about that?

The 22nd. So we'll say.

January 1st. I don't know.

Oh, January 1st. Okay. We'll give them some holiday. We'll give them some holiday buffer. So you had till January 1 to submit your review and then we will do a giveaway. Love it. Okay. And we'll make sure that we link all those up and we, we ref. We both reference some episodes that we'll make sure that we link up here for you so that you can check them out. So thank you, Megan, so much for pouring into me, for pouring into my community. I really, really appreciate it.

Thank you for having me.

Thank you for listening to the PT Profit podcast. If you like this episode, chances are your friends will too. So it would be a huge service to us if you would please leave us a review and share with your friends on your social media channels when you leave. Leave us a review. Be sure to take a screenshot of it and email that screenshot to my team@info simpsonfitness.com and we'll send you a very special Instagram podcast that will show you how to create compelling content so that your ideal clients come to you. And you go from wanting clients to a wait list of clients ready for your services. Thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you on the next episode.