https://www.listennotes.com/e/2290364dd1cb4912b29a725396d5824e

What's up everyone? Welcome to another episode of the Magnetic Operator. I'm your host, Kaden. Alongside me is Sam.

Hello everyone.

And we have a pretty interesting and fun topic to dive into today. One that I'm still trying to master, but one that I feel is probably at the heart of, at least the beginning of every problem, probably stems from the lack of skill when it comes to asking questions, because if you ask.

A stupid question, you'll get a stupid answer.

Most likely. Most likely. I've spent a bunch of time in all of my career reading books, and usually the most engaging type of question gets me to self-reflect. And most of the time, that's never going to come from a yes or no answer. So today we're going to dive into the transformational leadership that can happen when building service contractor teams, facility managers know how to ask better questions. Not only better questions to their employees, but better questions even to their clients. How it helps in sales, how it helps in marketing. Everything comes to the question you're asking and the community that typically would answer in the same way. Attracting talent is gonna come from your ability to ask the right questions to discover. Sam, you and I have had many conversations on one's ability to discover. It's not just a sales tactic. It is. I think at the core of relationships is the ability to ask good questions to develop a relationship. So to dive into today, I want to talk about the power of questioning.

Hold on. I'm going to ask you a question, okay? To really get your mind going. And here's some value here. What is your greatest fear, Kaden?

Oh my gosh. Okay, so the reason why I ask this question to my employees.

I answer the question. Don't skirt around it. Just answer the question.

So Mike, my greatest fear- I'm asking.

A deep question here.

My greatest fear is the deep, dark unknown of the ocean.

And let me show you how to ask an even deeper question. Why?

I actually don't know why. It's fear of the unknown, maybe?

Fear of the unknown of what is at the bottom of the sea.

Sure, and that can even happen in like a lake when it's like, at dawn or dusk, either one, whatever time of day. Well, both those particular times when the water is really dark, it's just like, what's underneath me?

Yeah, you're right.

But I can be on a boat just fine. It's just, I don't know, maybe as a kid I saw terrifying movies, I don't know. But even to this day, I literally, okay, real quick to this, if you have never experienced the new Apple Vision Pro, I haven't. Go to the Apple Store, you can experience it, do a demo, but it's very real. The virtual reality presents. And I was in the middle of the demo and the dude asked me, he said, Do you have any fears, like scared of heights or anything? And I was like, how would you ask that question? I was like, no, I'm good. Lo and behold, guess where it went in the demo?

Dropped right in the ocean.

The deep, dark ocean. Literally, I had to hold my breath. It was anyways. I don't know where that comes from.

Well, I just learned a lot more about Caden and that is what we want to talk about today. Why asking good questions actually gets you more information that you need to succeed. Now, I'm not going to take him on a boat in the middle of the ocean because he might just have a heart attack. I like Caden, so I don't want him to sulk out.

So, I mean, the reality is, is that as a leader, your ability to ask questions is going to stem not only from practice, but it's also going to come from the recipient and the responses that you're going to get to realize like being able to analyze. We're talking about steps in asking the right questions. We'll talk about later on about some, maybe some not so fun dumb questions that aren't going to get you anything. We'll give you some exact examples of that. But I think one of the coolest moments that I ever had was when I paid for a mentor in 2017, did a whole year long program with him, and she asked me a question that made me self-reflect that made me realize there was a gap in my life. I'm not gonna go necessarily maybe into those personal details, but that gap that was uncovered came from her ability to pull out and ask a question that made me realize I didn't have the answer to. that I really wanted the answer to. And honestly, I would say from that moment forward, that question that she asked me made me go search. It made me take action. And so I think the ability for a leader to ask a question I know is going to come from the response. Someone wants to go and search for the answer to go on a journey. And it all stems from just maybe the leader taking a moment to ask a better question.

I think also one thing that I've found in just being in leadership positions is you put a leader or a manager in place because you trust that individual to make sure that others are performing at a level that is necessary. And I don't know how many times I've had an employee come to me and state, Hey, how would you go about this? And I answer their question with another question and say, How would you go about this? And by simply asking the question, they actually are able to find the answer themselves. We even wrote down here that Tony Robbins said successful people ask better questions and as a result they get better answers. Say yes. You know that that's Tony Robbins.

That's a good impersonation.

Thanks. Questioning the questions even is an aspect of leadership that I think is super interesting when we allow people to find and really start to let their wheels turn. Then they can win, right? They can succeed. And when they succeed, then we as leaders succeed.

Yeah.

When you have a powerful question, you can deflate the question and its impact.

Tom Brady?

Yeah.

Deflate gate.

Yeah.

2015.

I don't know what he gave it was.

Whatever happened. But you can deflate it by just being like, oh, why? This isn't a diss on therapist. But I think of a therapist, like, why do you feel that way? I don't think that quite is a great follow-up question. You can ask a question and then you just, Hey, why? If you just leave it at why, it might, in fact, there might even be a stemming of like you're challenging someone or it might come off as like, I don't believe you, why, or back it up. So you don't want to ask why necessarily.

Feels more like an interrogation.

Yeah.

FBI agent. Why did you do that?

Why did you do that?

But why is important though.

It is, it should start with why. Start with why. But that doesn't mean the question is just why. Yeah.

Great point.

Anyways, so maybe we'll dive into that a little bit. But maybe a little test of would you rather, since it's a question, would you rather this or that? We got a fun one for you today. And well, you could probably do this better.

Okay.

Sam is a voiceover artist as well. And a knack for it, just for fun.

Not my full-time gig, but I'll share the Would youd Rather, okay? Everyone loves a good game of Would youd Rather. Sometimes me and my kids will just sit on the couch and we play Would youd Rather. What they come up with is really fun sometimes, but this one's pretty good. So, would you rather always ask your team questions that sound like a cheesy game show host? Why didn't you finish this task for 500 points? Or questions that sound like a melodramatic soap opera star. Why did you betray me with that mistake? What would you do, Caden? Would you rather have to ask that question, why didn't you finish the task in a cheesy game show host or be the soap opera star?

I'd probably go with the soap opera star.

Well, let's hear it.

I can't do it. Come on. But here's something. Here's why I would do that is because the dramatic soap opera would probably bring in emotion. Sometimes that just makes it great and fun, dramatic. I mean, that's why it's on an episode or something. It's entertaining.

So going off of that though, right, how you portray a question, what tone, what voice, what approach you take in a question can completely change.

Yeah, you know, going after the game show host type of question to an employee probably isn't the way to especially.

Why didn't you finish a task? Yeah, you know, my, my employees would be like, what, why are you asking it that way?

Yeah, it's not a good question. And so tone illustrating, you know, in that, that tone matters, your delivery matters, asking a question isn't just as simple as asking like, oh, why? You know, and the delivery matters when it comes to you being as a leader, being able to show empathy or realize that what you're about to ask might already be a triggering event or a charge thing, especially if it's to discover more about a need for a and you want to have a great relationship with potential person, if it's a client, if it's an employee, it doesn't matter, is you want to make sure that it's a safe environment to be able to ask questions. That's the other thing. Often you aren't going to be diving into the power of questioning and what it could truly deliver when it comes from a place that doesn't lead with like that you actually care, right?

Trust.

Because if you're just asking questions for the sake of questions, and you haven't shown anything that says, hey, there's this level of trust and a foundation that we can have an open conversation. It's not going to go anywhere. You will just get, oh, yes or no, or like, oh, I don't have any feedback.

Yeah, that's interesting. When you're utilizing the question and formulating, almost kind of like trying to envision what their response might be, but there has to be a level of compassion and empathy, like you mentioned. The only way to get to true answers is if they actually trust you and are able to be open with you.

Yeah, well, and it's also gonna come from, okay, if I was asked the same question by my boss, how would I respond? How would I want to be asked the question? So maybe just a quick check at the door before you go into a meeting or a conversation.

Self-evaluation.

Yeah, dude, raise your game.

It starts with you. First, understand where you're coming from, what you're trying to accomplish. And then when you go work with the team, how are you helping them? Like giving them clarity, helping them understand, hey, this is why I'm trying to do this. And I see you and you trying to accomplish this. Let's work together.

You just mentioned that self-awareness, that's step one into knowing if you were asking the right questions. Because how can you join in a conversation and dive into evaluating the scenario if you haven't done anything to make sure that you are prepared for that and so when you think about, I'm about to address an employee, and my first step is that self-assessment becoming self-aware. What has led up to me to about to ask this question? And here's a detrimental step that a lot of people take is they lead with a question that was based off of an assumption. I hate assuming it always gets us in trouble.

You know what they say, I won't say it, but you know what they say.

What?

No, I'm kidding.

If you assume it makes sense of you and me, which spells assume if you didn't catch that.

Sure. Okay, so that's step one. Going into a conversation. Here's your action for today's. Take a self-awareness quiz, you know, in your own mental thought and mind that, hey, I'm going into this conversation. again, I'm going to have this approach. How would I receive this approach? And if I don't like it, then I better change my approach going to the employee. The second thing is to increase engagement with your employee that you were going to ask questions with. It shouldn't be a yes or no question. Like the worst question you can ask is, Hey, do you have any questions for me?

Yeah, that one never works in sales, by the way. They almost always say, No, I don't.

No.

So what would be a good example? You're on a one-on-one with an employee and you're trying to uncover to discover more about an issue that you want to learn more about. What question do you lead with?

I love help me understand. Starting that way already sets the preface that I want you to help me know what you're going through, what you're experiencing. Helping me understand is I think a great lead in to any approach of trying to open up the conversation.

When you lead with, Hey, I love that X is happening. So you're leading with the fact that I'm not here just to say what's wrong. I'm just reminding you here's where I do appreciate you, but here is now where I need you to improve. Or here's, even if it's I need you to improve, you may not have an understanding of what needs to be improved yet. Here's what I want to discover more about. maybe there's improvement here, or maybe I just need to understand more because maybe it's just my own assumptions, my own way of thinking when you actually are doing your job correctly. That's a great one. And at the core, when you lead with that, you lead with an opportunity that you're establishing trust because you're going to start a relationship and a conversation when you dive into questions that says, Hey, I love that this is happening. It's letting the employee know that, you can trust that I'm looking out for everything that's happening, not just the issue that's at hand.

From a prospective customer point too, what are some ways that you have experienced or like asking good questions to someone considering a service, right? Like I think about a framework that I've been using when I'm in a sales conversation. What's your current state? Tell me more about that. Walk me through your process.

Right?

This is the Magnetic Operator Podcast. It's all about understanding process, right? And even from an internal perspective or if you're looking external, what's the current state? Where are you at? What's the pain you're experiencing? Help me understand that. Is there an impact? And if so, tell me about how it's impacting. It literally is. Instead of it just being a yes or no question, the best questions are how, why. When, what? Those will get you to the initial layer. And then as an onion, right? Ogres, sorry, ogres have layers. Donkey.

Right, that's- that's- I had kids recently.

Exactly. But you pull back the layers and you just keep getting deeper and deeper until you reach the answer of the ideal state. Like where are you trying to be? So if it's an employee, a prospective customer, a customer, Getting them to that level is just pulling back those layers.

When you're trying to understand maybe the emotional tie to some of those answers, and we've talked about this before, but I love asking a rating type of question.

Oh, yes.

And it's because it allows you to pull in and set up the expectation that like, Hey, here's the scenario and how would you rate this? And someone says, I'd give it a seven. That allows you to dive deeper into it and be like, not just, oh, why? I mean, why is a decent follow up question there? But the better question is, hey, what would make it a 10? You pull out the expectations of what someone is feeling to say, I'm going to get it to a 10 by doing X. So when I'm sitting down with a one-on-one with an employee and I'm going to ask a question that says, hey, can you do me a favor? And on a scale of to 10 or 1 to 10. 10 being like the perfect almighty perfect leader. Where would you rate me? Most people probably aren't comfortable giving you a 10, but whatever number they give, let's say they give you a seven, the ability for the conversation to open up and ask a question when you're trying to get feedback, whatever it may be, now says, okay, well you rated me a seven. I'm curious, what does a 10 look like? Since we're hypothetically talking now, because now they can start telling you attributes and scenarios and might even be real things that have happened recently. Like in that situation, I would have given you a 10, but now they're teaching you because of the question you asked. Right? So that's why I love rating questions. It doesn't mean they're always applicable. And the who, what, when, where, why, how, you know, all those types of questions. But when you get to have someone, it adds an emotional aspect of it. Hey, give me a rating. Now it's a, I gotta put a number on this.

Awesome. So key points really, the greatest takeaway from today's episode, what is it?

One, it's asking questions is a muscle. You aren't gonna learn it overnight. And so the best way to go do it is just to start asking more questions with your team member being a leader. If you aren't holding one-on-ones, if that's not part of your operational framework, we'll dive into that.

Not part of your MO.

Yeah. We'll dive into that in another episode.

But Mo stands for what? Modus Mader Operario.

No.

No, not at all. Is it Greek or Italian?

I don't remember the origins of it. Anyways, we just looked it up because I've always referenced this. What is your Mo? Which has to do with how you operate. Yes. Your operation. but which is why it's also part of when we say what is your MO, we're also referring to what is your magnetic operations, what is your style in how you are going to operate your facility service team, your employees being known for the way you bring in talent, the way you attract talent, the way you bring customers in all comes from your ability to have an operational framework as a business that is magnetic. that lures people in, it tracks people to you because of the way you operate. It increases productivity, it lets employees retention skyrocket. All of those things come down to what I believe one of the greatest assets as an organization is your processes. And your employees that get to funnel in these processes because you built them on a solid foundation of a magnetic operational framework makes people want to stay. want to enjoy their work and to have the job satisfaction and happiness level that honestly at the heart of every human being we all desire.

And when employees are productive and feel successful and are actually accomplishing the work, guess what happens? You get more customers because the function of your business is actually thriving through your people.

Your vibe attracts your tribe.

Update the process, get the people, people bring the business.

100%. So hopefully you have some golden nuggets and takeaways from that to go learn how to ask better questions. Go practice. Rule number one, be self-aware first. How would you receive the question? Go practice in the mirror, right? Does your body language communicate like, oh, I better not tone voice, all of that. I had a the resting pissed off face. We won't get into that. Yeah, but go practice. Start with being self-aware and take a self-assessment on how you would receive it. and then go have the conversation because you've already kind of gotten out the rehearsal in the mirror. And you'll be surprised on the level of conversation you end up having with employees. And that is your assignment. And I hope you take it away and actually go learn from it and go experience. We'd love to hear stories, comment on this podcast in the comment section. What happened when you used these techniques? Did you end up having a better conversation? we want to hear about it. Okay, that's it. And that's a wrap on the episode of the Magnetic Operator. Thanks, everyone.

Thanks.