🔴 HOW TO SAY NO DURING NURSING SCHOOL

Hello. Are you feeling super stressed and overwhelmed about nursing school coming up into the next term? If you are feeling that stress, feeling that pressure, thinking about all the things that you've got to do, then this video today is for you, my friend. So today we are talking about how to say no to the things that don't matter, how to say yes to the things that do matter, the things that are important to you, and how to give yourself grace for all of those things in between. Because we know that all those things pop up, right? So the first thing I want to say that we know that saying no is really hard. This idea of saying no to friends, to family, oh, I can't go to this next Sunday, or sorry, I can't, you know, help out at church on Saturday. I can't, you know, volunteer in my kids class. I can't, you know, do all of these things because I am in nursing school. It's tough to say no, right? It's tough to say no. It's tough to say no to people because we are people pleasers. At least I know I am. I know. If you're a people pleaser, please, please, please comment below and let me know that I'm not the only one. I've got both my H raised. Oh my gosh. Yes, Mario. The struggle. The struggle is real, right, you guys? Oh my gosh. It is tough to say no, especially when we're in nursing school. We feel all this pressure to be everything to everybody all the time. It's very, very hard. So the first thing I want you to know today, and I really, really. If you're doing something else right now, just stop for a second and listen to this. Listen to this. Because when I really got this to stick in my mind, it liberated me. Like for real. It liberated me. If you are saying yes to something because you couldn't say no, if you say yes to something because you were afraid or scared to say no to it, if you say yes to something, you are automatically saying no to something else. So either way, you are saying no to something. So did you hear me? Did you hear me there? If you say yes to something, you are automatically saying no to something else. And here's what I mean. So let's say, for example, let's say in nursing school, if you have a 10 page paper to write, if you've got care plans to write and all these things, you've got tests to study for it, all these things going on, right? Like all the things you got going on in nursing school, if you Say yes to helping out at church on a weekend that you had planned to write that 10 page paper, you are automatically saying no that you are not going to write that 10 page paper. Does that make sense? Is that clicking for you? If this is clicking, please write love in the comments. I really want to know that this is totally making sense for you. So if you say yes to doing something, you are automatically saying no to something else so it doesn't matter in the first place. Because you were afraid. You were scared to say no to volunteering or going out on a Sunday night with friends or hanging out with family for whatever's going on. Because you were afraid to say no even though you said yes to that, you are now saying no to something else that was more important for. I hope this is making sense. I know we are actually broadcasting on Facebook as well as YouTube, so I know I've got some YouTube comments coming in. I know. Thank you so much, you guys, for being here. Everyone's saying love. Thank you. I'm so glad that this is making sense. If you say yes to something, you are automatically saying no to something else. And I really, really. What I want you to leave today knowing and remembering is that you need to be intentional about your yes and be intentional about your no. Because if you are saying yes to something, you are automatically saying no to something else and that may not have been intentional. Right. So, sure. You can for sure say yes to things that matter to you. I absolutely want you to say yes to things that matter for you. But I don't want you to automatically say yes to something that doesn't matter because that means that you are going to say no to something that does matter to you. And that is what's important here. So I know this is kind of a tough conversation to have. And I know I want to be your best friend. Right? I'm your nursing best friend. So I am not going to just sit here and talk about things that you know are light and fun all the time. I want to actually get into the hard stuff with you because that's what best friends are here for. Right? That's what I'm here for. And here's what I have learned over the past couple of months. I have learned that if I do not talk about the hard stuff, if I don't talk about these things with you, then you might feel like you're alone. Okay? So if I'm not talking about what I'm going through in life, the tough stuff, the tough stuff that's going on, the Stories that I've got, you know, that didn't go so well in my life or, you know, things that I hear that I, you know, I've got something to say about. If I don't talk about these difficult things, then you might feel alone and like no one else understands. And that is the last thing that I want to happen. Because, girlfriend, oh my gosh, life is tough. It is difficult and it is messy. It is so messy. And things happen to all of us. And I will be the first one to stand up here and raise my hand and tell you that I have said yes in terrible situations. I have said no in terrible situations. I have been so not intentional with my yes and with my no. So I totally, totally get if this is where you're at today, feeling super stressed, super overwhelmed, and thinking I have do not have my life together, right. I will be the first one to tell you that I am right there with you. And so that's exactly what I want to talk about today, is the yes and the no. So I'm going to tell you today, we're going to talk about hard things and it's going to be great. So there are really three things that I wanted to bring up today as examples to kind of get your wheels turning. I hope that these examples from my life can help you make your yes and make your no more intentional. As we go into 2019, it's a new year and I love new years. It's a very good time to kind of take pause and take a step back and plan ahead and make some goals about who you want to be in the new year. It's going to be great. And of course you're going to rock nursing school this term, right? Yes, you are. Thumbs up if you're going to rock nursing school this term. So the examples that I've gotten in my life about saying yes and saying no to things, there are really three main things that I have decided to say no to in 2019. Now the first one that I want to talk about for me personally is huge, is not doing anything past 9pm so if we've got family or friends that want to hang out in the evening, we don't do. I'm not gonna do anything past 9 o'. Clock. That is my solid no because I need sleep, you guys. My toddler wakes up at 5am pretty much every single morning, 5 or 5:30. And so it's really tough. Like if we are going to bed, like at 10 or 11, you know, it's hard to get Enough sleep. And I really, really, really need that sleep. So I'm going to say no to, to the things that come up. If it's past 9 o', clock, it is a hard no. It is a full stop. Like, I'm not going to do that. If it's past 9 o', clock, it's not happening even 8 o', clock, because I'm going to be in bed by nine. That is what I'm saying yes to. I'm going to be in bed by nine. And so I'm saying no to everything else that comes our way because I've got to do that. It's the only way that I can keep functioning, running all of this. You're chasing after a toddler every day, you know, man, you've got to do that. So if that's a good example for you, then use it. I really, really encourage you to take that one. Think about your sleep, think about your health habits and try to come up with a what is something you're gonna say no to so that you can say yes to something else? So say yes to sleep, say no to other things. Now the next thing that I want to talk about is not working or studying on Saturday. So Saturday really for us is the day to just be. Spend time with the family, just be together, hang out with Daniel, with our toddler, and to just be together as a family. So I personally have decided that Friday night I'm going to put my phone actually on airplane mode, put it away in a totally separate room. So I don't even, don't even think about it, don't even look at it, don't even, you know, anything. It's just gonna stay in there all day, like Friday night to Saturday night and that's where it's gonna be. So I am not even gonna work. I'm not gonna look at my phone. I'm not gonna do anything with it. That is kind of that boundary that I need to set up in order to make that happen. So that is my no. That is my hard no to working on Saturdays. So for 2019, that's not gonna be happening. So maybe for you, that would be a very good example as well. If you want to take a step back on weekends, put your phone somewhere else. I really like airplane mode. Just because you don't actually get any messages. It's actually very, very helpful that way. So you're not like getting anything. It's like totally. Your phone doesn't exist. It's like turned off. So, you know, turn off your Phone, if that's helpful for you. You just need a whole day to step back from nursing school. Just take a step back, take a day to relax, and then come back even stronger that next week. So I hope that example is helpful for you. Now, the third example I have that's also super, super important to us as a family is to saying no to a messy or dirty house. If you're in nursing school. I know you are. You know what I'm talking about. The kitchen table, the dirty sink, the wafts of dog hair on the floor. If you've got a dog. We have a German shepherd, and it's so hard to keep up with her sometimes. Oh, my gosh. So, seriously, I am saying no to a dirty house, even if that means now saying no to other things, because now I have to spend, like, a half hour a day to, you know, vacuum or do dishes or whatever. You know, we're not gonna let things build up and build up like we did when I was in nursing school. You guys. I was so, so bad at this. I know. Ugh. So if you know what I'm talking about, write love in the comments because, man, I know I'm not alone in this. I actually get messages from students all the time saying, I just cannot keep up with these things. Christina. Like, I totally get it, you guys. Totally, totally get it. So that is my Solid no for 2019 is that every single day. I've actually decided that during Daniel's nap, every single day, I'm gonna be cleaning whatever needs to be cleaned. So if that's like vacuuming one room for 15 minutes or, you know, whatever, Whatever, whatever at night or anything, I. You know, the house is going to stay clean. Toys are gonna get picked up. There's not gonna be clutter on the kitchen table. Like, I just cannot, cannot have that anymore. So that is my solid no. So I hope those examples help you to kind of think, get those wheels turning for some of the no's that you might need to, you know, kind of draw a line in the sand, put your foot down in 2019 in the new year, so that you can actually be your best self and show up the best way that you can for yourself, for your family in nursing school. Nursing school is tough. It takes your entire mental energy, your whole physical energy, pretty much all of your emotional energy, let's be honest. So you really have to make sure that you are in a place mentally, physically, emotionally, that's full, you know? And if you are spending so much time worried about what other People think if you are spending so much time worried about, you know, all the things that you have to do that are not a priority for you, you are not going to show up the best way that you can in nursing school for yourself. Because you are in nursing school for a reason, friend. You are in nursing school for a reason. God has put you here for a reason. You've got your talents, your passions, everything in your life has led you to this moment right here. You're in nursing school for a reason. Do not waste it. Do not waste it. Do not waste your time studying or waste time doing things that do not matter to you. And waste time, you know. Yeah. Waste time doing the things that do not matter to you. So you can't spend time doing the things that do, which is studying for nursing school, becoming the amazing nurse that I know you're going to be. So I hope those examples helped. Now, here's what I want you to do. I want you to take five minutes to do a little exercise for me. So just take five minutes. You can actually just. I'll talk, I'll go through them here. And then after this video plays, you can take your five minutes. Whatever works for you, or you can even do it while I'm talking. That's totally fine. But the first thing I want you to do is take five minutes to write down what are some nos that you're going to draw a line in the sand, put your foot down whatever whatever in 2019. What are some no's that you are going to decide about in 2019? What are some things that you're going to say no to? So some of my examples were right. Not having a dirty house, a messy house, or, you know, toys all over the place. Not going out anywhere past, you know, eight or nine o' clock so that I can be in bed by nine. That's a big one. And then another no for me is to not work or have my phone on me on weekends or definitely not on Saturdays. So maybe those would be similar to you if you've got a toddler for sure. So just take five minutes and write down some. Some things that you're going to say no to. What are you going to say no to? What things can you say no to that are not a priority for you? That can now give you space and energy to focus on the things that matter. So just take five minutes and write down some things. I would say at least three. So like, three to five sounds like a pretty good number. So write down three to five things that you are going to say no to. That will help you get give you space and mental energy to focus on the things that matter, which is nursing school. So maybe for you, right, it's not going out on weekends. Maybe for you it's making sure that your phone is off while you study. That's a really great no for a nursing school, right? You, you can't have all those distractions while you're studying. So maybe it's those things. Now here's the second part to this exercise is to talk about it. Tell your family. That is the most important thing. So you've got to loop in the people that are in your life and whom it matters to. So for example, if you are drawing a line in the sand and you say, you know what? I'm gonna be in bed by 9 o' clock like I am. Woohoo. Join the club. So if you are gonna be in bed by 9 o' clock like I am, then you've got to tell your family, right? That's something that the family needs to know because maybe you gotta get the kids in bed a little earlier. You know, you, your husband needs to know how the evening's gonna go. So talk to your family. That's the second step of this process is talk to your family. Loop in the people that need to be looped in on this. So what are some nos that you're going to draw a line in the sand? What are some things you're going to say no to? And then now step number two, you need to talk to the people that need to know about that. No. Does that make sense? I hope that's making sense. Now the third thing, the third step to this process is to now add it to your calendar or your planner or what have you. So there's not much that you could do if you're just gonna write these things down and tell people about it, right? You actually have to do it. And if you don't put it in your schedule, if you don't put it in your calendar, if you don't put it in your planner, then it's not going to happen. You haven't made the time to do it, right? So for example, if you are going to say no to other activities so that you can study, you've got to put your study time in your calendar. In your planner, you have got to put that in there so that you actually have blocked out the time. So you're not going to then fill out your calendar with other things that don't matter. You see what I'm saying, so make sure that the things that are important to you, you are on your calendar, in your planner, and those things are scheduled in your time. You've talked to your family about them, and this is the plan, and everybody knows it's the plan. So those are the three steps of this process. Take five minutes, write down three to five things that you are going to say no to in the new year to help you really set up those boundaries, not get stressed or overwhelmed about all the things you need to do during nursing school. Step number two is to tell your family. So tell your family about it. Make sure that everyone who needs to know about these things that they're looped in about it. Nobody's going to get upset when you go to bed at 9 o' clock or what have you. So make sure that anybody that needs to know about what's happening knows about what's happening. And then the third part of this process is to add it to your calendar. So again, everybody knows about it, everybody's on the same page, and you've actually scheduled the time to do it. Because sometimes it's very, very easy to go off and do other things and forget about all the intentions that we set and the goals we have for ourselves and all that stuff. So I hope this video helps. I'm going to scroll through these YouTube comments here because I think I saw some more coming in. We are broadcasting live to YouTube and to Facebook. So thank you so much, everybody for joining me. Thank you. I am super happy to be there. I know. Oh, my gosh. Oh, Mustafa says, yeah, relax, girl. I know. I get. Oh, my gosh, you guys. I get so energized over things that I'm so excited about, and this is definitely one of them. So I'm so, so excited to be here with you, so happy, and I feel so blessed that you've allowed me into your life and into your space to help you during nursing school. That's exactly what I'm here for. So I'm here to help you raise your grades and then have be able to spend more quality time with your family during nursing school. Because it's totally possible. If you haven't heard my story yet, I went to nursing school. I was super stressed out, super overwhelmed, just like. I know. Just like you feel like you are right now. And I took me along, took me a little while to come up with a really great study process and I finally figured it out. I feel like I found the key to nursing school, so. So I finally figured it out. And then I was able to take. I actually took every single Saturday off during nursing school, and that was the only way that I was able to survive. So all of these things, like setting that boundary of taking time off, you know, oh, my gosh, that was the only way I could survive during nursing school. Because so much is thrown at you, right? You know, you got care plans and papers and this and that, and the other instructors, like, oh, my gosh, like, everything, everything. It feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders when you're in nursing school. So I am here to help you raise your grades and spend more quality time with your family and have more personal time for yourself during nursing school. Because, girlfriend, it's totally possible. It's totally possible. I know because I did it. And now I'm teaching other nursing students just like you to do the same. We actually have our nursing SOS membership here community. We've got tons of students in there that I literally. I'm holding their hand through nursing school. You know, we've got so many resources in there, and our private Facebook group, that's a bonus. As for members of that membership community. So, like, literally, I. We have so much fun, and it's just so great to actually help nursing students along your journey. So thank you so much for allowing me to be here, and I really, really hope this was helpful for you. If you have any questions, leave a comment below and let me know your questions. And I will definitely make sure that I am hanging out after this video to answer all of those. And I hope you have a great rest of your week and a new Year's, because Now it's almost 2019, and it's a whole new year. Thank you so much, you guys. Thank you so, so, so much. Go become the nurse that God created only you to be. I'll see you next time. Bye. Bye.