From Camera-Shy to Camera-Confident | Deborah’s Video Confidence Challenge Breakthrough

I think when video challenge came, I was like, why am I not doing it? And I said to myself, let me commit to doing something because I've joined many things.

Yeah, absolutely. And as they say, it's very exciting to start something, and, and then once the going gets tough, it's very easy to quit also. But the most important thing is how can you persevere, how do you keep on going and go beyond the finish line, that's when you become a confident person. I mean, I always say that confidence is not— most of us are born with confidence, is earned by completing small, small, bigger challenges.

I was not stressing myself that I have to finish the task that I have done, so it was helping me in a way of achieving my, uh, goal in a timely manner. Yes, time management. It helped in time management or building the time management muscle to, uh, have a lot more reflection.

You're always into reaction mode and, and this and that going on, life is going on, uh, but very less time we spend on reflecting. And that is why when we design such a challenge, it gives a lot of emphasis on reflective question on short-term, medium-term, and long-term journey.

The second part, the second challenge I had was with respect to, um, vulnerability. I am not a social media person. I do not post. I do not— I try to keep myself— I'm a bit reserved.

Welcome everyone to this new series of video finisher interviews. So my name is Haritosh Srivastav. I am the founder and head coach of Confident Storytelling Hub, where we empower working professionals, entrepreneurs, and coaches to finally find their voice and to be able to speak and tell their story confidently to the world. In our community, we keep doing many challenges to help people break out of their comfort zone to achieve newer things. So one of the initiatives that we did last month was something called 21-Day Video Confidence Challenge. And this is part of the series where I am going to interview the participants who successfully completed the challenge. And, and this is where they are going to share their journey. So this is the first of the many. We have many participants who completed this. So I'm going to start by inviting the very first participants. Her name is Deborah. I'm going to get her. So welcome, Deborah. So excited to have you here.

Thank you, Haritosh Srivastav. Thank you for this opportunity. Uh, very grateful that I'm over here and I'm speaking to you.

Excellent, excellent. So we're going to talk about, uh, your journey, uh, but before we do that, I want you to tell, tell audience about yourself. So who is Debora? What, what have you done, etc., etc.?

Thank you. So I'm Debora, Debora Mascarenhas. I come from a very small village in India called Kothurim in Goa, but most of my life I've been in India, uh, but I'm in the UK for the past more than a decade. I have been in telecoms for over 15 years. So, and I am a solution architect in the telecom domain. That's my brief introduction. We will come to the next part, I guess, as soon as we go on this journey.

Absolutely. So yes, so the very next part is that how long have you been part of the Confidence Storytelling Hub?

To be honest, not very long. As you know, uh, just 2 months to be precise. I think it's on really just 2 months into this journey.

Yes, excellent. Okay, so the next, uh, question is all about, uh, I know you just joined when we were starting this Video Confidence Challenge, uh, and you participated, and now you have completed and we are doing this interview. So what has been your experience in part of this video confidence challenge that we did for the first time?

Haritosh Srivastav, to be honest, right, uh, when I joined, because it's a short period that I've just joined, I wasn't sure that I will commit, I will be part of it actively. And I mentioned to you, because I'm traveling as well, I will be on holidays. So I wasn't very sure with how much I can give and how much I will be able to pick from this. But when the video challenge started— before the video challenge, there was this challenge that you were doing for early morning, 6 o'clock, 6 AM routine, StorySpark. And that did instigate me to join in. Participate simply because I wanted to be part of it and improve my skill, improve my journey. But when the video challenge came, that was my actual opportunity, I think. I think when video challenge came, I was like, why am I not doing it? And I said to myself, let me commit to doing something because I've joined many things. Even out of this scope. I've joined many things but not completed or not followed up. So that was my experience of joining, and I think it is a very fulfilling journey for me that I've joined it. I've taken part with the idea or with the intention that I wanted to complete it. And I've done it.

So yes, you've done it.

Uh, so my journey or my fulfillment is that I have completed that, that task.

Yes, absolutely. And as they say, it's very exciting to start something, and, and then once the going gets tough, it's very easy to quit also. But the most important thing is how can you persevere? How do you keep on going and go beyond the finish line, that's when you become a confident person. I mean, I always say that confidence is not— most of us are born with confidence, is earned by completing small, small, bigger challenges. So I'm very sure, uh, people will be excited and interested to know how was your journey? Were there any challenges that you faced during the challenge? During this whole Video Confidence Challenge? And if you face any challenge, how did you overcome that?

I think there were two parts. One was committing, like doing the videos every day. Okay, we could not do it every day. But one thing I realized, I have to do it. Yes. Okay. The two points are committing and vulnerability. Okay, so I'll come to the second part as well. But the first part is committing, right? Sometimes I used to not keep the videos. I would not be able to do it that same day because I was traveling from India to UK, or I was busy with work. I could not finish it. But I made it a point that the very next day I completed at least the previous day and that day, not keeping it longer than 2 days. In that way, I will not bulking it up. I will not stressing myself that I have to finished the task that I've done. So it was helping me in a way of achieving my goal in a timely manner. Yes, time management. It helped in time management or building the time management muscle or skill. One thing I saw in my work profile as well was because I was consistent in one part of storytelling, In the work, I was sometimes— I used to procrastinate. And what happened with that is like, let me do a little, little work, and I used to be able to finish that task. You know, it helped me in my work side as well. So that was helpful for me. Now, the second part, the second challenge I had was with respect to vulnerability. I am not a social media person. I do not post. I do not— I try to keep myself— I'm bit reserved. But when you put that challenge of—

you—

we had a leaderboard.

Yes.

And the points— and one of the challenge on one of the days was put it on a social media platform and you'll get 100-point bonus.

Yes.

I was like, oh my God, what do I do? I don't have an IG account or Instagram account. Uh, the only one I have is LinkedIn. But then I thought to myself, and this would be my first step, to display myself as somebody strong— not strong as such, but my authentic self. That I'm taking my first step. Let me see, it's a small step. Let me see what happens. And that way I put it on LinkedIn. And to be To my surprise, Haritosh Srivastav, I got a lot of appreciation from my work colleagues. I also realized there are lots of people who wouldn't even dare to do such stuff. But me doing that is just one step ahead of what I may want to do in the long run. So yes, these are my two challenges, but I've overcome them very nicely. Glad I have done it.

I love that. I love, I love both the parts, and I love how you structured your answer as well. One part is about being able to do things consistently or in a timely manner, and I think, uh, I believe more than time management, it's generally about priority and focus management, that when you prioritize something, when you focus, you make it a point to do that, and we could see that clearly And the second part is you're being able to come across as authentic person and stretching your comfort zone a little bit. That's how you become little bit more confident. If you are in your cocoon, then you won't grow. And that's where we were put— I was putting that, okay, if you want 100 points, you need, you need to go and post it on one of the social media. So I'm glad you did that. Very, very happy for you. Now let's move on to the larger outcome of, uh, this whole— so during the journey, what do you think was your main aha or breakthrough moment that happened in this challenge?

I wouldn't say that there was one aha moment. Uh-huh. Give the analogy of an onion, how we peel an onion, right?

Yes.

Layer after layer after layer. So this journey, these 21 days was something like that for me. Wow. Every day I could get one small point which made me go further in what I wanted to do. What would be my next step, in other words. So it helped me one day, maybe I found, okay, creating a video, maybe second day lighting, maybe third day voice modulation, or, you know, and that way. And your questions were so good, Haritosh Srivastav, that it made you think. It made you think long term, short term, and how, because when you ask questions to yourself, answers, but you have to ask the right question. It's always about asking the right question. And your questions helped directing the, the vision I had. So for me, that aha moment is like being— I knew I wanted to be public, I wanted to do public speaking, and that's why I had joined Toastmasters and I've joined storytelling as well.

Yes.

And so the aha moment, or the end goal at this point in time of my life, is like I want to be a motivational speaker and how I'm going to deliver that were the key points that I've received in, in this video challenge.

So excellent. I think this was amazing that you said the Aha moment of the analogy of peeling and finding and reflecting. I think I firmly believe that, no, we need to have a lot more reflection. We are always into reaction mode and and this and that going on, life is going on, uh, but very less time we spend on reflecting. And that is why when we design such a challenge, it gives a lot of emphasis on reflective question on short-term, medium-term, and long-term journey. So excellent. Now the one of the most important question is, what do you think has been the impact of now that you have completed this challenge, what do you see is the impact in your journey?

Impact, uh, or I think goal. I would say the goal that I have, uh, got, or I deduced, is me being a motivational speaker.

Wow.

And I think That being clear now is I need to work on getting that delivered. And it's my promise to myself, I believe, that I am going to be a motivational speaker. Now, what is the content? That will come as the— and I think I have a fair idea what I want to talk about.

Yeah.

But so in the next step would then be creating or making time— or not, or creating time in terms of how I'm delivering them. I need to be consistent. Only then it's going to be a fruitful outcome. I'm going to reach there.

Excellent. I'm, I'm so happy you are able to find what you need to work upon, a, a life goal for you of becoming a motivational speaker. And that is excellent. I think I, I am so humbled, and I'm so glad that you took this challenge and used it as a tool to go inward and come up with something as beautiful as that.

So my appreciation as well.

Yeah, thank you. So what is your message for anyone who wants to go on this journey of building confidence and learning about storytelling?

So I have been looking at lots of podcasts. Okay, one of them is by Wayne Gyan.

Yeah.

And he's a good public speaker, you may have heard. One of the things that he says, and it's very, it's very to the point, is he says, you are only as good as you can communicate.

Absolutely.

And if we keep that in mind, it's like I can speak English, not a problem. But if I can't communicate what I want to say in the time frame that I have, or in a storytelling way, or a connection way, then it's of no point. Isn't it? So I started my journey. There are a few points, one step at a time. But for anybody who wants to join in, I think you already know why you want to join. But you have to always take that first step. Yes, you will hesitate, but take that first step just to improve your connections, your, your business, your growth, even for normal communication within your family, your friends. Because sometimes it's like, okay, to a certain level you are where you are, but if you want to grow, then you have to take that first step, and it will come. It needs to come from you.

Absolutely, it has to come from you. I love that. And yes, so the most important question, and Would you recommend anyone to join Confidence Storytelling House?

Would I recommend anyone else? Oh, yes, definitely.

I would recommend.

Yes, yes, yes. Everybody should be joining, actually. I'll tell you why. The reason being that when we tell stories, we have lots of stories for a start. We— and every moment is a story for us, but we don't realize that every moment is a story. So imagine if we have to rehearse them before telling it to somebody else. You have already articulated or found out faults so that when you tell it to somebody, it is more appealing and it is more— you are confident in what you have told. Yeah, so it's about how do you structure it in a nice way for them to be for it to be perceived correctly, perceived in a way they can engage with you.

So yes, yes, thank you so much. And as I said earlier, Debra, your journey was very inspiring, and that's probably the reason I chose you as the first participant of this, uh, Video Confidence Finisher interview, because the way you came up— and I know when you started the journey you were trying to catch up, but then when you put that resolution, no, I have to do it, I have to come. I think you were among top 3, top 4, uh, even though it doesn't matter which rank you were, but I think it's all about being better than who you were yesterday. And I think you really, really have improved. So congratulations to you once again and wishing you all the best.

Thank you very much, Haritosh Srivastav. Very humbled and also grateful that you kept this challenge It was an awesome challenge for me to take that next step. It's always one step at a time, as we say, and this was that one step from last month to this month. It's a huge improvement in the journey that I have as a, as a person, as a person who is self-improving and growing. Thank you very much.

You're welcome, and thank you. And for audience, this was one of the many interviews that we are going to have. So today was Deborah. We'll have another interview, so stay tuned. But as I say every time, that the world right now is full of distraction, right now is full of miscommunication, and one of the best ways to come out of itself is to tell better stories, because the world needs better storytellers, and it starts from me and you. So I invite you to come and be part of this journey of storytelling. I'll see you in this next video. Take care, stay safe, and stay blessed.