I Stopped Trying to Impress and Started Adding Value - Here's What Happened

Recording the stories, it becomes like a journaling for my life. Even if I'm not able to impress by my speech, I should be providing some value to the listener.

And I think this is what the core of the speaking and communication is, because a lot of time we feel shy or fearful because we are focusing too much on ourselves versus thinking about what value we can provide, what is the lesson that I can share.

I would say visibility is the new currency.

Yes.

One thing which I got out of all this challenge is if you want to grow in your life Okay, you need to connect with people. So if somebody wants to excel in their life, if somebody wants to become better in their relationships, they need to know how to—

Hey everyone, welcome to another Finisher Challenge. As you already know, we have done a number of interviews where every month in Confidence Storytelling Hub we do a 21-day challenge where members go beyond their comfort level, create a lot of videos, and came out victorious. So, and for them, I like to interview them personally over here and share with so that we all can learn from them, we all can learn from their experience and their insight. So in that series, I have another person, Mr. Tanay, who is Again, last month was amazingly doing all the achievements and was able to successfully complete that. So let's bring him on. So welcome, Tanay. How are you doing?

Thanks, Haritosh Srivastav, for bringing me here and taking an interview. This would be my first interview. I haven't given like any interview. Yeah.

All right. First of the many.

Awesome.

So tell us a little bit about yourself. Where are you from? What you do, etc., etc.?

So I was born in a small town called Kalpi. It's a birthplace of Ved Vyas, sir. Yeah, it was destiny which brought me here. So I, in my childhood, I studied in 3 different cities and from teachers from 3 different nationalities. So I studied from a Chinese teacher, I studied from a US teacher, I studied from a Canadian teacher. And after that, studying in like English medium. I switched to a Hindi medium from a Christian school to Saraswati Vidya Mandir. So I had like all kinds of flavors in my education.

Wow, amazing. So what do you do now?

So I'm a Director of Technology at Xenia. Here I am leading process automation. Excellent. So I'm making people's life easy by automating the work which they used to do manually.

Very nice, very nice. And I think that is very, very helpful, the good use of technology. Awesome. So tell us, how long have you been part of Confident Storytelling Hub?

So I have been part of Confident Storytelling Hub from last one year. I remember 11th October I joined Confident Storytelling Hub. And there's an interesting story. I have taken my son for a drawing competition. I was sitting outside in a, in a car I know you from like past experience with Toastmasters. So I just called you. I don't have any expectation what I'm going to get or what's there. I just call you and ask for help because I was going through a rough patch in my job. So I just called you and I joined without even giving a thought what's there in store. But it has been like a wonderful journey throughout. And I learned a lot from being a part of it.

Thank you. I do remember because I was— when you messaged me first, I was in Chennai attending my mentor's conference, and then I suddenly got the message and said, okay, I'll be back next week and then we can plan. So that's how we did that. Awesome. So let's now talk about this challenge that we did. We did the StoryPro Challenge last month, uh, where on— for 21 days you recorded a video, you shared in the group, and you had lot of interaction. So tell us about what was your experience like being part of this challenge.

So, uh, there is one quote which I want to share, that you cannot become successful without being in discomfort. That's what happened in this 21-day challenge. I, I was not able to manage my time, I was not able to record regularly, but this time I, I was determined that I will do it. And even before the story challenge started, I did recorded 21 stories to make confident that I can do it. Wow. After that, I was— I thought, how I'm going to get my time. So I started— as soon as I returned from my yoga classes, I used to attend, record a story and send it to you. That's how I would be like consistent. And this technique is called like stacking, time stacking, where you stack like one habit after another. Yeah, yeah, that's, that's how I was able to achieve it. It gave me like new perspective. Even when I am recording the stories, it becomes like a journaling for my life. Because I'm able to reflect on, on how I behave, how I, how I think, how I react to different situations, because I have to record stories from my, my life.

Absolutely. Awesome. And I do remember, yes, you participated in previous challenges as well. But you were not able to complete that. You, you were short by few videos, but yeah, this time you did it. But you know, in every challenge there is always something, right? When you have a story, you have a conflict, right? So generally when I ask people, they do have some challenges, one or two challenges that they face during the challenge. So did you face that? And, and if you faced, how did you overcome those?

One of the challenge was about shyness. I was not very extrovert on recording videos and all. I understand that when you speak, you have to impact best or influence. But there's one, one thing which is more important than all these three things, that is to provide value to your, to your listeners.

100%.

So I thought, even if I'm not able to impress by my speech, I should be providing some value to the listener. That's how I take this challenge. That basically removed my hesitation. I am not good at speaking because every time I am recording, I have a mission that I have to provide some value to the listeners.

That's amazing. And I think this is what the core of the speaking and communication is, because a lot of time we feel shy or fearful because we are focusing too much on ourselves versus thinking about what value we can provide. What is the lesson that I can share? So I'm so glad you got the right mindset and I think that would have helped you in this challenge. So tell us about some of the, you know, aha moment, breakthrough moment of this journey.

There are like lot of aha moments. Doing this challenge, I used to take whole night to prepare for a 5-minute speech. I was part of like Toastmasters. I was not able to complete the module because it was like too much strain on my mind on giving a speech. Now it is more natural. I know I have to provide value and then impressing someone else is like a secondary thought.

Very nice.

Time management has improved a lot. I know how to manage your time. It built a lot of confidence as well. Now when I speak into meetings, I am more confident. Before that, I used to mumble and what you say, eat some of the word in mouth itself, not coming out clearly. Now I'm like more confident and like speaking more clearly to, to audience, and I, I feel that confidence inside me as well.

Yes, I think, yes, very well said that confidence is an inside-out job. So you first feel confidence inside and that's when it starts to exude outside. Amazing. And I can very well vouch that I have seen your journey last one year, how you have improved, and then this challenge has been amazing. I think you already talked about the impact, but I would love to see what have been the tangible impact of doing and completing this challenge. And I know you're part of the next challenge as well, which is the September challenge, Speak to Lead. So what has been the impact of participating in these challenges?

So one thing I understand that visibility matters. While you are connecting with your friends, you need to be visible to them. In corporate, you have to be visible to your bosses. Even in the community itself, you need to be visible. Yes, you need to be posting messages, you need to be encouraging others. I would say visibility is the new currency. Yes, one thing which I got out of all this challenge is if you want to grow in your life, okay, you need to connect with people. Now world has changed a lot. Previously it was more like a— when it was not online, like people used to meet over coffee shops and all, and world was very much limited. Now everyone is expecting that they see you every day. Yes. And with all this challenge, I'm more camera friendly. I know how to face a camera. I'm able to better connect with audiences. And the next thing which I want to build is on the— build my profile on LinkedIn, create that visibility. The next challenge which I want to take.

Absolutely. Thanks for the suggestion. We'll work on that. But yes, very well said. And I'm part of BNI and there is a formula called VCP, visibility leads to credibility, which ultimately leads to profitability. So if you're not visible, your credibility is doubted. And if your credibility is doubted, then profitability will always be impacted. Awesome. So now let's talk about the audience and you also touched base upon that. Now it's about the value. It's about the audience. So what is your message for anyone who wants to go on this journey? Of building confidence, sharing their stories, speaking in public, etc.?

So you need to work on your personality before becoming a personality. So that's the mantra which, which I got from somewhere. But to build that personality, you need to be confident, you need to be visible, you need to articulate in a better way so that you can pass your messages. And when it comes to storytelling, It's one of the most wonderful medium. Because when you are working on one skill, it's not only the one skill which you are working on. It's like multiple skills you are working on. You are able to articulate yourself better. You are able to speak from your heart. And when you speak from your heart, you are able to better connect with people. And when it comes to storytelling, there is a structure as well. So you are able to put your thoughts into more structured way. So if somebody wants to excel in their life, if somebody wants to become better in their relationships, they need to know how to tell stories. So I can see that, that impact happening in, in my personal life as well as professional life. So this is the one skill which can impact every aspect of your life. So I would highly recommend anyone, like, if you want to do—

Thank you, awesome. And the last question, the cheesy question that I always say, that, okay, you have been part of Confident Storytelling Hub for almost a year now. Would you recommend people to join and why?

Definitely, I will recommend everyone. As I already said, that it is going to impact every, every aspect of your life. In the morning itself, I was talking to my wife and said that I have recorded more than 40-50 videos. Wow! Should I put it somewhere on a on a drive that could become my personal memories, which I can go and iterate and, and reflect. And it is a wonderful idea. I'm not very good at journaling on paper, but it has already created a journal for me. If you want to create a journal, if you want to connect better with, with your family, with your colleagues, then this is definitely a platform. I have been part of Toastmasters for long. Toastmasters is a platform where it is about improving your, your speaking skills. But first you have to learn your speech and storytelling, and this is a platform where you learn that, that skill. So I would highly recommend anyone like to join like Storytelling Hub.

Thank you so much, Tana, and that was amazing. And I still remember you sending videos at 1 AM in the night and And sometimes used to wake up in the morning like, why this guy so crazy? But this is all how it pays out. I think I have had my own crazy days, but I very well agree to that. Now you start creating a record. Uh, my mentor says record your journey. This is part of your journey. And this is where 2 years, 3 years, 5 years, 10 years down the line, when you come back and see yourself in these videos, you'll be like, wow, this is how it started. So definitely record that. And if you want to go forward, if you are comfortable, then you can create YouTube channel, put it on LinkedIn. There are so many platforms. So thank you so much once again, Tanay, for participating, for leading and inspiring others, and you are still continuing to do so. So I hope to have a Hall of Fame interview once you complete 3 challenges as well. Uh, best wishes to you. Story power to you.

Thanks, Haritosh Srivastav, for all your time and guidance which you have provided. It's not only about storytelling, it's about like changing the personality. I thank you from my heart for whatever you have been doing. And one quality I want to point out, your consistency is amazing. Thank you. I got bored pretty much quickly, but that's the one skill which I want to learn from you is being consistent and making progress in your life. Thanks, Haritosh Srivastav, for all your time.

Thank you so much. Wishing you all the best. And as we say in community, story power to you.