Dean Graziosi Weekly Wisdom #303 - What do you really want?

Hey, everybody. Dean Graziosi, welcome to the Weekly Wisdom. I have a message today that could be one of the most important things I ever shared. Okay? Every week in my head, it's important you know, every single. I'm going to digress from it. Every Sunday night, I look at my kids and I'm like, this was the best weekend of my entire life. I say it every single Sunday. And my kids are always like, how could this be the best weekend? Last weekend was I said, no, they get better. There's nothing I can do. They're better every week. And I'll say to my daughter or my son, I'll be like, I love you more today than I've ever loved you. My daughter getting a little older. She's seven now. She'll be like, so, did you not love me when you were born? I'm like, no, I loved you when you were born as much as I thought you could love somebody. And I can't believe it continues to grow. And that's why I say each week or a lot of times, this is the best one. Because to me, this is so. As you can see, probably in the last three to five months, I've been on a journey, and I've been on a journey to dissect success, to figure out what true fulfillment is. I wrote a book eight years ago, New York Times bestseller called Totally Fulfilled. I hope that you've read it. It's a really great book. But I read that. Now I'm like, oh, I've matured so much since then, even though I know so many of you love it and people all around the world do. But I'm on a deeper journey than ever before, trying to find out how I can inspire and help more people. How can I get you engaged? And if it's real estate, wonderful. And if it's not, engage in your life. Get plugged in. Not be on autopilot on a life you don't like. It's like flying the same way every day, and you don't like the path, but you're just, ah, this is as good as it gets. No, it's not as good as it gets. There's a whole other level of life, and I want you to discover it. So if you don't have the time, which I barely do, I'm digesting at least a book a week, trying to do two a week, and I'm trying to get up to three a week. I'm on a mission right now, and I want to deliver this juice, this energy to You. So I literally read four different books in the last three weeks, and all this knowledge is coming in wisdom. But one thing really stood out that I wanted to share with you today. And it happened on Tony Robbins stage. The first time I ever went, Tony and I became friends. He said, come to lunch. We went to lunch. He's like, come to the event tomorrow. I'm like, I'm kind of busy. He's like, come to the event tomorrow. He's a big guy. You kind of do what Tony says. I go to the event. So thankful I did. I got there. At first, I'm like, yeah, I'll sit up front. Thanks, Tony. And everybody's jumping around. Within a half hour, I'm high fiving, massaging the person, having the time of my life, and just really. He hit my soul. He hit my heart. And we're beyond friends because of it. And I love watching him change so many people's lives. But I want to share one thing. This is relevant to you. With everything I'm reading, Combine that. There was a gentleman. When Tony does date with Destiny, he literally asks if there's anybody in the audience that's thinking about suicide. Pretty tough question to ask. And Tony says, I'm guessing about 10 with the size of this audience, nine people raised their hand. This gentleman raises his hand, and Tony walks out in the audience, gets right up to him and says, can you tell me what's going on in your life? He's like, well, my mom was sick when I was young, so I quit college and decided to take care of her for a year. And he said, a year turned into 20 something years, and she lasted, and I was there taking care of her. And he's like, I never dated. I didn't go out, and now my mom passed away. And he said, I am the person who gets made fun of at the office. I don't know how to dress. I've never been with a woman. I've never even kissed a woman. I don't know how to date. I've tried online dating, and I embarrass myself. There's no purpose in this life. I go to work, I get nothing. I don't want to be here anymore. So Tony does some things that are completely shocking. I wanted to go up and hug the guy, but Tony was right. He's the one who knows how to do this. Tony shocked him and said, all right, that story would make me want to kill myself. How long you been telling that crap story? And that's only done not because he doesn't care. He wants to shock him out of this state of, like, getting into it, right? So long story short, what I want to share with you is this. Tony does some things. He gets him up on stage and he gets two chairs, and he puts a chair over here. And he puts a chair over here. And he puts a whiteboard here. And he puts a whiteboard over here. And this is the lesson for today. He says to him, okay, I hear all the things you're going through. Tell me what you don't want. So Tony writes. Really sloppy. If you've ever been to his event, you can't even read what he says. He says, what don't you want? And the guy says. He says, I don't want to be alone. I'm gonna just scribble. I'm not gonna write all this out. I'm just gonna tell you. And this is how fast Tony says, I don't want to be alone. I don't want to get made fun of. I don't want to feel insecure. I don't wanna. I don't wanna be in a job I hate. And this guy goes on, and Tony can't write as fast as what he doesn't want. He doesn't want to be sad at night. He doesn't want to feel that he's facing the world all by himself. He doesn't want to feel like a weirdo when he goes. He literally said weirdo when he goes to a party and leaves insecure. And Tony's just writing and scribbling like this. And Tony's making a mess. And he's like, whoo. Okay. So he gets Tony. Tony gets him up, comes over to this other chair, sits him in the other chair, and he says, what do want? What do you want? He says, okay, tell me what you want. And the guy sits there and goes, I don't want to be alone anymore. Tony goes, ah, ah, no, no, no. That's on this list. That's what you don't want. You don't want to be alone. Okay, tell me this. He sits, he thinks. He says, I don't want to get made fun of anymore. Tony goes, that's what you don't want. This gentleman could not say for minutes, it seemed like an hour, what he wanted. So think about that. That's like getting in your car and you're going to go on a trip. And you get in the car and the family's in the car, the kids are in the back, and you say, we're going on a trip. We're not going to go to Florida. Let's go. Well, where the hell are you going? And then I combine that with everything I'm reading and knowing my personal life and the things I've manifested and thought about. When you think about what you don't want, if you think about, I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to be alone, what happens, you are alone because what you put your attention on is what you get. This poor guy did not have a little of what he wanted. Finally, he said, I want to be in a relationship. Tony said, hallelujah, he wants something. What kind of girl do you want? He went, oh, I don't know. He didn't even. He wanted a relationship. He barely knew he wanted a relationship. When he said he wanted a relationship, he didn't know what kind of girl, what color hair, how old, what she did for a living. Do you want somebody who's positive, negative, what? He literally spent so many years thinking about what he didn't want. All he kept doing is compounding and manifesting what he didn't want. And I watched this guy's life change when he did simply one thing, made a list of what he wanted. And Tony said to him, and then again, all the things that I've done in my own personal life. What if you woke up tomorrow and made sure you didn't think about what you didn't want? You just envisioned what you wanted and it was coming true. Tomorrow will be the same, no matter what you tell your brain. If you're in debt, if you have an illness right now, if you don't feel the best, you're going through a divorce or a troubled relationship, or you're in a dead relationship and you don't know how to fix it. Here's the thing. If you focus on what you don't want, it's still going to be there either way. But what if you focus on making that relationship, finding a spark or maybe ending something that's really bad, or finding somebody new? Or focus on, yes, I'm in debt right now, but I'm going to focus on where I want to go when I'm not out of debt. Because again, tomorrow will be there and you will be living in the moment you're in. And you have a choice. Do I want to focus on what's wrong and what I don't want to, or do I want to focus on what I do want? That was such a powerful thing when I got to watch that firsthand. And I watched him go from this guy in a state of wanting to kill himself, writing what he wanted. And Tony went deep on him. Do you know, 15 minutes later he was up on stage. They spiked his hair. They rolled up his sleeves. He was on stage dancing. Like I had never seen the smile. It was probably the big. He said it was the most fun he had ever had in his life only because he stopped thinking for just one minute what he didn't want and started thinking what he did. So my challenge to you this week is how many things are on your I don't want list that are causing you to get exactly that. And I want you to delete that list and I want you to make the do want list and try each day this week to focus on what you want. Even if you're going through hell, even if you're in a tough time in your life, focus on what you want and watch how it uplifts you and can take you on another level. I'm going to hopefully take you on a really amazing journey over the next couple months as I'm on this journey myself. I hope you'll join me. I'm Dean Graziosi. I'll talk to you next week. And if you're at itunes, make sure you go to deansfreebook.com that's deansfreebook.com get my latest two books. If you're@dingraziosi.com, you can grab them right up here. Talk to you next week.