Focus on Yourself and Reach Your Full Potential!

It takes another level of thinking, another level of passion, another level of feeling uncomfortable and being disturbed with where you are to move. It's the spaceship. It takes all the energy to get it, like 100ft off the ground. Once it's out of the atmosphere, it hits a little button and goes fast, but it takes all that energy get off the ground. I love sharing the breakthroughs that I'm having, the things that I learn in my business, whether it's a breakthrough I have in the three M's, right? Mindset, marketing, and momentum. I just believe those three M's are so important. Because if we don't have the right mindset, we're not gonna do anything in our lives to go the next level. We're gonna get to the first obstacle, the first barrier, and be like, oh, this is really tough. I don't know if it's gonna work for me. Let me go back to what I know. If you were happy with what you know or where you were, you'd be there. You wouldn't be here today. You'd be doing something way different today than spending this time with me. So we always have to work on our mindset, and it is a muscle, and we have to work that muscle out every single day, right? Just like going to the gym, you don't get in good shape by going over the weekend. You got to go. You need spaced repetition, and that's really what inner circle is. It's spaced repetition reminding you, in some cases. Listen, in so many cases, guys, you've already heard some of what I'm sharing. So we want to work on our mindset, we must work on our marketing, right? Whether you're marketing yourself to get a boost in your career or get a promotion or starting your own business or scaling. Scaling your own business or our KBB family going to another level, if we don't work on our marketing, if you build it, they will not come, right? I don't have to repeat myself on that, right? We must work on our marketing. And I'm always going to be that reminder too. Because what we'll do in our businesses, if marketing is something that we don't love, we'll go, oh, yeah, let me work on this. Let me get to marketing. You know, I'll do the marketing tomorrow. Let me change the color. Let me make it longer. Let me make it bigger. Let me make it brighter. Let me make it better. Let me change the color of my logo. Let me. Let's do the font different. Let's adjust the page. I'll create a whole new module. That's what I'll do this month. If you don't obsess and learn to love marketing and we allow ourselves to go in other directions, then we'll have a really good idea and we'll wonder why other people in our space are doing well and we're not, right? Did you ever see somebody go, wow, my product's better than that. Why are they doing so well? Because they're marketing, because they're selling, because they're making an impact. And when we shift that mindset, like you know, I always talk about maybe too much is selling is service. And if you don't love what you do so much, then step up what you do to absolutely love it and then know that you're not serving people if you don't get it in their hands. And then the last part that we do is momentum, right? How do we keep the momentum of the right mindset, the momentum of the marketing? And that's why I try to mix it up. Something that hit me this month that was pretty like in my heart. I heard a story once where if you had a million dollar racehorse, right? Think about this. If you had a million dollar racehorse, would you, would you make it stressed out? Would you overwhelm it to the point where it couldn't even function? Like so many things going on at once. Would you feed it water all the time? Would you give it crappy food? Or would you give it really good food, right? Would you beat it? Like would you make it feel bad about themselves? Would you put it in a, like, think of all the things you would do for a million dollar racehorse. But we will have self talk on, oh my God, I'm missing the opportunity again. I'm too old, I'm too slow. We'll forget to drink water, we'll eat crappy food, we'll talk negative like we wouldn't do it if we owned a million dollar racehorse. But you are the multimillion, the hundred million, the billion dollar racehorse. And we only have one shell here and one soul and one thought process. And sometimes we'll treat so many people better and forget this, Kids don't become again. If you're not a parent, that's okay. Just look through this lens. Kids don't do what you say. Kids become who you are. Think about that, right? They don't do what you say. It's like you tell them not to cheat on their test, but if you talk about cheating on your taxes at the dinner table, don't get mad at them when they cheat on their test, right? Like that's just the way things go. So they don't do what we say. They become who we are. So I want you to look through the lens of the things we do or the things we could be doing when someone else is watching. So think about it this way. And I'm in the happiest relationship of my life. I'm married to my best friend. I think she's the most beautiful woman in the world. I fall more in love with her every day. But that wasn't always the case. And I'm not going to go deep in it because I shared with some of you I messed up on past relationships. I went through a divorce. And I could say that now because I'm in this great place. But it wasn't fun. Especially wasn't fun for my children, right. It scared me to death. I had anxiety. Like the worst anxiety I'd ever had in my entire life. Like crippling anxiety when I was worried about my kids. And would they be able to adapt and would they be fragmented and would they have to be one person for their mom and one person for their dad and all. I worried about everything possible. But do you know what? The one thing that allowed me to make finally make the decision and my ex wanted the relationship over too. It wasn't a one decision. I had lived in the guest room for a long time and we found out a way to be co parents. And everybody's got their story, right? But I have to tell you this question. The question I want to ask you guys and what I'm going to talk about today is, you know, the one thing that, that really made the difference. It had been years, I mean a whole handful of years since at least five years since we gave each other a kiss, held hands, were romantic, slept in the same room and all those types of things. Listen, I never talked about relationships back then. I talked about business, marketing, impact, sales, personal development. I didn't talk about relationships because mine wasn't so great. We had a good friendship, we never fought. But you know what got me is a dear friend of mine said, I gotta ask you something, Dean. I feel like you and the mom of my children, you guys are doing something. You think you're keeping this all together for the children, right? When my daughter's name is Brianna and Brody, my two kids that were. Then he said to me, when they grow up, how would you feel if they had the same exact relationship you guys are in? And that freaking floored me. It Floored me. She said, do you want, you think, you want your daughter not to be in a relationship where you're friends and there's no hand holding, there's no love, there's no, you know, we go to a restaurant and I sit with one and you sit with the other and all this kind of stuff. And when he said that, I literally went and talked to my ex and shared that with her. And she said, let's, we have to end this. And we figured out a way to do it amicably and we put the kids first. And she's a dear friend and, you know, thank God it worked out in a really amazing way for everybody. She's the happiest she's ever been in her life. The happiest, right. And so am I. But I have to tell you, looking through that lens of no more bullshit, do I really want my kids to emulate and be in the same situation? Now, my kids get to see their dad in love every day, hold hands every day, kiss every day, walk in the room. And my wife is the most important human being on this planet to me, right? They get to see this connection. And I watch my kids light up when they see their dad holding hands, kissing. They're like always smiling, always laughing, and they see what's possible. They're by example. So I'm sharing that with you because I want you to frame. I want to frame this day. Is. What about in your career? Are you in a job or in something that's not kind of filling your soul or allowing you to make the economic impact on your family that you'd like, but it's good enough, it's okay. I mean, you'll start that business sooner or later. You'll launch KBB when time allows, or, you know, you'll get there, but for now, it's okay. I'm not saying go out and quit, but what I'm saying is looking through that same lens, would you want your children to be in that same situation? Right? Like the million dollar racehorse? Why is it okay that you want to give everything to your child? I know I do. I want my children to be richer, smarter, better looking, happier, joyful. I want them to be thousand times better than me. I want. I want them to go, oh, Dean was 1.0, his kids are 4.0, his grandchildren are 6.0. Oh my God. By the time we get to my great grandchildren, I want them to make fun of what a pathetic, weakling loser I was. Like, that's what I hope, right? If we Want that for them so much. And if you're not a parent, it's okay. You can still feel those same emotions. You can understand what we're talking about here. If we want that for them, then why the hell don't we deserve it for us, right? Like how do we pierce this heart? How do we pierce this self doubt? How do we pierce the thinking that we have that got us here? Our best thinking got us right here. It takes another level of thinking, another level of passion, another level of feeling uncomfortable and being disturbed with where you are to move. It's the spaceship. It takes all the energy to get it like 100ft off the ground. Once it's out of the atmosphere, it hits a little button and goes fast, but it takes all that energy to get off the ground. So my goal in some of my trainings each month is to give you that burst of energy to get done today and go, screw it. I'm frickin doing this. Like nothing is gonna stop me. And I know so many of you are massively successful. This isn't about, oh, you're pathetic. And this, it's about where you are. You know, there's another level. That's all it is. And it doesn't mean that it's never enough. Listen, God didn't put us on this earth to settle. I don't think. I think at the end of our life, if we had the opportunity to talk to our maker, he's not gonna say, I'm so glad you found your groove at 24 years old and kind of settled for another 70 years. Like, that's not what he wants. That's not what we're designed for. I always say Dale Carnegie's quote, my favorite one by him, he said, the biggest plight of the human race is knowing you have more potential and you're not using it. Like you say that, you're like, yes, right? So how do we trick ourselves into knowing that we deserve this? We deserve to take uncomfortable action, to fail forward and to figure it out. Because if you think about that, how are we with, I know this is far away from business and stuff, but how are we with kind of our inner peace, like making amends with ourselves? We help our kids solve problems. We help our kids not have regrets. We help our kids not have enemies or let go of pain. Like we, Maybe I'm wrong, but like we, wherever we are, we want what's best for them. We know, we've studied it. If you're a part of this group, you're studying personal Growth. You're studying letting go. You're studying focusing on solutions. You're. You're doing all this while simultaneously, internally, you might be fighting with yourself and still have that person that you need to forgive, or forgive yourself for the mistakes in the past, or forgive yourself for procrastinating, or forgive yourself that you were scared up to this point, or forgive yourself that you screwed up the relationship. It was you. We want our kids to forgive themselves. We want them to forgive others. We want them to work on being grateful and having gratitude. And simultaneously, we wake up sometimes and our guts are spinning while we're helping someone else. Is it true? Let me know in the chat if anything I'm saying here today is resonating, right? So if that's the case, why are we waiting to fix this in the next generation? You got a lot of years left on this earth. Let's fix it with us. Remember, like, just think this. This is what I try to do all the time, is if I stay this way, my kids are going to be that way. I literally punish myself that way. Because if I stay this way, they're going to be this way. There's nothing I can do to change it, right? Another thing I wrote down is like, who are we when no one's watching? Like, we think we could put this facade on in front of our children, right? It could be children, it could be spouse, it could be partner, it could be friends, but we get to put this face on in front of other people, right? But then who are we when no one's around? Because I still believe our kids become who we are when no one's around. I think kids are the biggest, like, lie detector, bullshit detector, excuse my language. Like, they just feel who you are and they become it. Okay? Who in here has ever had something that you do that you're like, oh, this is mine, or it's adult, or it's kind of quirky. I never want my kids to see this one thing I've done. And then if you've had kids, they're a certain age and they do that exact thing that you think you protected them from their whole entire life. Where did that come from? I didn't teach you that. It's like, it's intuitive. So who are we when no one's watching is even important? Right? And that leads to our values, doesn't it? Right? What we do when people aren't watching is just. That's our character. We could say our character is one thing. We can pretend our values are one thing. When no one's watching. The things you do. That's who you are. But you know what the most congruent thing in the history of the world is? Is being the same human when no one's watching and when everyone's watching. That's one of the things I strive for more than anything. And I have to tell you, like, even in my relationship, I have to tell you, in the past relationship, I wasn't happy. And my wife and I were. My ex and I were. Had different relationships. And I have to tell you, I traveled a lot alone and I'd prefer to do things alone and I'd make trips up so we could have time apart and all that stuff. It really wasn't congruent. Deep down, I wanted to be in love. I wanted to be connected to someone. I wanted to. I wanted someone to share this journey with me, but I kind of pretended I didn't. My God, it's the most amazing. I don't want to go anywhere without my wife. Like, nowhere. Like, she's my everything, right? I wasn't congruent back then, and it felt kind of crappy. And I love that feeling. But what if. What if your children or your hypothetical children grew up and felt like imposters? What if they felt they weren't good enough? What if they let self doubt push them into a job they hate, but they thought, well, my mom took this job and she stuck with it. She stuck with it for 42 years and she put us through college and she took care of us. If my mom could do that, then you know what? I'm not that happy with this, but I kind of feel like an imposter, so I'm just gonna stick with it. When I say that, does that give anybody else, like, the hair stand up in their arms of, like, now? Screw that. If my daughter came to me and said, hey, Dad, I love you. Good to see you this weekend. How's it going, babe? Oh, you know, I got that job. And why did. I heard you wanted to have your own art company and be a designer and design companies and all that stuff. Yeah, dad, but you know, I didn't get the best grades in school and. And you know, I don't want people think I'm just living off your coattails, so it's okay. I took that job. You know, it's a good job, great benefits. If I saw her with that kind of expression on her face, I would die. I would die. Like, are you freaking kidding me? Life's too short. It goes by in a Second, like you don't realize it now, but how fast is time going right now? Right? Like we don't have time for that. And if we feel like the imposters and if we allow that to dominate our space, that's what we're giving out to the world. We're letting people know it's okay to let self doubt, to let last past accomplishments create this imposter syndrome. To say you're not good enough. And even if you think it's not a part of you, in so many cases it is. Because if you're not moving forward as fast as you think, there's still one area of your life you think you need to get better at, you may never get better at it. And that's okay. What if you're absolutely perfect for where you are? I still can't read good. I'll never be able to read good ever. I will never be able to spell good ever. I will never not want to throw up when I see an Excel spreadsheet with more than three lines on it. I will never like having meetings with too many people on the phone. All like, just like anything. Like there's so many things I will never be good at. But I got really good at a few things. Those were enough to create really incredible success in my life. I got really good at a few things. So, you know, if you go through any of my courses, you know, I always talk about stop working on your weaknesses. It only robs your strength and your confidence. Just go deep on what you're already good at. What's up? What's up? Hey, don't forget to look at the action steps we've posted below. They are the perfect way to take your success abundance in this cross crazy world to a whole another level.