How Successful People Think

Underdogs actually don't have to give a shit what other people think because most of the time you have nothing to lose. Welcome to the Dean Graziosi Show. I'm so excited you're here because this is a really special video. In fact, it's a three part series we're calling the Fireside Chat where I sat down with three of my team members, my high level team members, and talked about them being underdogs, their disadvantages, how they didn't have the support, the money, the income, the education, but how did they rise to the top of their career because they used their disadvantages as their superpower. And this is to celebrate this week, my brand new book is launched, the Underdog Advantage. My first book in three years. I'm so excited. And because of that, we sat down and did this Fireside Chat and I think it's absolutely something you need to see if you're ready to go to another level of life. You want more. You want to stair step your career all the way to the top. You want to start that, turn that idea into a business. You want to scale the business you already have, but maybe you don't have the money, the resources, the support. Then you're going to want to watch every second of this three part series and at the end you'll learn how you can get a copy of my brand new book, the Underdog Advantage. The hardcover, for free. Yes, for free.

How do you trust your heart and the decisions that you make knowing that there's so many negative people out there waiting for you to fail?

That's a really great question. So I believe the majority of people in the world you watching, you crave more. We all want another level. We all. When I was a kid, there was no YouTube or Instagram or Facebook. The only thing I watched was Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous with Robin Leach. I think Robin Leach is a British guy, right? And he'd go into these fancy houses. I'm like, oh my God. People live like that. Now. It's all over. You just go on your Instagram and there's jets and houses and all that stuff. So the problem is when you see it and you crave it, I think we have this subconscious, this inner voice that's like, that's for other people. If you don't speak the language, you're from a different country. You come from a tiny little town in the Midwest and you don't have money and your friends do, but you don't. You have parents with substance abuse and you Live in a trailer park. You're like, that looks great, but I don't. So you already have that subconscious, that inner self doubt telling you you can't. And then what I think is, so many people, they want it, but they don't feel they're gonna go after it, or they don't have the desire to go after it, or they're scared to go after it. So it's easier for them to say shobana. You know, you're here, your family's here. You don't want to. Gonna go to Australia all by yourself. You don't speak the language or. Jeremy, you got a great thing here. This is a great little town. You know, take that job down the street, work with Steve Thorne. You'll be okay. You say four or, you know, go in the army, Josh, you know, know that's safe. You could do in the army. And maybe you could be a career, you know, serviceman. Yeah, right. And I think. I don't think people are doing that because they want to hurt you. I think it's their own insecurities coming out. And as an underdog, here's what I know. I believe most people hear enough of that, and it's cumulative. And maybe you could resonate with this at home. Like, you go, I'm doing more. I'm not doing what my family did. I got another level in me. And then you got a guidance counselor or a teacher saying, slow down, buddy. Stop being a dreamer. You got this. I had those teachers, right? And then when I wasn't going to college, for me, I was like, oh, no, college, okay, maybe you can get it. So what happens is, I believe you have friends and family who love you that think they're protecting you. And a lot of them say, hey, cool out in the dreams. Let's get more realistic here. And you know, no, I could still do it, but a little bit sticks. And then you get a guidance counselor. Say something, and a little bit sticks. Then you get a. Then you get a teacher say something, and then a friend says something. And then all of a sudden you watch the. And they say, oh, my God, the economy's turning. Or maybe you don't like the president. Maybe you're liberal and it's conservative. Maybe you're conservative and it's liberal. And all these little things keep adding up and what I believe. And maybe again at home, you could think about this. There's just one day that adds up enough, and you go, I should be happy where I'm at. I'm good. Like you Know, I have a good life and I have a good family. I have a nice house. And I think, like, to shock everybody right now, and I want to get back to it, and don't let me get off track here. And if either of you have any thoughts on this, do it. But I. I believe at the end of our lives, like, when we meet our maker, could you imagine sitting with your maker and you sit down with him or her, and you're like, you know, I had a good life. You know, I was gonna go after that. But my family, they were probably right. I was a little bit of a dreamer. You know, I didn't speak the language great. Or I did live in a trailer park, or I did come from a small town. So I had a good life. You know, I went after. Could you imagine your maker just being like, oh, my God, another one? Like, another one? I made you human. I put you on Earth. I gave you limitless boundaries. I gave you a brain. There was nothing that could stop you. The only thing that stopped you was you. And you let people tell you you couldn't. And what I believe is most people take it and it builds up, and then all of a sudden they think, I can't. But here's the one thing common with underdogs, with the three of you. Why you're sitting here, why you helped run my company, why you're so damn successful, why the most successful people that I geeked out on while I was doing research for the book, looking back at my own life, and it's one of the chapters, underdogs. Whether there's a certain, like, epiphany where it shifts or it's subtle, or you're born that way. Underdogs take when people tell you you can't, and becomes the power of you can't. Right now, if someone says to you, josh, oh, you're gonna go work for Dean and run his company, you know what? You need more experience for that, Josh. I don't think you can do it. How does that make you feel? Does it make you feel like you can't or you, like, don't you dare tell me what I can't do.

Yeah, I stand up an inch taller and I say, I'm gonna show you. I'm showing you, because it becomes the.

Power of you can't. I mean, Shabana, someone says, you're a brown woman, you're not gonna come to the States and rock? Like, does that make you feel like, I wanna play small or do you wanna show the world?

I just Wanna prove it to them, right?

Yeah. Now, I know you sitting here. I know your success path. Same with you, Jeremy. I've known you for so many years. But unfortunately, the reason I wanna sit here and talk about. There's a lot of people home right now. That it's been so cumulative that it doesn't mean you give in, but it's just enough to be like go into a hypnotic rhythm of life. Like, I want it, you know, maybe it's good enough. And this is of the conversation disturbs you at home. And start thinking about when people tell you you can't remember, they don't make statues of critics. Like when they tell you you can't. And that's the. I have a whole chapter on how to. I took this word from Napoleon Hill, but transmutate that negativity into actual fuel. And I don't mean getting mad or resentful or being mean. But right now, I mean, I'm in a phase of my life through these years of doing it that I love when I'm told I can't because we need all the fuel in our arsenal. We can. Like, what do they say? A rocket going into space. 80% of the fuel to get a rocket into space is like just getting it 100ft off the ground. Right. And then it can soar. When it's in space, it barely uses any fuel. So for me, it's like, if we're going to shift people to start the company, scale the company, go to the next level, know your idea is worthy to not listen to your friends and family, to stop having people tell you you're a dreamer, like to ignore all them. We have to get disturbed sometimes. So we get the rocket off the ground. So if you could take that. You can't. And turn it into the power of you can. I think it's really powerful. What does that mean to you? Have you had people telling you you couldn't.

I mean, I honestly, I think that's the whole reason why I'm working for you right now is because I had. She's actually a dean follower, so she's probably watching. But Mrs. Krowski, she was my marketing teacher and I was doing this whole thing where you go to school half the day, you go to work. And I got the job with. With Steve. And she's like, you're gonna go work for an infomercial guy?

I'm like, yeah, yeah.

But they're doing real estate and they're teaching real estate and they're gonna change like all these. She's like, you can't do that. And I was like, why? She's like, infomercials are scams. And I was like, yeah, but I know this guy. Like, I know Steve. He was my neighbor. And I knew it wasn't a scam. And she wanted to. She was threatening me to kick me out of marketing class, which that was the only class I needed to, like, graduate high school. And that kind of gave me all my fuel because I was so fed up with.

Do you have her address? We should send her your W2. You made more this month than she made last year. Yeah, that's true.

Yeah. And it's funny, because she was one that gave me all the fuel. But I remember whenever I was like, because I started out in customer service and that fueled me so much is because I was thinking I wasn't going to graduate high school because of her. And that's when I started taking on all the projects. And I got, you know, managed that project for the launch for you. But that's what actually drove me the first couple years of working for customer service is because I wanted to prove her wrong. And about three years later, after I moved out here with you, she messaged me and was like, you know what? I was wrong. She apologized and she made mints. But it was like, you talk about that tipping point. It's like, that was my tipping point for sure, because I already had my work ethic.

This is the part that gets me, because I remember Mrs. Thompson, my seventh grade teacher, called me dumb non stop because I had dyslexia. It was hard to read. So she'd just be like, spell it out. You're so dumb. And I know. And I just. I don't know about you guys. I want to ask you this question. I had two voices inside of me. One said, screw her. You're gonna be fine. She doesn't know what she's talking about. You got this. We're gonna prove the world wrong. We're gonna be great. And then the other voice was, maybe she's right. I'm not that smart. And I don't think I'm going to college. Man, life's gonna be really tough. I hope I can get a job someday. Like, I don't know. I'd love to say I killed that voice. And the empowered dean had it. No, I wasn't in control. Both of them were. And I'm just blessed that the voice that said, screw them. I'm going to show them was just a little bit stronger than the voice that Said, I don't know if you can make it. You ever have experience like that? Oh, totally.

So I'll relate back to the same example, right. When my parents were trying to figure out how to send me to study abroad, Right. I was the first woman or first girl to go somewhere out of that community. And when my parents started to talk to, you know, the friends and family to say, hey, I'm going to sell my house to send her, you know, to study, they were like, are you an idiot? Like, you know, this is your whole life's worth of savings, and you're just going to spend it on your child, like, you know, on a girl on top of that.

Right.

And I was really lucky that my parents didn't actually listen to them. Right. And then you obviously still hear your family and your friends and your community talking about it. And that basically drove me to say, hey, you know, I'm just going to prove it to all of them. I just use it as the fuel to say, I'll go to Australia, study, make it work, build a really good career out of it, and come back and show it to them. But on the other hand, as you said, there was another voice that was telling me what happens if, you know, if you fail, it doesn't work out. If I fail, my parents have already lost the house, so what's going to happen? Yeah, but again, as you said, that other voice took over and I just made it.

Yeah, and the cool part is, as long those voices are always going to be there, you just need one a little bit stronger than the other.

Exactly.

If we're talking about the mindset of an underdog. Right. Like, again, when I see people pitching just the tactics, I believe that if you gave most people a business on how to sell $20 bills for 10 bucks, they'd mess it up. They'd find a way to sabotage it. Not on purpose, just my family thinks it's a scam or it won't work where I live. Or maybe people don't like $20 bills in my neighborhood. Right. We find a way. So tools and tactics are needed. You need that skill. But if you don't go upstream and anchor in the right habits. That's why I wrote Millionaire Success Habits. Nothing works. You watch people, they'll dabble their whole life. And then I believe going up one more level is to turn what everybody feels is their disadvantage into their. Into their fuel, into their power. And that's why I love this book. It's because I think it's literally the foundation for all success. That's why I love it so much. But let me ask you this. So many people are afraid of what other people think. Like, you had people in your town, right? I'm sure that freaked you out, right? Being a woman, especially in that culture, and your parents getting rid of their house to send you to hopefully go to school and get a job. That's crazy. But your parents had something that. It's. Chapter number one is underdogs don't have to care what other people think. You see, I see that even with your parents, they intuitively had that. They didn't care what their friends say. I'm sure your dad, his brother, relatives, friends were like, are you nuts? Right? The same with your friends. I remember when you were leaving, you went to Christmas, holiday, and you called me, said, I think I don't know if I could work for you, Dean. You left me this big, long email, and I'm like, because you were worried about what they thought, but were they really qualified to tell you what you should be doing?

No.

Right. And anybody in your life, same way, did you. Did you worry at one time what other people thought?

Honestly, every day until I came to work with you, every single day, it was always, what are people gonna think? And I got out of the trailer park. Am I ever gonna go back? I still, to this day, I pass a trailer park and I get anxiety. And you actually said it earlier when you said, they don't make statues out of critics. Every time I don't want to wake up in the morning to go to the gym. Every time I don't want to finish that last chapter. Every time I don't want to answer one last email before bed, I think about that. And when you look at it for me, when I look at an old statue, all I can think about is, that guy is immortalized in this bronze.

You know how many people told him that guy was crazy?

And if you could go back in time and pull those people and say, hey, tell me about Galileo. Oh, that guy was an idiot.

Exactly.

Yeah, he's crazy. Tell me about da Vinci. The guy he stood up in his apartment all day long.

He's going to sail off the earth.

Yeah, all day long. But what do we talk about those people now? Oh, da Vinci was a genius. Columbus was a traveler.

So what if. I know this sounds crazy, you at home, think about it. There's a whole chapter. And underdogs actually don't have to give a shit what other people think. Because most of the time you have nothing to lose. Right. So think about that. If you're born with privilege, right, or you're running a big monster company, when you make a decision, you have so much to lose. That a lot of times, that's why big companies go bankrupt after they get there. Because a visionary with nothing to lose pushed all the chips in the Steve Jobs, the Bill Gates. They just push it in like, I have nothing to lose, I'm going for it. And then a generation or two later, when everybody's feeling a privilege, they lose that, that underdog advantage and they start playing small, they start playing conservative. And you watch these big companies go down, it's cause they lost the underdog edge. So what if today was the day you realize as an underdog, you don't have to care what other people think. In fact, most of the time, what people are telling you is the wrong advice. Right. And as subtle as it sounds, that's what I love about the Way I laid. What I love about this book. Not just because I wrote it, because I just love. I love to go through the process of reminding myself that if I would have listened to what other people had to say, if I would have cared what they thought just a little bit more. Because I'm not gonna say I didn't care at all, but I didn't care enough to listen to them. If I would have cared a little bit more, I'd be living the life that they're living. So give me an example of someone in your life that told you you were crazy and then explained their life.

Yeah, Think of somebody. Sadly enough, it was my aunt. When I told her, when I got out of the Navy, when I told her I was gonna go to college, she just. She was like, nobody's ever gone to college in our family. And then I started school, and then when I dropped out of college, she said, well, I told you. I told you. And it just motivated me to just educate myself. And so I started reading my reading books, trying to finish a book a week since I was 26 years old. And it really opened up my life and opened up my eyes to what the world was.

I mean, you think about it, it's our broke friend telling us how to run our job or our career or start the business. It's our single friend telling us how to make our relationship better or to end our relationship. So if you could. If I could wave a magic wand and make it so you at home never cared about what other people thought. Let me just ask you at home right now, if I could wave a magic Wand and you never had to worry about what other people thought ever again. What would you be doing different tomorrow than you're currently doing? Because as simple as that sounds, I've been blessed to meet so many people on stage and around the world and shake people's hands. And a lot of time when I dig into why they're not doing it, one of the reasons is because they're worried about someone in their family, a spouse, even their husband, their wife, their parents, what they're going to think. And they're playing small, but it's like it's bottled up inside of them. It's causing them to either have anxiety or stress or worry because they know it's like they're a horse at the beginning of the race and they're in there. You know, the horse gets all excited and it's dying to go. But they're not opening Gate of Life because they're worried about what mom and dad think or what your aunt thinks. You guys broke free from that. Amazing. Congratulations. That's why we're sitting here. It's why we work on the same team together. But 95% of the people watching right now, that little thing is holding you back. So that's why I wrote a whole chapter on how to shift that. Not hate those people, not look down on them, but not let it affect you. Because those little things, again, are cumulative, stopping you from the next level. Listen, we've been talking about turning your disadvantages into your advantages because most of us are underdogs. And it's not the big things, it's the subtle little shifts when you go upstream and you make these shifts. That's how massive success is created. So we're going to get to another section, but right now, before we're done, I want to give you the opportunity to get my book the underdog advantage. This week we're doing an insane special because it's coming out to the world. My last book, Millionaire success habits, passed 700,000 copies. It was one of the best selling books of the last couple years. I believe this one will blow past a million copies faster than that because it's so powerful. It's going to show you no matter where you are in life, if you feel privileged right now, I'm going to teach you how to get that underdog advantage back, how to feel and have an underdog mindset so the competition can't touch you. If you feel the cards are stacked against you, I'm going to show you how to turn that into your superpower. I obsessed over this book. I spent almost two years on it. And here's the cool part. You can go to Amazon right now and grab it for 19.95 and that's awesome. Or go to deansbook.com that's dean deansbook.com and we threw in some amazing bonuses to get you to take action now. So go to deansbook.com that's deansbook.com get insane instant bonuses and even a special webcast with me where I'm going to show you what I believe is the number one way in today's shifting economy, today's shifting culture, to make impact and profits even as the economy takes a diplomat. If you're ready for another level of life, if you're sick of feeling like an underdog, you want to turn that into the wind behind your sail, grab this book, the Underdog Advantage, and see why everyone's going nuts over it. What's up? What's up? Hey, before you go, you need to watch these next few videos. They're absolute game changers. Hurry up and click right over here and watch them and I'll see you there. Sam.