How To SET GOALS & Actually ACHIEVE THEM! | Dean Graziosi

Picture a month that invokes an emotion that will create a memory and momentum to carry you stronger into 2021. Would you guys like to know what Tony Robbins personally does every year at this time to anchor in a good year? No. All right, we'll skip that one. No, I'm kidding. I'm not going to skip that. Okay, so here is what we. This is what we're going to do. I'm going to show you this right here. Okay? So Tony does this and takes his phone, which we never had access to. And I'd encourage you because I did this the other night. I even made a slideshow out of it. Showed my family, my whole family absolutely loved it. My wife cried. Now, what am I talking about? We must carry across, like, let's. Let's take 2020 and 2021 and make it like there's a line between the two. Let's get that definitive line right. And we must. I love all the yeses. We must. We must carry what serves us across the line to 2021. And we must let what doesn't serve us die in 2020 make sense. I know that because you could just wake up New Year's Day and be in the same. Ah, shit. This didn't work in 2020. This person let me down. My career, my industry, we have the choice. There's no rules in this. We make the rules. So if something's not serving you in 2020, then let that crap live in 2020. And we only want to carry across the finish line the things that light us up, that will create momentum, that will serve us. So Tony's little hack, which I love, he shared it with me, and it was killer, is go through your phone. You have so many pictures, and each month, 12 pictures. I'll be honest, I picked a little more. I picked more like two a month, and then I made a little slideshow out of it. But pick a picture a month that invokes an emotion that will create a memory and. And momentum to carry you stronger into 2021. I want to give you an example. So, Mike, can you pull up that first picture? I just sent these to Mike. So I went through. This is one of my pictures. That's my amazing wife Lisa, at nine months pregnant. That was like a week before we had a baby. And, wow, my hair's a little poofy there. But, you know, I even posted on Instagram. I am a lucky man. Now, I chose this picture for a reason. Okay, let me tell you why you take that down, Mike. I'M gonna go through. I'm gonna tell you a little personal background. That was Tony Robbins birthday party, and he didn't want a big, fancy party about him. He made it about a charity that is near and dear to his heart called Operation Underground Railroad. Helping people, children mostly in slavery in today's world. Crazy, I know. Shocking. His whole birthday was dedicated to helping that. He didn't want it about him, but it was his 60th birthday. His wife, Sage, did an amazing job of putting this party together. And we went. Why did I choose this? That picture is special for a lot of reasons. My wife is beautiful. She's nine months pregnant. Before my boy Luca was born, we had an incredible night. I got to celebrate my dear friend who I love, Tony Robbins. And that's a guy who changed my life 25 years ago. And I just wished I could meet him. And now he's my dearest friend and my partner, all of those. And that night, I was so involved in what was going on with Operation Underground Railroad, and it hit my heart so much that I was able to stand up when they said, who wants to donate? People were donating 10,000, 20,000, 50,000. My wife and I stood up, and we donated a half a million dollars that night. We gave away $500,000 in a check that night to Operation Underground railroad. And every $2,000 saves a child. And after that night, my wife and I, we left, and we went into that. We went to our hotel room, which is right next to where Tony's thing is, where we stayed because it was late, and we just felt so full. Our hearts were filled. We prayed. That's our gig. You know, we prayed for those that are struggling, and we can't even imagine, but we were able to do that. So that picture. Look at the hair standing up on my arms right now. That picture says so many things. Tony Robbins is my dear friend. Once, I just wanted to thank him. My wife, I love her to death. I'm in this amazing relationship. My baby Luca's in there. And that night, we helped children that were enslaved because I worked hard. And I've been busting my ass since I was 15 years old, cutting firewood and driving tow trucks and then fixing cars and then working on houses late at night, like, all of those things. But if I could be at that moment and be able to help people, it really pulls me forward. So that became one of my pictures. Now I don't want this to be just about me. Oh, look how great Dean is. You donated all that money no, it took me a long time to get here. This is just where I'm at, guys. I failed miserably. I've let people down. I've made mistakes. I went broke. It's just where I'm at now because of that accumulation of all that wisdom allowed me to get here. But that picture means a lot. I'm carrying those emotions over into 2021, and I'm gonna work my ass off to donate even more money, right? Like next year. I want to stand up and do more than that, but it's gonna take a lot of work because, you know, donating half a million bucks. And that wasn't the only thing. We passed 7 million meals with Feeding America. We built a church. I built a school in Africa in 2020, right? So I need to make more money. So I'm gonna impact more lives. I'm gonna write more books. I'm gonna serve with my heart wholly so I can do more for the world. I. And that's a phase. It doesn't mean you're there yet. The first person you should take care of is you. You should put your oxygen mask on. Then you should put the oxygen mask of your family and friends, and then you can go out and help change the world, right? Okay, let's go to this next picture. This next picture. That is my son Brody, my daughter Bree, and my sister in law, Valerie, who helps us out big time with our baby. She's so cool. And she helps her sister out, my wife. Why'd I pull that picture? Because that was us this summer up in Sedona. And I remember that, like, spending this quality time with my kids and being with my family. I was standing with my wife and our little boy, Luca, he was born. By then I realized, isn't that what it's all about? Contribution, love? And I'm gonna work hard, I'm gonna work really hard to have that freedom to. To donate that money again or more next year to take my kids up. When it's 100 degrees here, 105 here, we can go up to Sedona and go jump in a stream and play like little kids. And I have a real. I could cry right now. I have a real connection with my children. It's not this, oh, good kids. I'm connected to my children. Even though my daughter's 14 and my son's 12. Harder years, but I'm still connected. Can't wait to go spend time with them tonight. I want to look at that picture and remember those. Remember that memory. Listen, could I go in my phone and pull up pictures when I was having a really stressed day, or when a friend let me down, or when things went sideways, or I lost a million dollars this year on something really stupid. It's a long story. I picked the pictures of the days where I missed my kids because I get half custody and I get them 50% of the time. That's why today is so important to me, because tonight I'm going. It's the first time I've seen them in five days. I can't wait to be with my children. Right. Can I pick a day of a picture of me kind of sitting when I can remember that I missed my kids? I could, but I don't want to. I want to picture the day where we totally immersed ourselves and played in that stream and connected and had great conversation. I want to have more of that in 2021. Right. So that's that. This next picture. Let's go to the next one. Again, I'm sorry. I'm doing this about me. I hope you know I'm using this example for you. This is where I'm sitting right now. We have a new set and screens all coming, but I'm sitting here right now. And why did I take that picture? Because I remember that we shifted the world. You could take that down, Mike. The world shifted in 2020, and it was hard for all of us. We have a big old brand new office here. This office that I built has 100 spots, and this was almost filled. And the world shifted and we had a shift. And people need to be served, no matter what. We used to do events in the office and live events, and we weren't set up for this virtual world yet. And all of a sudden things shifted, but people still needed us. And we had a shift big time. And I took that picture because it shows, like right now where we had countries all over the world, probably 100 countries right in here. And we're connected. I feel like I'm in your living rooms. We're talking right now. We're communicating. This is amazing that we have social distancing, but this picture, pull it back up, Mike reminds me, in our new screen, I'll be able to see hundreds and hundreds of you. Even though we rotate that so I can see so many people. You could pull that down. But what it reminds me of, we might have social distancing, but we are virtually connected. And I feel more connected to you guys now than ever before. Whether you see me on ASF Live, whether you see me in Mastermind in Motor Millions in kbb. Motor Millions is my first course two decades ago. Wherever you see me, I know now, like, I want that picture. Like, I need to do better and better and better to be emotionally and virtually connected to you so you don't. I don't want to just be a talking head. Why do you think I'm showing you my personal pictures? I don't want to like. So today we're going to learn the seven steps to strength, right? It's like, I want you to know me and know how I got here so you can utilize it for you. This isn't about Dean's great. I wish I could be him. Screw that. Take what I teach you. Learn from my mistakes and make it to be about you. That's what my goal is. And that picture shows I need to work harder to impact more lives. That's why I prepare for things like this. I obsessed over this last night. What are the best things I can do? I'm obsessing over what I'm teaching January 5th and 6th. Obsessing, right? Because the world needs it. And that's the gift God gave me. You have your gift and I hope if you're in Mastermind or you're in kbb, you know that you have a gift that the world needs, right? We gotta get better at it. So that's what that picture does for me. Okay, let's go to the next one. I'll go quicker on these. This is my wife, Lisa. This was on our anniversary, our wedding anniversary. My nose a little scrunched, kissing my beautiful wife. But that picture means the world to me because she's my best friend. I love her to death. And that anniversary, you know, anniversary was a great time to remind of our nuptials and being married. But really, it's an everyday thing, right? And to me, what I carry across this, and I want to share this with you is the little things that I learned even more every year. I learned more about my wife. The things that I know light her up, that give us that relationship that I know, that I get out of bed at five. She doesn't get out of bed till about seven, right? And what I realized for a while, I was sneaking out of bed because I don't want to wake her up. She's up a lot with our baby. We have a nine month old. So I'd creep out of bed and let my beautiful wife sleep. And she told me about three months later, she told me about three months later, she's like, babe, I Don't care if you wake me up. Could you kiss me when you leave? Because I just feel disconnected. Like the little thing. I know that's a tiny little thing, but it's something I learned. And I look at that picture, I was like my wife. All she wants me to do is give her a peck on the cheek at 5am and it lights up her day. If I'm not noticing that I'm carrying that with me, I'm gonna let the rest burn. Where maybe I was too busy and I didn't communicate with her for a whole day like I should have. I didn't ask her how she was doing. I didn't ask her about her day. I was so consumed with my crazy days, I forgot about her. Like, I'm leaving that shit in 2020 and I'm not doing it anymore, right? So that's what those pictures do. Pull up that next one. This is my wife, obviously, and my little boy, Luca. I could scroll in and kiss that little boy. I'm sharing this picture because this was a flight. I was blessed to be on this amazing plane. It's not mine, but I was on this incredible private plane and went down to Florida. This is right before the world summit that we did that just we had 10,000. So many of you were there, it was off the charts insane. And that reminds me of how we shifted and my hard work. We were able to put everybody in this amazing studio that Tony and I built and have 10,000 of you from 100 plus countries just lighting it up. And let me just get to this last one and then one more just because I want to show off my boy. Can you pull up that last picture, Mike? And that's my boy, Luka. That was just a couple days ago. Look at that little guy. And that reminds me, lastly, that reminds me that I'm a dad again. I have a 14 and a 12. I'm 52 years old. And I'm not saying poor me or I'm old, but I have a baby, my wife wants more. And it reminds me that I have a shot to do it great again. To not miss out, to not how fast it goes. My daughter's 14. She was two years old two minutes ago. That it reminds me that I don't want to miss out. It also reminds me that if I want to be a thriving young type dad for that little boy, I got to stay in great shape. I got to make better decisions with my food. I got to make sure I make great decisions with my health and my exercise. With my stress and people I bring in, like, I got to do the right thing, because that little boy deserves the best version of me. Okay, that was more than I've ever shared about myself ever. But the only reason I did that is because I want to give you an example of what I brought and what I looked at and what I'm bringing forward in 2021. I want those memories. I can find lots of crappy memories in 2020. I want to tell you, 2020 was one of the toughest years for me in a lot of ways. A lot of things went sideways. I'll share that another time. But I'm leaving them in 2020. I'm leaving them there just making that decision. I'm bringing those memories with me. I'd encourage you. Let's take Tony Robbins, little hack there that he does. And I encourage all of you to do it before the new year. It'll be different than any of your friends are doing. I promise you that. And if your resolutions didn't work last time, how will you help them work this time? Okay, that's number one of seven. I got seven more to go. You guys liking this? Give me a hell yes if you're going to do this exercise. Okay. All right. We're going to go through the other six. We're going to go through the other six really quick and get ready for July 5th and 6th. Okay. Number two. Number two. What was number one? Is the picture exercise? Number two is I would love for you to literally write down. Now, this might seem counterintuitive from what I just said, but I would love for you to take the time today when time allows and write down what. What went sideways in 2020. What didn't work, what did you fail at, what was hard, what didn't work, what was hard, what scared you? What were you fearful of? I see all the yeses. I love it. What went sideways in 2020? Because if you think. We all know this, not when you're going through it, but we all know that the things that we fear the most or the things that are the worst it could possibly be, we all know that that is actually the. You know, I use this term a lot, the success tax we must pay to become another version of ourselves. Right. I'm going to share this, and I have before, but I'll share it now and again. It's not about me. I hope you are getting. I want this to be about you, but I'm giving you examples to show you, hopefully be vulnerable. And I'm in The best place I've ever been. I'm more success than I ever imagined possible. But it took all the crap to be in that relationship, to be that dad. To have the success I have, to have the partners I have, it took the crap, right? So let's not throw away all of the stuff that went sideways because there's gold in all of it. If we're willing to unwrap it and look at it through a different lens and say, what did I learn from this? What did I learn from this? Right. I'm going to use a really. No more trampoline. Oh my God, Karen. I don't know if I'm sorry. Squirrel. Both my kids broke their ankle on my trampoline. How crazy is that? My daughter a year ago, my son three months ago. So I'm not going to look anymore and get distracted. But what can we learn in 2020 that brings us forward again? I'm going to be personal here. When I went through my divorce, my ex and I, my children's mom knew that our relationship was over many years before that. We lived in different places in the house, but we were co parenting and we figured out how to do it. When we finally decided that we were going to end things, it really put me in a tough spot because of my children, because I was a child of divorce. I know how ugly it was and I didn't want my kids to experience that. I was willing to sacrifice not being in love and having just a friendship and, and co parent like I thought that. And then there was a time that neither one of us could do that anymore. And that moment that we said it's over and I have to look at my kids and tell them this, I went into crazy, like anxiety, fear, like I can handle anything in business but my children. This was brutal for me and I was melting down a little bit. This is years and years ago, but I was melting down. It's being honest. I'd love to say no. I handled it perfectly. No, I didn't. But. But I did the same things here. I got in groups, I got a coach, I went to a therapist, I read books, I interviewed people who had gone through it and I worked on me and I became better friends with my ex. As we exited, we put the kids first. We made a child centered divorce. But here's the reason I'm sharing. This is during that worst pain of my life, worrying about my children. The worst pain ever. Nothing is compared to that in my entire life, I'll be honest with you. Anxiety up The. I mean, I literally, three days a week, I had to have a glass of wine at night, literally. And this is a person who worked on his personal development his whole life, who could pick up the phone and talk to Tony Robbins and Dr. Everybody. I was going to say Dr. Amen, who was so beneficial and helped me so much. But as I was going through it, I became a better version of me on the other side, right? I went back through that pain. But during the pain, I navigated new territory. I had empathy on a whole other level with people that went through an. I had compassion for people who went through divorces. I had compassion for my parents that some of the things they did. I focused on my children. I couldn't have quality time or quantity of time. It was reduced in half. It had to be quantity. I had to go deeper. And all of a sudden, this pain that I could have said, this ugly, this thing, it was also this blessing. I came out on the other side. I unpackaged the shit all around the divorce. And I went through and go, I could be a better human. If I'm going to attract the love of my life, I need to step up. I can't just go look for a woman to fix me. I need to be a better version of me. Here's some of the things I messed up on to get to that point. And I worked on me to become better. I got a love coach. I got someone to help me unblock some things that happened when I was a child. I became a better version of me. I looked at my kids and said, no, this does not get in the way of being my children. When they're with me, it's going to be deep. And all of these gifts came out of the worst experience of my entire life. That's one example. Have I had other bad experiences? No, that was the only one. Hell, no. I go through shit all the time. We all do. So that's why I want you to look at this past year and say, what was the crap? What went sideways? And where is the gift in the crap if you just move it out of the way? Because here's what I want you to do. If we go through what failed is what is the lesson that we can learn from the fear we had, the way we stopped, the way we didn't show up, the thing that went sideways? There's always a lesson. And if you just take it, like, think about. A pile of poop and know that this little bit of gold is in the poop now, I don't Want your hands dirty, but you got to put some gloves on. Move it out of the way. Find the gold. I found the gold in the worst experience of my life. I'm a better human being because of it. And that has happened in my business more than ever. I failed miserably in businesses. It hurt. I wanted to give up. I said, screw that. I'll go to work for somebody else. But then I stopped and go, no, no. That was a lesson. That was me paying my success tax. God needed me to go through that. The universe, whatever you believe in, what can I learn from that? And when I got to analyze it and I pulled out the gold, I'm using this little cap as gold out of the poop. I could take this with me into 2021 and leave the rest in 2020 and let it die. So think about that. What is the pile of poop? I was doing it too low. You couldn't see what I was doing. What is the pile of crap you went through? The failure, the loss, the fear part, It. Find the gold. I'm using this as gold. Keep the gold. Learn from it. And throw that crap away. What's up? What's up? Hey, before you go, you need to watch these next few videos. They're absolute game changers. Hurry up and click right over here and watch them, and I'll see you there. It.