Multi-Millionaire Explains His SIMPLE STEPS To Self-Made SUCCESS | Dean Graziosi

The difference between needing something and wanting something could be the absolute differentiator between success and failure.

Collect the right people and be in a room where everybody's getting smarter. If you're the smartest person in the room, if you're the most inspirational person.

In the room, we get our ass kicked in life.

That's okay.

The people who can handle that, the ones that can handle the problems, the ones that can learn from it, are the ones that go to the next level. Are you someone that gets over something right away, or are you someone that holds on to it? I was thinking about something important today that I wanted to share with you guys. How long do you hold on to a failure? How long does it kick your ass? For lack of a better word?

How long do you stare at what.

Could have went right instead of what did go wrong? How long do you find someone or something to blame? You know, I'm gonna switch this up a little bit. Let me ask you another question. Let's get back to how long do you hold onto a failure? How long do you hold a grudge when something goes wrong in your life? When someone isn't fair to you, someone's unfaithful to you, someone lies to you? Things didn't go right. They didn't ask you to the movie. They didn't ask you to be a partner. They were just something that rubbed you wrong.

It was your perception of something that offended you and you were upset or.

You held a grudge or had a grudge. So let me just ask you something. How long does it take you to get over that? It's a really important question, because here's what I know. In all my obsessive study of successful people, happier people, yes, I say success. I mean money in a lot of cases.

But I also mean abundance and joy.

Would you take a million dollars, would you take 10 million right now to be miserable for the rest of your life? I doubt it. So that's why we talk about the millionaire success habits as the foundation for all success, right? So let me just ask you, how long do you. Do you hold on to a grudge? And let me just ask you, if you're someone who holds on for a long time, how does that serve you? How does that feel when you obsess about, why could this happen to me? That is the crappiest question in the world. Or, why would they do that to me? Or here's even a better one, I didn't deserve that.

In most cases, probably all of those are true.

But even though it's true. It doesn't serve you in any way possible. In fact, it does the opposite of serve you. Because it's not like God or whoever you believe in, the universe or your.

Creator, Whatever you believe in comes down.

And says, you didn't deserve that. I'm sorry it happened.

Who are we looking for that life?

We get our ass kicked in life.

That's okay.

The people who can handle that, the ones that can handle the problems, the ones that can learn from it, are the ones that go to the next level. So let me just ask you again. Are you someone that gets over something right away, or are you someone that holds on to it? Because if you hold on to it.

The only thing that can do is.

Delay the progress of your life. The only thing it can do is hurt you. The other person already committed the act. The other person is not going to be paid back by your anger, paid back by you living small, paid back by you dimming your light. So now I go back to the.

Original thing I said.

I asked about how long does it take for you to get over a failure? I believe that the two correlate. I believe how long it takes you to get over someone taking advantage of you, how long you hold a grudge.

Is probably about the same amount of.

Time it takes you when you try a business and it doesn't work out, when you try a partnership and the partner lets you down. When you go after a course and the course didn't work, and then when it doesn't work out, you find reasons why it didn't, it frustrates you, it annoys you. And then you go back to the life where you're at now. I wasn't trying to pigeonhole everybody who's listening. What I'm trying to do is make a point.

If this is just even a fraction.

Of you, these are the types of things. Doesn't matter how good you are.

There's a whole nother level.

You see, I've been obsessively working on letting go of grudges and letting go of failures faster and faster every year of my entire life. Yes, I want to fail faster than anyone. If I look back in my 20s, being broke, not having money, wanting another level of life, didn't go to college. I realized one of the things that I had that most people didn't is that I could let go of a failure really fast. In fact, even beyond that, I could.

Get so pumped up, so motivated, so.

Inspired about a project.

You ever been there, Been so excited.

About something, wanting to do it.

You're like, I'm going for this.

I don't care what anybody says.

And you go and you put all.

Your enthusiasm and you stay up nights.

And you go after it and then.

You try it and then it fails. They're the hardest ones to let down. It's like a relationship that you work so hard and you think the other person's on the same page as you and they're not. All of a sudden, you're let down massively. Same kind of feeling when it's a business or anything that you're working hard on or working hard for a swim meet and you swim all summer to lose the race, Right?

I think about that.

I look back at my 20s, and one thing I had, I wasn't smart enough to read a lot of books or go to read courses or go to events like I should have or learn from others as much as I should have. So I'm obsessed with it now. It's why I love training and sharing.

Delivering you anything I can. To give you a heads up is.

I failed fast. It doesn't matter how excited I was when I failed. I'd mope and grope and be so pissed off. But by 48 hours later, I was over it.

Back to what I was saying.

Think about in your life this week, listening to this podcast, I want you to really take the time to say, how long do I hold a grudge? How long, when something goes wrong, do I hold onto it? Because here's what I know. The quicker you could focus on how to fix it, the quicker you can learn from your failure, the quicker you can anchor those emotions, those feelings. That's when knowledge becomes wisdom. I truly believe with all of me that knowledge is something we can all acquire.

Information.

We can all get it. There's more information out now than ever before in history. So knowledge is easy to find in today's world. Information, easy to find. Wisdom.

Ha.

That's hard to come by. Because wisdom is when you take knowledge, take information, put it into play, get your ass kicked in some places, learn from your mistakes, learn from the pain and power through. So again, this is what I want you to think about. I don't care where you are. If you hold a grudge shorter than anybody else, go shorter. If you rebound from a failure quicker than anyone you know, rebound quicker. Successful people rebound fast. And while they're rebounding, they're actually learning from the horrible experience they had. Transform the experience. Think of failures in a way to.

Do an experience transformation.

I just made that up. Transform the experience from something you call a failure, something painful, into, wow, I got that one out of the way. I learned from it. I know what to do next. Someone does you wrong, it's sad. You probably didn't deserve it. But any energy you spend on why they did it or wanting to get back is really just your ego fucking with you, for lack of a better word. Sorry. I drop some f bombs once in a while, but when I'm feeling it, I share it. See how quick your life changes when you can rebound quicker, let go of grudges faster, and focus on a bigger, better version of you.

I can't tell you how many times in my career and being a businessman and people knowing my marketing skills, that people come up to me and say, I can't believe my business didn't work. I created something that everybody in the world, everybody in America, everybody in my local area needed. I'll talk to people who said, I went into the boardroom and I literally showed them how they need to give me the promotion, how they need to put me ahead of marketing, or they need to put me ahead of sales, or they need to make me the vice president. I've even talked to people in a relationship and said, I can't believe it. My girlfriend, my boyfriend, my husband. They need me or they need me to do these things. And I want to be brutally honest with you right now. People don't do things they need to do.

Think about it.

Do people need to stop eating so much sugar? Do people need to stop eating so much processed food?

This.

I could be talking to you right now.

Do people need to go to the gym more or exercise more? Do people need more green vegetables in their life? Do people need less fat in their life? Yes, lots of people need those things.

But guess what?

People will only do those things if they want to. This is a huge determining factor when it comes to success or failure with a business. Whether you want to start a business or you just want to know how to persuade in your own life or get the promotion or take a business that's floundering in your life and make it profitable. You really need to understand the difference between needing something and wanting something on the deepest level possible. Because I've met so many people who have fallen in love with their creations. And you should. If you're. If you're selling something to the world, if you're selling something online, you want to sell something in retail, sell it on tv, sell it in any rare area, you want to sell it on Amazon you need to love that product, love that service. But just because you love it doesn't mean people are going to want it. And again, I've watched people create an invention, come up with a new idea, take something that someone else has and make it 10,000 times better and want.

To push it out.

And the terminology they use is this fulfills a need. This is a massive need. But today, maybe for the first time ever, I want you to understand the difference between needing something and wanting something. Because even though someone may need it, it doesn't mean that they want to buy it. They want to have it. Right? So how do we decipher the difference? So one thing is to enter the contact conversations already going on in the minds of your future or potential clients, your prospects. The simple word is a prospect. It's someone that is out there that you hope is fishing for the bait that you have to offer. So how do you do that? Well, I just heard a great example. Two days ago, a guy was creating a program for, remember the Biggest Loser? Maybe it's still on tv.

I don't watch a lot of tv.

But this guy I do business with was formulating a deal with the Biggest Loser people because I guess they have Biggest Loser camps all over the country, five or six locations. And what a great service. These people, people that are extremely overweight.

Can barely walk up a flight of stairs.

They're coming there and they go to these camps to get educated on the difference between good and bad food. They get educated on how they can fit an exercise program in life.

And a lot of these people leave.

There with their lives transformed. Love it. So the guy I'm working with was doing business with them to create a new sales program process to get more people engaged. So he wanted to learn what people that were extremely overweight, what are their thoughts? How do you enter a conversation going on in their heads rather than thinking, oh, if you're that overweight, you must hate the way you look or just obvious stuff. And if you're that much of a weight, I'm not trying to be belittling or critical in any way, but if someone's going to help you, they have to understand what's going on. What are your thoughts? What are your fears, what doing you are? What are your goals? What are your desires? So anyway, he goes and spends a couple weeks at one of these camps with people that were extremely overweight. And he entered their lives, he entered their world. He learned their fears, he learned their worries. He didn't guess, he didn't Say they need to lose weight. No shit.

No.

I'm just being obvious now.

Of course they need to lose weight. They need to lose weight because they'll be healthier, they'll need to lose weight so they have more relation and better relationships or maybe more intimacy in their life. That's obvious. They need it, but they're not going to change unless you know what they want. So he spends a couple weeks with them and he was in complete shock of what he learned because he entered conversations in their head. He found their true worries, like things like flying was their biggest fear. The embarrassment of walking down the aisle in a Runway and then off asking for the extra seatbelt. I mean, that's. I wouldn't have thought of that. And I think of that. It hurts my heart to think that they feel that way. People looking down the aisle at them. Another thing is they feared grocery stores. They felt like if they went to a grocery store and they put one thing, one bag of potato chips in their bag, everybody in the whole store would be looking at them. So they shopped in the middle of the night. They hated the word fat. I'm just talking about this group he was with. Maybe if you're way overweight, then this isn't you. But I'm just telling you what he found out. He hated the word fat. Most of the girls just wanted to lose dress sizes, and that's the way they wanted to equate it. He never would have discovered that until he entered conversations going on in their minds. If you created the weight loss process or something to help these people, and you were just thinking, now they need to lose weight, they need to look better, and you went about it, you wouldn't touch their emotions. You wouldn't touch what they really want, what their goals are, what their desires. So now, when he crafted the fulfillment for this, when he crafted the sales process and sales script to get people engaged, you can't do any business without selling them first. Selling is not evil. Selling gets people engaged to go to another level of life. You get them emotionally invested in a bigger future and you give them a shortcut, so you still have to sell them. So when he found those triggers, he knew how to communicate. He knew how to sell. He knew how to offer the solutions for what they wanted, not what he felt they needed. So let me ask you, what do you want to excel at in your life? Do you want to get a promotion at work? If you do, don't think about why your boss or your company needs you. Think what they want what problems can you solve for them? What fires can you put out? What complexity can you reduce? What ROI can you bring in where there's more money coming in because that's what they want. All business people want less complexity and more return on their investment. Bring less complexity, put out fires, bring more money. You get what you want. Your business. If you have this great product that you know everybody needs, have you really asked? Do you really know? Have you entered the conversation of people? Have you entered and finished sentences that they're saying so you know exactly what they want so you can supply? You can tweak the product and then tweak your sales message? If you have a relationship that's not at the level you want, instead of thinking what your spouse or the person on the other side of the relationship.

Needs and you want to find out.

What they want, enter conversations, find out.

Their feelings, years, find out what they're.

Saying to their girlfriends or their buddies.

When you're not around.

That's the kind of status, the stats that you need to finish or to improve upon a relationship. Guys, I hope this podcast showed you the difference between needing and wanting the whole world. So many people go into business with fulfilling a need. In most of the cases, you don't win until you understand what they want and you supply it. In some cases, you sell them what they want, but you're fortunate enough to create such a great product or service that you're giving them what they need to improve the quality of their life or their purchases or their transformation that they need and you can provide.

If someone would have told me in my 20s, maybe even in my 30s, that being a part of a group or being a part of a mastermind, where everybody's getting smarter is the fastest way to your next level, I would have said, whatever. I don't even know what that is. I don't understand it. The only way I can learn is by getting out there and doing it through my own trial and error. And wasn't I a fool? Listen, you are here because you want another level of success. And if I wasn't completely transparent with you, if I didn't open your mind up to new ways to gain knowledge, wisdom, and capabilities, if I didn't share my own stories, my own evolution, that I'd be doing a massive disservice to.

You, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.

I did not read one book in my 20s. Not one. I had dyslexia in school. When I tried to read, I was so embarrassed. It kind of it pushed me away from reading. I thought reading was bad. And here's the thing, I made massive gains in my 20s. I went from completely broke, no money, credit card debt, no college education, to being a millionaire in my 20s document or else I wouldn't share it here. And I did that by my own trial and error. I did it by massive amounts of failure, massive amounts of doing it wrong, massive amounts of stress, insane amounts of time obsessing and worrying and thinking and losing sleep over. Yes, I powered my way through it. I had grit. But what I wasn't smart enough to.

Realize and what I want to share.

With you is I was a fool. Contrary to that, I have a 18 year old kid that works for me. His name is Ryan, that I mentor and I teach. And he's a part of Masterminds and he is gaining the collective wisdom of people who have already experienced what he wants to do. So if I was going to boil down what a mastermind is, A mastermind is different than a live event where someone is at the front of the room pitching to you or sharing with you or teaching you. I've been to countless live events, they're amazing, they're game changers. But a mastermind is a brainstorm. A mastermind is think of collective wisdom in a room. So let's say you wanted to learn how to write a book and sell it on social media. Now you can look at all the other ads, read books about it, go out, write your book and try to sell it.

Amazing.

Much better than just writing it and guessing it. If you model other people, wonderful. If you read a book on it, wonderful. How much better would that be? If you went to a live event and someone was up on stage and they gave a 60 minute presentation on how they took an idea in their head and then turned it into a book and then turned it into marketing and sold a lot. That's another level, right? Pages and pages of notes. But now let's talk about a mastermind. What if you were in a mastermind with 20 other people who have already written books that were successful on social media and you got to be in that collective wisdom, in that collective consciousness of success, meaning you get to learn from each of their. When I say collective, you could have one person say, wow, it took me about a year to write the book and somebody said, oh my God, I know, it used to take me a year to write a book. But here's what I do. I get my phone out and I just go through the voice memo and I Come up with chapter heads. And then when I'm in the mood, even when I'm in the car driving.

I just hit record.

And I record the whole chapter. And then I take it and I.

Forward it to Rev.

They're a transcription service that's really cheap, really inexpensive, and they have it back in like five hours. Then when that gets back, I just edit my own words and, oh, my God, I had a chapter done. So I did that 12 times. I had my 12 chapters and. And the book was done. And you're like, oh, my God, that.

Just saved me a year.

Okay, give me that information on how to write it. And then someone else goes, yeah, I did something similar when I got my book done. Took me about six months to get momentum to sell it on Facebook. And someone else goes, oh, whoa, whoa, wait a minute. When I got done, I thought the same thing. But what I did is I started making one minute hook videos on Instagram. And what I did is in those one minutes, I would deliver a massive amount of value. In the beginning, I'd say, hey, here's a secret that you need if you want to lose weight, go faster, make more money, be healthier, have a better relationship. Here's one secret. Hey, if you'd like more of those secrets, click the link on this page and get my book. And you go, wow, how many books did you sell on Instagram like that with those one minute power messages? 10,000. Oh, my God, can I have that idea? Yes. Now I'm exaggerating here, but do you see how masterminding, how brainstorming with the collective wisdom in the room, all of a sudden you get years and years and years of experience all by the people who have been there or done.

Or even failed at what you want.

Here's the greatest thing about being around people when they go, yeah, I'm going to write this book and I'm going to sell it for $25 on Facebook. Somebody says, I tried on Facebook for 25. For some reason you can't get momentum. I tried it every way to Sunday, got the best marketing people on the planet. But here's what I did learn. If you sell it for under 19 and then you have a customer funnel, you over, deliver so much on the book that people come back and buy more products from you. It's okay to lose money on the front because they'll love you because you.

Wrote such a good book.

They'll come back and buy more of your products and you'll still be more cash flow positive and you can impact the world. Get your book out to people instead of trying to ask so much on the front that might have taken him five years or her five years to figure out. You know, how quick you get it just like that. So why am I obsessing on this for you? Because I wish someone would have told me the power of masterminding, the power of brainstorming with like minded people. The other thing too is it's not only the collective wisdom, it's the collective inspiration, right? Because that's like being here, listening to this podcast. You feel more normal because you realize your goals, your desires at the next level. And if you haven't already, make sure you go to subscribetodeen.com that's subscribetodeen.com so you get a bunch of free and discounted bonuses because you subscribed, you took action, and you make sure you don't miss any of these podcasts. But back to what I'm saying is.

When you realize that being part of.

A group like this, being a part of a mastermind online, being a part of mastermind in person, or just organizing people that have the same desires of you that you have, or have gone through the same experience as you, or have gone through it already collectively in a room, there's no faster way to another level. So I would be doing you a disservice if I didn't encourage you to get into masterminds, to form a group, to brainstorm with other people and don't let the wrong people be a part of it. You don't want someone in that group who's a pessimist. You don't want someone who's never had the desire to go to the next level. You don't want someone who's not in your industry or in your field, collect the right people and be in a room where everybody's getting smarter. If you're the smartest person in the room, if you're the most inspirational person in the room, go find another room. One of the fastest ways to your next level is masterminding and brainstorming. I hope that I shared in a clear, concise way why it could be the most impactful thing for your life.

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What's up?

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