Real Estate Investing Weekly Wisdom #279 - What are you afraid of?

Hey, everybody. Dean Graziosi, welcome to the weekly wisdom. I'm still on an absolute high. I spent the weekend down in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. Went to my friend Tony Robbins event. Got to spend a day with him in between, too. And you can't help but have that energy rub off. It's so amazing to be in a room with 6,000 people and all of them focused on a bigger tomorrow. All of them know that there's more. All of them know that they have crappy, limiting beliefs, that they have old stories that have not served them well. And they're ready for a new story, a new belief, a bigger future. And to have that much energy in one room, my God, it was so addicting. It was so empowering. And I was lucky enough to have so many of my dean students come. I got to run into so many of you. I'm sorry if I missed you. I tried. It was a busy. You know, how crazy it was there. And I also had some really good friends of mine, dear to my heart, come to the event. One I've known since fifth grade and totally got him on track. Sometimes I. A prophet's not welcome in their own town, right? He's my friend. I'm always encouraging him. But to watch Tony gave him a different perspective. And now he's ready to jump in with real estate. He literally has called us nonstop today. He's like, okay, I'm ready. So good stuff. So, anyway, there was an exercise I did with Tony that I wanted to kind of twist and play a little because I knew it would really make an impact on you guys. So I wanted to take that here today and really address some of the things. Because the more I dig deeper into my life, the more I see my successful students and meet and shake their hands at live events or hear them on the phone or read their posts, I realize more and more that if I don't give you the tools to actually get in the game, to overcome your fear, to get rid of the stories, that the techniques we share are worthless. Guys, I know my book, 30 Days to Real Estate. Cash alone can get you in the game. So why isn't everybody who has that book doing it? It's because of all the other factors in their life. Those of you go to my amazing live events or you're coming down to the edge, or you're an insider elite member. And I know I have an army of people making money, but those of you making money, I want you to go faster. And those of you that haven't done a deal Yet I want you in the game. So, only thing I know to do is to deliver everything that gets me over my hurdles and what gets my top students over their hurdles and all the people I get to meet. So here's what I want to talk about today. If you are not getting the success you want in real estate or in your life, and I'm going to. I'm going to make this broader so you can use this exercise for anything in your health, in your weight, in your relationship, in life or in real estate. It's because deep down, when you boil it all down, there's something you're afraid of. There is. There's something you're fearful of. So I want you to do this exercise and I want you to write down what's your biggest fear? What is your biggest fear? If it's in your personal life, did you have a bad relationship? And deep down, knowing that relationships could cause pain, your subconscious linked pain and relationships and you've sabotaged every relationship you've had since then because your subconscious is trying to protect you. Because deep down, you're fearful that it's going to equal pain again. Have you in real estate, did you have parents or grandparents that went through the Depression and they told you your whole life that if you make the wrong move, if you step outside the box, if you don't paint inside the lines, if you don't follow and walk the line like everybody else does, that you could lose everything, that you could start over and you'll look stupid, you'll look silly, you'll go broke, you'll go bankrupt? Is that a fear of yours? Without even realizing, if you really dig deep, what's your fear? Do you have a fear of failing? Do you have a fear of not looking good in front of your peers? Do you have a fear of making a mistake? Do you have a fear of talking to people? What if someone calls me off a bandit sign or a Craigslist and they want to talk to me about real estate? I don't know what to do. What is your fear? I would love for you to stop this video, if you can, right now. And really not, you know, you're probably saying, dean, no, I tried this. It's because I don't have time. It's because I try to go deep, like the seven levels deep. If you ever did that, go deeper on finding the root, your fear. Pause this right now and write down, what is that fear? Then when you come back, or if you do this at a later date, I want you to write Down. What that fear has cost you to date. What does that fear cost you? If you have a fear of failure and that paralyzes you at any given moment, you're going to jump in, you're going to make that. So many of my students, I'm going to digress from it. So many of my students say, dean, it's not working for me yet. I'll say, how many offers have you made? Well, none. How come? What if I make the offer wrong? What if the person laughs at me? What if I fail? I'm not going to discredit that because that's a true fear of that person. But what does that fear cost them to date? No deals. Spent money for education you're not taking action with. You're going back to a job that you don't like, or you still have the bills that you can't pay, or you still are letting down the people that you want to take care of. You still can't let your wife stay home and raise the kids so they're there, or vice versa. You can't retire your parents, you can't keep money away for your kids. You can't put money in your college fund or in your retirement fund so you can be secure when you're older, or maybe you are retired, or maybe you're a baby boomer. It's been in a job way too long that you weren't supposed to be in. If you boil down to what it's cost you and you start listing what it's cost you, it's cost you stress, time, love, affection, empathy, all these things that could literally be boiled down in a lot of cases to a couple fears. And it could be one deep fear. You know, so many people have a fear of inadequacy. You know, they had. Maybe your parents were tough on you, maybe there was a teacher, maybe friends. Maybe it was just a time we grew up when people weren't so touchy feely. I mean, you know, my father's generation, my father was heading towards 80. His generation didn't think about heart and emotions. It was just do it my way or the highway, right? And maybe those things live deep inside of you. Well, I'm here to ask you today to dig in and find what your biggest fears are and go through a deeper level of pain. Yes, a deeper level of pain. To find out what those fears have cost you up until this point in your life. And then once you have that, stop the tape and think about this. What if you overcame that fear? What if you overcame that fear. What if you overcame the fear? Let's just say relationships, I'll diversify. You have a fear that getting in a relationship can equal pain. That makes you sad. And it's easier to just be alone. That's a fear. That's a deep fear. But what does that cost you? That's cost you love. It's cost you connection. It's costing you the bonding of someone else to share your life with someone else. To laugh, to joke, to dance, to cry. That's what it's cost you. But I want you to write down what if Immediately, right now. Don't think how you're going to do it at this moment. Just say, I could take that fear and overcome it. What if that fear of a relationship was just extinguished from your mind? Went in there with an eraser, scratched it off. I want you to write down what you could gain by overcoming that fear. Write all of it. Is it wealth? Is it independence? Excuse my sloppy writing. Is it love? Is it time? And make a list. I don't care if it's a hundred things. If this fear wasn't in your life, what would be there in your life? Okay. Because what I want to tell you is that fear can be conquered and how it can be conquered. And I've shared this before, but just getting back from Tony's event and spending a half a day with him, you know, the best thing about Tony is he lives what he does. He's not a guy that goes up on stage and gives you all these tools and then goes home and lives this totally inadequate life. No, he's the man. He is at his house as he is when I'm at dinner with him or he's up on stage. And I love and admire that. And he admires that about me because I'm teaching him real estate right now. So his in laws can do it and. And then he could buy a portfolio and we just have a great friendship. But it's so amazing when people are actually who they are. And when he talks about this, it's what changed my life. It's what I wrote about seven, eight years ago and totally fulfilled. This fear can be overcome with leverage. Because in most cases, that fear is a story that you've been telling yourself. This is kind of going deeper on what we talked about last week. That fear is a story that you've replicated over and over. And right now your subconscious mind is attached to that story. And no matter what you tell yourself on the outside surface, that fear resonates. And that's what's controlling you. Our decisions on a daily basis are what direct our life. If you decide to let that fear be the driving force to hold you back, your life will continue to be exactly how it is. You might go get some drinks one night and feel a little different. You might be on a high one day because someone looked at you. You had a glance, or you had a promotion, or you made extra money. High and then back. When you change and eliminate this fear, when. When you decide that it's over, it can't hold you back anymore. And this is what you get down here. So how do you change a fear? First of all, you got to get leverage and see that if other people have overcome that fear and live the life they want, then why can't you? If you're saying relationships are bad, is that true? Are relationships bad? That's like saying planes don't fly. Maybe yours doesn't, but planes fly. And that's like saying real estate doesn't work. Guys, I have an army of students all over the country changing their lives every single day in real estate. So does real estate work? Absolutely. So how do we dig into this fear and face it head on? Get leverage. If you want to quit smoking, go to a cancer ward at a hospital. You want to make money in real estate, go to Dean Graziosi.com, go to a real estate club and get leverage of other people doing it. Your fear is a freaking story that you've been telling yourself for way too long. You know, one of the tools that Tony uses is literally circle three times and put your finger up your nose and say your fear in Mickey Mouse's voice five times in a row. Honestly, the fear just disappears. So what I'd like you to do this week is take the time to do this exercise. And I want you to obsess on taking that fear and eliminating out of your life. Because if you look at all these things at the branches of the tree are my education, our life, the real estate market, loans from banks, loans from private money. Am I going to wholesale buy and hold? That's the farthest end of the tree. And as you get into the branches, that's your time. That's your effort. That's the action that you put in. But when you get to the trunk of that tree, the thing that can paralyze you the most is your deep rooted fear holding you back. Stop focusing on your fear. Focus on what you want. Make a decision today to overcome it. Get leverage, and let's get that out of your life. That's my message for today. If you're watching this on itunes, if you're watching this on YouTube, go get my new book, 30 Days to Real Estate Cash for free, @deansfreebook.com that's deansfreebook.com and watch the special training video I created for you right after I'm Dean Graziosi. I'll talk to you next week.