In this live motivational coaching session, Dean Graziosi urges viewers to replace avoidance and vague goal‑setting with concrete, committed actions. He explains that confidence follows courage, and that waiting for the “right moment” only reinforces comfort and regret. Dean shares personal anecdotes—his mother’s struggle, his own early financial independence—and uses them to illustrate how discomfort signals growth. He provides a practical framework: define actions with a specific who, what, and when; reduce the first step; set clear dates; and treat actions, not goals, as the metric of progress. The conversation also touches on integrating AI into daily routines to reclaim time, encouraging participants to list AI benefits and constraints. Throughout, Dean engages the audience, prompting them to commit to a specific action, emphasizing that commitment outweighs motivation and that identity shifts when decisions become final.
Chapters
Today, let's talk about what actually changes the outcomes. Because just identifying your goals is great, but it doesn't move the needle until actions happen. Intentions are awesome, goals amazing, but nothing happens until we move forward. So today's about choosing action instead of avoidance. Avoidance doesn't just feel feel like quitting. Sometimes avoidance can actually feel responsible or thoughtful or even smart because you say, well, maybe that would be risky. It'd be smart to just leave things the way they are. Takes us one person to say to you, hey, you should be happy with what you have, and you go, you know what, maybe I should avoid that. But if we get to the end of your life and you knew you had more gas in the tank, more things to do, more people to impact, more lives to change, more money to make, more legacy for your family, I believe at the end, man, that regret is going to weigh hundreds of thousands of pounds because avoidance quietly keeps us the same. Comfort has already cost people more than they can calculate. Wouldn't you agree? We choose convenience over commitment quite often without realizing it, even if the convenient part isn't serving the man or the woman we're meant to be. So I think besides setting a goal, today should be about Choosing commitment. Sometimes we're waiting to feel a little more confident to move forward. We hide hesitation and we call it preparation. But I just need to know a little more. I just need to read a little more. I just need to mess with my logo a little more. I just need to fix that one part of this a little more. Imagine a quarterback. Could you imagine if they waited until there was a receiver wide open and nobody around? Would they ever throw the ball? Oh, easy toss. No, quarterbacks are throwing it through this little window while someone's running full speed to try to hit them. And that's really what we have to realize is the confidence comes after the action. Courage predetermines if confidence ever comes. Confidence comes from being in the game, failing, succeeding, and then gaining the confidence to go. Og Mandino wrote, don't let your emotions dictate your actions. Let your actions dictate your emotions. Let your actions drive you. Do I feel inspired to work out? No, just start working out and then you'll get inspired. Acknowledge how avoidance shows up. Lack of confidence, waiting for the confidence, is it the right time, I want people to support me. Just look for all those nuances and say, bullshit, made a move yet. Let's just move, even if it's wrong. Sloppy is better than nothing. Wouldn't you agree? If we let avoidance to lean into what we wrote down for our new year, won't we kind of get the same results, just a new year? Same problems, new year. Same outcome, new year. And none of us want to get to January 2027 and say, damn it, I missed another year. Missed opportunities sometimes They just don't come back. We've all had opportunities we let go that didn't come back, and that's okay. Just let's not let them happen again. The worst person you could lie to, and the way you can exponentially have confidence erode, is to not keep promises with yourself. If you say you're gonna do it, I'm gonna do it this time, I'm gonna take the uncomfortable action, I'm I'm doing it this time. I don't care what anybody says. And then you don't, your subconscious goes, ah, big dreamer. No, I don't want to be that. Raise your hand if you'd like to share a promise that maybe you've let yourself down on, or a promise that you're going to keep in this new year.
The thing for me is working with AI, it's been so overwhelming. Last year I thought, no, not for me. It's crazy. Don't even want to consider it. I need to go for it. And like you say, you just, you need to go for it.
That's all. Sometimes when you face trying something new, our brain goes to, ah, I'm a little bit older. This technology's a little crazy. Can I really trust it? We create all these pieces in our brain, but when your brain starts to do that, there's two things that I like to do. I like to immediately stop my crazy brain, because we all have it, from doing that type of thinking, and I immediately start thinking about the end result once I do it. I work out every day of my life. If I think about getting dressed, going out in the cold or the heat, and then getting to the gym and then getting done and got to go through and do legs— I hate leg day— I don't want to do it. But when I think about when I'm done working out, it is this feeling of like, ah, I'm done for the day. But I stack it. Okay, I don't want to work out, but I want that feeling of being done. I want my kids to see a good example. I want to look good for my wife, and I want to be healthy and strong and clear, and I get my ass to work. What are some of the things if you make AI a part of your daily life? I would think about all the benefits, and you should write down all the benefits and the time you could get back in 6 months from now if you went all in on AI. When you think of the outcome, then don't think of all the steps. Oh, how am I going to make videos move? And how am I going to clone myself? How many maybe tomorrows have led to maybe next year? When you write down all the things you want to accomplish, and you write down the constraints, the things that could stop you. Don't take action on the one that's convenient or easy for you. Take action on the one that will actually move the needle the most.
I'm a single mom and emotion comes. I was in kind of survival mode, and this year I wanted to stop. I want to live. I know that I have inside of me the entrepreneur, and my survival mode is always bringing back to what's easy— find a job— and not being happy. This year, my decision is to get out of that mode?
First off, I'm sorry last year was in that survival mode. Remember, it's just a chapter in a long, amazing book. And when the book is done, you're going to realize that chapter had to happen for you to become the woman you are in 2026. And when you're in it, you don't understand that. I didn't. The reason I'm successful is because I watched my single mom work 3 jobs and we still got evicted from our house because she couldn't pay the rent. The reason I'm successful is because I watched that woman struggle and I'm like, I'm going to make sure she never struggles again. I retired my mom when I was 23. I've been giving my mom a check every week since I was 23 and she's 84 and I still do it. If that didn't happen, maybe I wouldn't be the man I am today. You don't have to celebrate the hard times, but you could at least stomach it to go, I guess that had to happen because I can feel your desire. I can feel your emotions. And sometimes the most creative things happen when our back's up against the wall. I would really spend the time on thinking, what actions can you take over the next 90 days that could get you a check while simultaneously serving someone else? Secondly, what could you say no to temporarily over the next 90 days and all of that extra time spent on the thing that could get you your first 2 or 3 clients? What if discomfort or feeling uncomfortable was actually the signal, right? You could feel the uncomfortableness when you do something new, right? If it feels easy, it's probably not worth doing. And if it feels uncomfortable, it's probably the thing that'll move the needle more than anything. Because growth doesn't feel convenient. If you want to build muscle, is it convenient? You got to work out pretty hard to build muscle, right? Anything that you want to do, it's just not convenient until it is. We have to do the workout, we have to sweat, we have to do a little bit of extra now, and then it gets a lot easier. It doesn't have to feel this uncomfortable forever. And the truth of the matter is, when you do those things that don't feel comfortable, it actually stretches you. Then you get used to it. Just know this: Moving puts you in charge. What if there's at least one action you could commit to? You could put it in the chat. What would you commit to doing that you haven't done that you've been putting off? Exercise, your marketing plan, meditation book. I love that. These are actions. Let's not look at these as goals. And if it's framed as a goal, I want you to frame it as an action. And remember, Being vague can help keep action avoidance alive. So be specific. Remember, action has a who, a what, and a when. It needs all three of them. I'm going to have that conversation. With who? What are you going to say? When are you going to have it? Be specific. Heather, you are the example, the epitome of what everybody should be thinking and doing. Date, time, clear. Set a date. I love that, Diana. Set a date. Look on your calendar right now and set a date. Reduce the size of the first step. Follow me over the whiteboard. Did you guys ever see that meme that's got two ladders? So many times we're like, I don't want to make these little steps. I want bold, I want big, I want the world to know I'm here. This person's just jumping, trying to get the first rung, or this person's like, all right, one small step at a time. So what's one small step towards what you already mentioned that you could do today, tomorrow, this week, and have momentum or have it done? Because momentum begins with even the smallest uncomfortable move. Don't leave something open-ended. Give it that date. Not only a date to start, the date that you're going to complete it or have a decision. If we follow these things, soon enough, that fear won't talk you out of it. So I think in this case, Commitment beats motivation. What if you get rid of the B plan? What if you don't renegotiate with deadlines once you decide? Identities change when decisions become final. I'm doing this no matter what, no matter who gets uncomfortable. What if we let action be the thing that shifts you into the perfect person that just gets stuff done.
