The BEST Advice For Entrepreneurs - Dean Graziosi

If you know someone wealthy, that means at some point, somewhere in the generations, someone took a stand and said, enough is enough. And they were the breakout person who went from broke to making an impact, to making a change, to changing the legacy of the people below him. People will love you, listen to you, learn from you, and buy from you when they feel understood, not when they just understand you. If you know somebody that's in an amazing relationship or they're an incredible parent, but they came from dysfunction, that means there was a point where someone said, enough is enough, and they made a stand. They drew a line in the sand, basically, and changed future generations. With all the changes and the craziness going on in the world, isn't it time for all of us to take a stand, to say enough is enough in our own lives, for society, for. For the human race? Listen, I drew my family's history here because I think it's so important to see how radical change can happen in a moment. It's not handed down. It's not a gift. If previous generations didn't do it for us, for the human race, then it's our time. We must stand up. We must decide that we are the generation that can make change for ourselves, for our family, and for the world. So I want to give you a little history here. I think it's really important. In 1901, and I know all this because my father is 84 years old tomorrow, and he has the greatest memory ever. My son was inherited that memory, and he shared with me all these stories, and I know him probably better than anyone in my life. But in 1901, my grandfather, Carmen Graziosi, left Italy and came to the United States with nothing. Now, my grandfather, Carmen, left because he was in a very abusive family, physically abused. So he said, enough is enough, and he left and came to America with nothing. Didn't even speak the language. He got here, he married my grandmother, Myrtle Howell, and they have 12 children. Now, unfortunately, my grandfather didn't stop the dysfunction. He physically abused all 12 of his children. He physically abused my grandmother. My father tells me horrific stories. They finally divorced. My father was the youngest of 12. My grandmother was blind in one eye because at one point she was pregnant. And I guess my grandfather didn't want to have another baby. And he punched her in the face while her glasses were on. And when she went on the floor, he took his heel and ground it. And I don't mean to be so graphic, but my dad tells me that story. It still sticks in my head. I've Never shared it publicly ever in my life. He took his heel and ground it into her face, and she went blind in one eye. That's what my grandmother dealt with. Massive dysfunction. Finally, she left him. And unfortunately, none of the brothers and sisters really got help with all the craziness. So none of them really talked to each other. All my uncles and aunts, my father's brothers and sisters, none of them really talked to each other. My dad didn't talk to his own father when he passed away. He wasn't even talking to his mom at that moment because of family craziness. Right? You see how the dysfunction carries over. So My father, in 1963, marries my mom. Now, when he marries my mom, I'm betting he says, if I have children, I'm not going to hit them like my father, his father. My father's father hit him and beat him so bad in second grade that he said he was snapping the pencils. They didn't have pens back then. And he was snapping the pencil so much that they sent him home. And he missed second grade because he was so stressed about what his father had done to him. In 1963, he marries my mom and they have my sister and I. Now, like I said, my dad carries over and says, I am not going to hit my kids. But my dad didn't work on his emotional scars. And my dad was very confrontational. And by the time I was three, my parents were divorced and it was very ugly and craziness and moving all over and a lot of fighting. I won't go really deep in it, and this happens for us. I'm not complaining about my past. I wouldn't change one bit of anything. I'm the man I am today. I'm the father I am today, the husband I am today. Today. Because of this journey, I'm showing you how there can be a line in the sand for our own lives, for our family, for the human race, for our culture. So marries my sister, and my dad goes down a real bad path. I mean, to this day, my sister and him don't talk. He didn't talk to a lot of his brothers and sisters. My parents, I'll keep going on here, were married nine times. Between them, I moved 20 times. By the time I was 19 years old, we had massive dysfunction in the family. My parents on and off being depressed. I mean, it was so confrontational. I'll just give you this. At 11 years, 12 years old, I came home from school, went behind the dumpster at my dad's house, and I threw up blood and found out I had a bleeding ulcer. My grandmother brought me to the hospital, found out I had a bleeding ulcer. And I would not tell my dad because then he would blame everybody else and it would be way more stress to share. So I didn't. Also, my parents didn't have money. I lived in a trailer park with my mom until we got asked to leave because we couldn't afford it at 12 or 12, I moved in with my dad. There was no heat in the house. The only thing he had was a little electric plug in heater. So we lived in the bathroom of the house probably six months through the whole winter. Never had money, Always stressed about money. Both my parents worked hard. My mom worked three jobs to make, you know, nothing, make 100 bucks a week. So money was always a problem. Stress, always a problem. I'd have new stepbrothers, stepsisters, then they were gone. I'd have new step grandparents that I love dearly and come home from school one day and say, pack up, we're leaving. Move in with another family, with my dad and get married. Have a new cool stepbrother. And then all of a sudden I find out they're fighting and it's horrific. And the cops come and we move out and just all kinds of dysfunction. Now why am I sharing this? Not surely because of poor me, because there was a line in the sand. I want to tell you this. My father's father, my grandfather, caused so much dysfunction that all his 12 children, I think 11 of them lived, 11 children, had so much dysfunction, they handed it down. When I went to high school in my little town in Marlboro, New York, I went to my town. I go to my teacher, Mrs. Marticello. The first day of school, she says to me, oh, my God, another Graziosi. Ugh, this is going to be fun. My cousins were so crazy because they handed down this dysfunction, they handed down the craziness. But when it got to me and my sister, this line in the sand, I want to tell you, the moment you decide enough is enough, that you are not settling, you're not going to repeat the mistakes of the past and past generations who didn't fix it, who didn't change it, who said they were, and they didn't. When you decided, I'm gonna be the one that below me nothing will ever be the same below this generation, nothing will be the same below that. I don't know, because I have to tell you, me and my sister, because of all the dysfunction we Lived in separate houses by the time I was 10. We never lived together. And before that I was with Graham, she was with mom. I wasn't the closest with my sister. I love her dearly and we're very close now but we weren't. But both of us had this desire to say we're not gonna be dysfunctional anymore. We're not gonna be broke anymore. We're not gon repeat the sins of the past, the depression, the dysfunction of the past. And we decided and I don't know if it was God, the universe, my grandmother, my mom, something inspired me personally to make a difference. Now I want to tell you, my sister married the greatest man you could ever imagine. My brother in law, Rob. They've been married for 30 years. They have two incredible children. Oh my God. Hunter and Tanner. Tanner works with me. He's my nephew. He's one of my top employees. Team member, I should say. He's amazing, well rounded, in a perfect relationship. My nephew Hunter, graduated top of this college, married already. Amazing business. My sister has an incredible business, self employed. I was blessed to have more success than I ever imagined possible. I have three incredible children. I have a wife that. I mean she's my best friend. I fall more in love with her every day. Did some of my past come over into my world? Yeah, until I fix it. I was married before and divorced, right. But I changed. I didn't like living in a bathroom. I didn't like the stress, I didn't like the dysfunction. I didn't like the no relationship with parent. I didn't like confrontation. And it just got to the point where I said enough. And my sister said enough. And here's what I know. Every generation past me will not reflect the same as all the disaster before me. Do I? Would I change any of it? Hell no. And that's why I wanted to do this video today from my heart to ask you to share with you. Don't you want to be the one that said enough is enough for you, Enough is enough for your family. Enough is enough for our society, the human race that we could take a stand in all areas and say I'm drawing a line in the sand. This isn't something we're going to fix someday. This isn't something somebody else is going to to fix for me or for other other people. There's no knight in shining armor coming to save us. It's on us. And when you take responsibility for it, oh my God. When you take responsibility for old beliefs, I have to tell you the Beliefs of multiple generations, of dysfunction are still inside of me. My father instilled. I love him dearly now, and we're in a different space, but he instilled some really shitty, for lack of a better word, beliefs inside of me that I had to purge out. Because if I kept those beliefs, I would get what they had. If I kept those beliefs about money, I'd be broke. If I kept those beliefs about family, I'd be single. I'd have massive dysfunction. If I kept those beliefs about being a parent, being married, I would keep getting divorced over and over again and keep screwing things up. Same with my sister. If we take the sins of the past in our society and the human race, we will keep repeating this generation after generation, and enough is enough for us and the world. What if we just declare today, this moment, right now, that we're going to be that person for our family? We're going to be the one that shifts everything. We're going to be the ones that in three generations from now, they're going to look back and say, oh, my God. My grandmother, you know, she came from this, and she. Other people in her family settled and they thought this. But my grandmother, my God, she just. She took a stand and these are now my new values. These are. This is my new culture. This is what we've done. Wouldn't that be the greatest gift you could give? And if, you know, I mean, think about it. When success happens, we could help solve problems, right? We could solve with our actions. The books we read, the people we surround ourselves with, the words we use, the actions we take. We can also help by cutting checks and helping foundations go faster and quicker. Like, that's what life is about, growth and contribution. This just shows that I was blessed to grow. I'm lucky. I don't know how I got here, but I did. But we don't have to make it luck. We can make a conscious decision to move forward. I made conscious decisions to model other successful people, not my family. I decided to read books and go to masterminds and gain capabilities to make a shift. And you can make that decision right now, wherever you are. And it doesn't mean your life has to be this horrific. It just means that maybe you want to make a shift. Maybe it's time for something new. Maybe it's time to have this line in the sand in your lineage. And when people look back, they know you took a stand, you made a difference. This message was on my heart. This is my family. This is where we are. And I Believe all Graziosis below. My sister, well, their maiden name is Graziosi. And my children, doesn't matter how much wealth they have, the wealth will be inside of them. The success will be who they are as a part of this human race, the contribution they give to the world, the growth they continue to have and how they pass that down to their children. Like handing off a baton of the success baton, not the dysfunction baton. Thank you so much for allowing me to share my family's journey. Now please know I wouldn't change one bit of it. This made me the human I am today and I'm proud of the person I am. But I'm betting as I was sharing one part of it or multiple parts hit you maybe in your relationships or the way you parent or the income that you create or the career you're in or the society that we're in and bonding the human race and not settling anymore, not allowing the past to repeat itself, to stand up and say enough is enough. This is the generation. This is the time. I'm the one to do it. No one else can do it for me. If you feel that way, then I did my job sharing my personal life today. Thanks so much for being with me. Thanks so much for listening or watching. If you'd love more of this, then go to deansnextlevel.com deansnextlevel.com see how you can be a part of my inner circle where I do trainings like this every single month live. I'd love to have you there answering your questions as they come in and helping deliver the capabilities that can allow us all to go to another level. The 10 most important things I've learned about being about marketing or being a great marketer are those same exact things. It's all about them and how you make them feel. Think about that and you could go off the slide there, Mike. People will love you, listen to you, learn from you and buy from you when they feel understood, not when they just understand you. When I talked about the story with my kids, the reason I told you to stick around is because it's the same in your business. It's the same with your spouse, it's the same with your co workers, it's the same with your employees. It's the same with your employer or the person above you. It's the same if you're going to sell online, if you're going to buy a house, if you're going to sell a house. It's all the same. People will buy from you learn from you, sell to you if they feel understood. Number two, enter their worlds and finish their sentences. What's going on in their head right when you want to buy, sell. You want to fix your relationship, meet with your kid, anything you want to sell online, create a book, get real estate, whatever it is you need to enter conversations. They already have. We all so many times I watch marketers. They love their product, love their service, love what they're doing. And they go out and says, people just need this. People do not buy what they need. Remember that. They buy what they want, they take what they want. People need to stop eating sugar. People need to go to the gym six days a week. People need to maybe stop smoking, stop drinking, but they won't do it until they want to. And how do you do this? By entering conversations in their head. Number three, talk to the point. Say what you mean. So many people just ramble, ramble, ramble. You want to get to the benefits, you want to get to how it can affect their life. How can you get this deal? How do we make this happen? How do we fix this relationship? How do we go the next level? Say what you mean. Don't beat around the bush. 4. Be enthusiastic and authentic people. Respect, honesty, transparency. Listen, if I came up here and changed, shared this with you today, I was like, so today we're gonna learn about some ways I think I'm a good dad. And I hope that you will find it. You wouldn't listen to me, like, I'm bored. I can't date this anymore, right? Find enthusiasm. How do you find enthusiasm? Rob it from the past. Find something you were courageous, you conquered, you accomplished when you were younger and just rob the way you felt that day and let the enthusiasm come out. At the moment you're on. Tell fun stories. Marketing is storytelling. Tell them fun stories. If you pull that slide up, tell them fun stories with empowering messages wrapped in. You think you can't sell, you think you can't market. Tell a story. That's where people get engaged. If you look at all my videos, I do tell real life stories so you can feel and be a part of it. Storytelling is marketing. Number six, reward good behavior. Unexpectedly, this is my eighth year of doing weekly wisdoms. I just send them to my clients unexpectedly. You get my book and you get these three four minute videos. Not this intense training that we're doing. But I've been doing those videos once a week for eight years. When I find something new, I send it out to my clients. When I discover something I always want to be that person that just one day go, oh, whoa. Dean sent me this. I didn't even ask for it. In life, when you do that to people you work with, you do that to people you buy houses from or sell houses to, or a banker or someone who rehabs your houses, or if you do it when starting a new company or do it with your spouse or do it with friends or co workers, you just bring in and say thank you. A letter this week, literally this week, write three handwritten letters to people who have made an impact on your life and just mail it to them. And watch how your life exponentially changes. This week, even if they don't even call you, it just does. You put it out to the world, reward unexpectedly. Next is they know when you care and they know when you fake it. I hope as you watch me here today, when I talk with no teleprompter and no script and nobody telling me what to say, I hope you know that this is as real as I can be. I hope you know when I'm going through things, I share it. I don't try to cover it. When I tell you I fail. I don't pretend to be perfect and know it all. What I do know is that I'm evolving and I'm learning and I pay a lot of money to learn. And I share with you what's best. And I hope you know that I'm not faking it right? And that's what people need in marketing. Number eight. When problems arrive, instead of blame, find the root cause in your relationships, in your business. You want to take your business to the next level. Don't blame your clients. Find out what the root cause is. If you're not getting deals, if, if you're not selling deals, if your, your refunds are high or you, you know, in your personal life, or the partner you're gonna, you're gonna work with or the money you wanna raise or the capital you wanna raise or find out what the problem is. Find the root cause. Remember the story about Brianna? It wasn't she didn't want to go to school. It was the girl that treated her bad at lunch. When I found it, I fixed it down here, everything blossomed on the top. Number nine, Be the person you want them to be. They feel incongruency. You know, I see people that are overweight and they're sloughing diet stuff online. There's people that tell you how to do time management who are late to their meetings. There's people who Tell you, you know, financial advisors are the best. I have so many people come to me and go, I want to manage all your money. And I go, where's your money? And how much did you make on your money last year? And they're always like, well, what's that got to do with it? It's like, what do you mean, what's got to do with it? If you can't make a shit ton of money on your own money, what are you gonna do with mine? It's like people who come to us and say, we can rank you on Google, top of the charts. Somebody Google's real estate, someone Google's success, you could be first. I'm like, well, what's the name of your company? If I Google you, how come you're not in first? Well, yeah, be congruent if you want to. If you want to, just be the person you want them to be, if you're a parent. But also be congruent to your message and what you're selling. And then you don't have to remember it. You don't have to. My grandmother told me the best things. She goes, when you tell the truth, you don't have to remember it. And number 10, be the observer of your own thoughts and how they affect them. Just, let's just say I think the number one thing that you could do to help go to another level is be the observer of your thoughts. If you're stuck, if you're going through a tough time, I'm sorry, if you've been trying to get into real estate or any business and just not getting there yet, or going to the next level, or you're doing a certain amount of deals and it's hard to find that next level. There's a lot of reasons. I'm not going to pretend I know it all. I won't sit here and say, just do this magic fish formula and all will be fine. But I do know this. When I'm stressed, when I feel I can't do it, when I feel overwhelmed, when I feel anxious, it's always my thoughts. Always, always, always. 100% of the time. We've all already accomplished so much. We've all already conquered fears and worries, maybe death in the family, someone you loved left or broke a relationship or passed away a business failed that you didn't get the promotion. You've already handled so much in your life and you've overcome. And here's what I know is the harder the obstacle to overcome, as hard as it is, you come out Stronger on the other side, without a doubt. Winston Churchill had the greatest quote. He said, when you're in hell, your only option is to keep going. Because what happens in so many cases, we're in hell and we freeze and we hope it'll just get better or we go back and we walk deeper into hell. So Winston Churchill said, when in hell, just keep going. And I want to tell you what can help you keep going is observe those thoughts of yours. Realize when they're not, they're not good thoughts, when they're disempowering thoughts, when they're robbing you of the next level. Just see if this is your goal. You know, I always talk about finding your vision and clarity on where you want to go and you're here. What are the thoughts and the story in between? You clear those out and replace them with empowering thoughts and empowering emotions like courage and confidence and strength and discipline or fortitude or whatever word you want to use. When you replace that, all of a sudden, that story, those thoughts, they just get narrower and narrower and you realize they can't stop you anymore. I hope you enjoyed seeing behind the curtain of one of our inner circle trainings where each month we, we teach next level mindset, marketing and momentum. The three M's that I believe are the difference between wanting more and actually achieving more. If you'd like to be a part of our inner circle, we created a really special opportunity in these unprecedented times. Well, they're unprecedented times. So we created an unprecedented opportunity. And right now you can go to deansnextlevel.com that's deansnextlevel.com watch a quick video and see how you could be part of the inner circle for less than about a movie and dinner a month and gain those next level capabilities to thrive in these uncertain times. What's up? What's up? Hey, before you go, you need to watch these next few videos. They're absolute game changers. Hurry up and click right over here and watch them and I'll see you there. Sam.