Use This TRICK to STOP Self Sabotage

Can you be the partner, the parent, the friend? Can you be the real best version of yourself when you know deep down you're stuffing your dreams aside for other people? Work on the hardest things first, because once you do, then it's like I schedule Mondays and Tuesdays for calls and meetings with the teams because truth is, I don't like meetings. I don't. I don't like going through spreadsheets and KPIs and SOPs and counting numbers. But I have to or else I wouldn't be in business. So I just schedule them for Monday and Tuesday and then I get to be in my creative space on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, sometimes Saturday and Sunday. I want to share this. I wrote this in another training I did. Look at this stuff knowledge brokers do or self education industry. You could put this if you're not in that business, which I know the majority of you are, but you could put anything. But this is the stuff that knowledge brokers do. We answer emails. We surf online looking for what others are doing. We browse social media and see if anything interesting is going on. We create specific to do lists. We obsess on your name or your logo. We ask friends and family their opinions. We worry about what could go wrong. We obsess on thinking that we need to know everything before we launch so we got to be perfect. We think if we build it people will just come. We read things that feed us with self doubt. We put off things that are uncomfortable until another day and the list goes on of what we do. But what should we be doing? Stuff that actually matters. Identifying your first or next dot. Create and lay out the program, build the course and set a date that it's going to go live. Let the world know through effective marketing. Deliver your training and then do more of the above. Sometimes there's a lot of gray area that lives between those lines. Wouldn't you agree? And at the end of the week you go damn, I was so busy. But did you really work on the needle movers? That's the important part. That's the part we have to ask ourselves. That's the part we need to go deeper on. None of us are perfect at this. I work on this with myself all the time. But what I'm sharing with you, this is not stuff that is somebody else's journey. This is the stuff I get to do. Take what serves you, throw the rest away. If there's something I share today, like that's stupid, that's okay. But I want to tell you I've Tried everything. I obsess on these strategies. I want to be more effective. I want to show up and be here for you. But simultaneously, I want to be honest with you. I don't want to take that time away from my wife. I found the love of my life, and I fall more in love every day. I love being a dad. I love my team. I love creating. I love innovating. I decided this weekend I'm going to write my next book right now. I'm going to start soon. I'm writing my next book. It's the world needs it, right? I want to do all these things. I got two new companies I started with Tony. I'm investing in things. There's so many things I'm doing. So the only way that I can do those things and be here and be more present with you and not take it away from my children is I really need to know what I'm working on on a regular basis and say some hard no's. Right? I need to say no to so many things so I can say yes to you, yes to your success, yes to little Luca and Brianna and Brody. And my daughter just decided she wants to go really all the way in on pitching. Like she said, I want to crush high school and. And pitch all through high school. But I'm not going to say no to you. But I audit my time and I'm figuring out every single month, like, what's got to go because I'm going to catch for my daughter. My son's got baseball practice two days a week with two games on the weekend. I'm not missing the practices or the baseball. This seems impossible, doesn't it? Like, do you ever think about it and be like, how the hell do you get all that done? And I know all of you are busy. I'm not bragging. I've just found a way to always audit my time. What to say no to. To discipline myself, to measure what matters and do what matters to. Some of you could give two craps about some of the things I like, but that's okay. This is what makes my DNA. But you need to find your DNA, what's important to you, and start saying no. Start saying no. Being selfish is good now. Not always, of course, but being selfish in your time, that allows you to provide yourself. The things that to reach your full potential is the place where you need to be selfish. Because we think giving amongst ourselves, if you're here, you're the person that probably helps lead your family. You're the person most people Go to for advice. You're the, you know, they say you want something done, ask the busiest person. You know, you're probably the busiest person other people know. Right. That's why you're here. Right. So what happens is we feel not only certainty and significance, which is neither one is bad, but we've become the people who say yes to help other people. Yes to being super mom, yes to being super dad, super wife, friend, lover, mother, daughter, whatever it is that you are. But let me ask you something. I'm going to tell you a quick story. A dear friend of mine, Ethan Willis, he's got eight children and he sold his company. He's an amazing dad. I learned so much from this guy. He sold his company about eight years ago, seven years ago, and said, I'm just going to be a full time dad. And he did it for about three months and he felt that he was losing his edge. He felt that he wasn't showing his kids an example of utilizing all the gifts that God gave him. And he felt like I should do this. And all of a sudden his wife, who's amazing, came to him and said, you know what, I love that you're helping me and I love having you home. But God gave you different gifts than he gave me. God gave you different gifts than all of us. And if you want to set the greatest example for your children, I think you should go out and utilize those gifts and show them what's possible. He's still the most amazing dad on the planet. She's still an incredible wife. He went out and started two other companies, one of them with me, another company. And he's out there still being a great dad, still being a leader in his church. Well, simultaneously his kids look at him and go, he damn look what's possible. I want your children, your relatives, your friends, your spouse to see who you are meant to be your next level. You're an eight cylinder engine and a lot of us are running on four and six cylinders. Don't you want the world to know you at full potential at 8 cylinders, running smooth and see what's possible to show your daughters, your friends, your family what's inevitable when you don't give up. So when I say being selfish is good, when you go back to what I said on the whiteboard and you schedule your time with discipline, we must schedule our time. Put it in our binder as if it was a doctor's appointment. When you schedule that time, it's time to say, mom, dad, wife, sister, whatever you are, needs this hour needs this three hours. So I can be the best version of me. Because let me just ask you something. When you know, can we get real for a second? Barry Baumgartner said this at the event. She goes, can I go level five? I'm like, what the heck's level five? She says, can I talk to you as if you're a dear friend with no cushion? Can you be the wife? I say wife, husband, spouse, significant other, partner. Can you be the partner, the parent, the friend? Can you be the real best version of yourself when you know deep down you're stuffing your dreams aside for other people? Can you really be the best version of yourself if you're stuffing your dreams down because your husband thinks you should be happy with what you're doing? Are you really the best version of yourself, or do you slowly build resentment? Do you slowly have envy of other people doing it? Let's be honest. Can we just say it? So when do you get the best version of you? When you become who God or the universe designed you to be. And for that, we must be selfish. We with certain amount of time, we must say, this is Mom's time. This is my time from four to six, from two to five, whatever the time is, this is your time. So schedule it. Be selfish with it, because then you get to show them what's possible. And I think that's the greatest gift you could give your family and friends. So being selfish is good, Sam.