Weekly Wisdom - The Superpower You Have!

Dean Graziosi argues that giving first without keeping score is a superpower for building relationships and opportunities. He credits reciprocity with his partnerships with Tony Robbins and Richard Branson, and urges you to do something meaningful for others this week expecting nothing back.
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Good morning. Good morning. Welcome to Weekly wisdom number 447. Wow, it's been a lot in a row. Hey, today I want to share with you while everybody's coming on. I'm just going to talk here a little bit, but I want to share with you today the number one superpower that you already have, that you already own, that you could be doing today, you could be utilizing today if you knew how to harness its power. Power. It's the thing that can move the needle the fastest in your life. It's the thing that get doors open to get people to say yes without manipulating, without pushing, without overselling. It's the one thing that most all of us do wrong. Most all of us yield this power, yet we don't know we have it or people told us or shared with us how to do it. Completely wrong. So if you're watching right now, good morning, wherever you are in the world, or if you're watching the replay whenever you see this, that's great. But those of you here, Nancy and Jasna and David, it's a pleasure to have you here live. This is going to be one for the record books. I believe that I shared this yesterday with my monthly live training group that I do. And they went nuts because of the value and the power. So right now, while we're live, hit the share button. Hit the like button right now. You're going to want everybody, you know, to see this. And that's kind of saying, you know, it's kind of floating my own boat here. But I'm just chatting while people are coming on. They're pouring on right now. Emily, how does. Nice to see you. Julian, Anna, Alby, good morning. Good to see you guys. Aman Fernandez. Good morning, dude. Hope you're awesome. Marcel, Alicia, good to have you guys here. We're going to talk about what I believe to be the number one superpower we all have. We all have access to. Diana, good to see you this morning. Janelle. Joanne Burnett, good to see you. Jackie, what's going on this morning? Let's get this out to everybody. Hit the share button. Hit the like button right now. Well, you shouldn't hit like button yet. I could say something really idiotic and not good, but I doubt that I'm going to try to deliver my best today. I'm in a great. The sun's coming up. Wait, can you see that sun coming through the trees right there? It's morning. I'm in my backyard. I'm gonna go have breakfast with my kids. But you guys are first. Okay, so here we go. We got a lot of people on. They're still coming in right now. There's one superpower that we all ignore. And again, yesterday I shared this with my. I do a monthly live training with a high end group. They're amazing group of people. We get hundreds of comments. It's a great buzz. And it hit such a nerve that I wanted to share it with you guys today. And that one superpower, the one that we ignore, the one that we use wrong, the one that we weren't taught how to use, is called reciprocity. Now reciprocity is. It seems like you're like, oh, Dean, that's it. That's the word. Yeah, reciprocity. Because here's what I think. Here's the definition of reciprocity. When you do something for someone, first they feel obligated to become even to do something back for you. Now that could sound like manipulation, but it's not. I'm going to tell you a better definition in a moment, but just think about that. If you go to lunch with somebody and before they grab the bill, you grab it and go, no, no, this one's on me. I got it. What does the person always say? Oh, are you sure? Or next time I have lunch. How about, did you ever be around the holidays? It's Christmas or your birthday and it's Christmas birthday or whatever it is. Let me move out of the sun here. And someone sends you a card that wasn't on your list to send them a card, right? What's up, Liberio? Mary Sarah, Sharifka, good to see you guys. Did you ever get a card around the holidays that you weren't on your list to send to them? You're like, oh my God, I gotta hurry up and get out there and get them a card. I didn't know they were sending or get a birthday gift. Like, oh my God, they gotta go on the birthday list. Or someone gives you a simple compliment. What if someone says, oh my God, I love those shoes. You're like, thank you. Oh, these. You know, I was gonna tell you I loved your blouse. I loved your new hairdo. It is a rule. This is a rule of our gut, of our nature. Ye. Is there some narcissists out there that don't feel that way? Yes, but the majority of when somebody does something first or gives you a compliment or sends you a gift or does a service for you, we feel internally obligated to become even. That's what we do. So reciprocity could be taken as manipulation, or it could just be a part of your life. Because here's what I know. When you reach out first, when you do something for someone first, that's when bondings, that's when a bond happens. That's when the deal happens. That's when you partner with somebody. That's how you fix a bad relationship. That's how you gain respect from your children, from your parents. You see, somehow life has gotten to us that if someone does something for me, then I'll do it for them, right? If they do it for me, then I'll do it for them. Because we also keep score. You know, many times that I've done this for so and so and I never get anything back. Well, I'm going to give you a little secret. My dad, who I love dearly, and this is no way being negative, but my dad was the youngest of 12. He was in an abusive relationship. His parents, his dad was abusive. He went through a lot of trauma as a child and I can't even imagine what he went through. But he got so taken advantage of in his life that when I was a kid, he would always tell me, you're too nice. You give to too many people, they're going to take advantage of you. And I used to think that was a weakness of mine. I used to think that, you know, if I give too much and people take advantage, I'm never going to be anywhere. And I want to tell you this story because it had such an impact on my life and you might have read about it in my book. Sorry, I'm moving around here because I'm excited. When I was about 22 years old, I was nothing. I was working on 20 something. 20 nothing, I should say. And I was working on cars every day. I owned a collision shop. I was working on apartments at night. I'd work all day on cars, fixing them. I work at night on my apartments. I had hardly any money in the bank. I was barely getting by. But I always had great ideas. And I had an idea to come up with etherapy chat therapy. It was when AOL messenger first came out. And I come up with this idea. And there was a guy in my town who had a lot of money, great dude. I had fixed his car. We had a mutual friend. I tell him about it. He's what I thought was the most wealthy person in our town. And he worked in New York City, had this great house, got this great office. He was a badass. And he said, you know, I like your idea. So he sets up this meeting and takes me down to New York City and we're in the car, we're in his Jaguar and I'm like looking at this car and it's all digital and it's amazing. And he said, before we get down there, I want to ask you a couple things. What do you think your biggest strengths are? And I told him I get done. I said, what do you think your biggest weakness is? And I said, well, my biggest weakness is I give so much of myself and I trust people and I always get taken advantage of. So if I truly crack this code, I need to be, I need to watch myself, I need to not be so giving and not trust so many people. And he said, really? You think that's your biggest weakness? He's like, pretty funny. You're in my car right now. I'm taking a 20 nothing year old down to venture capitalists who are worth hundreds of millions of dollars. You got grease under your nails still from working. You have no college education. You don't have any money to put your own money to put in this product. And I'm taking you down there to meet with them. I'm taking you down there because of that strength, not because that's your weakness. You got it all wrong. And he said to me, here's what I want you. And this is so great. And I said this yesterday in my training, I'm going to say it again now. I'm going to call him and thank him today. He said to me, I want you to think about something in your life. When you look back, you're going to look at all the people that took advantage of you, that you were too kind to, that never gave anything back. And he said, then you're going to look at the people like me. He goes, you're in this car because. And I had forgot, I did something for his car. I helped him out, I helped his wife on something. I didn't even know I did all that. He goes, you're in this car because you gave to me before I gave to you. He goes, when you look back in your life, you're going to realize you got ripped off, you got screwed, it's going to be this big. But all the relationships you meet, all the people you help, all the lives that you've changed, all the things that you do, the partners that you have will be the size of the sun. And if you just sit there and stay small, you'll never go anywhere. And I look back in my life and oh my God, I've gotten screwed over. I had an accountant rob all my money when I needed it the most. I had partners rob for me. I had people take advantage of friendships and relationships. It's this big. But I partnered with Tony Robbins. I partnered with Brandon Lewis. I partnered with Steve Thorne. All these amazing people in my life who've generated hundreds and hundreds of millions of dollars with me, who changed millions of lives around the world. I own real estate around the world with my partner, Matt Larson. I mean, all these amazing people that I've attracted in my life because I gave first, because I trusted you. See, there's a lot of people in your life that took advantage of you. There's no question about it. There's a lot of people have done you wrong. There's people you've given to and given you nothing back. And what it does, it shuts us down, and it makes us think, no, if I give, I'll get hurt. No. Giving and doing something first, which is reciprocity, is your secret to the next level of life. It's your gateway to wealth, to abundance, to joy, to happiness. It changes who you are. So there's a couple things that I don't want to make this an hour training, but what I want to tell you is my life has changed forever. And I know the value of reciprocity. Meaning do something for people without keeping score. Do something first. You know how I started my relationship with Richard Branson the billionaire is because me and my buddy Joe Polish raised a million dollars. Not that you have to go do that, but he's a billionaire. You got to make him know, right? But we went out and hustled and asked all our friends. We raised a billion dollars for his charity, Virgin unite. He gives 100% of it to build schools and give away. We did it without knowing anything we would get. We just did it. It was Joe's idea. He's the master at reciprocity. My buddy Joe Polish, him and I's relationship, we are the epitome of reciprocity. We do so much for each other, it's unbelievable. The Tesla I drive, he gave away. Gave to me for free. Now, I'm not bragging like big things because you could do it with a letter, you could do it with a smile, you could do it with a thank you. But Richard Branson, we gained. We raised a million bucks for him. Next thing we know, we're on his island with him on his private island for a week, sailing around the freaking island, talking to a billionaire for a week straight we didn't even know that was coming. Tony Robbins. When I first met Tony, he changed my life 15 years ago through videos and tapes. I wanted to do something for him. I worked my butt off, and I created a process for him that we had mastered and he hadn't yet. I gave it to his team. Tony literally took a picture of his black card, emailed it to me, and said, that's going to make me millions and change lots of lives. Charge me whatever you want. Of course, I didn't charge anything. But guess what? We've been best friends ever since. We talk things couple times a week. We just got done having dinner and spending time together because I did something first. If I would have looked back on the partner who screwed me, the accountant that robbed my money, the friends that took advantage of me, and I said, no, no, if Tony wants to be my friend, he'll do something for me. If I want to meet Richard Branson, maybe I'll just try. No, I just went ahead, did something first. And, you know, it could be as simple as a handwritten letter that you send out today. It could be as simple as just a smile. It could be as simple as reaching out to someone and doing something for someone you want to partner with, someone you want to do, be of service to, and don't keep score. Because here's what I know. Whether you believe in God, karma, the universe, the world. I believe in God. I believe all of it is watched. And sometimes you're giving to one person, you're getting nothing back. And you're like, I can't believe I'm getting nothing back. And all of a sudden, there's a tap on the shoulder, and something out of the blue comes to you. A new deal, a partner with money, a new relationship. And you're like, I wonder where that came from. It came from because you're giving first. The value of reciprocity is so much bigger than you can imagine. It is your superpower. If you're liking this right now, hit the like button, hit the share button. Let's get this out to other, because the world needs to know. Give first, don't keep score. And the last thing I want to share, and I shared this yesterday, one of the best things you could do today, best things you could do. If you're watching this, whether you're watching me live right now, Maria, Janice, Liberio, Gary, It's a pleasure to have all you guys here. Whether you're watching this live or you're watching it as a replay, Randy Gaard Good morning, dude. Good to see you. Look at that trout, dude. You're the trout master. When am I going? When are we going trout fishing, dude? Sherene. I hope I said that right. Janice, Per. Good to see all you guys this morning. One thing I'd ask you to do this week that might be hard is a couple of things. First off, who are you going to name some people, some things that you think you can't even get in control of, that you can build reciprocity with? Go out and do something amazing for somebody this week expecting nothing in return? Nothing. Write a letter. Do someone's lawn. Share your biggest secret in business. Help somebody, whatever it is. Clean out someone's garage. Just do something this week for one, two, three people. And if you could do it for somebody that could be your partner and make money, wonderful. But if you're just not, just do it for anybody and watch what happens. Prove me wrong. Come back here next week and say, dean, you're full of poop. Okay. Secondly, I'm going to ask you this. If there's someone in your life that took advantage of you, you could be a relative, a brother, a sister, a mother, a father, a child, a relative, an ex partner, an ex relationship, an ex wife, an ex husband that took advantage of you. Try to do yourself a favor this week and forgive them that anger that I'm sure if you got taken advantage of, it's the worst thing on the planet and you didn't deserve it. And it truly happened, and it was no reason, no fault of your own. But here's what I know. When you don't forgive people, the only person. You know this. You've heard this before, but I want to tell you in more detail. The only person it hurts is you. Because what happens is, even though it was that one person, you hold onto it. The next time you go to give to somebody, you're going to think, wow, if I do that, what if the same result happens? If you had someone who cheated on you and ended a relationship, the next time you think of just approaching somebody or giving someone in a relationship, you go, no, that could be painful because you didn't forgive the last person and you missed the relationship, you missed the partner, and you miss the new deal. You miss the opportunity for that next level of life because you're still holding on to somebody that hurt you in the past. Yes, I know you didn't deserve it. I did nothing to my accountant except give this guy love. And he got a gambling addiction and robbed all my money. I Did nothing but him. But I forgive him. Because if I don't forgive him, I won't get the next great accountant or person to work for my life because I won't trust anybody. I'll stay small. If Alan Guarino, which I'm going to thank this week, didn't have that conversation with me in that car, what if I said, no, no, no, I'm not doing anything until somebody does something for me because they're going to screw me over. They're taking advantage of me. No, I left my heart open and I got screwed a bunch more times in my life. I did things for people who did nothing back. I worked hours and passion and my heart and people did nothing back. But guess what? At the end of my life, I know I'm going to look back and it's this big. It's the size of a marble. And the abundance I've received, the love I've received, the joy I've received, the wealth I've received, the happiness I received is the size of the sun compared to the marble. So do you want to look back at your life when you're 100 or 90 years old and go, I played small because I didn't want to get hurt anymore and I didn't want to do things for people that didn't do back? Or do you want to say, you know what? I just gave all of me, I squeezed every bit of juice. If your life's an orange, squeeze every bit of juice. You want to be 90, 100 years old and there's nothing left but pulp because you squeezed every bit of juice out of it. And the biggest superpower that we have, I believe over everything in the world because we can all do it. Whether you got a dollar to your name or 100 million bucks is the gift of reciprocity. Do for others first. Expect nothing in return and watch your life change. That's my message for today. That's my weekly wisdom. If you like this, hit share button right now. Let's get this out. Let's make this a. Let's let this one go viral a little bit. Let's get it in the hands of people that need to see this message. If you like it, hit the like button. I appreciate you all for being here. My weekly wisdoms447. Think how many years I've been doing this every single week. And, you know, the ability to do it on Facebook now and just go live and have you guys here and talk to Tony and Liberio and Paul and Randy and everybody who's here. Phil, it's great to have you here. If you don't have my book, so many of you already do. I was going to give away 10,000 copies. We're already over 115,000 copies. It's unbelievable. It's the greatest gift in the world. Of course I asked you to cover the shipping and handling and you can get the book@deansfreebook.com deansfreebook.com if you don't have it, go grab it. It's truly the best thing I've ever created in my life. I'm so proud of it and I'm proud of you guys for being here. You have an amazing week. Take me up on those lessons. I'm gonna go have breakfast with my kids. Take me up on those two things. One, create reciprocity in your life. Do some amazing things for people today. Expect nothing in return. Secondly, forgive somebody this week. It only does you the good. Alright, take care. Bye.










