What are the Essential Elements to Your Success? (3 Keys)

Sam. Hey, everybody. Thanks for coming to the livecast. This was kind of spur of the moment. You know, I was thinking about you guys. You know, I do obviously the weekly wisdoms every single week, hence weekly wisdom. And I realized I hadn't done a live cast to share with you guys in a while. And I said, let's just do it. I think we decided on Wednesday or Thursday, so I'm not sure. We got a lot of emails out, but I wanted to do it today. Tomorrow I'm traveling to Las Vegas, doing a live event there, Thursday and Friday. So this was my only time I could do it. And I'm so glad you joined. I want to tell you how much I appreciate you for being here tonight. I know we're all busy and we're coming home from work. If you're on the, if you're on the west coast, it's really early. You might not even be home from work yet, but maybe you can catch the replay. And if you're just getting home and you're racing around trying to get dinner ready, get the kids life, all the crazy stuff. Thank you so much for being here. I'm going to do my best to deliver some great wisdom today to really get you inspired, get you in the mood. But inspiration only lasts so long. Motivation only lasts so long. Capabilities that settle in your gut can last a lifetime and get you through the hurdles. Also, thank you so much for all the wonderful comments about my son. Want to give everybody an update? He's totally fine. They think he has the flu. If you watch the video, if you watched this week, this weekly wisdom, my son just kind of hit a wall and it was a little scary and we got him to the hospital. Flu combined with asthma. He's doing great. He's home. He still has a fe. Still not the best, but he's going to be fine. So thank you for all the wonderful wishes that really meant a lot. Okay. One thing I want to also share with you guys, it's heading towards the end of the year. If you want to enter the Send Me away contest, the Send Me Away Dean contest, go to this week's blog. You can get the link underneath it or just go to send me awaydean.com I think that's the URL. And get all the information. Enter to win, send in your video. If you entered in past years, in the last five, six years and didn't win re enter. We want to get these. We want as many videos as we can. The deadline is just over a month away, so get those videos in. Okay, so today I decided I wanted to do a live cast for you, a live video presentation, before I even knew the topic. Because what I typically do is bring things up that are happening in my life, you know, that I live by. If you're not climbing, you're sliding, and I'm always trying to absorb as much knowledge as I possibly can, and I hope I get to you and I hope you've seen it. And if some of you have been with me for years and years, I've been doing these weekly wisdoms for almost five years now. Next month will be five years. Some of you, I know you've been here since the beginning. I hope you've watched me evolve, and I hope I've helped you evolve. Because as I grow, as I learn, I want to share all of it. So I got a couple things that happened to me in the last week or 10 days that I thought were important. I kind of thought through it and I was like, wow, what an important message to share with you guys. And really hit home. And I'm going to get to it in a minute. But I truly believe with all of me that there's nobody even close to us with the wisdom that we deliver to you guys on how to profit from real estate. Whether you got my books, you've gone to our boots on the ground, our live events, you've gone through our success academy, you're in the middle of it, you're thinking of going hands down. This is what I do. I'm doing real estate every single day of my life. I partner with my top students. The knowledge flows through me to my students. So I know our wisdom on profiting from real estate, hands down is the best. I truly believe that with all of me. I truly believe now that the market is rebounding and we're heading back up, there could never be a better time to get involved in real estate. That's why I urge you, if you're thinking of going to a live event, if you're on the edge or considering it or you're considering that education jump in, the market is rising. You want to jump on that wave and ride it all the way to the top. But the reason I work so hard and do my weekly wisdoms is because with me feeling, I don't know if any other trainer, educator would ever say this with me, with all of me believing my education is, hands down, second to none. We have too many successful people from all over the country doing it from every background. I truly believe that 80% 70, 80, 85% of all of what it takes for you to get out there and do your first deal has to do with what goes on between your ears. I believe that with all of me. And I've watched my students who have succeeded, and when you finally get to them and they're on their first deal or their 50th or their 3,000th deal, they will come to me and go, wow, it was in front of me all the time. It was the day this clicked, the day I didn't let this get in my way of my success. So that's why I worked so hard. And that's what I want to talk about today. There was something that really stood out with me in the last 10 days that I wanted to share it with you, and that's what I'm going to do today. Oh, and another thing, for the last couple months, what I've done is I've done these live casts. Half, you know, half hour, 45 minutes for everybody, and then a half hour, 45 minutes for my IE VIP amazing members. And if you're an IE member, thank you for being here tonight. Make sure you use the heck out of the site. Book your life coach, get in there and check out the new information we put in. We've got a lot more information coming. Site is just keeping. It's just going to continually evolve. But today, you know what? I've decided I'm just going to do it. I hope you IE members are okay with it. I'm just. I got a message I want to share and I want to share it to everybody. So we're going to do about an hour and it's going to be for everybody. There'll be no cut. So I hope everybody's excited about that. And again, if you're an IE member, dig in. Book a life coach appointment today. Make it a part of your life, like brushing your teeth. It's there for you. You're a member, you get access to that. And remember, what goes on in here could affect so much of what you do out there in the world. So let me just share what I want to talk about today. Okay, so I'm not name dropping. I guess I am a little bit, but there's a reason for it. So what do Larry Fitzgerald from the Cardinals and Derek Hough, who's from Dancing with the Stars, in the last four years or five years? He's won four. The last five. Five years. I think his sister is Julianna Hough. Anyway, they were both on Dancing with the Stars. If you watch it, you know what I'm talking about. If you don't watch much TV like me, maybe you don't, but maybe between the two of them. So what do these two have in common? Well, last weekend I played 18 holes of golf with Larry Fitzgerald by accident. I was with a good friend of mine, John, a mutual friend. He said, hey, I'm going to play golf. We actually went to my son's tee ball game. Our sons play on the same T ball game. We're at the game. He said, hey, I'm playing 18 holes with Larry Fitzgerald and his dad. It's only the three of us. Would you like to be the fourth person? So I got to spend four and a half hours with Larry, Larry's dad and my good friend John. Derek. Derek and I met at a Tony Robbins event. I hadn't gone to Tony Robbins ever before in my life. Tony and I are great friends. He's a wonderful person. Admire him, love all the stuff he shares. But Tony invited me, him and I to go to lunch. I think I shared this with you guys. And I decided while I was at lunch. I went to Chicago and went to his event. I sat next to Derek Hough. We became friends. We flew back on the plane together, talked for five hours, and now him and I have become friends. Wonderful, wonderful guy. So why am I talking about these two guys? Because both of them are some of the best in the world at what they do. Larry Fitzgerald is considered one of the best receivers of all time. He's considered one of the best right now, one of the most likable. Just an amazing guy, amazing human being. And I'll share more about him in a moment. But he's one of the best in the world. Derek Hough. You might see him on Dancing with the Stars and he's great and he wins there all the time. But. But I'm not sure, you know that he won the world championship of dance when he was just young. I think he was 19 or 20 years old. The world champion. Not like a division. The world champion of dance. Him and a partner won. These guys are winners and they're some of the best in the world. So how does that relate to you? Because there was some common threads, because they were only a week apart, that I hung out with these guys. I was just in California with Derek this weekend. Spent a day and a half together. He did a live event. I went with him. It was good, but we talked a lot. And what I noticed was some common threads. There was a lot of Them. But both of these guys had common threads that I wanted to share with you. And it leads to something I want to talk about down here, which is focus. I kept this for last because that was the part that really just hit me hard and I wanted to share it with you guys. So, first of all, happy for others. So what I really noticed about both of these guys is how genuinely happy they were for people around them, for success. Both of them dug deep on what I do. I teach people how to invest in real estate. It's not the most exciting thing. It's not being one of the best receivers in the NFL or not being one of the best dancers in the history of the world. It's not that exciting. I'm not on TV in the spotlight. I'm more on tv paying for advertising to get people engaged in our program. But both of them were genuinely interested in me. And you know what it did? It made me 10 times more genuinely interested in both of them. To where I would help out either one of them with anything I could. Not because they're celebrities, because they were people who reached out first. So I wanted to make that a lesson for you guys. What does it take for you to be happy for others? Do you know most people's mindset? The majority, not you, or you wouldn't be here right now. But most people's mindset, when their friend or someone they hear does more, does better, evolves. There's an inner jealousy that makes you back away from or resent them. And that's years of programming. From negative media to people around you, to maybe your parents, who you love dearly. Maybe that's how their parents brought them up. I don't know what it is, but we got this innate thing that when someone else is happy or someone else is doing well, if our relationship isn't good, we don't want to talk to the person with a good relationship. If we're not doing good financially. We don't want to be around somebody who's making money. When it's the complete. That's counterintuitive. It's the complete opposite. We want a good relationship. Hang out with somebody who's crushing it at home and having an incredible relationship. We want to make more money. Find somebody who makes you feel horrible because they're doing so good. And all you. I don't mean horrible. Horrible in a way that they're so far ahead of you that all you want to do is strive to be them. You want to play tennis at your best? Find somebody who Whips your butt. That makes you feel bad temporarily, but makes you go back and say, someday I'm going to beat that guy. And I'm sorry, honored that he is so good. He must have worked his tail off to get it. You know, in so many cases, we look at people. I always said this about, I come from a little town in upstate New York. Love my town, love the people, love it, love New York. But in my little town, there's naysayers in every big town. But little town, you just get to know everybody. And I remember saying as I was evolving through my success, the only two things people would say about me is I was dumb for trying. If I tried something that they thought was outside my capabilities, try to be on tv, try to buy too many real estate deals. If it failed, they go, see, guy's trying too much, stepped out of comfort zone, he's a failure. And if it worked, I simply got lucky. There was nothing in between. And that is just a horrible mindset. So lesson number one. Try to be happy for others and be interested in others. Find out what they do. You know, what bonds people the most? Not this, these. When you listen to people and understand them, feel where their hearts are, know where they've been, know where they're going, and all of a sudden you create a bond that people would do anything, literally. I'm helping. I'm going to do my best to help out Larry on some travel stuff that I have a connection for. And Derek, I'm assisting him on helping him with his live events that he wants to branch out and do. And I'd do anything for these guys simply because they were interested in me. Okay, second lesson. They both failed miserably. You know, it's great. I was not only with Larry, I was with Larry's dad. And what a great guy. His father is just this quiet, awesome dude who was a football player as well years back. And they talked about the times that things went completely wrong. And Derek in a different setting. Derek and I got the chance to be on a plane again, and we had lots of time to talk. And they talked about all the times it went wrong and failed miserably or got, you know, hammered by the press and hammered by friends. And friends tell them, stop reaching for the stars, because especially when they failed. Here's the horrible part. When people fail, when your child falls, what do we do? We run to them. If your child's running around happy and screaming, hey, stop being so happy. Stop yelling so much. And that's kind of a negative Right. But when a child falls, what do we do? We run up to the child and hug them and say, are you okay? Well, that really doesn't change in life. So here's the horrible part. We are reinforced to fail. We really are. Because if you like empathy and sympathy and someone caring on you, all you have to do is fail and let people know, and then they support you and tell you they'll be okay. Those same people who are supporting that, they're holding you up and saying, hey, I told you, you stepped out of your boundaries. This happened to me, too. I mean, all these things are my life, too, but I just. It was great to see it in such a tight space with two people who are world champions. Right? So the reinforcement of failure is, hey, you know what? You probably stepped out too far. Here's what I want to tell you right now. If you haven't failed today, if you haven't failed this week, you are not trying hard enough. Fail your butt off. Because failures are the building blocks to your success. You know, Winston Churchill said the definition of success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. Because all they are is your building blocks. Change your mindset. Failure is part of your success. The more you fail, the quicker you fail, the quicker you get to the answer. That works. Now, listen, I don't want you guys to fail miserably. And that's what our education is for. That's why we set things up so failure is minimal. I have failed miserably. Learn from what I do and learn from what I did wrong. You're only getting what works. I've tried a million things that don't. That's not in your education. But you know not to do those. So if you haven't failed lately, you're not trying hard enough. Push harder. Push faster, Push faster. Okay. Felt you're not ready. Both of them. And this is great. You see a world champion, you just think when you see one of these guys or anybody like them, that they're just. Their confidence is always on. They got it. They got it under control. This is what they do. Born with unique ability. They're lucky. It's not that difficult. They complete opposite with every success. I'm talking about these two. And I've been blessed to meet presidents, multiple presidents. I've met billionaires. I've been lucky to meet a lot of people, and I feel honored and blessed. But all of them have a kind of a humbleness of felt they weren't ready and not as good as you perceive them. Okay. I'll give you an example. Derek said he went to England to study, and about four weeks before the World Championship, his coach came to him and said, get ready. In two weeks, you're doing a competition. If you win that and qualify, you're going to the World Championship. And he said, I'm not ready. Four weeks. I'm not ready. He thought he was going the year after, and she said, you're ready for it. He said he pined over it and said, no way. I'm not ready. And she told him. And the cool part is, he had a good mentor. He had someone that became like a second mom to him who told him, yes, you're ready. Yes, you're ready. He went to that event two weeks in, he won that. He qualified for the World Championship. And then he's like, I qualified there, but this is the world. Everybody from the world is coming in. I can't do this. I'm too young. He started going through all these excuses, and then, like all entrepreneurs do it. So I want you to know we all think the same things you do, and all the things that are there are there for everybody. But one difference is overcome your fear and step it up and jump in the game. Because, listen, Wayne Gretzky said, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. He wanted to wait a whole nother year. When he went into the competition, they had him ranked that he would finish fifth through seventh, and he jumped in, he did the performances of his life, and he won the World Championship feeling he wasn't ready completely, didn't want to do it. I mean, think about how his life probably changed forever, forever and ever, because he actually overcame that fear, didn't listen to that demon, those voices inside, tell him he wasn't ready, and he got in the game. And that's another thing. That's just the thing I always share with you guys. You have to be in this to win. To even fail to do it, you've got to be in it. If you stand on the sidelines, you never can score a touchdown, but you get in the game, might drop a fumble in front of you, you could pick up and score. It's about being in over. Preparation is one of the biggest killers to this. Investing in real estate. I see it all the time. The other thing I see all the time, too, is people thinking they have to get their entire life in order before they start. I got to get organized. I got to read all those contracts. I need to finish my training completely and then maybe go through it a second time, I got to straighten out my relationship with my husband or my wife a little better. And once that's better, then I'll. Then I'll have the support and I can do it. We can talk about all the things that could hold us back for the rest of our entire lives or, and I got this from Jen Gray, one of our students. You can jump out of the plane and grow wings on the way down. That's the way to get engaged. That's when you listen, when you think you're not ready. Think of that story of Derek Hough, who became a world championship when he was going to put it off, champion when he was going to put it off for an entire year. Quiet competitiveness. This is the one I like playing with Larry and his dad and being with Derek. And again, I can go back to a whole bunch of other wonderful people that I've met, even having dinner with Michael Jordan and all these great people. And I'm not just name dropping. I just want you to know this common thread that I've seen, and I'll probably write a book on it someday. But the quiet competitiveness was not this cocky arrogance that you would think to come from any world champion, but this kind of humbleness of quiet confidence and quiet competitiveness. What I really liked about both of them is even Larry and his dad were playing Larry and Larry Sr. Larry Jr. Larry Sr. They were playing against each other. And I watched this polite competitiveness come out like he was cheering his dad on for his shots. But he wanted to beat him because Larry just started playing golf about five months ago. His dad's been playing for lots of years, and they're about even right now. And even though he was quiet and polite, he wanted to beat him. The same with Derek. You know, Derek's won over and over again on Dancing with the Stars this year. I asked him about Amber. His partner leg's hurting a little bit. And he's like, you know, he goes, hey, I won it. I'm doing my absolute best. I've learned that if I do my best and don't win, I still am a winner. And I still won. And so did my amazing partners. They win because they gave it their all. That's all that matters. But then, you know, it's an hour down the time. And he started talking about, well, it is getting. And I could see the competitiveness come out. And all of a sudden I could see he wanted to win. So being competitive is okay, I believe. I mean, my son plays T ball they don't keep score yet. I want him to keep scoring next year. I'm just saying I like being competitive, I like being polite. I want the other person to succeed. I want, here's one thing that this is my personal thing. I want other people in my field to step it up and do better because it will always keep me on my toes. I want my competitors to step up their game. When I get frustrated with my competitors, it's because they're slacking, they're teaching five year old strategies, they're hands off, they do an infomercial and let someone else run the education. I hate all that crap. I would love for them to be as good as us. I would love for somebody to get close to me because all I do is get more competitive and get better and better. Competition is great, so create some for yourself. Who can you be competitive with? Can you find a team member on deangradzioc.com can you find a team member on IE as an Insider Elite member, find another VIP member and set something up on who's going to make the most deals, who's going to find a deal, who's going to close a deal, who's going to do a wholesale deal. Get quiet, get competitive, be polite, be quiet about it. Confidence is so much better than cockiness. And that's what I saw in both these guys and really loved it. They do it with a headache. I've talked about this a lot. Of course, poor Larry gets beat up every single week and feels like hell, has to get back up, go to practice and get back in the game. Right, with a headache. Derek told me a story that I thought was great. When he moved to England, this woman that became like a mom to him, he said that she was very every day, if you're going to be a world champion, you got to go every day. And he said he can remember waking up, being sick, not feeling the best. Some days just didn't feel like doing it. And she would say, you know, you have to get it, you have to be in the game, you have to be in it to win it, even if you had a headache. And he said as he was going through it, he thought it was kind of a pain in the ass. And then as he got a little older, he realized by doing it with a headache, he had an edge over everybody else. As he got older in life, things got easier. I mean, he's only in his 20s right now, but he realizes now it was such a gift to learn how to do it with a headache, to not complain. What's wrong. To focus on what's right in the world, to focus on what's going good in his life. And he realized that when you focus and you have this vision, you have this goal and you want to accomplish it, that doing it with a headache is really not that big a deal. Except that people just get used to saying no. And I'm using a headache as a metaphor. When you're tired, don't feel good, in a bad mood, somebody yelled at you. Whatever it is, stop making excuses and start taking action. Do it with a headache. So think about that the next time, whether you want to go to the gym. And you go, well, I'm a little tired today. The heck with it. You're only tired because you're not working out enough. If you got. If you. If you're afraid to call a real estate agent because they're not talking to you in the right way, it's because you haven't called enough real estate agents. Do it with a headache. Stop making excuses. I saw that with both of them and I loved it. They don't take themselves too serious. I kind of like that. It kind of goes along with quiet competitiveness. Being humble is a true asset in my world because in my view, I should say, because it's almost like you don't see them coming, right? They have the ability not to take themselves serious and pat themselves on the back more of just staying focused and clear on what they want out of life. Not doing it to impress other people, doing it because they set goals and know where they want to go. They want to be better next year than last year. They want to keep climbing, not sliding, like I hope to do every day. Like, when I analyze these guys, I know this is sloppy on my whiteboard. I got some stuff here I didn't want to show you yet. I just wrote this a little while ago. But this stuff is in my head and I think about it non stop. These are the things that I look, wow. I like to be all these. And I think I am. I don't want to sit here and say, this is me too. But it is the reason I was so attracted and wanted to talk to these guys. And the reason I'm talking about today is because I'm like, wow, this is the same thing that Richard Branson told me and all these other people. These are common threads. And there's the things that I love to see in my students who evolve. And that's every single one of you watching. There's nobody watching that can't take these attributes and make them a part of your life. You could change just like that. Right. And one of the last ones. And I want to. I'm going to go probably, if we have time, I'm going to go deeper on this one. But fine tune what they're good at. Fine tune their craft. You know, it kind of falls back on so many things I share with working on unique ability. Stop trying to get good at things you stink at. Get amazing at things you're already great at. And this is a prime example, especially an athlete or a dancer. I see so many people that will hesitate to start because they feel like I have to get more organized. I have to get better on the phone. I have to, you know, I have to find more time. I have to. And they'll list all these things that they're not that great at. And once they get good at it, then they can start making offers. And I say, the hell with that. Find what you're good at and get amazing at it. Because what that does is it builds a level of confidence that I can only share with those of you who already know it and those of you who are on their way can experience it. It's like having kids. You don't know how much you could absolutely love a child until you have one. Right? I always tell people when they have a dog they love. And that's your password. And. And you love that dog. You think you love that dog so much. And you have a child and you realize you love your child 100,000 times or a hundred million times more than the dog. Right? It's the same way with understanding how to get great at what you're good at. Because you find this zone, you find this groove, that this thing you're good at produces so much income and results that you forget about the things that you stink at and literally can pay people to do that. I'm horrible at writing. I'm horrible at spelling. Well, I'm really good at real estate. I can do deals to hire somebody to help edit my books after I write them by just doing one deal. I'm good at real estate. Let me do one extra deal. Hire an editor for 10,000 bucks. And that was one flip. And now I got someone who's good at fixing my words and punctuation and putting periods and putting two O's at the end of two instead of one. I don't care about that. I never want to get good at it. If you asked me to hand write an essay of 5, 500 words. I promise you. There'd be so many misspelled words that if you're an English major or you're a teacher, you'd be like, there's no way this guy could be successful. Your book smarts and your success have zero correlation, in my opinion. Now I want my children to go to college. My nephews are in college. They're smart as heck. I didn't. Some of these people I know did. Some successful people didn't. This has nothing to do with bashing college. What I just want to tell you the correlation between lots of education and success have nothing to do with each other. Education, knowledge and action equal success. And we're going to get to that. You know, so many people think that they have to go on for years to get things done. That training should take a long time. And I think we're kind of programmed through school on that. I see it with my daughter. She's seven years old and I'm really good at math. She inherited it. We do all these big math problems. She. She's not going to get to them in school until probably third or fourth grade. She's in first right now. She is so bored with two plus seven. When she can add 1872 plus 14, 25, she can times eight times seven. She can do all the things that third graders do, and she's going to have to wait two years. We're kind of programmed that we go slow. No, total immersion. You want to speak French, go to France for two weeks and put yourself in a village where they don't speak English. You'll be talking French in two weeks, not fluently, but you'll be eating, going to the bathroom and. And saying hi and goodbye. It's the same thing. If you have the opportunity to gain real estate wisdom like you do and so many of you have, go back into it, get totally immersed and go get amazing at what you know you're good at. And if you're not good at it but you love it, that confidence will carry it to fix the other areas. And when you find that groove, like I said, knowing how much you love a child, when you can work in your unique ability, when you can work for you, when you can say, you know what? Maybe I wasted 20, 30 years in a job I wasn't supposed to be in, or maybe there's a job you're in right now that you know in your heart's not supposed to be for you, or you're retired and you want to reinvent yourself, or you're A baby boomer ready to show the world what you should have showed them 30 years ago. I don't know what it is, but when you find what you're good at and you know, maybe you already know what you're good at and you just keep harnessing all your energy on that, you will understand how you could just take that to a whole other level. And that confidence changes everything. It makes you stand up straight, put your head back. No more saying, oh, I'm having one of those days. No, you're having one of those days. That's how it feels to live in your unique ability. And that's what I would wish for every single person watching right now. So how do you do it? Start making a list of the things you hate to do or you stink at and see if there's a way that you could work on the things that you're already good at and slowly start separating the two. So this one starts building the confidence and the income to pay for those things or fix the things you stink at. Okay, last focus. Focus was. I'm going to run over here and grab some water. It's live. So, you know, okay. Focus was something that really hit me. I could see that when they talked about everything, it was fun, confidence. We talked about a lot of things, Personal life, everything. But when they talked about their craft, the focus was laser sharp. Laser sharp. And then I started thinking to myself, wow, that's when I get obsessed on something. My focus is so clear. I know my outcome. I know where I'm going. I don't think I should do this. I know I must do it. And I get this laser focus. And I know you have the same thing on things you've accomplished, from being a good spouse to being a good parent, to the job you're in, to so many of you had already done deals. You had to be focused to do it. But how do we take focus to another level? So I'm thinking about focus, and I literally Google focus. Like, I want to get some perspective on some things that I do and other things do. And I came across my friend Tony Robbins did this short video on focus, and I'm like, wow. I was taking notes prior to watching, and I watched his, like, great combination. So this is a combination of my thoughts and this video I watched of Tony. So I want to talk about three things. I'm going to try to cover these so you don't focus on the next one. Okay, let's talk about three things that are essential to your success. And they were all prompted by seeing the focus in people that are successful. They talk about all this stuff and then they talk about what they're good at or they're a world champion at, and all of a sudden it gets laser sharp. Wow, look at that focus. Like you could feel it, you know, when you're around somebody who's so focused, you feel it in your belly. Okay, so let's talk about focus. Complete focus. Now, this is something that I focused on talking about, focus that I thought about for years. This wasn't something I grabbed from Tony. But I want to share this with you. And this is more on the masculine side, not the feminine side. So, ladies, you're not programmed to think this way. Men are more solution oriented. Am I right? You have a tough day at work or a tough day home with juggling the kids and running all over, and your husband comes home and you want to tell them what happened, and your husband just simply blurts out a solution, right? And maybe, you know, tough day at work with your boss. Your husband goes, oh, why don't you just say this to your boss? Okay, let's go on. Or you just want to talk about it, right? And I'm not trying to put labels on anybody, but that happens a lot. At least it happens in my life. So problem verse, solution focus to me means this. So many people I've known, so many people I've met, so many people that were in my lives or may still be in my life. Family members, people I love dearly. Don't realize that there's two ways to focus on a circumstance. And if the circumstance happens to be an obstacle that you have to get over, some people will spend their time focusing on that problem. And we've all done it. I have too. How many times has something gone on in your life or it started and you need to talk to somebody, or you need to address something, or you need to approach something or change something, and all you do is focus on what's wrong. You focus on the problem. We've all done it. Don't lie. You took the education and all of a sudden you're going, wow, I spent a lot of money. I'm only halfway through. What if it doesn't work? What if I make an offer and it's not accepted? What if I call somebody and they think I'm pathetic and I'm not good? What if all the good deals in my area are gone? These problems, all these problems, all these problems, you know, I'm out. This isn't for me. It's not going to work. All you did is focused on what could go wrong. And coming down here, you are what you focus on. The results you get are absolute direct correlation to what you focus on. What people do wrong in life is they don't realize they're focusing on it, not working, expecting it to work. It just simply does not happen that way. What you focus on is what you get. Write that down. Write it on your hand. Check yourself on a daily basis on what your focus is. Because the problem focused person gets absolutely paralyzed. Because I wrote this in totally fulfilled seven years ago, eight years ago, whenever I wrote that book, I said, there's two kinds of people in life. I made it really simple. Somebody who spills a glass of milk and they say, wow, why did that spill? Whose fault was it? Is it the manufacturer of the cup? Is it uneven? Is the table off? And it spilled all over the rug. Oh, my God, the rug's going to stink. And what are we going to do? We have to call a carpet cleaner. Oh, my God, this is horrible. And they could talk about it on what went wrong and get frustrated on why that milk spilled. We're a solution oriented person. We'll go get a towel and a new glass of milk. Which one are you? Are you worrying about how the milk spilled? I mean, there's people in life that would go so far to say, well, maybe it's the manufacturer's fault. I'm going to write a letter because the cup is crooked and someone's paying for my carpet and it's going to go down. It's going to go into the bedding underneath and it's going to mold and it's going to stink in here. Oh, my God. And I mean, literally, I'm obsessing over the milk. But think how many times you or someone you know have done that in life over the problem rather than just fix it, find a solution. So what I encourage you to do over the next couple weeks is as things come up immediately go to the solution. Is there a way that you could fix this or learn from it? I mean, just think when you focus on solutions, it's either a way to fix it or learn. And both of those are really positive outcomes. Right? It goes back to the both have failed, Both these guys failed. I've failed more than I've succeeded. But I've been fortunate enough to when I fail, I try to work on a solution and I learn from it or I fix it and I get better. So realize that what you focus on and I'm Saying it again is the end result of what you get out of life. Now focus on what you want. Now there's another one you need to. And it sounds almost the same, but it's different. You need to focus on what you want, not what won't happen. So for example, if you say, hey, I'm going to try my first deal and what I want is, I want to find a buyer, I want to find a seller, I want to make a wholesale deal and I want to make five grand. And you start focusing on those steps. This is very subtle, but focus on if something went wrong or while the process is going on. If someone says, oh, the title has issues, you go, oh, this real estate stuff, it's got a title issue. Maybe there's something wrong. Maybe there's lots of money owed on it. Or you could say, hmm, when there's a title issue, what's the first thing to do? Let me Google it. Find a title company. How much does it cost to figure it out and get this resolved? There's two completely different thought processes here. The problem focused person will get paralyzed. The problem focused person will hit one road bump and then they'll be at a Starbucks with a friend or relative or be online one night and go, I tried that Dean Graziosi program. You know, I had this one deal locked up and there was a title issue. This is a bunch of, this is a scam. It doesn't work. While the solution oriented person is sitting there solving problems, getting that deal done, which one do you want to be? You get to decide. So just check your focus on a regular basis. Check your focus. Okay. Make it a must. I talked about that before. When you focused on something, you need a clear, compelling future. It's hard for me to share this without, like jumping through the camera, but when I want something, I have such a clear vision of what that's going to look like when I succeed. I can feel it. I can literally give myself goosebumps, literally. And that took years to do. And I don't do it on purpose, but I start envisioning something. I'm working on a project right now that you guys will have opportunity to see. Probably mid January. I am amped on this. It's the greatest thing I've ever created, the greatest thing that will ever be there for you. It's going to be a product that you guys will be able to use for nothing. But it is the best thing I've ever created in my life. I have already got such a compelling vision of that End result and how my students are going to love it. And if you guys can post, you guys, I know what you're going to say. I know what you're going to feel. I knew that when I created the insiderly, I had a clear vision. I. I was compelled to do it. And nothing was going to make me have problem focus. Every time there was a road bump, all I did was immediately try to figure out how can we solve it, how can we learn from it, how can we fix it? And that just when you train your brain that way, it makes life so different. Now here's the thing. Anybody who likes to think about the issue, if you want to talk about the problem, that's okay because you want to express how you feel. But don't just linger on it. Don't make that part of your life. Talk about it, get it out and immediately go on. How can we fix this? How can we not only fix it, but make it change forever? Okay, that's the first part of the three guys having fun so far. Okay, good. I can't hear you, but I'm hoping yes. Okay, second part. Get the best tools. Now this is one I robbed right from Tony. He was talking about getting the best tools. A map, a mentor, proof of concept. Here's what I want to share with everybody watching. Most every single person watching. I think most of you have been a part, some part of our education. Even if it's just my book or you've gone to a live event or you're considering going to a live event, get your butt there or you've been through Boots on the Ground, been to a buying summit, part of our real estate success academy. Maybe just a member of this site. There are maps, mentors and proof of concept if you're an IE member. If not, get your butt, be a part of the IE member. Be mentored by somebody who's doing it. Find people who show proof of concept. You know, I talk about this all the time. I share this story and if my mom's watching, she won't like this. But I did a TV show one time and I was in this zone of making sure. Make sure you follow people that, that can give you proof of concept. People who have succeeded, get a mentor who's doing it right. I said when I want marriage advice, I don't ask my parents. They've been married a lot. Each time they're watching, they're going to be upset. I said it as a joke to make a real impact. But it's true at the time of my life. My parents had been married a lot. If I want good marriage advice, I'm going to find somebody who's been married for 35 years. They're super happy, and I'm going to learn how they did that. It's the same thing here. Don't listen to your miserable friend. And I don't mean that in a rude way, but you can have a friend that's miserable over money all the time. And you're going to talk to them about making money in real estate or taking a chance on education or stepping out of the norm, coloring outside the lines. No, they're going to reel you back in, make you feel stupid for trying, and you're going to go back to a life that if you loved, you wouldn't be watching me right now. So why not grab a map? Listen, here's what I want to encourage you right this moment. If you've been through our education, go back to it. If you're part of one of our VIP advanced education buyers and members and students, call your coach tomorrow. If you're an insider elite member, book a life coach appointment. Go back and watch one of our live events that were recorded that are inside there. Get the education. Get the roadmap. Learn from somebody who's doing it and see the proof of concept. What you need is leverage. How do you get leverage? By seeing other people taking a step before you who. Who were doing it. You don't find somebody who's done it wrong because they only know how to do it wrong. If you find somebody who bought a house in 2005, right before the peak when everybody thought it was cool to be an investor but with no education, they bought that house. They bought it in.05 for 300 grand, and by 2009, it was worth 100,000 bucks. And you say, hey, I think I can learn for this person because they didn't do it right, and you go, hey, what do you think of real estate? And they go, oh, stop it. It ruined my life. I went into foreclosure. I ruined my credit. And I'm sorry if somebody, somebody watching went through that. It's a horrible experience. But you're here now, so now is your time to make up those losses. But what I'm saying is you can't learn from that person. They only know how to do it wrong. They're only going to discourage you from the path that you can take and the life you can have. So you can't learn from somebody who does it wrong. You got to learn from somebody who is a mentor that is actually doing it. And what I was talking about before, learning doesn't take forever. People think it's even, even going to therapy. I've gone to therapy on and off in my life because I love to learn, expand my brain. I go to therapy when nothing's wrong in my life, and I've gone when things have bugged me about my childhood. But the only thing about therapy, and I love therapists, this is not knocking you, but so many times, it's so slow. It's like molasses running down a hill on a cold day. It's like this little tidbit of change. Man, I want to jump in. I loved going to the Tony Robbins event. It was three days of blowing your mind. Total immersion. Get this thing fixed and let's move on. And that's what I feel about real estate. Stop dabbling. Jump in. The education is in front of you. Jump in, dive in. Absorb it all. You are smart as heck. We can do so much more than we think. Jump in, find a mentor, find a map. Jump out the plane, grow wings on the way down. Get in the game. That's the definition of how my successful students get in this. If you've been sitting on the sidelines and it's just not working for you, you feel like you can't get that first deal. Think about all the stuff I'm sharing with you today. I could sit up here and I could teach you how to find buyers and sellers. That's what I was going to do. I was going to go through wholesaling again today for those that are new, but, man, that's all over the site. The education we have is second to none. Our education. Listen, this is the stuff, the roadmap I provide for you guys. It's not something I dreamed up. It's coming from me doing deals. Over 130 of them in the last six months. Probably much more than that, but I know that number for sure. It's me partnering with Matt Larson and working with Jen Gray and all these Gina Heredes and all these amazing students and Ali and Joe Jerk and all these great students. I get their feedback and I know what they're doing. So I could take all that. This stuff works. The map, the mentor, the proof of concept is there, but I got to give you this stuff. So you jump out the plane, get in the game, take the shot. And if I could do that, then we could work with you along the way. So jump back into the education. And if you're on the fence, thinking about going to one of my live events, or thinking about joining Success Academy, or thinking about getting my book, or thinking about getting involved in IE. On the deengraziosi.com site, there's a little banner on the left side. Jump in. Get the total immersion. Get the education. Get in the game. Okay? But it's got to be from the best. And, well, we are the best. Okay, Last. We're doing pretty good here. I know I'm going fast, but I know everybody's busy, and I want to give you total immersion tonight. Okay? Resolve inner conflicts. Okay, I wrote this down again, but 80% of it is this. I wrote this, this on this board, and I wrote this as my little note. Accept it. Accept the fact that if it's not working for you, I bet with all of me that it's not the education. The stuff we teach is the stuff I do. The stuff we teach is the stuff. So many of my successful students that you see on Dean Graziosi.com every day, posting when you see them, they're using my map. They're using our mentors. They're using stuff that has proof of concept. So in a lot of cases, 80% is you. What goes on between here and it doesn't mean that you're bad, doesn't mean you're wrong, doesn't mean you have to change everything about your life. Remember, I always talk about Kaizen. One little step at a time. Make small, incremental changes, and you'll turn around in six months, and your life will be completely different forever. But you got to take action. And that's why I share all this stuff. That's why I get compassion. That's why I don't need a script. I literally drew this a few minutes ago because this is the stuff that I live by. I need this stuff if I'm going to get better for you, I need this stuff. So that's why I want to deliver it. So 80% is this stuff. And then you got to really think, what's holding you back? What is your inner conflict? If you're not successful right now, if you've been lingering, not getting your first deal done, there is something in your life holding you back. Now, I. I know you might say no. Dean. I'm in an area where it's really booming, so are a lot of my students. I'm in a small town, so are a lot of my students. I'm in a big town, so are a lot of my students. I don't have money so many of my students with no money made money. I don't have a lot of time. Nobody's got time. It's 2013. Nobody has time. So what's your inner conflict? I don't know. I wrote a couple. Is it past failures? Have you failed in the past and you don't want to feel that pain again? People do that with relationships. Boom. That relationship hurt. I'm never going to fall in love again. That hurt. Is it a past failure? Is it your parents philosophies? Maybe your grandparents were part of the depression. They passed that on to your parents and they taught you the only way to success is safety. Get a government job, get a good job, get an ira. Don't try your own thing. That'll hurt when you fall. It'll hurt really bad. Your parents don't want you to fall. What did your parents do when you fell? When you were a little kid, they picked you up, hugged you and loved you. They're your parents. What do you do with your kids? You pick them up, you love them. Your parents don't want you to get hurt. So they're going to of course put their philosophies on you if they think job is safety because outside that there's no safety net. But is that true in today's world? Not really. So many people I've talked to, when they first started, thought that being successful and wealthy was anti spiritual. It was against what their beliefs were really. I can't buy into that notion. I can't. I think people the love of money who are obsessed with just money and greed, of course, but money can do so many good things. Remember I always say, and it wasn't from me, it was from Dan Sullivan from Strategic Coach that I go to, he said if you can cut a check for a problem, you don't have that problem. If you can help people by cutting a check because you fine tune your unique ability and you know how to make great money and you can cut a check for someone in need. You know, last two weeks ago we went up to Oklahoma and we gave $20,000 to a couple families who lost. Do you know how amazing that felt to be able to deliver that and cut that check to people who had no hope? The insurance companies were taking too long. They're displaced, they're bouncing around from home to home. Is that evil is making sure my kids are secure? Evil? Retiring? My parents who both worked hard their whole life, blue collar parents with no money and I get to take care of them. My mom's dream Was to have a motorhome her whole life. Literally. She came out two weeks ago. Her whole life. She just, her and her husband. She's happy. She's with her high school sweetheart right now and she's going to be 70 and he's in his 70s and he's not, you know, he's not feeling the best. They came out here and all they talked about was their dream is someday they're going to get a motor home and go around the. Go around the country, man. They left. I started thinking about it. Thinking about it, I'm like, what the hell would someday I can cut a check for that problem. By the time they left and flew home, I bought them a 2012, 30 foot Vista motorhome, amazing motorhome. I felt blessed to be able to do it. I'm not bragging, but I cut a check for that problem. When they got home, it was waiting for them. And right now, this weekend or the weekend just passed, they went away and had the time of their lives. It has started. Why wait till tomorrow? Because I could cut a check for that problem. Forget these old philosophies. You got to find out what the conflict is and you have to kill it. You have to kill the conflict that's holding you back. I don't know, dig into your past. Find out why every time you get close, you stop. Do you feel that if you make money, it's being greedy and you're taking it away from somebody else? No. You're creating value for the world. If you make money, you get your lawn done, you get your house cleaned, you go to dinner more, you buy more clothes. You're helping the economy, you're helping people around you. It's your obligation to get wealthy. You want to help this country get wealthy because you'll spend it and you'll help other people. Listen, I know this. If I didn't have an ability to make money, I. I know I would spend lots of my personal time doing anything I could to help others because I truly enjoy it. But what I realized, my gift that I'm blessed with is I know how to do real estate. I know how to educate and I know how to make money. I'm going to work in my unique ability and then I can cut checks to help other people. And I don't mean that I'm just cutting a check. I care, I have empathy. I want to know the story. But I can do a lot better good cutting 20,000 bucks to a family in Oklahoma than going up there and personally maybe help Them clean out a garage. I that's what I've discovered is my unique ability. What's yours and what conflict in your life is holding you back because you got to kill it. And how do you kill it? Dig in deep, find what it is and attach more pain to letting that stop you. There's a lot of different ways about it. I could go in for hours on how you kill a conflict, but one way that I think is attach pain to staying. Attach pain to letting your past failures hold hold you back. Attach pain to thinking these negative beliefs that were implanted into your brain at some point in your life. If those negative beliefs are holding you back on your parents or relatives or teachers philosophies, you have to attach pain to staying with that belief system because that belief system is going to hold your butt right where you are for the rest of your life. And he wouldn't be watching me if you didn't want something different. Anti spiritual. I don't think so. If you were given the gift to be able to step outside the box, overcome all this stuff, have the ability to risk failure and getting made fun of and people telling you you can't do it. Cutting checks for education. So many of you cut checks for the education. You overcame all these things and you stepped outside to make it happen. You start making money and you start paying off bills so you could focus on you and your soul. You could start tithing to your church, helping people, helping your neighbors, helping people across the country that get hit by Hurricane Sandy like we were able to do. I don't know what it is, but get those thoughts out of your mind. Kill whatever this inner conflict is, guys. Because once you kill it and you attach more pleasure to the opposite, there's going to be no stopping you. So think of these three things. Complete laser focus with a compelling future involved. Get the tools. Most of you have the tools. Most of you have the tools. You've already been through it. Re engage the education that you have. Jump in, get my book. Today you can get one of my books, I think for 14 bucks cheaper. I think if you get the download. I'm not even sure. Sorry, I don't know. On Dean graziosi.com become an IE member, go back and call your coach if you're one of our members. Get to a live event, stay on this site if you don't have a dollar in your name. Listen to every webcast we've ever done. Listen to all the conference calls. Get the education and get out there. Jump out of a Plane and get going. Grow wings on the way down. All right, guys, I take a sip of water. That was a lot of talking without stopping, wasn't it? I love these live casts. I love to be able to come and share what's in my heart. What I'm thinking, what I know can make an impact on your life. Dig into the education again. Before I came on today, I was deciding if I should talk about finding buyers and sellers again or talk about this. And when I go to the heart of me, I know that this number is truer than true. 80% of what's going to stop you has nothing to do with the education. Most of you have the education at your fingertips. Most of you have the opportunity right in front of you. Most of you are living in an area that works. I think every area works. I can't even think of an area. If you live in California, wholesale in your backyard, buy and hold in the Midwest. If you live in the Midwest, wholesale, buy, fix and flip. Do what I mean, literally, we have students in every part of the country who are successful. We have students from all walks of life who are successful. We have students who have amazing jobs and money and students that were broker than broke with 30 bucks in their bank account doing well. So the proof of concept is there, guys. And I think if you want, we're going to send this out as a replay as well. So if you're watching it as a replay, wonderful. If you're watching it live, watch it again, take notes, hit pause, put these, implement these things into your life and get out there and use this education. Listen, we have a window of opportunity. It's still there. It's not closing immediately, but the market was way up here in 05. It dropped all the way down here in 2010 and we are on our way up. No matter where you are, it's moving. If you're in some of the hot states, it's moving faster. If you're in a slow state, it's moving slow, but it's moving. This is the time to jump in. Whether you're wholesaling, buy, fix and flip or buy and hold, get your strategy down, get your outcome, get your goals, get in the game and make it happen. All right, everybody, I appreciate you. Don't forget, send in your videos for the Send me away Dean contest. Make sure go to dean graziosi.com if you want or go to send me awaydean.com but you can watch last week's blog and the links are below to the send me away contest. Register for Dean graziosi.com if you want to check out IE Insider Elite, there's a little banner on the right side, halfway down. Click on that. Check that out. But today I just wanted to deliver. Thank you, my IE family members. Thank you for allowing me to just spend the whole time with everybody. I thought this message was so needed for everybody. I didn't want to restrict anybody from having it. So I appreciate you guys. If you're an IE member, please, please, please watch the daily wisdoms. Make a life coach appointment. Click on some of the education you have access to. So much of it. Tens of thousands of dollars of education. Get in there and click on it again. If you're getting ready to go to a live event, go there. Engage, and don't let the world stop you from being the best you. If you've been through education, dig back in. If you're just thinking about it, make it happen. Thanks, everybody, and I'll talk to you real soon.