Dean Graziosi (Millionaire Success Habits podcast) argues that failure to reach desired income, relationships, or health often stems from dwelling on past problems and assigning blame rather than immediately seeking solutions. He contrasts victim-focused backward-looking thinking with solution-based thinking, gives examples (bad relationships, financial betrayals, parenting tactics, spilled milk), and offers practical steps (write five solutions, set reminders, reframe problems as R&D). The episode emphasizes training the mind to focus on fixes and learning from mistakes as the foundation for sustained success.
Chapters
Whose fault is it that you're not living the life you desire or making the money that you deserve? With all the opportunities that exist today, why haven't you reached your next level of income, life and wealth? In most cases, we've been lied to. We've been told that if you find the right opportunity and you work hard, you can be successful. And that's simply not true. Millionaires, billionaires and successful people have realized you need the foundation for wealth, the habits. And that's exactly what you'll be learning on the Millionaire Success Habits podcast. All success starts here. If you've read anything on personal development, personal growth, spent time on your own development, your own success, your habits, you're here at the Millionaire Success Habits podcast. So I would assume this is the first thing you've ever heard. I would bet to say that you know that solution based thinking isn't something that can help you go to your next level of life. It's a must. But have you programmed yourself to actually immediately think of solutions? If not, I'm going to encourage you today to revisit this. See, there's so many people in life that let's just take relationships. They had a bad relationship five years ago, someone cheated on them, and then all of a sudden they keep looking back at that pain of like, why would someone do that to me? I didn't deserve that. That person is so horrible. They've ruined me. They, they took away my trust. And you see that one thing, that energy going backwards on whose fault it is, why did it happen? You know, you probably didn't deserve it. Of course you didn't deserve it. But there's so much energy going backwards that it's stopping that person from a new relationship. Same when it goes to money. If you've ever had a partner that took advantage of you, or someone that said they were going to give you money to start your new business, or a friend that was going to be a co worker or a co partner with you and they screwed you over, you went through a bankruptcy or you tried a way to make money and it stung. If you're looking backwards on that, then it's absolutely, positively affecting your present. So your past is being dragged into your future because when things went wrong, you didn't focus on a solution, you focused on why it happened to you. In most cases you didn't deserve it. In probably every case, you didn't deserve it. You didn't deserve the opportunity not to work, the relationship to go bad, the partner not to come through. You didn't deserve any of it, but it happened. And here's what I know about successful people. They have changed the way they think. You see, your past is there for research and development problems. We've talked about this before. Problems will always happen. The level of your problems really dictates the level of your life. So without problems, you don't really have a life. Without problems, you're not playing the game of life big enough. You're playing small. And if you wanted a small life, you surely wouldn't be watching me or listening to me. So I want you to think about this in a way that maybe you never have before today. I want you to think about how you can change the way you think that when something goes wrong, you immediately focus on how you can fix it. You immediately put all of your energy. Because here's what I know. When something goes wrong, when someone does, you, you know, doesn't do the right thing when the deal doesn't go through. Man, we could spend so much energy, effort, time, money, figuring out why and who. It's why there's so many lawsuits. That's why there's fist fights, that's why there's revenge. None of that ever fixes anything. You know, who makes it through, the people that go, it happened. What can I learn from it? And how do I immediately take all that energy and focus on fixing it when stuff goes sideways with my kids? And I learned this ages ago from, from interviewing parents that were doing a great job and reading books is when stuff goes sideways. You can yell at your kids. You can tell them that they're taking away their PS4, you're taking away their iPad, and all those things could work. Or I could sit down with my kids and this works 100% of the time. I could sit down with my kids and say, that behavior or that action didn't work. I can't undo it. We can't go back and unbreak it. We can't go back and undo it. But I want you to sit right now and write down five solutions that can make it so it never happens again, or five solutions that you won't be tempted, or five solutions to make it better. And when my kids write down the solutions, it immediately changes for life. I can yell at them, I can ground them. I could tell them they'll never do it again. They're going to do. They're not going to see their friends. That just makes them mad at me. And it really doesn't anchor it in. When I say, how do we change that and come up with solutions, all of a sudden, their thinking is different. They're like, huh? I could go a different way, huh? I mean, when I say to my son, hey, you can only do a half hour of day of digital in the house. And he's really upset. I'm like, but let's sit down and write five other alternatives. He's like, well, dad, I really want my iPad. All right? I could get into Legos again. Great Legos solution. Immediately I go outside, play baseball and pitch. Great solution. I can play basketball solution. I can go see the neighbor solution. All of a sudden now when he wants to pay his iPad or do electronics, the time's up. Instead of just getting mad and grumpy, he's got other solutions. Same thing. This old analogy, it's been played out. But if you spill a glass of milk, you can really obsess on whose fault it is, why it's spelt, why it's spilled, how it's gonna. How it's gonna, you know, smell all those things. Or you can get a towel, clean it up, and get a new glass of milk. Where in your life are you looking backwards? Where in your life are you still the victim? And you could have been the victim, but is it helping you? Where in your life are you stalled? Is it money? Is it relationships? Is it your health? Where in your life are you looking backwards? Where you can flip it right now and just start saying, how do I fix it? How do I focus on a better outcome? How do I learn from those mistakes? Revamp, retool what I was doing and move on. You might have some shit lingering from 10 years ago that you need to just focus on solutions today, but this podcast is for something different. Yes, fix the old stuff, clean it up, but I want you to start programming your mind, framing everything in your mind. Start looking. Something goes wrong immediately, go, no, I'm not going to go, how do I fix it? What are some solutions? Solution? Focused thinking is how successful people get that way. Winston Churchill said the definition of success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. We're going to fail. Stuff's going to go sideways. But those who make it, those that excel, are the ones, and I've used this term before, paying success tax by focusing on the solutions, by learning from their mistakes, by having their mistakes be the building blocks to their success, not the anchor holding you down. So that's my quick message for today's podcast, solution based thinking. Write it down in your phone. Write it down. Alarm clock, you know, set an alarm three times a day on your phone. And when it pops up, write solution based thinking. Write it and stick it on a sticky in your car, put it on the refrigerator, put it on your, on your desktop. Whatever you have to do, start training your brain. I know that I will go months with a solution based thinking mindset and life is just easier. I'm just killing it. Whatever goes wrong, like, I got that, oh, we can fix it this way. And then sometimes I'll get in a funk and I'll spend a week just like, why is life so hard? Why'd this happen to me? It's because I realize that when stuff's going wrong, I'm blaming people. I'm blaming something that works for me. I'm blaming, you know, co workers or employees of mine, or I'm blaming my kids or whoever. And like, oh my God, how did I fall victim of that? I think our brain wants to go in that direction. We need to switch it. We need to stop thinking of why it happened, whose fault it is, and be immediately to the solution. Put your energy towards that and watch how fast you grow. Listen, if you like the video, make sure you click subscribe right now so you never miss an episode. And while you're there, click the notification bell so you'll know when the next one goes live. You can always follow us on Instagram. And if you don't already have millionaire success habits, you can grab it for free@deansfreebook.com Remember, all success starts here.
