You're Stopping Your Own Success | How to Stop Self-Sabotage

What the heck does Samskara mean if I'm even saying the word right? And why does it apply to you? Hey, it's Dean Graziosi. Welcome back to the Own youn Future Podcast. Behind the Scenes edition. In under 10 minutes. We try to recap or share some things that weren't covered in the previous podcast. And if you didn't see it, you must with Cody Sanchez. Oh, my God, it was pure fire. First time I met this Incredible woman at 36, what she's accomplished, what she's overcome, the beliefs she has. It is an absolute powerful addition to the Own youn Future podcast. And if you ever thought of buying a company, you're going to want to watch it. If you never thought about buying a company, not even on your radar, you definitely need to see it because it's going to stretch your mind. And just the entrepreneurial journey has been so magical. So why did I bring up the word Samskara? Well, I'm geeking out on a little Michael Singer, A Tethered Soul. If you never read that, it's probably one that should be on your list. I'm reading Life Untethered and he talks about a Samskara. And why am I bringing that up with the behind the scenes of Cody Sanchez? Because towards the end, picture Cody, you'll see this. She started as a journalist. She evolved into finance, did really well, worked for some of the top financial companies, helped them buy businesses and decided, hey, they're doing big buys, multimillion, a hundred million. What if I just bought tiny little businesses that were boring, under the radar? She bought her first one, was a Laundromat and worked her way up. She now owns 25 companies. Then she evolved to say, hey, I've learned all this cool stuff. Why don't I share it with other people? Same business I'm in. Tony Robbins is In now, Matthew McConaughey's in, and so many others. One of the fastest growing industries in the world. Sharing what you know, impacting others, creating success. Okay. She said, even though I give people all the strategies to model this, I find out that they're scared or they don't believe in themselves. How do I get them to push forward? And isn't that the thing? Isn't that why you're listening to a podcast like this? It's why I'm doing a podcast that's like this. It's why I listen to books and courses and tapes and involved in masterminds and coaching programs, because we all need that thing that evokes an emotion strong enough to overcome the old beliefs that we have. The old stories that we have. The imposter syndrome, the self doubt. I'm not good enough. What if I fail? What if I look silly? I'm afraid of starting small. I'm too old. I'm too young. We all have that. So what does Samskara mean? Past beliefs that are imprinted in your psychology. It's imprinted in your life. And it's almost like a rub. It's like it's the cut that whenever you get close to it, it starts. Somebody's picking at it or. Right. It's the relationship you went through and you got burned so bad that there is a negative association to relationships. And you don't realize why you're sabotaging every relationship in the future. You don't. It's the. The business your parents started when you were 13 years old and they went bankrupt. And how to sell your most favorite childhood home and you had to move and leave your friends. And now you're trying to start a business and you don't know why. Every time you get close, oh, you get this feeling and you just don't push through. You want to make more money. But some time in your childhood you were taught that money is evil. So you want more money to have more freedom. Maybe you want to give it all away, but something's holding you back from doing the thing that'll actually bring the money in. And you don't feel like you're a crazy person. And that's what Michael Singer shared in the as a Samskara. And they're deep and we all have them. So I figured since that was one of her big questions as she evolves into the self education industry, how to help people, maybe I could share with you some of the things I've learned here in the next three to four minutes that can help adjust that Samskara. How Michael Singer puts it is when it hits that block, when, when that thing, that, that divorce, that bankruptcy, that being made fun of, when something hits that you freeze and you lock up and we usually hold it internally. And that's where stress comes from and anxiety comes from and worry comes from. And you know, Michael's been meditating for a long time. If you ever read his books, you'll see finding a way to just let that pass through you. It sounds so magical, it sounds so elegant and it's so difficult at the same time. When you're in it and you're reading or you're. And the moment you hear it, you can do it. But then a week, two weeks, a month later, and that thing that triggers you, makes you paralyzed, makes you freeze, makes you play small. Don't go for the relationship. Don't start the business. Don't try to scale. I'm not good enough. I shouldn't be in this room. I'm not, you know, the imposter syndrome. So I wanted to give you a little hack today to maybe help with that. And I don't want to oversimplify it, but I want to simply say this. That Samskara, let's just call it that old thing, that belief that happened to you in the past is reliving over and over again in your thoughts, in your mind, and it's already cost you way too much. It's already stopped you from the level of income that you want, the level of certainty that you want, the level of awareness, the level of credibility, the level of freedom, the level of control of your calendar. You becoming the man or woman you're supposed to be is literally being held back by something that happened in your life, in the past. And your psychology, the way it's framed in your mind is every time it triggers it, it's sensitive like that cut, and it hurts, and you get small, and you don't realize. You go away from it. Your confidence goes down. So I guess the fastest way, the slow way, is probably great meditation. Some of you are listening and meditate and understand this better than I do. I'm a seventh grader in this area. But I love learning, and I love growing. And I love to say, me, too. I get it. And where I've been able to get around that or help me is when I feel that. And this is, as I'm reading it with Michael, I'm like, you have a better solution me to how I did it? When I feel that hesitation, when I feel that resistance, when I feel myself shutting down, when I feel like an imposter, when I feel scared, I recognize it. The first thing is just recognizing this emotion is happening. And I go, why the hell am I feeling this way? And I search through, like my. My mind's Rolodex of oh, because that's how my dad treated me. That's what my dad said would happen. Or this is what happened here. And then I just asked myself this question. If I continue to think in this way and I continue to act in this way, will I achieve what I must achieve? Will I become the man I'm meant to become? Or will this hold me back and if it's this will hold me back. This will stop me. I know I must move forward. I know I must shift that story. I must tell myself that that's a lie. And then I'll find how it's a lie. I'll find someone who had dyslexia and still was achieved so can't be the dyslexia. I find someone's broke like I was and still did great. I'll find somebody who didn't go to college like I didn't and still did well. I'll find someone who went through divorce but then found pure love and created an amazing relationship forever. I will find the proof that this crappy ass story from that Samskara that has held me back is not true. It can only hurt me in the future. I will prove it wrong and I will do it anyway. I want to share something in under 10 minutes that has helped me. There is a lot more work to do on this human condition, but if you're ready to take your business to the next level, Heck, if you're ready to finally start the damn business, there are going to be things that trip you up, that make you think you can't. And you will waste a year. You will waste 10 years. One thing Cody said is she just wish she started sooner. All of us should have started five years ago. That's the best time to plant that tree. Five years ago. The second best time to plant the tree. Or to start today right now if you like this episode. Or you go and listen to the Cody Sanchez episode. If you didn't and you must, then subscribe. Share it. Tell someone you know they should take a listen. Thank you for making this one of the top podcasts on the planet. I appreciate you so much. I'll see you next week. Got a great interview coming up, so don't miss it.