4 Ideas to For More Enjoyment: Infuse Your Days with More Enjoyment and Less Regret

Most people spend their entire life stressed without ever giving a single thought as to what it is they really want or what's important to them. See, I'm here to cut through all that noise, connecting you to yourself and the life that you were meant to live. I used to slave away at a corporate job that I hated, but I broke through the social norms and pursued my passion. As a result, I own my own coffee company. I'm espresso sommelier, and I get to travel the world. You, too, can live a life that you love, but it starts with getting clear about what you want. It starts with a new decision. I'm your host, Donnie Rouse, and you are listening to the podcast One Life. What's going on, everybody? Donnie Rouse here, and I hope you are having an amazing start to your day. So this. This episode was on my morning walk, and as I was walking, listening to some audio to shift my shift and shape my mindset for the day, I thought of what I wanted to share here today. And what I wanted to share was four ideas on how to get more enjoyment out of life. And so I'll just go right into it. And this is reflecting on it. When I think of the parts of my life where I was, like, the most happy, as well as where I felt like I was moving forward, these things were present. So let's start with number one. So the number one is, and this should come as no surprise, is passionate pursuits. Let me ask you a question. What are you doing that you are really passionate about? Like, how are you infusing passion not just in your day, but into your weeks, your months, your years in your life? When we're pursuing things we're passionate about, we're more engaged. We have a wider sense of emotions. We feel more happy because we're doing things that we love. One of the quotes from Steve Jobs that always stuck out in my mind, he said, pursue your passion. Because in my career, people would say, you know, don't pursue your passion. Because by pursuing your passion, you know, you're gonna make it feel like work and you're gonna hate it. And when I remember hearing this, this quote from Steve Jobs, something that really stuck with me that he said is, like, pursue your passion when you're passionate about something, that when it gets tough, when it gets hard, and you know it will, you will stick through it because you have the passion, because you will stick with it when other people are giving up. And to think about it, to kind of reflect on it, on my own life, coffee has been my passion. For me, for my entire life. I chose to make that transition over to coffee from my corporate job early on in my career. And thankfully I did that. And it's not to say that it was easy. I mean, I love coffee. But this has been the journey that I'm currently on, has been one of the hardest journeys that I've ever experienced because it's forcing me. Like if you have your own business, it's like a child and it forces you to grow. Not only that, is there's been so many times, even just in learning coffee itself, where I've been so perplexed because maybe a shot of espresso wasn't coming out the way I wanted wanted or a roast of coffee. And while I was super frustrated, if I hadn't had the passion, I would have given up a long time ago. But because I have the passion, because I have this vision for what I want my coffee to be like and how I want to experience it, how I want other people to experience keeps me going. And all of a sudden I start to make new distinctions. Because when I'm looking at what is a perceived so called problem, now all of a sudden I'm getting new distinctions, I'm learning and now it enhances my knowledge and my expertise. But all that, I wouldn't be able to do that without passion. And so I challenge you for idea number one is to just engage in something that you're passionate about. I'm not saying that you have to, you know, you quit your job and just pursue your passion. Although if you want to do that, I highly, I encourage it, I give you my endorsement, but rather just do things for the sake of passion. Meaning if you like gardening, go out in your garden, make it at least a point to do it one time a week to get out into that garden and just start tilling the soil. Or maybe you like to cook, but you don't really think you're that good at it. So therefore you just kind of, you shy away from it, but you know that it just brings you joy. Go cook, go make a new dish. Because as a result of doing that, it's going to compound, it's going to bleed into every other aspect of your life. Let's go to point number two. Adventure. This is one of my favorite, my favorite, favorite, favorite ideas around living a life of enjoyment. Because we all want a little bit adventure, right? We all want some novelty in our life. Think of the opposite. If you don't have any novelty, where things are just going the same thing every single Day you feel like you're going to go crazy. And maybe a lot of you were there. I know from my own experience that sometimes I feel that life is just on replay. Even when I'm doing, you know, when I'm focusing on a project or I'm doing work, I'm just like, oh, my God. I feel. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to go insane because it's just the mundaneness of the repeating of days of tasks. I feel this sometimes in the summer, and I say it sometimes because, well, let me go into why I feel in the summer. So in the summer, when I'm running my business, I'm always doing the same thing. Like my weeks are on repeat, where it's deliveries, production, and it just keeps going, going, going. And sometimes I'm like, I cannot wait until I get the break. But the reason why I said sometimes is because there are those moments where I step out, right? And I have to always be very conscious of it because I have the. I could fall into the habit of not stepping out and just keep riding that same train. And as a result, I experience the same emotions. But when I step out, when I do things that add a little bit of spice to my life, maybe it's an adventure. Maybe it's hanging out with a new person. Maybe it is taking a side trip. Maybe it is going for a hike to a place I've never been. All of a sudden it makes it colors my picture where the thing was black and white, now all of a sudden there's colors, there's some vibrancy to it. And as a result, I'm enjoying that process more. So when I think, when I tell you about adventure, I mean, adventure. Adventure could be something big, right? If you want to book that trip, go book that trip. I promise you it will change your life. I actually was, when I wanted to say adventure was going to be my first point because that's one of my favorite for enjoying life. It's one of my favorite tools in my tool belt. So let's go back to the travel part as book that trip. Like, what is it that you're really looking forward to? What is it that would add just some spice and aliveness to your life? Let's add that into our day. Maybe, like I said, maybe it is booking that big trip to somewhere overseas, but maybe it's not right. Maybe that's not your cup of coffee. Maybe an adventure for you is just moving to or going to a different state. Maybe an adventure to you is trying a different Restaurant. I used to make the mistake of thinking that everyone was like me in the sense that, you know, everyone wants to travel, right? Everyone wants to travel around the world, visit different countries, go hosteling, and it's not the case. I remember talking to some people, they're like, that sounds like the worst thing ever. But for me, I love it. So what is it to you? Like, what would an amazing adventure look, feel or even taste like to you? And I encourage you just to go out and just start putting yourself in the unknown. Because the reason why, if you feel like you're in a rut, if you feel like life is mundane, is just one repeating day after the other, it's because you're not adding any variety. You're staying with what you know and what you're predicting. As a result, it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Now loop. So you got to step outside of that loop. And as a result of stepping outside of it, you're going to feel more aliveness. Yes, it could be scary, right? Just by experiencing something new, there's unknown, right? You're like, oh, what if something. I promise you there's very little that's going to happen that's going to put you in danger. You look at people you may meet, you may be fearful of being judged or trying something new and being fearful of not doing correctly or failing at it. These are all just lies. So I encourage you to put some adventure into your life and just get out there and see how it just shapes your day, your week and how you feel. Let's go to idea number three. Let's talk about your relationships. This one point is probably the most important out of, out of all of them. Why put it number three? I don't know. I guess it's kind of, I think I'm going kind of not really of importance. The last point is going to be very important too. But this one is probably the most important because none of us do it alone, right? If you're alone, what satisfaction would you get if you were going after all these great things, but there was no one there to experience it with? I know from my own perspective, like I wouldn't enjoy it at all. One of the reasons why I go out and I travel the world, or even my passion for coffee, like, why do I do that? Yes, I like having my coffee alone, but why do I do it in the first place? I do it because I want to impact other people. I travel because I know that on that journey that I meet people and experiences and the people I meet are so raw and that I feel this connection that is deeper than sometimes the relationships that I've had at home for decades. And it's because there's a part of me that I'm bringing out, I'm allowing out into the world. And so those people, if I were to take them out of that experience, like, my top experiences are a lot of my trips. And when I look back and reflect on it, why was it I could be like, oh, well, yeah, you know, going to the top of Machu Picchu. And it was one of my most memorable trips. Going to Peru, man, I loved it. But when I think of, like, what were the real reasons? Like, why did I enjoy. I met some amazing people, especially these two Irish guys who were friggin. They were a hoot. They were. They were so awesome, Neil. And I'm trying to remember the other guy's name, but they were amazing. They made. They were one of the reasons why I enjoyed it so much, because they were just so carefree, welcoming and funny. But. And then, I mean, any other trip I can remember, it's always been because of the people I've met, right? I've had some great experiences, but if I didn't meet and share those experiences with other people, then it wouldn't have been the same trip. So the better your relationships, the happier you're going to be. And I'll leave you with one more story about this. My friend Andrea. Andrea, if you're watching this, I'll give you a shout out there. How you doing? He came to visit the United States with his girlfriend and we went out to a bar in Stanford. We were all together, my, me, a couple of my siblings, and then him. And with a few of his friends were all like, mutual friends. And he was asking, he asked my brother, he's hey, how often do you guys do this? And his friend said, like, I haven't seen Phil, who's my brother. He's like, I haven't seen him in years, I think since his wedding. And my friend Andrea looked at, he's like. He was like, that blows my mind. He's like, how you're good friends but yet you haven't seen him in years. And he was contrasting that with his life back at home in Italy. And one of the things I love about my friends in Italy is that they constantly make time to nurture their relationships. And he was saying, like, I see my friends multiple times a week. I couldn't imagine seeing them once a. Like once a week or even like once every few years. And it got me thinking to. When I was in Italy, I met some of my good friends, like my friend Gianluca. And I loved the fact that, like, there was this camaraderie and this, like, playfulness in the friendships because they always made it a point to get together. Even sometimes I would call him and he would just be getting out of the cafe at like, I don't even, like, 12:00am or something like that. And like, hey, what are you doing? He's like, well, I'm gonna go out, meet my friends for a drink. I'm like, that's freaking awesome. Right? Like, normally, if I. If I'm working all day and I'm like, you know, I'm tired. I'm not doing anything. But they made it a point to go out there. And there is a reason why they have such close relationship is because they invest in the time in those. So I want the. The reason why I tell you this is one just to not downplay how important relationships are in your life, because it's so easy to get caught in the achievement of things. And when I say it's so easy, I'm telling you, I'm talking about my own life. Right. But I think that you're kind of a mirror to me in some regards, so you can relate. It's so easy to get caught in the striving for goals that you remember that you don't remember the things that really matter most and are really going to move the needle, and those are your relationships. So get out there, schedule some time with the people you care about most and just be curious. Learn something about them. Right. See how they're doing. Be vulnerable. Share the top three. Share the bottom three. I'll just give you a little strategy before I go to the last point. When I was in this coaching group with one of my coaches, she said, you're not going to share all of. You're not going to share your most vulnerable points with everybody. But the people in this coaching program that I was in, they're like, you know, these are your people. You can show up here without any judgment. So tell you know, what's going great in your life as well as the bottom 30% of what's not going great in your life. And I remember being on calls and sharing these things with people. And as a result of sharing this, you just felt so much more connected because you felt like you were actually really dealing with people, right? When they were sharing. Like, maybe someone was going through a hardship because they had aging parents and they were Going through all these health things and that they're how they were nervous and fearful and afraid. All of a sudden your heart went out to them and you just felt like they were real people. How often do you do that with your, the people in your life, Your friends, your family, like your close friends and family. I'm willing to bet that you're like a lot of the people in your life, even the closest people, they probably don't know a fraction like a tenth of a percent of what is really going on in your life. And it might feel like protection, like, oh, they wouldn't understand. But what you're really doing is you're isolating yourself. So to finish this point on personal relationships is just to put yourself out there to share, to be vulnerable to the right people, not everybody to the right people, because they will help lift you up. They will. You will feel understood and it will energize your life to keep on going. And you'll feel more joy because you feel connected to somebody. And the last point, the last point of this is. Drumroll, please. Personal growth, right? It is probably not one you expected for number one, right? Personal growth. How does growing more make me feel? More alive and more enjoyment. It does. And I'll give you kind of, I'll give you a story for it. So when I think of the moments that I appreciate, some of the moments that I appreciate or I'm most proud of in my life, they are the moments where I stretched myself to grow. And some of those moments include when I was in college, I nearly failed out of school. I was so close to failing out of school. And then I did a complete 180. I got, you know, I was like, oh my God, if I fail out of school, then I'm not going to be able to get into business school. I'm not going to be able to have a career in finance. Little did I know, never end up in finance anyways. And all of a sudden did a complete 180. I studied my butt off, right? And I pushed myself to grow as a result of feeling of that push, of having a vision that I was moving towards. All of a sudden I felt a lot better about myself. I was inspiring people around me because they saw what was capable. I was a reflection for themselves. So I felt good, I was growing. And then I ended up finishing the business school with a GPA of 3.8, 3.83, which is nearly, almost like a 4.0 in every single class, an A in every single class that I took. And then also with regard to when I did my weightlifting competition, I mean, there's. I could choose a million different stories. These are the top two. The amount of discipline and dedication it took to. To push through that as I came out the other end, I mean, I. I was so proud of that experience because it. It shaped my life and. And made me understand, like, well, what am I really capable of if I put my mind to it? So I'll end the personal growth bullet with this, is that when you think of when you feel alive, right? This feeling, a lot of the emotions that we feel in life are very fleeting. You feel them one minute. All of a sudden you go from happy to sad, from scared to excited. Nothing lasts forever. And the sooner you can understand that, the more grace you can give yourself to just allow these emotions to flow through, but also to just kind of redirect your past. But let me go back to the personal growth. I had heard this on the. And I'll tell you about this podcast I was listening to. I think it was Brandon Burchard or Ed Mylett, and they were talking about Ed. It was Brendon Burchard. He was talking about growth and how the highest achievers, they push towards this area of uncertainty because of the feeling of growth. I was like, well, how does that. I'm trying to understand, how does that make sense? What do they mean that by pushing towards this? And they're like, because you feel alive when you take new steps, when you start to get the momentum, it makes you feel alive. So when you finish, when you're approaching a goal and you're about to achieve that goal, you set a new goal to move towards this way. It keeps that feeling going, like new pursuits. Like, write a book. Like, why write a book, right? Whatever your goals are, I mean, you can easily stay where you are and not want to do anything, right? Why? Hey, well, you know, I'm pretty comfortable right here. Like, what, Start a podcast? Why start a podcast, right? You know, why. Why write a book? I mean, I don't need to write a book. It seems like a lot of work, but the. The art, or I should say the act of growing is what makes you feel alive. So this is. I'm. I'm giving you growth in the sense of, you know, going after your goals. But let's talk about personal growth. Let's talk about understanding yourself. This is. I talk about journeys a lot. I talk about, you know, oh, you know, go travel here, go travel there, but how about taking the journey inward? How about taking the journey to understand who you are, what your desires are, what part of you you're showing out to the world. Because sometimes we put masks on and we hide our true self, our aspirations in order to fit in. But if you're not reflecting on who you are, then you're blind to who you. Then you're blind to life because you're not really even sure. You haven't acknowledged yet what, who you are and what your real desires are. So personal growth is first and foremost about getting awareness about yourself and then learning that following your heart but also skilling yourself to. For all of the skills, the talents that you're going to need in order to progress towards your dreams. So let me give you, I'll give you those four ideas one more time. So the first one, I kind of did them out of order. The first one was adventure. I said passionate pursuits, but for me it's adventure. And they're kind of going of importance, of least importance to most importance, but also some of the like the highest highs to. Well, not really, but the so least importance to most important. Right? So first is adventure. Like getting out there, getting a sense of adventure because it will fuel you, it'll give you this feeling of feeling alive. And sometimes that that feeling alone when you're feeling it spills into all the other areas of your life and allows everything to lift up. Secondly is passionate pursuits. Every day do something that you're passionate about because by doing something you allow yourself just to find joy in the small moments that you allow yourself to. To not put off pleasure but actually to enjoy it while you're on that journey. Number three is great relationships. Everything you want is going to require someone else's help too. But not only that, but when we have great relationships, when we feel understood, our. Our sense of happiness increases. So get out there, form some relationships. And if you are saying that you don't have any friendships or relate deep relationships, just make some, right? The way you grow a relationship is by spending time there and it doesn't have to be about you. You may feel self conscious. I don't know what to say. I don't want to share. Ask about them. The more you understand about other people, the more inclined that you'll probably. You'll be able to relate and you'll be able to. They'll end up, you know, say hey, well what do you think? And you know, then you start sharing your own feelings. Get out there, make some friends, deepen those relationships. And lastly growth. Do something today that is gonna push your Own personal growth. Maybe it is just getting a journaling and saying, okay, like, well, let me journal, let me see. How am I feeling right now? Like, how do I feel about my life in the direction that I'm going and what needs to change? Like, this is awareness is the first step to growth. So you gotta get awareness. You gotta understand, like, who are you really? What is it that you really want in this life? Because life is. We have this habit, or I wanna say the propensity to think that life is gonna go on forever when the truth is that not a single one of us knows when our time is gonna come. And I'll leave this. This could be a whole different topic altogether. But purpose, when you're reminded of your purpose, it's one of the things that pushes you forward. And then also mortality, when you realize that every day is a gift, every day is a blessing. It changes how you show up in your day because no longer are you taking it for granted that you're going to be here another day, but you're realizing that, you know what? I'm here now. I've got to make good with the time that I have. And I want to feel good about how I spend my. My time today. If today was all there is, I. Sometimes I don't really like going, you know, when I feel like it's. I don't think it's morbid. Some of my friends might say, like, oh, well, wow, that's kind of deep. You're going into talking about death. But, yeah, but let's shine a light on it, right? Let's not pretend like it doesn't exist. Because by acknowledging that your time here is finite, it helps you to dust off, like, the dirt that is covering you from your real desires, from how you really want to show up in your day and in your relationships and in life. So I hope these help you or at the very least will inspire you to look at your life in a different way, to infuse some, you know, to follow your passions, to have some adventures, to grow those relationships and to prioritize your own personal growth, because that is the way that you are going to get the most satisfaction and enjoyment out of life. So I hope you enjoyed this episode here. If you did, please hit that subscribe button. Share it with someone whom you feel could benefit from this. And that is all I've got for you guys today. Hope you enjoyed this episode here. Remember, you only get one life. Live fully, live passionately, and most of all, live now. God bless you guys. And I will see you again soon.