How Do Childhood Experiences Shape Our Ego and Thoughts?

Is the ego the source of our thoughts? Or are our thoughts generated elsewhere and pass through the ego?

Oh, thank you. There is no ego apart from the thoughts, the thoughts. Identification with thoughts is ego. But the thoughts that go through your mind, of course, are linked to the collective mind of the culture you live in, humanity as a whole. So they are not your thoughts as such, but you pick them up from the collective, most of them. And so you identify with thinking and the identification with thinking becomes ego, which means simply that you believe in every thought that arises, and you derive your sense of who you are from what your mind is telling you, of who you are, opinions, viewpoints of that's me. Some people talk to themselves. And you are, oh, you are so good. Why doesn't the world recognize you? Or the mind says, you're no good. Same thing. You're no good at all. You fail at everything, don't you? Again. And then you believe in it. And then you suddenly have a low view of yourself. Why you have a low view because you believed in your thoughts. And why are you thinking those thoughts? Probably you picked them up somewhere, maybe in childhood, maybe your mom was so stressed out that you said, you're no good. And so you pick up certain thoughts and they get stuck in your head, thoughts that you hear in childhood. They're little energy forms, like entities, and they get stuck in your head and don't refuse to go. And the more you believe in it, the more deeply lodged they become in your mind. And so some people are stuck with very hostile entities. I'm saying entity, not in some spooky way, but every thought is an energy form, and as such we could call it an entity. And there are many people in this world who are stuck with hostile life, denying, continuously critical and attacking entities that they carry in their head, and they believe that is who they are. And they are continuously attacking themselves. And if they are not attacking themselves, they attack others around them. Let me tell you who you are. Of course, what they're really saying is, let me tell you who I am. They project. You know the famous saying, we don't see things as they are, we see them as we are. Which means you look at reality through the screen of your thinking and your judgment, which is conditioned by the past, a dreadful prison to live in. It's like blinkers. Worse than blinkers. It's like looking at reality through heavy veils. Oh, looks so dark here. Is that a human being or so the identification with thinking, believing in your thoughts, having no space outside of the movement of Thought again, here we come to the vital lack of space inside. That is the unconscious condition, spiritually completely unconscious. And then you are burdened with a heavy ego. You are the ego, which is not an entity apart from thought. It is thoughts that you have identified with. And the first moment of freedom comes when you realize that certain thoughts have been going through your head for years perhaps, and that they are only thoughts and that you are not the thought, you are the awareness. In my case, I became aware that I had a thought, for example. It started in childhood, one of many negative thoughts I had. Bad things always happen to me. Bad things always happen to me. When I saw people around me, okay, they have got all these nice things and always there would be bad things happening. And of course your perception then becomes selective. When you have a thought like that, you notice much more. Because in everybody's life, things, in daily life, things go wrong. You miss a bus, you get stuck in a traffic jam, or you lose some money. But yes, this is normal. But if you have the thought, bad things always happen to me. You're extremely aware of those things and they confirm to you that the thought is correct. This is the selective perception of reality through the screen of thinking. So the reality will confirm to you. And not only that, that thought or any thought of that kind actually attracts bad things, negative things. Or if you believe people are basically bad and that's a deep seated belief and you don't realize it's only a thought in your head or a belief. Not only do you would you single out where you observe unethical or bad behavior in others, you would, ah, there it is. Not only that, you actually are much more likely to encounter people who manifest that kind of behavior because you attract it. And so that's just incredible how people create their world through that. So freedom comes from stepping out, encountering first of all a little bit of space inside your presence. And then from there you realize certain thoughts as repetitive and just a thought. Bad things always happen to me. Oh, there it goes again. I thought that before. So that's the. To become free of ego means becoming free of thought, identification with thought, that's the end of the ego. It may reassert itself from time to time, but at least that's the awakening. What about your thoughts, habitual thoughts? Do you.

Probably that I have to get everything right. There's intense, you know, figure it out and get it right.

It rules me and if it's not right.

I escape. I just won't do it. I pretty much predict ahead of time so I won't try a lot of times.

Ah yes, yes some people are afraid of not succeeding in whatever they do because they have a self their self image which is derived from thinking would suffer. If I fail at something then my self image will be injured and therefore I'm not even going to try. And again that's to do with deriving your identity from thinking and even the thought I have failed is a lie, I am a failure is an even greater lie. You have not failed. You can simply reinterpret and say I have learned something here this is not for me for example but why believe the lies that your mind produces? So as you know people, many people live with a very hostile mind but those people the motivation, their motivation would probably be very great I would hope to get out of their minds but first they need to realize that their problems are self generated mind generated not world generated. Thank you.