Eckhart Tolle explores how to talk without getting trapped in your own thoughts and positions. He uses the example of an acupuncturist working in a Western medical setting to show how presence and awareness change what's possible in conversation.
Thank you for spreading such a positive shining light. My question is a fun kind of question. I was wondering, is it possible to have a conscious conversation?
Yes. Yes. Have you experimented with that?
Yes, I have. I came to the conclusion that maybe two people wouldn't actually be talking to each other in a conscious conversation. They would be sitting opposite each other in awareness.
Oh, well, that's even better. But a conscious conversation is basically a conversation where between two people, each person is not identified with their viewpoint, their perspective, their mental position. They put forward their perspective, their positions, their viewpoints without any sense of self in it, because they don't need that. Because their sense of self is derived from the presence that they can sense throughout the conversation in the background of their being. And then they can play with concepts, they can play with opinions, they can play with words, they can play with arguments even this is my argument is this. And then the other person. Well, and mine is that I. There's a. The famous saying, we. What is it? We agree to disagree. Something like that. That sounds relatively conscious. Because if you, at least, if you're not identified with your positions, then that's fine. We agree. That's okay. It's interesting. Self identification with mental positions is the unconsciousness because then you will be defending your mental positions, but you're really defending your sense of self. And this is why these conversations become. Can easily and very quickly become very unpleasant. They are unconscious. So in unconscious conversation and with very unconscious people, it can even happen. I mean, you can probably read about it in the papers all the time. They get so defensive and aggressive about their respective mental positions, they start physically attacking each other. It even happens sometimes. You can see it in certain parliaments in some places. And suddenly all these members of parliament start attacking each other. Washington sometimes gets close, but it probably hasn't quite had the. That could happen there too, who knows? So what is your experience with being engaged in conversation? Do you easily get into that position where you start to defend your sense of self?
In my case, I've been experimenting with thoughtless awareness.
Yes.
And I've been present, appreciating and being aware of the essence of the individual in front of me.
Yes.
Listening to their words, but just allowing that presence of acceptance. However, I've struggled with returning a conversation point in that state.
Yes, that's right. And that's where the real practice begins. Because if you kind of withdraw from engagement, then it's relatively easy to sustain practice presence. But when you begin to actually interact verbally and thoughts, of course, thoughts become words. Then the real practice begins. And especially if you engage in a conversation with certain things that you feel strongly about and ideally you choose somebody who has the totally opposite viewpoints, then you can really practice.
It's funny you should mention that because I'm an acupuncturist.
Sorry?
I'm an acupuncturist.
Oh yeah.
And I've just started a position in a hospital in Central Sydney. And the way I operate with energy medicine is in an opposite position to Western medicine in many respects from a thought based point of view. And so I'm meeting a lot of individuals who have got a very strong position and I'm trying my best to allow this concept into this new institution. So I should imagine I'll be facing a lot of challenges.
Yes. So you can, there's a lot of. You can be practicing conscious conversation, especially with physicians who say I don't believe in all that. And I know that's all, that's a load of rubbish, but you do what you do. But then that could be an interesting conscious conversation. So it can be challenging. But the art is to remain present even as you put forward your point of view. So that, and this is important, I've said it before, but I say it again so that you don't identify with whatever thoughts you are expressing. Identify meaning that they constitute your sense of self. And that's unconscious. That is self identification with thinking. That's the essence of unconsciousness. And so in order to counteract that, because there is an enormous pull when you start arguing with somebody or they argue with you, there needs to be a high degree of alertness in you. And that alertness is presence. And that alertness needs to be there and then the words need to come out.
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