The Practice of Conscious Business Relationships | The Conscious Business Challenge (Week 2)

My question's probably been answered three times, so. And frankly, I can't remember exactly what I wrote. So I'll sort of speak from the cuff. Talk about the honest no. Talk about giving and receiving the honest. No. In terms of exchanges, I just finished business school and thank God this is a totally different learning experience than what I learned in the classroom. So perhaps talk about exchange and how to give and receive. An honest no in business dealings and maybe romantic relationships also.

So the actual question is.

What? Is there anything in this world that I ought, that I. That I ought to associate with an exchange? The way that, you know that economics and business and profit making sort of teaching tells us that, that like business, any sort of exchange in business.

Yes.

Profiting.

Yes. Whether there's anything wrong with it.

Right. How to deal with. With an exchange, perhaps without being in a business, dealing without being taken advantage of or exploited.

Yes. Whether it's business or something else, the question is always whether what I sometimes call the transcendent dimension is still operating in your life. While in the background of your life, while in the foreground, you talk about business dealings with another person or whatever it may be. If the transcendent dimension is not there, then it becomes very problematic and all kinds of psychological self seeking and so on comes in and interferes with what could be a much more efficient way of even doing business. It's through self seeking and seeking something, seeking some advantage through the other, that a lot of dysfunction comes into business. So there are always two levels. It's probably easier to give an actual example. Let's say you want to sell something to somebody, whatever it may be, whether big or small. Maybe you're selling a. I work in.

Hospital business, so hospital services, for example.

Yes. So you're always relating. There will be another human being there. You were talking about whatever it is on a practical level that needs to be discussed. You explain what you have to offer and the other person listens or ask questions. You explain more. Can you. The question is then, can you sense. Where's the word empathy, meaning feeling your way into the other human being to feel or to sense the consciousness, that is that which animates the other human being. The consciousness behind the words, not what the person says, but the consciousness that enables those words to be articulated. In other words, the essence of that other person. Can you feel the essence of that person? But you can only feel that if you can feel it in yourself. So while you explain the practical side of it, also there is an awareness behind, at the back of you, of this other human being and you sense the shared consciousness of you and the other. That sounds perhaps a little bit abstract, but it's actually quite easy. For example, it just means you become very still when you listen to that person because that person will occasionally speak. And then you are alert and still and you begin to sense and acknowledge the aliveness of that human being beyond the function of that human being. Because on the function level, you have this particular function, a role that you play. And this person has a particular function, a role that he or she plays, two roles. And people kind of slip into their roles and they act out their roles. And that's fine, there's nothing wrong with that. Except that is that all there is. If you are, if the other person is a client, here already we have a role. Because the moment you say my client, you have already of course put that person into that role. And that person sees him or herself as a client, so he or she accepts the role. And you have another word for yourself as this or that, another role. If there's only that, then you really, the other person becomes to you a means to an end. And if it doesn't work out on the level of your respective roles, not infrequently there is negative feelings. You see that with many people when the deal is not going to be reached, they get angry and negative. And suddenly before they gave you all kinds of things and now suddenly they become angry towards you just because the deal is not being reached, that they wanted, they wanted something from you. They were nowhere interested in you as a being. They were only interested in you as the role because it through that they were seeking something to enhance their role. But those that are very good at that are very successful even in business, tend to be those who are not primarily interested in the outcome of their particular role playing, but are truly interested in the human being. They enjoy being with the other. That's perhaps how they perceive it. But what that really means, you can only enjoy being with the other when you transcend the limitations of your person. Personal selfhood, in other words, the transcendent dimension. Now that's in any relationship, whether it's an intimate relationship, business relationship, any relationship is the transcendent dimension there. That is the question. I have occasionally met people who are so in business who want to sell you something. And you say no, not really after listening to them. No, I'm not really. And they truly don't mind because they love interacting with other humans. And it's often they that finally people actually come back to them. They say, no, I'm not inside. I'm going to look at some other of your competitors. Fine. Yeah, that's fine. Why do you have a look around? And they enjoy the interaction in the present moment without making you into a means to an end. So that's the question. Bring the transcendent dimension into the relationship. And also then the fear that they might cheat you isn't there anymore. Because that's only again, as we talked about earlier. The mind projecting itself and being suspicious is an important part of the egoic sense of self. Suspect. What are his motivations? What does he really want? Whereas if you live in presence, you don't even question people's motivations. You just look and you speak. You don't care what their motivations are. I'm always surprised when people talk about people's motivations. I've never seen that. Maybe they are right, but I don't see it, don't want to see it. So in any human interaction, the two dimensions need to be present. You as the person playing your role, yes, but you are not confined. Your consciousness is not confined to that role alone. There is some free consciousness left, so to speak, the unconditioned in the background. And you sense that, and then that is you beyond the role. You as presence rather than you as a person. And also the other. There's the other as a person with his role, and then there's the other as consciousness. So whenever you look at a human being, first you look at the physical. And usually when you're in your mind already, the mind will judge the physical. And then the next is what you see is the psychological self of that person, how they speak, what they say, and you look into that. So there's the physical form of the person, and then you see the psychological form of the person. And usually that's where most humans get stuck there. They see it as physical and psychological. And in themselves also, they identified with their physical body and their psychological form, identity, I call it. So they relate only to form, roles, bodies, ego's form, identity, essence. Identity is the transcendent. So in any situation, can you sense your own essence beyond the person, its presence? That's the question. And while you are interacting and conducting your business, if you can continue to sense your essence while you talk about the product or whatever it is, your attention is not totally absorbed by that. And then the strange thing happens. People love you because they feel so good in your presence. Maybe not everybody. Some may not get it at all. They're so identified with their mind that they don't get it at all. But most people have some, a little bit of an opening where they can sense that you are present. They don't have a word for it. What they register is that they like to be in your company. And so I experience that occasionally I visit an accountant and always we love, I don't like, I have no idea what accountant is talking about ever. So the moment she opens her mouth and talks for 10 minutes, I haven't understood a single word. But the interaction is lovely because I go there and look at her and we talk about the weather, how was the weekend. But there's more than the words. There's a meeting on a deeper level. And while she talks and I don't understand, I'm just present. I don't even try because I know I won't understand it. Just presence. And we have wonderful interaction. She loves hearing from me. And there's just one example of bringing transcendence into ordinary situation. So I believe if I became a second car, secondhand car salesperson, I would do very well. Because I don't care whether they buy the car or not. I'm just.

Thank you.

Something much more pleasant is our interaction at this moment. Whatever you want to buy, buy it or don't buy it. But I enjoy the interaction of this moment. Much more enjoyable than any future moment where you might buy it. Or it's wonderful if you don't care. And of course that's already expressed in the. What I, what I called don't care is expressed in the Bhagavad Gita, the ancient Indian sacred scripture, where it is called Karma Yoga, which means not to be attached to the fruit of your action. That means not to be attached to the outcome, the mentally projected outcome, but simply to be present with the action. The fruit will look after itself. That's what it says. And Jesus puts it in slightly different words. He says, don't be concerned about tomorrow. Tomorrow will look after itself. That's also because the fruit is the future outcome. So the beautiful teaching of Karma Yoga is to bring presence into whatever you do so that the doing is not a means to an end, at least not primarily. A little bit of that maybe there means to an end because the reason why this person is, has come to you when you're a car salesman is because he wanted to buy a car. So there's a little bit present of that reason. But the true reason is the human interaction. If that comes the primary thing, then all these relationships are enjoyable in themselves. And the amazing thing is the fruit of the action is actually much more bountiful when you are not looking to it. The bounty comes of itself because you give your fullest attention to the present moment. You don't have a large percentage of your attention where you want to get to the fruit of the action. So you lose power. Then you lose, not egoic power to a true spiritual power. When you take your attention into this is what I want, then a lot of your attention is there and then you are interacting there as a means towards getting there. It just doesn't work. So really anything you do can become karma yoga, it can become a spiritual practice. That's the beauty of it. By letting go of attachment to the outcome and a huge amount of conflict disappears from your life. Totally unnecessary, but very normal conflict. When you let go of attachment to the fruit of your action of the outcome, then you can just be with the present moment. Because an enormous amount of conflict is generated by people who are attached to the outcome, Even just humans letting go of that. The amount of conflict on the planet would be reduced enormously. But we don't have to wait for others to do it. We have to do it for ourselves. So experience the freedom that comes when you let go of attachment to the outcome of what you're doing. Then you can truly give your fullest attention to the doing. And that there's joy in that, there's aliveness in that. So your whole life becomes the spiritual practice. Your entire life then becomes the spiritual practice. And it becomes increasingly present moment centered. That's where the power is. And it's in you, but it's not of you, not the form of you. Just wonderful. So happy practice. And when things arise, negativity and upset or whatever arises, often you may ask yourself, am I attached to the outcome here? What I want to come of this situation? Or am I giving my fullest attention to that? The moment you are attached to the outcome, ultimately you suffer, you suffer. And some people still need that. They're not ready to hear, let go of the attachment to the outcome. They're not ready to hear it yet, they need a bit more suffering. As long as you need suffering, you'll get it. For many people, suffering is their spiritual teacher. And eventually it awakens you when you've suffered enough. And then at that moment, when you're ready to not suffer anymore, you've had enough of it, something comes into your life that shows you another way. It could be a book. It could be something you overhear on the radio, television, a comment, or you meet somebody who says something or you walk in a bookstore and the power of now falls off the shelf as you walk. Which actually happened to one person who told me that story. She walked in and the power of now fell off the shelf and she picked it up and it changed her life. This is why there's the saying when the student is ready, the teacher appears. And that's always the case. So don't get too concerned. If you still if you know people who you're hoping and wanting that they are ready to hear what you're saying or to get it and they don't, it's fine, they will in time. If they don't, just a little bit more. They need a little bit more of that teacher. That's called suffering. The most popular spiritual teacher on the planet, the greatest guru. No doubt about that moment of stillness, although the stillness has been there in the background all the time.

Sa.