You Can Let Go Without Forgetting | Eckhart Tolle

You can acknowledge that the bad things that happen to you in your life. The question is, do you need to derive a sense of self from those things, from having been a victim of this, that, or the other? You would be amazed how many humans carry this heavy burden of an unhappy sense of self. Now you might say, well, many humans are justified, are they not justified in their unhappiness? Are they not justified in being unhappy because so many bad things happen to humans? Well, every human has to learn that there is the external reality and there is the consciousness with which I meet my so-called external reality that determines my life. So many humans are trapped in a very unhappy sense of identity, and many humans may have good reason for being unhappy. If they look in their— what happened— many humans had a very unpleasant childhood, perhaps abused as children, had all kinds of many bad things happen to humans in this world. And you can acknowledge things that have happened in your life. The question is, Do you derive your sense of self from the bad things in your life? Because if you do, you're deriving your sense of self from certain memories, both in your mind and emotional memories. There is a danger. You can acknowledge that the bad things that happen to you in your life. The question is Do you need to derive a sense of self from those things, from having been a victim of this, that, or the other? Do you derive your sense of self from that? Do you recognize, yes, the world is full of misdeeds and bad things because it's full of unconscious humans? Unconscious humans spread unhappiness and suffering. To others. They make themselves suffer and they make others suffer. So the question is, do you derive your sense of self from those things, or are they simply something that you do remember? But are you able to derive your sense of self from a deeper place? And that's what liberates you from the past. It doesn't mean liberation from the past does not mean that you forget the past. You remember it. You don't obsessively think about it anymore, but you remember it. It's kind of there. It's almost as if it's— I speak from how I experience it. My childhood wasn't very pleasant. It wasn't the worst possible childhood, but it wasn't But it was painful. And I remember those things occasionally, but it's almost as if it was somebody else, it's happened to somebody else. I know it happened to me, but it feels as if it happened to somebody else. It has zero emotional charge, nothing, just a memory. There's no identification is derived from it. And that— now, in order to become free of that, it's very important, your sense of self needs to be derived from the deep I, not the surface I, because the surface I is your historical I, historical person. And here we come to the most essential part, here and now. In this moment where— let's ask the question: are you able to, as you sit here, have perhaps at least a glimpse, or perhaps something deeper than— more than a glimpse of what it is that the words that I use, what they refer, what it is that the words actually refer to. The deep I. When you hear those words, question is, can you sense that in you that recognizes the meaning of these words without having to think about it. There's nothing to think about. You cannot figure out what deep I is by thinking about deep I. You have to— the moment you hear deep I, you need to let go of the words. And then, is there a reality? Can you sense maybe in the background of your being, your innermost being, can you sense the reality to which the words point— here and now. What is not helpful is to think about it. Not helpful at all. But somebody here who got invited by a friend or relative may be asking, what are you talking about? You can't not think about it. How would I even know what you're saying? But how can I not think about it? Is it possible to not think? For example, now, let's just see if it's possible for 10 seconds, or maybe even you've not, you haven't been thinking the last while you've been sitting here, just taking in the words without trying to figure anything out. So the words go in, they touch something deep within, and then you feel that more strongly. That's wonderful. Or the words got— they hit your mind and they cannot go deeper than the conceptual mind. So the words go into your ears They go into the brain or whatever, and then there's their conceptual mind. They cannot get past your conceptual mind. What's he talking about? I don't understand. I'm trying to understand, but I don't— Yeah, but don't try to understand. There's nothing to understand conceptually. There's something to know, but not understand conceptually. Very important distinction. There are two ways of knowing. One is knowing through concepts, figuring it out. There's a deeper knowing that is beyond conceptualization, and that is, there's a vast intelligence that operates in the deep eye, this deeper knowing that is a non-conceptual intelligence. Where you can know something without having to think about it. And this includes understanding what this is all about. You cannot understand it conceptually. Is it possible to sit here and simply be aware, not needing to think, just aware of whatever is here. First of all, you're aware of your sense perceptions here, hearing words, taking in the totality of this room, and then perhaps become aware that you're breathing. And perhaps become aware of the aliveness within your body that is beyond the physical body, that which animates the body. The inner body, I call it. Can you feel that there's an aliveness in your hands, your feet, your legs? There's an aliveness that is the animating principle behind the body, that which gives life to the body, the vast intelligence that coordinates all the functions of the body every second, every minute. Even now, we only understand a fragment of it. There's an intelligence in you that is far greater than your mind. You wouldn't be able to rock— control the functions of your body. But then there's more than you kind of— you feel the being of you, so to speak. And body awareness, the inner body awareness, is a portal into feeling the being of you.