Give Me 18 Minutes and I'll Make You Unstoppable
In this 18‑minute motivational talk, the hosts explore why many people who study manifestation techniques still struggle to change their reality. They argue that a hidden sense of entitlement—stemming from years of hard‑working struggle—blocks the willingness to take concrete action, turning manifestation into a passive fantasy. The discussion introduces the "pendulum swing" metaphor, describing how seekers swing from over‑identifying with hard work to over‑relying on visualization, neglecting the necessary co‑creative partnership between personal effort and universal energy. They examine the internal conflict between masculine (action‑oriented) and feminine (creative, visual) energies, noting that a wounded relationship with action fuels entitlement. A core framework is presented: distinguishing "expansive hard" (discomfort that leads to growth) from "constrictive hard" (short‑term comfort that creates long‑term pain). By reframing decision points—e.g., doing an essay early versus procrastinating—they illustrate how immediate, purposeful discomfort reduces cumulative suffering. The speakers further stress that successful people treat setbacks as feedback, not failure, adopting a "learn before you earn" mindset. Personal anecdotes (hosting a live call with no audience, early YouTube struggles) demonstrate how feedback loops drive improvement. Finally, they address fear, describing it as "a mile wide and an inch deep" and emphasizing that confronting fear shrinks it, revealing that the greatest potential lies beyond it. The overall message is that true manifestation requires active responsibility, purposeful discomfort, and a willingness to face fear, turning entitlement into empowerment.
Chapters
This is going to be a little bit of a tough one to swallow for a lot of you, but it's really, really important. There could be one thing if you're trying all the manifestation hacks, if you are watching all of the videos, all the content, you're reading all the books, the Neville Goddard, the Florence Shen, all of that, which I love, and your reality still isn't changing, it may be because you have a sense of entitlement and that sense of entitlement is protecting you from a part of you that doesn't think you're capable of taking the actions that are necessary in order to manifest your desired reality, because action is a necessary part of the process of manifestation. So if that hurt you to hear, maybe you really need to listen to this. But this is something that I need to maybe hold my hand up about my past content and say, when we learn about reality creation, when we learn about the power of our energy, when we learn about the power we have in visualizing and imagining our desired reality, there is a tendency to get so excited about how powerful we are in our energy, in our state, and how that stuff really can make a difference that we forget how important action and taking responsibility for what we're actually doing in physical reality in this present moment actually is. Okay, and so this is something that I like to call a pendulum swing. Essentially, it— because many of us who happen upon manifestation content, who are developing our mindsets, etc., etc., because many of us spent most of our lives working really hard and not getting a lot of results, working really hard and just having to suffer and struggle just to get by. When we discover things like manifestation, when we discover the power of our energy, the power of visualization, We go from one end of the pendulum and we swing all the way over in the other direction because it's a relief. It feels like a relief and it's healing a part of us that thought, okay, maybe I'm not deserving of success unless I work myself to the bone, unless I struggle, unless I really strive and have to suffer for it. So A lot of people in this space, and there was a little part of me that had this as well, this is why I'm able to talk to you about it, I've just been through it, I've just released it. A lot of people in this space, they want to spiritually bypass the work, the actual actions that need to be taken, the decisions that need to be made, the boundaries that need to be set, the changes that they need to make in their physical reality in order for manifestation to actually occur. And the reason for that is they don't trust themselves. To take the action. They have a bad relationship with taking action. They have a wound internally with their inner masculine energy because they spent their whole lives taking action using just masculine energy, that when they discover the vision, the creativity, all these feminine aspects, that feels so much easier. It feels so much better. And there's a sense of entitlement— this is where the entitlement comes in— of I've spent my whole life struggling and getting nothing for it. And now that I know the power of my energy and I know how manifestation works and I know how to visualize, I'm just gonna do that and I'm not taking action because I deserve to have something good come to me because I've already suffered. That's where the entitlement comes in. Okay? And so then what happens is we get into a passive state when manifestation is not a passive process. It's an active co-creative process.
Co-creative.
It is you and the universe. Okay? It's not just the universe. It is also you. Why would God, why would your higher self choose to come into a physical body in a physical world if not for you to actually use the physical body to help birth things into creation?
Okay? So successful people have a very different relationship to discomfort than people who are not so successful in physical reality. And you can even see this if we take the example of someone who's physically fit, who's achieved success in health and fitness, for example, as a category. Someone who has not been so successful in that category sees going to the gym and eating healthy as very hard. They see it as too difficult or too challenging. When they think about doing it, They associate a lot of pain with that type of discomfort of going to the gym, lifting the weights, following a meal plan. And so, because their brain associates so much pain with doing that activity, they don't do it. They give in to the Doritos and to the couch, and they lay there, and they just never change their behavior. If you look at someone who's been very successful in their health and fitness, they have a very different relationship with the discomfort. that is required to become healthy and fit. When they think about going to the gym and lifting weights, yes, they're going to think, yeah, this is hard, but they're thinking about what they're going to get from that discomfort. So there's a key distinction here. You're either in either situation. So let's say you're sitting on the couch eating the Doritos, or you have the decision to go to the gym and lift weights. Okay? Those are your 2 decisions. One of them is actually uncomfortable in a constrictive way, and one of them is uncomfortable in an expansive way. When you decide to stay in the comfort zone and not do the thing that's going to maybe grow you or evolve you, you're actually choosing something that is hard in a constrictive way. Why? Because with the option of not going to the gym, you're choosing the pain of living your whole life not feeling like your best self. You're choosing actually the pain of feeling unhealthy, feeling unfit, not feeling good in your body because that's a familiar pain, rather than choosing the pain of going to the gym and having temporary discomfort for long-term gain and satisfaction. So typically what this boils down to, and if you want to start reframing your mindset so that you can cultivate a success paradigm, you've got to change your relationship to discomfort and start to realize that Most of the things that we choose in the short term for pleasure are going to bring us long-term discomfort that far outweighs any short-term discomfort that would come with taking the action that's going to grow us. So there's 2 types of hard: expansive hard or constrictive hard. Expansive hard is in the moment you do the thing that feels uncomfortable, but you know it's going to grow you. So you get up and you go for the run even though it feels difficult, because you know in the long run this is going to be the thing that brings you the most amount of pleasure and satisfaction versus constrictive hard is you choose the option in the moment. For example, you don't go for the run, you sit down on the couch and you watch the movie. And in the moment that feels better, but in the long term, it's constricting your energy, it's constricting your growth. It's highly unlikely that you'll become successful if you are constantly choosing the option that gives you temporary satisfaction. And avoids pain temporarily, but causes you to suffer pain long-term, like procrastination as another example. Okay? So you think, oh, I need to get this task done, right? Let's say you need to finish an essay and you know it's due on Friday, maybe it's Tuesday. And rather than facing the discomfort now head-on and completing it now, you decide to sit in discomfort long-term. Until Friday, knowing that you're going to have to face the discomfort anyway at one point. So there's 2 roads here. I want you to start choosing, like seeing these decision moments as 2 paths, right? When you're faced with a decision like this, where you're either going to have to face a pain or discomfort now and let it just grow you now, or you can avoid it and just push it away and procrastinate it. Those 2 options are going to unfold like this. Option A, you don't do the thing.
Okay, so let's say this essay, you don't do the thing on Tuesday.
You kind of sit in this discomfort and this suffering because this thing is in the back of your mind. So everything that you do up until you do this thing is laced with like this heaviness and this feeling of I should be doing something else. So you're experiencing like low-level pain and discomfort constantly anyway, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Thursday night comes around, you realize, wow, I need to do this essay. You sit down and do the essay, you realize you don't have that much time to do it. So the amount of pain and discomfort that you feel when you actually finally do it is probably 2x what you would feel if you had just done it on Tuesday. So accumulative, the amount of pain and discomfort you feel by procrastinating this thing is actually much bigger than option B. Option B is Tuesday. Oh, you realize I need to do this essay. You sit down to do the essay. The peak amount of pain and discomfort you feel is when you sit down to do the thing, but you start doing the thing and immediately the pain drops off and the pleasure and satisfaction of you getting this thing done starts to kick in. And then you start to actually feel like satisfied that you're doing this thing. You get it done and that pain disappears. So you experience maybe this amount of pain or discomfort when you actually do it. When you think about it on Tuesday versus when you leave it until Friday, you might experience this amount, which is interesting because the reason that you avoided it and you didn't do it on Tuesday is because your brain attached too much challenge, struggle, pain, and discomfort with doing this thing. So you got to realize that your brain is automatically going to do this, and you need to be stronger than those thoughts that your mind is firing at you when something new or uncomfortable comes up to be done. One more example. Starting your dream business is hard. Making cold calls is hard. Doing the unknown without any evidence that it's going to work is hard. Staying in a misaligned, unfulfilling job for very low pay for your whole life is also hard. Choose your hard. They're both hard. One is expansive, one is constrictive. Successful people run headfirst at the things that are difficult but are expansive. That is how they become successful. So I can't think now because I've reframed my paradigm. Everything that I do is challenging and difficult because everything that I do is outside my comfort zone, but it's a good type of discomfort. It's an enjoyable type of discomfort. Why? Because I've done it so many times that every single time I do something that's uncomfortable and outside of my normal range of things that I would do, even though it's maybe a little bit painful or difficult, I get so much pleasure out of it because I know the reward that I'm going to get from it. I know it's expanding me. I can't actually think of anything more difficult now than going back to a 9-to-5 job that is unfulfilling and paying me buttons, right? So, You can only cultivate this mindset by changing your association right now with what is hard. A lot of people are slowed down by this fear of failure. What is failure? Who came up with that? You made a mistake, something didn't work out, the plan fell through, you lost some money. Okay, these things are happening objectively. Maybe your video flopped, maybe no one bought your thing. You could define that as a failure, or you could define that as feedback. People with a mindset for success who actually succeed in life, they see that as feedback, not as definitive, not as the end of the road, not as a failure where they're never going to recover from it. No. So the people who you see that are most successful in this world, they have failed their way to success. And they've treated every single failure simply as an opportunity to learn. There's a quote that I absolutely love. It's, you are either learning or you're earning. And anytime that you're not earning in reality, anytime that maybe you are experiencing a setback, that is simply an opportunity for you to learn something that you've never learned before so that you can become the version of you who can earn whatever it is you want to earn at this next level. I had to host live call, a live call in my community with nobody on it and show up to that call and teach it anyway so that I could learn how to actually engage in the community and put it out there and do a call that people wanted to actually attend. When I first started on YouTube, I felt like a big fat failure because I had an expectation that I was going to get a million views on my first video, which by the way, we just hit a million views on a video. Thank you guys. That is wild. What? Not wild. I've been manifesting that for years, but it's surreal. So thank you all so much. But anyway, when I started on YouTube just over 2 years ago, I— my definition of success was in my first few videos, I'm gonna get loads of views, maybe not a million, but I was gonna go viral immediately. I didn't. I was getting like 100 views per video for the first few videos. So to my mind back then, That was a failure. If I had stayed in resistance to the feedback of only getting a few hundred views per video, and I just dwelled and said, this means that I'm not good enough, this means that I'm a failure, which I did for a little while until I pulled myself out of that place, I never would have been able to objectively look at, well, what is this feedback here to teach me? What is this feedback here to tell me? What's not working? What can I take responsibility for? That is the mindset of success. You don't take the failure or the feedback to heart and make it mean there's something wrong with you. You take it as data, as information, and you go, okay, this isn't working. What can I take responsibility for? What can I change? And what can I learn from this. When you treat failures like that, you cannot fail. You can only grow and evolve. So, from that new mindset and that new perspective, I actually watched my videos and I said, you know what? These are not that good. These are not that good. The lighting is bad. The sound is bad. I didn't even plan them very well. I haven't been reading. I haven't been researching. And boom, I was able to see all of the feedback from this setback that I needed in order to learn and grow and evolve so that I could earn my next level of success. That is how the path works. Every successful person has failed their way to success, and the only way that they were able to do that is because they were humble enough to learn before they earned. So every setback is a learning opportunity. You cannot lose when that is your mindset.
Unfortunately, if you're going to be stepping into your full potential in this lifetime, you are going to have to face and process quite a bit of fear. I actually am getting to the point where I believe that God places our fulfillment, our purpose, and our highest potential On the other side of our biggest fears. That's what I have lived personally.
That is what I have learned.
And the only way through the fear is by facing it. Fear is a mile wide and an inch deep. I always say that. I got that from Leila Hormozi, but it's so true.
And there's another quote as well.
You often suffer more in imagination than you do in reality. As soon as you face the fear and you start walking into it, the fear itself actually drops off, and you begin to see that there was never anything really to fear in the first place. And actually, there's so much good, there's so much to gain on the other side of the things that you fear.
And as soon as I walked into the podcast studio, I was reminded of that because it was cozy, it was warm, it was amazing.
It was run so smoothly. I was made to feel so comfortable. And my imagination was just making up this big scary story that wasn't even reality. And that is always the case with fear.
So just remember, fear is at an all-time high when you're on the bench looking at everyone in the game, thinking about getting in the game.
As soon as you get in the game, the fear disappears. So don't rob yourself of a life that could be lived in your potential, actually with so much less fear because you decided to run right through it.
