Reconnect to the Divinity Within You

Hey everyone, I'm coming to you from Sedona today. I'm hoping you're feeling the energy, the beautiful vibes of Sedona through the screen. I wanted to record this outside even though it's like 35 freaking degrees because I want you to just feel the healing energy of Sedona as I'm sitting here and we can embrace it together. This week I've spent almost a week in Sedona. I packed my bags, went on my own, rented a convertible drove from Phoenix to Sedona, and I had a spiritual retreat on Wednesday and Thursday. So 2 days ago it finished, and it has been like a breath of fresh air to my soul. It has been just exactly what I needed that I didn't even know I needed coming here. And there's so many layers to everything that I've been realizing. And so many things I want to share, but I'm going to keep it directly relevant to what I think is going to help you guys. You wait for that plane to pass. I don't know if you can hear that. One of the biggest takeaways from this week: I didn't realize how starved I was for actual close human connection in community. This is the first retreat that I went to this week that I've ever been to. And I know a lot of you guys may have been to retreats before. I don't know why I've never gone to one before, but I've never stood arm to arm, shoulder to shoulder, hand in hand with a bunch of people who are on the same mission, have the same intentions, have integrity, have their hearts open. And felt the power of that. I've never done that in person. And one thing about being on YouTube and being online with everything that I'm doing, I'm so grateful for all of you guys, but what can happen is I live in Spain, so most of my audience is not in Spain, and I had never even met anyone in person who knows me through YouTube up until like a week ago when I started traveling to the US. Funny enough, the first person I met was actually in the airport in Spain, and then there were a few more that I met here, which was just amazing. And if you're watching this, please say hi in the comments because it was so, so nice to meet you guys. But yeah, I end up in like this echo chamber of I'm growing and I'm creating and everything's happening, but it's almost like I don't have those mirrors physically in person and energetically in person to reflect that back to me. I might see a comment or I get like amazing DMs from you guys and I love them so much and I love you all so much for reaching out to me, but I don't get to fully feel like your energy and connect and see your heart. And that's one thing that this week I realized. This is something quite deep, and I'm hoping in me sharing this with you, you might reflect on this if you have this as well yourself. But I had this heart wall, and part of it was I've been underestimating people, like That's the only way I can describe it. I've been humbled. I've been divinely humbled in the best way this week. So I came into this retreat with a lot of like fear and resistance. I've vlogged about it, so there will be a vlog coming soon. And I shared live how I was feeling. I was almost like scared. I was a little bit on my high horse. I was almost scared that like, um, everything will be too woo-woo and too love and light, and I was resisting that it was just going to be too weird, and I didn't want to like be weird like that or something. And then what happened was, once I— once we were in and we were meditating together and everything opened up, there's no other option but to like open your heart and to be love and light and to connect in love with people. Like, that, that is, that is the only way. Like, it's just like a natural byproduct of connecting in a space like that, in an intimate space like that, like a retreat where you're meditating together. And on day 2, so day 1, we did a lot of shadow work, we did a lot of purging, and I will leave the link below to the woman who runs this, I'll leave her channel below, Maria. But day 1 was a lot of shadow work. I didn't feel, I didn't feel that much release on day 1, like I wasn't crying like a lot of people were, I wasn't really getting deep, deep into some of the stuff that was coming up. Um, but day 2, I did feel a big shift in my energy. And I remember I was speaking to people individually. I met 2 amazing girls from Ireland. I met this beautiful Ukrainian woman who lives here in Phoenix and just some amazing people. And as I was talking to people, the, like, the pieces of my ego that were holding onto this idea that other people don't get me or other people aren't in tune with what I'm in tune with. That all had to just fall away. It was just being rewritten because people are so incredible. There are so many people out there who understand you, who have the same heart as you, who have the same integrity as you, who have very similar missions to you. Like, what my eyes have been opened up to is, I don't know, I've just been in like this box of my routine and creating, and I have my mission, but I got kind of far from my mission, and I got far, far, far away from the fact, or I don't even think I've ever realized the fact, that there's a whole team of people who are on the same mission as me. And I've always known there's good in people. I've always seen potential in people, but I've never been able to like connect, really, really connect, like heart to heart, in person, embodied like that, and feel it, like fully feel it in a community, like not just one person. Because I do feel obviously one-on-one with people when I do coaching and everything. By the way, I don't have any coaching spaces, guys, so I'm sorry, please don't ask me. It's completely closed. We're working on some new stuff and I will be announcing some stuff soon. But yeah. It just made me fall back in love with people, and it made me realize that I had not been giving people enough credit, and I had been blind to the fact that there are brave, powerful, loving, kind, wonderful people in this world, and they're doing good, and their hearts are open, and their, their missions, their values their truth is aligned with my truth and probably with your truth if you are a subscriber of this channel. And so, I mean, like, there's— guys, there's 140-something thousand of us on this channel. And so I just wanted to communicate that and let you know, because even though I have so many of you guys here, I still even got into this mental loop of like, nobody really gets me, like it's kind of me against the world, and that was just shattered this week because each person I met at this retreat were so insanely powerful and just wise and loving, and it was just so eye-opening to me. Which leads me to my next point with the power of community. I didn't realize how starving I was for that, like, just heart-to-heart, like, safe connection where we're all in harmonious vibration, because obviously I'm, I've shifted so much, my energy has shifted so, so, so much, and I almost feel like, I don't know what, I don't, I'm opening up to what my, what my path is and what exactly I'm supposed to be here to help you guys with and here to bring into this world, and I'm almost there, I'm just staying open to it, but part of it is definitely the fact that I I think I have a little bit of a wayshower archetype. Like, I feel I am put through things, very specific things, and I go through them myself so that I can share them with you guys. So, so much has changed within me even since starting this channel. Having this platform and having the space with you guys has empowered me to change so much, but it's also empowered me to show you guys what change is possible. Like, if any of you are here since the early days or you've watched my early videos, You can just see it in my energy. You can see it in everything, the way that I speak, everything. And so if that change is possible for me, it's possible for you. I feel like that's a part of my journey, is to just share this with you guys. And as I ascend now to another different energy and a different level, it's to show you guys that that's also possible for you as well. But in this growth and in this transformation, I've been losing resonance obviously along the way with certain types of connections. And I have never had in my life that big of a group where we were all on the same vibe. We all had pure intentions, hearts open. And it just brought me back to the fact that like we need that. Like we— it's not an option. Like we need each other because we are all parts little pieces, little fractals of the same source of God, okay? So we're part of Mother Earth, of Gaia, but we also are part of divine, divine spirit of source. And so each of us being a little fractal of source, a little, almost like a reflection of source. When you meet another person who's also embodied and who's on a, who's in resonance with you energetically, and you meet another and another, and then you're all in a group together, what you end up getting is this like beautiful mirror of the divinity within you, and a big one, because it's not just one person reflecting back to you, which yes, that is really powerful in itself, but it's like at that retreat it was like 100, and it was just the most amazing reminder of the, of the light that's within me actually, that I had become blind to. There were so many little things that I didn't even see, and then it kept getting reflected back to me in other people because I was seeing it in them and they were seeing it in me, and it was just so beautiful. And we need each other. Like, if we're all made of the same stuff, right? If we're all— if we're all God's children and we are all little tiny pieces of the energy of Source, of God, to be in community with each other and to be connecting with each other is the most direct way we can remind each other of that divine essence. When you're alone, the ego can come in more quickly depending on the connections. Now, if it's like a connection— what I'm talking about— intentionally, where you're working towards something with integrity and you know, you're doing inner work and you have an open heart. That's the kind of connection I'm speaking about. I'm not speaking about two egos meeting or five egos meeting or 10 egos meeting. That's a different energy, right? I'm talking about when everyone shows up as their best selves, as their most open and loving selves. That's where, like, the healing power of the divine can just kick into gear within each and every person. Because it's already there, it's already dormant. But as soon as it sees its own light reflected back in other people, it can really start activating and becoming more clear, and you can really start to feel more connected to that within yourself as well. So for so long, for the past 2 months, I've been scared, you guys. I've been scared. I got to play at a certain level on YouTube that I thought was my dream life for a few months, and then I freaking lost resonance with it, and it started to feel forced. And I have a rule, I do my best to not do things that feel forced because I know they're not aligned. And now it's getting to a point where I like physically can't do things that feel forced if they're not aligned. I just know, and I like, it pains me too much to do it. And so I've been changing the format. You guys have probably noticed I've been flowing more, but it's been scary, it's been difficult, and You know, I just want to remind you guys, like, a part of change and a part of transformation is allowing yourself to go through your seasons and allowing yourself to continue to let go of the old versions of you, no matter how much they have served you. So we did a practice on— I think it was day 2 or day 1, I can't remember— of the retreat where we were like removing these old masks, these old identities, and just saying goodbye to them and putting them in this like cauldron. And I took off like my— some of my old identity of how I show up on even on YouTube or how I plan content and how I make videos. And when she said to put that, put that in the cauldron, I was so upset. I was so sad because she Sorry, my heart is so open, so I'm getting really emotional. She, um, that version of me was the version of me that I dreamed of becoming for so long, and I thought I would just get there and I would get to just be her forever and it would just be so much fun. And it has been so much fun being her, and like, I can't even describe— it's just an energy thing. You can probably feel it if you're picking up on it, but just being like structured and going to the studio and having whiteboard videos and teaching like I taught every single week. That felt really fun until I lost resonance with this. It's almost out of my hands. It's out of my plan. I, I can't plan for how this is gonna go. But yeah, being that version, like, that version made all my dreams come true, made all my vision boards come true. And now it's so crazy because I'm at an intersection where, like, it's really not about me anymore. And that's the biggest thing that I had to realize. Like, on day 1, we did a lot of shadow work, and yeah, like I said, a lot of it I didn't, I didn't go that deep. I didn't get that much like other people in the room seemed to be getting a lot more release out of it. And I was so frustrated with that when I went home that night, and I was trying to accept and just surrender that it was what it was supposed to be because that's the truth. And the next day when I woke up I had this voice come into my head that said, Katie, at first I said, okay, it was exactly what it needed to be. It wasn't what I expected, but it was exactly what it needed to be for me. And then once I accepted that it was exactly what it needed to be, then I got the insight, which is how this— this is how the game goes, guys. So you have something you're resisting, right? Anything you're resisting, you have to like fully accept that this is actually the way that it needs to be. You may not understand why, you just accept it as it is. Then after the acceptance, you'll get the awareness as to why. So like a split second after I said, okay, yesterday the way that that went for me, it wasn't as deep as I thought, that was actually exactly what it needed to be, without me even asking why, this voice came into my head and said, so you could realize how much inner work you've already done. And I was like, oh, it was like— so you— it was kind of like, it wasn't like a clear voice, but it was like just a knowing of like, this happened so you could actually wake up to the fact that you've already released so much trauma, you've already released so much of your shadow, and you're ready to embody this next version of you. Like, you're ready to stop healing, you're ready to stop playing small, you're ready to start hiding in the safety of your old identity. You're ready. You don't need to keep looking for the reasons why you're not ready. Like, if there were reasons, they would have come up in this full day of meditation and shadow work. They didn't. Why? Because you're ready. And I was like, oh, right, okay, okay, it's me. I'm here. I've arrived. I've arrived. Okay, all right. So I got it, but it took a day. I got it. And then the second day was about stepping into your power, which was all perfect. That was exactly what I, what I needed. I'm not saying I'm fully healed, you guys. Like, there's still— the work is constant. It's constant. There's always other little bits and layers coming up, but I think my core big blocks that always held me back, a lot of them have shifted. There's still subtle layers, however, so I'm constantly, constantly still doing shadow work. Like, even this morning I had a meditation and I had to work with a part of me that felt like she, like like my inner child. She wanted an element of her innocence back. So this was like a core trauma that I'd worked on many times before, and I dealt with the hurt, the betrayal, the anger, the rage, the disappointment, the loss, the grief. I hadn't dealt with that little component though, and that's what needed to come out this morning. The way, the way you're gonna evolve— and this is just what I know as a truth now at the end of all of this— the way, the only way you're going to evolve is by turning inward, like fully inward, and tending to what's within you that's trapping your life force and your power and your clarity. Because this energy, like this divine energy, it's, it's all— it's you. It's what you are made of. It is literally you. You are God energy encapsulated in a physical form created by Mother Earth. How whimsical and magical is that? That's amazing. But you've got these stuck, these stuck energy patterns in your body, in your energy body, which by the way, you have a physical body and you have an energetic body. Your energetic body is just as real as your physical body, if not more real. So like all of these emotions and painful experiences and things that have happened to you in past lives, all of that stuff is stored and trapped in your energy body, and it's restricting the flow of life force, of creative consciousness through you. Okay, and so even if we look at the energy centers in the body, right, you've got your 7 chakras. You've got trauma— if you've got trauma's energy blocked in any of those centers, they're going to be out of whack, out of alignment, and that's going to cause skews in your perception, in your energy, in your state, in everything. And then in what, what you even see as possible in reality or for yourself, and how you even see yourself. Like, the whole thing is just going to be skewed. So if you're looking to transcend anything in your physical reality, you've got to transcend whatever it is within you that's resonating with that thing in physical reality. It's always, always going to come back to that. And I'm not saying it's going to be easy. It's not easy, but it is better. It is actually quite— it is a simple process. You know, you sit down and you close your eyes and you tune in. It's actually probably one of the most difficult things you'll ever do, but it's the most simple thing you'll ever do. That should tell you something. That means you should do it. If something is extremely difficult but simple, there's something in there for you. So meditating and going within and, um, like really tuning in and seeing where am I feeling pain in my body, where am I feeling tension, where am I gripping, what am I seeing in patterns in my life, and how can I tune into that and actually start to become aware of what it really is. You just have to open your ears, open your mind, and actually be honest with yourself about what it is that you have stored inside that needs to be addressed. And I've got so many videos now on shadow work, you guys, so you can go and watch those if you want a step-by-step guide on shadow work. But this is the work, like, this is what's important. And like, I know what I'm supposed to do is help you guys stop suffering, because human suffering, it's such a shame. It's such a shame, and this is coming from a girl who has suffered. You best believe I am no stranger to suffering. I'm no stranger to suffering, and now I'm grateful to say I'm no stranger to bliss and freedom and liberation and love, and it is possible. The world looks so different when you stop looking at it through your pain and through your trauma, and all it takes is some honesty. With yourself and some courage. And I want to just say as well, every single person who's on this channel and who's doing this inner work and who's doing their best to shift their energy and get in alignment with their truth, you are literally doing God's work. You might think it's not very significant, oh, just you, like in your journal, like reflecting on something or trying to break a pattern, and you might think, what's the point? There's a point. There's a freaking point, you guys. When you do the inner work on yourself, when you remove this darkness internally and you really start integrating and processing, and your energy starts to shift and you start to wake up and you start to expand Basically, your consciousness level rises, okay? It shifts, it expands, there's more. Like, you just become— your perception expands, you become aware of more, you start actually perceiving more truth, and you stop honing in on just illusion all the time. And then the veils of illusion start lifting, and you start to realize that fear is an illusion, lack is an illusion. Like, all of this stuff are really just illusions of the ego, and they're not really true. They're just a part of this material material gain and the material mass consciousness. But as you work on yourself internally and your consciousness starts to rise and expand, you inspire others without you saying a word, without you doing anything. You inspire others to expand and grow as well, even if you don't want to teach it. But I know a lot of you want to teach it, and a lot of you need to start just teaching it. You guys, I still have to work on my throat chakra. I'm still on YouTube. I'm still here. I'm still trying to be as raw and honest as possible. You, like, with the throat, you've got to just, you've got to just do it. You have to just speak. Your throat is a portal. Speak, child. Speak, speak, speak, speak. Whoever needs to hear that, speak. Start your YouTube channel today. Please let me know in the comments if you've done it, because I met some of you guys at this retreat, and yeah, and I've met some other people, and so some of you you want to start a YouTube channel and the world needs you to start it. Because basically, when you're doing the inner work and you're shifting your energy, and I don't care if you are not Gandhi yet or if you're not at Christ consciousness yet, it doesn't matter. Neither am I, you guys. That's what's so like— that's what people resonate with me so much about. Well, that's why people resonate with me so much, because I've shown it organically since like not day one, but definitely not since when I've accomplished a lot. Like, I started YouTube rusty, really, really rusty, and you being on this journey with me is what's made it so impactful for you guys, I believe. And so why don't you be that light for other people? Sorry, that was just a side note, but like, some of you, you're supposed to be a light for other people now, as you are now, and starting now is what's going to open everything up for you. So in any event, regardless of if you're gonna start a YouTube channel or not, but if you are, freaking start it, please. You, just by doing your inner work and by breaking your patterns and by choosing to respond instead of react impulsively, by choosing to shut down your judgment, your people-pleasing, your shame, your self-critic, like all of this ego noise and junk, you just doing that alone, even if you don't actively share it online or whatever else, you are healing other people around you. You are— your energy is contagious and it is impacting the people around you. And the more people who can transcend these lower states of consciousness and start rising up and rising up towards love and operating from the heart, the more the world is actually going to heal. So it's not a small deal, you guys. It's a really big deal, and everything you do matters because everything you see in reality, like all the, all the fear, all the pain, all the, um, like the, the structures, the way society is set up, the way fame is set up, and everything in this world that is so causing us so much destruction and so much pain, like that's all coming from the masses and the majority of the world being in a more destructive state of consciousness, being trapped in this ego state of consciousness. And we've come a long way. I'm not trying to be negative about it. We actually are, we actually are evolving constantly, so it's heading in the right direction. And I'm not going to be doom and gloom like a lot of people want to be doing. I'm not going to be doom and gloom. We've risen up actually out of the root, the root center. The root was the center of survival, right? So we started at these as these like primal primitive animals that were just trying to survive, and then it moved up into pleasure and satisfaction, the sacral energy center. Now we're in the solar plexus, which is the will and the achievement and validation from gain in the material world. And now it's time to move up to the heart, and that is where the healing begins. And so if you're on the journey of transcending the ego and transcending needing external validation, needing to outsource your sense of safety, you know, all of this stuff, if you're on that journey, you're doing your part in shifting actually the consciousness of the planet and healing so much more than you even think. So much more. Okay, and how you do that is you keep connecting to that divinity within you, right? It's not outside you. It is not outside you. I made a good friend this week. His name is Sam, and he reminded me that we are all children of God, not grandchildren. Someone said that to him, he passed it on to me. There are no grandchildren, there are only children. And so, you know, no matter what you've been through, it starts with you first. If you're opening up your heart center, no matter what you've done, no matter what you've been through, no matter what's happened, you have got to start loving and accepting yourself. Some of you are starving for love. You're looking for it in all this stuff that's not going to fill that void. That void gets filled by you giving yourself love and realizing that you have the love of the divine already within you. It's all right there. You just have to slow down and connect to it. So go outside, be in nature, close your eyes, go within, talk to yourself. You will find you have more answers than you ever realized. It's not going to be found out there. And so this is not woo-woo, this is the truth of who we are. All the spiritual texts allude to this fact. David Hawkins speaks about this, all the great spiritual teachers speak about this, the great authors speak about this. There is an infinite, loving, divine healing presence. You could call that God, you could call that Source. It's where everything and everyone came from. And the further you stray away from that, the more you're going to suffer. And so to bring it back to what I said earlier about suffering, you stop suffering by coming home to the truth of who you are. By reconnecting with the divine consciousness that created everything, that's making the wind blow right now, that's making my fingernails grow, that put this soul in this body, that created the mind, that created this camera. Like, get in tune with that. You are not just this meat suit. You did not just fall out of a coconut tree. You are divine, and if anything, I just want to send you so much love, and I want to remind you that you are so powerful, and you have the power in any moment to change how you're living your life, to change what you're focusing on, to change your reactions, and to start really going within and reconnecting to that power and disconnecting from all the things that you've given your power away to. You have that choice every moment of every day. I love you guys so much. I will be making some announcements probably in the coming weeks after I integrate everything, and there's some exciting new projects coming that came out over the last couple of days. It's been so cool with the theme of this retreat being rebirth. I was driving yesterday and I saw like a dragonfly and a butterfly side by side like this, like dancing in front of the car, and I was like Oh my God, it's just so cool. Also, my heart has never been more open, and I've just been having the craziest things happen with my heart center open. It's so cool, it's so cool. Um, but yeah, I might make another video about the heart center. I won't drag this one on into that because that's actually its own topic. Thank you all so much for watching. Thank you for showing up for yourself. Thank you for being here for the divinity within you. And by the way, if there's anything you resonated with or connected with in what I spoke about, that resonance is only existing because it already exists within you. So don't forget that. I love you all so much. I will see you in the next one.