The Integration Phase of Transformation, Explained

Hi everyone. Welcome or welcome back to the channel. We are outside today on my terrace that honestly needs a power wash, but we are just gonna rock with it. Feels like it's kind of stormy and it's about to rain, but it's perfect energy for what we're gonna talk about today. So today I really wanted to speak with you guys about a really important topic, and that is integration. And as always, I was reminded of the importance of this by going through it personally myself recently. And seeing clients and community members go through it as well. So integration is often one of the most difficult parts of a transformation. Any type of metamorphosis typically has a few different phases. The first phase, you could think of it like the initiation phase or the activation phase. That's where you suddenly become aware that you want things to change. You might start consuming a lot of new information. You might start actually making changes and your awareness in general is shifting pretty dramatically, pretty quickly. From there, you don't just become aware of a change or activate a change or start a change and then suddenly land into the fully embodied version of you who's living and breathing this new identity, this new awareness. From there, you actually enter what I call an integration phase. And I'm hoping the wind doesn't blow over my camera. Integration is typically the longest phase and it's the most difficult phase, and I often call it the training ground of the new self. So the integration phase is essentially like this visual I've drawn here. It's where you've exited the old energy, you know, you've become aware of your old way of being, your old habits, your old identity, and you've started to leave some of that behind, but you haven't fully arrived into the new energy yet. So you're not who you were, but you're also not who you want to be yet, or who you're becoming yet. You're in between, okay? This is you, you're in between, you're in a period of integration, and this is where a lot of people struggle. Because when our awareness shifts, when we become aware that we want to be someone else, we want to show up in a new identity, we want different results in our reality, and we don't have those results yet, we don't have that new identity yet, we don't have that new perception yet, it can be really frustrating because we want to take new action in alignment with our new identity or our preferred identity or a new awareness, but we don't have clarity yet on what that action is. You don't have clarity yet because you're not supposed to have clarity yet because you haven't actually fully integrated all of the changes that have begun in your energy, in your mind, and in your body. And so I want you to almost think of it like, almost like you're downloading new software into your system. Right? You don't just suddenly become aware of the old software, click on the new software, and then boom, it's done. No, you need some time for that to process and update and upgrade in order for all of the changes to actually take place. And typically, the most difficult phase of integration and the difficult part, the reason it takes so long, is because we have to integrate mind, mental awareness. We have to integrate energetically. We have to integrate emotionally, and we have to integrate physically, meaning our body needs to integrate the changes that have happened. So typically we, we make changes mentally. So our awareness shifts, we start thinking differently. We start putting our awareness on new things. We make changes energetically, but physically our bodies haven't caught up. To the changes. And this is the, this is the kind of step that feels really slow to a lot of people, and this is where a lot of frustration comes in. And then that's where dysregulation comes in, okay? So what you really want is to reach embodiment, okay? So embodiment is where mind, body, soul, energy, emotions are all fully aligned with this new frequency, with this new energy, with this new version of you. And when you reach embodiment, everything is aligned. So you know who you are, you know what to do, your thoughts are in coherence, your actions are in coherence, and your actions are an automatic byproduct of your embodiment. You don't need to think about how, you don't need to think about what step to take, you don't need to plan it out, you don't need to brainstorm for hours on end. You don't need to go back and forth with ChatGPT. You just know because you're embodied. So when you're embodied in a new energy, your frequency is going to correspond with the thoughts, the ideas, and the perspective that resonates with that frequency. Meaning you're just going to know the ideas. You're going to just have them. You're gonna know what action to take. Your body is just gonna start taking the actions naturally that's in alignment with your frequency. So you'll suddenly find yourself calling a particular person. You suddenly find yourself in flow state on that new project. Why? Because it's automatic. It's a byproduct of your embodiment, of your embodiment in this new energy. Let me give you an example. Let's say you're wanting to host healing circles for women, okay? And you realize that this is what you want to do. You've been doing all the inner work to become confident enough to do this. And you've started to accept that this is kind of your path and this is what you want to do, and you're showing up and you're trying to do healing circles in a particular way but doesn't really feel right, and you're kind of forcing yourself to figure things out and make a business plan and come up with a brand, blah blah blah, and you just can't seem to— you just can't seem to get it to click. The reason it's not clicking for you is because a part of your old identity, your old energy, is still kind of lingering around and you haven't fully arrived in the new energy of leader of healing circles, okay? You're not fully embodied in that new identity and that new energy. And so you need to give yourself some more space, some more time to process all the changes, all the new awareness, and really register them internally. And the moment that you do that and it all registers and processes and it fully lands, this energy fully lands as your new baseline and your new truth, It's the moment that you open your eyes one morning, you'll wake up and you will just know what date to host the next healing circle, what to call it, how to run it, how to— who to contact to set up the landing page or whatever it is you need to do. You're just gonna know. Why? Because it energetically resonates with your new embodiment, and you're going to show up to this healing circle and you're just going to know what to do because it's who you are. What you do is an extension of who you are. And so if you don't know what to do, you're probably in a process of integrating the new self. And so much of us suffer because we expect to arrive at clarity and embodiment when we haven't integrated the changes yet. So we're actually in integration and we're trying to force clarity, but clarity is not something you are ever, ever going to force into existence. Let me say that again. Clarity is not something you are ever going to force into existence. The more you try to force clarity, the more it's going to run from you. The faster it's going to run away from you, the further it's going to run away from you, the more you force it. And so if you feel like you're forcing, I want you to slow down and take stock of how many seeds of change you have planted recently. How many things have you gone through recently? How many experiences have happened that you have not given yourself the space and time to actually process? And this is only magnified by the amount of content we're consuming, by the amount of, like, dramatic things that we're seeing online that are triggering us emotionally, by the busyness of our modern lives. It's amplifying the lack of space that we have to integrate, and it's also creating this backlog of energies that are blocking our ability to actually process and integrate everything. So it's almost like you need to— you really need to come home to your body, to your energy, to your truth, and that's where you'll find clarity. But But so long as you're forcing and pushing and dysregulated and in fight or flight, you're just getting further and further away from yourself, from regulation, from your body. And until you come home, it's almost like, I don't know why this analogy is coming up, but it's almost like you are like this device, right? And you're out here in the world operating and your energetic battery is getting drained and drained and drained. And you're trying to push for clarity and figure out what to do next and how to be the baddest, most empowered, most wealthy version of you the perfect business plan, but you've disconnected from your truth. You've disconnected from the power source, which is you and your energy, because you're out here and you're dysregulated and you're running around, you're trying to figure everything out. And actually what you need to do is plug yourself back in to the power source, which is your core, your essence, which you find through stillness and space. And from there, it's like you put yourself on charge. Then you can start integrating and processing all of these changes, all of these things that have happened. You might need to integrate something that happened last week. You might need to integrate something that happened yesterday. You might need to integrate everything that's happened since you started on this self-development journey or you started on this journey of transformation, whatever journey that you're on, maybe your awakening. You need space to integrate that as well as integrating all of the day-to-day stuff that's happening in between, all of the little triggers, all of the weird interactions you might be having, having with your friends and family because you are changing and you're not your old self. Maybe the way someone looked at you when you were driving, maybe the way someone spoke to you at work. All of that needs to be processed and integrated. And from there, so when you sit down and you give yourself space and time to actually integrate and actually process and regulate your nervous system, that is when your consciousness actually reconnects with your physical body. Okay? And that's when the changes in your consciousness, in your awareness, can actually register in your physical body. And that is where embodiment begins, but it can't begin a moment before that. So maybe you have all the awareness in the world, maybe you keep learning and you know a lot of stuff, but you're not living the stuff. It's because you haven't integrated it into your body. Your body doesn't know it. Your body is stuck in the past because you are disconnected from your body because you're spending all your time in your mind, all your time running, forcing, trying to figure things out rather than just being. Being is the essence of regulation. Being is what reconnects you with the body. And until you reconnect with your body, you can't integrate any changes fully to the full extent. Okay, you have to integrate mentally, energetically, emotionally, and physically in the body. And the body is the biggest one that people resist because it requires you to slow down. But I'm telling you guys, I have been through countless transformation cycles. I'm being dragged into cycle after cycle after cycle after cycle. I've got whiplash from how many transformation cycles I've been through. And integration is non-negotiable. It is non-negotiable. I wish I could give you a magic pill to skip integration because yes, it can be very uncomfortable sometimes. But I can. And I think a lot of people come into this spiritual work and— sorry, the mountain just looks so beautiful right now. I'm just looking at a mountain out of my terrace. A lot of people come into the spiritual work and they're like, okay, I'm going to become awakened so that I can have money and I can be rich and I can be like all of these things, like I'm going to become spiritual, I'm going to change my identity so that I can have this, this, and this, so that I can stop suffering. So we kind of enter this journey of transformation, the spiritual work, the self-development, to, to get out of pain and suffering, not realizing that transformation requires a certain flavor of pain and suffering. Purification of illusions, purification of the self, of any fears, of any false limitations, of any false character traits. That purification comes with pain, because if something was stored with pain, it has to come out and come up with pain. And so if you've come on this path hoping to be free of pain and suffering forever, then I'm sorry to tell you that the path to becoming more aware, to becoming more free, to becoming more of who you truly are, is laced with pain and suffering because it's a path of purification. There's no bypassing it. And so part of integration is stillness, rest, which is really difficult for most of us. 80% or more of us are in fight-or-flight mode in our nervous systems, in survival mode. Rest and stillness is one of the most difficult things that many of us could ever do because it feels so counterproductive. And a lot of us have tied our worth and our value to our productivity. But it is absolutely necessary to integrate changes. The modern world does not hold space for how difficult, how draining, and how massive and how impactful energy work is, how real it is. But just because you can't see it doesn't mean it's not real. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean you can't feel it, and it doesn't mean that you should just bypass it and keep strong-arming through your life without holding space for it. It's almost like— so I just came back from— not just came back, came back a few months ago from a retreat in Sedona, but I'm still integrating it. That retreat was such a massive amount of energy work that it almost felt like I had energetic open-heart surgery. And so just because the world couldn't see that I had energetic open heart surgery, does that mean I'm not going to hold space and rest for that level of interference and upheaval that has actually happened? Just because it is energetic wounding, energetic transformation, energetic upheaval, doesn't mean it's not real just because it's energetic. It's just as real, if not more real, than as physical. So you wouldn't go through open-heart surgery, you wouldn't go through a car accident, you wouldn't go through upheaval in your life without taking space and time to process. And I invite you to have that same level of care with spiritual and energetic changes as you would if they were physical. So we live in a world that is very left-brain, very logical. It's focused on facts, on action, on tangible physical outcomes and results. So it doesn't hold space for the non-physical, for the energetic, for the unseen. If you view this channel, you know that everything that exists physically is birthed from the unseen plane. And don't you think it would be wise then to hold space for changes that are happening beyond the physical? And that is how those changes can actually process and actually land in your body. How can you know that you are in a phase of integration? So typically transformation starts on a kind of a high note. Like you start waking up to your power, to just new things in your awareness. You start to realize, hey, manifestation might be real. Hey, I might be able to change my circumstances. You start realizing certain things about yourself and about reality that you've never realized before. You start to wake up to your old patterns. You start to realize that you don't wanna be this way anymore. You wanna change and you start to change. And in the beginning, it's really exciting typically, and it's really, it's really empowering. It's really inspiring. And then what can happen is you get into a little bit of that in-between energy where you don't feel like your old self and you don't feel like your new self. That is how you know you're integrating. Okay, so as soon as you start trying to force clarity, as soon as you feel like you are slowing down but all you want is to just speed up and take action, as soon as you feel yourself flip-flopping between like the old self and the new self, the old self and the new self, or if you feel like certain triggers or emotions are coming up, you are in an integration phase. So purging is actually part of the integration phase. So one big component of integration is that need to slow down and create space. And then another part of integration is purging. Okay. Purging, we could call that a separate phase of transformation. In the past, I have separated out from integration, but purging technically is a part of integration really. And it's a part of integration because it is integration on the energetic level. It's integration on the emotional level. And so all the changes that— the seeds that you've planted for change and transformation, they're happening energetically and emotionally by pulling and uprooting anything that doesn't align with your new energy and with your new frequency. That is purging. That is your insecurities coming to the surface, your fears coming to the surface, being overly sensitive to things. And I will just remind you guys That is one of the most difficult parts of transformation. So integration in and of itself is challenging because you want to go but you can't. You want to have clarity but you don't have it. You want to move with all this new awareness and you understand why everything is the way it is, but you're just not seeing the results yet, and that is really frustrating. And within that, when you're purging, this is also a really difficult part of transformation. These are like the sticky points of transformation that people don't talk enough about, but I'm just going to let you know you're not crazy if this is what you're feeling, okay? It's part of the process. You are on the path, do not worry. Another really difficult part is when you're, when you're, when you're getting triggered by things. You're triggered and you feel bad and you feel emotionally off. Maybe you feel super insecure, maybe there's something coming up, it's just icky, you don't like it, you're in this weird energy. While you're in a trigger, oftentimes you won't know why you're in it. So again, it goes back to this not having clarity thing. The most difficult moments in the transformation journey are the moments where you don't have clarity, and those are the moments where you have to trust the freaking process. So while you're in a trigger, you're not allowed to have clarity when you're in a trigger because you're not supposed to intellectualize and figure it out, because that's going to take you out of actually processing the emotion. So like dealing with triggers, shadow parts coming to the surface, that is integration on an emotional and energetic level. And you know that it is because it's just happening, whether you like it or not, it's happening. And you have to just feel it and surrender to it. And when you accept it, feel it, and surrender to it, and don't try to intellectualize it and analyze it and make it make sense and figure it out, that's when you actually are able to process it emotionally and energetically. That's when the energetic cycle will complete, and then you will have awareness as to where it came from and what it is. But not while you're in it. You're not supposed to, because if you were to gain awareness about what it is and how it works and blah blah blah, it would stop you from actually feeling it, experiencing it, and processing it fully. So I just wanted to flag that as well. That's a part of integration, and it's a difficult part because you're moving through sometimes really ugly emotions and ugly things coming up, and you can't know why because you're not supposed to know why. But you will, so long as you just stay with it, let yourself feel it, and surrender to the process. You will get awareness at the other end of it. So in general, day to day, we need to create space and time for daily integration, and that will help us move through the different seasons of life and stay connected to ourselves and our truth just in general and keep us kind of in a state of balance overall, which cannot be overstated. Being in a state of balance is a superpower. So how you do that is silent meditation, unguided meditation. You sit down in the morning, preferably you close your eyes and you let your thoughts run and process and your awareness runs away with one thought. And then you notice it, you let it happen, and then you bring your awareness back to your body, back to the present moment. Then it runs away with another one. You catch it, you bring it back to your body, back to the present moment, runs away with another one. And people think you need to meditate to clear your mind and that it's like an active thing you do, like you go and you excavate and you clear your mind. No, you don't. Your mind clears itself when you give it the space to process everything that's been thrown in there and dumped in there throughout the day. Or maybe it's been the past few weeks, past few months, past few years. You might have a backlog of items that are waiting to be processed. And as soon as you give them the space to do that, it will just do it automatically. It just doesn't feel nice because you have this expectation that you should be levitating like a monk as soon as you sit down to meditate. No, my friends, no. If you just give it the space, you will process and your mind will take care of everything automatically. And so when people talk about getting into the void state, the void state is just what happens when you give yourself space to process everything that's there in your mind. And once everything is processed, you naturally enter the void state and connectedness to your subconscious, to yourself, and to your core. So daily silent meditation is the biggest tool for integration day to day, but especially if you're in an integration phase. You want to create more space than normal, more silence than normal to let everything process and let it all register and process and land in your body. The other thing you can do if you are in an integration phase is journal. So I want you to just think about like how busy our lives are and how much we go through, not even just energetically. So if you're watching this channel, you're probably doing a lot of shifts in your energy, which are really significant, and you need to hold space for those. But then in your life, like as you're gaining new awareness and you're going throughout your life and things are happening, those are important to process as well. Even just day-to-day life, you need to create space to process that stuff. So journaling is really, really key. You can write and just journal and say, this happened today, that happened today, this happened last week, it made me feel like this. And you're not trying to figure anything out, you're just helping yourself process everything. Okay. The other thing you can do to help yourself integrate changes so you can move into embodiment, which is where we all want to be, is spend time in nature. So I had a lot of things happen in the last few months, and I went to— I've traveled a lot. I went to Sedona, had some cool experiences there. I went to Japan, had some cool experiences there. I've had no space. So the last few days I have spent flat on my back on the earth. Because your body is made of the earth. So if you want to regulate and connect to your body, the greatest thing you can do is be with the earth, which is the mother of your body, because it will connect you to your essence, the essence of your physical body. But I've been flat on my back on the beach, in the garden, off my phone, just in nature fully. That will regulate you and connect you to your body more than anything else. And as soon as you get that connection back, integration becomes natural and easy. The other thing is to get off social media. So the last thing you need is more consumption and more input when you're integrating. You have enough information, you have enough awareness. What you need now is space to process. You might need extra rest. You might need to clear some things off your calendar if you can, and just give yourself space to listen to your body. When you feel ready, then you can start moving. You will know when it's time for slow movements, when it's time for faster movement, when it's time to take a step. And you will be taking that step from embodiment and from regulation. That's how you know it's aligned, and that's going to be the step that takes you to your most aligned timeline rather than the one that you're forcing out of fears and out of lack and out of illusion. It's almost like you need to get into this trust fall with the universe when you're going through a transformation process. Like, you're letting go of the old, but you're not fear gripping the new. That's trust. And if you surrender, if you fully surrender, surrender to the process, surrender to everything that needs to integrate, as soon as that new awareness fully lands and your energy fully shifts, you are going to know exactly what to do. The path is just going to illuminate. You're going to be walking it without even realizing that you're walking it. It's just going to be natural. You cannot enter embodiment in a new energy until you fully integrate that new energy, and that means sometimes slowing down. No, it's the hardest thing in the world to do, but this is a precursor, it's a prerequisite for embodiment. It's not optional. So if you're in an integration phase, if you're in this in-between phase and you've been putting all of this pressure on yourself, you've been forcing yourself to take action and get clarity, and it's just making you more dysregulated, more stressed, more disconnected, please take this as the biggest permission slip ever to let all of the expectations go, let all of the pressure go, come back into your body and give yourself space to process your changes. If you allow yourself to move from a place of integration and regulation and embodiment, it's never going to feel forced. It's going to feel like flow. It's going to feel like alignment, which is exactly how it should feel. That's it for this video, guys. I hope it helped. Please remember, you have got every single thing you need within you. To live the life that you came here to live. It's not going to be outside you, it's not going to be in some hack or in some video, it's within you. So all you have to do is let go of all the noise and tune back into yourself. I love you all so much, thank you for watching, and I'll see you next week.