Infertility Success Author Chats: Brandi Bunda

Hello. Hello. Thank you for joining us for Infertility Success author chats. I have contributing author Brandy Bunda here. She wrote a chapter called A Second Chance at Motherhood. And today we're going to talk about what that means to her. Hi, Brandy. Thanks for being here today.

Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be with you.

Yeah. I know that you were really excited to share your story in the book. Can you tell us a little bit about what writing this chapter meant to you?

Um, well, I really wanted— it meant a lot to me, to be honest. I feel really honored to be in this book because there's not really another one out there like it where there's so many different stories of challenges. Like, I had no idea. I learned so much from other women going through this book because, you know, I, I struggled with unexplained infertility. On paper, I really didn't have any reason why I shouldn't be able to conceive. And so to hear about all the different struggles that these women had was just astonishing. And, you know, part of me really also felt sad in another way because there are some things that once I sought assistance from a naturopathic doctor after struggling for 2 and a half years, she really helped to catapult me and made drastic changes in my life. And in the 6-month period that ultimately led to me getting pregnant. And it just makes me wonder, you know, there's so many women out there that maybe could possibly make some of these changes too, and just how impactful or what a difference it can make in their journey where they might not have to go on to seek, you know, medical assistance, you know. Yeah, that's really why— that's really why I wanted to share, you know, some of my stories so that I can help inspire and empower women to really help take more control or better control of their fertility health from the moment they decide that they want to have a baby.

Yeah. When you were talking, I just had like all over chills. Um, it's, it is really, um, a unique collaboration of stories, like you said, and from so many varied backgrounds. So you touched a little bit about what was going on with you, um, in terms of your challenges. Let's talk about that a little bit. Let's highlight that. Like, what— when you say unexplained infertility, that's the diagnosis. But leading up to that, what kind of symptoms were you having? What was going on with you?

Well, basically, once I decided that I wanted to have a baby and I got off my birth control, and basically I quit taking— I was taking a medication for like ADD and focus. And so those were the two things that I started to do, but I still had a plethora of symptoms and challenges that I was going through. So I struggled with gut issues. I had acne. My periods were irregular. I was anemic and I was having literally fainting. You know, I was fainting at different times. My two front teeth, just fun fact, are fake from a fainting incident. My teeth moved backwards and I had to push them back into the place and it, and it actually killed those nerves. Okay. Um, um, I was like low in B vitamins, vitamin D, um, my form, like my hormones were just all out of balance and I didn't know that then.

Yeah.

But even those things, those are all the things that are happening to you.

You're passing out. Like, how are you feeling? Like we, we find out, we're gonna find out right through blood tests that your B is low and this is low and that's low. But you're fainting, your periods are irregular.

Yes.

What else? How are you? How else are you feeling?

I was getting— I was having chronic headaches.

Acne, you said? Acne.

I was getting canker sores. I would, um, I was really tired. I would get fatigued easy.

Right.

Um, I had, I had gut issues. So on one end of the spectrum, I would either have trouble going to the bathroom or it would be, you know, really loose.

Sorry.

But you know, it was like I was having abdominal cramping and pains and bloating. And so for someone who's struggling with infertility, I looked at times like I was pregnant, which is a total mind mess. Okay. When I looked bloated, I looked pregnant, but yet I wasn't. So I know you can feel me on the— you're just so eager to take. And because my periods were irregular, I would be so eager, like, oh my gosh, I'm late a couple of days. And so then you're like really hopeful and you go buy a million different pregnancy tests, like the digital ones, the ones that aren't digital, like the different brands. And, you know, I mean, it's crazy. And that was constant. And so then that's an emotional— I was stressed, right? Um, at the time I worked, uh, I had a 5-state territory and I worked for a health and wellness company, and we sold nutraceuticals in the animal health industry, but we also sold supplements for people. So that's really what helped catapult me on making particular changes in my life. I wasn't getting that from my doctor. I learned a lot from our corporate trainer, actually.

Yeah.

And, and it was my job to go into veterinary hospitals and actually educate the veterinarians how they could use preventative health and wellness in the pet's life, try to get them maybe off medications and really use a multimodal approach. So I started taking that into my own life. And then 5 months into my fertility journey, my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. And so that was a really stressful and emotional time. That was the same year that, um, I had a miscarriage. And so after the miscarriage, that's whenever— and that was in 2012— and so really 2013 is when I started trying to do things on my own. And just started kind of researching particular things. And so I was trying to clean up my diet even more because I had done that on the cancer journey with my dad.

Yeah. Um, I was, I had, and previous to that, would you have said that you had a good diet? Like, would you have thought, yeah, I eat pretty well. Like, or did you know that your diet really needed addressed?

2000, when I started working for the, in the nutraceutical industry in 2010, that's when things changed for me. I mean, I worked out on the road and so I would go to like, I would find a natural grocery store and I would buy my food for the week as I stayed in a hotel in order to be able to try to make my food the best I can. Or I was eating, you know, I was hitting up the Paneras and the Jason's Delis. And so I had already started to try to clean up my diet. Yeah, it went full force when I was trying to help save my dad's life. And then I started exploring other things, using more supplementation. That was the same year that we were in introduced to aromatherapy and essential oils. And we started looking at the water we were drinking and the cleaners that we were eating because he had lung cancer. Or yeah, we weren't eating cleaners, the cleaners that we were using. Right. We started looking at those because I was looking at respiratory cancer, like what would have contributed. So I just became an investigator and really doing research on my own because I sat in the cancer room with my dad and I I heard the conversations that weren't happening there. I know the conversations that weren't happening in my doctor's office when I was struggling with all of these things. There was just, they wanted to write a prescription for a certain thing. And I really didn't want to go that route. I was trying to go the opposite direction. And so that's when I decided, was like, I really need to try to find somebody who views the body like I do. And that's when I found a local naturopath.

Yeah, that's amazing. And really all of these things in the end were what were affecting your fertility, right?

Yeah. Because it had a direct correlation and I had no idea.

Yeah. So what's your life like now? What do you have going on?

My life like now is I'm a mom of two. So after I sought help from the naturopath, she made drastic lifestyle changes. When you read my story, I go into, you know, detail about the different changes and stuff that I made. And 6 months later, we were pregnant. I went on to have a wonderful pregnancy and natural childbirth. I was able to breastfeed for over 2 years, and I didn't struggle with secondary infertility with my second baby. In fact, I was almost 4 months pregnant before I knew that I was pregnant the second time.

Wow. I don't think I've heard that part of your story before.

Yeah. Yeah. I was almost 16 weeks pregnant and I was like, what in the heck? Like, why am I not? I was giving up sugar and I was, you know, I'm like, why am I not losing weight? And yeah, I was, I was gaining weight and someone was like, uh, maybe you're pregnant. I'm like, no, I'm still nursing. That was the total myth that if you're nursing, you can't get pregnant. Okay. So, um, just know that in advance. Um, but anyway, so I was almost, yeah, I was almost 16 weeks pregnant, we go to the doctor and like literally there is a baby. You could see the baby.

Not a bean.

Ultrasound. Not a bean. It was a baby. Um, so yeah, I'm a health and wellness coach, just really helping to, you know, guide not just women on their fertility journey, but really in their overall women's health. I really want to speak to women and it's like, I don't— they say infertility, right, is whenever you struggle for at least 12 months without getting pregnant. So my advice, my greatest tip to someone who's like going through this is why wait if the time is going to pass anyway, right? Like why wait until you've struggled and you don't know why, especially if you have reproductive issues, you know, there's so many things that my doctor didn't ask about. Like, let's, let's try to figure out why you're having all these gut issues. Let's see if you have MTHFR, because something as simple as your prenatal vitamin can make a big difference. A third of women have Third of people have MTHFR. And if you're taking the wrong prenatal vitamin, you're actually, which I do have MTHFR. I know you do too.

Right.

And so if you're taking a supplement with folic acid and not folate, well, you're causing yourself a whole host of problems. And these are just conversations that aren't happening in doctor's offices. So I'm really helping to like change conversations that are being had to encourage and empower you to just take, um, more control of your fertility health from the moment you decide that you want to have a baby. And I've actually got a preconception checklist that has like 18 different tips that you can start. So if you're feeling helpless or hopeless, like there's nothing that you can do, is like, here's some things that you can do that are— that still— that was 2014, right? When I walked through that, it's 8 years later. And I, all except for giving up the coffee because I did have to give that up during that 6-month period when I went to go see, you know, my naturopath. And now I am still a daily coffee consumer, but all the other changes were so, they improved my life so much. I like how I feel now. It's so different than how I did then. And it changed the way I parent and raise my babies. I'm so much more intentional. Uh, with what we bring into our home, what we put into our body.

Yeah.

And you know, absolutely.

I'm so glad that you mentioned your, your free, um, checklist because that's actually available in the back of each of the chapters. Um, every contributing author, um, put a free resource and a way to connect. And so if you want Brandy's free checklist, when you purchase the book, if there's a QR code and you can just scan that and connect with Brandy. Um, the other thing that you said that I think is, is, um, profound is that— and I think that most of the authors would agree— that it has changed not only getting, getting to the success, um, and going through the infertility process has changed how we parent and how we view our bodies and how we view our health. And it's, it was for a purpose, right? I think that you would agree that the, the journey was for a purpose for you and for your kids ultimately.

Yes.

When people are frustrated with these lifestyle changes and they, they, you know, and I understand, I understand the frustration of giving up everything that you really want, coffee or wine or sugar or carbs or whatever it is, but Really, like, look at you. You're the picture of health. Your skin is beautiful. Um, you know, the outcome is over the, the goal is overall health and the outcome is pregnancy, right?

And yes.

And it's for your kids. It's for your kids too. If you can learn to do this for yourself to get to the point of pregnancy, then you have a whole nother set of tools. Look at all the tools that you have to share with your family. Yes.

And they emulate what they see, right? I mean, I have mom wins all the time when I hear my kids like turn around and either they're coaching me on something or we're walking like through an elimination diet right now with my son. He's 4 and he's having like some eczema flare-ups. And so he's asking me, mom, does this have dyes in it? Mom, I need an enzyme. Mom, you know, I mean, this is gluten-free and he's 4, but it's because I teach them and I talk about it and they know why. And I just kind of, I really want to inspire health and not only them, but just, I know it can be overwhelming. And when I go through and people like actually see what I did in such a short amount of time, I honestly sometimes don't give myself enough credit. And other people are like, oh my gosh, like that is, that is a lot. And I had help getting there. So Right. Another big thing is like, don't— you don't have to be alone to do this. Like, we both— you and I both help kind of guide and mentor, you know, women on their journeys. I'm working on some future resources that'll be available, like we can connect. Um, and so I'm just— I just pray. I just pray for the women out there that they feel guided to reach out to somebody in the book that they can connect to, even if it's just, you know, for a pep talk, for some good advice, or who knows, like a friendship, you know, might, might form from this because it's such like an intimate and personal journey that you go through and you feel like you're alone.

Yeah.

But infertility increases, are rising, and I really want it to go the other direction. So I really want to be a part of like a whole functional fertility movement. You know, where we, where we look at the body as a whole and not just a reproductive system.

Yeah. And not as our bodies being broken, but our bodies are communicating with us. They're telling us, yeah, these are all, these symptoms are all signals and signs that, um, you know, just like your, the proverbial check engine light on your car, right? It's really true. Like your body has the same kind of warning systems. What would you say to somebody still in the trenches, still going through infertility? Like, what, in a couple sentences, what would you say to them about keeping the faith and moving forward and taking some of these things and implementing them in their life? Like, how, how can you inspire them?

So I would, well, for one, I would say pray.

Yeah.

If you're a praying person, like Give it up to God. I know people give advice. It's like when you just stop thinking about it, when you just like forget about it, your body will relax and it will just happen. Have you heard that one? Because I did. And so it's like, but if you're, if the time, like I said before, if the time is going to pass anyway, like don't wait until you get to the 12-month mark, start making small incremental changes. It doesn't have to be dramatic or drastic like mine was in a short period of time. But even if you changed one one thing a month, by the end of a 12-month period, you can either A, be pregnant, B, be healthier so that when you do get pregnant, like, you have a successful and a healthy pregnancy and you feel good because you can feel good. You know, I did.

Yeah.

I feel really bad for the women who tell me that they, they hated being pregnant and they had a crummy, uh, pregnancy. I was just like, I wanted to be pregnant so much. Like, I don't Don't be mad, but I didn't even experience like morning sickness other than nausea, you know? So, um, I know that's not everyone's experience, but it was for me. And so I just want to say like, don't give up, have faith. If you're feeling helpless or hopeless, check out, um, the checklist so that you can start making changes. The time is going to pass anyway. And so just really try to help yourself increase and maximize your chances of conceiving, even if it's not naturally. I mean, sometimes I know that you weren't even a candidate, right, for IUI or IVF, and that's expensive. Like, they've made it really expensive to try to have a baby, right? You know, or, or even adoption. I mean, those aren't like easy processes, or they're really big life investments. And so if you can make dietary and lifestyle changes and really help to balance out your hormones and start checking the stuff that comes through your home and like what you're exposing yourself to and, um, what you're putting on and in your body and just different ways that you can support your health naturally, that might be all that your body needs to have a baby.

Yeah, absolutely. And it may or may not be instantaneous, right? The outcome is still gonna be that you're gonna be living a healthier life.

Right.

So you have nothing to lose. So, Brandy, thank you. Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead.

I was just going to say that, that even in some of the symptoms that I was experiencing, I wasn't necessarily contributing, contributing them to infertility. And over time, the more I learned and the more I researched, the more I realized that it was having an overall effect. So you might be thinking that what you're going through is, is incremental, or there's no direct correlation or connection, but it very well could be.

I'm really glad that you brought that up. Um, doctors can't fix everything. Sometimes you have to take these things into your own hands, do your own research, be empowered. And just because a doctor tells you that they can't help you, it does not mean that you cannot get pregnant. So Brandy, thank you so much for being on today and sharing your story. If you're looking for more stories like Brandy's, there's 20 stories in Infertility Success. Stories of Help and Hope for Your Journey. Check it out on amazon.com, and the link is in the comments.

Awesome. Thanks for having me.

Bye-bye.

Bye.