National Infertility Awareness Week

Hello everybody, good afternoon. I wanted to talk to you today about National Infertility Week, and before you think that this does not apply to you, let me just tell you that it certainly does. There are so many people in the world, 25% of the population worldwide suffering from infertility, and so this is why as a person that has been through infertility wants you to know, and probably what your friends that are suffering from infertility want you to know as well. So, um, if you don't know me, I am Erica Hoke. I'm an infertility mentor and infertility detective, so to speak. I help women go through the process of infertility and advocate for themselves in the medical world and kind of ferret out some of the things that are overlooked and that can help them on their path to conception and building the family of their dreams. So if you watch this video and you like this video and you want more of what I'm showing you today, then go ahead and hit that subscribe and that bell if you're on YouTube right now. And if you're not, um, look me up at Erica Hoke, um, first and last name on my YouTube channel. So let's talk stats. They're not sexy, but it's gonna give you a really good picture of what is going on. So 25% of the world population suffers from some form of infertility. In the United States, that's 1 in 8. 1 in 8 couples trying to conceive are suffering from infertility. In Canada, it is 1 in 6. In the UK, it's 1 in 7. So it varies a little bit worldwide, and I don't think that there's any hard and fast reason why that is the case. So, um, a lot about what I'm going to tell you today is for your friends. So before you say to yourself, well, I don't know anybody suffering from infertility, with those kind of numbers, it's almost certain that you know somebody. And it might be that person who you invited to your baby shower and said she was gonna come and just didn't come, or she sent a gift and, you know, and, and didn't— couldn't show up in person. It could be that person who, you know, you've just had a new baby and, you know, she's a really good friend of yours and she's not coming over to see your baby or what have you. There's a lot of behavior surrounding surrounding infertility that seems really hurtful to the people around them, but people are really private about this journey and they take on, unnecessarily take on, a lot of shame. And so a lot of them do not share with their families, do not share with their friends. They don't wanna talk about it. They don't wanna ask about it. And let me just tell you what that looks like. It means that you have coworkers that are hiding in the bathroom that have just gotten their period. That are devastated. It means that you have friends and family that are going through the physicality of doing injections, the expense of it, just the emotional roller coaster, and they're doing that without the support of people knowing because they just don't have the the energy to talk about it. So interestingly enough, male infertility is equal to female infertility, but more often than not, we make it a woman's problem, right? Because she's gonna be the one carrying the baby. So we think of— when we think of infertility, I think a lot of times that people think of just it's a female problem, but it's equally can be affected by males as well for a variety of reasons. And so just like you wouldn't want your girlfriend to discuss with you her partner's erectile dysfunction or something like that, we're not doing anybody any service of talking about, questioning people about this because it is a medical, it is a medical, Questions about fertility— and questions about fertility are medical questions, that's what I'm trying to say. Sorry, I was having a hard time spitting that out. Questions about fertility and reproductive, growing your family, those are medical questions. We think about it as a society as it being, um, the end result, which the end result is the baby. So all we're thinking about is, oh, I want to know if they're going to have a baby. There you're thinking about the baby, but you're not thinking about the pain that it could be causing somebody having that kind of conversation with them, asking those kind of really personal questions that it might not even be your best girlfriend. It might be her husband who has male infertility and she just can't have that conversation with you. So please, you know, when you're talking to people about their families, keep in mind that that's a medical thing and you wouldn't go, asking somebody questions about, again, like erectile dysfunction or something like that. So, um, this also includes secondary infertility, which is really confusing to people. So, um, secondary infertility affects a ton of people as well, and it's, it's almost like a lot of people in the secondary infertility world consider themselves like stepchild to people that have primary infertility because they already have a child. And so there's a lot of toxic positivity around that where, well, you have your one child, you know, you should be happy even if you can't get pregnant again. Oh well, just, you know, push, push your feelings aside. There's a lot of boundary issues with that where people are not allowed to grieve for that, that process of the secondary infertility as well. So, um, we talked about— we're talking about 4 tips today about like what people want you to know. Um, I'm just getting up my notes here so I don't get off track. Sorry. What infertility— what I want you to know, that's the National Infertility Awareness Week hashtag for the day, what I want you to know. So This is what I want you to know. It affects male and female, and then so a third equally, and then the rest is unexplained. Secondary infertility counts in that too, and most of that is unexplained. They've already had one child, they go to have a second child, um, and they can't. Um, questions about fertility are medical questions. Even though your intentions are good and you're just thinking about that beautiful baby that they're going to have someday, This is a medical topic and it should be avoided unless the person confides in you. Be sensitive to your friends, even if they don't verbalize to you, even if they don't come out and say, hey, this is why I couldn't come to your child's birthday party, your baby shower, or any other event. Just be sensitive to people that they are suffering in silence and they could be going through something you have no idea what they're going through. It's, you know, maybe in— out of respect for their husbands. A lot of times it's out of respect for their husbands. So, and if you have suffered from infertility and you want to share your story, drop some information in the comments. Just share a little bit about your journey. The more that we talk about it, the more that we have good communication about it, for the people that are on the other side or that are able to share, you know, what they're going through, for the people that can't, share your story. So again, if you are watching on YouTube, hit that subscribe and like. We're focusing this week in my Facebook group, Flourishing Through Infertility, on environmental toxins and how they affect your reproductive and your endocrine system. And how much they can come into play, especially if you have something like MTHFR like I do. That's a topic for another day, but they can really, really dramatically affect your fertility. So if you want, I'll drop the link— sorry, I'll drop a link in the comments for that group. So if you want to hop on over there, I'm providing that information. And then we've got a supplements class coming up too. Do. So health and blessings to you guys. Thanks for joining me today, and I'll see you next time.