How to WIN Any Deal in 17 Minutes | Chris Voss' Proven Techniques

Chris Voss shares negotiation tactics that flip conventional wisdom. Lead with your negatives instead of hiding them, ask "what" and "how" questions to give the other side control, and make them feel like they won. Real deals show how this works from construction contracts to hotel upgrades.
Chapters
Yeah, I'm gonna say, look, I'm sure it seems like I'm greedy here. If I say to you like, I'm sure I'm gonna seem very greedy here, that sets me up to ask for a lot of money because there's actually, um, science that backs this up now. Identifying a negative diminishes it every time. So if I'm going to make a big grab for the money you're going to think I'm greedy, and I need to get that out of the way. Because if I'm too greedy, you're gonna— you're gonna get some satisfaction by keeping me from the money, even if you don't get any, right? And so I'm gonna say, look, I'm gonna— I'm gonna seem real greedy here. I'm gonna seem like I'm very self-centered and that I'm greedy and that I'm not looking out for you at all. And I'll just let it sit, and you'll take a lot more from me a lot, a lot. You'll allow me to take more if I've said that in advance, up front, really, because I've diminished that. Your thought is like, I mean, how I can never seem too greedy then when I make that grab. You're going to say, well, he was honest with me, told me he wanted a lot of money. He didn't try to say, hey, look, let's do a win-win deal. Now give me all the money, right? Because if I say I want to do a win-win deal with you, I'm like, hey, I'm I'll be nice to you, I'll look out for you.
And then you try to take 90 and give me 10, it's like, no, it's not a good deal.
Yeah.
But when you say it up front, then you're more likely to get the deal.
Yeah.
And get more of whatever you want.
Right, I'm gonna seem very honest to you. You're gonna like that I was honest with you. And you're gonna say after the fact, like, look.
He was honest.
I always knew where he was coming from.
I didn't like the deal, but I did it anyways or whatever.
Yeah.
Huh, okay.
Yeah, it's crazy, that's just, This stuff that we found out that works regularly. We had to talk about another one we talked about in the book. There was a multimillion-dollar deal going down in Washington, D.C. The subcontractor was very unhappy with the general contractor and female negotiator and they were getting ready to lose everything and they sat down and they said, you know, I'm sure we seem like the big guy that doesn't care about you. I'm sure we seem like the big general contractors trying to take complete advantage of the sub and not appreciate how hard you're working for this and not care about your future at all. And she turned that deal around. When she was done, she took an additional million in profit for herself and her company, and the other side liked them more. So not only did they increase the profit, but they had a better relationship.
This is why being honest up front or empathetic, or I can see how you might feel that we're going to do this, the tactical approach—
there are negatives here We're going to address the negatives up front and we're going to make them go away. Yeah, address them up front. Most people don't want to do that. I already did that. Do you know when I did that to you?
When?
I've already done it. Remember when we talked about doing the one-on-one role play? Yeah, I said it was going to be horrible.
Oh, that's true. You said it up front.
Yeah. And I always, I always do that every single time the same way, because if you do the role play with me, no matter how it goes I, you know, you're going to feel like you were beaten, beaten up, right?
But at least you told me I was going to be, right?
And you can't come out— if I say it's going to be horrible, you know, you can't ever say, well, he sandbagged me, you know, he caught me off guard, right? And then, then what I always do, then I diffuse the negative and then I pitch the positive. And most people pitch the positive and hope the negative will go away.
They sandwich the negative, positive, negative, positive.
I don't like sandwich at all.
Start with the negative.
Start with the negative. And I said And you will learn more than anyone else.
So how do you do that in a business deal where you start with, okay, I'm sure you think we're horrible, we're trying to get more than we should, or—
well, you know, walking to the table, you can make a really educated guess on what the other side is going to think of you. If you're a big, big business dealing with a small business, if you're David and Goliath, you know that before you get to the table, right? Flip side around, if you're new to the industry and you're trying to work your way into the industry, how do you look to somebody who's been in the industry? You look like an intruder. You know, I'm sure I look like an intruder. I'm sure I look wet behind the ears. I'm sure I look like I don't have any experience in this area, because if I'm new to the industry and I'm talking to somebody who's been in the industry for a while, what I want is money you've got. I want a piece of your pie. It's a nice big pie here, and I want to take a big bite out, right? If I'm new to the industry. And so, and, and you— it doesn't take a genius to talk it through and go like, yeah, somebody who's new to the industry is trying to hammer their way in. They got no respect for people who've already been there. And I'll say that, you know, I'm sure, I'm sure I look like an intruder here.
So how do you— how do you frame the positive afterwards then? You go, I look like an intruder, but—
and then I'll say, and there's money to be made here that wasn't there otherwise. Because if I'm new to the industry, especially if I'm bringing a deal in, I'm bringing you found money. The worst thing I could do is say, hey, look, I got some found money for you, right? Let me bring this to you. Sure, you're going to be like, you ain't bringing me nothing, I'm fine, right? I could pay my bills before you walked in the door. I don't need you to pay my bills. So, but I want to make that point. So I'll— I got somewhere I'm going. I'm going to say, you know, I'm sure I look like an intruder, I'm unappreciative, I'm wet behind the ears. You've been here for 1,000 years, you know, I don't know anything.
So always lead with the negative or the elephant.
Identify the elephant in the room. That's exactly right.
Does not be negative, but, uh, the elephant in the room, identify it.
That elephant always gets smaller every time you call the elephant in the room out again. And there's a subtle difference too. I never deny it. Like, if I— if there's a difference between me saying, I'm sure I seem like an intruder, which is good, and if I say to you I don't want you to think I'm an intruder. That's a denial.
That's going to say I am an intruder. Yeah, in your mind. Yeah, I'm coming into this new— I'm coming to this.
Yeah, denial magnifies negatives. The subtle difference between denial and observation. And if I say, look, man, I don't want you to think I'm an intruder here, I don't want you to think I'm way behind the ears, that I don't know what I'm doing, immediately you're thinking that. 'Cause I denied it. And that's why, and that subtle difference is night and day in negotiations. That subtle difference makes all of it. I had, I'm doing, when I'm working on my book deal, I don't know if my agent will listen to this or not, but I used this with my agent one time because I'm a bad client if somebody's negotiating on my behalf because at some point in time I'm gonna jump in with no warning, of course, and not listen to you.
This is how it's supposed to be done.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can— I can only sit back for so long. And so I'm getting ready, I'm jumping in the middle of this price negotiation with a potential writer.
Oh, with the writer. Okay.
You know, before I came across Tahl— Tahl is a superstar. Yes, he is the best business book writer on the planet.
He's great.
And, and so before I came across Tahl, we're working with us trying to get something going with another guy and I jumped in in the middle of it with no warning, without telling my agent. So I did it in an email, and then I constructed an email to my agent at the same time. Now, if somebody's supposed to be keeping their mouth shut in a negotiation, the name you might call them might be a loose cannon. Okay, somebody who pipes up when they're supposed to shut up.
Sure.
And they don't check with anybody else. Loose cannon. So I said— I craft an email to my agent at the same time And I, and at first I wrote it wrong the first time. I'll admit I said, I don't want you to think I'm a loose cannon. And then I went back and edited it and I said, I'm sure I seem like a loose cannon.
So he couldn't deny it, right? You weren't denying it. You were—
but this is a predictable negative.
Sure.
Seemed like a noob. I said, I'm sure I seem like a loose cannon. Sent him the email. As soon as he read it, he sent me back, I know I don't. I always respect a bold move. Wow. So I'd call the negative out. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out and just call it out, identify the elephant in the room, don't deny it. If I say, no, that— there ain't no elephant in the room. Rabbi, yes there is.
Sure.
And, and he has responded immediately.
Were you part of negotiating the— with the publisher as well?
When I say no, said and done. Um, but I'm gonna need to explore every option there. I mean, I don't Hearing yes is a bad thing to hear.
So don't say yes.
Yeah, yes in and of itself, I would much rather say, you know, okay, I'll do it. I love to say you win. 'Cause when you win, you're gonna perform. Yes is nothing without how. I need you to perform at a top level. You perform at a higher level when you feel like you win. If you look at me and we make a deal and you say, "Okay," well, that's a resigned okay, and we're gonna run into trouble when we go to implement, 'cause the minute anything bad could happen by your inaction, you know, there's a phrase, "Never be mean to someone who can hurt you by doing nothing," which nearly everybody can hurt you by doing nothing. [Speaker] Right.
So saying, "Okay, I'll do it," Right. Or yes, you win. Or you win.
Right, right. I want you to feel like you won.
You win. So you got the better end of the deal.
Yeah. Because are you going to hold to the deal if you got the best end of the deal?
Of course.
You love it. You can brag about it.
Awesome. Yeah, I got the better end, huh?
Right.
So you win. Okay, I'll do it. You win because both of them together.
If I say it, that's good because you won. If you say it, it's bad to me because you feel beat. I don't want you to feel beaten.
Right, right, right.
Which is one of the real big problems with negotiation because since I've been helping people get better at it, like I get more stories. A guy says, let me tell you about this deal. I had them over a barrel. There was nowhere for them to go. You know, for all intents and purposes, I took them hostage. Well, I guarantee you that the person they beat was, as passive-aggressive as possible on the implementation of that deal.
They didn't feel good about it.
Money on the table.
They didn't feel good about it, right? Huh.
Right.
So always make the other person feel like they got the better end of the deal, right?
Right.
They won.
And yeah, they won, and it was their idea.
It was their idea. I like your idea, I'll do it. Something like that.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah. I mean, that, that's really good. And so that's why the one— usually the one-word answers of yes and no Those are also frequently misunderstood too. You know, there's 3 kinds of yeses. There's commitment, confirmation, counterfeit. And most people are used to getting lured into a trap with yes. You know, would you like to make more money? Is it true this is the off-season? You know, whatever setup yes there is.
Would you like— okay, yeah.
You know it's leading someplace.
Yes.
One of my students is on a honeymoon and he's wanting to get an upgrade on his bungalow and it's the off-season in this resort. Now what they typically do is they cut prices on their basic rooms, but not the honeymoon suites. But not the honeymoon suites. Right. But he knows they're all vacant. Now he doesn't want to cut price on a regular room, he wants a honeymoon suite. And he starts out the conversation with like, you know, isn't it true this is the offseason? The general manager knows there's a trap there.
So what'd you say?
And so the guy starts going sideways on him immediately. Oh, really?
He didn't say yes, right?
He didn't want to say yes because he knows that yes is commitment and yes is probably a trap. And he knows, I don't know where you're going with this, but you're going someplace.
That's what he said.
Yeah.
And then what happened?
Well, and so then my student realized that, you know, he fell into this yes trap thing. So he had to kind of get back out of it. And they started talking, and instead of trying to get yeses and nos out of him, he started describing the situation. He started showing him a little bit. Yeah, well, I'm sure, you know, a lot of guys like me come in, we want a room, we don't want to pay anything for it. You get so many tourists that are in here in the off-season, and they're cheap. That's why they're here in the offseason anyway, 'cause they're cheap to start with. They don't wanna pay anything for anything anyway. And now the managers appreciate where the guy's coming from. He ends up—
So leading with the negative.
Right. He ends up getting the upgrade. Really? Yeah.
Free, 'cause he built a relationship and—
Yeah, the guy's got an empty room.
Yeah.
Never be mean to somebody who could hurt you by doing nothing. Not giving you the empty room is doing nothing. You know, you want this guy to give you a favor, and he doesn't own the hotel, and those rooms are normally vacant anyway. So his owner, whoever owns the hotel, they're not mad at him because those rooms are empty. They expected them to be empty.
Yeah.
So he's got options. You know, ultimately you want to make the pitch like, you know, you give me that upgrade, I'm going to be a fan for life.
I'm going to tell everybody, I'm going to promote it, tell all my friends about this. Something I've done For like the last 10 years, a friend of mine told me this line that he's like, you know, if you ever want an upgrade, if you ever want like something better in the deal, use this line. And I swear I've been using it. Maybe it's been wrong, but I'd love your opinion.
All right.
I say, what's the chance you can help me with this?
All right, so that's a, that's a what question to start with.
What's the chance?
Two things about that that I like. Um, first of all, it's a what question.
Yeah. And secondly, um What's the chance you can upgrade me?
You're elevating the person when you're asking for help.
So you're giving them power, right?
Right.
The opportunity to have power.
Right. Yeah. So there's— and I don't know that I'd change that sentence at all. I might say in advance, like, look, this is really going to seem greedy of me. You know, because you can't—
Leading with the negative.
Leading with the negative. If you try to call out a negative that's not there, you won't plant it. If you try to deny a negative that's not there, you plant that baby. That's why you have to know the difference between a denial and a straight observation. And those— that's a subtle difference because you're good. You're probably going to want to say before you ask a guy for a discount, you're probably going to say, this guy's going to think I'm cheap and I'm greedy. I don't want him to think that. So if you mention it at all, you got instinct to say, look, I don't want to— I don't want— I want you— I don't want you to think I'm cheap and greedier. That's a denial. That plants it.
So I bet you might think that I'm being a little greedy.
Sure, I'm sure it's coming across.
I'm coming— I'm being greedy. But what's the chance you can help? You can upgrade me? Yeah, yeah, you can support me in getting up.
And so if you're— if asking for an upgrade as a human being, the guy's good. No, that's not greedy. You want them— you want them thinking no. You want them saying no. No is a great answer because when somebody says no, they have just protected and defended themselves. Like it's ridiculous. The most ridiculous question that they would never say yes to. Like if at the end of a negotiation, if I can't— if my— one of my last things I'm always going to say is like, if you can't budge at all, I'll say, all right, well, look, it seems like you're powerless here. Oh, because nobody wants to say yes. Oh wow. Seems like there's nothing you could do. It seems like you're completely powerless here. And they'll put you on hold. They'll find a way to help.
So it seems like you're powerless. You can't help me. It sounds like you're powerless here, right?
Nobody— everyone say yes to that.
Wow, that is powerful.
Yeah, yeah.
Do you use that a lot when you're at the end of any phone bill or anything or something?
At the end of any deal, if we haven't come to an agreement that, that I'm happy with, that'll be the last thing I'll say. It seems like there's nothing I could say. And it seems like you're powerless.
It seems like nothing that you could say to them to get what you need, right, or for them to move the deal points. And it seems like you're powerless, right? They're powerless, right? Holy cow, that's powerful insight.
So yeah, we— a lot of people have cut deals by— they thought it was completely in the tank, and they're actually just trying to end positively. It's really— it's critical to end positively.
So give me one little extra thing then, if you know They want to end positively, not like, yeah, I'm powerless here, so let's do the deal.
Yeah.
Okay, I'll throw in this, or I'll give you this, or—
Yeah. Like, I make it a regular part, like my credit cards, almost all of them got fees. And I call every year and ask them to waive the fee. And they almost always do, until the guy says, well, we waived the fee on you the last 5 years in a row.
So it sounds like you're powerless here.
And I'll say, yeah, I'll say that. I'll say, it sounds like you're absolutely powerless here. It sounds like you're nothing. Nothing you could do. And they'll put me on hold.
They said, let me see what I could do. Anything.
They'll come back and do it. 'Cause nobody wants to be powerless.
Oh wow, that's great.
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