Tony Robbins on Confidence, Self Belief, Self Esteem, Shy People, & Deciding to Be a Fun Person!

If you're looking for ways to create massive confidence and want to learn from the master himself, Mr. Tony Robbins, then this video is for you. What's up, Believe Nation? It's Evan. My one word is believe, and I believe in you. I want to see that amazing thing that you have inside you be unleashed onto the world. And I started the Mentor Me series to try to learn from people who've done more than us so we can learn from them, aspire to be similar to them, get some of their beliefs, their value system, their mindset, their work routine to ourselves to help us be the best version of ourselves. So today we're going to learn from Tony Robbins on how to create massive confidence. Mentor me, Tony.

All of us have, um, uh, kind of an identity for ourselves, a way of defining ourselves. And human beings don't usually stray from that. So if you consider yourself to be a conservative person or a shy person, I know the way you move to some extent. I know the facial expressions, the gestures, the way you use your body. And it's all consistent with the fact that human beings, our strongest drive is the need to stay consistent with how we define ourselves. If your self-definition is, I'm a situation where I'm kind of, what was the word he used? Shy. Shy. Then you're gonna find a way to get to a place where you kind of cower back. Right. The fastest thing you could do to change your experience would be to create a new little thing, a simple thing like erase. The minute you go, "I'm shy," you go, erase. That's a BS story. BS meaning belief system. Okay? That's just a story. And if you tell yourself a story long enough, you start to believe it. Once you believe it, you act like it. When you calling yourself shy, you believe it. You go, "Tony, I've always been shy up until this moment." Do something that's completely outside what you would normally do, something Become somebody else. Decide who's the most playful, passionate, outrageous, fun person you know and behave like them for 2 or 3 days. Just push yourself to behave like that. And here's what's happened. It'll be shocking, you'll be weird, you'll be different, you'll feel uncomfortable, but after a while you'll get reinforced. It's like if you get a nice haircut, you make a change in the way you look, people will compliment you. You'll get some compliments and those compliments will make you want to use those other parts of yourself. We all want to be able to change the way we feel. That's what I spend my life showing people how to do. And what most people don't know is emotion is created by motion. The way you move determines the way you feel. You have 80 different muscles in your face, 80. For most people, this is the largest area of unemployment in the country. They use their face the same way, they feel the same emotions over and over and over again. So what I was saying is I have this deal with myself called priming. Every day I say, look, you gotta have 10 minutes for yourself. If you don't have 10 minutes for yourself, you don't have a life. And I'm not gonna hope I feel good. I just got back from 6 countries in 12 days. I was in India 2 days ago. Wow. I woke up here wanting, like, feeling like somebody ran me over with a truck. But you got yourself psyched up. But the way I did it is I do this process and it's 10 minutes. I put some music on, I do this massive change in my breathing so it radically changes the way I feel. And then I do this 3-step process. First, I do 3 minutes of gratitude where I think of 3 things I'm really grateful for and I associate, I don't think of it over there, I feel it. And the reason is when you're grateful, you can't be worried. You can't be fearful. When you're grateful, you can't be angry. And anger and fear are what screw people up most in their relationships, in their life, in their business. So I wire myself. I was saying to you that most people want to be happy, but their habit is to be worried or pissed off or frustrated or stressed. And so they've got a highway to stress and they got a dirt road to happiness. So I wire myself. I've got a highway to gratitude, which changes all your emotions. And then I do a 3-minute process of kind of a prayer for my family and friends. And then I do a 3-minute process of the top 3 things I want to accomplish. I see it as done and I feel it. I'm done in 10 minutes. So sometimes I go 20. But my deal is 10, so there's no excuse not to do it. Most people have a belief about what their real potential is no matter what you tell them, and that affects how much action they take, and of course that affects the result, and then ironically, that result reinforces their belief, and then that belief affects it. So I'll give you an example. Let's say a person has unlimited potential, we all agree, but they take little action, little results, why? 'Cause they have to start with a problem with their belief. They don't believe it's really gonna happen for me. Maybe for Frank Kerns 'cause he's got the cool hair and stuff, or maybe it's for you because you're so driven, but it's not me. Maybe Tony Robbins 'cause he's a freak, got these big teeth. Whatever their thought process is, right? They got this thing, right? But what happens is, if you believe that there's very little potential, how much action you gonna take? Nothing. Nothing, little. And when you take little potential with a little action, what kind of results do you get? Lousy little results. And when you get little results, what does that do to your belief? You go, "See, I told you this was a waste of time. Told you this wouldn't work." And then what happens? You tap even less potential. You take even less action. You get even worse results and your belief gets even weaker. And this sucker feeds on itself until you are in a downward spiral. [Speaker:EVAN_CARMICHAEL] It's poisonous. [Speaker:MARK_MILLER] It's poisonous and it's self-fulfilling. Now what if something could happen that could come along and fill you with a sense of absolute certainty? Not like, "I believe," but mean where you know In you guys' case, mine as well, we knew 'cause we had to. 'Cause we burned the boats, there was no other option. We had to find a way. We weren't gonna live that way. We all did it in different ways and for different reasons, but in essence, that was it. If you get yourself in a state of certainty that this is gonna work, 'cause I'm gonna find a way, and if this doesn't work, I will make the way, then you tap a lot more potential. And when you're certain in your potential, you take massive action. When you take massive action, you really believe in something, Great results. When you get great results, your brain goes, "See, I told you I was a stud. I told you this thing would work out." Now you're even stronger. You tap more potential. Take greater action, greater results. That's how you went from $300 in a week to $2,500 in 5 days to $100,000 in a month to $1 million in a day. Same thing with you. And we get momentum. That's why the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Now some people go out and they go, "Well, I'm gonna take a bunch of action, all right? I'm gonna open this product. I'm gonna try it." And they'll say to you, I even did it. But it's like a salesman who goes and knocks on the door and he knocks on 100 doors and says, "You don't want one of these, do you?" Yeah, exactly right. And even if he doesn't say it verbally, his face says it because he doesn't believe it's gonna work. So his voice, his body, the execution is so weak. Maybe if he talks to 100 people, somebody's gonna buy out of pity. They don't want his kids to starve, right? But he's not gonna get the result. So the core difference in people is how do you produce certainty when the world isn't giving it to you? You go out and you try and you try, and your case, you're $100,000 in debt and nothing's working. How do you keep yourself going? The way you did it, the way I did it, the way you're doing it, we may not have done it consciously, is we didn't change our potential that was there. And it wasn't even taking more action. Taking more action with a belief it's not going to work, it's not going to change anything. We got results in our head that made us feel certain as if it had already happened. I want to show you what you can do with just focus. Try this for a moment. I'm going to give you a test. Sit up in your chair with some energy. Make sure your buddy next to you is in a strong state. If otherwise, adjust their state. Come on, change their physiology. Whatever they got to do. See if they're ticklish. That might help. Now do this. I want you to look around this room right now and find everything in this room that you can find that is brown. As fast as you can, look for brown, look for brown, look for brown, look for brown. Look around you. Look for brown, look for brown, look for brown. Okay, close your eyes. I'm going to give you a test. With your eyes closed now, Shout out loud everything you saw that was red. If you see a lot more brown right now than red, say yes. Open your eyes, look for red now. I want you to really look for red. Look for red, look for red, look for red. Anything you can find that's red, look for red all around you, look for red. Raise your hand if you found more red this time and say aye. Aye. Why did you find more red this time? 'Cause seek and you shall— that's right. Whatever you focus on, you're gonna find it. In fact, let me tell you something. You'll even find it when it's not there. How many saw Burgundy called it red just so you could have more things you counted? Raise your hand. Say aye, come on. See, whatever you're looking for, you're gonna find. So if you wanna change your life, my friends, you gotta change your physiology and you gotta change your focus. By the way, how fast can you change that stuff? How fast, my friends? How fast? How fast? Come on. In a heartbeat once you re-change your conditioning. It's all you gotta do. And you can do it fast. You can do it with a question or two. Try this right now. Answer this question in your mind and be honest. What in your life today, if you wanted to be, could you feel proud about right now? If you wanted to feel proud, if you didn't feel like, "I shouldn't be proud." If you wanted to feel proud, what could you be proud of in your life today? Your children, your health, your body. Is there a problem you faced? Instead of running from it, you finally stepped up and handled it. What could you feel proud of in your life today if you wanted to feel proud? How many can think of something? And when you think about this thing you're proud of, what about that makes you feel proud? What do you focus on that makes you feel proud? How do you breathe when you really start to feel proud? What's the kind of look on your face that starts to happen when you let yourself feel proud? Yeah. How's that feel? Hmm. Think of another area of life. Think of an area of life that you're grateful for. Or you're You go, "I'm not grateful." If you wanted to be grateful, what's an area you could feel grateful for? What could you feel grateful for if you really wanted to feel grateful? How many can think of something you can feel grateful for? Let me see your hands. And what about that are you grateful for? What do you focus on that makes you feel grateful? How's it feel when you're really, truly feeling filled with gratitude? Here's one. If you wanted to be excited about your life right now, and you were willing to be excited, you were willing to buck everybody else's trend, what could you feel excited about in your life if you wanted to feel excited? What could you get excited about if you really focused on it and you really took it in? You weren't in a negative place. What could you get excited about if you wanted to be excited in your life? What could you get excited about? How many of you can think of something you feel excited about right now? Raise your hand, let me see your hand. Say, "Aye." When you're really excited about it, what about that excites you? Or when you're really excited, how do you feel? How do you speak? What's your life like? By the way, when you're excited, does it tend to touch other people, yes or no? Absolutely. By the way, do people have a tendency— who feels different right now than just even a couple moments ago? Raise your hand and say, "I." Why? Because focus is controlled by questions. If you ask a different question continuously, not once, continuously, you will get a different answer. If you ask a lousy question, you get a lousy answer in a lousy state. Somebody says, "Why does this always happen to me?" It doesn't always happen to you, but the brain's like a computer. Ask it a question, it'll have to come up with an answer, because you deserve it, you idiot. Someone will say, "How come I can never lose weight?" You can lose weight, but if you keep saying, "How come I can never lose weight?" the brain's got to come and answer. It goes, "You're a pig." Lousy questions create what? Lousy answers. Ask a better question, get a better answer. Now here's what I want you to get. I want you to get that you can change your state. How fast, guys? How fast? How fast? And if you get the habit of doing it, you'll have a different life. Emotion is created by motion. If you want to change the way you feel, have you ever tried to do it with your head? I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy. Your brain goes, BS, you're not happy. But if you change the way you move your body radically enough, your voice, your face, your movement, your biochemistry changes. It's not a pump-up. It's a true biochemical change. So what I'd like you to do in your chair, Create more energy than you had when you're standing. That means you got to wake up your row. Whatever you got to do, use your voice, use your body. Go wake them up, wake them up! Come on, wake them up here! Come on now! Oh! That's it. Now don't let it go. Sit up in your chair. Show the people beside you what a peak state looks like by your example. Just show them. If you find your passion, you're going to have this tremendous energy. It's sustainable energy. But momentum requires you always do the next thing to keep the momentum going. And the reason you get yourself in a passionate place is so that you change your life, and the only thing that changes your life is making a decision. So while you're in this passionate state, that's where you make decisions. You don't make decisions when you're like, "Huh, I don't know, what do you think? Alright, let's decide." If you make a decision in a state without momentum, if you make a decision from a place where there's no passion, you are not gonna get momentum. It'll kill momentum. It's decide, commit, and resolve. Some of you in the past, you've gotten momentum, you've gotten passionate, you've even made a decision, but a decision is the first step. Decision is like a war. I gotta do this or that. All right, I'm gonna make myself do this, but commitment is when you now, after you've decided, you commit to do this for the long term. Whether it's hard or easy doesn't matter. You're doing this. It takes it from this moment and it carries it into the future even when things are difficult. And the third state is resolve. Resolve means it's done. It's like it doesn't even— if you took action, it's done inside you, so it's done out there. There's no question whatsoever. Then once you decide, the only way the commitment and the energy and the momentum continues is if you take immediate massive what, my friends? Massive what? Write down in your notes, massive action is the cure-all. Massive action is the cure-all. If you're having a difficult time with something, your relationship isn't where you want it to be, your finances are not where you want to be, your body's not where you want to be, your business is not where you want to be, you need to take massive action. And if that doesn't work, try something else. If that doesn't work, try something else. Keep going with massive action and you will find the way because it will give you momentum.

So thank you guys so much for watching. I hope you enjoyed. I'd love to know, what did you think of this video? What clip resonated the most with you? What are you going to immediately apply somehow to your life or your business? Leave some love down in the comments below. I'm looking forward to hearing from you. I also want to give a quick shout out to the Essatino Artist. Thank you so much for picking up a copy of my book, Your One Word, and doing the review on your YouTube channel. I really, really, really appreciate it, and I'm so glad you enjoyed the book. I just finished Your One Word by Evan Carmichael, Evan's latest book, and I have a lot to say about it. So thank you guys again for watching. I believe in you. I hope you continue to believe in yourself and whatever your one word is. Much love. I'll see you soon.

So let me give you the one, one secret to happiness. One word. This is all you need to be happy. The most important It's the most important word ever. If you had to think of one word that's most important to you or that sums you up or that would be kind of like a little beacon.

Hey, Believe Nation, if you want to know what the most important one word is for Tony Robbins, Gary Vaynerchuk, Oprah Winfrey, will.i.am, and Howard Schultz, I have a very special secret video for you. Check the description for details.