#432 Things You Can Do With Flow Series: Solve a Difficult Problem with Flow

Flow Dreaming.

It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect.

The fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your Flow does.

It gives you a feeling of power.

Again in your lives.

Oh my God.

You were so on target. You are so amazing. I can't thank you enough.

Breathe.

It is the feeling that you bring forward. It is your emotional connection that really.

Sets the tone for what is going to be happening to you and for you. And you know that feeling when you.

Touch it, it just spreads through you.

Thank you for taking my call. I don't know why I feel like crying.

I think I just feel your love. Of course. And I think I'm gonna get some ANSWERS.

I'm Summer McStravik and welcome to another.

Episode of Flow Dreaming. That' alright, here we are going into the Flow together today. I'm Summer McStravik and I'm continuing the series I've started recently. Things you can do with flow, Things you can do with Flow energy. Things you can do with Flow dreaming. If you're new to Flow Dreaming, by the way, and you're curious, what is it? What does it mean? How do you do it? Flow Dreaming is not meditation. It is different. It is an emotional, energetic technique that we use for reprogramming ourselves, for programming or manifesting in our future. That's why it is associated with Law of Attraction. Oftentimes because you are creating something. Flow Dreaming teaches you how to become the ultimate creator, how to make anything in your life, which often involves a lot of personal development along the way. Because we find as we start practicing this, that the more we want to make and do and grow and go big, the more we encounter those blocks, restrictions, day to day thinking, observations of lack, et cetera and so on that have kept us exactly where we are. So Flow Dreaming will teach you a different way of looking at the world, a different way of understanding your own behavior, as well as how to correct it, how to change it, how to grow new characteristics inside yourself, how to start responding to the past differently and pre sponding to the future differently. And that means there's. I really haven't found something yet that I could not use Flow to address. There's been no aspect of my life that hasn't benefited from this understanding of how I feel. The world and the universe works, let alone our minds, our consciousnesses, our spirits. So to that end, what I've done over the last Decade is I've created a library of something like 140, 150 different recorded flow dreams. And every one of these addresses a particular area of our lives. Some things are really obvious, like money or career or health. Some things are less obvious like stop procrastinating or unlock my true creative self, or reach my highest potential or speak my truth without fear or develop deep self love. So you'll find all of these@flow dreaming.com I bring it up because that is the website that supports this free podcast for you. By the way, if you've only accessed the first 30 episodes of this podcast, you know there's a couple hundred more out there waiting for you to find them. What you have to do is download the app. There's an app. You'll find it on any of your smartphones, your tablet, you might even find it on your computer. I know Macs have the App Store and that app will allow you for like a couple bucks a month to access hundreds of episodes. Every episode. I do almost every 99% of them contain a Flow Dream where we do active energy manipulation. I teach you how to use Flow. It's really unbeatable. So you can go back for almost 10 years and grab all of these teachings that way. The other way, of course, is to go get a couple of playlists from the manifesting store and if you're still not quite sure, best of all, just go jump into the newsletter, which is on the website, front page, the website, grab the newsletter and I give you basically a free gift bag, which is how to Flow Dream. An introduction. There's a 30 minute training that I give you, a spoken training. I help you understand how to use a Flow Dream. I give you your first Flow dream absolutely free. See if you like the concept, see if you can do it. If it messes with you, if it jives, as well as some other things that you'll find there. So that's the best thing to do. Jump on the newsletter and then check out those other places. Okay, enough said about what's been going on in Flow Dreaming this month. Oh, except for one other thing. Some of you guys have noticed the latest Flow Dreams that have come out. Those are Emotional Ecstasy and Crystal Clarity. You'll find those put together in a playlist for you. Each month I release a brand new Flow Dream. People who are in the Flow Dream of the Month club get that each month automatically loaded into their account so they can start working with it and have that aspect of themselves. And a lot of my podcasts follow the theme that I release in the store, as well as what's going on with my MI school students, my MI school students and my Private diamond coaching students, they're going through an even more intensive introduction to flow Dreaming. You know, getting really deep into it and what they can do and how they can change. But that being said, I bring it up because this month the Flow dream has been emotional ecstasy. And next month, I'll give you a heads up, it will be effortless decisions. How would you like to make effortless decisions? This is playing into today's theme, how to solve a difficult problem with flow. I'll actually be doing a podcast on effortless decisions next month. But if you want to solve a difficult problem with flow, one of the first things I'd recommend is the Crystal Clarity Flow Dream. After that, pay attention. Step up SNAP two. We're going to talk for the next hour about how to get through a problem using the energy of the universe, using guidance, using action, using self trust, using manifesting. In short, using every tool on your little tool belt. So here's where you're at. What's the best decision to make? How do I resolve an argument? What if none of the current options in front of me feel good? What do you do? Right? So the world gives you a set of tools. It says here, do this and this. Use your mind, use logic. Follow A to B, choose the choice that seems the least disruptive or, you know, stay in the status quo. Maybe if you don't do anything, it won't be so bad. Unfortunately, the way the world teaches us is to generally avoid things getting worse. Our world does not encourage us to make decisions based on things getting better. The majority of decisions are hold still and it won't be so bad, right? This is why for many of us, making decisions is agonizing. It's. We've been trained to think of them as agonizing. We've been conditioned to know that hard decisions are going to be agonizing. That's not so. That's just a training. That's a conditioning. It's a way of looking at the world and your life based on lack. Here's how it works. When you are working actively with flow, when you become the kind of person who says, I can look at my future, I can ask for new options. I can ask that it be filled with ease and alignment. I can ask that whatever I need to know be revealed to me. I can ask it and I know I'll receive it because I'm feeling it now. I'M mirroring it all around me. So therefore my future is going to have to get into alignment with me here. Well, if I'm that kind of person, then I'm not the kind of person who instead is saying, I better not do anything, I better wait and see. I better stay with the status quo. The reason I don't stay with the status quo is because I know if I do that then I'm just going to get more of same. The decision is going to remain out there hanging unmade or it will just make itself somehow. I throw my hands up, ah, whatever. I'm not in charge here. And the decision will come to pass probably because other people stepped in and started making the decisions and I go along with it. It's a very self protective state of being when you just go with status quo. When you just say, well, I'll wait and see. I don't know, I can't decide, I'm not sure. Nothing looks good to me, so I'll just sit this one out. There is no sitting it out. In truth, there is no such thing as sitting it out. That's like, you know, someone riding an escalator and saying, yeah, you look like you're just sitting it out. You're still going to reach the top or the bottom. You're just patiently ignoring the fact that you're on an escalator. You're moving. Do you want to be involved in this or not? A flow dreamer assumes they're going to be involved in it. A flow dreamer knows you, hey, yeah. Decisions are being made, paths are being created. You know, information is being exchanged. Right now, do I have a hand in this? And if I do, what do I want to anticipate will happen? Okay, so that is the first fundamental thing you want to be looking at. What is your approach right off the bat to that difficult problem? Okay, if you stop and say it's not status quo, I'm not just going to let things play out right. Or if you choose to let things play out, still flow, dream, still get in there and manage the playing out. Kind of like there's too many, you know, too many variables. So instead of me trying to coerce a direction, I will go into my flow and I'll just say, wow, there's a lot of variables here, a lot of possibilities for how this could happen. You know what I think I'll do? I think I'll just say whatever ends up occurring is for my greatest good. And I don't mean. And I'm being nasty. Learn your Lesson type, way, greatest good. I mean, no, it really makes me feel good. I feel good. I changed, I grew. Maybe I received something, maybe I understood something that just broke open all kinds of doors for me. Maybe it was that it turned out everybody got what they needed inexplicably. I don't know how it happened, but they did. Yeah. So if I'm going to roll with it, that's the feeling I'm going to roll with. If I'm going to wait and see and not do anything, I'm still putting that pre action into my flow. That's an option. That's one way to solve a difficult problem. Do nothing except define the outcome, define the emotional endpoint for it while you still step back and say, I don't know, here's what happens though. Often, yeah, you might want to do that. But at some point someone says, make a decision. Hey, we have to figure this out. Or oh, here's an opportunity to make a change. And you're going to be asked to take action, to take some sort of action in this decision, in this difficult problem. And that's where again, you'll get hung up and say, oh, what if I make the wrong choice? I better not do anything. Or you'll say, ooh, what if I make the right choice? What if everything turns out even better for me? And this difficult looking dilemma I had was kind of an illusion. It actually wasn't difficult. It actually wasn't ever going to give me that bad outcome that I was worried about considering. In fact, solving this difficult problem is the best thing I've ever done. Why? Well, first of all, I was given the opportunity to take some actions. That's when I checked in with my flow. I said, flow, If I do this, can I trust you? Flo, if I choose this, if I make this choice, if I go in this direction, can I trust you? Which is also like saying, can I trust myself? Do I trust myself to make a good decision? Do I? Well, how do I trust myself? One, I've got to feel that I'm working with the right information. Gotta have crystal clarity on this. If I'm making decisions based on muddled information or not knowing, of course I'm gonna feel insecure. On the other hand, I can't wait for 100% absolute victory before I act. That's ridiculous. If I had that kind of clarity and if I knew everything in advance, exactly how it was gonna turn out, what's the point of living? You might as well just snap your fingers and create a universe. We're not there yet. Too bad. No, we have to edge over into. It's feeling more right than wrong. It's feeling more yes than no. Am I a hundred percent no. But you know what? I trust my flow. I trust myself. Here's why I trust it. Because I've been through things like this before and I've solved difficult problems before and I use that trust. I use that trust. Sorry, I had to open my office door. You heard me pause. Get some air in here. So I use my trust and what happened is worked out. And most of the time it does work out. Now, every now and then, it hasn't worked out. And I've been tempted to say, oh my God, I trusted myself. I made that difficult, you know, decision. The problem was solved. And it wasn't solved to my liking. In fact, it went against me. And I've been tempted to say, oh my God, never trust yourself again. You had one bad outcome. Well, that skews everything. But you know what? I didn't do that. I simply said to myself, huh? I had three good outcomes in the last month for things that were a problem and I had one bad outcome. I'm going to take that bad outcome and I'm going to file it away and I'm going to say, I'm not really sure why you happened, but that's okay. I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing. I'm going to keep trusting. I'm going to keep asking for new opportunities, new options. I'm going to keep feeling how I think this could be resolved. In short, I'm going to keep it up. Why? Because here is my option, here's my other choice. To pull back and go back to status quo. If you do that, you're not a manifester. You are a going along wither. There's a big difference. The going along withers with it's going along with it's type people. They're always hanging back, thinking, don't see me, don't choose me, don't offer it to me. I'm going to stay safe back here, hiding behind the first row. And you know, sometimes that's okay, but it's not how most of us want to live. And I know because I hear from you guys all the time, I want to go bigger. I want to be seen. I want my work to be known, I want my talents to be valued. I want to be loved. I want to be chosen to be in a partnership. I want to choose somebody to be in a partnership with I want. I feel that's what I'm craving. Next. Those are the experiences. If you want those, then you cannot stop in the face of a difficult problem. Instead, you look at the difficult problem and you say, oh, boy. Okay, so here you are, a seemingly difficult problem. How do I solve you? I don't know exactly. But I'm going to start taking some educated guesses and I'm going to speak to flow. And between those two things, the educated guesses, meaning the actions I'm going to take and try and see, and the flow, which is the pre action I'm going to take on the other side between those two, it's going to have a really hard time not working out. So let's go. Let's engage. When you become a person who solves problems like this, when you see a problem that's even on the horizon and your first thought isn't hide, but your first thought is instead, engage. Can you imagine how that revolutionizes your life? Revolutionize? Is that a word? It is now. Does it creates a revolution in your life? Engage. Now, this isn't a problem seeker. It's different. But if something is sitting on your doorstep and it's blocking you and it's preventing you and you can't work it out, engage. Say, come on, get through this. The longer we don't get through this, the longer you're going to be sitting here locking everything else in my path. And that's not how I live because I'm a manifester and I know that down that path are more and more good things. So I have to solve you. I have to get through you. I have to engage with you. So I mentioned the two ways you engage, right? One way is through inspired action. If you don't know what that is, go check out my website. I've done podcasts on it as well. I actually have a flow dream called Action Action. It's wonderful. The other way is through preaction Flow dreaming. Here's what flow will help you with. Here is flow's expertise. You feel in your flow dreaming. I'm on a path of ease here. This doesn't have to be hard. It can be easy. Despite all appearances, this can be easy. I choose for this knot to untangle. I'm feeling the knot untangle. I'm feeling the best possible resolution pop up. I'm feeling it. It's there. I've got it. I'm feeling what it's like for things to resolve. I'm actually going to learn from this. My eyes are going to open to something I haven't really experienced before, which is how easily something seemingly difficult can resolve. I really want to see and understand that. I want to learn that because I've already learned that other stuff over and over. How to knock my head against things until it's bleeding. Right, Done that. No, instead, I'm ready to learn what it's like to watch something beautifully resolve with me. Engaging, actively. God, I'd love that. I want to have that experience. A lot of those kinds of experiences. I'm also learning and creating and feeling a state of plenty. You know, this difficult problem, chances are it has to do with scarcity. There's a good chance it has to do with, you'll get your needs met, but I won't get my needs met. You'll get your money, but I won't get my money. You'll get custody, but I won't get custody. Something along those lines. Not getting your needs met. So instead I'm feeling that I have plenty. It's a feeling everyone is getting their needs met. And I'm also learning what it's like to let go of that sense that someone has to win and someone has to lose. Something is mine, something is yours. Either or. Because I know that that is one of those presumptions I've been conditioned with to think that every problem has an either or, I win or you win. And there are plenty of natural systems out there in this world and in this universe where that's simply not the case. I don't need to follow that pattern. So, Flo, help me not follow that pattern. Help this difficult problem resolve. Show me a new way of allowing that to happen. Because I'm ready and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to learn it. I'm stepping up right now. So what I gave you, there was a little dib, dibs and dabs, a dab of education, a big dollop of mindset. This is how I think, this is how I feel, how a great manifestor feels when they are approaching a difficult problem. Okay? It's a little bit of knowledge and know how and it's a lot of the way you approach and the way you think. And that's what the show's really about. So we have a quick break to go to. When we get back, we're going to do a flow dream for solving a difficult problem. Problem. Excuse me. And we're going to get to your calls. What difficult problems do you. Do you guys have? What can I help you with or look into for you today. All right, so give me a call if you are listening live right now. That would be fabulous. I'd love to hear from you, help you out. The number to call when the show does air live, by the way, is 1-877-230-3062. It's toll free. The show is airing and this podcast is being recorded every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific Time. It has been for years. There's a small chance, of course, if you're listening to an ancient podcast, this has already become ancient, that I'll have a different time or something else will be changed. But you know, you can always go to my website, find out all the latest current. Current. All right, so stay with me. We'll be right back after this.

Hey, we're on break for just a minute so I can tell you about something extraordinary that I'm doing for the very first time in a couple of months. I'm hosting a live event in San Diego, California. It's called In Flow.

Get it? Inflow.

Inflow, you can play with that. It's a three day immersion into your flow filled life. These are three powerful days with me live. We'll be doing tons of processes to align you fully into your dreams, your manifesting your life. And I'm inviting you to come meet me. Come in from wherever you are in the world. Just be there. Go into Flow with me. We're so powerful as a group. If you have been listening to this podcast for months or maybe even years, you already have a sense of the power of flow dreaming. It's powerful, powerful, powerful. It's an amazing way to get your year going right. This is happening in February.

It's just past January.

You're looking ahead.

You're starting to think, what am I going to do this year? Am I actually making those changes I want?

Am I feeling aligned or am I feeling in stress? Come to Inflow.

Get it worked out.

It's happening over Presidents Day weekend here in the US A nice long weekend.

If you want to sign up or.

Even just learn more, go to my website, it's flow dreaming.com or get on my mailing list and I'll be sending you information. I encourage you to get your tickets very quickly. They will sell out. I'm convinced of that. There are a limited number of VIP.

Tickets available, so check it out.

I can't wait to see you and perhaps even meet you for the very first time. I'll see you all at Inflow.

Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. Gosh, where is everybody today? I have Open lines that hardly ever happen. So if you're thinking about calling in, go for it. Let's solve some of your difficult problems. That's what we're here for. I use a combination of flow, dreaming and manifesting, working with energy as well as reading. So, you know, flow inherently is an energy that can be read to read from, or written to, or read from. Sometimes I talk about it like that old CD rom, right? You can put information onto it, write the data to the cd or you can read the data off the cd. I like to think that our world is an interconnected web of information. And either we're actively shaping and creating information there, or we're reading what's currently going on and existing around us. We all do it truthfully, we all read this information and write to it every day, all day. We just typically don't have awareness that we're doing so because, you know, we're biological animals and we skew toward physical. It's the point of being here to skew toward physical, to have physical experiences. So it's just a matter of cultivating and opening to the rest of the information that's out there, which is occurring. And that's why, you know, some people are wonderful intuitives or wonderful healers. They've just cracked that little door open a bit more than the rest of us, that's all. Okay, let's go ahead and do our flow dream while you guys are thinking about what your questions are. Okay, we're going to move into the flow now and again. If you're not sure how to do this, just go to my website, sign up for the newsletter or the free gift that I have for you there, it will teach you everything you know, how to flow, dream. And begin by relaxing. Eyes are closing, shoulders are dropping. Breathing is easy. Your brow is relaxed. And you let your stomach out, feeling very comfortable and at ease in your body and comfortable and at ease in your environment. Preparing to flow, which feels just like letting go into a daydream. A daydream. Here you are. You can feel yourself walking, walking. Finding one of your favorite places to walk. Maybe it's on a sun dappled path. The tall trees on either side of you. It smells woodsy and warm. Smell of far away wood, smoke in the air, sound of birds, perfect temperature. A perfect, perfect day. This place where you're walking is filled with a vibration. It's filled with an energy you can sense. Everything around me is living. Everything around me is alive. It's alive. The path is alive. The green grass is alive. The very air is alive and filled with energy, filled with flow, filled with movement. This path itself is a path into my future. It's a path into my next minute and my next minute and my next moment and my next. And I'm walking this path without thinking, without effort at all. My legs move without any thought, without any sense of need to go anywhere. They just go. I just move. And as I look ahead, I can see the light shining down. The sun, the warmth, the glow ahead of me. I'm walking right into that. That's my future. My future is a good place. It's a good place I'm going. It's not a bad place. It's not a scary place. It's not anything I need to fear or brace for. My future is a great place. It's a place full of ease and clarity and awareness. It's a place where I myself have grown in my development, in my beingness, where I can embrace and enjoy even more. Because I myself am bigger and smarter, more wise, more fruitful. My thought, my feelings have changed to the degree that I expect there to be bounty. I expect there to be joy. I expect happy and good relationships. Why? Because this is who I am becoming. I am becoming this. And my future matches who and what I am. And I am becoming this with every step I take. Every step. Even. Even now as I find myself holding something in my hand. Just pausing to glance at it as I walk. What am I holding? It's something a bit heavy, something a bit gray. Like old knotted ropes off a big ship. Old, silvery, tarnished, rough, tangled, knotted, not heavy. But I'm not sure what to do with this. I know I'd feel freer and lighter if I didn't have it. I know that if this were truly resolved, I would be off into the next place even quicker, even faster. Maybe this decision, maybe this difficult problem, maybe it is so big it feels like it's been slowing me down. It's been sidetracking me. It's been calling my attention to it. It's been taking my attention away from those things that are really good and juicy and free and pure for me. And now that I'm realizing that, I know that I have no other choice. I must resolve it. I either keep it or resolve it. And I'm going to resolve it. I'm resolving it. So I pause in my walk. And I feel the energies pause with me as if everything has stopped. As I stopped and I hold this big knotted mass, this cluster, in front of me. And I Feel into it. I feel into it a sense of you don't have to be hard, you don't have to be difficult. You don't have to have a winner and a loser. You don't have to have any of those things, despite how you may look, despite what everything in the world may have told me to think about you or expect from you. I know you don't have to. I know that here. And you glance around, there are millions of possibilities, millions of probabilities, including one or two or half a dozen or a hundred where you can just easily resolve, resolve from my best for others best resolve in every possible way. And as I feel this, I notice this is becoming lighter in my hands, as if it were in fact dissolving from the inside, collapsing into dust, collapsing into light. Dissolving, dissolving. The knots slipping away from each other, untying itself. And look, I didn't have to do everything. I just had to feel it happen. And maybe I feel inspired to go in and tug something here, adjust something there. Oh, that's an inspired action. One or two that I might take along the way. Sure, I will do that if I feel called to. Absolutely. I am happy to nudge things along. But I'm doing it in tandem with the universe, with my higher self, with flow, with that knowledge that this is an option and it's the option I choose. And I'm feeling this difficult problem that I've had that I've been carrying. This thing that got stuck or stopped, this decision I had to make, this win, lose situation I was trying to balance whatever it is. I'm realizing I don't need it anymore. I don't need it. I don't align to it. I don't connect with it. I'm past it and beyond it. Therefore, it has nothing else to do but resolve, resolve. Well, resolve. Right. Resolve, resolve, resolve. And that's the feeling I linger on. A sense of joy bubbling up inside me, just pure joy. I don't need to deal with this any longer. I don't need to deal with this any longer. I am freed from it. I am freed from this difficult problem. I'm freed. It's no longer difficult. It's no longer a problem. It's no longer even mine. I'm freed. I hold that feeling even now as the scene around me dissolves in my eyes. They open. And there you have it. That was an example of a flow dream. An emotional, energetic exercise, a daydream. It's powerful, potent, gets you right into where the universe is doing its business and puts in some other new programming. So hopefully you felt emotional. You felt that sense of alignment on your path. You felt that sense of truly being in that place where things are being put together. That's a Flow dream. Okay, stay with me after this. Now you guys are calling full up. We'll get to calls right after we come back from this short break. I'm Summer McStraffic. This is Flow Dreaming.

Hi, it's Summer, but on break. And I know that some of you are still wondering, what is Flow Dreaming and what is MI School?

Because I refer to both of these.

Quite a bit in my podcast. Me School is a transformational program. It's a gorgeous and deeply revealing, empowering online school worldwide where I teach you how to remodel your life in any way you choose using the technique of Flow Dreaming as well as a bunch of other deeply powerful life changing processes. So ME School is either enrolling or it's accepting names onto the wait list. And that means that I'm accepting students who work with me for the year. And you can learn how to do.

What I do in life.

The way I think, the way I build things, make things, heal things. Everything I talk about you will learn directly from me how to do. You're going to create some amazing things. My MI schoolers, their lives change way beyond the norm. And you don't even have to be a superstar when you go in. Some of you are, and you're ready to go bigger, play in that bigger field. And some of you are just saying, hey, help.

What's next? Where should I go?

And both are fine. Both are great if you're ready to go big. But you know that you need to deepen your own spiritual practice and your personal growth, because that's where it all comes from, right? Then this is where you need to be. Your life only grows as big as you do. So here's what to do. Go over to flowdreaming.com and click on MI School. And during these enrollment periods, you can.

Actually set up a free phone call.

With me or my staff and we'll talk about it.

Is it a fit? Is it interesting?

During waitlist times, we just put you on a list of people who've expressed interest, so we can notify you as soon as the doors open.

All right. I look forward to hearing from you.

And even more, to getting to know you as one of my personal students in ME school. Now let's get back to the episode.

Manifest your life with Summer McStravic and Flow Dreaming. Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. We're going to get to calls now. Let's start with Cindy in Hawaii. Hey, Cindy, how are you today? Cindy? Cindy, are you there? Cindy, are you there? Oh, darn, I'm not hearing you. How about if we. Hold on, Cindy, we'll try and get you up. I'm not sure where you are. Oh, there you go. Oh, yes, yes.

There you are now. Okay.

Yay.

Yes. Yes, yes. Yay. How can I help you?

I am in the Emmy school. Yes, I'm under seat day. But anyway, I posted something today on the website and, okay, so I have a particular pattern with my ex, and now that I am doing the Emmy school school, and I'm feeling so good, I feel like he always. He senses that and he grabbed me down and we're right now on Friday, he saw me and I just did the self love flow dream. And he said, oh, you look really good. You're shining, you're sparkling. And then the next day, he proceeds to call me and cancel plans that we had together with our daughter. And he was very just. I could tell, you know, the energy just had went from being really super sweet one day to being, you know, just very standoffish. So I'm ready to move on and figure this out. And I know I take responsibility for, you know, for what our patterns were before, but I just need to know how I can move past this.

Yeah, you've got a couple of different questions all bundled up in this one. I think, you know that.

Yeah.

One of them has to do with the fact that when we change, people who've been in our life in the past, they, you know, they want to be supportive of us because they recognize you're growing, yet at the same time, it means you're becoming different than them, which is very scary. That's why you'll often see families who, you know, one person starts to really grow and become more powerful. You know, speak up, take charge, start saying no. Create boundaries. And the family just gets into a tizzy over this and starts to argue with them to create drama and scenes. The family is trying to say, hey, don't leave our pack. Don't leave our pack. You're scaring us because you're changing and you're becoming different than we are. So in a weird way, it's a kind of loving thing to do. But, you know, obviously it's ultimately not. It's just that they don't know any other way to behave. So that's part of it. You know, the other issue that Goes on. What's your ex's first name?

It's Jordan.

Jordan. I'm just going to take a quick peek at him and see how he's feeling. You know, when I said resentful earlier, I think it was already there. That's his energy. It's resentful. He's carrying this, like, he wants to be sweet and good, and he wants to be that cool guy who is being cool about the whole thing, you know, because it makes him feel better about himself. If he can say, well, yeah, we're friends. I'm cool. But on the other hand, he's resentful and only you know what that resentment's about. But it comes up like you're getting something he doesn't get, or you're. I don't know if you were the one that did the leaving, but there's something about what was wrong with me. Why am I not good enough? Why do you want more? It just comes up. He has. He has some feelings of blame, and I think that is more what you're experiencing with him. Can you. Does that sound right to you?

It does. I did do the leading, but we've been apart for two years. But during those two years, we've gotten back together a few times for, like.

A couple of weeks.

And then he says, I'm done. I can't do this anymore.

Yeah.

And I've taken my responsibility for, you know, my insecurities in the relationship, but he has. He blames me that the whole relationship was my fault.

Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Blame.

Yeah.

Yeah, blame.

Blame and resentment, they're like bosom buddies. They're almost virtually the same feeling. Blame is when you take the resentment and you say, it's not mine, actually, it's you. Yeah. Okay. Resentment is when you recognize it's my feeling. You know, I have to own that. Resentment's even a little closer to ownership. Blame really is. No, it's all you. It's not me. It's never me. Which, you know, in me school, you will learn. It's always you. It happens.

Yes, I know. That's where I died. I'm like, I know this is me. I take my part in this.

I know if it weren't you, you couldn't do anything about it. So, yes, take all the blame you can. Load it on, because it's yours. You know, that's your. That's your power. Yeah.

So how do we start?

Oh, how do you.

Yeah, I was gonna say, how do you resolve this?

Yes.

You know that your best course of action for me, I mean, right now that I'm feeling is very gentle. Oddly enough, I don't see you being, you know, strongly, you know, putting up walls or defenses or, you know, saying, this is my space. It's a gentle feeling. It's like a gentle detachment. It's. It's becoming an observer, gently detached that really feels key. If you were to develop more of that in yourself, it's just a sense of taking always one step back.

Mm.

I think you're going. I think that's. That would be a really good next step for you. Okay.

And that's what I've been starting to do. So yay. I'm on the right path.

All right, thank you so much. Okay, take care, Summer, and I'll see you in class soon.

Sounds good.

Bye. All right, bye. Cindy was referring, by the way, to the ME School of Flow. It is my year long program where we you learn everything, the up and down of being a manifestor. Everything about flow dreaming, everything about empathic intuition. If you're curious about that, you know, get in touch with me through my website. There's a page up there. You can read all about it as far as when it next enrolls. In fact, you can enroll at any point. It will be starting next year. This year's class is already well underway. Hey, is it Kyosha? Kyosha, New Jersey. Have we spoken?

Hi.

Hi. How are you? You seem familiar.

Yeah, I've called you before.

Okay.

Yeah. Well, my question is basically I just want you to like, look into my flow. Like, what's the core, the nature of who I am as far as possibly being a parent? I want to know, like, do I really want to be a parent one day or is that something that's just not inside of my flow? Or if it's not there, could I flow, dream and create it to want it to be there one day?

I'm curious why the issue is in your life right now.

Well, I'm in a relationship and I have a boyfriend who proposed to me and the kids came up and I feel uncertain about it. And he knows for sure that he wants kids. But I have this uncertainty about whether I want to be a parent. And if I do end up deciding I want to have kids, I want it to always be for me, not anyone else. If I'm going to be a parent one day, I wanted to be generally for me. And I try not to get caught up in ego. Like, if my ego asking this question.

And going through this whole pondering how old are you?

I'm 25.

25?

Yeah.

So truly, you actually have a little time to decide, but I understand that you want to honor your boyfriend by not wasting his time. If it's going to be a no. Yeah, right.

So.

So that's a decision the two of you will make as a couple. How long do you want to wait for me to make that decision? It might be something I grow into. I don't know. When I look into you, though, what comes up for me a lot is fear. Your desire, your ambivalence, your uncertainty about being a mom. You have a lot of fearful thoughts about how do I protect my children? How do I keep them safe?

How.

How do I not emotionally damage them? How do I make sure they don't experience things I experienced? You have a lot of safety issues inside of you. Fear and safety. You don't want any child to experience things, you know, that. That you may have. And I don't know what those things are. Could be feeling emotionally abandoned or physically abandoned. But.

Because I want to make sure if I become a parent, it's for me, not because I'm in a, you know, a good relationship. Like, regardless the relationship works out or not, I want to make sure that feeling remains there. I want Alicia, my life and more, you know, positive feelings.

You know what you need to do? You need to embark on a year really healing yourself and healing your relationship with your parents, if possible, as well as healing your childhood, healing who you were, how you were raised. If you are able to address that and get comfortable with that, you will absolutely understand that you can now make any choice you want insofar as what kind of parent you will be. It's not just about do I become a parent or not for you, it's I can become any kind of parent I want. And if I want to be a spectacular, fulfilled, joyous mother, I can do that. If I want my children to be protected and smart and creative and well cared for and financially abundant and stable in our household can do that. So you have. There's a gulf between your expectations right now and your fears, and that's what you can't resolve. If you could resolve that, the answer to whether have kids or not would be easy for you. So you have to heal up a lot of this stuff. I would take a year to do it. Tell your boyfriend I need a year. I'm going to resolve a lot of my own issues in my family and then see how I feel, you know, and thank him. You know, say thank you, honey, for sending me off on this new path, on this journey. Because you're right. It had to be done. And you're the one who inspired me to do it.

Okay?

Okay.

Okay.

All right, my dear. Thank you, and good luck to you.

Okay, thank you.

Take care. Well, look at that. Our show is wrapping up today. No time, unfortunately, for any other callers. So, yeah, I think I've already mentioned a few things, but I'm going to mention a couple more. One, you guys can email me anytime you want. Summerlowdreaming.com I especially love show suggestions. And sometimes if you email me about how you've been using Flow dreaming, a lot of you guys are closet flow dreamers, meaning you've been doing this for years and you've never mentioned it. You've never said anything to me. You've never even been to my Facebook page. Oh, my God. So come to my Facebook page, you know, share whatever has gone on for you, happened with you. It inspires everybody when we see each other taking power, and especially when you share that you found a technique that actually works for you. You just want to tell other people, hey, do this, too. It works. Believe me, I've tried tons of things that haven't. So when you come across a gem, really. Share. Share it. Share it. The other thing I wanted to mention is that you can find apps. I already mentioned the one app that will let you listen to all the archives. But when you do find the app, or if you do go through itunes or someplace like that, if you do me a favor and just do a quick little rating of the show, even if it's just to put some stars down, something like that, it does wonders for getting this podcast out there. And as many of you guys know, I have zero marketing budget. I actually don't pay for any way to market this program. It is strictly word of mouth, and that means you guys. So anything you do towards giving it a boost is I deeply, deeply appreciate it from just truly the bottom of my heart, as well as my entire flow. So, all that being said, my love to you guys. And next week, we're gonna have another episode of things you can do with flow. Until we get through as many as I feel like, yeah, I like to be flexible and flow. All right, goodbye, everyone. Talk to you next time.

All right, that wraps up our episode today. But before you go, two things. One, you can get the flow dreaming app in the Google, Amazon, or itunes app stores. It allows you to search and sort to mark your favorite episodes. It's completely free to download or, and it gives you access to the latest several dozen of these episodes, as well as to the Premium Episode Library, where there are more than 400 episodes that date back 10 years. The app's free, so go download it now at Flow Dreaming in the App Store on your mobile device. And last, if you love my show, I'm going to give a shout out to my mom's podcast. It's called the Dear Venus show, and she's an amazing intuitive and a medium and super, super funny. Search the words Dear Venus in your podcast directory or online and that way you can find her too.