#452 You Gotta Trust Someone, Sometime

Flow Dreaming.

It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does.

It gives you a feeling of power.

Again in your lives.

Oh, my God.

You were so on target. You are so amazing. I can't thank you enough.

Breath.

It is the feeling that you bring forward. It is your emotional connection that really sets the tone for what is going to be happening to you and for you. And you know that feeling when you touch it, it just spreads through you.

Thank you for taking my call. I don't know why I feel like crying.

I think I just feel your love.

Of course.

And I think I'm gonna get some ANSWERS.

I'm Summer McStravik, and welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Welcome to Flow Dre. Before we get started, a really quick note. If you found this show on itunes or by downloading the Flow Dreaming podcast app, it would mean so much if.

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Flow go to all of you who.

Just take that few moments to go write a quick little message of telling other people.

This is good. Go listen. Thanks.

Now off we go to the show.

Welcome to Flow Dreaming. Hi, everybody. Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, wherever you are, whatever time it is in your part of the world, I'm excited, as always, to be with you. For the next hour. We're talking about your mind, your potential, the way you think, the way you act, the way you behave, the way you prepays. In other words, the way you are engaging not just with your life right now, but with the life that is being developed in front of you. Your future. Based on the energy, the consciousness, the expectations that you're carrying around in this moment. Flow Dreaming is a method for manifesting and creation. It's very different than Law of Attraction, though. It does overlap some key points. But it's a system for thinking, really, as well as a practice that you take up that allows your future to start flowing with ease, with a kind of grace, intention, purpose. It allows things that are tangled up to get untangled and smooth out. It allows you to bring into your next few days, months, years, life, the kinds of experiences that you've always wanted or that you currently want or that you've just recently decided that you Want. It's a way of interacting that will make you intensely powerful. As you realize I am not just a co creator, like I say to myself all the time, but I'm doing this, I'm being this. And life is reflecting it back to me over and over in better and better ways. I've been practicing this for more than a decade, I guess my whole life, but at least a decade in a formal sense. And I look at my own life as a kind of example. And that's not to say that the most amazing things have continuously happened. Some things have been horrible in my mind, terrible. But they've been adjustments. They've been things that have had to occur to get me into my true correct alignment. And I have noticed over the years, my life has continuously improved. It's getting better. I had a really interesting experience today. Today is my husband's last day of work. He's left a company that he's been with for 10 years. And it's because he has a beautiful new career opportunity that's opened up to him. So I was thinking back to when I last left my last job. Many of you guys know, it was Hay House. And I was thinking the state of mind that I was in, the fact that I was so stubborn, I hung on and hung on by my fingernails instead of just moving with my flow. Back then, I'm thinking how proud I am of my husband that he is moving with flow. He is saying, all right, this is good, but there is better. It feels right. It senses itself as being right. Could be a good thing, could be a bad thing in the end, I don't know. But I'm just feeling this is where I have to go. This is what I have to do. This is my next step fearlessly. Our show today is about trust. And this story kind of plays into trust. Gosh, about six years ago, I'd say I was at the bottom point of trust in my life. I had just left Hay House. I had developed a lot of feelings about people, employers, friends, family. That centered around the idea that there's not many people you can trust. You make agreements and other people break them. You do good stuff and you expect something in return and they don't give it to you. And you've been used. Lots of that swimming around in my head. Mostly it was ideas on how other people were supposed to act, how companies should act. If you're doing a great job, you should be rewarded by xyz. How friends should act, co workers should act, husbands should act, and being hugely disappointed by just about everybody in my life. What happened to me is. Well, to be honest, I had to cocoon for a while. I cocooned. I went inside. I folded myself up like a little origami box, and I just processed and released. And the way it looked to the outside world was I'd go lay in the backyard and take sunbaths. I kept writing and working on flow dreaming, right? My shining light, the one thing I always knew would lead me out. I began to focus on things that were deeply meaningful to me, that we're going to. Excuse me. Sorry, distracted. That was a phone. Things that were deeply meaningful to me that were going to make life differences to me. And as I started to really get deep into this journey and bring more people aboard and realize that flow dreaming was, in fact, my true calling, and I was going to stay there for quite a while, and that if I was going to teach other people, I better get my own crap together. Things began to change a lot. And I realized a big problem that I had in myself was trust. And then it wasn't all these other people around me, the people who had betrayed me, the people who had not seen my value, the people who had gone behind my back. And you could name. I could name a whole list of things that I would complain about. The problem was me, because I had shrunk to the point where I trusted almost no one to take care of me, to do right by me, to help me, to stay loyal to me, to grow with me, to do all kinds of things, whatever was on my list. And when you get in that kind of place, it's like being in a walled castle. No one can come in. I'm safe in here. But it also means I can't go out, because in my head, if I go out there, it's going to be like this. So as I was putting together my notes for today's show, I was thinking about not just my trust issues that I had developed, but a lot of my clients and students. Trust issues. And so I put together a list of, I don't know, very typical statements that I have said about myself or maybe you have said about yourself. And I'm going to bring them up for you right now, Kind of go through this crazy list because I want to know if any of these trigger something in you. When you develop a lack of trust in life and in other people, there is always an equally balanced lack of trust in yourself. And I know that I had been coming to this for a long time because it wasn't just one period in my life. It was an aggregate of many periods, you know, starting in childhood. And it was just that at this point in like 2000, say 9, I said to myself, what is going on? Is this, like my karma? Is this my destiny? Is this my, you know, my past life thing that I'm working through? What is going. Why is the trust thing so continuous? Like, it hit its maximum capacity? In my life, I began to think. You know, it's funny. Everybody's had someone betray them. Everybody's had somebody not value them. Everybody's had someone spill their secret. Everybody's had someone say one thing and do another. We've all had this happen. We've all had it. Parents that disappoint you don't protect you. Employers who don't go by their side of the bargain. Co workers who try and throw you under the bus. Husbands, wives, girlfriends, boyfriends who say they're in love with you, but really they're not. They're just biding their time till they do something to hurt you. Or maybe they are in love with you and they still hurt you. Couldn't help it. We all have these, every one of us. The difference is some of you are dealing with it beautifully. You say so that happened to me. It's not a reflection of me. I still trust myself, and I will continue to extend trust to other people. You see how that feeling is very open? It's expansive. Yes. It happens. Yes. I kind of expect it sometimes, not all the time, because I'm a flow dreamer and I'm very careful about what I expect. But I know it's within the realm of possibility because I don't control other people. But even if it does happen, it's not going to stop me from never falling in love again, from never getting another job, from never starting my own company again, from ever getting a close friend again. So there's this other crowd, other group of us who we get to that point where we've been hurt, betrayed, broken, disappointed so many times that we just say, I'm stopping. I'm stopping. I don't trust, and I'm going to start living my life from that basis. I don't trust. So let me get back to that list because I just went off another tangent. Here are some of the opinions. One I had was, I tend to hire bad people. I hire crazy people. I hire people who aren't loyal. I hire people who xyz. I had a whole list of them. Now it's not the people. Do you hear? What's really going on in that belief, not trusting other people. I'm not trusting myself. I'm saying, I have a problem. I'm not good at xyz. You might have that one, too. Maybe not with hiring people, but with something else. And so the way I was coping was to say, well, I just will never hire people again. I'm never, never going to do that again. No. Until, you know, five, six years later, I realized, wow, I have to hire people. But I can't. You suck at it. You're so bad. And I had to say, wait a second. I'm intuitive. I read people like that. I mean, what. How can I be holding two completely opposite beliefs about myself? I had to decide which one's right and which one's wrong. And I finally decided, you know what I do hire good people. I've hired some people who weren't good. Things changed. I didn't keep up. Big deal. I'm going to hire people again. I corrected my own inner trust. I can do this, and I will hire people that I will prove it to myself. I can do this with. And if I sense that things aren't right, I have to go in and engage. I have to get even more clear. I have to build the trust. I don't just have to extend trust now. I have to actually build it, create it, pay attention to it, make a bridge between myself and others that's always open and constantly clear. Here's another one. Employees or bosses are only looking out for themselves. We're starting with work ones, by the way. Meaning my co workers are only looking out for themselves. My employees, they're only looking out for themselves. My boss is only looking out for themselves. No one's going to hurt me. I mean, excuse me, no one's going to help me, but they will hurt me. If it's to their advantage, they won't live up to their bargain. They won't give me a raise. They won't give me a promotion. My coworker is going to take credit. My employees are gunning for my job. You ever felt these ways? Yes, Many of us have. Most of us have. What's the trust issue there? Are you not trusting other people? Can you look inside yourself and say, what is it about myself I don't trust? Maybe I'm afraid that if I lose this, I'll never get something like it again. Maybe I don't trust myself, that I could rebound, that I could be seen for the truth. Maybe I feel that I won't be able to ever have another job that pays Me like this so I have to suffer through all these people who are making my life miserable. There's a trust issue inside you is what I'm getting at. How about this? Well, it's kind of a variation. You think you're working really hard for a raise or promotion. You think that everything's pretty laid out, clear. And then the company says, oh, sorry, no, we're not going to do it. And then, you know, Sally Jo across the way gets the promotion instead. You ever had that happen? How about we move on to friends? Partners? How about your friends who say one thing and then they do another? Oh, yeah, let's. Let's go out on Friday. Oh, no, I forgot. I said that I went out with another group of friends instead. Oh, yeah, you're my best friend, huh? But no, I didn't tell you that I'm so. Oh, you have friends like that? Friends you don't really trust. Roommates. What about people who act like they like you but behind their back? Behind your back? They don't invite you out with them or they snub you in other ways. You don't have a feeling of good trust. Are we looking at ourself here? What is it about ourself? Am I not good enough? What's wrong with me? How come I don't trust myself to actually have really good, close, tight friends? What's wrong with me that those people wouldn't like me? Why didn't I take care of this the moment it came up? Why did I allow someone to do that to me? And instead of just saying, hey, that's not cool, I didn't say anything. And I let it happen again and again. And now I just think, can't trust anybody. Likewise, you can't give your secrets to anybody because you know that they will tell them, or worse, they're going to use it against you or they're going to throw it back in your face sometimes? Meaning you can't trust people with intimacies, with things that are deep and real in your heart. How about the big kicker? Husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend? Yeah, they're gonna cheat on me. They've cheated on me before. They thought I didn't know, or I did know, or maybe they didn't cheat. Maybe I think they're gonna leave me. I really don't trust them. They say they love me, but I'm not sure. Somehow I need to protect myself. I can't fully love them and give them to give to them, because if I do, what if? What if? What if you're not trusting your partner. You're not trusting yourself. You're not trusting yourself to have a good, strong, open, decent, communicative relationship. You're not trusting yourself that if you see something, you can handle it, deal with it and figure out how to climb out of it. Okay, two more personal stuff. Believe me, this is a small list. It's just the most common list I see. This is one about you feeling about yourself. Every time I get excited about something, it's usually the wrong thing and I'm going to get taken advantage of or I'm going to lose money again. One more thing that I did that was so dumb that I really wanted. I just don't trust any of those quote unquote opportunities of a lifetime. In fact, I don't quote, I don't trust any opportunities. They're all too good to be true. None of them work out for me. They're all scams, right? Not trusting the world, not trusting what comes to you. Not trusting flow, bringing you what you need. Look inside. You're not trusting your own self to distinguish what is good for you and what you want. You're putting a value judgment on the experience before you ever have it, based on past experiences, assuming they'll be similar when you really don't know. Maybe in fact you will get the same experience over and over until you conquer your trust issues around it. Okay, that's a big one. You have to conquer your trust issues in your life if you want to stop getting those same experiences. That for me was the biggest. Pivotable, pivoted, pivot, pivotal turning point when I realized I can float room all I want for beautiful employees, good friends, harmonious relationships, good business relationships. I can flow dream all I want for that. Day and night I can constantly be generating and creating this, this awesome energy. Good stuff comes to me. But if I am at the same time sending out a vibe, a feeling, a knowing, creating also in my energy structure, a feeling of. Yeah, but most of it, most of them aren't going to work out. Yeah, but I don't know. It's never worked out for me before. I gotta be really careful. Think what that does. What is that really creating for me? It's creating a very mixed bag of occurrences. It's making it much harder for me to navigate because yes, good stuff is coming, but bad stuff is still coming too. And then I'm really confused. Which one's the good one, which one's the bad one? Here I am learning how to trust myself and now I've made It even more complicated. What you have to do instead is clearly commit. I will trust again. I will trust. I'm going to do it again. I'm going to risk having my heart broken. I'm going to risk moving to this new city for this new job and having it not work out. I'm going to risk telling this man or woman how I really feel about them and do they want a relationship with me, too. I'm going to risk hiring employees. I'm going to risk starting my company. I'm going to do it. I'm going to start having trust again. And this time, I'm going to build the opposite of what I had before, because I'm very wrong, that I can't trust. That's something I made up in my head to protect myself. And I went to my walled castle and I stayed there and I hung out until I got very bored and kind of hungry and I could look outside of it. And everybody else seemed like they were having fun. But I wasn't playing anymore. I was the kid who got mad at handball and went home, sat in their room, darn kids cheating, not letting me have my turn. What are you gonna do? You get back out there, you play more handball. Because at some point, you're gonna be the kid cheating, not letting somebody else have a turn. We play into other people's trust dramas.

As much as they play into ours.

Whether it's intentional or inadvertent, everybody's got to play this part. It's not like they've been assigned roles their whole life. You guys are the untrustworthy ones. You guys are the upstanding citizens. You guys all play your parts the entire life. Nobody could deviate. Good guys are good guys, bad guys are bad guys. No, silly. We were all going to betray people. We're all going to break other people's trust. You have to go back out into the game. And not only that, when you go back out, the feeling is then, yeah, this might not work out. But you know what? So what? I'm staying out. I'm staying out in the field, I'm staying out in the game. I'm staying out in the village, and I'm gonna love and I'm gonna eat, I'm gonna build, I'm gonna make money, and I'm gonna do all kinds of stuff. So here's what happened in my life. Once I started adopting that attitude, which was, by the way, really freaking scary, I did not want to get hurt again. I had a life, big thing built up in my Head that this was my issue for my life. Maybe it still is. I don't know. But I do know that now I say, all right, I'm gonna enter into this relationship, this business relationship, this personal relationship, whatever. It's usually having to do with, you know, other people because they're the ones who hurt you or whatever. Sometimes it is with yourself. Like, every time I get excited about something, it's usually the wrong thing and I'll get taken advantage of. That's purely inner trust. But you still are using something outside of you to bounce that trust issue off of the new offer for a new job. The friend who wants you to go into business with them, you know, the program you want to take. We always have to bounce that trust off something else, right? But I committed. I said, I am going to prove that I have relationships that are incredibly strong and trustworthy. And I'm going to count who these people are in my life, and I'm going to count the ways they've been trustworthy. And I'm not going to expect that they're fully trustworthy in every single way any more, that I would want someone to put that burden on me, right? Because I might screw up and they might screw up, too. But I'm going to count who these trustworthy people are, and I'm going to look at that and realize, oh, I made a good decision there. Oh, I made a good decision there. Oh, I do have people like that. Oh, it's not everyone. This is a good one. This is a good one. This is a good one. Right now, I could actually write a list of all of the good relationships I have in my life, in my work, in my friendships, in my personal and family life. I could write out a list. I love and trust this person, and they've always been good to me with a few minor defects. I love and trust this person. They have not always been trustworthy, but they're trustworthy now. I love and trust this group of people. I feel that they're good people to work with, and I'm going to give it a go. Now I have a list on the other side, too. These are people I don't want to work with. These are people I don't want to give my secrets to. These are people I don't want to take into my heart and my family. It's fine to have that list as well, but you want to start developing that list of things that prove to yourself I can trust, I can engage, and what's going to happen as you do this is your own sense of trust in who you are, in what you can do and what you can achieve is going to build. It's going to build. And you'll start saying things about yourself like, gosh, I make mostly right decisions. Gosh, when I make a bad decision, I actually am able to correct it. And it's not the end of the world. I don't have to stick with it. Right? That is what, in my mind, flow dreaming is brilliant at doing brilliant. Stay with me. I just realized we have a quick break, but when we get back, I'm going to teach you here how to put the other piece into it, right? You make the commitment, you say, yes, here are the areas I'm going to start rebuilding trust in. No, I'm getting out of my walled castle there. I have plans and goals and I need to go big. And then we're going to figure out how you put your flow dreaming in there to make it actually happen in a way that is very supported and for the best. All right? So stay with me. We'll be right back.

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That's right, here we are, back for more flow Dreaming. I'm your host, Summer McStravik. We're talking about trust issues. I think almost all of us have them. And one of the ways you can identify yours is simply ask yourself, where.

And what am I cutting off in my life?

Right. And sometimes you've been cutting it off successfully for years, and you're like, nah, I don't want to change it. Right. I don't trust that I can handle alcohol well, so I'm cutting it out. I don't trust that part of myself. So I'm managing it instead. Got it. However, what about something like everything I've ever tried to do has failed? All of the. Every time I tried to, you know, start a company or start a business or even get a better job, it's just like, this is all I can do. Your ambition has failed. You don't trust your ability to grow or go bigger or have change. I see a lot of people like this. They're in the same job. They're unhappy, they hate it. They don't trust the world. They don't trust their flow to give them anything better. So their ambition is the area of life where they have no trust. I'm never going to get any better than this. This is it. As good as it gets. Of course, the common one most people think of right away is never going to get married again. Nope. Not going to have another boyfriend. Nope. No wives for me. Did that. Right. It's the area of your life that you shut down, cut off, say no to. Nope. I suck at it. I stink at it. I'm not going to go there. Never works out. I don't trust it. Something's wrong with me or wrong with my karma. Ain't going there. So it's like a bald spot in your life, really. Right. It's the area where nothing is happening, where you've purposely shut it down and shut it off, and maybe you're happy with it, maybe you're not, though. Maybe you only arrived at that because you wanted to protect yourself and protection was the best you could do. So you decided to stay there because you never learned how to think about yourself differently from the point where you got safe, from the point onward from when you got safe. So how do we get safe? How do we change that? How do we do that thing where I just said you have to consciously build new relationships that refute the old ones? I want to talk to you about a term it's called negativity bias. Been talking to my MI schoolers about this recently. It's something that we all contend with daily because it's built into us, biologically hardwired in our brains. Negativity bias is the tendency we have to remember the bad, sucky stuff and forget about the good, wonderful stuff. Right? Ten people say, you look amazing. One person said, did you gain weight? Who do you remember at the end of the day, oh, my God, I'm so fat, I gained weight. It's our tendency to stick with the things that cause us anxiety, fear, worry, where we didn't perform well, where somebody hurt us. Negativity bias evolved to protect us. Something might hurt me that didn't feel good. Maybe there is something hiding behind the tree that's going to eat me. I need to be aware of things that get my stress hormones going. And negative comments, even criticisms, they get my stress hormones going. We're living in a very different world. Our bodies are meant to be detecting predators or things that might get us kicked out of our social circle where we can't procreate anymore. But in today's world, it's people stealing our parking spots, it's being overcharged and not getting a refund. It's people saying, did you gain weight? It's a constant onslaught of tiny negativities. So when we're talking about trust, those negative things are way bigger in your head than all the many, many positive things. You have been selectively focusing on the negative, and you need to selectively now take that focus off the negative in a very conscious way and move it on to the positive. Move it on to all the people who did help you all the time. Someone went out of their way for you all the time. Somebody stepped in on your behalf and saved your butt. All the times that you had men or women flirt with you and make you feel like I am attractive and beautiful and interesting and creative or whatever it is. All the times that you were offered jobs, all the people who honored you by saying, wow, you're really good at xyz, there's tons of those in your life. But the negativity bias is skewing your trust factor. When you flow dream, you start to correct this. You counterbalance that negativity bias, and you start programming in a beautiful opposite kind of bias, a bias instead where you're feeling, thinking, and behaving like, yeah, I think everything's going to work out for me. I know that I'm going to get what I need when I need It. And yeah, it may come in the form of a swift kick in the butt, or it may come in the form of a $2,000 bonus in my, you know, post box. I don't know. But I do get what I need when I need it. Flo has my back. There's an easy route. I can trust people. This relationship will go well. If it doesn't, I'm going to swoop right in and make any corrections along the way so that if I have to exit it, I can do so with grace. I can say, wow, I gave everything into that that I could. I used my highest self, my. My best abilities to really go deep in and say, what's up? How can we do this? Da da, da, da, da. And it turned out it just wasn't a fit. But there's nothing else that I could have done. I really was at the top of my, I hate to say game, but the top of my selfhood. It's this kind of thing that flow dreaming will help you with. So when I began rebuilding my trust, I'll use the example of staff, because I've used that one a couple times already. I began saying things like, the most amazing people are walking into my life right now who want to help me resolve my trust issues. They want to help me resolve them. They're there to show me and teach me I can trust you. You can rely on me. They're coming in to help me grow my company, to grow flow drumming, to help my mi schoolers to do all the paperwork, and. And we have the best relationship ever. I am beautifully shocked, surprised, delighted at how well and easygoing our relationships are with each other. How easy it is to say, oh, what's going on? Oh, we need to fix this. Oh, and just deal with things without drama, without conflict. I am flowing and feeling these people in my life. They're coming in to say, we're going to help you resolve your trust issue with this. Just that one feeling phrase works miracles. You can apply this to, I'm flowing in a relationship that is going to help me understand that I can trust again, that I can love again, that my heart doesn't always need to be broken. Now, this is not saying that the relationship may not end, but what if it ends in such a way that you both totally admire each other, love each other, trust each other, and that the taste in your mouth is just exquisite, even though for whatever reasons you decided, we're just not quite it. But I'm leaving feeling like, wow, I totally trusted you. You trusted me and it was great, right? Ditto for employer, employee, co workers, family. Family. I'm flow dreaming a feeling in my family that I can trust someone that I love. This is trickier because if you pinpoint it on certain people, flow has much more limited abilities. And now you're starting to corral people to do what you want them to do. Okay, so family is not the one that I would say practice with first. Because then you're going to start trying to nudge other people's behavior into things that you want them to do. And they're not going to do it necessarily because maybe that's not what they're trying to create for themselves right now. They may be stuck in the feeling of I don't trust anyone. You're always going to take advantage of me. You always have. You always got all the better ice cream cones growing up. I'm not going to. When you're practicing this in flow, the feeling is people come into my life, opportunities come in. Things at work shift right? Be broad, be general. It's way more important that you ask for the feeling of what you want to have. I want to rebuild my trust here. And it is occurring and the right people, places and things are coming in to support it. And when they do come in, I am fully going into it and engaging. Now you've totally shifted. That walled castle just crumbles around you. It's done, it's down. And now you're making whole new kinds of relationships and expectations in your life. Your own inner trust is starting to go up, up, up, up, up, up, up as well. Anyway, I know that was a big bunch of heavy stuff today. Thank you guys, those of you who are still here listening. I think what I want to do is actually take a couple of quick calls or one or two calls and just kind of help you out with some things. In case you're not aware, not only do we use flow to make stuff, create stuff to change our inner dynamic, right? Because when we're doing this self talk, it's not just self talk. We're actually manipulating emotional energy. The technique of flow dreaming teaches you how to do this. I probably should broadcast another how to flow dream show. But you know what I did instead? I created a downloadable gift basket on.

My website@flowdreaming.com so if you go there.

And you fill out your information, I send you a free audio training that teaches you how to flow dream, how we do this emotional reconditioning, this energetic reconditioning and pre pavement how you actually change Your inner structure so that your outer world then starts to mirror who you are inside. And all the big, beautiful, juicy, yummy stuff you've changed about yourself. Such as? I trust now I have great people in my life I can trust. Anyway, so go grab it there. What I was saying though is that the other way that we use flow is intuitively right. I don't just create things with it. I also read information. If you're going to make stuff, you better have good background on what you're trying to make, right? It's like you don't go and try and build a glass house in an earthquake zone. So being able to read information, being able to be empathically intuitive tells me, don't build that house there. You know, Build it on some flat rock in the middle of nowhere. All right, so that being said, let's run over here real quick to Kathryn. You're calling from San Francisco. Hey, Katherine, what's on your mind? Hi.

This show is great timing for me. I just took a big risk and moved here with some job possibilities, some connections, but not a job set up.

So.

Certain days I just wake up like, what have I done right?

I think that was one of the analogies I use, like trusting yourself to move across the country and, you know, look for that job. All right, so what, what line of work are you in? What's your field that you're exploring? Two areas.

My own business and event planning. And then I also worked in catering on the side for, you know, kind of part time.

Okay, so you want me to look into your flow, look into the potentials you have rolling around you right now. And you've been out there looking actively, have you?

Yeah, searching. But I. I tend to stop like I see something, then I don't apply for it. I don't submit my resume.

Yeah. One of the things I feel like you've got going on inside you is you have a. Is this the right one? Question constantly. Well, what if I get it then? What if it's the wrong one? Well, I better not. Well, what if I get that one, but then it turns out to be the wrong one? What if I should have waited and gotten that other one instead? Right? It's almost like self doubt is crippling you before you even have a chance. What a strange thing. You, you want work, you want a job. But what if it's the bad job? What if it's a bad job? What if you don't like the job? What if you have to quit the job? What if the job doesn't work out. It's like you've already gone there in your head.

Before I even apply?

Yeah, before you even apply. So instead it's like you're just kicking back, going, well, when the right one comes along, I'll know it. It's going to be like a cherry pie in my face. I will absolutely see it. Yet I would encourage you not to take that approach because it's like there have been a couple cherry pies floating past on your conveyor belt here in front of you. The opportunities that you've had. And speaking of it is a trust issue. You're not really sure that you trust yourself. What if I get into a job and then I can't get out of it again? Have you had that happen before where you've gotten into work and you're like, ugh, I want to quit. I can't quit. I can't get out of it. It's a funny feeling, this worry there. Fear.

Yeah.

Mm. You don't want to be trapped. Don't want to be trapped. You don't want to be trapped again. Recreating the trap out here in San Francisco, right? Isn't that what you tried to move away from the trap? So your flow dream here is I trust myself that whatever jobs I apply to will be the right ones. And of all of those that I apply to, only the very best one or two is going to say yes to me and I to them. I trust the whole process. I can get through the first step. I get through the second step. I get through the interview. I can go all the way up to the end of this process fully trusting this will be the right one. I'm not judging it from the beginning. I'm letting go completely. I'm saying, all right, everybody in, all of you guys who are looking for someone like me, head my way. I'm heading your way. And I'm going to give every single one of you a shot. I'm going to go for it. And I'm not going to say, oh, I don't have time. Oh, I've got to customize my resume too much. Oh, I've got. I'm gonna let go of all of those excuses that are keeping me out of the game. And I'm gonna embrace and I'm trusting if I do this, the winner is gonna rise to the top. Okay, Feel that. Alright. Feel that when you float him. Alrighty.

Mm. Yeah, it's a lot more. I get a lot farther with that. Definitely.

Yeah, you do. All right, Katherine. Thank you, I'm gonna let you go. Thank you. Good luck. I wish you quite well with your job. All right, quick break. When we get back, I think we're going to do a little flow dream and if we have time for Lisa, I'll get to you. But we got to take a quick break first. Stay with me. Oh, we're on break again.

So while you're waiting, here are a few suggestions I think you'll get a lot out of. First, on my website@flowdreaming.com you can pick up a free gift basket or gift bag, however you want to look at it right now from me. I put together a 30 minute tutorial on how to flow dream and then I gave you a flow dream to start practicing with. This saves me from having to reteach the basics on every show and it gives you the first step to creating a freaking amazing new life.

So find this free gift from me.

Right now on my homepage. You just pop in your email and I will be able to send it to you pretty quickly.

Right away. Next.

You know what underwrites this podcast? My manifesting shop@flow dreaming.com I have the most amazing playlists there. I've worked hard on these for over a decade. I've tested them all. I know what works. They're on all kind of topics. How to get a new job, how to go bigger, how to lose weight, remove all your blocks around money or opening yourself to the right kind of partner. So much to go through. And the playlists, they are powerful and effective. Crazy effective. In fact, my inbox is full every day with thank you notes from people have used my flow dreams and become lottery winners. They've just gotten married or received huge bonuses. They've cured themselves of depression and health issues. Really is astounding. So go visit the manifesting store@flow dreaming.com and see what you want to begin changing in your life.

Welcome back to Flow Dreaming.

I think we have just enough time.

To take Lisa on. Hey Lisa, how are you? Hi. Hi.

I just wanted to thank you first. I talked to you once before on the animal massage therapist that was having some trouble getting things done and gave me a slow dream to try and find fears. I found some good ones and I'm doing things but today, more important, my dad has cancer. He dad and I'm trying to spend healing overnight reiki and slow and other things I do. And I'm just wondering if you can tell me, give me any guidance about any other ways I can help him.

What's your Dad's name Harold. And what kind of cancer?

Esophageal. Metastasized to include.

Okay, I'm just going to go take a quick peek at him, see how he's doing. You know, in his mind right now. I'm saying hi to him. He's a nice man. His feeling. He's got a lot of acceptance around this right now. It's sort of like in his head he's going, yep, knew it was going to happen. Figured something like this, it's always going to be something. There's a bit of surprise, like, well, I guess it's. Now, what did you want me to ask him about again or do for him? I'm sorry. I just started chatting with him.

It's odd for me because I don't have a premonition of a bad outcome and the odds are really, really low. But I feel often I know these things and I feel okay about it. I don't know if I'm deluding myself and he's pretty helpful. I don't know if he's deluding himself, but just how I can most. How it be best to support him toward whatever. Best outcome we can hope for.

Yeah, you know, maybe that's the happiness that you're sensing from him. He really hit his. It's a sense of self acceptance. This is where I am. This is what I'm dealing with. This is it. We're going to be okay with this. It's going to be okay the whole way we go. You know, his head feels like most days at least, he's pretty much on straight with it. I'm not going to look in and say, which way is this going to go for him? That would be unfair to everybody to try and, you know, influence the situation by me telling you, you know, what you could do with him, whether you're in person or not in person, I would be saying things like, everything that's happening right now is the smoothest and the easiest and for the highest good. Meaning that if a new doctor needs to step in, boom, it's just done. We didn't even realize it had to be done, but it just happens. We're being taken care of and looked after in ways that we don't even comprehend how much we are being cared for right now. How his life is going to either get alleviated and be better, feel better, or how he will sort of work with this until he's done. Whatever way it goes. It's the very best, though, that could happen for him and to him know What? I mean, it's a sense. It's an emotional feeling of being on the highest, highest, highest, highest, highest, highest, best place. Nothing happens that is wrong. Bad takes us off track, takes him out of alignment, confuses things, allows things to happen that shouldn't happen. No, that energy is completely out, gone. That's not in our life. I don't know why, but I feel like that's the biggest and best thing you can do with him right now. Keep it high, high, high.

That's very helpful.

Thank you, Lisa. Thank you so much for your call. Bite, Harold too. Nice, man. Okay, we're gonna do a flow right now. We have a couple of minutes. About five, we'll do a quickie, quickie flow, dream. These are not meditation, hypnosis, affirmations, any of those. They can feel a bit like meditation if you're used to meditating. The big major difference is that you're going to be very emotional. Less words, more feeling. Yes, we use some pictures sometime because I'm trying to get you to go into a daydream so I can detach your mind from the here and now. Get you into an altered state almost instantly. That's what daydreams are, altered states. You don't have to try to get there. They just happen for you. So we use some visuals, and you're going to recognize that the feeling of flow is there. There is a current, a direction, a trajectory. I'm in it. And when I'm fully aligned in it, everything just works out for me. My choices reflect beautiful outcomes constantly. Because that is what I'm intending, that is what I want. And if I turn to swim and turn around and swim the other direction, yeah, it's going to get harder. I recognize I'm kind of going against my natural flow, my natural development. Fighting for things, hanging on to things, grabbing on. I don't like doing that too much. I like to let things develop, be easy, unfold for me. I like to scoop them up, take them, enjoy them, taste them, and then move into some other new area of experience that I can do the same thing with. All right, so eyes are closed, and you're relaxing. Deep breath and letting it out. And already what pops up in your mind is that walled tower, little tiny fortress. And you're looking at it and you're thinking, what have I put in there? What part of me did I put in there? What part of me said, uh, you're not gonna hurt me again? Nope, nope. Because I'm this way, you're that way. This always happens all of those reasons and sayings and feelings that popped that part of the me in the tower that was like the judge and the jury. I didn't even know they were there and they did it. But I want to bring that part of me out again, and I'm starting to whisper to it. You know what? Do you want to learn how to trust? Do you want to learn how to have a relationship that is what you're needing? Do you want to work in a place that is fulfilling you? Do you want to have harmony with people you love and care about? Do you want to cultivate some of those kinds of relationships? You can. You know, you've wrongly characterized them as all the same type or color. It's untrue. That's like saying every single bird is blue. Birds come in all colors. If you want to have trusting relationships, you can. And you can have bunches of them and there's nothing wrong with you that prevents you from having them. Nothing at all. Do you want that? And what do you feel? What does your heart say? Is it leaping up? Is it starting to clap its hands? Is it like telling a kid that they've just won a thousand gumballs, that they can eat them all at once? Is that the feeling of, oh, you're kidding me. Really? I can trust. I can have wonderful, good relationships filled with reliance and intimacy and communication and everything will work out, Really. I do. I do. I want some of those. You're right. Not all birds are blue. They're red and they're. And they're orange and they're yellow and they're black and they're gray and they're brown. I want some of those relationships. I want trusting relationships. I want them to practice on, and I want a bunch of them, and I want them now.

I want them now.

I have them now. I'm committing to them now, and I am reopen to them now with a big burst from your heart. Yes, I am. Your flow dream closes. Then you open your eyes. That was a very, very brief, brief flow dream. Too brief. But if you want bigger and better ones, go to my website, flow dreaming.com. you can find several there that work with trust playlists for going big and developing these kinds of yummy, trusting relationships. Okay, Love to you all. I will see you all next week for another episode of Flow Dreaming. Well, look at that. Show's over.

But before you go, did you know that my mom has a podcast, too? Her show airs live right after mine. It comes up next. We tape our live shows back to back. Her show is called the Dear Venus show, so stay listening and you can call in or look it up live on itunes if you're listening via podcast.

Her show's really good.

It's really funny, and she reads people's minds and futures and talks to dead people for real. It's called the Dear Venus show on itunes.