#463 You Are Not the Person Someone Else Said you Were

Flow Dreaming.

It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does. It gives you a feeling of power again in your lives. Oh, my God.

You were so on target.

You are so amazing. I can't thank you enough. Breathe. It is the feeling that you bring forward. It is your emotional connection that really sets the tone for what is going to be happening to you and for you. And you know that feeling, when you touch it, it just spreads through you. Thank you for taking my call.

I don't know why I feel like crying.

I think I just feel your love.

Of course.

And I think I'm gonna get some ANSWERS.

I'm Summer McStravik and welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Welcome to Flow Dreaming. The f. Before we get started, a really quick note. If you found this show on itunes or by downloading the Flow Dreaming podcast app, it would mean so much if you took a moment to review it. That is how other people will find this show and get the same great value out of it that I hope you're getting. So my huge thanks and sparkles and flow go to all of you who just take that few moments to go write a quick little message of telling other people. This is good. Go listen. Thanks. Now off we go to the show. That's right. Here we come to the show. I guess I should say welcome, Everybody. I'm Summer McStravik, here to spend another hour with you in Flow. In who we are, what we're becoming, how we use our consciousness at a much finer level than most people because we are being consciously aware of not just our physical lives, but the non physical life that we are concurrently living. Flow Dreaming, the name of the show, refers to a technique that I use to sculpt my life, sculpt the universe. It's something you can learn pretty darn quickly. It's based on daydreaming, not meditation. So most people just naturally fall right into the technique. But once you learn that, all kinds of other things begin coming up for you. Like is this law of attraction? Or why am I not getting what I'm asking for? Or why are you talking so much about mindset, personal power? We go off in all directions. That's where the real growth and learning takes place. When you begin to study Flow Dreaming. So if you're new, the reason I'm saying this is I encourage you. Go to my website. And you'll be able to find a free. It's like a gift bag of downloadable materials that will teach you how to flow dream. And once you get that down, a lot of everything else we're talking about will make increasingly larger amounts of sense to you. Basically, my business is to reshape my life and help other people completely reshape theirs from the inside out. So we explore all kinds of different topics every week on this podcast. There's a different topic that you're going to hear me just kind of sometimes riff about. Sometimes I'm teaching, sometimes I'm just, you know, exploring. I also like to take your calls, so don't be shy. If you go to my website, you're going to find the live call in number. The show actually tapes as a live radio broadcast every Tuesday at 12 noon Pacific Time. That has been my time slot for 10 years, actually. I don't think I've ever moved. Tuesday at noon. I know what I'm doing every week of the year. So anyway, that's the time you can call in and talk to me. We also will do a flow dream a little later on in the show so you can get that experience of what it really does feel like. Today's show is really interesting and it was sparked by a suggestion that came in on my Facebook page. Every now and then I basically create a list of show topics, usually two or three months in advance, and I'll post to my Facebook page, hey, what do you guys want me to talk about? What do you want to hear about? And there was a really interesting suggestion that came up, caught my attention. Someone was saying how she felt like she knew who she used to be and she didn't feel like that person anymore, but she wasn't sure who she was becoming. And I thought about that. Yeah, the hazy middle when you're not who you were, not the person that did all those things they were supposed to do or you know, the things even they weren't supposed to do, but they knew they'd do because someone said that that's how they were and they had to do them. Where do you go when your identity starts to change? When your sense of who I am starts to grow and evolve? Now this does tie into manifesting. Everything ties into manifesting, everything ties into flow. Because, well, the way I look at things is that you are energy being, right? Throw in some fluffy woo language, you're an energy being in the most literal sense. You are packed together molecules. That's your body. It's energy Right. If you looked way, way, way in, you would see nothing but little spinning bits of information. Energy, for lack of a better word, data, you can call it data, information. And from the body, from the physical, there are gradations of this energy. Right? Imagine, you know, let's see, what's a good picture? You know those child's kids, those kids toys, the rings. Like you have the big red ring at the bottom, the yellow ring on top of that, the orange ring, the green ring, the blue ring. They get smaller and smaller and smaller as they stack on each other. Think of your body as the red ring at the bottom. Physical, biggest, solid, dense. Yet you have that tiniest ring at the very top. The most non physical aspect of you, the most energetically diffuse, fine, not packed together, part of you. Now, people have historically called this the body and the soul, and the intellect is somewhere in those middle rings. Flow philosophy would say that it's all you, all you, more than just the physical. The consciousness is in the physical, but it's also out of the physical bridges out of the physical into the non physical. You really, you are a string of energies all tied together at the same time. All of these energies are active. That means the soul self is having its own kind of life. And you're somewhat aware of it because you can feel it sometimes it guides you. But you're not as aware of it as your physical self because the pinpoint of your consciousness is more firmly located right now inside the physical self. So what does this mean? I know this is getting very philosophical. What does this mean? As you start to grow and change, think about your body. Your body changes your entire life. It's in a constant state of change. If your body stopped changing, we would be flabbergasted, just shocked. What? Wow, you haven't aged in 20 years. No, seriously, you still look like you're 15. What's going on? Your body is constantly evolving forward and it's on an arc, right? A growth arc. It has an end point built into it. What about the rest of you? Don't you think that's growing and evolving too? Is there an endpoint to that? I don't think it's tied to the body's endpoint because the kind of work I do, looking in people's minds flows, dead or alive. I haven't yet found someone who was dead saying, yeah, I got another endpoint coming up. I've been looking for that. It's a very serious question, do dead people die? Again, I have not yet seen any evidence of that. So this you is continually growing as well. The intellect, the consciousness, the spirit, soul, self, higher self, whatever you want to call it. How is it growing? Right. The body, you can tell, is obviously growing. You know, your nose keeps growing as you get, your ears get bigger, you're aging. I see the flow self. I'm going to call it the flow self. Right. Not spirit or soul or any of that. Let's just jump into some new lingo completely so you can kind of expand the way you think about it for just a little bit here. The flow self has a past, a present, and it has a horizon of expansion that it's moving into. How is it actually growing? Well, you're accumulating experiences first and foremost. Every day. Stuff is coming into your life that you're encountering, reacting to, creating change with every reaction you have is adding a bit to you. Right? Because now, you know, this is what I do when XYZ happens. Oh, that's what I do when, you know, another XYZ happens. Self knowledge is increasing every day. Self knowledge, where do you think that goes in a non physical world? It's still data, it's still information. And this is happening whether you try for it or not. When I first realized that, like really thought about it really tripped me out for a while. I'm growing whether I like it or not. I'm evolving whether I like it or not. And that's what really made me laser in on, well, shoot, if I'm doing this anyway, maybe I should do it with a little more conscious choice. Maybe I should be kind of keeping my eye on the ball. It was a sense of, it's like I'm driving a car every day and I've had my eyes closed. No wonder I'm crashing into everything and going off road and, you know, always getting myself stuck places. What happens if I open my eyes to that? I'm growing every day because of the experiences that I create. I attract and I respond to. Ah, you see how this changes the flavor of your manifesting. You start to really sit up and go, whoa. So let's go back to my Facebook friend who pointed out I'm not who I used to be, but I don't yet know who I'm becoming. We form our identities right from the day we're born. You know, if I was a cultural or social anthropologist, I'd have so much to say about your environment, your conditioning, your upbringing, on and on and on. Yeah, we are all products of our environment without a doubt. Right. We were, you know, biologically born to fit our tribe. Because the better we fit our tribe, the more likely that we would, you know, live, survive, that they would feed us, protect us. Fitting in became really, really important. And if we really fit in well and, and went to the top of the heap, then we got to procreate. So you can see there's a biological drive to fit in to who is surrounding you. This is why in the world of energy, who is surrounding you is incredibly important. And when your identity starts to change, it's often because the people around you have started to shift in and out and you're finding a new tribe. And we do this all through our life. Our family's our tribe. And then maybe you've moved away, maybe you moved to a new city and got a job, maybe you met a guy or a girl and moved to their town or their state, maybe you went to college, you started acquiring all of these new tribes and starting to fitting into those. Eventually you reach a point where you realize, everywhere I go, I'm just fitting into what's around me. So I better be really aware of what's around me because I will fit into that. So what happens when you fit into these different social groups, these different tribes? Well, first of all, these people are all containing energy. I had a great experience this weekend. My mi school class. I brought both of my classes together and treated them to a three day event at La Costa Spa here in San Diego. World class Spa. Deepak Chopra's headquarters for his spa work and meditations retreats. It was fantastic. Not just because we were at a gorgeous place, but because in the room around me I had like 60 or 70 people all of the same energy. This is a true self created tribe. That means you can't be in a room like that and be not affected, not impacted by how everyone else around you is thinking and feeling. And when everyone is going up, up, up and getting more and more conscious and getting more and more strong, whoa, you just changed. You can't help it. You don't even have to try to change. You change, you change. So if you're looking back, if you are looking back and saying, well, you know, I'm not the girl who my mom said had to do this and that and get married and have the kids and I that and I'm done with that and that didn't work out so well. And then I'm not, you know, I'm no longer the, you know, the bank teller and the accountant or the pharmacist or the, you know, I realize I'm actually an artist, but I just went to the safe thing because that's what my early tribe told me. This is where you're really starting to stretch and define yourself outside of your tribe on your own. This is where you reach a point in your life where maybe you've done something. You've all had this experience, you do something, and you are absolutely shocked. You did that. Like, whoa, was that me? Who am I that I did that? Sometimes it's really cool. Things like, whoa, I jumped out of an airplane with a parachute. Was that really me? Sometimes it's really crummy. Things like, whoa, I cheated on my partner. I can't believe I did that. I can't believe I'm okay with having done that. Right. You can go. You can really trip yourself out as you grow and explore and experience. I'm not saying any of these things is necessarily okay, but there are continuous moments you have in your life that wake you up to the fact that you're not always who you think you are. You are not always who you think you are, and you are especially not what other people think you are. You are not what other people think you are. I think I did a podcast, an episode, rather a couple months ago, where I asked a bunch of my friends what they thought I was like, and I was really shocked at how different all of their impressions of me were because, you know, I know what I'm like, right? Don't I Made me wonder, because the responses they were giving to me were very different. I'd say I'm a pretty closed person, you know, I'm not very sharing about myself, my life, and they would respond, oh, my God, you say more about yourself than anybody. I do. It's an interesting exercise. You have to be willing to, you know, put on your big girl pants, get a thick skin to do it, and your friends will choose their words carefully, believe me. But it helps you really see that, huh? Maybe what my mom thinks of me is more about my mom than it is about truly me. Everyone is looking at me through a filter of their own personal experience, which may or may not accurately capture me. So if I am basing myself and my actions and my decisions on what other people think I should do, I'm basically basing a lot of my decisions on falsity, write on thoughts and presumptions that may not fit me at all. Yet I have believed that I should listen, and I should do that. Now. Why do we do that? Because, you know, it makes us feel good to think Someone else has already worked this all out for me. Right? A lot of religious teachings are that way. They say, don't question, it just is. Believe this, this is right. This was worked out thousands of years ago. And you could say, oh, good, I don't have to pursue that one. I don't have to think about that one. Same is true with the, you know, the teachings your parents gave you growing up. You know, never move in with someone first. Always get married. Why? Because that's tradition. Why? Because tradition is good. Why? Because tradition means that it's worked out before like this. And, you know, that's. That's the way it's supposed to be. Because. And, you know, thousands of people have done it, and that's what everybody decided. Well, we all know that sometimes what thousands of people do is not good. Think genocide, think war, think social repression, think bigotry. It's not always good. And here you are trying to weave your way through the middle. I think if anything, that I want you to get from today's podcast to think about your identity, your flow. The person that you are emerging into is this. The person that you were told you were by other people is probably not the person you really are. And it's well worth the hunt to find out all the things you think about yourself that aren't actually your own feelings about yourself. In other words, you have adopted other people's beliefs about you. Oh, honey, you're so good at science. You should be a scientist. Maybe you're just good at cataloging and organizing things. Maybe you should be a librarian. In their filtered world, you should be a scientist because that's what they immediately go to. So why are you getting that science degree? Why aren't you getting into books? The other thing I want you to realize is that you are constantly emerging into a new self. Constantly. The cells in your body are rapidly turning over even now as we speak. You guys have all seen those studies of, you know, like, the cells in your mouth turn over the fastest, cells in your heart or bones turn over at slower rates, et cetera. Well, your energetic self, your emerging self, your identity self, is likewise constantly turning over, emerging into the next iteration of who you are. The revised version, your revisions, are happening every moment because every second, you're having new information put into you. And not only that, but this is good. This is required. You were built to be this way for a particular reason, right? This means growing is good, expanding is good, or you would have been built not to do it. Your set, your cells, you know, turn over. Because you need new, fresh ones all the time to be functional and optimal. Your self perception is always renewing, increasing, expanding, because it too needs to always be fresh and ready to absorb new experiences. So if you're holding on to stuff behind you, it gets harder to push into what's coming. When you experience something inside yourself that is surprising, probably means you've gone into new territory. If you went, whoa, I didn't know I was going to jump out of that airplane. Wow, I didn't realize this art class was going to be so enriching. Gosh, I never realized that I actually could tell my friends this. That's growth. That's growth. If you find yourself never experiencing that surprise about yourself, it's probably because you are hanging out in the land of the familiar. The familiar is not growth. The familiar means, I've tread this ground before. I've been treading it for a long time. It's familiar. Sometimes we want to be in familiar because familiar is where we can deepen something. It's where we can go from amateur to pro. You just deepen the experience. You keep cultivating it over and over, refining it. Right. Think of a, you know, a tennis player constantly practicing, practicing that swing, practicing that swing. It's very familiar. But every now and then, even that tennis star is breaking through to a new level and saying, wow, something just happened that shifted my whole game. You've had that happen. Shifted my whole game. Just a little tweak, a little adjustment. Whoa, Familiar still grows into unfamiliar. Then it becomes familiar again. This is a direct correlation to the way manifesting works. That was another conversation I had with my class this weekend. Comes up, what happens if you're constantly creating? Well, you are constantly creating. You can't help it. But sometimes you shift into familiar creation. What's that? Contentment. We create things so that we can become and feel content with them. If you don't ever stop for the contentment, then you become on an endless wheel of creation without acknowledging it, without acknowledging yourself within it, without giving the love to yourself, the appreciation to yourself, the, ah, this feels really good. It's a balance, my friends. It is a balance. It's a seesaw. It's the beautiful scales of maybe not justice, but of creation. Creation, experience, creation, experience, back and forth. And as a person, as a personality, as an identity, you're doing the same thing. You're creating yourself over and over. And then you're getting content with what you've just made inside yourself. And after a while you say, I'm Ready to create some more. I wonder who I'll be, you know, in five years. I don't know who I'm going to be. I really don't. And I mean that in every possible way. I expect some things will still be in my life. My kids, my husband, my family, my friends. But I don't know. I may live in a new house, I may have new friends. I may have new work. I don't know. I don't know what I'm going to evolve into and change into. And I look forward to that. Because if I look back five years ago, I'm even more happy than I was then. If you are looking back on your life and saying, no, I was actually happier five years ago than I am today, then this is your call to action. Get a jump on your flow. Get a jump on who you are becoming. It's not going to happen for you, right? Life will happen to you if you just slip into default mode. But if you really want to be part of the person you're becoming, consciously emerging into, step up. I know that sounds obvious, but you wouldn't believe how often we sit around just waiting for things to happen to us, to turn the tide for us. We wait there passively. We don't even know we're doing it. Step up. Step in. Commit. I'm changing myself and here is how I'm changing. And here is how I'm going to feel. And this is who I'm becoming. If you don't do this, no one else can do it for you. No one else can do it for you. So think on that as we go to a quick break. When we get back, I'm going to check and see. Do we have calls? Yes, indeed we do. We'll take a couple calls. I will look at you. I'll look at your identity. I'll look in your flow. I'll look in the minds personalities flows of anybody that you have an interest in. So stay with me for more right after this.

It's summer and while we're on break, have you checked out MI school? In MI School, we travel together over a year. Through everything that you are, you get to discover what drives you, how you're made and how powerful you actually are. We play with intuition and flow dreaming and you get to see exactly how you're continually co creating your future. Aren't you curious what you're doing? I ask you to bring two big goals to the table and you reach them using tools you've probably never been exposed to before. If you're curious, go to flowdreaming.com and click on MI School. Set up a call and either I or one of my team will help you see exactly what you can do with your life. And if you choose to join me school, well, then I look forward to spending this year with you. Live. As we work together to create miracles.

There's a lot of you guys hanging on the line. Are we all so identity confused? Well, if you are, I think that's a good thing. What do you think of that? Right, because it means you're really moving into new territory and understanding yourself more. You are truly in sync with your evolution of where you should be going. Let's start with Lisa Vancouver. Hey, Lisa.

Hi, Summer. Thank you for taking my call.

Sure. What's up in your life?

Well, question about looking for work. I'm in a situation now where I kind of need to find something quickly. And that puts me in kind of a weird frame of mind because I'm looking for work that I haven't really done before. Minimal type of work. I actually had an interview yesterday, but it's kind of a. And I haven't heard anything. And it's kind of a difficult job and I'm not even sure about it. And I went in just wanting to get more information about the job because I felt like I didn't even have it. So that's kind of iffy at best.

Tell me about the job because you're kind of going all around it. I don't. I don't even know what you're actually going for.

Well, it's a. Legal type position in a city legal office. Okay. And it came up through an agency. I have gotten lots of work through agencies, different types of administrative. I mean, it could be a good job. It's. And someone is taking a leave for three months. I know they're trying to find someone quickly.

What's your fear about this? What's the concern?

Well, when they described the part of it, there's a lot of liability involved with a particular job and it wasn't clear that the support or training would be there. And then you're working for attorneys. And so it's like having not. It's like they were saying if you make one little mistake.

The world collapses.

Well. Or that they're kind of on the ropes or they can they start getting penalties. And so, I mean, it sounded very.

So you're afraid. Yeah. You're afraid to take on this level of responsibility for a temp job where you won't even be Learning exactly what to do until you're halfway through the temp position.

Yeah. It's like, sure, if the support is there, fair enough. Learning, getting a handle on it.

Why don't I do two things? One, I'll look at the potential job and see what that workplace actually feels like, what goes on there.

The people were positive. I mean, I have to say that it was otherwise, it was a pleasant interview and conversation and not easy to talk to four people at once. But.

Let me see if I can find it. You haven't given me a name, so I'm going to have to kind of go through you. Skipping stones is what I call it. As I look through your connection, your energy connection to this place. First thing I'm seeing right off the bat is you're building this up in your mind bigger than it's supposed to be. Right. Because when I looked at it, it was. Didn't carry the weight of expectation that you're afraid of. Your fear is greater than mountains out of molehills.

Okay, okay.

So there's an aspect of that going on. They expect precision. They expect very conscientious work. If that is apparent and a mistake comes up as a result, they're forgiving. It's the fact that if you are not detailed and conscientious, they will not be forgiving. It's very fair. It feels very fair. Now, let's see, is there support for you? It looks like, to a degree, feeling like there's actually about two people, at least two people you can call on who each have different roles that can kind of instruct you. They will expect you to pick up a lot on your own. That's true. Other people are busy. It is not their number one duty or joy to have to train a temp person. I guess that goes without saying. Right? If you want this job, you have to shift your thinking right now out of bracing. I call it bracing for lack. Right? The lack thinking in this is I'm not going to get the support I need. I'm going to screw up. They're going to be angry and unhappy with me. Maybe I should duck this one altogether. That's lack thinking and it's not appropriate here because flow has brought you something. Why not play it out to the end, right? Once they hire you, if it really doesn't work out, you guys are going to know within a week. You'll know within a week. It'll be very clear to everyone and then you can make the appropriate moves. So you have to really get inside yourself instead and say, is this a job that I would learn from? Is this a job that would fit my circumstances right now? Is this a job that will take care of something that I need taken care of in my life? Do I want it? Can you say yes to all of those?

I'm not sure. I mean, it sounded like in some ways an impossible situation, but without having more information, and yet if it wasn't bad, it could be good because I'm really in a position where I need something stable.

So that's part of why this is coming up. If you don't really want the position, your mind is going to come up with everything it can do to convince you why you shouldn't take the position. And that's where the molehills are coming. Mountains out of molehills are coming up. So that's why you need to back away from the anticipating lack in the job and the fear of the job and get down with yourself. Like, why am I actually going for this job? Do I want it? Or am I just going here? Because I've got fear pushing me from the other direction. I've got lack. Fear of lack coming, you know, from behind me and in front of me. There's this fear that the job's not going to work and I'm going to screw it up and they're not going to be good to me. You're facing both directions. You're anticipating lack of. That's the biggest thing to resolve right now. Got it. I gotta let you go, my dear. Otherwise we would go into a whole session. There's more to go, but this is like. Pull on that thread. Okay. Keep thinking about it. Thanks, Lisa. Oh, looks like you dropped off anyway. Okay, let's go to Tamra. Oh, in San Diego. Hey, Tamara, what's up?

Hi, Summer.

Hi.

I'm very glad I called in today. This is definitely where I am right now with identity not knowing. I also wanted to know about career. I've been at my current job for four years and if I could give my notice today, I would love to to have a new job. I'm really wanting help. I'm very indecisive. I have tons of interest, so I find it hard to find focus on my next move.

Okay, so you don't like where you are now?

No.

It doesn't fit the person that you have become over the last four years. Your call is great because it reminds everybody. We grow out of jobs. As we grow, things that we acquired in our life four years ago don't always fit us. Ditto for husbands, partners, wives, boyfriends, girlfriend. Right. We grow out of relationships. Fortunately, our partners are also growing usually, and will grow with us if they don't. That's why we end up breaking up. Jobs and workplaces sometimes grow with us, but sometimes they don't. They're bigger organizations. They've got more things that they're factoring in. It's not just one person devoted to you. Right. Usually we are more devoted to our job than our job is devoted to us. And so you could easily grow out of a workplace, and that's what you're describing. So you have a lot of interest and you're not sure what you're growing into, Is that right? Yes. Okay, I guess my question is, of the multiple interests you have, why aren't you just picking one and going with it to see how it works? Are you afraid that you're going to make the wrong choice?

Well, I did, yes, but I did. Well, one is money. The area I'd like to go into or that I have an interest in is working with international. International people in the US And I did actually just meet somebody and they connected me over the weekend with somebody. So I'm going to try that route. But I didn't know so many times in the past when I've seen it, it's just always been so low income, and I don't want to have to take a significant salary decrease to go into that field.

Mm, okay, fair. So what I'd like to see you do is start to unlock your thinking, meaning this is what your current thinking is. I love this line of work. However, it's such a low income line of work, I can't give myself to it. That is a paralyzing energy flow. Right. Because it's a push and a pull at the same time, which locks you in a dead standstill in the middle. I'm thinking about past clients I've had who worked for international organizations that were relief organizations, that were lobbying groups for organizations who made extraordinary amounts of money. And the reason this is popping in my head is because I'm hearing and feeling from you this desire for international reach, for expanse, for gosh. I just met a woman a few weekends ago at a baby shower who works on behalf of immigrants coming into the country. And she does great. She does great. She has a very decent income. So I guess I'm bringing these examples up because if you want to move into this, you have to start saying to yourself, there is a place for me, there is a position for me where I Earn exactly what I need or maybe a little bit more. And I fully believe this. And I know that there are people and jobs that will pay less and there are people who will take those jobs. Those jobs aren't my jobs because this entire industry is not absolutely low paying. There are high paying jobs. I just have to navigate to them, and as soon as I do, I can stop navigating and take it very straightforward. Do you feel that energy?

Absolutely, yes.

Okay, Tamara, so close your eyes with me real quick. Let's do a sample. An example of flowing, this feeling. Deep breath, relaxing. And in your mind, we're going straight into flow here you are looking around your life. You can see your home around you. You see yourself. You're doing something very normal for some reason. It's just an average regular day. Maybe you're in the kitchen puttering around, and you're thinking about the new line of work that's lining up for you. This line of work that is challenging your skills, that's up, leveling you, that's paying you way more than you thought they were going to pay you. That's the biggest surprise. You just grin to yourself. You're just smiling. You're doing a little hop, happy, hoppy dance around the kitchen. You are getting paid very well to learn something new. How lucky are you? How lucky are you? Yet when you look at the job, they seem to think it's great. They're looking for talented people like you, that they can train into this, that they can train up in this. They're looking for people to go up into leadership positions in this. They're looking and they found you. And they think to themselves, wow, we can really do something with her. And you're saying, yes, you sure can. Because I am that kind of material. I am of that value, that worth. And I stepped in and I showed up, and we match. We fully match. Okay, open your eyes. That was an example of an emotional, energetic connection with where you want to go. Did you feel it?

I did.

Thank you so much. Summer, that was amazing.

When you said you're smiling, I actually had a giant smile on my face.

As you were saying that. Of course. Great. All right, my dear, thanks for calling in and I wish you all the best. This doesn't feel out of reach for you at all. It feels very much within your realm of what comes next. Okay, wonderful.

Thank you, Sommer.

You're so welcome. Take care, my dear. All right, we have a quick break again when we get back. I think I have time for another call and a Flow Dream, where we get to grow into the 2.0 version of ourselves. So stay with me. We'll be right back.

Hey, it's summer on break and just wanted to tell you this podcast, it is supported entirely by flowdreaming.com my website, where you can find hundreds of very cool Flow Dreams to purchase and download so you can begin reinventing every aspect of your life. And one thing you should really pick up is the free Flow Dreaming introduction kit. It's@flow dreaming.com too, and it teaches you this remarkable technique in detail and fast. So go to flowdreaming.com, get it now. And, and while you're there, check out my blog as well.

Lots of love.

Now, back to the show.

Back to the program. Indeed, we do have time for a call. So that means that Cynthia. It looks like California. Random city in California. Cynthia, welcome to the show.

Hey, that's me.

Yay.

Well, I listen to your show and you sound so much like me.

Thank you.

I look for somebody like me all the time.

Yeah, we are rare birds, I'll tell you that.

And I'm out here and, and I, I'm. I'm really happily married. But, you know, marriages take your challenges. We had our child and she's 13 and she's making straight A's. All, that's all good and everything. But the challenges came in.

I have a 12 year old girl who's also making straight A's, so. See? Familiar, familiar.

But, you know, it went to, you know, you know, we went into the marriage that were. No, we're all equal and everything, and, and we, we still, you know, tried to live that, but we went into business together and we shut down business together. But what happened in the business was, you know, the male was the superior.

Mm.

And so I never really, even though I'm forgiving and going past that and because I'm the healer in the family, because I make change, everybody else follows. But I am so frightened of change sometimes.

Yeah.

Even though I'm doing it because I'm doing it alone. It's like I have nowhere to turn. But, yeah, through all the seminars and all the books, and that's all I do. I listen every day.

You picked up, you picked up on something really good right there. You said, because you are the healer, you change first, so everyone else can change. That right there means you're not alone. You're really not.

No, they follow. They're following.

When you change, they are forced to respond to you differently. You are disallowing People to remain in their old habits and patterns around you, not because you've changed them, but because they just can't respond the same way that they used to to you.

What happens is they try to get their old pattern back in when I'm in the home environment and then I have to leave it and then come back to hold my spot.

You're just a bit worn out from all of this.

Yeah. It's been a long haul. But I see that you're taking place.

Honestly, you're worn out. You had the challenge with your husband in your business where you lost a little love for him. Let's put it that way.

I lost self esteem for myself. I lost believing in myself. I gave up everything to the bottom of the ground where they just named it fibromyalgia. But that's all an emotional based thing. I do not believe I have this for life.

What did I just say? You're exhausted. Fibromyalgia, exhaustion. Your body, your body just reiterated it for you.

Yeah.

So look at this. Like, this is fabulous because you just saw something in yourself. This is what I will give up. I wonder why I did that. I've seen that. Do I have to keep doing that now that I've seen it? No, I don't. Let's flip this around in your head too. You have revealed to yourself where you go small and give up your power. And it was such a devastating experience that. And remember, you brought this level of devastation to yourself.

Yeah.

Because you're probably so stubborn. This is what happens. Stubborn people. You have to bring it in a big way. And you did. Yeah. So this doesn't have to happen again.

Never.

Nope, doesn't have to happen again. So this is where you're now on the rebuilding port part. Right. Regaining the energy, regaining the focus, saying, uh, I saw what I did. That is not the person I am becoming. Right. That is a very old person that I slipped into that pattern. It surfaced. I saw the sucker, I grabbed it and I choked it.

That's right. Mine and all the past generations too.

Yep. Yeah, this is. And sometimes they say that, you know, you're not just breaking your own pattern. It's a generational pattern. It's deep. And you've done that.

Listen, with my mom, she revealing part of her side. And I'm going, oh, that's yours. Okay, bye.

Yeah. Yeah. So your next step is to rebuild. You're already in rebuilding. Rebuilding your health, rebuilding your sense of strength, confidence, security. Rebuilding your ability to say to your husband, honey, I love You. But you know what? Wow. We just brought out things in me that I never realized could be so big and huge and devastating. And I'm done with that. And so here's where I'm going. Are you going to go there with me? Because you know I have to heal at this point, right? I've got some major healing today.

I said, I'm not doing this no more. I go, I'm going back to who you met. And I go, this is who you met?

Absolutely.

Because I tried to, you know, you try to change, to please them. And it's like, what the hell did I do that for?

Well, and you know what? I'm sure it didn't ended up pleasing him. I'm sure it didn't end up at all.

No, it didn't. It didn't. It's like the more he thinks he wants me to do something, I'm going, you think that's going to make you love me more if I do that? I'm sorry, that's not going to make you love me more.

Yeah. Cynthia, all of these things you're saying that are traveling around your head are good things. It's just like you've had so many revelations. It's a question of I need to now get them all settled and deepened inside of me and go and heal from here. So exactly where you are. If you know the position you're in, you already know your next step. You don't even need to ask me. It's right there. You're flow dreaming. I'm not going to let you go. I gotta let you go, honey. But let me just tell you, your dreaming is, I'm healing. I'm growing out of this. I'm so grateful I saw this, so grateful. Because now I know without a shadow of a doubt that that is not who I am. And I will never be that person again. I can only get stronger and I can let my body heal now. And that's what I'm doing. And that's what I'm flow dreaming on. There is a playlist@flowdreaming.com called Reclaim youm Power. Please get that one. It's fabulous for where you're at right now. Okay, we have to go. Thanks, Cynthia. We have to go into a float room. We've only got a few minutes, so I want you to have this experience of getting comfortable with the person you're growing into. Don't fight this person. Don't fight them. You know what I mean by fighting them. Self doubting them, you know Second guessing them, telling them, no, not now. That's you fighting yourself, fighting your own growth. Does that ring a bell? Do we do that sometimes? Yeah. Stop. The only time you want to fight the person you're becoming is if the person you're becoming is truly a big, you know, toad. If they're really a jerk, then yeah, rein that in. But that's not who most of us are becoming. We're actually getting better. And that's what I'm speaking to. Close your eyes with me right now and we're just going to experience for two or three minutes what it's like to fully release and allow that inner self to go where it wants to go next. And you're going to notice that maybe fear comes up. You're not so sure if you want that inner self to go where it goes next because then you'll have to do things and follow it. If you feel that, that's a big revelation for you. Your eyes are closed and you're relaxed. You're breathing deeply in and out, abdomen and chest swelling and relaxing. And you're feeling yourself release. Let go a leaf on a little stream of water, a gentle, trickling, gurgling stream, and you're the lazy leaf, just being moved along, moved forward in your flow, feeling good, not worrying where the leaf will end up, not second guessing the direction of the current. Is the leaf doing this? No. Is the current going to the right place? Yes. Are you sure it's going to the right place? Yes, always. The stream is going to go to the bigger pool. The bigger pool goes to the bigger river. The bigger river goes to the bigger ocean. The ocean takes that water and brings it right up to the clouds in the sky that rain down into that little stream. This is you. That's you growing. That's you going home. That's you reaching a destination and then reaching another destination and another. Until perhaps you choose to recycle it all and do it again. Who are you becoming? Do you feel this person inside you? Do you feel the wet wings of the butterfly coming out of the cocoon? Would you ever say to the caterpillar, stop, don't do that? No, you'd say, this is what you're supposed to do. This is inevitable for you. You must become something else. You must fly. You must experience this next person that you're going to be. You must surround yourself with the people, the friends, the possibilities, people who think like you, the workplaces that reflect you. This is your job to do this, because your job is to grow, to Acquire to get to know yourself ever deeper and ever better through these experiences. This is your job, your number one job. Everything else under that is number two. You say, well, maybe my kids are my family. Couldn't they be number one? No. They don't want the mother that you were when they were born 15 years ago, 10 years ago, 25 years ago. That woman doesn't know as much as the you today. You have to grow so they can grow behind you. You have to grow ahead of them. You can't just stop. That has to happen first. You have to release yourself into that, allow yourself into that. And you do. You'll feel yourself. It's like cracking open a walnut shell. You're just cracking open into this realization. I am so much bigger. I am so much freer. I just am. I'm becoming flowing. And with that, your flow dream ends, your experience ends, and you open your eyes and there. That's a little taste of what it's like to be changing yourself inside of flow. If that piqued your interest, come to my website, flowdreaming.com and keep listening to more of these podcasts. I will see you next week, same time, same place. Love you all.

That's a wrap for today, but if you want to keep things going, then download my free Flow Dreaming apps. That's right, there's two of them. The first app allows you to listen. Listen to this podcast anywhere you want on your mobile device, as well as search and favorite episodes. The other app hooks you up with my manifesting store, which includes an oracle to help you see what direction you most are in need of right now and advice. You can also sample all kinds of Flow dreams and put together a library of your own. So to find these apps, just. Just search Flow Dreaming in itunes or on your Google app Store.