#483 Super-Duper Self-Trust

Flow Dreaming.

It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does. It gives you a feeling of power again in your lives. Oh, my God.

You were so on target. You are so amazing. I can't thank you enough. Breathe.

It is the feeling that you bring forward. It is your emotional connection that really sets the tone for what is going to be happening to you and for you. And you know that feeling, when you touch it, it just spreads through you. Thank you for taking my call. I don't know why I feel like crying. I think I just feel your love. Of course.

And I think I'm gonna get some ANSWERS.

I'm Summer McStravik, and welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Welcome to Flow Dre. Before we get started, a really quick note. If you found this show on itunes or by downloading the Flow Dreaming podcast app, it would mean so much if you took a moment to review it. That is how other people will find this show and get the same great value out of it that I hope you're getting. So my huge thanks and sparkles and Flow go to all of you who just take that few moments to go write a quick little message of telling other people. This is good. Go listen. Thanks. Now off we go to the show. Here we are. Welcome to Flow Dreaming. Hi, everybody. It's Summer Mixed Ravic, and as always, delighted to be here talking with you about the power of your mind and thoughts and feelings and emotions, and of course, your flow. If you're here for the first time and curious, what is Flow Dreaming? Flow Dreaming is a technique. It's also a mindset, a philosophy, and I think the best way to really plunge in is to go to my website@flowdreaming.com you'll hear an ad during the break for it. But@flowdreaming.com I have a free kit that I've put together. It's free for the time being, but really what it is is a training teaches you how to flow dream, how to get in that space and start making things happen for yourself. Communicating with the universe, with God, with source energy, whatever you want to call it, in such a way that you're truly heard and your desires are acted on and reflected in your life. Meaning, if you want to program your future, use Flow Dreaming. If you want to create a new characteristic inside yourself, use Flow Dreaming. If you want to increase communication or change a relationship with somebody around, you use flow dreaming. It's. It's useful for, gosh, just about everything under the sun. So go check that out. So what we do here in our podcast every week is I explore a concept, an idea, a thought. Usually it's something that's really been catching my attention lately. Often it's fueled by experiences that my students are having right now. And this is just another way in place for me to kind of talk through and walk through some of the ideas that have been popping up as a result of what my students have been facing. And this is all put through the filter of flow dreaming, right? Which includes this kind of universe of techniques now within it, such as, well, what we're going to talk about today, which is self trust, right? Super duper self trust, right? This is, this has been a topic lately. It's been an issue. It's been coming up a lot for my students, especially those who are trying to go big or trying to heal or trying to do both. It seems like if you're in either of those two energies, you're probably going to encounter some revisioning of your inner trust, your self trust. So let's take a look at that this hour and see how it goes. As always, I'll be getting to your calls, live calls. I tape this podcast as a live radio program every Tuesday afternoon. So you can always call in and talk to me, me. And we always do a flow dream together at the end. So stick around and we'll be doing a flow dream to help you increase your self trust. So. Oh, oh, one other little piece of housekeeping I was just about to launch into. MI School is now open. And that's what I'm referring to when I talk about my students. Usually it's my MI school students and my diamond personal coaching students. ME School is a premier online program for reaching in deep into yourself, finding all of your extraordinary talents and assets and understanding how to use them, how to have the flow, see them, how to have the universe offer you up things where your next step is. Gosh, it's just, it's. I can't even describe it in like 20 seconds. So just go check it out online. MI school registration is currently open. The school usually only opens once a year, so you might want to jump on it if you're interested. Okay. Self trust is part of the big three. The big three mamas. I call them self love, self trust and self worth. Most of our issues in our lives can be traced. I feel I've discovered to a lack of one of these or all of these or any combination of self love, self trust and self worth. So today we're going to focus on self trust. Why you need it, what it really means. How do you know if you have enough? How do you get more? What's, what's happened that has broken or damaged your self trust? Self trust has to be cultivated, right? It really does. It needs to be attended to, it needs to be developed. It's one of those things that in life, no one stops us in 10th grade and says, okay, now we're doing a semester on self trust. You're going to learn how to believe that you may really know something that is right and correct. You're going to learn how to assess something, get over your fear and self doubt. You're going to learn how to make decisions quicker and faster. You're going to learn how to feel if something really is right for you or not right for for you. Now imagine if you had that skill your whole life, that you always picked the right man to marry, that you always chose the right job to get into, that you always picked the right house to move into in the right neighborhood. Can you imagine what your life would look and feel like if that had been something that had been introduced to you when you were much younger? Right. Well, it's not too late. This is why you're on a journey of personal growth. Because we keep waking up at different points in our life to this understanding that, ah, here is the next thing that I missed out on and frankly, almost everybody missed out on here. You're here in a big, big, big, big crowd. So you're saying to yourself, all right, I'm curious about self trust. What does it mean? How do I cultivate it? Well, for instance, if you want to go bigger in your life, like I mentioned earlier, go bigger or get into some good deep healing. Trust is the foundation of these processes. Trusting yourself means that you can take leaps, you can make choices, you can stretch into unfamiliar territory. Let's say that you want to start your own business, right? How many people want to start their own coaching program? This has become quite a popular trend. How many people want to start selling and showing their art? How many people want to change their careers and get into real estate or fashion design, right? Hands are going up all over. What does it take to get there? Doesn't just take knowledge, right? The knowledge is always sitting out there. There's a school you can go to, there's a place you can start working at, there's programs that you get, books, knowledge is everywhere. More fundamental, though, more foundational is the trust that you can do this, the trust in yourself. If I choose this, it'll work out for me. If I choose to do this, I'll be able to do it. I'll be successful at it. If I choose to do this, I know I'm choosing something that will make me feel good. I know that I can feel it. It screams a yes all over, right? That is self trust. Now, self trust is intimately bound with this idea of growing bigger because. And by growing bigger, I simply mean moving to the next level of your life, expanding out of where you currently are. To do this, you have to have what do they call, faith in yourself, trust in the universe, trust in your decisions. Pretty much anything that you try to grow or make or create will only grow as big as what you currently are inside you. In other words, if you're trying to grow a business, it's not going to get any bigger than you yourself are inside. If you're trying to grow and deepen a relationship, it's not going to grow any deeper than the depth you are able to be with yourself inside you. See, in flow dreaming, we sort of turn the tables on a lot of things. Instead of trying to make everything work outside us out there, we always look inward first and say, whatever I am inside is what is reflected to me by my outside world or in my outside world, right? So if you're looking at your money and saying it's not enough, well, you could go out there and endlessly try and support the growth of your money and find that it always keeps falling back to a certain level over and over again. Bang, bang, bang. You build it up and bang, bang, bang, it falls right back down. Why? What is that level it constantly falls back to? Well, that level is your own inner level, right? It's your baseline. It's your baseline. So how do you grow that a little higher? How do you grow that bigger? Well, that's where you go inside. And one of the ways you grow it is by cultivating your own inner trust. You know, a good example of this is my son. He likes to build with his, his blocks. And they're big boy blocks. They're not little kid blocks. They're these little thin pieces of rectangular wood that you can create these marvelous little architectural, you know, creations out of skyscrapers, out of. He builds them to be 4 or 5ft tall and these little thin pieces of wood, and at a certain height, they always collapse. They always do they get real wobbly and he tries to shore them up and shore them up and shore them up. And it reminds me, this is what we often try and do in our life, right? We build something. It gets to a certain height and then comes down again. Why? Well, the obvious answer is the foundation. The foundation isn't stable enough to support that height, to support that expansion. So when you have a relationship that repeats itself over and over, when you have a workplace and you, you, you quit or get fired and then you get another job and it's the same as the last job, and round and round you go, Groundhog Day. How come it doesn't ever evolve? It's the foundation. It always is. And too often we try and grow things over and over again that we just haven't built that inner support for yet. So when you build that support, it's a process of going inward, going inside, and recognizing how do I feel about myself? Do I have faith in myself? Do I have faith in my ability to make decisions? Do I have faith that I can make something succeed where it failed last time? Do I have trust that I will choose a different kind of partner, one who loves me and gives to me and just fulfills every desire? Do I trust that could actually happen to me? Right? This is what you need to go into. And the same is true with healing, right? This is the same conversation we have. In fact, let's talk about the next section here I wanted to get into, which is, how do we get robbed of self trust? What happens to it over the years? You know, now that we've kind of explored what it does for you and how your life is reflective of your level of it, how did we get robbed of it in the first place? This is a conversation I've had with a lot of potential MI school students lately. It's always such a fertile time when I'm talking with so many people like this because it's like patterns and blocks galore, just bam, bam, bam. One person after another, you know, they become so blatant, so in your face. So I speak with a lot of people and they say, well, you know, for instance, this week I spoke with a couple who said, well, you know, I've been in a coaching program and it was a huge disappointment to me and I didn't get what I needed and I felt like it didn't serve me. And I, you know, I came away feeling very like, I don't want to do this again and this is not going to work. And I don't know if B school is going to be any different. I love you, Summer. I love your work. I love flow dreaming. I've done it for years. And in my head I'm, I'm thinking, you love it, it works. You've done it for years. You have a great deal of faith in it, but you don't have faith in what then. And they say, well, you know, I just had this bad experience. It's like, oh, you didn't have, you know, so you lost faith in yourself. You lost your self trust. You can't make a decision. You're feeling paralyzed because the last decision you made was bad. And then I presented, I said, okay, so what do you want to do with that? Do you sit in this? Do you say, okay, I will never join another program. I will never have a coach, I will never have a mentor. I will never see an intuitive. I will never, you know, how. What's this going to extend into? I'll never spend over X amount of dollars. Right? It almost gets kind of silly. Like really, you're gonna let your entire future be shut off and shut down. You're gonna give that much power to that past experience that you're gonna shut off all your potential avenues for healing that experience. Because that experience isn't going to be healed until you go back in and say, you can't break my trust in myself. You can't break my trust in myself. So I'm going to step back and say, hey, maybe I made that decision and I don't understand it and I was disappointed. Does that mean I still can't trust myself to make another similar decision? Does that mean that I'm walking away with this worse self perception? Did I just in fact maybe uphold a pre existing idea about myself, which is I don't trust myself, I always do dumb things, or I never make it through programs, I never get the raise I want. I always choose the same kind of man. Let's put this in the context of marriage. You get a divorce, do you say, no, I'm never gonna date again. I'm never gonna. No, I'm never gonna do that. It was terrible. It was awful. I can't trust myself. I'm. Nope. Uh, right. There's a tendency, but it's also a way of saying yeah, that, that, that divorce won, that sucky relationship won because it's marked me now for life. I refuse to trust myself again. My point is, at some point you have to re approach, you have to say, no, it doesn't win. I will learn to trust myself. No no matter what. No matter what. Because I can't function in my life if I don't. I can't go bigger. I can't even heal this. This thing now that I'm holding inside of me, this dread, this fear, this lack of faith that I can do it. It's time to heal that. Move past it. Don't let it mark you forever. If you get self trust back, you begin building your tower. As long as you're letting things that have broken it in the past keep you out of the game. You know, you're like a baseball pitcher or batter or whatever. You know, they got hurt, they're out on an injury and now they're healed, but they're just still sitting in the batting cage. Why? Well, it might happen again. If I go out there, I don't trust myself. What if I slip up again? What if I get hurt again? Then you're not going to play the game and it's entirely up to you. How long do you want to keep yourself out of the game? How long? What else are you waiting for? Are you waiting just to forget to let time go by? That's one way. It's the way most people use. Unfortunately, depending on how stubborn you are, that might be years, that might be five years before you approach relationships again. That might be three years before you say, well, I'm going to go into my self growth again and start trusting and believing people. Or it might be, you know, this applies to your careers too, your jobs as well. I did a show called Career PTSD a while back. It's virtually about the same thing. Having your trust broken and coming back from it. Trust is fundamental to every choice you make in your life. If you don't have it, you will find yourself sitting out the game for lengthy periods of your life. And then you're going to say, I stalled out. I don't even know what I want anymore. I feel like I have no passion and I'm depressed. And I'll say, if you unravel that, I bet you will find at one point your trust was broken. And sometimes it was broken because somebody else did something that betrayed you. Sometimes it's that you felt you made a bad call, you made a bad decision, and now you don't trust any. When are you going to heal that? And usually that means jumping right back into the thing that you lost your trust with in the first place, which is very brave, it's very strong, and it's a very powerful place to be in inside yourself. Because when you're in that kind of power you're recognizing. No one else is going to give it to me. It's all coming from me. I can't borrow this power from someone else. No one else can talk me into doing it. I must be powerful. I'm the only one who can make this choice. I've been given that power to make that choice. All right, we're going to go to a quick break and when we come back, we'll do some more Flow Dreaming. And I'm going to give you an option, an idea, a path. How do you develop self trust? Where do you go from here? Stay with me for more Flow Dreaming right after this. Hey, it's summer again and yes, we're on break, but I wanted to share some important stuff with you about the hugely amazing and gorgeous ME School of Flow. Right now, it's either enrolling or it's accepting names onto the wait list. This means that I'm accepting students that I work with personally over the year ahead. And I teach you to do what I do. How to think, how I think, how to work with flow. Manifest, create and use the universe the way it's meant to be used. You're going to create amazing things using flow. You'll also open and expand your empathic intuition. After doing this for a number of years, I can tell you MI schoolers make strides and hit goals way beyond what they think they're going to be able to do going in over and over. You don't have to be a superstar going in because that's what we're going to turn you into once you get there. If you're ready to go big, if you know you need to deepen your spiritual practice and your personal growth, then this is where you need to be. Your life, after all, only grows as big as you do. So MI School is online. That means you'll connect with me from all over the world. What to do next? Click or swipe on over to flowdreaming.com. you'll see an area that talks about MI School. During enrollment, you can set up a free 20 minute call with me me. And during weightless times, I invite you to send me a note telling me about your interest. Okay, I look forward to hearing from you and even more to getting to know you as one of my personal students in MI School. Now let's get back to the episode. And welcome back to Flow Dreaming. So now you know what it does for you. Now you know how perhaps you lost it. Some sort of past disappointment, some sort of feeling of frustration with yourself. That, that response of, well, I'm just gonna sit out the game if I can't get it right, right? That sort of time out, all timeouts have to end. It's totally up to you when you want to end it. Right? The moment you choose to end it, though, is the moment you go into your healing. When you're simply in a timeout, you're just removing yourself from the process. When you go back in is when you begin to heal it. And how is that possible? Well, healing is a process of oftentimes simply replacing what happened before with a new and better experience. Right. As long as you're holding that bad experience inside you, that emotion of the bad experience, then the new experience, you know, has to basically come in and overwrite the other experience or balance it out. And until that happens, you're only able to refer back to that old bad experience, that old bad thought or belief about yourself. So going back in means committing to overriding the bad experience by trying it again. Right? Now, you don't just build the same thing the same way you did it before. That would be silly, right? That's building another block tower, the same as the last block tower with the same weak foundation, because, gosh darn it, my son keeps building them on the rug. Like, try it in the hallway where it's wood. I bet you it'll be a lot stronger and you'll get taller. You need to do the same thing. You need to say, all right, I'm going to start working inside me first. I'm going to look at my self trust, and I'm going to ask myself, does this decision make me trust myself or not trust myself? How do I feel as I go into it? Now I use decision making as often a way to calibrate. How are we with our self trust? Right? People who tend to not make decisions quickly are people who tend to hang back, wait, overthink, wait for more proof, need more, need more, need more. Not ready yet, can't tell yet, don't know yet. Right. You hear this? I know. I do it too. I used to do it a lot more. Thankfully, I've been able to weed out this, this weed of a energy pattern in my life. Because what it really is always saying is, I can't trust myself and I can't trust flow. Now that's important. Having this trust that flow will have your back, that your life will have your back. And sometimes that's what's become broken. You're like, no. Flow doesn't even have my back. God doesn't care, Life doesn't care. Just gonna hand me crappy things. If that's the case, then we need to heal that too. See, when I am deciding to listen to myself and I'm feeling, what does my gut say? What does my gut say? I get that feeling. And then the next step for me is, what happens if I. If I act on this? Well, I. I might make a good decision. Or actually, it could be still wrong. Maybe I am being misled. Maybe I am, you know, getting into wishful thinking. Maybe I am not up to the task. Maybe, you know, any of those things that come up, those fears, any of them could be true. But you see, I have this greater sense of trust, which is. And when I discover which one of those is true, flow will come in and help me through it, right? It's going to take me to the next experience I need that is most likely to help me get through it, right? It's going to give me the resources. It's going to nudge me back in alignment. It's not like you just decide something and then completely never talk to the universe again, right? That's not flow dreaming. That is not alignment. That's not being in flow. Being in flow is, yeah, I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna check in every day. How am I feeling about this? Am I feeling scared today? Am I feeling upset? Am I working? Am I really healing this? Is it starting to upset and frustrate me? Flo, help me out with that. What is this telling me, right? I'm engaging in this. I'm encountering this again. What is this telling me? What does it mean? I need to work out? How do I need to adjust? Help me, give me the right opportunities, give me the right people. What do I need? See, so then you can go forward with the sense of being constantly tracked, like being nudged back on track every time you start to stray and do something that's not right. Nudging back on track, but you're also there, very attentive, very attentive. It's usually that we stop being attentive. You know, the boyfriend does something crappy and we don't think about it, or we think, oh, that's a bummer. And then it does it again. He does it again. He does it again. Because we stop listening to flow. Flo keeps telling us, that didn't feel good. This is your opportunity to heal and not do that, not be with that, end this. But because we stop paying attention, we forget what we're doing, we slip back. So developing your self trust means staying consciously aware. I'm actually in a process of developing my trust, right? And I'm going to start getting consistent, very consistent. Meaning I'm always turning my attention back to flow. I'm going into my flow, dreaming. I am asking, I am saying, I am healing from this. I am getting through this difficult issue that has prevented me from going bigger. I can trust myself. People who trust themselves are people who continue moving forward. People who don't trust themselves are people who stop, stand still because that's the safest position. But in the long run, it's not safe at all. Because someday you open your eyes and you realize everybody else is three miles ahead of me. They kept walking and I stopped. Now I feel behind. Now I've got to catch up. It's an illusion of safety. So moral of the story today, plunge back in, right? Plunge back in. Make it a conscious choice. I need to trust myself. I need to trust my feelings. I need to trust my yeses, trust my nos. And frankly, you know, it's one of the best ways to counter all the lack thinking in your life. For those of you when I speak about lack thinking, what is lack of self trust? It's one of the most fundamental lacks there is. And all the decisions that spew out of that lack self trust, Lack the ability to say yes filled with fear. So in me school, by the way, I take my students through a process, several processes, helping them really get clear on what a yes is for them, what a no is, what to do when they're still in the maybe zone. There are ways to work through this. There are techniques you can practice daily. There are flow dreams you can practice daily. If this is something that you really feel like, yeah, I need to engage that this year. There are things you can do. Okay, speaking of doing things, I'm gonna switch right over and I would love to talk with some of you. So what happens in this portion is that I bring you on the line and you'll ask me the question about my life. What's going on? You know, what's, what's bothering you? What do you need guidance on? Is there a flow dream that we could. How could we emotionally connect to this and change things? So I do a combination. I may empathically, intuitively look and see what's happening. I may simply go in and say, we need some energy adjustments in your flow. Come do it with me. Or I may give you a little sample flow dream. I'll say, practice this this is your medicine, your tonic, you know, your antidote to the situation. Use this, and I bet you it'll help clear it up. All right, so let's start with Cindy in Kansas. Hey, Cindy, how are you?

I'm good. How are you, Summer?

I'm wonderful. What's going on in your life?

Well, I sent you an email. I don't know if it'll jog your memory or not, but talking about self trust, this is perfect for me today because this is probably one of the first times in my life I'm actually really trusting myself to make a good decision. Even though it's going to seem a little crazy, I've connected back in with this man who I used to be in love with when I was really Young, in my 20s, we were in love. Life got crazy messy, and we didn't end up together. And we've reconnected.

Okay.

And like, no time has passed at all. And we've been talking, well, for a while now. It's just so clear to us that we need to make a life together.

We're very far apart.

So I've been flow dreaming for this, trying to create this opportunity or, you know, I've been doing a lot of flow dreaming with this or better. This is gonna be a huge change. I mean, a geographical change.

So what's the problem that's. That's hidden in this? What's the fear?

Well, one huge problem is that I'm married, but my. My marriage is dissolving and I'm trying to work on releasing energy.

Okay.

We are very incompatible energies. And.

Okay, so you want to solve the marriage issue first, right? You want to solve that. You're the marriage, the marriage problem first, right?

Yes, absolutely.

Yes. Okay. And you want to make sure that this is ended in a place where as much as possible, you're both coming out feeling strong and like, this was a good and right decision for you both.

Right.

Okay. That's going to help you stay in a strong and very focused state of mind. Meaning I'm doing the right thing, even though, you know, I may have met somebody and so forth. You know, that may be the catalyst for this. I'm still going to act in integrity in my marriage because that's how I feel about myself. I am in integrity inside myself. Keeping your energy very clean and very high, very pure. So this means dissolving it, right? Separating, making the change as this occurs. The next step is how do I trust myself to know that this other relationship that I'm contemplating is really my next Step versus simply the thing that was able to help me move out of a situation I'd outgrown.

Well, I completely trust this relationship and I'd like you to look in my flow with him if he can.

Okay.

Because we have a very long history together and it feels. I mean, I don't, I don't question this at all.

What do you want to know?

I want to know if you can sense a timeline around lots of things. Well, not lots of things, but yeah.

Can you give me his first name? Edward. Okay. And is he single or married? He's married too.

He's much more closer to divorce than I am.

Okay, so you both are. So you both are moving through separation process. Right. Whether it was you, each other who triggered it or not, something was already there in the marriage that had to be addressed. And so you're going to go ahead and take care of both of you and clean that up. Okay. So you both are needing to do this. You know, honestly, the timeline that I'm looking at now is lengthier than I think that you're looking at or hoping for. You know, I'm feeling there's like a two year horizon here. Now. Don't. This is the difficulty with predictions. The moment we say a prediction, we begin to make it true because you begin to set your sights on it and make your choices based on it. And every time you do that, you're giving it more energy of truth. Just as things are now, though, with the complications, you know, the coming of, you know, closing things and separating assets and so forth. You know, this, this thing is two years out. But this also gives you information. If you guys want to get more clear on this and come up with sort of an agreement, I'm going to make this as quick as I can or I need to do this at my emotional pace. You may find that you're on different, you have different ways of doing this. He might say, no, I need to do this at my correct emotional pace. And you might be saying, I need to make this as expedient as I can.

Right, Right.

That's the part that I feel is the most, needs the most clarity between the two of you so that you're on the same page so there's not two sets of expectations happening. Even though he may be closer to ending things, he's still more stuck in. I'll do this when I emotionally am ready to do this. Right. Okay. Speed is not his number one goal. I'm sure you're probably aware of that already. Yes.

Yeah, I know Him? Well, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. So just keep that in mind. You know, the big takeaway, I think, for you is to recognize that, you know, if I'm committing to recreating my life. Right. And I'm leaving my marriage not just because there's somebody else who woke me up to the idea that, oh, my gosh, I can feel differently and I didn't realize how badly I was feeling.

Yeah, right.

But I'm leaving my marriage because I need to do it for me no matter what happens. And he's doing the same thing. He's doing it for himself. And then the two of us are going to reconnect or reunite when we're both at that place where it's absolutely right to do so and our communication is open and clear the whole way through. Can you feel? Yeah, go ahead.

Do we feel good to you?

You do feel good, but you feel like I feel. I know. I'm really harping on this one kind of theme, which is the clarity and the recognition that you're both going to do this on sort of with different end goals. You know, yours might be. I just need to get through this. And his is, this has got to be emotionally on the timeline. I want it to be. I need it to be more delicate or I need this or I need that. Right. I just, I feel like the clarity thing for you gu, is the main thing that you need. Without that, then it becomes too easy for you to kind of start throwing stuff back and forth at each other down the road. Like, well, you're not doing it when I want you to do it and then does, you know, and that's the thing I want you to stay out of.

Okay.

Okay. So I think that's what you're alluding to. Does it feel good? It's like, yeah, he's still on track, but he's got his own method. Okay.

Yeah. Yep.

All right, my dear. Thank you. I hope that helps. So when you flow dream, you need to stay in that really strong and pure place. I'm doing this for me. I'm doing this so I can love and be loved in a bountiful way. I'm doing this for my soon to be ex husband so he can be loved and love in a bountiful way. That's number one. And number two is. And if this other thing is going to come through for both of us, I'm staying wide open to receive whatever that next step is for me.

Yeah.

Okay, darling. Thank you. Bye. Take care. Bye. Yeah, that's, you know, that's she's in a very common situation, but it doesn't make it any easier just because it's common. And I think, you know, in her case, keeping her head straight on her priority is what is going to help her move through with the greatest amount of ease and the least amount of anguish all the way through. Okay. Hey, let's do. Let's do. Kelly, I think you've been waiting a while. Hey, Kelly. Wyoming.

I have, yeah.

How are you?

Great.

Good. What can I help you with today?

Well, Summer, I'm 39 and all that you're saying I'm really clicking with. I am in a new relationship, so I've gone through divorce and having kids and all that. And my question more is I just wanted you to look into my flow with my age. I'm in such a great place with a wonderful man. But the issue of pregnancy has come up and I've been back and forth whether or not I should do it or shouldn't. And it, and it is part of like getting close to myself is like, what do I want? And one minute it feels like I do, I feel like I don't. And like it's that trust issue. Like you keep talking about that I don't know where I'm at.

Yeah. Yeah. And so I take it that in, in your new relationship, he wants children.

Yeah, he does.

Okay. Okay. So he wants children and you recognize I can still squeak one or two out at 39. I feel you. Okay. So I'm just gonna look at you and you have you said you had kids already? How old are they?

10 and 12.

10 and 12. Okay. So it's a big gap and you remember and are you willing to take it all up again? You know what? This time through, I feel like you're going to feel a lot easier if you choose to go ahead and have a baby. It's an easier experience for you. It's not as stressful as it was the first time. And that's something I think you've been worrying about. Like, do I, can I really get through all of that again? You're going to feel like an old timer. I don't mean that in a literal way, but, you know, like an old hand at this. So immediately I'm feeling more comfort around you just in terms of the whole experience of raising a child at this point. I think you're going to find in your partner that he's eager. I feel a lot of eagerness around him, excitement. And that's going to be a good feeling. Your other two children are looking on with wariness, right? They do not know how they feel about this. They are concerned they're going to be displaced. Right. So you really want to bring them in because they will not understand at first. Okay? You have to keep letting them know you love them to pieces. Now let's look at you, because somehow everybody else has popped up at you. You doing this. Some concerns about your age popping in there. Will it be easy? Is it going to be good? Will the baby be healthy? I'd like you to flow through that and develop trust. No matter what baby I get, it's a wonderful baby. A boy, a girl. It doesn't matter to me. This child, if this child is meant to be with me, offering it an opportunity. And it's as much this child's decision as it is my own, who this baby wants to be, when they want to be born, if they want to come to me at all. So maybe I will open myself to the opportunity and allow this child to make the decision as well. All right? If you shift it and you look at it like that, you start to realize it's not just you. It's kind of 50, 50 here.

Yeah, I get that. I feel like. Yeah, like, it is kind of my decision. I had an appointment today to go that originally made it to have an IUD removed, and then I changed my mind once again. But I had something in there that actually the doctor told me to go home and take a pregnancy test, which it was negative, but I don't know if it's an issue. It's just kind of funny how it kind of came up, like, where it could be possibly this. And then, of course, it wasn't once I got home. But then now I'm like, okay, what's going on?

Yeah. Mm. You know, when stuff like that comes up, you have so much little, you know, conflict in your energy right now. It wouldn't surprise me that you've got, you know, conflict down there. You know, the same sort of indecision. Am I pregnant or not? Could I be pregnant with an iud? Oh, my gosh. You know, that's like. That's the same sort of back and forth indecision that you're feeling right now about having a baby. You're unit. Your. Your uterus is just sort of manifesting it for you, right? The same indecision. So please take some time just to go inside yourself. You've done this before, but do it again. Have a conversation with this child that you just daydream up the child in your mind. Right. You don't have to even pretend you're doing anything mystical. Just have a daydream conversation. What would you be like in my life? Would we be happy together? Would our family be happy? Am I up to taking care of you? Right. Play through that. So take it out of the realm of just your decision and make it the both of your decision. Okay? Okay.

Now, would it be silly? I don't want to take too much more of your time, but would it be silly to think that a relative would come back into my life? Because that's what I keep thinking would happen.

Oh, you mean in through the baby? Yeah.

I lost the Damien. Or else. I really think my grandma, Nana. Mm.

I don't know that your grandma would come back as that, but I do feel she would be a presence for you. She's very close around you. I mean, she's got. When I'm looking at other, you know, energies surrounding you, sometimes people feel far away and sometimes they feel very close. She's close and she's curious. She's a hands on grandma. So. So I think she would be there as support through the whole thing, through the whole child's life.

Okay, well, I will do what you say.

All right, Cindy, you take care. Excuse me, Kelly. I get all bubbled up in there. I'm looking. Okay, Kelly, take care. All right, we have a quick break to go to and we'll be back right after this. We'll do a flow dream to help you figure out, hey, what's the state of my self trust and how can I make it stronger and clearer and just feel better. So stay with me. Here. We are on a quick break and I have a few suggestions for you. First of all, if you're wondering how to flow dreams or what flow dreaming really is, I have a free gift bag of downloads for you on my website right now. Go to flow dreaming.com. enter your email. That's it. You'll get the downloads right then instantly. And they're a 30 minute tutorial on how to flow dream. And I give you a free flow dream to start with. This saves me from reteaching the basics over and over again on the show, and it gives you the first step toward a freaking awesome life. You're gonna find these downloads on my homepage right now. So pop in your email, send them right over to you. Next, my manifesting shop@flowdreaming.com is what underwrites this entire show. It brings it to you free every week and it has for the last 10 years, which is saying quite a lot. And what's there? Amazing playlist on all kinds of topics, MP3s, flow, dreams that end, fear that gets you unstuck, that can get you to your perfect career, that can get you out of debt, help you find your soulmate. So much more. These playlists are incredibly powerful, highly effective. My inbox is full every day with thank you notes from lottery winners, people who've just gotten married, people who've received eye popping bonuses, who've reduced massive amounts of pain or healed themselves in so many different ways. So please go visit the manifesting store@flow dreaming.com and see what you want to pick up and start using to change your life with. Okay, back to the program. Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. Alrighty guys, ready to go into our flow together? Ah, we relax, right? Relax your body. This is not meditation, but you can't unleash your emotional self if your body is tense and tight or disturbing. So this is why I like to breathe. Big, deep breaths, relaxing all the way through. Shoulders drop, let your neck roll around, let your jaw drop open and your brow relaxes as well. You're gonna let yourself go. Let yourself feel like you're a little leaf, a leaf floating on the top of some water. And the water has a current. And you, as this leaf, you just sort of spin and float, moving, gliding gently down the stream, just like the old nursery rhyme. And you don't know where the stream is going to. You don't know where the current is taking you. But it's okay. Where you're going is just right. It's where you're meant to go. It's where you yourself had a hand in setting up the direction based on all your desires for what you want to be and learn and develop and experience in this little piece of you, the source self. A bit of source, a bit of God's own energy cast forward here as a soul, as a being, as a consciousness, coming here to collect all kinds of experience and information, acknowledging yourself, testing yourself, pushing the limits of what you are and what you're becoming. And you notice, do I trust myself? What does it feel like if I simply say, yes, I trust myself? I'm just going to release into that feeling right now. Yes, I trust myself. I bring up some of these things that have been looming in my life. Decisions to be made, ideas to pursue or not pursue, relationships to develop or let go of all of this. And I realize if I start trusting myself and I start allowing, allowing myself to make the decisions If I start allowing myself to move things a little further along, if I start saying, I'm not waiting anymore for any more information, if I start saying, I do trust this and I'm going to make my decisions based on this. Notice how you feel. Did you just get a little bump? Did something in you just lift up and speed yourself along a little quicker? Did that you. That little leaf self of you flying, gliding on the surface of flow? Did you just pick up the pace? Do you feel like you unhooked yourself from something that was holding you back and yet you still notice? There are times there'll be points when I reach stillness in the flow. Stillness that allows me to look around, to make decisions, to gather information. And those moments are useful to me. Those are the moments where I'm choosing to implement my trust because of the information that's already come to me. But then here comes that choice again, that decision again, that big, beautiful source of trust that just swells up inside of me. And I say, yeah, I'm good. Let's do this. Let's act on this. Let's believe this. Let's try this again. Yes, I want to heal this. No, I'm not going to let this hold me down and hold me back. Yes, I'm going to go right back into this. That's trust. Oh, and it's strong. And feel what your flow is responding. It's saying, oh, yeah, we love it when you do this. We love it when you act like this. Why? Why? Because this is what your flow is made for. Your guidance can only guide when you're receiving it, when you're acting on it, and when you do it. So delighted. And it's delighted in you right now. And you're delighted in it. And you're saying, I will. I will make a deal with you. If I say yes to this, will will you help me back? If I go out of alignment, if I find myself a place I don't want to be in, if I start to feel the old feelings, will you give me the next step? Can I trust you, Flo? And your life responds. Your higher self responds. God responds, responds. Source responds. Universe response says, yes, we're in this together. We always have been, we always will be. So go into your trust, start believing it and start owning it. And now that you've committed to that, you find yourself returning from flow. Your daydream ending and your eyes opening. And there you have it, an example of a flow dream. Notice not meditation. I was asking you to feel things. To feel things. Feel your way along these different choices, to feel this beautiful breath, bouncy, buoyant, alignment, really connecting, asking yourself to make choices and commitments, to unleash your emotional self. Now, the images, they're just garnish, right? They're the parsley on the plate. I hope you felt the emotion that is flow. And with that, we get to wrap up today's episode. Thank you so much for joining me. I love being with you. And I will be back again next week. Whole new topic for another episode of Flow Dreaming. Well, look at that. Show's over. But before you go, did you know that my mom has a podcast, too? Her show airs live right after mine. It comes up next. We tape our live shows back to back. Her show is called the Dear Venus show. So stay listening and you can call in or look it up live on itunes if you're listening via podcast. Her show is really good. It's really funny. And she reads people's minds and futures and talks to dead people for real. It's called the Dear Venus show on itunes.