#499 How to Be Gentle with Yourself

Flow Dreaming. It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does. It gives you a feeling of power again in your lives. Oh my God. You were so on target.

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I don't know why I feel like crying. I think I just feel your love. Of course. And I think I'm gonna get some ANSWERS. I'm Summer McStravik and welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Welcome to Flow Dreaming. We get started a really quick note. If you found this show on itunes or by downloading the Flow Dreaming podcast app, it would mean so much if you took a moment to review it. That is how other people will find this show and get the same great value out of it that I hope you're getting. So my huge thanks and sparkles and flow go to all of you who just take that few moments to go write a quick little message of telling other people. This is good. Go listen. Thank. Now off we go to the show. Welcome to Flow Dreaming. Hi everybody, this is Summer McStravik. Delighted to be with you. We have a very special show today, as it turns out. Who knew, right? Surprise. I have decided to play with the format of my podcast yet again. I have done this multiple times over the years. I've gone years where I've had interviews with people and then years with no interviews. And I've decided to take the summer to produce a series of more topic driven, kind of tighter subjects. This means that this will be the last podcast with live callers for a little while, possibly forever. I don't know. We're gonna see where this takes us and we're going to delve more into a true podcasty type format, which is I come up with good content and I give it to you things I'm thinking about ways of using flow, etc. Of course, every show is still going to have a punchy little flow dream at the end and we're going to play with this for a while and see what we think. It's just time to innovate. It's time to freshen things up. I'm ready for, I don't know, a new take. We all have to do this every so often. And I've done this multiple times with this longest running Mind, Body Spirit podcast probably in the entire universe going on what, 11 years now, consecutive, without stopping, even through chemo, this podcast has continued. So I want you all to join me. You will still find it in all the usual places. If you're getting it from itunes, look to itunes. If you're getting it from my app, look to my app. We may or may not continue to broadcast live through ctr. Still deciding on that. But all of the regular downloadable places just keep going there and they they everything should remain smooth and continuous. In fact, if I hadn't told you, you probably would never have noticed. But that's how I am tell you everything, especially everything that's sitting there right on the top of my mind like this today. And a little bit of sadness that's that's coming in. So we have a one time phone number to use just for today if you happen to be listening live. That number is 888-455-0108. Again, 888-455-0108. I'll give it out again in a little bit because when we get to our calls. But let's talk about the topic. Hey, how to be gentle with yourself. And the reason that this is up on my topic list things that I feel we need to discuss within the realm of flow and flow dreaming is that I've been hearing myself use this phrase so much lately. I do work with people privately, some of my private high end clients and this phrase just keeps popping out over and over and over. And a lot of these people are pretty high achievers, right? They are building and doing amazing and great things. They are active in their community, they're active in their, you know, their workplaces, they're trailblazing their own companies, doing a lot of things and they always come to me to kind of help them recenter get back on track, get back into alignment. How do I manifest this? How do I make this without killing myself in the process? And I say incorporate flow, right? Incorporate flow. Be in a state of flow in everything you do, everything you show up for in your personal life, your romantic relationships, in your family life, with your work life. Be in a state of flow, right? Which always brings up this question, how do I be in a state of flow yet get everything done that I need to do by the deadlines I need to do them by, right? And they state it like that. These are in conflict. Right? And that's the very first thing we have to deconstruct. These things are not in conflict. Being in flow doesn't mean waking up saying, oh, I'm not going to work today. I'm just going to eat cookies and ice cream, and I'm going to hang out in bed, and then I'm going to walk the dog, and then I'm going to watch some daytime tv, and then I'm gonna just go back to bed, and then I'm gonna. Right, That's. That's not flow. That's just taking a day off. Right? Let's just take it a day off. Most of us don't live like that. Most of us have these long to do lists. We have things that are expected of us. Our own inner driver. Right? Our own inner taskmaster. And this. This is totally unrelated to what you've actually achieved or not. Right. You can have the most, you know, difficult, critical inner taskmaster and still not be achieving much in life. Your taskmaster is just telling you things like, oh, another day you didn't get it done. Oh, another deadline you missed. Oh, look at that. How come you went to the gym today instead of doing those things you had to do? Oh, look at you. Right? Your inner taskmaster is just criticizing all the things that you're not doing. And then you have people who do a whole lot. They do a hell of a lot. I mean, they just. They just chunk through so much in a day that would take most of us to a week to get through. And yet their taskmaster is saying the same thing. Why can't you do more? How come this hasn't worked out yet? Well, you just have to push yourself a little harder. If you can handle all this, you can handle some more. Right? The same talk is going on. Whether or not the outside world is showing, quote, unquote, achievement surrounding you. This is where we go back to being gentle with yourself. Being in flow. Right. Being in flow. Let's. Let's go back and just think about that. Feel what that means for just a second. What is being in flow? Being in flow is a recognition that there is a current of life, a direction that everything in the world, everything in the universe, adheres to. A grand, cosmic flow. It is the universe expanding in one direction. It is our Earth spinning in one easy, fluid orbit. It is the fact that life springs from the seed and grows into the tree and then puts out baby seeds that then fall into the ground and a new tree comes up. Right? It's the circle, the circle of life, the cycle of life. But notice this is fluid. It's not struggling or forcing itself the whole way. This is, this is so deeply embedded. It just happens. There's no friction at this basic inner core of being. The basic inner core of being is, I'm expanding, I'm growing, I'm evolving to the next level, right? If we suspect that our cells are evolving to the next level and they are right, we look very different than our ancestors of several million years ago. If all of the trees and plants and animals in our world are likewise evolving to the next level, if perhaps the Earth is evolving to the next level, if perhaps the galaxy and the, and the universe itself is evolving to the next level, right? Look at the pattern here. Do you see the pattern? Things that work small usually tend to work medium and work large. It's a pattern. It's like fractals. They're in everything from the smallest to the largest. Look at chaos. It's in everything from the largest to the smallest. All these different theories, you are in this same progression, this same ease, this same natural flow, the same natural stacking up of experiences day after day after day after day. And sometimes we get scared because our little human minds say, well, you've only got this tiny little life experience. Make the most of it. This is it, right? Work your little tail off because someday you're going to die and you'll. That's it. And then another part of it says, well, I kind of think I might continue on. I kind of think I might have a consciousness or a soul that just continues. Why would I think that? Because I'm evolving, I'm expanding. And I've had enough experiences in my life to recognize that there is something else that I'm not fully aware of, but I am clued into. I've had enough experiences that tell me that I've, I've had a discussion with angels, or I've talked to my guide, or I've felt my own higher self, or I've had enough synchronicities and, and mind blowing coincidences occur, or I've had intuitive experiences like there's so many things you could name. I've spoken to God, I felt Jesus in my heart. I've, I've, you know, I felt transcendent through, through an act of love, right? All of these things are ways that we are cued in to this higher consciousness, to this awareness that there is a state of ease, there is a state of flow, we are connected with it, not just our physical Bodies, but our entire selves, physical and non physical. When I say be gentle with yourself, I want you to look at yourself through those eyes, through those eyes of God looking at itself. You piece of you. You being a piece of source energy. And how does that God feel? How does flow feel? Do you think flow or God is full of friction and difficulty and just, you know, inner criticism and. Or do you think it's filled with a loving benevolence that says do anything you want, play as hard as you want. Most things are going to work out for you and every now and then something isn't going to work out for you. And interestingly enough, usually those things that don't work out for you are things that were triggered or that you made from a state of fear or you made from a state of retracting or going small or you made from a state of deeply unhappy compromise. Right? Usually these are the things that don't work out for us. Things that don't work out for us are jobs that did work at one point but which we outgrew or we grew and the jobs didn't grow and so we move on. And this can be a frictionless process. This can be a gentle process. It means that you have cultivated the ability to be gorgeously adaptable, right? Adaptable. I flow through change. I expect change. Change is my friend. It's kind of like those of you who understand astrology. You know Saturn, Saturn the task master, right? I, Saturn and I, I've been working very hard over the years to cultivate a good relationship with, with, I call it Mr. Saturn, Mr. Saturn. I don't know why it always vibes as a man to me. Male energy, Yang, Yang energy. And I know I will have certain difficult things put in front of me. If I show all the way up and I get really real and I do well, I'll be rewarded and it will be okay. It will be good. In fact, I'll be in a better place, right? That's the kind of, that's the kind of way I give myself. I'm gentle though. I'm gentle through the process. I'm gentle in my awareness that as I change, as I make these adaptations, that I will go all in, I will expect them, I will request them often enough, right? Most of the stuff you're manifesting, right? Stick your hand up. What are you manifesting? Something that you want to be changed, right? You're actually saying I am manifesting. I am studying Law of attraction. I am studying, you know, Abraham Hicks, I'm Studying whatever, flow, dreaming. Because there are certain things I want to change. So I'm saying branch out. Get. Get happy with all change, not just the things you want to change. All change spread out. And how do you get into that state of joyful anticipation? How do you become adaptable? You have to be in a state of flow. You have to have that recognition that life is moving my way, it's moving in my direction. And yeah, we've all had times and points where we say, life isn't moving in my direction. Everything, you know, there's the, you know, is hitting the fan. Okay, true. We look at those times like we're turning corners. We're having curve balls. We're having things that piled up that perhaps we didn't address before that have all come to us now, and it's presented a bigger challenge than we would have wanted. Fine. Move through it. Accept it, release it. Grow through it. Be in a state of flow through it. Be gentle with yourself. So here's something else about this idea of being gentle. I often find that people who are involved in self help, self development, they're here because they want to improve themselves. Right? This is what we are. We are the hobbyists group for improving who we are. That's our hobby. Some people race dirt bikes. We like to improve ourselves. And we happen to find certain things exciting. Right. As we do, as we, you know, do this, this path of improvement. And maybe it's yoga that excited you, or maybe it's essential oils that excited you. Maybe it's Tai chi that excited you. Maybe it's flow dreaming that excited you. Right. Maybe it's coaching. Maybe there's all kinds of things that fall in this spectrum of things we do to grow our inner selves, to discover more who we are. Right? The same way that you grow your muscles at the gym, you can. Yes. Grow your personality. You can grow your character, you can grow your intellect, you can grow your stamina, you can grow your emotional capacity. You can grow your ability to talk and communicate with the universe. You can grow your spiritual connection, your spiritual connectivity. Right. That's exciting. All of these for me, it is deeply exciting. And so we get into this kind of race and rush, and one day we wake up and we say, I'm so tired. I feel like I've just not done enough. I'm just not doing enough. My business isn't growing as quickly as I want and I'm not learning and I don't have my clients and I. And I, you know, I need to get more this or I need to do more, that, and I should be here by now, and this should be healed by now. And. And there it is. Instead of being in this state of beautiful adaptation, beautiful confrontation, beautiful flow, we stop being gentle with ourselves through the process, and we get harsh and we're no longer good enough, and life is not giving us what we need. And we go down that road and it's frustrating and it's burdensome and it hurts and you get tired and you say, I just want to give it up. Just give it all up. What's happening is you've moved from a state of joyful expansion, joyful exploration, gentleness, to a feeling instead of, no matter how much I do, it's not good enough. Right? You could call it the dark side of self help. The part that if you're not careful, slips you onto this insane treadmill. And then you do more, you do more, you do more. Well, if I just do more, then maybe I'll. I will fix that or get past that. And then you realize, no, doing more is just going to burn me out faster. So being gentle with yourself again brings you back to center, brings you back to the place right in the middle where you say, you know what? I already am enough. I already have enough. And yet there's a part of me that wants to explore, see more, know more, grow more. And that's the part of me that I walk with every day as I add new things to my life, as I add new awarenesses to myself. Right? Do you see where we're heading here? You can be in a state of expansion, of growth, excitement, adapt. I can't say it. Adaptation. You can be inquisitive, you can be flowing, and you can also be growing, building, creating, making. You can be in a state of total, absolute expansion. And you can be gentle with yourself in a state of flow the entire time. And if something doesn't work out, your response is, oh, that didn't work out. Very interesting. I wonder why. Very curious. I wonder what I could do differently. I wonder why that's. You know, I call it having a hole in your pipe, right? Trying to carry water from one place to another. And sometimes there's a little hole and the water splashes out before you reach your destination, before you reach the goal. What is that? What's that hole? Where is it? Right? And that becomes exciting. I'm not upset now that I didn't reach my goal. I'm excited. I found something that I'm stumbling through that. That was weak inside of me. Or that was not working in my life, I found it. Hallelujah. That's wonderful. You see, that actually becomes part of the goal. Oh, I love that I fixed that. Something I didn't even know was broken popped up when I tried to do something and ta da, I got to fix it. You see this? I'm trying to model for you a language, a way of speaking to myself. Flow dreaming is, you know, to use a popular term, it's all mindset, right? What you feel is what you create around you. What you believe about yourself is what the world responds to. And you see this, and it helps explain why there's a lot of people out there. You don't know why they have all the wonderful seeming things they have, but they believe that about themselves. You see these, these, you know, I don't want to put down rich guys, but you know what I mean? Like a couple pop in my head, you know, These people, you just think they're so arrogant. They're just arrogant little bastards. They have all that money, you know, how did the universe gift it to them? Well, because inside they feel that they should have it. They're aligning to it. And you, you can't give them a hard time about that, right? They're just doing what we're all doing. And you see other people who are so worthy and they have. They have nothing, right? They maybe don't even have a significant other. And you just think, you're so amazing, you're so wonderful. Why don't you have all these things? Because inside they don't feel they can have those things. And the world shows up. It reflects that for them. It continuously proves it to them every single day. That's what flow does. That's what life does. That's what manifesting really is, at its core, a reflection of who you are in everything that shows up around you. If I have to say this every single episode, I will look at any area of your life that's not working and then look inside you. That's where it's not working. It's not the outside thing. The outside thing is just reflecting what's going on inside. Fix inside and the outside thing will clear up. Otherwise, you're just going to go about fixing the outside thing and it's going to pop up again and pop up again and pop up again. Why? Because it keeps reading your inner core. It keeps reading your inner makeup, your inner matrix, and it will keep popping up again. So what happens when instead you start to be gentle? Hmm? You're telling Flo be gentle with me. You're telling life, be gentle with me. I'm gentle with myself. Life, be gentle with me. Now, I'm not lazy at all. Don't confuse easy or gentle with lazy. Right. Like I said at the beginning of the show, right. Lazy is, this is my day off and I'm staying in bed with my book and my kitty cats. I'm taking a lazy day. Easy and gentle with myself means I'm showing up for something that's pretty difficult and hard and I don't know if I can pull it off. And I didn't really want to talk to that potential client, but I forced myself to or I didn't really want to have to go talk to my daughter's teacher, but I did and I didn't really want to write any. You could whole stack of things. I didn't really want to have to talk to my mother in law, but I did. And I'm easy and gentle with myself through the whole process. I'm committed, I'm strong, I'm not shying away, but I'm gentle with myself. And if I do poorly, I say, oh, you did pretty poorly. Guess we want to keep doing that one some more until we get that figured out because we don't want to have that, that poor spot in our life. I don't want to walk around always with that weak point, worrying it's going to hurt me again. No, let's take care of that. Okay, let's. Right. Can you, can you feel that, that way, that approach, right, that, that mental, emotional, energetic approach? How do you think my life responds to me when I give it that approach? It continues to throw plenty of challenging situations at me. My flow knows that I like some challenging situations sometimes, but it knows that I'm going to approach it with a sense of I still love myself, you're still good somewhere, you're all right, you did well. Or hey, you could do better. Let's see what we can do to make this better. Can you see how inside me this creates a being who is relaxed, comfortable, happy with herself, feeling excited most of the time, feeling inquisitive most the time, curious how I can fix or change or adapt to things being gentle with myself, and I'm practicing this more and more. How do I create this big, gorgeous, beautiful things in my life while being gentle with myself the entire way? And that's what I want flow to respond to in me. That's what I want the universe to hear me saying, Hear me feeling day in and day out. Why? You know, why do I. Why did I pick this? What's the big deal? Because ultimately it makes me feel good. Ultimately, it makes me feel good. It means that I'm not beating myself up for missing a deadline. It means that I'm not yelling at myself for something that should have gone differently. It means that I'm not replaying all those dozens of conversations in my head for hours or days after I've had them, worrying that I coulda, shoulda done better. I'm gentle with myself. I don't leak my energy like that. I don't waste my energy like that. I have more energy, therefore, to actually do stuff with. So be gentle with yourself. Before we go to break, I want to leave you with this little task. Where are you not being gentle enough with yourself? Where could you still keep your same set of goals but be much gentler with yourself as you achieve them? Where will that. Where? Where in your life? You've got one or two areas. I'm pretty sure of it. We all do. Look at it. Make a decision, change it. Make it be your goal. Today, I'm going to be gentle with myself surrounding this all day long. See what changes. You will be amazed at how all these little things just shift. All your little choices begin shifting your thoughts, begin shifting, your expectations begin shifting. All right, stay with me. We'll be right back after this quickie little break. And I see some calls, so we're gonna go get to those. And of course, we'll be doing some flow drumming. Be right back. Summer again. And yes, we're on break, but I wanted to share some important stuff with you about the hugely amazing and gorgeous MI School of Flo. Right now, it's either enrolling or it's accepting names onto the wait list. This means that I'm accepting students that I work with personally over the year ahead. And I teach you to do what I do, how to think, how I think, how to work with flow, manifest, create and use the universe the way it's meant to be used. You're going to create amazing things using flow. You'll also open and expand your empathic intuition. After doing this for a number of years, I can tell you MI schoolers make strides and hit goals way beyond what they think they're going to be able to do going in over and over. You don't have to be a superstar going in, because that's what we're going to turn you into once you get there, if you're ready to go big, if you know you need to Deepen your spiritual practice and your personal growth. Then this is where you need to be. Your life, after all, only grows as big as you do. So me school is online. That means you'll connect with me from all over the world. What to do next? Click or swipe on over to Flow dreaming dot com. You'll see an area that talks about MI School. During enrollment, you can set up a free 20 minute call with me. And during wait list times, I invite you to send me a note telling me about your interest. Okay, I look forward to hearing from you. And even more to getting to know you as one of my personal students in me school. Now let's get back to the episode. Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. You guys enjoying the show? I hope so. We have Kelly. Hi, Kelly. Welcome to the program. How are you? How are you? I'm well. What can I help you with?

My Christian summer is around money and really I wanted to see if you could take a look at it. My boyfriend and I, I should say fiance, we've been together long enough. We have collectively put our money together and there's just this really funky energy around it. I've been working at manifesting and clearing, and I think he's been working a little bit at some different avenues, like marketing, some network marketing, but it still just has a funkiness around it.

All right, so what's your boyfriend's first name and what does he do? Oh, you said he's working with some network marketing and stuff, right? He actually.

This is a trooper.

A cop. Okay.

And his name is Scott.

Scott. Scott. All right, and when did you merge your money? You're talking like it's a new thing.

Yeah, well, we've lived together for about a year, but we merged our money.

About.

Three months ago.

Mm. Okay. And you're still working out what that means, right? Do you each retain the same access that you used to? Can you still spend what you used to spend when it was just yours? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm seeing that you have some hesitancy. You're afraid. You're afraid to do something wrong, to rock the boat. You're feeling like now that you've put all of your income into one pot, you don't want him being upset with you. Right. And maybe that's part of the funkiness that you're feeling. It's an insecurity. It's a feeling of instability. You're learning or adapting to a new way of relating to your money. And that's the thing. It doesn't feel like your money in your mind, you're feeling like, well, it's now his money, and, you know, intellectually that it's both of yours, but it's his, too. And will he approve? And is this. Okay, I'm just looking over at Scott now to see. Because I'm trying to see if he's really this way or you're just, you know, this is some of your own baggage that you've brought in. All right. What is Scott thinking? So he likes things to be a bit. What's the word? Not regimented. He likes things very clear. He likes to know that we have. We pay this bill. This bill, this bill, this bill. You have this much left over here is how much you can spend for this. Right. It makes him feel very comfortable and. And like he's in control if he has this. Oh, really? Yeah.

I'm the one kind of taking care of everything.

Is he telling me this, then, about you? Hmm. This is interesting, because this is what I'm seeing. Like, all of these is, like ledgers, you know, made up in his mind. So he's the one looking at you doing this. This is weird, because it's not what I'm seeing. Or maybe he's feeling that way from you. Wouldn't that be interesting? Okay. And that would tell me, then again, though, what the feeling behind it is. There's a sense of security with that. Makes them feel secure, makes them feel good. So let me go back into you and see knowing that you're the one that's doing this, and you're the one that's tightened up and gotten afraid. That's what's happened. You've just tightened up and gotten afraid. Can you feel that?

Yes, absolutely.

Yeah. And now look at the big picture. That was not your intention when you merged your finances. The intention was to get more free. Right. To make it so that it's easier. Now you don't have to divvy up the grocery cash, and you don't have to divvy up the mortgage cash or whatever. Right. The intention was to be more free. And it's not tit for tat. And you don't get the only portion that's based on just your income. Right. It's a pot now. It's all. It's all shared. If he puts in X amount and you put in Y amount, you still can withdraw whatever you need. And that's the. That's the weirdness that you feel like, no, maybe I can't withdraw whatever I need.

Well, I had a freedom to do that. And I just feel like I haven't at this point.

Yeah, you started self censoring. And maybe it's because you're the one who's trying to make everything just and even and precise and lined up. It makes him feel secure. Right. That's the first thing he told me. Makes me feel good to have that. I like that. Obviously, it's one of the points he likes about you, but you can let go a little bit. Okay. Anything else?

I don't think so. Other than if you want to kind of hone in on that. Our avenues that we're taking, do you think we're in a good spot to make a little bit more and make it work for us?

Oh, you mean the other. The other avenues of income you're looking at? Yeah. I feel you dabbling. To be honest, I'm not feeling strong commitment. I'm feeling a kind of. Let me look like you're circling. Looking at it. Hmm. Maybe I should. Maybe we could try this. You're still in the maybe zone. You haven't really gotten into the deep, committed zone. And I think that's the difference. Just know that you're dabbling. When you make a commitment to really commit to one thing, then you should be looked at again. Right. But you haven't done that. Right now you're dabbling. Right. My dear, I hope that helps you. Thank you. Welcome. All right, Bye, Kelly. Take care. All right, looks like yes, more people waiting to speak, but we have to figure out who they are and get them up on my screen here. So we'll just give ourselves a second for that. Oh, I can see my producer, Cameron. He's. He's typing to me now. Who's the next caller? Here we are, coming up. Coming up. Oh, just put her on, for goodness sakes. Or him. Shauna. There it is. Hi, Shauna, how are you? I'm good. How are you? Oh, good. There you are. You were coming in a little rough there. Now you sound better.

Sorry, I'm in Alaska.

Oh, you're in Alaska. Maybe that helps explain Alaska.

I'm excited to talk to you.

You live there? Are you visiting? Hi.

I've lived here for the last five years. I'm originally from the East Coast.

Ah, all right, so from cold to cold.

From cold to cold, Right.

I'm assuming you mean the east coast, like New York, not Florida, right?

Yeah, like Massachusetts, Maine.

All right, what can I do for you?

Well, so I'm calling. I have a lot going on right now. My husband and I were rebuilding a foreclosure in a beautiful area. It's a lot of work. And I'm doing a big pageant that I really want. I'd love for it to go somewhere. And I also have this wonderful job that I would like to go somewhere. And I. I mean, I guess I just would like you to kind of look into my flow and see what's going on. Because I sometimes I feel sure of all these things to really push forward, and then other times I feel something. I don't know. Yeah.

So give me something a little more precise. Give me an example.

An example. I'm competing in the Mrs. Alaska America pageant this year.

Ooh, fun.

Yeah, it's really exciting. And I'm, you know, I am not being too hard on myself about it, but I really kind of trust myself. And I know that if I one the crown, I could do a lot of wonderful things, hopefully in the community, as could other women.

But I.

Would love that opportunity and I would love for that to help take me places and fulfill some dreams. But I know life can go a million different directions. So I guess I'm wondering about direction.

Well, I'm not going to make a prediction whether or not you'll win the crown because I don't want to put any ideas into your flow. Right. That will then make you direct yourself toward those. If I told you you'll win number one, right. Then you're going to be disappointed if you don't. But if I say you won't win anything, you'll say, oh, well, why am I trying? And then you'll self fulfill that prophecy. So I'm going to pull back from that. But I will say that you're using this for multiple. Multiple levels, right? Multiple reasons. One, you feel like you need something to stand on. You feel like you need some. Some stature. Right. And this is what will give it to you. It's giving you some kind of legitimacy or it's giving you a bullhorn. It's giving you something you feel you don't have on your own. And yes, you're helping the community, but it's also for something inside of you, right. Approving to yourself. And I was glad to hear you say you were being gentle with yourself as you did this. Right. Because the proving to yourself is I would love to be able to win something. I would like to be seen. I would like to be acknowledged by the world. And this is one method, one route for doing so. There are many methods, many routes for being seen or acknowledged by the world. And if this one you end up going through, and you don't like it, you can pick another one, and then you can pick another one until you reach the point where you say, I have been seen. I've been felt. I have a podium now where I can make a difference. And that's the energy that I see you most trying to change this feeling. Like, I don't have a podium. Do you know what I mean by that? A podium. A place that I can speak from or act from or work from. No one takes me seriously enough. I'm not important enough. Can you feel it? So here's what I would do in your flow, right? I would flow, dream this feeling, this emotion, over and over, flow. I am important, and how I think is important, and what I feel makes a difference, and the world responds to me. I'm constantly being given more and more. What do you call it? Opportunity to make a difference. I'm given more and more chances to go in there and create or direct or represent. And this is happening through this Miss America or Miss Alaska. But it's also happening in other ways, too. Flo is asking me, show up, show up. And I am. I'm saying, yes, I will. And I can feel that. I can feel my importance spreading out, spreading out. And it's filling me up, too. Maybe I didn't realize I was an empty well, but I do. I feel it now. What I do is important, and it's filling up my well of meaningfulness. I have meaning. I'm meaningful. I'm meaningful. That's the core that I feel inside of you, the thing that you're trying to pursue right now. Can you feel that? Did it reach something?

Yeah, absolutely.

Thank you. Yes. Yeah, I'm meaningful. Just be in that place. You don't need to win anything to actually prove it to you. Start being in your flow and allow your flow to bring you in more and more examples of how meaningful you are. Okay? Yeah. And then at a certain point, all of that will be healed up and changed in you, and you can go on and develop something else inside yourself. All right? All right.

Thank you so much.

All right, Wonderful. Thanks so much, Shauna. Take care. Have a happy day in Alaska. Bye now. All right, we're going to go to another quick break. When we get back, I think we're gonna end up doing a flow dream together. Ooh. And it's gonna be a gushy, squishy, nice one, right? All about feeling good and feeling gentle. So stick with me. We'll be right back after this. Here we are on a Quick break and I have a few suggestions for you. First of all, if you're one wondering how to Flow dream or what Flow Dreaming really is, I have a free gift bag of downloads for you on my website right now. Go to flowdreaming.com, enter your email. That's it. You'll get the downloads right then, instantly. And they're a 30 minute tutorial on how to flow dream. And I give you a free Flow dream to start with. This saves me from reteaching the the basics over and over again on this show and it gives you the first step toward a freaking awesome life. You're going to find these downloads on my homepage right now. So pop in your email and I'll send them right over to you. Next. My manifesting shop@flowdreaming.com is what underwrites this entire show. It brings it to you free every week and it has for the last 10 years, which is saying quite a lot. And what's there, Amazing playlists on all kinds of topics. MP3s, flow dreams that end fear that get you unstuck, that can get you to your perfect career, that can get you out of debt, help you find your soulmate so much more. These playlists are incredibly powerful, highly effective. My inbox is full every day with thank you notes from lottery winners, people who've just gotten married, people who've received eye popping bonuses, who've reduced massive amounts of pain or healed themselves in so many different ways. So please go visit the manifesting store@flow dreaming.com and see what you want to pick up and start using to change your life with. Okay, back to the program. Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. Are you guys ready? Shall we jump into flow together? Right. Flow really is yummy. That's why I have to make those silly noises. Because when you go into flow with a state of joy, state of happiness, I'm always telling, you know, my clients and my students in me school, you know, I laugh a lot and I laugh because laughter moves energy, right? Laughter creates ease. That's what laughter is. When you erupt in laughter, it's a ripple of free energy that just moves through you, right? And the other kinds of free energy like that, that just erupt and move through you are typically crying and I'd rather not be crying all the time. So I err on the side of laughter and ease and flow and being gentle with myself. Okay, if this is your first time, Flow Dreaming. Flow Dreaming is not meditation. It is an emotional exercise, an emotional experience. We use guided daydreaming so you'll hear me give you things to see, right? Imagine yourself. Use your imagination to get into this space. Your imagination is. Think of it like a bridge. And you're going to walk over this bridge to get to the other side where the flow is. And once you find yourself in flow, a curious thing happens, right? Flow can be a river. It can be a stream. It can be a sense of gorgeous, beautiful, easy forward movement. It can be you riding on the back of angel wings. It can be this sense of peace, everything good and right. I move in the direction of my most beautiful expansion, right? Flow is a sensation. It's an awareness. It's an understanding that where I'm going and what I'm feeling is great, is good. This is God, this is Source. This is universal consciousness. This is my own highest self. And I'm releasing into it. I'm just going to relax into it. And then you start to lose track of time. And you forget how long you've been doing this for. And then you forget where you are, that you're even just sitting in a room. You forget that, too. You've lost time and space. It's just like when you're daydreaming and you, you. You realize that, you know, the last five minutes have gone by. You didn't even realize that you ended up, you know, leaving the office and getting in your car and getting started, and suddenly you're five blocks away from work and you realize, I've been daydreaming the whole time. I can't believe I even backed out. But you did. Or when you're reading a book and you're so involved, so engrossed with the characters, you forget where you are. You forget how much time has passed. This is the daydream that you get into when you flow. Dream. Except what's going on in this daydream? What's the content? Right? Partly it's flow, partly it's this awareness. Yes, I am caught. I am wrapped in these universal arms, this forward flowing, beautiful, easy sensation. I, after all, am moving forward in my life right now. Seconds are ticking by, and I am traveling through time and I'm traveling through space. And I'm becoming very, very aware of that. What is happening? What will happen next. This is the third important component of flow. Dreaming emotion, right? This is where we become aware, awake within our flow. We don't talk to it. We don't have to slam it full of pictures if we don't want to. But we do have to feel what we feel in this state is what we become. When you create a beautiful pattern of feelings inside of your flow, what you're saying to your higher self, to the universe to flow is, this is who I am. This is what I'm becoming. This is what I'm resonating to. So everything in my life needs to now match what I have just created, these feelings inside me. This is why it's the primary method I use for manifesting. It's the only method, to be honest. So when I'm manifesting being gentle with myself, right, I'm actually creating a characteristic. That's what I'm manifesting. I'm not manifesting a thing. I'm manifesting a characteristic. I am gentle with myself. So with that long lead up, close your eyes with me. Let's jump into flow together. Let's jump into this feeling of everything is good and right in my world. I'm at peace and I'm relaxed. Deep breath, relaxing. Don't bring any stress into this. Don't bring any stress in your body. You don't need to let it all go. Let your shoulders drop, let your jaw release, Release, release, release. Just release and feel yourself releasing like you're an ice skater releasing from the rail or releasing from the tree trunk or the friend's hand. You don't need to know how to ice skate, Just pretend you do. You do. In your imagination. You know exactly how it feels. It's a strong, powerful feeling of letting go, of pushing your legs forward one at a time. And you're not on a pond. You're on a straightaway. You're going into the future. You're going into this beautiful space. Way up ahead. Somewhere up there, there's the Emerald Castle. You're on a long, glittery, golden road, powerfully moving forward, moving into your future, moving into your tomorrow, moving into next moment, moving into the next little bit of physical existence. One bit of physical existence after another. There you go. Keep going. There you go. So easy. Do you feel that? It's really easy to do this. It's really easy to live life. It's easy to live your life. Say it. It's easy to live my life. It's so easy to live my life. And you look at those things that we're bringing up conflict. Those things that seemed hard, like, oh, little hard bits in my life. What are those? Go on, feel them. Feel them popping out. Maybe it's a person's face, a relationship. Maybe it's a workplace. Do you feel the hard bits? Ah, yeah, there they are. But how are you experiencing, really, how are you experiencing them? You say I'm easy with myself, I'm gentle with myself around you. Yeah, you're challenging. Yes. You're rough. Sometimes you push me into lack thinking and fear thinking and I get all riled up against you and afraid and worried and upset and angry at myself. And when I let you do that to me, I. I realize, oh, you got to me. You did, you got to me. But then I let that go. Because you know what? I'm gentle with myself, Love myself. I know that I will always get past and through anything and everything. All the little hard bits, I will get past and through them. So do I want to get past and through them by beating myself up or do I want to get past and through them by being gentle with myself? I think I want to be gentle with myself. Feel that? What does it feel like to say that to yourself? I think I want to get through these by being gentle with myself. I do. I trust I will take care of it, I will go into it, I will fix it, I will solve it. But I'm going to be gentle with myself. As I do, I'm going to be gentle with myself. That's an experience I want to have. That's an experience I want to take in to be. Because I think if I do that it's going to spill over into everything in my life. I might find myself being gentle with other people, being more gentle with my kids, being more gentle with my partner, being more gentle with my family, gentle with my co workers. I might find myself starting to come at them with love. Even when they do something that they wonky or irritating that normally would have made me angry or upset. I'm being gentle and I'm saying that's wrong, that's incorrect or I don't, I don't stand that. I have great boundaries, but I feel gentle about it. Doesn't rile me, doesn't upset me, doesn't send me into anguish. Say I'm gentle with you and I'm gentle with me. Now what's the next step? Now what do we need to do? And I let that beautiful feeling wash through me. A feeling I'm just getting to know. What is that like? Oh, I see what that's like. And I settle into that feeling of what it's like. Thank you, thank you Flo, for letting me feel this. And now, whenever you're ready, you find yourself returning, your mind coming back, your emotions coming back from flow returning. And when you're ready, you Open your eyes. And there you have it. A Flow dream to be gentle with yourself. Could you feel that? Imagine how that energy would impact everything in your life if that energy, that emotion, that flow was inside everything you encountered. Be mind blowingly different. Powerful stuff we work with here. All right, that wraps it. Thank you guys for hanging out with me for the last hour. We'll be back. Another episode coming up next week. Another podcast episode of Flow Dreaming coming at you. So I'll see you then. Until till next time. I love you guys and take care and be well and be in flow. Well, look at that. Show's over. But before you go, did you know that my mom has a podcast too? Her show airs live right after mine. It comes up next. We tape our live shows back to back. Her show is called the Dear Venus show. So stay listening and you can call in or look it up live on itunes if you're listening via podcast. Her show is really good. It's really funny. And she reads people's minds and futures and talks to dead people for real. It's called the Dear Venus show on itunes.