#559 Connectors (Rebroadcast)

Flow Dreaming.

It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does.

It gives you a feeling of power.

Again in your lives. Breathe. I'm Summer McStravik, and welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Hi, everyone.

Welcome to Flow Dreaming. We are starting today on a special new series of shows. Well, actually, I think we technically started last. Last week, but this is my first week where I'm really digging into it. We are pivoting. Pivoting here in Flow Dreaming. And that's. I think that's become my key word for the year. There are certain words. I'm already on a tangent, right? Certain words that you just start to notice come up again and again in your life. And they come in phases, right? And one year, it's like balance, balance, balance. This year, pivot, Pivot, pivot. Listen, in your own life, maybe you're getting the word pivot too. Maybe you're getting a different word, but for me, it's pivot. So we are pivoting. The Flow dreaming show after 13 glorious years where I talk about flow and I talk about how to get you in there and I talk about. Just really, I've spoken about 500. And what was it? What are we at? 59, 58. Something. Something outrageous about how to use flow and flow dreaming. So it's time for us to deviate and move in a new direction. This means you're gonna be hearing a lot more from old and new faces. Some of my old friends coming from hay house days, some of my new acquaintances. Friends, peers, colleagues. I will be doing interviews and I'm gonna be going far afield and asking questions related to the mind and related to the heart. And today is the first day where I've really chosen a new theme, a new subject that is sort of related to energy, sort of related to intuition. But it's kind of a bigger conversation that I wanna open up. And maybe you'll even find something of value inside yourself. Like, oh, my God, I didn't realize that I was one of these. Or, gosh, I didn't know that I could cultivate this. Or, huh. Never even thought about it that way. That's my aim and that's my goal. So today we're talking about connectors. Connectors. What are they? Right? They're this elusive breed. They're like snow leopards. Out there in humanity, there's not very many of them, but when you spot one, when you see them, they just glide effortlessly through our lives. And, well, unlike a snow leopard, which is the solitary animal, these connect, bring people together. They're like rolling balls of glue. Basically. Okay, you went from a snow leopard to a rolling ball of glue, but it's the same thing. Your job, your mission, your purpose, you don't even know it, but it is, is to bring people together, right? You see the invisible energy patterns of people themselves, what they're like, who they are, who should be talking to each other, who should know each other. I mean, I kind of. The more I've been thinking about this, the more I feel like it's the special class of people we ought to recogn and give you little badges. In fact, you know, in a way. Well, obviously, I just launched inflow radio.com, right? And I'm looking for connectors like these. I'm looking for them, I'm calling them ambassadors. And you guys have probably heard that term ambassadors, brand ambassadors. These are people who become champions, cheerleaders, kind of like your inner core, your super fans. You know, you lavish extras on them, you give them attention, and you give them things, you know, to make them, you know, aware that you see and feel and understand what they're doing is super, super cool. But they're not doing it for prizes and they're not doing it for gifts. They're doing it because their heart is there and they believe in it. And frankly, they just can't help themselves. Like, oh, I learned about something new and amazing. I have to tell everybody. It's this inner internal drive, this inner thing in them where they say, someone should know about this. So call them ambassadors, call them connectors. I think the old school way was call them networkers. And I don't know, networker for me just feels like, yes, I understand it's a big term network marketing and networking and networkers. But I like to use new, fresh language sometimes to kind of allow myself to examine something from a different angle. Because if I use an old word for something, I'm starting to then look at it from the perspective all the baggage that I've created in my head around the word, right. That's why I almost never say the word God. I do sometimes, but I usually say source or flow or, or universe or something a little different, right? So that I can keep kind of creating a new understanding around it. So follow me down the path today as we talk about these born connectors. So I think I got started thinking about these people when I heard about a book. I don't know, when did it come out? A year or two ago. It's called Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazi. And, you know, if I'd been more on top of my game, I would have connected with this fella and had him interviewed my show. And maybe I still will because I heard him in an interview, actually, and that's what inspired me to look into his work. But his basic idea is he lives in LA and he just, you know, hangs out with all the little stars and. And, you know, big wigs up there in Hollywood. And he throws these dinner parties, and he throws them about every week. And here's the key. He doesn't know the people he's inviting. He's like, I'm Keith Ferrazzi and I'm having one of my epic, notorious dinner parties for eight. Do you want to come? And everyone's like, yes, yes, I've been waiting for an invitation. The whole point of it is he's thinking, he's cultivating in his mind, who do I think should fit together, who should be talking with each other, who would make a fascinating conversation? And then he invites those people, carefully crafts it, and voila, this amazing, magical evening occurs. Now, he, of course, is like the connective Tiss, you know, in the body of this dinner party, bringing all these important people together, creating something not just for him, but it's actually to benefit every single person who shows up now. They know seven or eight other individuals who might help them in their career, who might become their new best friend, who might become their walking partner or their baby stroller walking partner, or who knows? And I thought, damn, I want to do that. I want to do that here in San Diego. I want to have dinner parties. I thought, oh, God, I don't know if I can do it every single week, but maybe once a month, you know, I could start something. So this is what got my head spinning and thinking. Of course, I haven't done it because I keep filling my life with all these other things. But the idea is there, you know, this is a perfect example of a person of a personality who is not trying to be in the spotlight himself, but he knows how to put things together that work. It's instinctual, it's intuitive. And maybe that's the real key here.

It's intuitive.

So I kept looking around online, trying to find, you know, more material about what makes a great connector, what makes a great networker. And honestly, if you Google it, There's.

Just a lot of crap out there.

It's just the same old articles over and over again telling you the top 10 ways you need to be to be a great networker. And every time I read one of these, I'm like, oh yeah, so basically change my whole personality. Awesome, that's gonna work for me. You know, you feel like, yeah, this is all great ideas, but you're either kind of this way or you're not. And if you're not this way, you're putting on this facade, right? I mean, I know from doing my own flow dreaming work, I know it's possible to change my personality, to change my characteristics, but it takes deep work, it takes daily work going in there, doing my emotional reconditioning. You know, if I hear something that says be generous, right? In fact, I'm staring at a webpage right now and the number four item on it to be a great networker is to be generous, right? Have that giving spirit go into a room not thinking about what you're going to get from it and who you might meet and how they're going to help you. But go in thinking, how can I help this person who is in here that I can be of benefit to beautiful, loving community, tribe oriented feeling and spirit. But in order to be generous, it's something you have to cultivate in yourself, right? Because oftentimes when we're walking into a room with other people, we're feeling self conscious, we're feeling a bit closed off, we're not feeling totally at ease. We're saying, I'm going to take my time and kind of, you know, adjust my energy space into the room so that I can kind of be at the same level with it. These are all things that I say to myself. I imagine you say them to yourself too. So be generous is like number eight on my list behind all my other gunk that's getting in the way. But if I do a little flow dreaming ahead of time and I go, okay, I'm here to be of service and I don't know where this service will lead and I know that it's not going to be tit for tat service, right? It's not going to be like, I'm going to help this person and this person and this person and all three of them are going to help me back. No, maybe only one of them will help me back. The other two take my help, walk off and leave. But one of them might help me back. And maybe that one person who helps me back does so in such a way that it compensates for the other five or ten people that I have helped that didn't get something back for. Maybe it will, maybe it won't. The idea, though, is you're coming out there with this generous spirit, this generous feeling. But this isn't something that if you're not naturally that way, and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with you if you're not naturally generous. What I've seen over the years is that we're generous in different ways, right? I'm insanely generous with my family. If my kids need new clothes, I'm on Amazon and I am buying those new swim trunks in a heartbeat. But if I am out at the store and I'm looking at a beautiful new swimsuit, I go, oh, I don't really need that. I shouldn't spend the money on it, right? I learned to recognize that's an aspect of my generosity. My family, no questions asked. Somebody needs something, I'll get it for you. I'll do everything I can. We're all like this generous in certain ways, in certain areas. And it's not that we're not generous in others. It's just our awareness isn't open to being generous in that respect to others. We kind of. It's like a blank spot in our vision. Not that we are selfish. So if you have that feeling about yourself, please get going on correcting that. Discover where you are generous. It is in you. So how do you extend that generosity now to other people, People that you don't know, people that you don't have a relationship yet? What's getting in the way of that? Is there a barrier of trust? Is what. What is the barrier that's coming up for you? Anyway, so, as you know, I kind of peruse these sites and I keep looking. You know, another one that comes up a lot is to listen actively. Be a great listener. Okay, folks, if you haven't noticed, that.

Is not one of my skills.

I am good at talking and communicating and channeling information out and through and to. Listening is something I have to work at. Listening is something I have to remind myself. Bite your tongue, absorb, take in, ask questions. So for me, that's something again, that I am actively trying to cultivate in myself so that I can become a better connector. Okay? So I am not. My intuitive, my empathic abilities are not such that I am a connector. I do other things with them. So in order to enhance those skills in me, I have to work at it, right? And maybe you do too. Listening is something that I have to work at. And I often find myself saying, oh, I'm sorry. You go ahead. Oh, you go ahead. It's like one of my fallbacks now because I'm talking over people and I recognize it and. Oh, wait, sorry. No, you. No, you. Right. So I'm training myself over time, be a listener, find out what other people need. Now, it's not just about what other people need, but a real connector is somebody who puts people together. So I'm finding out what they need. And then there is the other aspect. Who do I know who has that? Because it's not always me, right? I'm not the be all, end all, everything. I don't contain the world. Other people. Other people are where the gold is at. So who needs to meet who? Right? Who? Who needs to meet whom? In fact, I would love it today if you guys thought in your minds about one or two people that you can connect together. Who needs to meet? Who needs to meet whom? Think about it. See what happens if you pair them up. So I actually have a really good friend who is a connector, and I interviewed her. I talked to her last night. We did this kind of kind of late, so, you know, excuse the conversation if it's. If it's a little goofy. I think it's pretty good, though. But I want to just kind of roll this clip of my interview with her. And then when we're done, I'm going to open up these phone lines for you guys because I would love to hear your thoughts on being a connector, Your thoughts on being a communicator and on being a networker. Do you struggle with it? What's easy for you? Do you know people who are like this? What are your idea of traits that they have? And let's kind of explore this. But first, let's roll that clip of myself and Miranda. So I want to introduce one of my oldest and best friends, Miranda Muse. And I've known Miranda since ninth grade. And I asked her to come on with us because I felt like. I always feel like this. She is one of these born connectors. She's one of these natural networkers. She is always connecting people and putting them together, and it just blows my mind. And I keep telling her this is a crazy skill set. Hi, Miranda.

Hi.

Hi.

Aloha.

Aloha. You spent so much time in Hawaii, and you still were connecting people there. Okay, so let me tell you what I mean by you being a connector. So whenever we're talking, at a certain point, you Say, do you know so and so. Oh, my God, she is the most amazing person. She can do this with that. And she's just like, oh, my gosh. And you have. Let me introduce. You totally get together. You have. You would completely connect. And I say, oh, okay. And by the time you're done talking about this person, I think they're a superstar. And I can't wait to meet them. Do you know you do this?

Yeah, I know I do this. You told me I do this. You made me very aware of it.

Yes, but did you ever know you did that before someone pointed it out to you?

No, I didn't. I just thought everyone did it.

Yes, everyone. Most people. One, we don't naturally think of pairing people with other people. Right. So right off the bat, that's different. But you always seem to be able to do that.

Yeah, it just comes really naturally to me. I get a tremendous amount of satisfaction from doing it. And it's just like this big old fireball inside of me, and I just. Oh, I just gotta put these people together because I know if I do it, everything amazing is gonna happen. Or not. I mean, it's really up to them. But there's something inside of me that just really wants to put those two people together because I know that it can help each other out. They can help each other out.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's like you're a natural matchmaker, right? Like, matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. You're always making matches. You're constantly making matches. And then the actual.

Actually, it's funny that you said that, I have to say. Funny thing you'd say. Well, last year, I guess. Well, it was about a year and a half ago. My. My boyfriend, now his. I would say I introduced my co worker to his roommate about two weeks after I met him. And then in November, they got married.

Wow. So you. Do you know what? It's almost like. It's almost like an intuitive sense, isn't it?

Yeah.

Like you just kind of have a feeling. You just know and it hits you and you have to do something about it.

Yeah. It's like it's yelling at me inside. The way I see it is. Yeah. Remember when we used to get the sheets for Connect the Dots when we were kids? It's almost like this feeling of. You have these two people, so you got these two dots and this line just somehow appears between the two. Knowing that I have to put these people together. And it's usually something that they need to fulfill each other, where it's a win, win situation. And I just know I just have to put them together. Like that invisible thread.

Yeah. It almost makes me wonder, as if, you know, this is yet another form of intuition, you know, like a little variation on it. Like, some people are medical intuitive, some people are future readers. You're like pairings reader, you know what I mean? Like. Like its own unique little subset of inner knowing or intuitive knowing or empathic knowing. I wonder what our. What our listeners think about that. They're like, yeah, maybe it is. I think I might have that too. Because, like, you know, that's like a hallmark of empaths. We're doing the work, we're doing this, and yet we don't know. We think everybody's doing this. We assume because it's so natural. And like I just said, do you know it's not natural. A lot of people, one, nobody else ever pops in their mind when they're talking to you. Like to you or to me, you know, it's not like I talk to you and I don't immediately think of four other people who are like you that you need to know. I just don't. I just don't do it right. Doesn't come to me.

It must be a unique quality for.

It is a unique, unique quality for a unique lady. And you know, the other thing that you do, besides just that you even think of it in the first place, is when you describe people and you talk about people, you have this way of seeing them very naturally, and there's nothing fake, nothing put on about it. You have, most of the time, absolutely nothing to gain, even by pairing people up. I mean, it's not like you're doing this for business, which I always tell you. Would you please go into pr? Would you please go into pr? It'd be so great. But nonetheless, that's another story. But you have this way of making people sound amazing. Like you see all their glitteriest, shiniest, best, you know, absolute, their most amazing side. That's the side that's visible to you. It's like their sun is always turned toward you. You don't, you know, it's like you. And that's the way you naturally are viewing people and seeing people. I think that also kind of flows into your ability and your desire to want to connect people with each other. Have you thought about that either?

Yeah. And you and I have talked about this too, and it's true. Well, part of it is I know some really wonderful, amazing people and also living in Hawaii, there's amazing People there. And there are a lot of change makers. They're just doing wonderful things and their vibrations are very high. So I see, See, I have that opportunity to be around those kinds of people, so that's easy. And I do that anyway. Or even for the people who are not maybe doing as much and maybe a little bit more shadowy side, I guess, because I acknowledge that everyone has a shadow side. But I've always been one of those people who just sees the good in people and, you know, that sometimes can go not so good because you don't want to see other parts. You don't want to look at that. Yeah, when I are putting people together, that's what shows up. It's very much a win. It's the positive side that comes out. And like I said, there's some wonderful people I know, and I just want to put them all together and just have a big old party.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, I see it as a gift because it is so natural. Whereas other people. And this is a complaint often I hear from people who want to be better networkers. You know, they want to be better in business and they want to grow their clientele and they want to grow their coaching or they want to. They want to grow things. But it's hard for them to talk to other people and say, oh, you're so good at this and you're wonderful at that. And it's like they feel embarrassed about saying it or they feel. And I know you don't relate to this at all, but a lot of people do. You know, they just, they would feel like, oh, people would think I'm just talking them up, I'm brown nosing, you know, and so they, it's almost like they purposely hold back from those compliments or from that acknowledgement because they don't want to seem a certain way. You know, it's like they get in the way of themselves, essentially. Did you ever notice that with people or other people?

Are you talking about talking about other people to those people? Is that what you're talking about?

I'm talking about people talking to other people about those people. Whose people are talking about those people? Yeah, that's.

That's what I thought you were saying.

Yeah, exactly. That's what I thought. No, no, no. I'm talking about, let's say I have somebody who wants to grow their company and network more and they're like, I'm such a lousy networker, I go talk to people and I should connect them to somebody else. I know. But then I Don't want to seem like I'm bragging if I know that person, or I don't want to seem like I'm being phony. And so they hold themselves back and they keep their mouth shut. And they don't make those connections.

No, they need to say something. Because you're coming from a genuine place. You're not trying to brand nose. If you're coming from a place of really wanting to put someone together, people are gonna feel that. You know, it's funny because I can't really network for myself. I'm good for other people, you know, because it's like I. There's nothing for me to gain in a lot of ways, so it comes for me. It's more genuine, you know, you're doing.

It for nothing or not nothing, but just for the good of all. It's not like you're getting any personal thing from it. But if you were to get something personal from it, I wonder if you would hold back too.

Yeah, it sounds like you did. You just kind of admitted it, right? I have, I have. And it's funny because you know people, I have a lot of friends who do network marketing and they'll say, oh, but you'd be so good at this. Can you do this? I'm just like, it's just not me. You know, there's nothing wrong with it.

Right.

And that's something that I am still working on in my own growth. But for when it comes to other people, it's, you know, I mean, there's times I can say, oh, yeah, I can do that. I'm perfect for this. And if I know it and I feel it.

Yes.

But you know, we're always, again, we're all working on different issues, but for other people, it's fun. It's really fun because I know they're gonna benefit.

You're not very common.

I think as this kind of person, you're like, oh, I'm unique, I'm unusual. Yes, you are. You're one in a million. I'm thinking of there's only two other people who actually pop in my mind. Actually three other people who pop in my mind. But out of like hundreds of people I know, right. One is a guy named Dan. He puts on events, and I was lucky enough to share a cab ride with him to an event that we were both going to. And we're talking in the car, and I swear it was like a 20 minute cab ride. By the time we got out, he had three or four people that I definitely, absolutely had to meet. And then all during the conference, he kept bringing people up to me, like, oh, so and so is looking for inflow radio. And so and so was looking for some flow dreaming. And. And I just kept. I was like, I'm not paying this guy. I mean, he's just doing this, you know? And I had to compliment him. I'm like, wow, you're. You're crazy good at this, you know? And for him, it just felt like, well, that's what you do. It just makes events so much more fun when you can introduce people and create big, you know, table parties. And everybody's, like, helping each other. And I just like, dan, I love you. Yeah. And then.

Absolutely, he's right.

Yeah. Okay. And then there's another gal, Anne, actually, Ann Perry. Some people probably know her. She used to have business, Heroin magazine. Now she has the Elf Society. She's that way. She just knows everybody. And she's so genuine in her connectivity ability. I love you, Ann. And then a third person is a gal named Becky, who's just, like, a local friend of mine, actually. And, you know, she's. You know, her gift is the same. I was talking with her, what, a couple weeks ago, and before we had finished our conversation, she was gonna hit me up with biotech firms that might employ my daughter as an intern over the summer, as well as a great body worker in Carlsbad. And then there was, like, somebody else. I swear there was a third person. And I actually got the notes out on my phone, and I'm typing in my app, like, all these people that I have to. I must reach out to now, because Becky told me to.

But it means part of it is all that abundance that you put out, too. Like, part of it's you who is attracting all this. So there's a lot to be said for that as well.

Well, thank you. I just thought it was kind of cool to explore this idea of you being a unique type of energy or person or soul or even, like, a subspecialty of a kind of empathic understanding, you know, this connective energy. Like, I want to name it. I want to call this a thing.

Let's give it a name.

Oh, God. Okay, can we think maybe we'll ask our listeners after this. Also give me some names for this great idea. Wouldn't that be cool? And then maybe we'll find a new career for me. I know. And everybody will be talking about it, and we'll be like, yeah, we coined it in this podcast, you know, from way back when.

Yes, she's an empathic networker.

Empathic networking, you know? You know, it's not like a medical intuitive or a. I got it. We got to think. We got to think. We got to think and find something.

You know, I think something. I mean, when I'm listening to you and the people that you've met, all these people seem like they really like to have a good time.

They like.

The social aspect of it. Just people having fun. And that's a big thing. Fun. And we want to bring people together to not just, you know, do just bring them together, but when you're bringing. When you're having these projects, start getting into. Sorry. When you're starting to bring people together to make projects and make your dreams come true, it's fun. You're having a good time. And I think there's that theme where everyone just. Everybody wants just to have a good time and be happy. And this is one way to do that, at least in my realm, that's what that looks like.

Yeah. So these are super collaborative people, people who enjoy working with others, and the kind of person who, if they said, I'm going to start a business, they would say, I'm going to start a business with a partner, as opposed to.

I'm starting a business.

Right.

I need a partner.

I need other people, because that's how I work. That's like my best environment to work in. That also sounds like it. So all the solo players out there probably are not gonna be quite as this way. Or maybe it goes hand in hand, you know, and I'm a Gemini.

We're very social, we're very talkative. And party. Party town, you know, has a lot to do with it, too.

Yeah. We won't be sharing those stories on air.

No, no, no. Some stories are made for not sharing.

Made for teenage years. Yeah. So that's a really, really good point about. About the natural joy that you have. Just the more people I can put in connection with each other, the bigger my circle of fun becomes, because.

Absolutely.

People are not isolated and separated. And I think for most of us, you know, our hardest. Our biggest thing is just getting over ourselves to do that. Just something in us just prevents us from talking up other people, connecting other people, starting with one. It just doesn't even occur in our heads. But then when it does occur, you know, I guess that's what I want us to look at. You know, if we're. If we're thinking about, how could I become more this way, what is that piece in me that shuts my mouth down instead of opens it to share.

Well, I think if everyone realizes that how much life improvement and joy that could bring by helping other people come together, you're not doing it for yourself. You're doing it for others. I mean, you're doing it for yourself in a way that it just feels good. And if you're to network for yourself, which is coming to me now, we have our own insecurities. Well, maybe I'm not good enough and maybe they won't like this or like me. But if you can get over that and just share what you're about and say, this is what I have to offer to the world and I'm really good at it and I'm stoked to do it. And, you know, if this resonates with you, then great, now you know about me. Because if you don't say anything, no one's gonna know. You just gotta put it out there.

I know. And with that, I think that's a really great way to close our little conversation. You just gotta put it out there. So thank you, my darling Miranda, and for coming on and. Oh, my God, finally being part of this show after what, 13 years and 30 years.

All right, well, thank you for having me. This has been fun and I really enjoyed it. And I hope some people, somebody gets something out of it.

Just not to be scared and just.

Go have a good time and put people together and have a party.

I know.

Yeah.

And if you want it, if you really want to network, go. I'm gonna. I'm gonna do a little plug right now for the inflow radio group. That's where we all get together and network and the hosts are there and you guys are there and share with each other and chit chat. And it's a great way to find other people who think and feel like you, because we're all listening to the same shows and, you know, enjoying the same kinds of materials and topics.

And we're looking for our tribe.

We're looking. You know what? That's a big reason why I built this entire network. Because now I have a tribe for 10, 20 years. You know, I. 30 years. However long we do this for, he's like, I've got my tribe now.

And.

And it's just such a relaxing, settling kind of feeling. So selfish reason. I want my tribe. All right, so we're gonna go to a quick break, and when we get back, we will about flow, dreaming, connecting what it's like to be a super networker or not to be one. Maybe you are One, maybe you've got some insights and ideas and I'd love to hear from you. So be thinking and hop on the phone lines with me and I'll talk with you in just a few minutes.

We're on break and while I give myself a second to regroup, I'd like you to consider what having private mentoring with me would be like. You see, I accept a small number of people each year for private coaching. The question is, what do you want to make? Who do you want to become? We can program and shape any area of yourself or your life. Imagine right now what you would be doing if you had no fear.

Imagine how your life would look if.

There were no patterns and blocks repeatedly tripping you up. Imagine if you were fully healed in your heart, body and mind. Imagine if you also had a map to your success and you could follow it with ease and flow. Well, I look into you and into your life and I feel where you're going and know where the road is open and where it's blocked. I help you make the very best decisions based on what's coming up for you. I'll also show you exactly what I do day to day to succeed in my personal and business life and we can create a copycat plan for you.

So if you're game, you can fill.

Out an application on my website for private coaching. Just go to flowdreaming.com coaching and then let's talk. I mean the time to go for it is now. So let's just get this started now. Let's get back to the show. In case you missed it, the number to call to talk to me live is the US number 1764 567-277. Flow Dreaming airs live on Tuesdays, so check flowdreaming.com for my current live broadcast time. Again, reach me at 1-760-456-7277. Now let's get back to the show.

So what did you think of that interview? I was kind of cracking up listening to it myself because obviously talking to my old girlfriend from junior high brings out that oh my God's in me. Heard myself say that a few times and cringed. Nice to be aware of your, huh? Anyway, let's open up to calls. By the way, the Number here is 1-760-456-7277 and you can also find that up there on the website. What did you guys think? Are you a connector? Are you this person? Do you know people who are like this? What do you think about them? Do you want to be like this. Do you think it's an intuitive sense. Call them. Let's just have a conversation. I see already that we've got Kelly. Kelly from Austin, Texas. Hello. Hello. Hi, welcome. You're on air.

Can you hear me?

Yes.

Hi, Summer. It's nice to finally talk to you. I was one of Your Emmy School 3, probably the worst student you've ever had, unfortunately.

Oh, no, don't say that.

But it's amazing that I'm talking to you live on this call of all the ones that I made, because connecting is sort of. It really is my life, too. And it was interesting when you were talking to Miranda, because I was like, oh, no, I do that. I do that.

You're one of those. Okay, okay, so mini interview, then. How do you do it and who do you do it with and how come you can do it?

That is maybe because I've worked out of my house for so long, I'm not working right at the moment. But that was my way of staying engaged is I just am very good with being on Instant messenger and keeping up and asking and being curious about my friends that I work with. And it just, I get curious enough about people and about what they do and when they talk enough, I start to think, oh, you'd be. Even in business senses, you'd be a great fit with that company or that person. And. And I've helped people find jobs and do other things that way. And I've had partners I've worked with that have said, you're just good at that. That's just, you know, you have a better network than anybody I know. And it just comes naturally to me. So it's not even I can think about doing it right.

It's just like, it. Very helpful. Well, yeah, thanks a lot, Kelly. Very unhelpful phone call. No, I'm kidding. It sounds like, I mean, you're kind of echoing, Miranda. You're echoing, you know, these other people I've talked to where it really is like an in, like an intuitive talent. And when you said you help people get jobs, I'm thinking, I've worked with recruiters before, and I think that the good ones also have this talent. They just know, like, these people need to go together. They just, they fit together. And, you know, historically, matchmakers, you know, who, you know, get people married with each other, people who are, who are, you know, on those dating sites that, that, that actively, you know, match profiles. So many different industries, I think, probably take advantage of this particular type of skill that we never even think About. Right. So you're. You said you're not working. You would hope so. Yeah. You're not working. Are you going to go into one of these areas?

I would hope so. I mean, that was sort of, you know, it kind of builds into my question that I found it interesting that you brought that up because so many people seem to find that important. And yet, I guess because I've worked mostly for large companies, they haven't always. And, you know, I don't know if you can see that. Oh, yes, you are going to be able to utilize that somewhere in the future soon. Because I'm not finding that people find that as important.

Hmm. Well, they're obviously not looking in the right place then. I mean, I think that maybe the whole, the whole social media thing has skewed people's understanding of this. They think that just because you're posting and you're tweeting and Instagramming that you're somehow connecting and that to me, the whole social media share thing is a different, like there's a different nuance about it. It's me sharing to you, right? That's social media. Me sharing to you, generally. Yeah, right, yeah. Where a connector. It's not. This is something that I'm doing that I'm getting out there or I'm sharing on behalf of my company to all of the consumers, you know, via social media. A connector is these, these other two people I have no vested interest in. This should be paired off together. I mean, imagine if everybody was using social media like that. Like, hi, Bob, meet John. Hi, John, meet Sarah. Hi, Sarah, meet. You know what I mean? But we don't, we don't use it that way. So you're, you're still special. And, and, and yeah, I wonder how you could list that on a resume. Natural born connector.

Yeah.

Right.

Well, and y', all, I don't think, come up with a name. The organizational empathic, I think could be good.

Ooh, Organizational empathic.

Yeah.

You're going down the right direction with that. God, I don't know. I don't know. Organizing people, things together, it's like pinpoint to pinpoint, point to point, the point to point. Empathic.

Something like that.

Oh, gosh. So you're looking for work, huh? And what areas are you thinking about going in or branching out into?

I've been in technology mostly, but I'm thinking about now. I mean, staying in there, but maybe doing more of a recruiting side, which I haven't. I've worked with business partners in the past and Connecting business partners with business partners, which has been great for the partners, but not always for me.

Yeah. So maybe it's time to think about capitalizing on that skill. Right. If it is a skill, if it is a talent, you know, you're like a painter giving away your paintings for free. And I wonder if, you know, like Miranda said, if you start charging for it, are you not as able to do it? Is it not? Are you not as effective with it? Because, you know, that's her issue. Because once she's getting a personal gain out of it, it shuts down.

Right.

You ever felt that way?

I can see that. And I don't even know how. I mean, unless it was formalized how I would go about doing that. But it's certainly an area to explore.

Yeah. Well, you know, if you were doing it for other people, if you were working in another tech company and your point was to form sponsorships or partnerships, or, you know, go out and create, you know, advertising relationships, I mean, it's all similar. We'd all be using that same skill set. Can you see that?

Yes.

I mean, it's not sales. It's more just like we fit together. Like we fit together. That would be your mantra and your motto. We fit together or you fit together. And I'm not doing it on behalf of me, I'm doing it on behalf of the company. But you and this company fit together, and I'm representing this company. But even further afield from that, I just am very curious. If you were to push it, where else could you take it? You know, what, who, how else could you use this innate, you know, pairing instinct? Pairing instinct. Maybe that's another way of saying it. So where, you know, you're using a skill that's already easy for you. And that's another thing. It makes me think often when we have skills that are very easy for us, we discount them and we poo poo them and we're like, ah, that's not a big deal. It's easy. It's just. It's just natural. It's too natural to be important. Ever felt that way? Maybe.

I mean, I recognize that it's a little bit different just because I've had so many people say it. And I did work with a wonderful team at one point that we were the ocean's 11, and so we recognized that everybody had a different skill and you all didn't need to be great at all of them because you worked as a group. But you don't often get to work.

In teams like that, yes, great teams are exceptional. They're also rare finds. But. Yeah. So maybe just start to reevaluate that. The skill and talent in yourself and recognize that because it's such an easy, natural thing. It's like if you were born. Born with a musical ear. Right. I mean, they don't feel like, oh, just because I can, you know, write a piano concerto does. You know, it's not a big deal. It's. I shouldn't pursue that, you know, for a living. That's just too easy yet. Right. We tend to do that with things. So maybe you should look at that, too. I don't know. I just feel for you. Like, yes, you. You need to start moving your job hunt in that direction. Head it towards. Head it towards. Where am I capitalizing and expounding on this skill and clear out from your mind any of those feelings like. But they won't value it and they don't see it. You're actually looking for a perfect match for you. You're your own matchmaker right now. And this perfect company, this perfect place or these perfect clients, they'll see your matchmaking abilities and say, I want that. I see it. I recognize it. It. Because I know I'm not the only one in the world who values it and sees it, you know, I mean, I value it and see it because I don't have a lot of it in me. So I'm always looking for people on my team who can compensate for my lack of. So you're going to look for a company who does the same thing. They're compensating for their lack of by finding you.

Okay.

Right. That's. That's something I would meditate on. I'd flow on. I'd. I just really get inside myself. Just grow that feeling and go out there and grab them. So, Kelly, thank you. It's so nice to hear from you again. And no, you were not the worst.

And I appreciate it.

I wish you talk to me more. My goodness. But I'm glad you're still sticking around. Okay. All right. Thank you so much, my dear. Take care.

All right, thanks. Have a great time with inflow.

Thank you. All right, bye. All right, we've got some open lines here. 760-456-7277. I throwing you guys for a loop. You're like, well, I don't know what to say now. She switched up. We're just supposed to chat and talk. Well, yes, indeed. So I'll give you a few weeks to get used to it, and then I'd like to have you on air with me and we can have a little conversation. Um, again, if you know anybody who is a great networker, what do you think about them? What do you want to share about them if you yourself are that way? Like Kelly and Miranda and Ann and, you know, even Abby, she's another. She's another host here on inflow Radio. She's got the Abby money. I have a sneaking feeling that she's that way, but I'm still getting to know her. But I think I have a feeling it's in her, too. I'm starting to get good at, you know, kind of sussing it out and instantly picking up on it. Anyway, so, anyway, those are the kinds of things I want to talk with you about this hour. And if you don't call me, I'm just gonna have to keep, you know, discussing and playing around with these ideas myself. So I'll give you a second to call. We will go to another quickie, quickie little break. And we'll come right back after this for the finale of today's show on Connecting. Stay with me because we have some more good insights and suggestions for you to get better at your connective ability coming up right after this break.

While we're on break, have you checked out MI school? In MI School, we travel together through a year, through everything that you are. You get to discover what drives you, how you're made, and how powerful you actually are. We play with intuition and flow dreaming and dozens of other techniques as you go through one of the most potent, powerful and pleasurable personal development experiences you've ever seen. We continually co create your future, and I ask you to bring big goals to the table, things that you want to become inside yourself. And you'll reach these using the tools that you've probably never been exposed to.

Before in your life.

But you will be here in Misk. So if you're curious, go to flowdreaming.com.

And click on MI School. Set up a call, and we'll help.

You see exactly what you can do with your life.

And if you choose to come join me in MI school, then I look.

Forward to spending the next year with you as we work together to create miracles. In case you missed it, the number to call to talk to me live is the U.S. number, 1-1760-456-7277. Flow Dreaming airs live on Tuesdays, so check flowdreaming.com for my current live broadcast time. Again, reach me at 1-760-4567277. Now let's get back to the show. Hey, welcome back.

So we're going to cap off our show with a few other ideas to improve your intuitive connective abilities. Still looking for a good term by the way.

If you guys have any, you know.

Go post it on the.

Go post it on the inflow radio group page.

I'll take a look there. Or just email it to me directly. Summerflow radio.com or summerlowdreaming.com 1. One thing that Miranda brought up and Kelly brought up is that there's this joy for helping other people, right? You actually love it, you like it, it feels good to do. It's fun. As Miranda said, that's really key. But on the other side of fun, the thing that I have appreciate most about my connector friends is when they follow up. You know, oftentimes I feel like they're just kind of looping us together. And I always say, oh, you just said the name of a person that you think I should meet. And I make it habit then because I know that they don't necessarily follow up. My connector friends are often not the best follow uppers. So what I do is I pull out my phone and I put it down in my notes or I send a little text to myself or I somehow capture it and then I'll send a little note to them later and I say, hey, would you do an email, an email introduction between us or would you put us on a text thread together or would you FB messenger us together? So I actually take that next step and ask, can you follow through on this? And then they go, oh yeah, that's right. That's right, I will. So it's kind of like the part B. So if you are a good connector, maybe something you want to think about is how do I be a better follow upper with this, right? So that the fruits of my labors actually happen. And if you're not a great connector, what you want to do is you want to become a great follow upper like me, right? And I just, I'm always like, email, introduce me. Email, introduce me. And then I continue to follow up. You know, I have friends now who I've just discovered, you know, live in my town and you know, I'll meet them at a meeting or someplace and I'll say, look, let's go have coffee. And I've really started to make that be my on the tip of my tongue, let's have coffee. I know we just met over email. Let's have coffee, let's have coffee. I spend a lot of time having coffee right now. Good thing I like coffee. Coffee. But it's because I recognize my natural tendency would be to hold back and say, well, I don't know what I would talk to them about. I don't know why we'd meet. I don't know what's in it for each other. Right. I'm leaping ahead too much in my mind. I don't have to know what's in it for each other. I don't have to know if anything at all will come of this. All I need to know is I would like to meet you and talk and maybe we'll become friends and maybe we'll become business partners and maybe we'll become clients of each other. I don't know. No, let's just have coffee and have. And circles back to fun. So let's put that in your vocabulary. Let's have coffee. I'm following up and this is going to be fun. And then of course, the other things I mentioned in the beginning, be a good listener, right? Because that's how you discover who needs to be connected to whom. Because you're not talking about yourself, you're talking about them. And that's probably my number one advice for myself, aside from the following up. So I think if you focus on these particular areas, you can either grow and enhance your own connective skill set or better utilize your connector friends in your own life. I think, I think that's probably, probably key. And then, you know, kick back and start taking a look at what does this do for you? You know, what does it yield for you in your life. And yeah, it could be a crop of new clients and cash or it could be a crop of new friends and, you know, other parents you can start going out with and so on. So, yeah, keep that in mind. Let me know if you like my new format and I'll be back next week. We'll do something similar. New topic, new questions and new calls from you. So love you all and I'll see you next time for more Flow Dreaming.

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