#580: The Grind of Consistency

Flow Dreaming. It's a show where we talk about the power of your mind to change your world around you, to literally affect the fabric of your reality. We talk about this feeling of hope and joy and relief. And that is what being aware of your flow does. It gives you a feeling of power again in your lives. Breathe. I'm Summer McStravik and welcome. Welcome to another episode of Flow Dreaming. Welcome to Flow Dreaming. Hi everyone. I am your guest, or rather your your guest host. I'm not a guest, I'm a host. But you're my guest for the day. As we take a look at another aspect of our lives, our energies, our emotional selves. All related, of course, under this umbrella that I talk about known as Flow Dreaming, which is kind of a philosop at this point. It's a way of living, a way of thinking, a way of believing, a way of understanding how and why things happen in our lives and what position, what kinds of power we have in our lives with those things to co create, to flow with them, to resist them. Well, to do with whatever we choose. So today we have episode number 580, the grind of consistency. 580 hours. Yes, that means there are indeed 580 episodes of this show, Flow Dreaming. And if you're curious what the other 579 might be, I really urge you, go check it out. You can find it easily, easily either@inflowradio.com or in fact on the show page. Just look up Flow Dreaming. Or you can find it at itunes or on Google Play, on Spotify, on iHeartRadio and TuneIn. It's all over the place, in other words. So open up whatever app you use to podcast and take a listen. And if you really like the show, it warms my heart like to no end to see some great reviews go up. In fact, yes, I check them, I look and see, hey, what are you guys saying? And I noticed it's been a couple of months and I thought, oh, no one's left me a review in a couple of months. So I thought I'd send the word out and say, hey, if you like this, just pay it forward or pay it backward, however you look at it and just leave some nice words and I would really appreciate it. Okay, so getting into this idea, the grind of consistency, I know, doesn't that sound so like desperate and dour? It does indeed it does. What I really want to talk about is how people who are consistent in their lives tend to do well. Right? We all kind of acknowledge that if you have had consistency, consistency in your career. You stayed in the same field. You've gotten to the top of your field. If you're consistent in your savings and you're able to put money away, then you're probably going to have something at the end of your retirement when you start to need it. People who are consistent in their relationships, meaning you got married a long time ago and you built up your assets together and you built a family. It can really seem like, whew, man, Consistency is the way to go. The old tortoise and the hare. The tortoise has got it together and the hare doesn't. And I'm bringing this up today because, you know, I work with a lot of students, a lot of private students, a lot of my students, also in me school and in my mastermind. And it's a theme that pops its head up every now and then. There's always going to be someone who says, you know what? The consistency in my life got ruined, got destroyed. I got divorced. I left and started a new career. Something happened where all of that consistency was just ruined. And I have never been able to make it up again. It's gone. It's gone forever. And then there's another person who would say, well, I was never consistent in the first place. And that's my problem. I've always been a jack of all trades and master of none. I have tried a thousand million different things. I've lived in 15 different cities, and when I look at my bank account, I've hardly got two pennies to rub together. So I think being so flight of foot, what's going on with these crazy, like, what do you call these? There's a name for them. Not metaphors, cliches. What's going on with these crazy cliches today? I don't know, but I have a feeling that you're in for more because apparently they're all rolling around in my brain right now. But this person who says, yeah, being so flight of foot and fancy free has meant that I have nothing to show for it, right? It's gained me nothing. I've earned nothing. I have nothing. So those are the two perspectives that I want to address. And I want us to call into question the energy of consistency, the emotion of consistency. What consistency does for us, that's positive and what consistency does for us, that's negative. And then how do you regain a sense of consistency and upward build again in your life? And for those of you who never really, you know, had had a fun time with consistency, what does it really mean about you? Are you that person who will just never get ahead? Is there something wrong with you? Let's ask all of these questions in today's episode and try and figure out where you land on this kind of barometer of your feelings about consistency and maybe even turn some of our ideas and perceptions around. So in many respects, I have seemed. I'll start with my own personal story, right? In many respects, I've seemed like the most consistent person in the world, and I kind of have been right? I've lived in the same city now for 34, 35 years. Never moved away from the whole Southern California area. Been here my whole life. I met my husband back in high school, so now we have been together for, oh boy, dare I, dare I tell you, all my age, what is it, 31 or 32 years, and never lived further than an hour's drive from my parents, his parents. A lot of things that I've done have seemed very close to home, right? Dull even. Even when I went to college, I went to colleges around San Diego. I didn't leave. So did all of this consistency? Has all of this stick to itiveness made me a dull girl? I don't know. I don't think so. What it has done for me is it's laid a groundwork, it's laid a bedrock that I could build other far more interesting things on, right? It's having a sense of continuity in my city has made it so that I don't have to feel too out of sorts by moving and moving and moving, always relearning, always funneling my energies into, okay, make a new set of friends, make a new set of colleagues, make a new set of grocery stores that I shop at. Figure out, right, I haven't had to do that, kind of did it, and now it's forming this basis for everything else I do. Same thing with relationship. Having one long, deep, ongoing relationship doesn't mean you don't still work out relationship things all the time. And you do every new phase, every new decade that you enter. But it means that a lot of the explosive ups, downs, splitting apart, splitting assets, et cetera, was somehow mitigated. So these are things that are really great about consistency, right? They've really helped me. They've created security around me and I'm grateful and I feel blessed to have been able to have co created them. On the other hand, if that was all I had ever done, I would be a miserable mess because I would feel like I never went out into the world. I never did anything, built anything, made anything, saw anything, experienced anything. Consistency can create stability for you or it can create a jail for you. And a lot of us have had that experience. My long career created a jail. I felt boxed in. My long relationship created a jail. I couldn't leave and I couldn't grow anymore and I couldn't expand and I was stifled. So you see, even consistency has this upside and downside. It's how you are in it, how are you using it. Even things that are constant need to grow and change and evolve. And I think that's key. So if you have some of these long structures in your life, kind of like I've had, are they still being allowed to grow, change and evolve? If the answer is yes, you're probably not feeling boxed in and stymied and stuck. If the answer is no, then you just can't wait to get the hell out of Dodge. See, there's another cliche for you. Maybe this will be known as the cliche show. Now, let's contrast this and I have some good friends who are like this. They have never really settled in one place for more than a couple of years, maybe five years, seven years at the longest stretch. And they have been to multiple different training programs, multiple college programs, one field, another field, moving from, you know, sales to massage therapy, to, you know, doing other, you know, to growing things. I mean, just like, it's just, you know, to crafting to Etsying, to. It's just like, what are you doing now? What are you doing now? And it's true, you know, these friends of mine, they don't have a big company to show for. They don't have a long, long career. They don't have a corporate career, they don't have a 401k. The downside has been they've generally not built things to the point where they could make really good money off of them. And that's what we all end up hopefully eventually doing at some point in our lives. Because for us, that money is what's creating future security. So that's been sort of the downside for them. The upside, however, has taken place in their hearts. The upside has been I never felt stifled, I never felt unfree, I never felt in jail. When I was ready to pick up and move and change, I did. My heart is happy and light, and I've experienced a wondrous amount of things. When I look back on my life, I'm going to say I did everything I wanted to do. I checked so many buckets off of my list, I did everything I wanted to do, except that one long consistency thing. Didn't do that one. But I feel very content at what I've seen and felt and experimented with. Even all of my different relationships. Each one yielded me something, showed me something about myself, grew me. I think what I'm getting at here is another cliche. It's coming right at ya. All roads lead to Rome. Right? All roads lead to Rome. And the sense that living one way or the other is better should be called in question. Because the person who lives with incredible consistency may end up not having a light heart, may not end up feeling that they've really lived and checked everything off their list. They may have lots and lots of security, which has become a jail. On the other hand, the person who is fancy free is probably worried and concerned. I never made anything. I never made a big mark, a big splash. I never, you know, had that long big thing that made me feel proud. On the other hand, we know what the upsides are. So what I'm getting at is you might be one or you might be the other. Don't fret, let it go and don't judge. Recognize that consistency and inconsistency are energies that you can pour into your life, right? Like salt and pepper, you know, half teaspoon of this, half teaspoon of that, half teaspoon of this, half teaspoon of that. And it's flexible and it's varied and it's not all the same at any one time. You could actually start right now creating long term consistency. You just start, just get going. Or you could put it into the consistency that you've had and jump and fly and travel and get that RV and cruise around the US and do all those wild and weird things you always wanted to do. At any moment you have the power to take a new direction and to shake things up or to settle things down. And there's nothing inherently wrong with you for either of these paths that you've chosen. There is nothing inherently wrong with you. And there is no better way of being than the way you've been. And some of you are like nodding like, well, duh, that's self evident. Summer, some of you are saying, really? Are you sure about that? I don't know. That's not what I've been taught to believe. Well, let's play around. Maybe it's self evident and maybe it's not. Ask yourself right now, where have you been exceedingly consistent in your life? And has that consistency been there? Because it's been working for you and you enjoyed it and it felt good and you were growing in it? Or was that consistency there because you were afraid to leave it, afraid to lose it, afraid there would not be anything better clawing your way, staying, staying in, unhappier by the moment. Let's look at these things that have been consistent and why. How have they been consistent for you? Now, some of you guys maybe are writing this down. I know some of you listen to this show with a journal in hand, so good for you. Otherwise, if you're just sitting there driving, I'm sure a few little things have crossed your mind and you can think about them later. Now ask yourself the next question. Where have I been inconsistent in my life? And has that inconsistency been because I wanted to experience things, variety, change, I wanted to dabble. I wanted to have a taste of the whole world. Not just learn one dish very well, but taste the whole world? Was it inspired by adventure and freedom and hunger and joy? Or was my inconsistency inspired by feelings of self doubt? Nobody will want me for a long period. No one. There's no way I can settle. I have to keep moving. I'm a vagabond. I'm not good enough to excel at anything. What I'm asking you here to do is notice your motivation behind both kinds of living. Both kinds of living can have an incredible positive motivation. And that positive motivation yields great, great benefits for you. So next, next exercise that I want us to do, look at different areas of your life and ask yourself, think to yourself, consistent, inconsistent, positive, consistent, positive, inconsistent, or negative. Consistent, negative, inconsistent. Right? You've got four variables here. Let's look at your career right now. Let's look at your work. Consistent, inconsistent, positive, or negative. You may discover that over your life things changed, right? Maybe it started consistent and then it became inconsistent. Maybe it started inconsistent, became consistent. But where are you right now? Where are you right now? Little diversion here. Friend of mine was over and she and I were sitting out in the backyard talking before today's taping. And we're talking about what it feels like to be a woman in your mid to late 40s and how really. And my husband chimed in too. We had a nice little party in the backyard. We're talking about how you reach a certain point and sometimes it feels like you're going through your adolescence again, to use my husband's words, because you know, when you're younger, you're asking yourself, what do I want? What are my. What am I going to go for in life. Who am I going to become? Right? The future is wide open, and you wonder, who will I become in it? You haven't even decided on consistent or inconsistent. You're just there. You're just gonna see what happens next. Something happens in your mid to late 40s to a lot of us where we are having things kind of shift, right? We've been in our careers now for, you know, 20, 25 years. Our kids are getting older, if not graduated and off on their own. And it's almost like you stare down this barrel of the next 20, 30, 40 years, and you ask yourself, am I going to be doing the same thing that I've been doing for the last 20, 25 years? You're kind of right there in the middle of your career arc, you know, from 20 to 40 and then 40 to 60. And this is when we start to question and ask, do I want to stay consistent? Is it time to become inconsistent? Can I become inconsistent again? Is it allowed? And then we start to notice that we fear change, we want change, and we fear change. That youthful naivete, as my friend pointed out, isn't there like it used to be. And so we have to go searching for it, and instead of just having it like there in us. Youthful naivete, right? Meaning you don't know what you don't know, so you just go for it instead. We have to do something different. We're asked to do something different. We're asked to consciously create trust in our lives, whereas before it was just there because we didn't know any better, right? We had the whole world ahead of us, and now we recognize half of it is done. So I have to consciously create trust in the next half because that old feeling that I started with has kind of ebbed away. So when I consciously create trust, it's a whole different experience, a whole different animal. Means that when we make the choice to leave our job and start a new career, when you're 46, what you're saying is, I trust that this will work. I trust that I can have the same success or more than I had before. I trust that I am actually at the peak of my skills and ability, not at the decline, at the beginning of the decline of them. I trust that I know more about the world now than I ever have. And that's why I don't really care if I feel a little uncomfortable with some of the latest technology, because it makes up for it. It's a wash. In other words, we become a lot more conscious about these Choices we're making for, you know, the next half. And when we decide to leap and go for inconsistency, go for change, go for shaking things up, we do it now with a real sense of, I'm going to trust myself and leap. So that's why it's like being a young adult all over again. You know, as a young adult, we felt like we could try something. If it didn't work, we'd do something else. Try this. Didn't work. We had time to burn. We had time to burn in spades. Remember all those years you wasted working at the cafe or, you know, the movie theater? Didn't make, you know what, so what of it? You know? Sure, of course, I worked at the movie theater for four years. Big deal. And then I finally figured out, yeah, I want to do this, I want to do that. I settled into something. Now the idea of working at the, you know, the retail shop for four years at minimum wage, no way. You see, we have raised our bar, we've raised our expectations, and now when we make those leaps, it has to come from a place of deep and secure trust. And that's what throws us into this tension, I think, this sort of middle age tension. I want to be consistent, but I can't be consistent anymore or I've been inconsistent forever. How do I become consistent? It becomes a big question. Because the next 20, 30, 40 is resting on it. And what we've built in ourselves, the strength that we've built in ourselves is what allows us to either answer that question really successfully or not answer it and just let the next 20 years happen. Ramshackle. So the last few episodes, I've been giving you lessons from MI school. Examples of things that we talk about and we address in MI school. And while this particular episode is not that, because I'm really just zeroing in on a kind of a feeling, emotion state way of looking a point, an era. These are related to MI school concepts because when I say if you have to, if you've grown strong, if you've grown this trust in yourself, if you've grown trust in other people, trust in the universe, trust that life will carry you, then answering these questions about consistency and the what's next? Become infinitely easier. But if you have not laid that groundwork, if you have not built up that trust in yourself, if you have not built up that awareness and you're running on constant lack thinking, et cetera, well, then this is going to be a more difficult and painful part for you. That said, you can start Building at any time. I think this is why most of my students in mi school are in their 40s, right? 35 to 55. That's who you're probably going to meet. There's a few younger folk in me school. I don't want to say a few, that's more than a few, but they're the ones who've kind of woken up earlier and said, hey, I want to get a jump on this. I want to get a head start. I'm going to peel my head out from what everyone else is doing and think about this big deeper thing right now, you know, And I'm always like, hats off to you, man. You've got a 10 year jump. You got a 10 year jump. You're gonna go places. So if anything that I'm saying is striking you, you know, please, please go to my website, go to Flow dreaming dot com. And I am enrolling for MI school right now and I'm very willing to talk with you and, and see if this can make a difference for you. Likewise, my Diamond Mastermind, which is where I work with you one on one. So if any of these questions, if you've been listening to this podcast for a while now, you know, months or years, and you have not spoken to me yet, you maybe should, you really should, you not maybe should, you really should, you know, and my question is, what's stopping you at this point? Why, you know, why, why wouldn't you ask and look deeper and further? Don't be content with just this podcast. This podcast is meant to open your mind, open your thinking. But it is not, it is not the Diamond Mastermind. It is not private work. It is dabbling on the surface of the work that we truly do. So that said, go to the website, book a time with me. I'd love, love, love to talk with you. And I think we're going to go to a quick break. When we come back, we will, yes, indeed, do some flow dreaming. And also, if anybody wants to chime into this conversation, tell me where you're at. Are you in your mid-40s or 50s or late 30s? Are you hitting this moment where you're saying I've lived too consistently or I've lived too inconsistently? Help me reverse it. I need to get in balance and. Or I need to reclaim what I have done and love it and honor it and be happy with it? I would love to help you with that. So you can always give me a call at us 760-456-7277. So we'll be right back after this for more Flow Dreaming. While we're on break. Have you checked out MI School? In MI School, we travel together through a year, through everything that you are. You get to discover what drives you, how you're made, and how powerful you actually are. We play with intuition and Flow Dreaming and dozens of other techniques as you go through one of the most potent, powerful and pleasurable personal development experiences you've ever seen. We continually co create your future and I ask you to bring big goals to the table, things that you want to become inside yourself. And you'll reach these using the tools that you've probably never been exposed to before in your life. But you will be here in MI School. So if you're curious, go to flowdreaming.com and click on MI School. Set up a call and we'll help you see exactly what you can do with your life. And if you choose to come join me in MI School, then I look forward to spending the next year with you as we work together to create miracles.

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In case you missed it, the number to call to talk to me live is the US number 1764-567277. Flow Dreaming airs live on Tuesdays, so check flowdreaming.com for my code current live broadcast time. Again, reach me at 1-760-456-7277. Now let's get back to the show. Welcome back to Flow Dreaming. Just want to add a few little more words in here about the power of consistency. One thing I didn't mention earlier, consistency often implies follow through, right? Follow through is fantastic. Follow through is a kind of shorter term form of consistency. In fact, if you've been inconsistent in a lot of things in your life, you've jumped from one thing to the next to the next. You've been a dabbler. And that's the way your life has just, you know, been a beautiful, you know, patchwork quilt of experiences for you. You have followed through. You've just followed through for shorter terms, right? You follow through for shorter amounts. Follow through is critical no matter how you're living. Follow through means that instead of just conceiving an idea, conceiving something, you take it to the next point and then to the next point and to the next point. So people who stay doing that for long periods, of course become consistent. Those of you who follow through and follow through and follow through and after three or four or five months or three or four or five years, say, yeah, I've had enough of that. You've completed it, right? You've completed your circle. You've completed the run, if you will. And who is to say, who's to compare that your run was any better or worse than that other guy's run? You know, a marathoner and a sprinter is one better than the other? No sprinter is going to do a lot of sprints. Marathoner's going to do probably a few less marathons. They're both great, but they're different. They're different. Consistency does a lot of things for us in our lives, right? It makes people feel they can count on us, which is wonderful. Consistency allows us to kind of measure ourselves, grade ourselves, rate ourselves. Well, I started with a little apartment. Now I have a big mansion, right? But inconsistency does things for us as well. Inconsistency can make us very fluid and flowing and relaxed with change. That's really important in today's world because today we're being asked to move through change constantly. And those of you who are really good with inconsistency, you bend, you don't break, right? You're able to move. You're able to create that change. You're able to pick up that new technology. You're able to learn that new way of doing things and drop the old ways of doing things. That's what your gift of inconsistency has given to you. You flu it. You're now, you're. Now you're caught up. You're where things are at. You're not so worried about measuring the success, going from the apartment to the mansion for you. You're like, I'll go from the apartment to the mansion to the townhouse, to the condo to the apartment to the mansion to the townhouse. And whatever shows up next, I can comfortably fit myself into because I'm flexible. My inconsistency has allowed me to feel comfortable in just about any surrounding because that's what I've learned. See what I'm getting at? Pros and cons, ups and downs, right? The whole big. The whole big gist of this is really, don't judge yourself. The only thing you should be judging right now is how happy you are with what you've been doing. That's it. If you've been happy, keep doing it. Do more of it. If you've been unhappy, hey, let's start to learn a different way, figure out something else, okay? Speaking of figuring out something else, learning a different way, we have Jessica on hold from Massachusetts. Hey, Jessica.

Hi. How are you?

I'm wonderful. It's Nice to talk with you. Have we talked before?

No, I've only been. I started listening to your podcast like less than a month ago because I have a new job and it's like a one hour, 20 minute drive one way.

Yes.

Yeah. But the concept of flow dreaming just kind of seems relevant to the new job that I have and to, like, where I've been taking my life. So I just started tuning into it. It's been fun so far.

Oh, that's cool. That's cool. I should, I should ask everybody. I should do like a poll. You know, how many people listen while they're driving? How many people listen versus, you know, at all these different places? I'm curious. Sounds like you might be driving right now. Are you on your way to work?

I'm on my way to. I'm on my way home from work.

Oh, excellent. Well, what's on your mind?

So I just thought that the topic was interesting because like I said, flow dreaming felt like it was sort of relevant to where I'm at right now. But this feels. This conversation feels especially relevant because. Well, I'm only 31, but I started working with kids when I was like 14, and I've done nothing but social work and teaching.

Yeah.

Since I was 14, if you can believe that. And yeah. And I went to school for it and I kind of felt like, oh, God, am I going to keep doing this? Like, you know, I'm only 22, 23, and I've already kind of like sold myself to this. But I kept at it. And yeah, I, like, I just, I. Last year I was so miserable. I had the classroom from hell and I said, like, no more of this. Like, no more. And I told my principal at the end of the year that I wasn't coming back. I went back to school full time, started environmental science, and my job is actually a service position with AmeriCorps. I'm like, totally starting from scratch. I'm doing a service position with AmeriCorps. And like, already in the month that I'm there, I feel like, oh, my God, this is like a huge deal. This is a breakthrough. This is amazing. This is gonna all this incredible stuff and it's like really exciting. And I felt like it was so relevant to what you're talking about.

Yeah. So basically you realize that you got yourself in that box of consistency and you made the change and said, okay, I'm going to go. I'm going to be inconsistent for a while and I'm going to pray and I'm going To hope. And I'm going to actually get into that trust. And you noticed it was probably a lot harder to make that choice than it was when you were 14, when you were going into, you know, social work in the first place.

Probably.

Yeah, Yeah. I mean, we have more hanging on it, right? We've got, you know, our sense of self, our sense of, you know, paying the bills and the other people that we're responsible for. Uh huh, huh. So it's kind of like the same lesson, but hyped up on steroids. That's how I feel. When you have to make these choices at this age or even, like you said, at 31, because you've been doing it a long time, right? Imagine doing it at 41 or 51.

Well, and that was the thing. Like, I felt like I was prematurely middle aged. Like I was having a crisis. It was weird. It was weird. Yeah, yeah.

God, that's a great idea, actually, for a show topic. You know, are you having your middle aged crisis at 30? Totally.

People are.

Yeah. It's very overlooked. And I remember actually going through something when I was about 30, 31, 32 as well. And nobody talked about it. Everybody thought, what, you know, what are you talking about? That you're not supposed to feel like that till you're like, 40. I'm like, well, I hit the early mark here, folks, so. Yeah. Interesting. All right, Jessica, Well, I love that you're doing your flow dreaming. Have you tried flow dreaming at all yet? Do you practice it?

I mean, I've listened to the podcast and I, you know, hear the little flow dreams at the end and I kind of do them in my car, but I definitely want to try.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely do. It sounds like you're already, you've already made that career transition, so that's good. Otherwise I'd say go get a career transition flow dream. I have them for you, but keep up the good work. You're. You're. Keep up the good work. Sounds like you're on the right track. Thank you. All right, awesome. Thanks for your call. Take care. Bye. I'd have kept her a little bit longer, but I was having a bit of a hard time hearing her in the car. I hope you guys could hear everything she was saying. I think I may have been coming out her car speakers, so we were hearing a little bit of all kinds of stuff. What do you guys think about that? You know, that would be a great topic. Speaking of, I do have a new podcast that will be coming out soon, and I'm Just gonna drop a little hint of it right now, tentatively. I'm calling it damn good advice. And it might be good advice or it might not be good advice, but it will be damn advice and it's gonna be very playful. We are gonna take on topics ideas that sometimes aren't as playful but look at them in a more light hearted way. Kind of laugh as we look deeper and probably not centered as much on flow, dreaming or our way of looking at the world co creation and manifesting. I want to step away and kind of branch out and let myself explore some other things. So keep your eyes peeled for that. I would like to have it going within about a month, maybe more or less. We will see when it happens. But what it does, you guys know I'll be talking all about it. So you'll want to look for that one damn good advice. And that one will not be a call in show. It will just be little pre taped snippets kind of like your traditional podcast, the ones that you're used to already. So keep your eyes out for that. Okay, let's see, where are we at right now? Oh, we're doing good. We've got plenty of time. Let's keep going then. With some of these thoughts about being inconsistent or consistent, I feel like I've kind of hit the consistent side a little bit more. I'd like to speak into the inconsistent side because I feel that, you know, the major problem with people who have too much consistency is they basically jail themselves. And you guys know who you are because you feel that way. The people who are inconsistent, you don't feel you've jailed yourselves. You have more a sense of I did all the wrong things, I made all the wrong moves, I was just stupid, I made all the wrong mistakes. Right? You're not in jail, you're in a jail of your circumstances. You know, the marriage or the house or the job or whatever you got yourself into, can't get out of. Where you've jailed yourself is in your own internalized feelings of not being good enough, not being up to par, not being like everyone else. That's your jail, it's an internal jail and it's where you start to doubt yourself. Maybe I've been inconsistent just because I've not been good enough. Maybe I'm not smart enough, maybe I don't have any carry through. Maybe my procrastination has gotten in the way, or maybe my ADHD has gotten in the way, or maybe my inability to focus and stick with things. Maybe all that has Gotten in the way. Maybe I've lost out. I've lost out. And if this is you, when I'm saying it right now, you're like, oh, my God, that's me. That's how I feel. You will know if it's you because you'll have an emotional response to this. So again, let's not cry over spilt milk here. And let's stop looking at this like you lost out. You haven't lost out. There are millions of people right now who are jealous of you. They are. They're jealous of you. They're jealous of your position. All those consistent people felt like they handcuffed themselves early on, whereas you got to go out and play cartwheels and do things and. Yeah, I know. Highs and lows. There's definitely going to be highs and lows. You know, dramas and breakups and firings and movings and losing businesses and making lots of money and having great things happen and marriages and all over the place. All over the place. But you see, to the person who's handcuffed themselves, you represent freedom like you represent freedom. And we need you. We need to see you because you remind us, well, life doesn't collapse if you have freedom. I won't fall apart if I have freedom. What? What if instead, what if the two of us could get together and create this beautiful balance right in between? And that's where I want to take the rest of this podcast, right, the rest of this show, as I often do, Right, because that's a flow principle. It's a principle of perfect balance, of yin and yang, of light and dark, of up and down, of backwards and forwards, of in and out, the duality of our universe, physical and non physical. For me, the balance between consistency and inconsistency is something that can be very difficult to put your thumb on. You know, it just kind of slides out from underneath you every time you try and pin it down. Ooh, another cliche for you. But it can be done, especially if you work to create consistency in the areas where you really want it and need it, and plenty of inconsistency in the areas where you need your freedom. Okay, now. Now we're really starting to plan and plan well. And this, I think, is also what comes into question so greatly in the second half of our lives when we are now thoughtfully planning and cultivating, as opposed to the beginning when we were just saying, well, I'm gonna try this. We'll see. So consistency in the areas that are meaningful to you. Well, for most of Us starts with a bank account, right? I like to have savings. I like to have a rainy day fund. I like to have the inconsistency, for example, the freedom that having savings gives to me. Consistency can also mean I want to be with somebody I love and I want to come home to them and I want to rely on them, and I want to know that they're there for me. And I want to grow my Thanksgiving dinners around this family that I've put together. This consistency based on love, partnership. Those are really great ways to create consistency. But there's also great ways to have inconsistency in your life. And the inconsistency is what gives you your sense of freedom, growth, unrestricted potential places you can still go, right. Mountains you can still climb. So these areas of inconsistency are generally more personal and they're generally more, how do I say, spiritually inclined. So your inconsistency may be. I'm 57 and I'm learning to paint for the first time in my life. Right. I'm 42, and for the first time ever, I have decided to train for a triathlon. I'm going to volunteer and go into this field of, speaking of social work. I'm going to work with, you know, I'm going to be a big brother, big sister to autistic kids, and it's just going to fill something. I want to know what it's like to be a volunteer. Now, you may not stay with any of these things, but you see, you're breaking new ground. You're trying things that fill you up, turn you on, light you up. If you can pack your life with enough things like that, then you feel like everything is always new, everything is always different. Yet I have that consistency where I need it so that I can build on top of. And I think that's the greatest message that I've learned from my own life. I was fortunate to have built things over the long term, built a relationship. And I think that being in my community also helped me to a great degree. I didn't know it at the time, but now I do because I know a lot of people in this town. And having those two beds of consistency allowed me to branch out and explore and be free in all these other fields and ways. As many of you know, I have changed careers multiple times, at least three, four times. And I'm only 47. But I keep giving myself this freedom because of what I've already built. And what I've already built is now starting to give me more and more ability to have more freedom like this. So I'm getting into balance. Really, really, really hope you are too. So as always, I hope this was a thought provoking one. Sometimes, you know, they're more instructional. I'll go through my list, you know, the 10 things. And sometimes it's more like, let's just look at you. Let's just stop for a second, see where you're at, what's really going on. Let's. Let's look through a different lens. I love looking through lenses, you know, like those funny mirrors at the fair. Some make you look, you know, really short and wide and other ones make you like a big, you know, green. Lenses like that let you see something through a different viewpoint. And that different viewpoint can shed all kinds of new understandings into you and into your life. Okay, so I promised that we're going to do a bit of flow. Let's go ahead and jump in and do that bit of flow together. If you are new to flow dreaming, this is not meditation. I want you to daydream with me. I want you to feel emotional with me. I want you to let go and allow yourself to pretend, really pretend. And then feel that there is a roaring river of purity, of goodness, of right direction. And it races right down the center stripe of your life. And everything else you do, you wander on and off of it and you dilly dally over here and there. But ultimately this central good, pure, unrestricted flow is right there in the heart of it all. And if you can align to that, you are bringing yourself back to center. You are bringing yourself back to source, self, to the real you. You are releasing tension, releasing stress, releasing self doubt, releasing feeling jailed, releasing all the shoulds and getting right back into that one single gorgeous path where there is nothing in your way. That is what flow is. That's flow. So close your eyes with me right now. Let's start to relax and release, letting go. Take a deep breath in and exhale. Let your shoulders drop, Wiggle your jaw, yawn if you like, release and relax your brow and imagine that roaring river of goodness, beautiful river of light. Well being, love, trust, purity. Here you are. You are flowing, released, Feeling the current take you forward. This current is all about change. Change in your life. Minute by minute, things flow in and things flow out. And things flow in and things flow out, consistent and inconsistent. Following through and reinventing. Following through and reinventing in the circle. The cycle goes on and on and on. Doesn't end, continues. Ever refreshing itself, ever refreshing you. And this idea that you have this idea that you have, that you reach some finale, some end point. You let go of that. You let go. You are refreshed, you are refreshing. You are new. And you are consistent and old.

Filled.

With knowledge and steadfastness. You are both simultaneously new and old, structured and unstructured, free and secure. And anything right now in your life that feels like it's gotten pressured by this or restricted by this or has upset you, feeling out of balance, you now set back into balance again. You let it be free. You let it flow if it needs to, or you bring it back, button it down, and make it something secure and consistent if you need to do that. You are in perfect alignment, perfect balance. And this is such a relief, such a relief in your heart. You feel good and you feel balanced. And now you hold that feeling even now you find yourself coming back, returning from flow and opening your eyes. There you go. There is a feeling right there of being in perfect balance, right? Letting some things move and wiggle free and letting other things settle in and become deeper. That is the beauty of consistency, not the grind of consistency. And that is the beauty of inconsistency, not the loss of inconsistency. So I really hope this hour I've helped to correct some things in your head, correct some thoughts in your head, right? Bring you back into a greater state of love for yourself, greater sense of self acceptance, maybe freed you a little bit to pursue and go next and become whatever you are next. That's my aim and that is my goal. And for any of you who loved today's topic, I will be putting up with the topic, a suggested flow drain that you can use. And if you like flow dreaming, you can find a whole shop full of them at my website, flow dreaming.com, where I talk about a lot of different subjects. And the one that I'm thinking of right now is called Wondrous change and Transition. It allows those of you who are too consistent to kind of shift in the other direction. So that's my last thought that I throw out to you guys. I love you all and I will see you all again next week for another amazing episode of Flow Dreaming.

Foreign.

Hey everyone, thanks for listening today. One request before you go. Please rate this podcast either in itunes or tunein.com or wherever you listen to it. It'll only take you a minute to do, but your rating there is the number one way that other people discover this show. And the more ratings, the more people who will find and get turned on to Flow Dreaming while you're there. You might also want to download my free Flow Dreaming podcast app. With this app, you can listen to the show anywhere you want on your mobile device, as well as search through listings of all of my episodes and bookmark your favorites. And if you want to listen to Flow Dreams actual Flow Dreams on your phone, there's even another app. It's my Player app and it will let you browse and sample Flow Dreams from the shop. There is even an oracle inside of that app to help you see and discover what you need to know most or what Flow Dream would be best for you in your life. Right now. You can find these apps on itunes, or in Google, or your Amazon App Store. And again, thank you so, so so so much for giving back. Love you. Bye Bye.