Jocko Underground: Is Comparison Really The Thief Of Joy? |

This is the Jocko Underground podcast number 102, sitting with Echo Charles. Echo Charles.

Yes.

I have two quotes for you. Equivalent quotes, I guess. Same thing. One of them is, comparison is the thief of joy. That's Teddy Roosevelt. The other one, comparison is the death of joy, Mark Twain. Mark Twain's 20 years older, so giving him the credit. But.

Do I agree with that?

There's dichotomy. Hate to say it, sure. Because, listen, competition's a good thing.

Yeah, right?

Yeah, competition's a good thing. You and I, competitive, right? We train Jiu Jitsu. Yeah, right. If you catch me, I want to catch you. Right? In Jiu Jitsu, if you are able to beat me or if I'm able to beat you, you want to beat me, right? It's competitive. We just don't go there and, like, hug it out. You know what I mean?

No, we don't.

We're trying to fight.

That's competition. Makes me work harder. Makes you work harder, maybe. But, you know, when you're. Let me ask you this. When you're doing a metcon, do you ever think during the metcon that you're gonna be training with me?

Yes.

Check. See? You see what I'm saying? Yes, I do. You push yourself a little more. I do the same thing. Not so much about you, but about some other people.

Thank you for that honesty on that one.

Bro.

I've seen some comments, take that stuff real seriously. When I. When I. No, some people. Some people know I'm kidding.

Yeah.

But some people think I'm like, you know. You know, jocko talks about being humble, but he just rags on Echo. And I'm like, dude, you need to watch the video, cuz we're laughing.

There's a psychological game within the game.

What's the. What is that?

It's an expression. Like, there's more to it than just you're just razzing me and I'm just getting razzed, you know, there's a lot more.

There's more going on there.

There's. Oh, big time.

Okay. All right.

See, See, that's a tactic, too, by the way.

So we're pushing harder because we compare with each other.

But that being said, I do understand where this comment comes from for sure, probably because even though the. The competitive thing, and you know, in the SEAL teams, everything's competitive. Like, it doesn't matter if you're, like, doing a beach run, you're competing, you're shooting, you're competing. Everything that you're doing, you're Competing? Yeah. And it's good. It's healthy 90% of the time. But in life, I think it's actually not healthy. I would say, like, maybe 50% of the time, maybe it's just an even split. Sometimes this comparison, this competition, can bring out the worst in us. It can bring. Make people cheat. It can prevent us from being happy.

Your buddy gets a nice new car.

How does that make you feel?

Let's face it, there's some people that when their buddy gets a nice new car, they're kind of jealous and pissed.

That was one of my favorite stories about stoner. I bought a house in a cool location that was by our surf spots. Yeah.

Hell, yeah.

And when he. I texted him to meet me there, like, I didn't say anything about it because I didn't want to jinx it. You know what I mean?

Yeah.

Is that superstitious?

Yes.

Yeah. So I was being superstitious, but I didn't want to jinx it and tell him, bro, I got us a spot. Like, I got a spot. Like, we're gonna be set for surfing. And so finally I got the keys.

That's when you know, right?

And I texted him, I said, hey, come see the new house. And he's like, send the address. So I sent the address, and he was like, oh, shit. And so I got there, and I'm waiting for. He comes up the stairs, and he walks, and he goes, dude, we are set.

It wasn't even his house, bro. But he knew we were set. You know what I'm saying? He knew he's never gonna have to, like, not have a surfboard on location and wetsuit and shower and just be good to hook. But I had some other friends came over, and what they pointed out was the negatives of this house. Like, oh, you worry about that? And, like, you got hating.

And it's just a bummer. You know what I mean? So if you ever feel that way, it's a little red flag you got to watch out for, and. And it can build up that resentment, and that resentment is just terrible for you. And it's this. It's this Cain and Abel story, right? It's the Cain and Abel story. Both Cain and Abel made sacrifices to God, and for whatever reason. Unclear. God didn't appreciate Cain's gift as much as he appreciated Abel's sacrifice or gift. Right? Just for whatever reason. Not even. It's not in the Bible. It's not clear why.

But Cain was furious about this, and he killed his own brother.

He killed his own Brother.

Because his brother got praise. That's why he killed him. So this happens with people. You know, I worked harder than that person worked or, you know, I made the sacrifices. You know, why does he get the recognition? Why does he get the money? Why is he. That this stuff happens.

And it's very disturbing.

So sometimes in some cases, comparison and competition can drive resentment and negativity. And those are absolutely, yes, terrible things.

So don't be that person. You should be happy when other people win, should be happy for them, should be stoked. And in fact, hopefully you reach a point where when other people win, you get joy out of it. Makes you feel better than if you won yourself. You'll get to seal that with. You get to feel that with your kids.

Yeah.

You know, when your kids are doing well, you'll be more happy than if you did well. Like, you see your kid, something as simple as you see your kid catch a good wave. Yep. And you, you're more happy, more stoked when they catch a good wave than when you catch a good wave or they catch it good. They catch like a heel hook on a fool. You know what I mean? And it's like, yo, got that heel hook. Yeah. So you. That's how you should feel when other people. When your friends, the people around you, they win. What it should feel like is your comparison should be like, stoke. I'm glad they got that instead of hatred and resentment and jealousy. So be. Be careful of comparison. That's my overall assessment here. I'm not going to go that it's the death of joy or it's the thief of joy. It can bring joy. Me. It can also bring resentment and frustration and hatred. So just be careful with these things. Be careful. And if that's what it does to you, if you can't sleep at night because you're pissed off that Echo got a freaking new car and you think you deserve. If that's where you're at, man, check yourself. You're just insecure. Your ego is insecure. You got issues.

Yet? A lot or. It was kind of told to me that that, like, indicates a lack of gratitude. Right. So the. Because, like, if you get a new car.

At the very minimum, it shouldn't make me feel anything. At the minimum. If I like you, then, yeah, I should be happy for you, ideally. Right. But if I have no gratitude, you getting the new car isn't you getting the new car. It's me not getting a new car. See, I'm saying. So it's like I'm Looking at it backwards in a way.

Wait, if you have gratitude.

Yeah. I'm like, okay, I'm thankful for what I have. What you have has no bearing on me, except for you're my friend. So you're happy. I'm happy you're happy because I like you and you're my friend. That's. That's kind of the baseline. But to someone who lacks gratitude, meaning, like, I am not thankful for what I have or whatever. Just the baseline or whatever. It's not. It doesn't land on you like they got a car and it's some other person getting a car. It's you almost like you got your car taken away. Almost kind of a. Kind of a thing. But it's you not getting a car.

That's how I'm saying. That's how jacked up human beings can be. Yes. Think about how jacked up that is.

Yeah.

You're so jacked up that one of your friends gets a new car and you get pissed about. And you're mad. Even if your enemy gets a new car.

Yeah.

You should be like, dude, good job.

It can get so bad. You can literally get a new car for free. And your neighbor buys a new car nicer than yours. By your own opinion, not his. Your own opinion and your mad. That's how deep it can go.

See what I'm saying?

And you know they have an expression for. Right. Keeping up with the Joneses. Yeah, I was gonna say Kardashians, but, you know, that's another thing. Actually, it's the same thing. Same thing. That's where the name came from. Keeping up with the Joneses, right? It's like, oh, yeah, I have my new house. I'm so happy. I got my car, got my kids. And then my neighbor gets, like, a bigger house and a bigger car. Oh, my car sucks all of a sudden. You know, it's like a weird psychological phenomenon.

Yeah.

Probably can. It can be the thief of joy, straight up.

You know what else is funny is when some people. When it doesn't bother you and Echo rolls in. In his new Cadillac. And I was like, oh, cool. Nice car. But they're not mad. You're mad. Because I'm not jealous.

That's like, next level. That's next level, dude, the double.

When I didn't even ask you how much it costs. Right? Brutal. And you're like. You're like, dude, I paid cash for this thing. And I'm like, oh, that's cool. You're trying to get me to. So that is a little excerpt of what we are doing on the Jocko Underground podcast. So if you want to continue to listen.

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