Allowing Your Feminine Gifts to Flourish with Lisa Schrader

Welcome to Mama Goddess. I'm your host, Alexandra J. Johnson. This podcast is all about rocking your goddess life, creating vibrant health and celebrating motherhood and family life. It's about living an authentically awesome life. Let's have. Welcome. I'm Alexandra J. Johnson and today we have a delicious guest, Lisa Schrader. And Lisa is the founder of Awakening Shakti. She is also a sacred sexuality workshop leader, an author, a speaker and a coach. And I love Lisa. Like every time I talk to Lisa or I think about Lisa, I just naturally sink into my divine feminine goddess. So I am thrilled to be talking with her today. And welcome, welcome, Lisa.

Thank you, sweetheart. I love talking to you too. It's just so much fun. Thank you for inviting me back. I'm sure we'll be juicy and fabulous as always.

As always. And I have your book. I, I don't think I've done. I've shared that in a video yet in one of ours, I have. She's the author of this book, which.

Is very sexy book.

Super sexy.

Woo.

Yummy. So we are obviously going to be talking about sexuality, sensuality, women, all of that yumminess. And I would love to start off with self love and self care. Like what does self love mean to you and self care and why is it so important for women?

I love that question, that topic, you know, and I just had this flashback of, you know, being in my 20s and working as an account manager in the Silicon Valley and, you know, working mega hours and being totally stressed out. And I used to go to Jazzercise, you know, and I'd like peel into Jazzercise, you know, after a super long day and I'd be like, I gotta be skinny, I gotta be fit. You know, it's so interesting how our concepts of self care change. You know, when you asked that question, I thought, wow, like I thought going to my exercise class at the end of a crazy workday was being self loving and self care and for sure, yeah, that's. Thank goodness. At least I was getting to jazzercise classes. And now my life. Not that I don't go through periods where I'm very busy or very productive. I'm just coming off a wave of that where I've been working a lot. But for me, you know, we got to remember that our feminine is this, you know, it's the ebb and the flow, right? It's the, it's, it's our lunar nature where we get really, really full. We, you know, we're waxing, waxing, waxing and Then we're waning, waning, waning, waning, waning. Right. And for me at least it's, it's really paying attention to what that rhythm is. You know, what, what is that rhythm for each of us? And I think that that obviously shifts at different stages of our life. New moms, you know, it's a self. What, what does self care and self love look like? You know, as a new mom? What's it look like when you've got kids that are busy in school and you're maybe being a soccer mom? You know, if you're a mother, same and same in your career, you know, as a entrepreneur now, there's times in my, my business where it's just really, really a push and, and then there's the time after that that it's the, you know, the relaxing, the letting go time and finding those rhythms, I think, and honoring them is such an important part of loving ourselves as, as women. And I will say that, you know, there's a cultural conspiracy to keep us away from that. Right? It's like this productivity, you know, and this more masculine, get it done, stay focused. You know, I even find, you know, sometimes I'm laying in the sun in the middle of the day or, you know, I confess, my beloved came over for coffee this morning and we walked to town and we had coffee and we came home and we made love. And I'm like, wow, you know, here we are like in the middle of the week, you know, making love at my favorite time, which is like 10:30 or 11, you know, and luckily I have the kind of life where I can really justify that. You know, I talk about this and I teach about it and sexuality and passion and loving are really important to me. And so, you know, I can't actually prioritize that. But, you know, if you had told me that in my 20s when I was being a high tech marketing executive that, you know, I would have, I would have if from my masculine mindset I would have been like, well, that is, you know, I would have had all kinds of judgments about that not being productive or being lazy or being like, well, that's really an anomaly. And so, you know, whatever it is, for those of you that are listening, you know, it depending on life cycle, there's so many variables. But I would say, you know, really look at if you were really loving yourself and you were really honoring your own rhythm, what would that look like? You know, my rhythm is that I don't work, I don't see clients, I don't Talk to clients. I don't do interviews like this first thing in the morning. It's just not my time. And so, you know, that time pretty much from when I wake up until about 10am for me is my sacred time, you know, which might mean praying or meditating or doing yoga, doing something physical, going for a walk, making love to my, you know, my man, or just being. Or putzing around with no agenda, you know, and that makes me feel sane and that makes me feel like I'm really loving myself. I'm honoring what my rhythm is. How are you doing it, Alexandra? With a new Ish. Well, he's not. Harrison's not so newish anymore.

Yeah, 18 months still feels pretty new. Yeah, I mean, I think I love that you're talking about the rhythms of finding our own rhythms. And I've been really noticing this more with my cycle. I just recently got my cycle back after not having it through pregnancy, you know, pregnancy. And then I just got it back last month. So it's over two years. And it's been really great to get it back because I'm noticing my rhythms in a whole different way. Like, I used to be super. I was an athlete. So I was. You just didn't have time for. I mean, there wasn't like a spaciousness. Oh, I'm feeling like this in my cycle. I don't think I'm gonna go to the game, you know.

Right. Stick a tampon in it and perform.

So it's been very beautiful to like, oh, wow. There is different seasons and different rhythms in each month.

Yes.

So I've been noticing that. Which is. I'm really digging that. Which like you said, you know, five, 10 years ago, I would have been, what the hell are you talking about? Like, whatever, I got shit to do. So that's been very interesting. And as a new mom, you know, sometimes you have, depending on nap times, three hours during the day, and that's all you have, you know, where you're not caring for your child, where you have that space. So I found that that's crucial for me to do. Totally what nourishes me. Like if that means just going for a walk, taking a nap, like that is vital to my happiness.

Yeah, that's great. So self care for you is about rest. Yes. One aspect of it and one of the things that I teach the women in my initiation program, my Shakti initiation program, when we begin, it's all about what's the foundation for this work that we're going to do together. So we really Start with personal foundation. And one of the practices that. That I offer is the idea of 10 daily habits. And it doesn't have to be 10, but it's. For me, it's really important to look at what are those habits. Right. Those good practices that, you know, ideally are daily. Of course, they're not always. I don't hit all 10 daily, but it's always something I come back to. I don't care how off I get or how busy I get. You know, there's a certain point, and I have to say, the older, hopefully a little bit wiser that I get, the shorter the time is between when I leave it and I come back. And for me, it's number one. One of them for me is rest, which is, of course, about getting enough sleep at night, but it's also about stopping when I'm tired or, you know, taking a nap in the middle of the day or finding that rhythm where I have enough quiet time. There's also meditation in there and a bunch of things about how I eat and staying hydrated. And, you know, those kinds of foundational practices are just so important for us. You know, that's what fills the well so that we have overflow to give. And so many women, particularly these days, you know, they're. They just are. They just keep pulling, trying to pull water out of that well. Right. It's not an abundance that they're giving, but they're tapping themselves out. You know, they're stressed out and they're. They're pulling from unsustainable sources. And we can't. We know we can't do that indefinitely without it being a problem for us.

Do you think that there's, like, this thing in our culture with women feeling guilty for taking time for themselves? You know, because I have so many friends who are mothers and not mothers, just women in general who, if you're not, like, super productive or you're, you know, like you're not celebrated to have a morning like you had today, like, there's part of you that'd be like, oh, that's cool. That's for her. Whatever. I had stuff to do. I was right. I was making a movie.

Yeah.

So it's like, oh, that's indulgent of her to do that, or it must be nice for her, because I can't. And then if they actually do take the time, there's that guilt or what. What's going on with that?

It's a really good question, you know, and. And I think that the. The place to look at it is that part in our own psyche, you know, and for me, sometimes it's helpful because I have a very strong masculine side of me. You know, I've been running my own business for a long time, and, man, especially lately, I've just moved and, you know, I just. It's just been like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. You know, get it done and organizing it. You know, I've just been on. And now on the other side of it, I'm like, whoosh, you know, finding more my feminine flow again. But. And, you know, these aspects of ourselves are useful, but when we're always on, particularly, let's just call it with that more masculine driving, product producing, performing, achieving, improving, you know, when we're always in that mode, we're missing out on other aspects of, I would say, our power. In my work, I would call it our shakti. And our shakti, our feminine power, has a different quality than our masculine. And again, we're in a culture that for so long now has been dominated by the masculine paradigm that it's just useful to notice when that voice comes in. You know, if you hear a sister who's had the morning off, if you notice inside of your own mind, like, well, nice for her, jeez, I mean, I got more stuff to do. I got to get stuff done. You know, the beginning of starting to shift things in our lives is to notice that voice. Like, wow, that's interesting. Is that actually true? You know, and what part of me is feeling whatever I'm feeling about that, like, to be more curious about it, not that it's wrong, but just curious about that, you know, And. And as we become curious and as we start to really fund or invest in our shakti and our feminine, and we start to see a different way of making things happen. Right? So, like, what I talk about a lot is as. And what I experience in my life, the more that I balance whatever that looks like. But, you know, find my. Find my rhythm and come into my feminine power. It's infinitely more powerful than my masculine really. You know, especially sexually. You know, women. Women are known to have this exhaustible sexual potency that's much greater than that of a man. Right, but we haven't tapped into that yet, most of us. Right. But as we start to feel that and feel that shakti, you know, that orgasmic flow in our life, and we start to. To allow that to attract things to us, it's a very different model. Right. What I'm noticing is that very often, if I can. If I can Stop. And if I can come back into. Okay, what do I energetically really want to have happen here? Right. And I can, you know what I would say would be activate my shakti and, and imagine that whatever I'm wanting is coming to me. Alexandra. It blows my mind. I mean, it blows my mind over and over again. An hour later, the phone rings and somebody's like, I have a da da, da da. I was wondering if you wanted it. You know, I'm like, that's so weird. Yes. You know, it just. It's that feeling of synchronicity starting to happen. More opportunities coming, more. I like to say it's like the doors are opening. And the doors are opening, and the doors are opening. But if we're, if we're so used to making it happen all the time and we have an identity about that. Yeah, right. Like I have an identity. Some level of like, you know, I'm the, I'm the one who's busy. I'm the one who makes stuff happen. You know, I make shit happen in my life and da da, da, da, da da. You know, there's nothing wrong with that. And if that's working great, like if you're happy. What I see is a lot of women, myself included, after a certain period of that, you know, we get bitchy, we get brittle. You know, we're feeling like, why am I the one who always has to do everything around here? People feel burdened and then, and then, you know, it's. That's. We become very unattractive. Yeah. And I don't mean like not physically, although I think that has something to do with it. But meaning, like we stop attracting and when we balance and we bring, you know, this has to do with our self care and our sensuality and our sexuality and we start to tap into. It's like, wow, I have a kind of post potency and power. It's not unlike, you know, the womb energy, Right. You know, here we have this infinite capacity to create life right here in our bodies, right? And we have, you know, this womb and these eggs that are calling the sperm to us, right. They're not just sitting around la di, la di, right. There's actually a magnetic. And we don't know that. Right.

Yeah.

But when we can start to feel that, that magnetic and you know, it's all kinds of aspects of our divine feminine energy, then yeah, yes, shit still gets done and you still can perform and it. Things can still happen, but you're doing it from a place of greater joy, greater passion. A greater sensuality. Life becomes more beautiful and easier. And people want to be with you, and people want to give to you. I mean, I've got so much ridiculous love in my life. I'm just so blessed. I'm so blessed. Better it gets, the better it gets. Totally.

And I think that I love that you're just sharing that, because, I mean, there's so many things I love about that. That magnetic power. And there's, like, for me, as you were talking about it, there's a sense of ease and mystery, magic and fun.

Yeah, I love that. Ease, mystery, magic and fun.

Yeah, that's great to have that, like, you know, because every time that I get in that space where I have those, you know, you feel it. You're like, oh, I'm. You know, it's just like a playful, childlike, divine feminine mojo that feels really good. And then it's almost like it's too easy, maybe, right?

Because. And then that goes back to this paradigm of, like, we have to work hard, right? We have to make things happen. And, you know, and. And I'm not saying that we don't have times like that. I mean, I'm in a very relaxed place right now because I just climbed a mountain, you know, Like, I just got credentialed. I'm a professional certified coach now through the icf. That was a huge process, you know, and I moved and, you know, I was not in my relaxed feminine flow too much in the last couple of weeks, but I knew that was a temporary. Like, I gotta pour on that masculine energy. So, you know, for people that are listening again, like, there's gonna be times in your life where it's like, I don't have a luxury maybe, of being with that. But I would say even for those women, you know, even in those times where we're having to pour on the energy or really having to perform or achieve something or we have a lot that we want to get done, we can keep remembering to weave in. You know, we weave in. Tantra means weaving. And I think at any point, and particularly for us as women, when we're not weaving in, you know, maybe that just looks like in the midst of craziness in life, you know, you. You take a little time out, you go smell the roses, you do whatever, you know, it looks like for you to come back in, you can keep weaving that in. And the more we do that, the more sustainable energy that we have, right? The more that the shakti flows, that's really the ticket, you know, and to notice like you were talking about in your cycle, even in the month, there's going to be times where, you know, you're going to have. You're going to be very social and connected to other women, and you're going to want to connect, right? And then there's that time, typically before we bleed, where it's, you know, we're really. We're bitchy a lot of times, right? We're PMSing. But it's because we're starting to set boundaries. We're going through a different part of our cycle. And then when we actually start bleeding, that is tends to be a time, you know, when the veil is very thin, right, that there's that, you know, luminosity that we have, where we're getting, you know, hopefully downloads information. Just recently heard that women in Fiji, you know, have. Have their red tent time and that they actually get time off to be in their moon, their moon time. Like, it's, it's. It's paid leave for women and that, you know, in the tribal cultures, the women who were in their bleeding time, you know, the male elders of the tribe would slip notes under the tent, literally, with the big questions for the tribe, like, what should we do about this or that? And it was the women who were bleeding that could access the wisdom, that could access the divine guidance, if you will. So, like, what would it look like? You know, whether. And I'm not bleeding anymore. Well, haven't for a few months. I'm very perimenopausal, menopausal right now. So, you know, certainly if you're still bleeding, it's a really obvious. It's an obvious time. But even for those of us that are not bleeding anymore, to just notice we're still in a rhythm every month, you know, and I know some women, when they don't have their own moon cycle, they. They watch the cycle of the moon. And so on the new moon or the full moon, that might be your time to really go within. But, you know, as we. As we honor those cycles, as we weave that in, you know, and we become curious about that voice, like, you're talking about, and our own programming about how we. We disassociate from the feminine. Right? I mean, and frankly, Alexandra, I know you see this too, as women, we're sometimes the worst culprits of that. You know, it's like it's not about bashing men anymore. It's like it's about listening to the, you know, the tape that we have that pushes us or criticizes Us for, for taking more time that we need. We were not designed, you know, we're not designed with testosterone, for heaven's sake. It's just not. You know, I know I've learned a lot from listening to Dr. Sarah talk with you. Right? But I mean, we're not designed to go out and you know, be directive like that all the time. You know, we're designed to have this oxytocin flow, right. To tend and befriend and relate and you know, move through, move through our rhythms, get support, feel like we're part of something. That's where we shine.

Beautiful. I love that.

Yeah.

Yeah. Just making, I mean, I mean there's so many great things. Just as you were talking about the, the bleeding and coming, like what a different revolutionary way to look at our cycles versus like I'm bleeding, I'm on the rug or whatever. Versus hello, I am like divine goddess bringing in spiritual right like that. I'm gonna take that into my next cycle of like, wow, okay, it's time to open up.

Totally. I just did a workshop which I do periodically for young women for they were 9th this time it was 9th and 10th grade girls. And about them just really getting that they're goddesses and you know, particularly as they're stepping into sexuality and you know, potentially drugs and a lot of big adult decisions. How can they honor their body and honor their guidance about what, what's right for them and not right for them, you know, and be in their own clarity. And we talked about this, you know, about, about the moon cycle and you could just see all of them are like, whoa, whoa, whoa, like they just never heard about that. And then there was a lot, you know, there's a lot of stories and this comes up in my women's initiation programs too about, you know, the kinds of initiations we got around our bleeding. You know, I mean my, my Jewish mother in law who's in her late 80s, said that there was an old, you know, wives tale in, in her family that when a girl started bleeding and this happened to her, of course she didn't know what was happening. She thought she was dying. That's very common. You know, a lot of us don't, haven't, weren't even told what was happening. So she didn't know what's happening. And her aunt was there and her aunt hauled off and slapped her across the face. And my mother in law was like, oh dad, no idea what was going on. But the wives tale was that when a girl first starts bleeding, if you slapped her really hard across the face. You would alleviate her from having menstrual cramps for the rest of her life. Wow.

And it was just shocking. Wow. Whoa.

You know, so what, what a difference that we can make now, right, with, you know, whether we have daughters or not. But just to talk to young girls and to reclaim our cycle and to celebrate it, you know, it's not something that's dirty or a nuisance or, you know, even with pms, it's like, you know, pms, I think especially for women who are sexual, it's kind of like our time where we've absorbed everything. And you know, quite literally, if we're making love with men, we've been absorbing, you know, the energy of our man. We're having intercourse with him. And it's this time, many people say, where we're actually flushing all that out of our system. Like the stuff that we don't need anymore, we need to get rid of. It's kind of like a cleansing, you know. And so even the PMS is, you know, and some women have very severe PMS and we need to, you know, we don't want to alienate everybody in our life, you know, like being fire breathing dragons.

That's when like hormone balancing might exactly.

Like there might be so many things. But I'm just saying, like even in general, to honor that, you know, that kind of irritability, that bitchiness, you know, it's, it's also part of us setting boundaries and potentially, you know, I mean, just try this on as an idea is all I'm suggesting like that, that these are all aspects that we, we can, you know, write new stories about, you know, and ask ourselves about, and support each other with, you know, really honoring our bleeding. You know, our blood is, it's the, it's just one, you know, it's one of the most sacred of all, you know, aspects of life. It's what creates life. That blood. Literally none of us would be here without it. And so, you know, whatever that looks for us in terms of really honoring that. Yeah, and there's, you know, there's a lot of people. I just was on a couple different red tent teleseminars. I mean, thank goodness there's a lot of people. Thank you all that are, you know, raising awareness about this. We're talking about it. Just great.

Yes. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. It's fascinating and I love that. I like the celebration of it makes really honoring that and honoring our, you know, it kind of goes back to the self love and kind of the body love for so many, you know, we have such a disassociation and negative association to our body, to our cycle, to our yoni, to progress. Like, how do we bring more of that self love? And actually, like, this is where I am in my life of not only self love, but also like celebration, like awe and wow. Like I have a vagina. Like, wow, that's exciting.

Yeah.

So can you talk to us about that more just on the celebrating our bodies and you know, the body image and how harsh so many of us can be on our bodies, our size, our color, shape, dimples, yada, yada. All of it.

Yeah, well, it's really. We know this, but I think it bears repeating, especially if we're comparing ourselves to media images of women. There. There aren't any. There aren't even any out there anymore that aren't photoshopped, you know, you know, they're actually. What we're seeing isn't even real. And so it's really important to remember that because it, you know, we're being manipulated. Right. And, you know, Naomi Wolf has done some amazing writing on this and she talks about, you know, when we have this many women that are obsessed with their body or their dieting or they're spending a lot of money on cosmetics and plastic surgery. We don't even have the statistics in front of me. But just it's, you know, multi. Billions of dollars. That's just the money. Not to mention like the psychic energy, you know, that when we have. Look at how manipulated we're being, right? And just look at the sheer amount of potential power, energy that's getting siphoned off to these, you know, just in these really destructive, you could say that's certainly one aspect of it. Sort of, you know, frames versus, you know, come on, look what, look what's happening on the planet. And women, you know, we. We have so much power, you know, and we have, you know, more and more economic power than we've ever have political power than we've ever. I mean, we're in a radical sea change on the planet right now in terms of women's empowerment. I'm not saying we're there yet. You know, there's there's obviously horrible violence that's happening to women, and we're still not getting paid equally to men. So it's, you know, but. And you know, there's been a lot of shift that has happened. And, you know, I think it's why, you know, the Dalai Lama says, I think it's western women who are really going to save the planet. And there's a lot of, you know, people that are seeing that because, you know, we are the women. We. These rock your goddesses. You know, the kind of women that are listening to this, you know, we. We have the education, we have the economic power, we have the political power. We have the vision. You know, we're here in the age of Aquarius. Most of us, I believe, incarnated because we wanted to come and be a part of this change. And, you know, when we think about it that way, it's like, let's get our energy focused on that, you know, taking care of the children, bringing peace to the planet, you know, bringing more beauty, you know, bringing our spirit back into the body, right? I mean, women, we know how to do this. We know how to create community. We know what it looks like to marry our mind with the heart. Most of us are, you know, we're moving from the heart. We're learning that this is where intelligence lives, Right? We know that. We know about trusting our bodies. And so I didn't mean to get so philosophical, but I guess that's just where I'm at with it. And. And, you know, I think, yes. I mean, we're. Because we live in this culture, of course. I mean, I look at my face now and I'm like, oh, maybe I need to get Botox. I'm getting all wrinkly. And, you know, and I mean, it's just amazing, right? Like, and I stand in my Bikram yoga class and I look at my.

Thighs and I'm like, can I love my thighs today?

No, I really cannot love my thighs today. So, I mean, I'm not pretending. I mean, I'm very vain. Hello, look at me. I mean, I'm extremely vain. So I get this. You know, I struggle with it, too. And I think we can walk in beauty. You know, one of my. As part of my Shakti Manifesto, one of the tenets is that we. A woman who's awake to her Shakti power walks with beauty. And beauty shows up in so many ways. And it doesn't necessarily come from makeup or from cosmetic surgeries or what. You know, there's so many ways that beauty shows up. And so, you know, what does it look like to, you know, honor the parts of us that really are beautiful? Because women are beautiful. I don't care what shape or size we are, how old we are, how young we are, how big our boobs are, you know, how wrinkly we are or not wrinkly we Are, you know, women are beautiful. And so, you know, make, make. I just want women, you know, do what you got to do to get peaceful with yourself. Look, you know, if you keep on picking up the stick of I hate my thighs, you know, then let that one rest and pick up the stick of, you know, I love my curly hair. I got great hair. Karma this life, you know, I got great hair. My hair rocks. Bring the attention to the parts of you that you really can love, you know, because that again, the more we bring our energy there, the more we empower that. It's amazing how, you know, things become less important or we can actually change our bodies when we just stop putting so much of that energy on you're too this or you're not enough that, you know, and put. And let's bring our energy towards, like, what do we want to create in our life, in this life, you know, what do we want to manifest? How do we want to serve what brings us joy? And be super suspicious. We need to be suspicious of those thoughts, right? Yeah. And where are they coming from? And who's trying to manipulate me and who's frankly trying to take away my power? Because whether it's how we look or it's our sexuality, there's a reason so much energy has been put on, you know, denigrating the feminine. Yeah. It's because there's so much power there. Anytime we have this much energy towards something, calling it evil or sinful or whatever, you got to know it's because there's gold there. There's something really important. And we have that as women. And the more we go inward and we find it, you know, like in the work I'm doing, it's about it. How do we initiate that Shakti. Then we hear those messages and we're like, yeah, yeah, I'm not, I'm not buying that. Right. And it takes a little while, but we just, we start to not pay attention to them anymore. And again, because we start attracting beauty, we start attracting more and more of this life force energy and our sensuality and we're more joyful. It's like that. It just. They don't have the hooks. It hooks us less and less and less. Yeah.

It's just that practice, like not letting it hook you and being aware of it, you know, because I've had the same. You know, I was in fitness modeling and I have journals of like, hating my body and, like had like the perfect fitness model body and hated my body.

Yeah.

And it's just like so funny. I mean, now I'm putting less. I'm putting more attention on how I feel, and I literally. It's like, I feel freaking hot. Like, I feel like I'm. It's like, easy. I don't. I don't know. It's just. It's. I'm putting less attention on it, and I feel great. And I look in the mirror, I'm like, whoa, damn, you're looking good. Like, I genuinely feel that. And it's like, it feels good versus, like, always looking in the mirror and thinking you should lose 10 pounds or you should lose whatever, you know, it's like, no. Wow, you look good. You look good, girl.

That's so great. Good. See, this is it right there. Like, that's a woman.

Poof.

You know, who's. Who's found that groove, you know? Yeah, that. That's. It's so beautiful. And the thing is, we. We really do intuitively know this, right?

Yes.

Like, I mean, you know, there's, like, days where you're walking down the street and you're like, you know, there's no makeup on, your hair's a rack, you're in your sweats. You know, there's nothing like physically particularly attractive, but you just feel good and, you know, boom. Like, people are like, good morning. Hello. Right. I mean, we've all met women who are, you know, technically overweight. I met a woman at a workshop last summer who was, you know, quite overweight, probably, I don't know, 80 pounds overweight. I mean, she was a very large woman and small. She was. I could not take my eyes off of her. She's a dancer and just. She was so sensual, and she was so, like, clearly, like, loving her body and her groove, you know, and just in her juiciness. And I was like, that is a hot woman. She's hot. It has nothing to do with her being skinny or having the model body, right? I mean, it. This beauty, what we're talking about, that shakti, it comes from inside, right?

And so you create it whenever, right?

You create it whenever. And, you know, with whatever you're wearing. It's so, you know, men know this too. I mean, men. There's all kinds of men, of course, and they can be certainly seduced by the. Just the physical. But you talk to men, they get this. Men are like, they're attracted to our sexual confidence. They're attracted to our. Our ability to be in our feminine. Right? I mean, assuming they're a masculine oriented, heterosexual male, they're gonna be what. What they're attracted to in a woman. It. Again, it doesn't matter if she's 20. I was talking to my beloved about, you know, he had, like, you know, this amazing woman earlier in his Life who was 20 something, who was literally a model, like, physically the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. And, you know, he started dating her, and he finally got to have, you know, the big lovemaking scene with her. And it was like, he said she was, like, dead in her body. Just dead in her body. And, you know, men know that, like, what they. It's not about, like, the perfect body. It's about. About you inhabiting your body. It's about you embodying your spirit, being here. And, you know, when we're loving ourselves and we're feeling in our feminine and we're soft and we're an invitation, you know, and we're. We're awake to that divine feminine. There is nothing more enticing, you know, there's just nothing.

So that's like a great. If you're single, this is a great. I mean, it's a great conversation for anyone. But if you're single and you're like, you know, Because I know a lot of women don't date because they're like, oh, I'm not ready this, that I need to lose this, or whatever the stories are, Right? So it's all about owning it.

Oh, totally.

Embodying that shakti and saying, bring it.

Right, Right.

Yeah. It's so fascinating. Like, you know, I. As we said earlier, I'm a new mom, so some days my hair doesn't get washed. And like, some days, like today, it's actually snarling.

And.

I'm like, oh, my gosh, my hair is snarly. Okay, well, we're gonna rock this.

Oh, I'm thinking you're looking great, honey. You got the little headband going on.

Probably because I haven't washed it yet. But I practice this while I walk with my son. Sometimes we walk in the morning, and sometimes my hair is like, all. I'm like, I didn't look in the mirror. I kind of just have my yoga clothes on, no makeup on, and I'm like, you know, there's part of me I want to feel beautiful. I'm like, okay, I can feel beautiful. So I just, like, practice strutting my step. Yeah, but it totally makes a difference. Like, it shifts the energy from, like, mom who didn't wash her hair to doesn't have time to is tired and exhausted and looks crappy to whatever. I'm gonna Rock it. Because this is how. This is what I got right now.

Yeah, and I bet, you know, if you did an experiment, you would. You could have snarly hair and the whole thing, and just with that shift in energy, it would. You would be getting a totally different response from the world. Which isn't, by the way, just a response from, you know, men who are like, good morning, baby. You know, like. But it's. It's literally like life responds because that's the shakti. And this planet is hungry, starving for that. You know, we're starving for that. So, you know, small animals will love you and small children will run up to you and, you know, just. You'll just notice life respond because life responds to life. And particularly, you know, this shakti is. Well, my definition of shakti is it's about love, right? It's this real capacity for us to know ourselves as the source of love. Really. That's our purpose as women like, to really channel, be. Be the light, you know, be the light of love. You know, be able to flow that, right? So when we can walk down the street going, you know, like, if we're conditionally loving ourselves, I haven't taken a shower, da, da, I'm an exhausted bottle or whatever. And we're not being in that, that we have one experience. If we're in that place where we're like, yeah, I am all that. And, you know, I'm a being of love. I'm a. I'm a divine feminine vessel here. I'm just gonna know that, right? Then we're. We're being in that unconditionally loving space where. So that love can really flow through us. You know, it's love, it's our energy. You know, it's our. It's our life force energy, which is our sensuality, our sexuality, our passion. And it's also our, you know, our capacity to connect with spirit, to know ourselves as divine. And, you know, when we've kind of got all. I think of those as three centers, you know, the circle, the heart, and the downward facing triangle. Like when we have those kind of, you know, awareness and we've just got, you know, we weaving those practices in, whether it's just remembering during the day or, you know, how we, how we do that. I mean, that's a lot of what I teach. There's just different ways we step more and more and more into that. Yeah, we're. We're totally walking with beauty. You know, we're being that goddess incarnate, right? The working mom goddess. Incarnate, Right.

Yeah.

Moving goddess. Incarnate.

And you experience the world differently, Right? Like, every time I make that shift, something miraculous, magical, serendipitous, whatever happens, because I'm open to it. I mean, it might be simple. Something simple like the squirrels start talking to Emerson and I, and then we start talking to them. But if I was in my head.

You would have missed it. Yeah. And it's so beautiful. I mean, of course, the little ones, they're already so tapped in. Right. So Emerson would be like, mom, like, you know, you would probably hopefully grab your attention and, like, you're missing it.

Yes.

Happening right here. Yeah. Yeah. It's awesome.

I love that. The open, receptive, divine, feminine vessel.

Yeah.

All right, so let's talk about sex. You were just saying, and I read this on your. In Theos class.

Oh, good.

Awakening the tantric goddess. You were saying that there is a sexual dysfunction in our society. And I feel like I've read this somewhere, that 50% of society is either having low libido, not orgasmic, you know, whatever, other problems. So can you talk about that? And you also said the woman who your beloved had dated, that was dead in her body. Like, what. What's going on here? And what do we do to aliven it? Awaken that sexual shakti?

Yeah, well, and, you know, that statistic is from the American Medical association. So, of course, it's a very pathological look. And one of my points of bringing that forward on the. In the entheos class that I just did was just how damaging it can be to be labeled. Right. And that we can start thinking there's something wrong with us. And so, you know, my approach. And of course, I'm. You know, I'm. I am not a therapist and I am not a doctor. So my approach as a coach is really about moving people towards what it is that they're wanting. Not going back and healing the past or looking at what could be, you know, wrong, obviously, physically. So there. There. There are those components that are very real components for some women. Right. Obviously, if there's been a lot of sexual abuse, incest, and that's a lot of women in our culture, if that. If those issues, you know, those issues need to be addressed, they need to be handled skillfully, you know, with. With good professional support. And there could be hormone issues going on and, you know, physiological things that need to also be healed. Having said that, I still believe there's a huge amount of women who are, you know, dealing with a label about being sexually dysfunctional. When really what their bodies are saying is, I don't want to have sex like this anymore. This doesn't turn me on. And maybe our bodies are actually brilliant vessels of divine wisdom. And they're saying, I don't think so. You know, that is not fulfilling to me. That's not what I want. I want to be touched at the heart. I want to be awakened. I want to know myself as goddess and I want to be made love to as goddess. And when we learn as women, because I think the job starts here, like, was we start to learn more about our own sexual responsiveness, what our bodies need. You know, again, this varies radically depending on what life cycle we're in. It's not. There's no formula that works for every woman. So it's, it's a deep inquiry. It's a, it's a coming back into your own sovereignty and clarity about, you know, what does this body want? What turns me on is probably not going to turn you on, you know, or what turned me on last week might not turn me on this week. Right? We're. We're feminine. We're in the feminine. We're in the flow. We're, we're like the weather. It's. It's moving. We want to be in some kind of a dynamic dance with our own shakti. That's really what the shakti is, is our life force, energy. And so what I'm really curious about, you know, what I love to, to investigate in my own life and in supporting my clients and students, is really what is, you know, what is this movement that's in you that wants to be expressed? And as we start to honor that, you know, can we, can we loosen, you know, can we start to help you loosen whatever might be in the way of you feeling more pleasure? And that could be your relationship with spirit. That could be your relationship to your emotional life. What you need in terms of love and appreciation, it could be physiologically like, what, what, what is turning your body on or like, in terms of your sexual energy. It's, it's all of those things, right? Because we're, we're these multifaceted beings and especially women sexually, you know, we're, we're complicated. There's it all. It's this big, fascinating. You know, we're, we're internal. Men are, you know, they have that amazing penis that just sticks out and it bangs into things and it gets touched all the time when they put their clothes on and off and that they're, you know, they're out There. And. And for the most part, you know, their. Their sexual natures and responsiveness are relatively simple compared to the woman. The woman is like, what is going on? You know, that yonich is, like, way inside. You know, yoni means source. You know, it's the source of life. It's. It's very internal for us. And as we start to honor that, as we start to know, you know, what.

That.

What our truth is in this moment about where our sexuality is, and we. We honor that, then we either attract partners who will honor it or. And. Or we attract more of that from our existing partners if we're in relationship, hopefully. Or sometimes it means we get clear that the relationship we're in is not actually serving us or it's not wanting to grow the way we want to. But, you know, my feeling is we were born these just magnificent, beautiful, responsive, you know, vessels of divine, feminine shakti, passion and sexuality. And as we learn how to come back to her and listen, you know, inside to what it is that she's really wanting, and we can really reclaim her, we can wake her up. And so, you know, if we've been. If you've been labeled dysfunctional or you feel like, ugh, I just went through menopause. I feel all dried up. I'm just not turned on anymore. Or you're a new mom and you're like, please, man, don't even touch my body. I don't want anybody touching my body. Like, you know, these are all specific places where we might find ourselves and we can learn to find our way back, you know, to that goddess. I like to say, she's. She's not dead. She's just sleeping. You know, we can. We can wake her up. Course I'm glad you're mentioning it, because it's a. I think it's a pretty valuable resource. I gave 10 very specific ways for. For women. If women are interested in waking up that goddess inside of themselves. And I recommend. I don't care if you're in a relationship or not. I think that's the place to be begin, you know, I mean, we have this fantasy, right? Like, oh, some man's gonna come in, the tantric lover of my dreams, and he's gonna take one look at me, I'm gonna take one look at him, and I'd be like, oh, my God, he's gonna awaken me. And I mean, it just be like, he's gonna unleash my kundalini, right? And it's true. That happens. You know, I've Been fortunate enough to have a few of those.

That's.

That's great. But I also feel like, you know, for it to really be something you own, right? That it's not attached to a particular relationship, but that, you know, we. We get to own, that we get to cultivate that. And, you know, frankly, when my marriage dissolved and I spent time being single and I spent a period of time actually being celibate and that I wasn't being sexual with other people because I felt like, wow, I just need to really know Lisa, like, who am I and what's really true? It was one of the most highly, you know, sexual times of my life. That period. I was just like, oh, this orgasmic energy is mine. Like, you know, I can feel it, and I can cultivate it. Just sitting in my meditation practice in the morning without even touching myself. You know, my breath with sound, with movement, with some of these tantric techniques, and, you know, I can just open my channel of shakti, sexual orgasmic energy. I can feel it right now, you know, like, it's available to me all the time. And this is lubricating every cell of my body with nitric oxide, right. And oxytocin and all those wonderful fountain of youth hormones. You know, it's making me feel really good. And sure, it's attracting more abundance and it's, you know, attracting people. Oh, it's attracting my cat.

There you go. The cats. Like, the cats are connoisseurs of energy.

They are, right? So, like, whatever, you know, we're wanting, it's an incredibly empowering thing to know that we own this as women, you know. And then, of course, in this place, do you want to share that with your beloved or you want to, you know, use it? Which I did for a long time of like, okay, I'm really calling the beloved in. You know, I had a few dry runs there, but, you know, he did. He came right in and he claimed me. And, you know, we're over two years now, and it's just this incredible, you know, flow of beauty and explanation, exploration. You know, like, we've barely tapped the surface of what is there for us sexually. Yeah. And. And that's beautiful. And I actually, you know, deep out of him, I'm definitely way beyond where I was because of the dynamic between us. Right. Like, you know, this. This is life force energy, this. Right. I mean, it can create a baby. Right? It can create all new life, or it can create, you know, it's. It's creating all kinds of things right now. It's creating new opportunities, creating businesses. It's, you know, that's the other thing I want to say, Alexandra. You know, for all women, like when, when we tap into our shakti, it, it's creative energy and we get to say like, we can send this toward, you know, maybe you want to start a non profit. Like it's not, it's not. Yes. And I want you to have pleasure and I want you to have, you know, orgasms all day long if you want, because they're good for you and they're good for the planet. So I mean it can be about sexual pleasure, of course, but it's, it's bigger than that. It's like we were talking about earlier. It's like what, what kind of shift do we want to create as you know, the, the women, the conscious women who are, you know, anchoring the shakti again on the planet. Because, you know, I mean, yeah, I made love this morning and it was delicious. And you know, here I am serving and teaching just like you are. Like, it's, it's, it's, it's moving out into the world and in potent ways and that, that's what, that's what really turns me on. Like I love working with women who are conscious and professional and they're, you know, they're, they've got it going on and for the most part they're just, you know, they're, they're wanting to bring a little more of this feminine in as part of their power. Right. So that it's not just, you know, so tippy on the masculine side. Right. Which often, you know, comes with stress and lack of sustainability and all those other things too. Right.

Interesting on the. I love what you're just saying too with the, this energy being like you were saying, you're cultivating it, but you weren't like self pleasuring. Like you could have it in mat or you could have it in masturbation. You can have it while you're meditating.

Yeah.

Like it's an energy to cultivate and I think it's an interesting thing because there's, and I have it too of like the self pleasuring. What it, you know, how do you do it and how do you cultivate the energy? And you need to be like going for the orgasm. But it seems very, and it is very like masculine goal driven to how do I cultivate that energy and juiciness at any point? You know, like it seems like there's for me and I think in our culture the separation of. You can have that Sexual shakti, sensual juiciness over here. But you can't have it with your kids. You can't have it in the workplace. Like, how do you do, you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think there's. Right. I mean, during corporate America, you know, just like there's sort of a dress code. You know, you're probably not going to walk in with all your shakti goddess stuff going on, right? And so, you know, again, there's a weaving that's, that's appropriate. And you know, I tend to be somebody who goes into environments like that and look for the ways that I can be an infiltrator, you know, but not alienate everybody, right? So it's finding that, you know, that balance place. And I ask goddess a lot, like, okay, use me. How do you want to use me here? Right? So we, it's definitely a balanced place. I mean, so that's one piece and, and two with our kids. I mean, that, that, that's a place where I just think there's so much room, right, because, you know, the kid, the kids are hungry for this feminine quality, right? Of course they are. And so, and, and who better than us to model that for them? You know, model what. That, what that is for them and in healthy ways. And that, that goes with, I think, with the, the mother and the father, assuming there's a mother and a father in the home too, you know, like, what's it look like to model for them? Just like we model healthy communication or healthy, healthy fighting, you know, when there's conflict, there's conflict all the time. Like, how do we navigate when, you know, I'm angry and you're angry. Right. And what's it look like to, to, you know, be in an, in a family where the feminine is honored? You know, like, how does, how does the masculine honor the feminine? How frankly, does the feminine honor the masculine? Right, because we're just as guilty of saying very disrespectful things about them. Oh, that's just the way guys are, right? And to honor the masculine, right, that's, that kind of, you know, that's the weaving together again of Shakti and Shiva. That is, that is really important. And around self pleasuring. Yeah. I think that, you know, one of the gifts that I received from tantra was expansion of my idea about sexuality from this little tiny thing, you know, that was like something that happened below the waist into like, woof. It's like a way of being in life that has to do with honoring all and rejecting nothing and really coming from this place of loving all of life, including the parts that are feel unlovable. Right. And that that expansive view included also expanding the view of sexuality so that it's, you know, yes, pleasure is wonderful for us, and I think we should be having more of it, especially healthy and conscious pleasure. And what does it look like to, you know, move the energy so that it's not just a genital experience, but it's actually moving to the heart. It's actually contributing to bringing more light into the body. Because sexual energy, the orgasmic energy, is light, electricity energy. Right. And that's enlightenment. Right. Looking at the word enlightenment, it's like, how do we become beings of more light and, you know, cultivating that energy and having that sort of broader view of like, wow, what does my sexual energy want to teach me? What does it want from me instead of me just like, oh, I'm trying to have an orgasm. And there's nothing wrong with that either. Right. But it's more like expanding our view to have sexuality be part of the wholeness of who we are as, you know, sacred, sensual beings. My cat's drooling on me. He's so excited.

That is fantastic. I think that is a perfect completion spot. The cat is drooling because he is so enlightened. He is sensually enlightened. Beautiful. Thank you so much. That was. We covered so many topics. So fantastic. So helpful for me personally, and I know, so helpful for all the lady goddesses out there. And can you just share where we can find more about you and your work and your coaching and your programs?

Yeah. Awakeningshakti.com so that's S H A K T I and I have a really rockin free gift right there on my homepage. It's my Shakti Womanifesto and it's a very cool little mini poster. So it's great to just remind you of kind of the core principles. But it also comes with a free little mini course that I'm offering. So if you're attracted to these ideas and you're like, I just want a little more depth, actually break them down. And that's my gift. So I would love for people to check that out if you want to stay in contact with me and check out my initiation programs too. I'm not sure when are we airing Alexandra?

You know, I'm taking my sweet goddess time, so.

Good. Anyway, check that out on my site so I won't date anything since we're not sure about that.

Yeah, I'm Part of her. I signed up for her six month program, but I'm also taking that. That's your initiation. Is that.

Yeah.

Yes. Okay. So I am in the process of that and I'm taking again my sweet goddess time. But I highly recommend her and her work and her books and her programs and just being in her energy just is amazing and well worth the investment.

Oh, thank you so much for that endorsement and thank you for the work you're doing, sweetheart. You're just, you're taking your sweet goddess time and, and, and you're putting out such beautiful work. Like, I just love the people that you're gathering and you were rocking the goddess stuff and you're an awesome model, really, of that for me. And you're a new mom. Like, thank you for showing us how you're weaving it. Right. You're doing it and I just, I really honor you, Alexandra. Thank you.

Thank you.

Yeah.

And it's a great. It's a great, I guess I could say testament to this conversation that you're having of really, for me, surrendering to, I mean, my role in our company is the chief goddess. So holding that space and I don't have to be the one doing everything. It's been just really, really interesting and fascinating in a learning process for me of stepping into my goddess energy and my chief goddessness and. And honoring the gifts of the divine feminine in a company. It's just very. It's enlightening.

That's so great. Here's like, this is so, so rockin. Right? Like, that enthusiast has a chief goddess. Hello. Right. Yeah. And I'm just, I'm. I love it. You know, I love seeing what's, you know, coming forward right now in so many ways. And there's so many beautiful men out there who are tapping into the goddess. Right. Like, we're all, we're all bringing her back. And thank you to you and Brian for just, you know, modeling that, you know, not just in your partnership, but in, in the company too. You know, that's. It's awesome. Yeah. Super awesome. Yes.

We have an amazing husband and an amazing team. I mean, yeah. As you said at the beginning, you're very blessed. I'm very blessed. All of us women are just blessed to be alive.

We are. It's a good time. It's a really good time. Really is. Thank you so much.

Thank you. Sending you lots of love. We hope you enjoyed this episode of Mama Goddess. Sending you lots of love and blessings. Blessings. If you'd like to connect more, go to mamagoddess.com until next time. Keep rocking it and have an awesome day.