Wild Creative with Tami Lynn Kent

Welcome to Mama Goddess. I'm your host, Alexandra J. Johnson. This podcast is all about rocking your goddess life, creating vibrant health and celebrating motherhood and family life. It's about living an authentically awesome life. Let's have. Hello, and welcome. I'm Alexandra J. Johnson, and today we have an extraordinarily divinely feminine goddess with us, and I'm so excited to talk with her. And her name is Tammy Lynn Kent, and she is a holistic women's healthcare provider with a master's degree in physical therapy, advanced training in multiple bodywork techniques, and she has the ability to read energetic patterns of the body. She's the founder of Holistic Pelvic Care and the author of Wild Femin Mothering from your center, Wild Creative. And she is also the mother to three beautiful sons. So welcome, Tammy.

Thank you. I'm so excited to talk with you today.

Yay. I love talking with you and I love your work. And as you know, the latest, I have that, the next one. Got that. And then Wild Feminine is on my Kindle, so I'm a big fan.

You got the trilogy.

I know, Totally. It's, like, so great. It's awesome. So I'd love to start off with a little bit about your journey into how you got to do this work that you do, because I think it's a beautiful demonstration of following your intuition and following your heart, like going down the path to maybe medical, to opening up to this whole feminine world. So can you just share a little bit on that? I think it's so awesome.

Yes, I can. And let me just ask you, is it going to be okay? The birds I've got, I mean, I can hear them. This is my wildlife, and it's real. And we have a lot of animals in our lives. And what's funny, birds are really sensitive energy readers, and so they can feel the excitement in our conversation. And so what happens? They get really excited. So they're like, on the edge of their cage right now, chirping really loudly. And usually they're more quiet, but they'll probably settle down. But just let me know if I need to cover them and let them just chill for a little. Okay, guys, you're really excited. So in Wild Creative, I really wrote that because, for one, when I'm working with women, the heart of their desire is often to feel alive and vital and creative. And that's the core, especially in the pelvic bowl, when we talk about the creative power, bringing life in that, that's something that I think everyone wants to Feel that creative aliveness. So it's a theme that comes up again and again, you know, And I wrote Wild Feminine to talk about the energetics of the pelvic bowl, specifically, as I was learning to translate it, Mothering from youm Center. I wrote to really talk about the mother experience because that's so unique. But then Wild Creative was this piece that I felt like this comes up again and again in conversation. People are wanting to feel creative and vital. And I have three sons, and I want them to stay alive, to stay in touch, you know, as I was witnessing their unfolding, their beauty right before my eyes. How could I help keep that alive and stay in touch with that? And where are we maybe losing touch with that? So those are the questions that I was playing with. I had my own path with that in that I wasn't sure. You know, I went the linear pathway of school and was kind of achievement oriented. Grades, got into UC Berkeley, was encouraged because I was good at science and I was a female and was getting good grades. I was strongly, strongly encouraged by the female mentors, professors, to either become a medical doctor or get a PhD. And I mean, it was, this is what you need to do because you're a female. And so I think there is that and there's that we have these opportunities. But my soul was calling me a different direction. And so this was, how am I going to begin to learn to listen to that soul currency inside that creative energy? And so while creative is this too, it tells the story of that and how I ended up going my own way and actually finding so much more abundance than I ever imagined.

That's awesome. And I think it's so great too. Just the feminine and trusting yourself. It's a beautiful demonstration of, like, you know, powerful people telling you that this is the path you should take. And then you just saying, wow, it seems a little maybe crazy, maybe you thought it was a little crazy that you were gonna go down this path and then look at what it's turned into. Hel. Hello?

And I think maybe too, not only were they powerful, but they really pulled back when I chose to go a different route, you know, so there also is that pull of support and how I was appreciating that as a female. You know, when you become achievement oriented, you love that positive feedback. And these powerful women at this university saying, we see your capacity and we want you to do this. And then when I chose not to, what I chose was to go to physical therapy school. And in their eyes, that was less than my Value, you know, And I really went against their advice. And I don't even know why I listened to something inside, but part of it was that I looked at what they were asking me to do on that achievement path. And I took a year off too, to kind of think about it. And I worked in a lab and I saw what people had to do to get a PhD and I did some internships and I saw what people had to do to both go through medical school but also be a doctor. And both of those felt absolutely soul crushing to me. And I just couldn't do that to my soul. I knew that I didn't know I would leave.

Yeah, I love that. And I resonated with personally because I had, you know, where my college, they really wanted me to get a master's and to be a coach because I played college volleyball. And I was like. And it was in Iowa. And I'm like, I'm gonna move to California, be a personal trainer. And they're like, what the hell are you thinking? Like, you're making my professor. My advisor said you're making like a huge mistake. Like, you could be a professor. Like, you get paid really well. I'm like, no, I don't want to do that. And just now I look at my life, I'm like, that's why that's so.

Interesting to bring that up. Because sports is the same way. And when people are good or show an ability in something, there's this pressure to go a certain route. And I think that's one of the things I wanted to bring in. And even writing about this, whenever I write, I sit with these questions, which is really satisfying. But what is creativity? First I was, what is femininity? What is the feminine? How do we find it? How do we access it? How do we use it? Mothering. I really went deep into lineage and mothering and the spirit door. And then with wild Creative, it was, what is creativity and where are we losing touch with it and how do we regain it? And one of the places we're losing touch with it is the systems we're putting our young people through, which most depending on your class and sort of. But a lot of people are ending up into college, where that's very achievement based. And so whether it's sports or classes, wherever you're finding your success, so to speak, and then there's this pressure to continue on a linear trajectory. And yet at the same time, a lot of those linear trajectories are crumbling. And I think that is because we're In a more feminine time. So the masculine linear pathway. And isn't male or female. This is masculine linear, which we can talk about kind of what the beauty of the masculine is. But when we make it into those linear pathways of you go here, and then you go here, and then you go here, that is falling away as a lot of people are finding that careers aren't forever anymore. You know, you don't just pick one path and stay there forever. A professor. My dad was a professor. And the generation of people now that are professors have a very different experience from the generation before. They're much less tenure, much less. You know, a lot of adjunct faculty, they call it where they pay you less and give you less guarantee of staying there. Often people are working two teaching jobs instead of, you know, so there's. Things have changed. Those linear pathways aren't even necessarily working. So how do we then find that inner guidance and strengthen it and begin to go from there? And how do we actually make a profession and a life for ourselves? Those are some of the questions I wanted to answer.

Very cool. Very cool. Well, I love the creative. And you talk about this. There's the creative currency, like, how do we. And what does creativity mean for you? Because I think there's the creative as a purpose and a passion and a way of making a living. And then there's also, just as you were saying earlier, just being creative, like that juice and that aliveness that comes from just being creative. So how do we access that, like, creative field?

So, and that's the other thing that I think I bring to this conversation is that I'm talking from an energy perspective. So energetic plays a role here. And learning how to read those energetics is really vital. So every single person has a vibrant field that I would call the creative field, where it's a place where we align with, or not quite aligned. You can align it and work with the flow, but it's this place where we interface between spirit and body. So we have the body, and then we have the energy field. And then beyond that, the spirit realm. And that's the creative field, where we interface with the pure potential. You know, there's all this potential. Athletes do this a lot, actually. They visualize. And any athlete that's ever broken a record saw it in visualization first, set up that potential in the potential field, felt it, believed it probably had an aptitude, but really set the energy of it and then came into form with actually doing that. So every single person has this place where they interface with the energy field. And when you start to acknowledge that and start working with that, you start to realize that you can actually access this for yourself, because you are inherently made this way. You are made with a beautiful creative field. And I think of this as related to the female body, because that's where we first gestate. Where we first make our bodies and go from spirit into body is in our mother's body. And that's where we first bring this field alive. So it's related to the female body and the pelvic bowl. It's connected to that. And then it comes into this form where then we can. Part of why I speak the language of this field well is because I've spent so much time with the pelvic bowl in my holistic practice with women. I've been doing this for more than 15 years, and I feel like a translator for the female body. I've learned to read the energy and translate it to the woman in front of me. And Wild Creative is based on that. It's based on what I know about taking the feminine, the masculine, blending it together, setting intentions in this powerful, creative, pure potential field space that each one of us has within and then bringing creations out from that. You know, whether we're making a child or art or we're making a home or we're making a profession or product or anything or relationship.

So this. There's the feeling of, as you're just talking about it, there's a feeling of not, I'm gonna use something, and people might have an issue with it, but the idea of kind of lean in and force your way into business and like, this. This in this way of going about business and life, of like, you need to just, you know, grab the reins and take it and do it. But as you're talking about, it just feels like a softer way of using feminine powers to actually bring our creative dreams to life. Can you just talk about that a little bit of how we harness that and actually, how does it show up?

Absolutely. Gosh, there's so many things I want to say about this because it's so important, especially so if you can imagine, if we've been on the linear trajectory, our energy system gets limited by that. And it almost gets kind of like, if you can imagine a beautiful sphere of light, it gets kind of pinched and squished down. That's what it looks like to me when we get into those linear pathways. And so we limit our potential. And people will sometimes feel like, I just need to push through this and get to the next place and what often happens, you know, people can do that for a certain amount of time, but then there may be an illness that you know, has them slow down or there may be something happen in their family or if they have children, they'll no longer, that path will no longer work. So I think there's some illusions that it doesn't work for anybody, truth be told, because it's not good for our bodies and it isn't good for our energy field and we actually lose a good part of our true intuition and our inspiration energy. But you can kind of go along unless something happens that slows you down a little bit and then you are forced to re examine. But the beauty of those interruptions of that is like a child for example, let's say people often I work with mothers and they feel like all of a sudden they can't do the linear trajectory because now they have a child. Well, children are the canaries in the coal mine. They're really showing us the true health of our heart spaces and our homes and they're showing us how much wealth we're putting into that inner space. Because you can't ignore it now a lot of grown ups can kind of ignore that and just muscle through. The child will cry out and talk to you and make you come back to your center. But even if we don't have a child, the truth is that that inner part of us, that creative part, that vital part, slowly being neglected when we have that and perhaps even dying. And so it's a real callback to this wholeness. And I think it's an invitation and exciting opportunity. And what I found by going sort of being willing to jump off the linear pathway for a little while and maybe flounder, not really know what I'm doing because there isn't a map, you know, it's not as clear. But if we take time to be in that vulnerability of the not knowing and learn how to read more of our center, I've feel that the creative field communicates to us all the time. But we have to have ways of hearing it. So we have to have practices that help us stay in touch with that, whatever that is. For me that is going out on a walk. Anytime I go out and touch the earth, I feel more connected. Drumming I love to drum, so I'll get on my drum writing and just spending time with my children or my animals. So those things, it's good to know what your go to things are to come back to that place. And then as a businesswoman I can Say there's two things. One, I have to be comfortable with being imperfect. And a lot of times there's just these imperfections where I don't have everything dialed in. I run a little late or this happens. But I know that I'm very much in touch with that space inside, because not only am I touching into it for myself and my creative, I'm attending to my children in whatever need pops up for them in whatever nonlinear way. And then because of that, I may not always seem like I'm on that linear, you know, got every T crossed and every I dotted. But then there's these incredible expansions that happen for me, like being able to write a book or create this holistic pelvic care practice that is now growing and is more international, and having people this fall come from Mexico and Canada and Europe and Australia, and I'm still just here humbly taking care of my family and my life. And so I think being very comfortable with that imperfection and letting it start, you know, letting it kind of mulch until it starts to grow into something valuable. But you have to be comfortable with that vulnerability, and it can be very productive. It's just not productive in the same manner. It's more like a garden that might all of a sudden produce all this bounty in one area, and then maybe it's more fallow the next year, or maybe a different crop comes up, you know?

Yeah, I love that. I think, just as you were saying, that we as women need to be willing to let go of what's happening out there and what people are gonna think about what we're doing in order to, like, go into this space. Right, right.

Well, and here's the kicker. I think that really the true feminine field not only has been ignored, but not honored. We really aren't collectively honoring how much women are doing when they tend the field. And it may not be outerly visible, but, like, let's again use children as an example. When there's a tending of that child and that child's needs, it's not necessarily outwardly visible. It's creating a soul over many years of mothering, and it's so not seen or valued. So we women have to really value it and be knowing that this priority is right. Even if we end up on the outside, maybe looking like we don't have it together in one particular thing because we were at home taking care of a child's needs for longer than we anticipated, for example, those sorts of things can happen when we're tending the feminine field. So Part of it is knowing how vital what we're doing is not worrying too much about the outer reflection. Because the outer reflection, until we have a major shift, which is happening, but it's slowly happening, it may not be honored, it may not be recognized as how vital and valuable. So being willing to stand in that space and just knowing that from our own inside, that's essential, what we're giving and doing.

I love that. I think I read it in Mothering from youm Center. You were just talking about. Maybe there's a chapter on tending the home and how important that is to tend to the home. And I just like. I mean, I just read it and I had like, just kind of like I remember getting tears and just like, ah, like honoring that. Like you're creating a beautiful sense sacred home for your family, whether that's you and your husband or your boyfriend or your children, whatever. But can you just talk about the power of that? Because I think that there's also this idea which I have had that that's less than like we've evolved as women that me to tend to the home just is a waste of my time. So I've had to work through that and realize, oh, I kind of like it.

And you know, and that also energetically. So this also evolved for me when I was more in the linear trajectory and both my husband and I were leaving home to go to work every day and I worked at a hospital and he worked downtown. And once I had a child and could look back, I realized how cold the home fires were. We could get away with that because we didn't have a child. We did have a German shepherd, which we still had to come home and tend. But overall, the home fire was cold. The energetic quality in the home was cold. And we didn't recognize it as much until I had a child. Then I had to go into that cold space and realize that I had spent years of training, very little of which had to do with the home. And we talk about the home arts, but gardening, canning, cooking, some people are gifted at it, some people aren't. I'm gifted at some aspects, like the healer aspect. I'm not great at cooking and things like that because these are real arts that are learned over time, hand by hand. But when I tend my home, so even when I'm organizing, I'm sort of the energy organizer at the end of the night with support as my kids get older. But it's like putting things back into their place. It feels good. It's like a feng shui and you're actually energizing it. And if you spend a little extra care on your home, like, say, on a weekend, and you're doing a little bit more, you're working on the yard, you feel it. You feel the satisfaction. And also the way that energy field feels tended. And a tended field supports everyone more. I used to notice when my children were younger, too, that when I tended a particular area, like where they would play, they would come in the next morning and play with less conflict with that tended space. So we all respond to it. I mean, it's a huge benefit to our own bodies to have that. And then the other part is, I think it's symbolic of the inner space, you know, rather than the I'm in the out, I'm doing, I'm visible, I'm seeing. That's the masculine. And there's beauty and amazing things with that energy. But it should be balanced by an equally strong feminine. That inner home, that sanctuary, that beauty, that energy field that supports that outer movement. I think that's where we're missing that. That there's really an energetic abundance that happens when we do that that we may not even value or recognize as valuable.

I just feel, like, at peace hearing you say that. It's so beautiful. And I think it's an important. Like, obviously you've written books on this, like, for us women to give that to ourselves, you know, like, not feeling like. And again, there's some women that really want to get out there, and they just are like, really? That's their dharma. But most of the women that I talk to and that I work with are like, I'm kind of just tired. Like, I just want to be home cooking and just taking care of my family. But I feel like I'm not doing good. I'm not enough, you know?

And I think that's, again, where we have to learn to look towards this inner place. Because if we look towards the outer, there still is not really the validation of, yes, what you're doing is amazing. You're helping tend the home. Wow. You know, because we don't understand it from the energetic perspective or even of the power of the feminine. So part of that is really giving ourselves permission, that this is so vital, this is so important. This is so precious. And on a deeper level, I feel like, let's say it's a mother female, or you could or cannot have children. I don't want to just exclude and say it's only for having children. But the woman of the home is often the visionary when she gets into that dreamy space, she can see, see and connect the dots. And even in a gay relationship of two women, one woman will usually play this role. So it's the more feminine person and it's the place where it's getting into that inner space and kind of seeing, you know, I think our year should include this and maybe it's planning ahead to get aways or you know, or we should focus on this or let's do a little extra tending here. That person is very powerful and it's. Yet we have to recognize the potency of that and what it brings and what it brings to then be carried out into the world by whomever is going out might be that woman herself, might be her partner, might be her children, but it's that spreading out from that very solid tended place.

Gorgeous. So we were talking about the linear and you know, you talk about this more like holistic way and kind of like cyclical. Can you talk about that more and what that means and what that might look like in day to day life and life seasons.

Right. Well, so I think everyone should look at their own season, their year and kind of, you know, like a farmer look at when are my seasons of productivity, when do I tend to be really out and out and when am I strong and plan things around then, you know, do your. So like for example, I teach my classes in the fall and the spring because those are my more masculine times where I'm moving out into the world. I feel strong, I feel supported by the energy flow. So my classes are always in those two time periods. And then my summer and my winter are more my inner restorative period. So I try not to take on as much. I lighten my client loads. I plan more time with the family where we just have nothing scheduled, where we can really deepen in make fires, take walks, make food. And you know that it's look. But everybody has a different season. Now some of that might depend on where you live, but I also think it's part of our own biology. What time of year is good for for moving outward and what time is more replenishing. So there's that annual cycle and then I also think there's seasons in a person's life. You know, there may be periods where you're really, you might feel like you're making it, you know, you're making strides at work or you're creating things or you really see the abundance or you have a baby and that's a big burst of energy right there. Woo. And it just comes into your life and radically changes everything. Those are what I would call big outward years. You know, it's almost like the bumper crop. And then there's going to need to be fallow time. So if we only see the outer, we might be hard on ourselves when we're not bringing in as much or not showing as much or not creating as much. But we're then replenishing for what we gave and what we did, and we're probably retooling for the next phase of whatever it's going to be. So, again, recognizing those cycles and working with them. You know, I work like a farmer with my own creative field, and I plant seeds intentionally, and I have annual practices. And then I also recognize greater cycles of energy where I know that, okay, I'm coming to the end of this period. This is probably going to be a fallow time. And rather than seeing that as a negative thing or I'm not doing enough, you know, that's a common feeling. I relish it because I know it's deepening my soil, it's deepening my energy field for the next round, which I may not even know yet. And that's where we leave room for spirit, too. You know, it's also just not just me. There's this broader field, the feel of potential that we're connected with. And when we work with seasons, I think we're better aligned with the seasonal environment of the energy field. So we can kind of tune into that and tap in that and leave room for what spirit might have in mind. Right.

So if our lives are super packed, we're not leaving space for something to come in. I like that. And I have to say, I have to appreciate you because I was planning on taking time offline and off email for the winter, and I read your book and I was like, you were talking about this and the seasons, and I was thinking, yeah, I. And I have it on my whiteboard. October to January is my creative renewal season cycle. So thank you. I know once I get into it, it's gonna be amazing, but it's like, you know, I'm in the midst of doing this, and you just get in the midst of life being awesome and full force, and to actually consciously step back and listen to spirit and soften, that takes mojo on my part. And I think it is for a.

Lot of us, it does. Well, especially I do think sometimes the first thing you have to do is deal with what's accumulated. And that isn't always comfortable either. You know, it's like the garden. I keep using that metaphor because it just works so well. We are like that. I mean, we're wild creatures. But it's when you have, you know, you have to go out there and kind of work through some of the stuff that, you know, till it under and whatnot. And sometimes there are feelings or other things that have piled up your own unmet needs that comes to the surface first. And that's the other thing is just preparing that it might be a little bit of a down where you feel like. And so I put a lot of self care into that. You know, taking baths, taking walks. I like to do sauna, go out with girlfriends, you know, whatever just helps you sort of process through that. And then when you get through that, you sink down more. And I feel like my feminine over the times of doing that now my feminine looks so forward to it. Whereas before it was like, what am I going to do with all this space? You know, but really there's not that much space.

Like you have three kids.

Yeah, it's like, not really. You're all on top of me. We gotta snuggle. You're, you're sitting down, mom. Boom. You know, truly, truly. So, you know. But my feminine has gotten stronger and more present because she gets fed and so she just cannot wait. You know, she is looking forward to October because that's my fallow time too. It's like she is just like, when do we get to October? And the other thing is when you're tending children, sometimes that corresponds with illnesses, which again, I think of that as time. It's wonderful if I don't have that much scheduled so I can really be with them. I think it's a real honor to get to tend them and tend their bodies. And again, that takes a spaciousness and it's the unsung heroine, you know, doing that for the children. But you think of what difference that makes in society when little ones are tended, when they don't feel well, when they need that care. And it's one of the most important jobs that we can do because then those beings will be compassionate and they will give that compassion back.

In your book you were also talking, which I love the idea of in our culture, which is the non linear or the linear where we're very measuring and it's numbers and it's, you know, and I'm into this stuff, I count my steps on how much I walk and you know, I like these things. But you also made like. It was like one chapter you were talking about that and the other chapter, it was about really checking in, like, oh, wow, how does my spirit feel? Like, how does my body feel? And just talk a little bit about that, because I think it's so powerful in the midst of all of us trying to accomplish and optimize our lives that we miss that.

Well, and I think part of it is there's that desire of kind of like validation. You know, not only did I accomplish something, but am I creating something of value? Is it? You know, and that's what that counting is about. I think it's like wanting to sort of add it all up and make something. So part of that is. And there's validity in that, and I think it's just maybe changing the value system a little bit. So I do this with myself. I do this with my kids. You know, there are creations. We do create things. I'm creating books, for example, and, you know, they're creating art projects. But I try to get them to come step back for a couple reasons to the process. Process of creating. So for me, when I write a book, for example, there is the book. And I feel glad to have that as a resource that people can pick up. But I back up and look at the process of what I'm going through when I'm creating that, and that process is just as valuable to me as the book. And so if we can kind of look at that as a measure, those are those more holistic questions. You know, how did I feel in that experience? What happened for me in working on those questions? You know, what did I learn when I was like, for me, when I was delving into these questions about wild creativity? So I do that a lot with my kids, too. I'm trying to get them to think broader than the product, because the products are a finite thing of time. And the problem with that, you know, you can go, ha, I achieved that goal. And then it's. Then you're on staircase again, just a treadmill, really. But if you can be in the process of it, that's a whole different measure that can help you, you know, tune into something that measures things. Certainly it measures like, are you growing? You know, have you learned something since that last time? What have you learned? Those things are. They're not linear measurements, but they're measurements that can help us hold on to something. We can start to feel like, yes, what I'm doing is valuable now, if it feels like it isn't. Like when I used to work at the hospital as a physical therapist, and I left that because of my Son. Because I wanted to have more flexibility, not knowing where I would go with that. But what I can say now is that my measurements of my understanding of progress is so much different than it would have been then. Then it might have been a promotion or a salary level or the tasks I was given, whereas now it's more about, where are my dreams? What state are my dreams? Am I giving time to those dreams? Am I getting enough time with my family that's unscheduled? How is their creative flow? Because I'm a mother, they're like my little company. So I pay attention to that. You know, where is their creative flow? Where's the creative? Rather than the stock market? I'm looking at, you know, how is the creative flow for each child? And are they accessing it? Are they feeding it? And how can I support that being fed? You know? So those are the measurements I'm using. And I talk, too, in the book about that process I have where I choose five to seven creative goals every year. And I think that's an important thing, to sort of give some form, because there is also the potential with this dreamy, creative energy that you never form anything or you never feel like anything's formed. And so I do set intentionally five to seven goals every year that I check once or twice a month. So I write them usually in about February. So you pick a time of year. And I feel goals in different parts of my life. So with my partnership with my mothering, with my business, with my personal creativity. And I write them out as fully as I can, and then I check them once or twice a month, and I keep them all year long. And then I have a little ritual at the end of that year when I go through the full cycle, and I look at where did I get movement on those goals, and where did I maybe not get as much? And was that what I wanted? Or, you know, and I just do a whole assessment process of it that's probably more holistic than linear, but that is a more masculine process of going through goal setting and then looking at them through the seasons.

But do you also, like, organize it, or you just set the intentions and kind of let the feminine flow? Or do you, like, set specific tasks to get done in those certain bigger goals?

A little bit of both, I would say. If I had more time, which with three children, there's different. Only so many slices of the pie. So I mostly focus on the annual goals, and I check on them every month because then they're in my consciousness. But what happens, I Find is then an opportunity pops up and I go, oh, that kind of meets one of my intentions. So I say yes to it or I say no more easily than having to track. Like a lot of things can get thrown at you and it's like, what is making anything? What is doing anything? Is that worth my time? Is that. And I do think you have to be a fairly strong guardian of your time, especially if you want to be creative and have a family. And you know, there are different aspects. I mean, there's a writer that lives down the street from me who has no children and he really can delve into his creative writing field a lot more than I can because I'm also tending these other beings. So part of it is your choices that you're making. But at the same time, with three children, I still make priority for being creative and having that creative channel for myself. And so because of that, I'm careful about what I say yes to. But having those intentions will often alert me sooner because they're fresh in my energy field and my mind and my consciousness, so I'm more clear. And then usually monthly, I also sit down and kind of track what are the important things for this month. And I do make a little list of those. But I also am not hard on myself if they don't happen because sometimes, very often I'll have an unexpectedly sick child or something. That's my thing that tends to go. Because when you're tending three children over 20 years time, a lot happens, A lot happens. And they also have healthcare appointments and things like that. So I don't, I guess I'm not rigid about it. But at the same time I do have a loose organization with it to help me track what I'm doing. But I would say I only go out about a month with that. I mean, have my annual goals. But on that more specific level, I really only go out about a month because I feel like I have to be close enough to the energy field of that time frame to know what, you know, how the, how the spirit is going to be meeting me with the environment that's happening. And that's what is making my plan. So I guess spirit is part of that planner, you know.

Yeah, that's so great. I love that, the being guardian, the guardian of your time too, like to really, I mean, I feel the same way and just that you have to be very intentional if you're gonna actually bring creative into the form, you know, to really truly do it. And it's. I'm not a naturally Organized person. I've been working on this for a while. So it's taken me. It's taken, like, yeah, I'm not one of those people. Like, yeah, here I go. Super organized. Whatever. It's been a process.

Seems so organized to me. So that might be your internal feeling, but I think what you show to the world is that you're holding a lot with it. You have a pretty amazing structure. Yeah. And I.

It's been a. I mean, it's been intentional process. But you asked my college roommates about my room in college. They'd be like, what? She's organized. And now everything is organized in my house. I'm not anal, but I'm very organized. Yes, but thank you. I mean, it's been. It's been a work in progress.

Well, that's the other thing is, I think being patient with these things. You know, it's like you, that. That's the craft of creativity is you. You grow it over time and you get good at it over time, whatever.

Right.

Yeah.

That's a good reminder on the learning process that we can. We can learn. You can go from a messy college room to a Zen home. It's possible. That's awesome. I love that. Very cool. So I'm wondering, what about, like, resistance? Do you. How do you work with, like, creative blocks or resistance? Like, you have this, oh, hey, I've gonna do this idea and I'm on it. And then all of a sudden you're like, I'm not on it.

Yeah. Oh, I got. Yeah, that's a good one. Because it's like childbirth. And many of these creative things are not unlike birthing. When you bring. Especially when you bring your soul energy into something and you really move it through your field. So most births, you do hit edges of resistance, where the. And all that is, is your. Your potential is expanding. And so when it's expanding, it's going to take some adjustment. And that feeling, being able to stay with that feeling without getting afraid of it or walking back from it. I talk about this a lot again with my kids and also in myself. I know this to be true. Whenever you take on something really big, you will get these resistance layers. And so not to pay attention too much to those layers, know that that's part of the process and just keep moving. So I'll give you a. This is kind of a big example of it, but I'll give this to you. So my family and I had a dream of creating an ocean retreat, a place where we would go, and it had Been on my dream seed list for years. And I thought maybe when we're older, I don't know. I couldn't imagine doing it now with three kids. But this opportunity came up through a lot of intention, setting and intuition coming together. And I tell the full story in Wild Creative. So I won't go into that right now, but this opportunity came up and it was this neglected but beautiful cabin about two blocks from the ocean in Oregon. And so my husband and I bought it and took on the job of contracting this house that had had very little running water in. Had basically the water went out to a pipe in the front yard and landed in the yard. And, you know, so there was a lot to take on in the construction. Well, what was interesting is I felt this incredible, almost anxiety once we signed the papers on it in my body. And it was resistance. And I know this from going through things. But this was a big dream of our families and it kind of felt beyond our capacity, especially if you think about the stories we make up in our heads about a family of three children and just the expenses we already have there. So I was going against sort of a big, almost lineage pattern too, of scarcity. You know, can you do this? Is that possible? So I was stretching big, and the result was I felt like I was. I mean, I was just like shaking my whole body. So what you do when you pick a big thing and a real big drink comes through, and it happens lots of ways and little things too, but this was a big one. So the equivalent resistance was also big. It was very uncomfortable. So I went outside to ground the energy. I did the rituals that I know how to do. I talked to Spirit, so I handed it over. You know, if I'm going to allow Divine to create with me, I'm also going to hand over the intensity of the resistance to. And not run away from it. Not think, in my case, part of this, when you go on these deeper dreams manifesting, it's like, is this a sign that we shouldn't be doing this? That's a question, right? But the way I sort that out and I talk about this in Wild Creative is when I would get into my center, I felt a complete flow towards the project. It was like, there is a flow here. So I trusted that flow. I didn't feel like a stop, like, no, I need to stop. You know, it was more like, I'm quaking like this, but I feel a flow. So I trusted that. And I just thought, we will just walk one step at a time with this House. It took us a couple months. We did all this contracting. We definitely ran into things we didn't expect. It's an old hundred year old cottage. But then, so it was last October that we finished this project. We went and moved furniture in and stayed there for the first time as a family. We were going to use this as a vacation rental too. So we're kind of setting up a whole business with it. We went there and we came to the house and it was just this beautiful fall, warm, gorgeous day. As we moved in the furniture, I looked up in the sky and there were all these lanterns, like hand lanterns that people light rising up into the sky, totally starlit sky. Next morning we woke to the most beautiful light dancing across the walls and then went out walking as a family on the beach. It was magical, truly magical. And my son, you know, we spent the day just wandering and I felt like I was in a dream. And my youngest son said, this is the best day ever. I said, I know. And it's just so, you know, that's what it looks like. And we have to know that if we're going to step, expand, just like birthing, you know, that's the point of birthing where you're like, I can't do this anymore. Someone else is there to say, I'm with you. That's where we also have to know in creativity that it's part of that too. When you're bringing something in. Trust the journey, trust the ride and then. But don't let the resistance stop you or stop your path. Get support if you need, by all means, get the bodywork, get the friend coming in. Talk to your partner, do the rituals, do the energy pieces, move the resistance and then come to the other side of the expansion and see what you've created.

Yeah, just, just feeling that resistance then going into like getting that deep yes. You know, we all have that. Either it's a deep yes or it's a deep no. And then being willing to move through that is, that's the game.

Part of having a creative practice is having an intuitive where you learn to listen to your intuition. Because if you're going to take the wild creative path and start making your life by hand, there isn't sign. Sometimes you're making your own trail. And so knowing how to read the signs, because there are a lot of signs that can come in synchronicity. And so it's partially, it's learning to navigate in that old way where you're reading these deeper signs that are coming your way.

It just feels magical. Like just, you know, like being on a magical adventure.

Isn't that what it is? It really is. And it's the magical child too, who dares to dream. The one who says this is possible and then lives into the possibility. That's great.

So what about failing? Failing and what that can bring up or, you know, I mean, we can bring shame into this or however you want to talk about it, but just how do we navigate, you know, these creative dreams? And then also some don't happen and we fail or.

Right, yeah. First, I think talking about that word failure is really important because again, are we, what measure are we using for failure? You know, so is it the linear trajectory? And part of it is redefining failure. Now, what does failure mean? Like, when I first was trying to get Wild Feminine published, I got an amazing agent in New York that picked it up and then it didn't go through. He sent it out to a large batch of women publishers. He specifically went to the women and the women really not only rejected it, but had a strong reaction to it. And it went out the night I went to labor with my second son. So I was in the mid. I was birthing twins. And here I was in this mystical experience of bringing in this being through my body, through the doorway, through the sacredness that this womb, space and body is this pelvic doorway. And I'm writing about it. And those in charge of the publishing world, and in this case they were women, could not receive it. Like the door could not have been more shut. And it was deeply, I grieved deeply. Not only, you know, I found out about this, I had intuition about it and I kind of could sense it. But I was like, maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm just second guessing. But then we got the no's and here I was. Then I had a baby. And so I had this little two week old when I finally got the this is a no. And it felt like a failure. But part of it is, what are we using as failure? I mean, here it was, I wasn't going to get the yes that would bring this book forward. So for me, this is an example of a project, if you will, that wasn't going to get the opening. So I went to the wild. And this is, you know, I tell this story in Wild Creative, but I think going to a place where you get contact with spirit, wherever that is. For me, it was, I go to nature and I went to this place when my sons were older. First I grieved a lot. And when something doesn't go in the manner, especially when you're working on a soul project, you have to grieve what you thought would happen and then what actually happened. So I thought I was going to get this incredible support. I thought, I have two young children. How will I ever get this book written? I'm going to get the support I need. No, didn't happen. Still have two young children. Still have this project that I feel is essential not only for the women who might read it, but for these children. I think that was the biggest grief for me is how am I going to tell my child to live their dreams when I can't get this forward? And when I'm talking about the sacredness that we are and it's not being recognized in the outer world, what does that signal? So that was a pretty big fail, fail sign. But again, you grieve what you thought would happen. So I cried and I really. I talked about it and I set it down and I did ritual. But then I gathered my little bundles, my little baby bundles back up, and I went trudging out to the river's edge where it meets the ocean, in my case. And I cried out to Spirit and I tell the full story in Wild Creative. But what happened was I ended up. An eagle flew down and kind of met us by the water's edge. And it wasn't just the eagle. What happened in that moment was I felt entirely connected to the landscape. I felt at one in this moment with the landscape, with my children, with the water, with the sand, with all that. And that was the answer. So the other thing is we have to be open. And once we grieve, to cry out, it's okay to cry out to Spirit and say what? This is not what I was planning. Are you on my side or what? I had a few choice words there, but I think that's when you go into those heart spaces and then you receive the message that comes back. So it may not be the message you want. And that's the other thing, is we have to learn how to open our receivers and receive and just take what we receive. So in that moment, I received the validation that there was a oneness that I was part of that I was being held. And then I got this download of this class called Realigning with the Great Mother. It was just sort of a whole knowledge, and it was kind of a story in a class. And I wrote it down after being at the water, and then I ended up teaching it. And the signal I kept Getting was write and teach, write and teach. Well, that wasn't what I was asking about. I was asking about this book. Excuse me. And so, you know, but if I hadn't been open to receive the what I got, I can now say in hindsight, because hindsight's 20 20, right. I wasn't ready to write Wild Feminine. I didn't have enough experience over the long haul. And if I'd gotten that first to a book, to etc. It would have been in 2003 when my second one was born. And actually it took until 2008 for me to really have a completed manuscript that was full of all I had learned from all those women during that time. So I don't think the information was ready. I don't think I was ready. And so sometimes there's a reason why things are going a different route or a different path that you may only be able to look back on. But the number one thing is not to lose hope and to keep that dialogue going with whatever you, you know, whatever you call it. But for me, I call it spirit, that divine essence that infuses all life, that I do believe responds not in the same way we might didn't say, oh, this is going to be the pathway forward for you, or I'm sorry, that didn't happen. You know, it just, it was more like, here's the information, now sit with it. And I had to be patient and I did follow what I received. And so I think part of that failure is re examining what were you expecting? Expecting and then, you know, spending time in grieving that having some ritual time where you start to converse with that divine essence that you are and then asking for what the next step is and following that and see where it leads you.

I love that you the write and teach like that was your guidance. And you're like, wait a minute, what are you talking about? I'm talking about this book. Like how many of us, we have those experiences of like, oh, do this. And you're like, no, I'm. This is what I'm doing.

And we all, in different ways, you know, for some women, it's that partner, that love partner searching and searching and that person's not coming up feeling loved, you know, and then another woman might struggle with having fertility. She wants that child. And it's just that not coming and not coming. And for another person, it might be a creative project like I had with a book where I had this idea and I felt it was very vital. And it is and it has been and it gone on to go around the world, but it's not coming forward in the way I thought, nor am I getting the support I think I need to complete it. So all of these things, we have sort of our own agenda and expectations. So part of it is dismantling that a little bit and just getting down to the bare layer and not losing hope, though, you know, I still kept piping up about what I was trying to do, but, you know, I learned to be more patient and to listen more than give what I thought I was doing.

I love that. I love that it took you that long for it to kind of manifest into the world. I think it's so great because we're. Which is awesome. We're really into productivity and like making stuff happen and getting it done. And it took me three weeks to write my book. And I just love that you this just a beautiful reminder of like, not yet. Like, it wasn't a no. It was just, you have more work to do.

Right, right. And the other thing, you know, I was internally very frustrated for sure. But there was one thing, and I think looking for signs too, because at that point, I didn't know enough to read the signs. Part of what I hope these books help people with, like Wild creative, Wild Feminine mother and Primary center is how to read the signs so they don't have the struggle that maybe I did. But in that moment, you know, I really struggled. Like, is this even valuable spirit? Are you trying to tell me just a shift shelve this thing? And I was sort of in that space and one woman happened to ask me in my community, so what is it you do? You know, I do this work for women, but I would, you know, I kind of had this huffy, like I'm trying to write this book, but she said, really, could I look at it? Could I look at what you've written? And at that point, you know, it was just like the beginnings of a manuscript. It had some chapters and. And I said, you would want to read it. And she said, yes. And I gave it to her. And she was one person. And I realized then that if it was one, if it would benefit one woman, then it would be worth me doing because it would change relationship with her body. And so that one person, you know, it's like, how big is enough? What? Yes is enough. That was enough to go, oh, okay. And it was good that I couldn't necessarily see that it would take that long. But now I also am far more patient than I was then. It's like it took till 2008 to self publish it. It was 2011 when a publisher picked it up and put it out.

Wow.

Long time. You know, that was really about a decade of time from the time I started writing it.

That's awesome. That's very cool. I love that. And I think it is important. I love that too. What you said, if it was going to impact one. Because I think we can get wrapped up if, you know, if it's not gonna impact thousands or millions or, you know, you're not doing great work or something. And it's like, no, you are right. And I also love, because it's. You were talking about earlier imperfection, you know, like embracing the journey that I think sometimes we have these ideas of what we want to do and then we think we should already be perfect and be like master author or whatever it is without the growth process.

Yes. Well, I think those models are out there. We don't see in a more feminine model is this slower, more sustained process. And for me, I wouldn't trade the journey that I had then of writing all that time, all that I learned, all that growth that happened, that made me who I was, that developed my energy field. And so in the end, I did have a product to show for it. My oldest son just came home. Hi, honey. Did Zach haven't. I'll talk to you. And it's one of my beauties right now, yet the process was worth so much. That process was invaluable to honor that process.

I love that you really, it feels like you just really honored that process. And I think we all have different phases. I mean, I'm currently in the phase of honoring my motherhood journey. And it's a process, you know, I've been in it for two years almost now, and it's like still unfolding. And I would imagine it's gonna continue to unfold, but like to embrace that, that there is no there. Okay, I got it all figured it out. It's done right?

Boom. Done right. No end point. Really. Yeah. And I think that was. When I look back on what I thought I was thinking that there was this endpoint. And now I really see not only even if you're doing whatever product, if we think a creation, a child, a book, a business, a partnership, they're continually evolving and growing and you're changing and time is changing. And so it's this evolution and this long term dynamic that is really what it's about.

And to use your word, the tending necessary for all, all of it. You know, I Was thinking about partnership, like, once you get married or whatever, it's not like, oh, we're married and happily ever after. It's like, you have to tend that, that partnership fire, otherwise it's gonna go away.

Yeah. At the end of Wild Creative, I have this wheel, wheel of creativity where I'm talking about, because again, I think we think of creativity in terms of maybe one art form or something. And if we think about it across the breadth of life and the flow of it, then I encourage people to look at, like, how is my partnership doing? How is my personal relationship with my body? How is my creative vitality? What is my work life like? What is my spiritual life like? You know, all those various avenues and looking at the creative flow in there. Because ideally you have a strong flow in each area. And when you don't, it might be time to shift some creative energy that way and get more creative, to get some inspiration and some fuel and fire going in there.

And do you recommend looking at that periodically? Just like checking in a couple times throughout the year? What do you think?

I think so. I mean, I like to do things seasonally too. So I sit down and choose my dream seeds for the year. I look at that wheel and I think about. I also think about the year I just came through. And I think about, okay, what got tended, what didn't, what might need a little bit more, you know, what needs a little bit more excitement or nourishment or just attention. And I set my dream seeds based on that. And then I also think just checking periodically, when you pull those out, if you feel like, particularly if you're not feeling like the flow is happening in your life, it's a good time to pull that back out and just see, am I getting stuck in a few places or maybe I need to put a little more attention in this area. Like body health is one. I think people often doing their work and they're maybe more sedentary. And then, so if you're feeling like you're not feeling very creative, very vital, maybe you need to spend a little bit of time with just attention to the body, just nourishing the body, because that will deepen that creative flow. If you feel alive and vital, your creative flow is going to be stronger. So it's a good time, especially when you're feeling maybe things aren't flowing as well, to take a look and see what's happening, get that bird's eye view.

Of your creative, like, take a nap. That's what I found. You know, rather than like Working or like doing something. It's like, hold on, just go take a flippin nap. This is not the time to be doing this.

You know, I talk about a lot of business practices and I really. You were talking about that. Lean in, lean back. You know, I do think that we do more for ourselves when we lean back and rest or deep lean or take a bath or go out and put a blanket, my favorite. Put a blanket down, lie on the earth, you know, just be there, stare at the clouds, just be for a little bit that unplugging that, that time of just rest really does refill. And that's when you often will get in inspiration. It's not like you're losing time by doing that. I mean, some of my best inspirations come when I go into that space.

That spaciousness and it feels sometimes counterintuitive. Right? I mean, you know, like you think, oh, I have so much to do, I'm not going to go lay on a blanket and be in nature. You know, like.

So it's interesting when I'm feeling crunched and it is counterintuitive when I look at my plate and I look at my, you know, whatever list I've got going on and I think, oh my goodness, I have so much to do. I've got to go lie on the earth for a little bit. That's again, that sort of counter. But I think it really does help if we will set it all down for five minutes even and just go into that space where we can really deeply nourish our wells. Then we come back more efficient, you.

Know, and you can just get things done faster. I've noticed whether I'm tired trying to do something and then I make mistakes and then I get frustrated and it's like I should have just taken a nap. So I'm curious, you know, you talk about a lot about and we'll do the last question, then we can wrap up. But you talk a lot about ritual and connecting to spirit. Do you have like, you know, the modern world, a lot of women are busy and there's. You can get disconnected. How do you guide women in creating this ritual and finding their connection to source and their connection through spirit throughout the day so that they don't get to the end of the day and they're like, oh, I'm exhausted, I can't even move.

Yeah, well, first I think it takes, you know, maybe on a weekend when someone has a little more time to actually figure out when is the best time for a ritual. When can you actually Fit that in. And to me, there's big rituals and there's smaller rituals. You know, I think having access to both. So one of my favorite smaller rituals, my personal is just my cup of tea that I have in the afternoon. And I have it every afternoon. And I promise, I always make a promise to myself that I will drink it while it's warm because it's symbolic of the tending other people and not tending self. Do, do, do, do, do. There's my cold cup. So. And there are times when that happens. And I remake the tea, actually, because I feel like that's my promise to myself that in whatever busy day, I will at least get a few minutes of time where I'm quiet, where I'm present, I'm present. With the sensation I'm present. I often will take it as a meditation. Look outside, pay attention, or see what my inner state is. How am I feeling? What do I need at that moment? And it's just my own personal meeting check in time, you know, that little ritual. And that's a time where you're connecting with that deep self. That deep self connects to spirit. So some sort of ritual, whether it's a morning walk or, you know, a morning cup of tea, afternoon cup of tea, or just a sitting time, or it can be. Even if you have a child and you're walking them to school, it can be on your way back, you know, walk your child to school and then very intentionally walk back and just kind of check in with yourself. It's important to fit this in where you already can, you know, in your. In your structure. And there are times when we have more spaciousness and times when we have less. So, you know, one of the rituals I did for myself when I had my third child is I promised myself I would write one line in a journal every day for his first year. And that became a time for me when I got just this quiet, sweet meditation of just this is my time, you know. And when I look back on that writing, a lot of it is about being tired in different poetic language, which is how I was feeling. But I made that space for myself. So whatever it is, you know, there is. There is enough time for a little space and then have some other rituals that are bigger that help you connect, whatever those. You know, one of our family favorites is going to the ocean. We like to go and really deepen into the energy field that's there. I will bring my drum and drum. I'll just walk, you know, there's make a fire. So just having space for that, a favorite one that I have at home that I do is from one of my teachers, Rosita Arvigo. In the Maya tradition, where you gather herbs in your yard, or you can gather them on your walk or in the park, but just some simple herbs like cedar, rosemary are good ones. Roses are always good, lavender. And you take them and you ask for the blessing of the plant and put that into the water, and then you squeeze it into the water and you ask for what you need. And just even that process of asking, you get more in touch with where you're at, you know, and so you're asking for that, and, like, may I be blessed, may be protected, may I have more rest, May we have more peace in our home, whatever is needed. Then you set the water outside for about an hour, and then you come back, and one more time you do that prayer. It's a conversation with spirit, really. And then you take the water and you go around the home and you spritz it, kind of like bird's bath, you know, the way that you don't actually bathe in it. You spritz it all around your energy field. So you flick it and you go around the home and do all the doorways, entries, exits, everyone. I do the animals, everybody. And then it's a cleansing. So it's a very simple ritual, but it's amazing how it can kind of clarify. And I just encourage people to take that and try it and see what happens. So that's a bigger ritual, and you have a little bit more time. But on the weekend, maybe you're tending the house. Add that in. My children all know how to make it, and so helpful to have those things in your back pocket.

I love it. And I love with your children, too. I've, in the last month, started doing. It's not sage, but it's some sort of cleansing incense stick. But he loves to do it. And we walk around, we light it, and he holds it, and he says, bless, bless. So we bless everything. And it's, like, super simple. But it's a beautiful way for me to just connect to spirit and also to. To do with him. Like, and he loves to do it. It's so sweet.

Well, I think when you have those tangible, simple things, pick those up naturally, and then maybe they'll have space for them in their lives when they need to drop down. They know how to do it because.

You set that up right, which I love about you in your work of just, like, how important that is to create that for your children. You know, to really create the spaciousness for their true creative spirit to thrive. And that part of that is ritual and. And slowing down and not being busy. So I acknowledge you. I appreciate you. I'm honored to know you. I love your books.

It's always such a pleasure to talk with you.

So can you share where people can find more about you, buy your books, learn about your classes and your training?

Yes, yes. So my website is wildfeminine.com just like the first book that did make it to press eventually. Yay.

The Feminine is Rising.

Yes. And so that is here. That website is there. And I just want to say I really do believe the feminine is rising. And so that, you know, with that, it. It's when we tune into our own feminine field and our own creative field, then we can actually, I think that's where the next phases of work and life are going to come from. So I just encourage everyone to. To translate that for themselves. And these books on my website, Wild Feminine, Wild Creative Mothering from youm center, are there to help you, to help guide that process, help you translate for yourself. Because everyone has this. It's just a matter of knowing how to speak the language and read the signs that we have. So that's on the website. And then I also teach holistic pelvic care and holistic pelvic energy for providers, all kinds of providers. And that information is on my website, too. This fall, I'll have people coming from Mexico and Australia. I can't remember if I already said that, but international crew coming in. I'm so excited. I'm so excited that this medicine is spreading and I'm sitting here being able to tend my children, which is where my heart is.

I love that. You know, in the beginning of your book, you said you were a mother and a healer, and I just was like, I had such a strong, like, yes, I see that in you. And also like, yes, that's awesome. Like really claiming that in the world and being that.

Yes. And I think the more that we claim that, the better. Because every single person came in from a mother. You know, the state of that relationship varies. But as we honor and make more hold of feminine, then we have to honor that space and what it really means. I mean, I think of it as the one. To me, mother is the tender of the spirit door.

That is some work. That's some holy work. Yeah, that's beautiful. Awesome. Well, thank you so much. Lots of love.

Love to you and your babe.

Oh, thank you. We hope you enjoyed this episode of Mama Goddess sending you lots of love and blessings. If you'd like to connect more, go to mamagoddess.com until next time. Keep rocking, rocking it and have an awesome day.