Cocktails & Coaching with guest Kirsty Dunphey

Hello. Hello. Welcome, welcome. Cocktails and Coaching has been resurrected for quarantine. This happened yesterday when I got to the afternoon of my work and I was getting very bored, and I thought, you know what? I need some cocktails and coaching. And then spoke to my gorgeous friend and said, hey, do you want to come on tomorrow night with me? And she said, yes, because we're all in this same situation. And so tonight, who I wanted to bring on, you've probably seen me promoting it out today. So that everyone knows is Kirsty Dunphy. And we have. I mean, we've known each other for a very long time now. I think about 15 or so years. I don't know exactly, but long enough. We travelled to India. We've had Christmas with our families in Finland. I think we've been somewhere else, too. But maybe that was just in my imagination. I'm not sure. But I'm going to bring her on now because she is an amazing money person. And so it wasn't me that asked Kirsty this question, but someone asked a couple of weeks ago when we were on a group zoom call and said, if you could talk about anything a little bit more, what would it be? And she said, money. And so that's what we're going to talk about tonight because she's a great money person. So, Kirsty, Hi. Are you coming on? Here we go. Oh, where's your camera gone? Oh, she's disappeared. She's dropped off. We tested this before, it all worked perfectly and now she's dropped off. So I will talk to you while we wait for Kirsty to come back on. So tonight I have an Espresso quarantini. So that's what I've called my martini tonight. Here's Kirsty. She's back. There you are. Hi.

The panic when your Internet connection cuts out just as you're about to be introduced. Sorry, I had a small panic. I feel like every human thing is on the Internet in the world at the moment right now, so I'm paying the price for it here.

We're competing now with people watching Netflix, not people working, so I don't know what's worse, but. So I was just telling everyone I've got my espresso quarantini tonight. What are you drinking now?

I'm glad you asked. I thought I'd do a little brand wrapping for Tasmanian gin. At the same time, I've brainwashed a lot of my clients into knowing what I like to drink, so I get all the gin in the world instead of wine now, which is great because I'm not growing up enough for wine. So this is Sudpo. Lt's Antarctic dry gin. It's Tasmanian gin. It's one of my favorites. We have lots of good gin down here, and I'm not sure you've tried that one. I can see the UV in your eyes.

Yeah, yeah. You know, I've got a similar thing. So everyone knows that I love ink gin. Well, people that I work with know I love Inkjee, and I. I drink it probably more than you should drink in gin. But then at Christmas, I got 13 bottles of ink gin, and I was like, anyway, I'm still not sick of it. I still love it.

So happy Christmas to you. I know, right?

Let me know what are you drinking? So I can see you in the comments there. So Carla's got. I'm loving the look of that espresso martini Quar. It's my Quarantini. Two favorites. Ali's tagging people to get on there. Oh, Grace says, long time no see. That's because Grace left my house about 30 minutes ago from coming to say hi. But what are you drinking? Let me know in the comments what you're drinking. Okay, so I will start. Kirsty, I gave you a little bit of an introduction that didn't really introduce you at all. Can you do your proper introduction for what you would like to be known as tonight? Because you could be known as many, many different things.

Well, there was actually, there was this moment where I had to put in my name at the bottom of the thing, and I've been doing all these zoom chats at the moment, and every now and then I would change my name to something tongue in cheek. And I thought, no, no, better actually put your name as opposed to, like.

Kirsty Gin Connoisseur, when people have. I didn't tell you to put your right name in because I knew it would come up on the screen. And I thought, oh, my gosh, I better tell Kirsty that because you're likely to write something really embarra embarrassing and not realize it goes out to everybody. So I'm glad that you stuck with your name.

I'm glad that you've known me for long enough to know that where there's a chance to embarrass myself, I will. That's great. How do I want people to know me? I am a proud Tasmanian and I'm a mom of two girls, and I'm a longtime friend and fan of yours. For work, I'M a mortgage broker. I've written a book a very long time ago, which actually, we're going to have to find some way because I think if I'm. If I'm right, then I can do some sort of an exciting giveaway for anyone that's watching tonight. So I'm going to send out some fun and games. So maybe we'll explain to people how they can email me their details at the end of this and I will just send them a gift for being cool and listening to us tonight.

Yes, I love it. So throughout tonight, we've got quite a few people on already, but feel free. You've got in the comments bar there, just ask any question that comes up going through because I'll flash them up on the screen so that we can answer them as we're going. The first most important question Charlotte has asked is it's 11am in the UK. Too early for gym.

Is that a question? Isolation, quarantine time.

Far out. Carla's got one. That's okay, we'll let it slide. We'll let it slide. We'll send you some gym colour. Okay? Hi, Fiona. Hi, Alison, how are you? All right, so use that comment box. Ask Kirsty any questions as we're going. But, Kirsty, so when you were asked the question, what would you talk to women about more if you could, and you said money, why is that?

I feel like especially, I know we've got. We've got someone in the UK here, and maybe it's not exactly the same in the uk, but here in Australia, it's not very culturally appropriate to talk about money. And yet it's something that all of us have to contend with. We all struggle with it at times, we all splurge, we all waste, we all save. You know, we all are dealing with money all the time. And so for me, I would love for it to become more and more part of what we feel comfortable talking about as a nation and especially as women. I feel like without money, there's so many things that we want in life that are difficult or not possible. And I'm someone who grew up in a family who at times had money and at times had no money, no car, no house. And so I know what it's like to have it both ways, as I know you do as well. And there's one that I would choose. And one of the ways to, I guess, encourage more money into our lives is to understand it better and to talk about it is one way to understand it.

Yeah, that's what I would do. I mean, I find you intriguing anyway, but I've always found you. One of the most intriguing things about you is I do love talking about money. I like. I'm very curious about it and I want to learn more. And you're always very open about it, which I like. But one of the things that I learned when we traveled together for the first time, which we went to India in 2017.

Something like that. Yeah, I remember it was a January.

Yes. And I would always class you as a wealthy woman. I don't know if in your definition that's what you would class yourself, but I would say, you know what, she's quite a wealthy woman. And then we travel together. And ladies. Because everyone, we've got Peter here as well. So, ladies and gentlemen, this lovely wealthy woman reuses her tea bags and takes them along with her.

You're not even going to mention I take the soap with me from hotels as well. I haven't bought soap in over a decade. I use soap. I don't want that to be out there. That Kirsty doesn't use soap. No, I'm frugal and I'm proud of it.

Yes, you are. And I find it hilarious and I find it adorable. But so what I wanted to. The reason I brought that up was to segue into going, you were very successful at a very young age. Can you kind of explain what happened there? And was it conscious? Did you fluke into it? How did you learn about it? And what am I talking about when I say you were that. Hang on, let me. Before you go into that brilliant answer, we'll just say hi to Victoria. She's got raspberry vodka and Prosecco cocktail. That is good. Peter forgot to buy some. He's got to Uber. These times that we're in and Victoria is saying what to you? So how did that. How did your journey of wealth begin?

My journey of wealth began at a really young age watching my parents, actually. It's kind of a corny and a bit of a daggy story, but I grew up as a little kid wanting to be exactly like my parents when I grew up, because they were rock stars in my eyes. They both had normal, everyday jobs. Dad was in the Navy, my mum was a bookkeeper. And they had what today would be called called a side hustle. No one had ever heard of that phrase in the early 80s, but my parents were out there side hustling. And so they had a Laundromat, they had investment properties, they had a petrol station they had a shortbread business at one stage. We had a thousand year old duck egg business. Not our most successful family business, but they were always trying stuff. And they got to a stage actually when they were in their 30s where they could retire and not have to work anymore. And it was through their sort of entrepreneurial endeavors. They left their standard jobs, they went out, they worked hard. I got my work ethic from them, very much so at a young age. But they, they were kind of my role models and I wanted to be exactly like them when I grew up. And so when you're a kid and you're trying to be entrepreneurial, you get it, but you don't get it. And so I remember very clearly, like I, I would hear people talk about making money, so I tried to legitimately make my own money. One day I tried to melt down metal in my mum's saucepan. And I was like, I'm gonna cast this, I'm gonna make my own money. So I tried all sorts of things. I veered a bit into the dodgy area as well. Like when my parents had a roadhouse, I was quite good at arithmetic and I would add up people's, you know, chocolate bar and water and I would just add on 20 cents for myself as I told them the total at a young age. And then I would spend that on video games. But I think my favorite, my favorite young entrepreneurial endeavor, again, it veers towards the dodgy side. It's my favorite story. Peter, who's hopefully ubering in some, you know, some drinks, is gonna have heard this a million times. But when I was really young, I wanted, not money, but I wanted the stuff that kids really want. I wanted toys and my friends and cake. And so I thought I'd throw myself a birthday party and I hand wrote invitations. And even then I understood the concept of thinking big. So I didn't just invite everyone in my class, I invited everyone in my entire grade four classes. I think I was grade one or so at the time. Then my party day arrived and I got dressed in my beautiful party dress and I waited, you know, that excitement and anticipation. And the doorbell rang and I ran to the door, threw it open, there was my first party guest, parent behind them, big present in their hands. I was super excited because it was my first proper business plan. It had paid off, it had yielded the fruit that I wanted it to yield. And then my mom came up behind me and she was like, who's this? What's going on? Because I hadn't told her that I was throwing myself a birthday party, and it was also October, and my birthday stays in March.

You're naughty.

Okay, I was quite naughty. I'm still a little bit naughty, but I'm not naughty like that anymore. And thankfully, as you get older, you develop ethics and morals and all of those sorts of things. So I got all of my. My cheekiness in the business context out at an early age. But basically, I grew up just wanting to be just like them. I wanted to be entrepreneurial, and I wanted to be everything that my parents were until I no longer did. And for some people, that would be like a rebellious sort of teenage streak. I definitely had a little bit of a rebellious teenage streak, but instead of rebelling against what my parents were, I rebelled against what we sort of became as a family because we went through really, really rough financial times. There's a lot of backstory to it, but basically my parents sort of raised me as sometimes like a third adult in the family. So I was kind of aware as things were going badly for us financially, they spoke to me about it. I understood what was happening. I understood that the businesses that they'd left with other people running them weren't going well.

I understood they spoke honestly to you about it.

It's made me who I am, but I know that I parent my kids now slightly differently to that. So I don't know, it was probably a lot for me to contend with, but again, it's made me the person that I am. But over the course of maybe a few months, maybe a few years, I don't know, it's hard to know. It was sort of my teenage years, so you don't remember everything exactly, but both my parents, they lost everything. They went bankrupt, they divorced, we lost our house, we lost our car, we lost everything. And so then I switched from wanting to be just like my parents, wanting to be very entrepreneurial, to wanting to be nothing like them. And so I went out and I got a standard job, the job in an ice cream shop, which was very exciting for me. I also got a job in a real estate agency. And then I got drawn back into entrepreneurship not too long after that, because I think once it's in your blood, once you grow up with that understanding of the entrepreneurial world, it's very hard to sort of shake it. It's almost a bit like a cult. And so I got drawn back into it at the ripe old age of six day.

Yeah, yeah. The ripe old age of 16. And so I think, like a lot of conversations that I have with people, the hardest part is actually getting started and knowing where to start in terms of financial independence and building any sort of wealth or anything along those lines. You did that very, very early. So I'm going to get the statistic wrong, but you will probably know what it is. But there's a very small percentage of Australians own more than three investment properties. It like drops and drops as it goes up. And then there's like 1% that own more than 5 or something like that.

It's a small percentage. I don't know what the exact percentage is. But yeah, as a spawn of my sort of previous iterations has been as a property manager. And yes, the vast majority of property investors have one investment property. You get a small percentage that then go on to two. But three or more investment properties is rare. It's a small group of people, definitely.

And you exceeded that in your early 20s, which is mind blowing. How did you.

It was in Tassie, though. Let's put the caveat out there. I mean, there was a long time in my property investing career where I didn't pay over $100,000 for a property. I remember I went from everything under a hundred thousand and then the next one I bought was 255,000. And my head was exploding like, absolutely at the thought of that. And I had a tenant lined up and it was 255,000. And I'm pretty sure the tenant was lined up to pay 350 a week at stage. So the return was there, but it was just, it was a lot like there's that mental. Everyone has it. There's a mental figure that you, you know, as soon as you cross it in any area of life, whether it's the amount that you've spent on a vehicle or a holiday or something like that, we all have those figures. And for me, I couldn't understand how I would ever spend more than $100,000 on a house. And then one day I did.

Yes. Yeah, that's, that's how all of us know that Kirsty was definitely from Tasmania and not from Sydney, but doing that, like to get, to get started in that. How did you actually first start and then how did you build up and how did you want to build up?

I started slowly and much slower than I could. And this is advice. So I'm a mortgage broker now, so I give this advice to my clients all the time. Just because the bank will give you this much money, it doesn't mean you need to take that much money. So the bank originally Pre approved me for a 90,000, but the bank originally approved me for a $90,000 property and I bought a 31 and a half thousand dollar property and I still own it to this day. Just a tiny little speck of a unit, like if you cough in there you have to leave the room to do it, otherwise it feels crowded. But that was the right move for me at that time and I just started slowly and I lived in most of my properties to begin with and then I'd move on to the next one and it was slightly better or slightly different. At one stage I moved into a hotel complex and owned a few of those units and managed them but then moved back out and it was sort of just like slowly and, and in tiny little manageable steps like for me. And I say this to my clients all the time. No mortgage, no property. Jenny, nothing is worth waking up at 3am and stressing about the debt level that you've got. Life is too short and important to feel like that. So if it doesn't feel comfortable, don't do it. I also know that when you're making these journeys, nothing's ever going to feel 100% comfortable.

Yeah. When you say that it took small steps and that you did them bit by bit, I think at the time it feels like that. But looking back on it you go, wow, you did a lot in that 10 year span from like 18 to 28 was phenomenal how much you grew.

But yes and no. Like, like I feel like anyone that worked in the real estate market in Tasmania in that time that wasn't doing that. I don't, I don't know what they were seeing that I was, you know, I don't know what they weren't saying that I was seeing because for me at that time in Tassie, especially when I started buying, you could get 12, 13% returns on properties. Interest rates were higher than what they are now obviously. But I don't know whether it was my mindset or, I mean I spent a lot of time reading in those days pre kids when I had all the time in the world to read all the time. And I was, I was brainwashed by Jan Summers and Robert Kiyosaki and just anyone reading, anyone writing about property. I loved it. Like I just felt fascinated by it. But because I worked in real estate I would see these opportunities come up all the time. And Tassie was right for the picking then. Yeah.

And so for people buying property now, what is the biggest difference between now and then? And if you know you're wanting to get more into property. What's the best advice that you've got for people there?

The biggest difference between now and then is, I guess we've had a royal commission and we've had a lot more crackdown on, on lending in the last couple of years. So financing properties is not as easy as it once was.

I know, especially mortgage broker, so you know my history. But my first two properties were 110% loans. I mean, those were the days. Those were the days. Now you. Those days are long gone. But now it's, you know, I know last time I tried to get a loan from the bank and I'm going like, what? What do you mean? I can't just say how much I earn and you just give me as much money as I want. Because mine was I was not as smart as Kirsty Young. When they said you could borrow 90,000, I would then buy something for 95 and then argue and try and hustle to find the way to find the extra five. I never, ever went under what the limit was. I always went over the limit. I still go over the limit.

That's why it's good to be friends with people that have different mentalities to you. You and I are similar in lots of ways, but we're also really, really different as well.

And I think savings in the last. You'll be very impressed in this. And this is, this will be a funny story for people. So yesterday I saw there's a dress on Instagram that I've been lusting after for six months, which, you know, Instagram is our. It's not good for compulsive Instagram shoppers like me. But this dress, I've been lusting after, and I see it, the lady wears it like regularly, and I'm like, I love that dress. Anyway, she posted yesterday morning saying, hey, heaps of people always comment on my dress. It's on sale 65% off at J. Crew in the US. I'm like, okay, awesome. So I go on to get it on the Australian site. It's $600. So, okay, this is not fair, but I need to have this dress. And they're saying it's now $95 in the US and in Australia $600. So I'm like, okay, I just need to get it from the US site. So I hooked up a VPN on my computer so that I could order on the LA based site and then it wouldn't accept my Australian credit card, which, because this is the way they stop Australians from buying it. But undeterred, I was. I was like, okay, I must still have this dress. There's got to be a way. And so I ended up hitting up a friend of mine who is in America to not only buy me the dress and six other articles of clothing that I wanted, but also to put it on his credit card and send it to me. So that's commitment, but the whole order saved me $700. There's a story about saving.

I'm not sure you and I think of saving in exactly the same way. And it's interesting. I have conversations with people all the time, and we have this conversation that, you know, spending less is not actually saving. But when you say that, it makes me sad because you and I are only just meant to be getting back from our trip to America that we had planned, that you started on and that I didn't start on and things in J.

For real.

I know, I know.

Guys, if you've got any questions as we go through. Hi, Donna. Pop them in the box. If you've got any questions about acquiring property or mortgages, put them in. So with. To bring it back to what we're doing right now. I know you've been on the phone pretty much all day, every day with people in different financial situations. With everything that's happening with the coronavirus that's going on, is there something that's kind of come up again and again that's a really common thing that people should be watching for with their mortgages and watching for with their finances?

Two things, I think. Number one, I went in to get my car service the other day, and I was having a lovely chat with the guy behind the counter. He was not a client of mine, but we were just having a chat, and he knew what I did for a living, and he really proudly told me me that he'd put his mortgage on pause. And I said, oh, have your hours been cut back here? Have you been impacted? And he's like, no, no, just did it. Just thought I should. That's the number one thing I want people to be really aware of. Putting your home loan on pause, which all of the banks will give you the ability to do right now. If you don't need to do it, don't do it. It doesn't say you anything. They've got to make you pay that interest and potentially pay interest on the interest. It's not a good thing. If you need to. That's what it's there for. For 100%. If you've been Impacted, Absolutely. But if you are carrying on working as normal, if you're able to continue making your repayments, definitely do that. The other thing is, and I'm all about seeing the positives of every situation, much like yourself. And my 6 year old wrote this really cute journal entry the other day called the ups of COVID 19. She did it all completely on her own. I told her to write a travel blog and she wrote a post about the ups and downs covid19 and she wrote about how there's more time for snuggling and family. And it was beautiful. But the cool thing about this COVID 19 situation is actually around the savings piece because if you are still able to work through this situation, which many, many people are, there's nothing fun to do with your money. And provided you don't go too overboard on shopping at J. Crew, you can't go to concerts, you can't go on holidays, you can't spend all your money. So there's this beautiful opportunity for people to be saving. If you want to get ready for a home loan application to have your transaction accounts looking really beautiful and lean, there's a big plus side here. For people who are getting ready to buy or wanting to save or wanting to smash away at their mortgage, it's a good reset here.

Yeah. And so with the situation that you're in now where you go, you know, you bought enough properties and you've done all of that, what shifts in your wealth, creating strategy as you now go in the next chapter.

It sounds like you just asked me what my five year plan is and I never have a plan like a long term plan. I've never been able to. I'm terrible at them. I don't have a long term business plan or a long term financial plan.

All of your financial things are long term things that you invest in.

Yes. I'm very boring though. That's because I don't flip properties. I don't develop properties. I buy boring properties that boring families will want to live in for a boringly long time. That's my investment strategy. It's boring. I don't, I don't renovate. You know, if a property needs a new kitchen or something like that, begrudgingly, I will put it in. But I don't want to pick the colors. I don't want to. I don't care what it looks like. I want someone else to do all of that for me. And I want my tenants to be happy. I want them to live in really nice, well maintained properties. But I don't want. I'm not going to be building a block of units on the back of it. I'm not going to be subdividing off this. I'm not going to be going in and renovating and flipping it. I'm boring. And so for me, if I buy a property, it's because I can envisage holding onto it until the end of time and handing it on to my children and never having to worry about selling it. So my strategy is boring. It has been for ages. I'm not actively looking for property at the moment. The last property I bought was a commercial property, which is new for me. It's when my office is. And it was because I needed somewhere for my office to go because my rent had tripled. So it was again, it was just a means to an end. And I was lucky enough to be able to get a property which had residential tenancies as well. So that made it feel more comfortable for me because that's what I know, that's my wheelhouse. But as far as long term plans, I started up a group investing in shares with friends about three years ago. My word, we were having a brilliant run until the last, you know, six weeks or so where everyone's had, you know, a dive in their values. But it's been super fun. There's 13 of us, we invest, we meet three times a year. We're learning all about that side of it. So there'll be a bit more diversification in my strategy going forward because I'm the least diversified person ever. My supers in property, everything outside supers in property, I work in property. If property struggles, I struggle. So yeah, there'll be some more diversification and I guess just being open to opportunities. Oh, hello, lovely Ray. I am boring. You know I'm boring. You see me in my pajamas. Ray has an amazing business. We'll do a shout out for her. She has a business called Delicious Little Things and she makes the most beautiful things. And every now and then we'll drop them off at my house. See me working in my pajamas at the moment.

Nice. We have a question from Victoria here. If we're on a fixed rate, is it possible to renegotiate this? We're halfway through our fixed term. Don't need to, but it might be an opportunity to pay less interest.

So the answer with most banks is yes, you can renegotiate it, but yes, they'll charge you a break fee. So the annoying thing is the fixed rate was probably the right thing for you, when you set it up, you know, it gave you some confidence and you know, surety in terms of what you were paying going forwards. But now the interest rates that we're at at the moment are so low, like unprecedentedly low. Call up your bank, explain to them the situation, find out what your break fee is and I'll always give you a break fee to today's day because break fees change day in, day out. And then if it is less than 3 or $4,000, there's lenders that will pay you that much to go over to them at the moment. So you may end up sort of break even. If you look at a lender like that, it's not the only reason to look at it, but it's a factor to consider. But most lenders at the moment, unless you find their pain point, some lenders are very, very jittery in terms of people leaving. But it's unlikely that they're going to let you out of it without a break cost. But your break cost might be less than you anticipate. So it doesn't hurt calling them, finding out.

Yeah, beautiful. Thanks, Victoria. So again, if anyone else has any questions, if you've just come on, if you've got any investing wealth creating mortgage based questions, Kirsty can answer them all. Now I want to pressure, no pressure at all. I want to ask you a travel question because you and I, you are actually, I think the only person with children I know who travels more than me. And it is very hard. The situation right now, I know, you know, we feel very, very trapped and not able to go and get, get on a plane. What I want to know is what is the best trip that you have ever been on that you would recommend to people both with children and without.

Okay, well, the trip we did to India, not, not playing favorites because you're talking to me, but you took me to the best hotel of my life, which was the Lake palace in Udaipur in India. And during quarantine times, I'm trying to finish my romance novel and I'm at the part where they are in that town right now. So that's pretty exciting. But that was, that was amazing.

Best solo in your spare time.

It's saucy too, which is exciting. It's just getting, it's just getting good. And so, you know, as a single person living on my own, that's the only writing my own saucy novel to.

Do the course for men on how to behave on Tinder, I still think that's the Thing we don't want to get too off topic, though.

Best solo trip, though. Petra in Jordan is my favorite place, but a place that I could go back to again and again and a place that has my heart. It's New York and I'm feeling for it so much at the moment. And then best trip with kids, again, really, really controversial at the moment. But my favorite trips with my kids have all been on cruise ships. I love that for traveling with kids because the whole hotel moves for you. Not your thing, but totally our thing. We have gone through China, Korea, Japan, all around Europe into Russia. Like we have. We have just done everything but Paris with my kids a couple of years ago. Bike riding around the city. Just amazing. What's the book called, Sveta? The book is called Pre Orders Are Being Accepted. Yeah, yeah.

She's still writing, so. I know at the beginning I touched on your adorable frugality. Now what I want to ask you is, do you think now. I mean, I read. Whose book was it? I can't. Dave Ramsey.

What color is it in?

Blue. Dave Ramsey's book. That was. I can't remember which one it was called at the moment, but it was something. And it's very simple stuff in terms of going, you just want to save this money. You want to not have your coffees and you want to put it into here. Which I kind of read the whole thing and just go like, no, it just. To me, life's too short to not have the enjoyment. And my way of living has constantly been, I have champagne taste. And so I have always. There's a meme I saw once that said I have to be successful because I really like expensive shit. And I was like, oh, oh, that's me. But what would be your kind of everyday money tips? Are you at the school of thought where you build wealth through not having that coffee, not going out to dinners, not doing all of that sort of stuff? Or are you a hybrid or where do you sit with that?

I'm a hybrid, I think. I think it's about figuring out what gives you the optimum amounts of joy. So if I went out and bought a box of soap at the supermarket and spent that, I don't know how much a box of soap costs, it would give me no joy. I like seeing my hotel soaps from my travels, and I like going, oh, this one's from wherever it was and using it, so it would give me no joy to do it a different way. So that's. For me, I'm like the Marie Kondo like finding joy in the moment. So if you get intense joy out of buying a takeaway coffee and loving that, don't deprive yourself of takeaway coffees. But if you're having four takeaway coffees a day and just tapping and having no concept of the fact that that's 20 bucks a day, that's 100 bucks a week, if you've no concept of it, that's where the danger point is. Because I say this to my clients all the time. Our money doesn't disappear by us buying big screen televisions every week. It disappears. Here's from Tap, tap, tap. And no conscious thought about where it's going. So for me, I don't see. I'm not a coffee drinker. I'm a tea drinker though, and I spend lots of money on beautiful tea because it makes me happy. But for me, I don't have a single fancy designer handbag because I would derive no joy from it. I don't drive a fancy car because I don't get any joy from it. But I would spend enough to make, you know, 20 year old Kirsty's toes curl on travel because that is where I get the joy. And so I live in a, you know, I live in a nice house, but it's not a fancy mansion palace. You've been here. It's a, it's a nice house in a nice area. I've lived here for a really, really long time though. And I don't, I'm not the person that gets intense joy out of having all the beautiful things in my house either. So I've kind of figured out what makes me tick and it's not, it's not. I don't give a shit what anyone else, what makes them tick, you know, like, I don't care about being seen with the latest this or the latest that. I care about that feeling when I step off a plane in a foreign airport and things smell different and sound different. That's, that's what gets me excited. So that's where I'll spend my money and I won't care about, I don't know, the girls at work. Actually, they've got the Jetstar flight alerts and sometimes they'll call out and they'll be like, Bali's on sale. And I'm like, I don't want to go to Bali at that time. I don't know, I don't, I don't, I don't splurge often, but on travel I do. And it's just about what gives me joy.

Yeah, that's a beautiful way to do it, I think, because there's. It is different for everybody. Like, it's the same with the dress story I told before, which was designed just to make people laugh. I will tell you that I know that it wasn't the smartest thing to do, but at the same time, I will get a lot of enjoyment out of wearing that dress, even though it was a dress that I loved the look of. And really I will get a kick out of wearing it because I know the lengths I went to to get it and it was a bargain.

I'm like that with books. With me, there's some books I can only get in America. So I get a friend, I get them to said to him and then he says it over there. So our books and dresses will pass in the night. Coming from America, we can do that.

So I know a lot of people that are watching today have their own businesses. What are your tips and your theories on drawing money out of business to. I mean, I know Robert Kiyosaki says a business is a vehicle to then build your wealth in property. What's your school of thought with that? With. Should you use business as a vehicle to build external wealth because your business and property.

Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, for me and you and I've spoken about this before, I feel like I'm pretty good at my job, but I'd probably be a really, really bad employee. Every now and then I fantasize about working for one of my dream companies, Disney or someone like that. But I still think I would be really, really bad. Because if, if I want to hang out with my kids for three hours and not look at my email, I want to have the flexibility to do that. So I definitely use business as a vehicle for wealth and then I want to take it out of the business and I want to put it into something that I hope will appreciate in value over time. Absolutely. I'm also. I feel old when I say this, but I'm at a later stage in my life now than I was say, in my 20s. My 20s were all about acquisition. It was.

Was like watching Kirsty's in her 40s, just.

Just my 40s.

At this later stage in life.

But I don't, I don't. And I. I don't think I physically could work the volume and the way that I do now for another 10 years. I. I wouldn't probably be able to, but it works for me at the moment. I've got young kids. I Work when they sleep. I work a lot of times around that. I never work Friday night around this.

Yes. Kirsty advises me on money management. I advise on time management and boundaries.

And sometimes we both ignore each other. It's great.

We do, but it's fun. All right, any money related questions so I can see? Yes. Victoria bought her best friend's house from the teenage years. That's really cute. Yes. I will tell everyone my story when I twirl in my dress when it comes. So any money questions for Kirsty put in there? I'm gonna put in the comments box as well. Kirsty's mortgage broking firm. So it's called up loans. So that's in there now in the comments. So if you do not want to use Facebook as a forum to ask any mortgage or money related questions, you can get on there and book a call in with Kirsty as well. Because I know sometimes what we're talking about, if we're talking about marketing, for example, the comments box runs crazy with people asking a lot of questions. And this is one of the reasons I wanted to do this is when we talk about money, there's everyone on here and everyone's pretty quiet about asking all of the different questions questions. But it's something that, you know, I totally believe that life is short and we're here for a really good time and to find a lot of joy. And Kirsty and I have been both, you know, a version of wealthy and a version of poor. And I know what is more fun.

One thing that I really like about you and that I try and emulate a bit more around money is that you remember to celebrate your wins. I know you've got certain, like a piece of jewelry for a certain time in your life and things like that. And then you look at it and you're like, oh, that's my, you know, that's my ring from this time and things like that. And I'm really, really bad at celebrating milestones. I'm like, I just did that goal that I really wanted to do and offer going on to the next one. Yeah, so I do like that. I like, I feel like if, if my, if there's one thing that I could get out to people, it would be to be. Be conscious about where they're spending their money, to be conscious about enjoying it and conscious about what their future goals are. But, you know, the number of people where, as a mortgage broker, I ask people to declare what they believe that they spend on a monthly basis, but Then we have to compare that to what they actually spend on a monthly basis. And the number of people that are stunned at how much they're actually spending is phenomenal.

Yeah, I still get my credit card statement every now and then, and I look at the total and I look at the. The actual items, and I'm like, there's no way that can all add up to that amount. It just. That just does not make sense. There's no way I get my calculator out, convinced that they've made a mistake, and then. Yeah, it's. It's always right. It's always right.

Little things add up, though, don't say, because it's not those big ticket Items. It's like $20 here, $30 there, $10 there. Tap, tap, tap.

Yeah, for sure. But it's something. I mean, I've always done that at the end of every month is go through every statement, go through every credit card and just go, did I need to spend that? And you can, like you said, Marie Kondo, it. Did it bring me joy? And if things do, then go for it. It's worth working for. But the worst is when you end up with a whole heap of things that you just go. I just splash that down the toilet.

And it's the things, like, it's a. It's the things that you tap on that don't give you any joy. Like, you know, just. I'm just driving through maccas. And I do that as well. You know, Hash Brown is speaking to me. Tap, tap, tap. But then there's also. There's great studies and articles done about the fact that possessions, the amount of joy that each one brings you, as you add to them, it's less and less each time. Whereas the moments, memories, you know, we're doing a lot of journaling in our house at the moment. It's one of our favorite, you know, travel exercises. So I'm bringing it into quarantine time. But the things that my kids remember are the moments. You know, they remember the feeling. They remember what we did on this trip because of how they felt or who they met. Or again, it's back to those smells and those sights and those things. They don't diminish over time. The memories that you have from a trip, for me, get more powerful over time because my brain is like a beautiful sieve, and it filters out all of the times when the children were unhappy or cried or we were delayed or whatever. And I just remember the gold. Best thing about my aging senile brain.

Yeah, I Did that just the other day. I was going, it's about time that I put together photo books from our trip because it was the one year anniversary since we've returned from our around the world trip. I was like, we need these photo books. Anyway. So I spent the long weekend over Easter, like putting all of the photos together and going, I remember nothing but brilliant memories from that trip. And I'm crying going, I just want it so bad. But there were times like every second day I was going, oh my gosh, have to get on another plane. If we get into another room and there's like dirt on the shower floor, like all of the things, all the things. But we do, we remember the good stuff, which is, which is good. And you've got to find what's worth spending money on. On. Because we're all working hard. Like I. A lot of the women that are on here are all business owners that, that I know are working bloody hard. But I think the worst thing. So this is what I want to ask you because there was an event that I ran and most of the women that were in there were in late fall, 40s, early 50s. And the general consensus was disappointment because people felt like they should have been further along than where they were. And I think because everyone trying to me. So let me know what you think after. But you started by saying you took little tiny steps. I started by taking little tiny steps as well. You know, I bought. I could buy something in Sydney, so I bought in Canberra and then I bought a really shitty mcsh like up North Queensland. And then like all of the different tiny, tiny little steps to then enable me to do the next thing. And it's the same with business. Like, it's just one tiny step after another. But I think people see where they are and where they want to be and it's such a big step that they then get discouraged and don't start taking those little steps. But for someone that's kind of not in their 20s, but going, you know, I'm in my 30s or my 40s or my 50s, why aren't I where I am now? What do you think?

Do you feel like it's maybe the kind of people that are putting themselves in an environment, like a learning environment like that, that are the reaches like people. Because you say, you know, those people are not where they thought they would be. I'm not where I thought I would be. And I look back at my 20s and I'm like, why didn't I do more? I could have. I never Had a conversation with a bank manager where a bank manager said, oh, slow down. You know, I just. We all have that tendency to be a bit hard on ourselves and to think, gosh, I could have or I would have or I should have. But I also, I do believe that we're where we're meant to be. And I believe that, you know, if you miss out on an opportunity, it wasn't your opportunity. I just think it's the type of people that you're interacting with. Imagine if you had the type of person that was completely happy with where they were in life. They wouldn't be online trying to learn, they wouldn't be trying to get something out of that next level. Those people that are really, really happy with where they are, that's fantastic. But they're not the people that are constantly going, how do I better myself? How do I strive, reach, get the next thing? And I think that once you have that in you, how do you speak? Stop that. You can't. Like, I can't imagine I ever get to a stage where I'm like, okay, done, did it next. Even then I couldn't even say it. I ended up with going, next. Like, what's the next thing?

I can't remember. There was a book I read a few months ago and I cannot remember what it was called or who it was written by or anything. But the sentiment in there was, it was like explaining which was really helpful to me in how to be content with what you have but still be striving for more. Because to me I always had this disjointment in going, well, if I say I'm content then does that mean I'm not going to grow anymore? And can you do both of those things at once? And being happy where you are, but being happy where you are doesn't mean that you don't want to be like, go for it because I get to see it every day. So with you talking about like the people that, that are very happy where they are and content with everything. My husband's the polar opposite to me, which, you know, who you know, we got married today is actually our 18 year anniversary from asked me to be his girlfriend, which is momentous for me because it's. We met at 18, so today marks more of my life with him than without him, which is pretty cool. And so he wants for nothing. He's totally happy with everything and finds it absolutely mind blowing. How I always want to grow the business and I always wanted another house. Like we've just drawn up Plans to first it started out, let's do a light renovation on the house and then let's put a second story. And if we're putting a second story, actually maybe we should knock it down and build like this big compound house. That'd be cool. So it's all always thinking more. But what I've learned in the past couple of years and travel's really helped me with that, is I can be really happy with where I am and still be striving for more. We can do both of those at once.

Absolutely. And it is so important. First of all, I love the yin and the yang that you guys have and I feel like if you were with another you or I was with another me, it would be an absolute disaster. So that's great that you've got the yin to your yang there, but I feel like, yeah, that moment where you go like, I may not have everything that I ever want to achieve in my life, but far out now is pretty good. Like even at the moment when we're all stuck in our houses and I haven't gotten out of pajama pants in five weeks, now is still really good because, you know, I've got two tiny humans that I cuddle a lot. I've got beautiful people that I can still connect with. I've got a business that's able to continue working throughout this and help people. Like it is about seeing that beauty and that joy and as my 6 year old will call it, the UPS. Got to find the ups in whatever you're looking at. But that doesn't mean that people like us can turn off that, that striving side of us. Never going to happen, girl. I'm sorry, you're going to be 150 and you're going to be like, but one more thing, I just need to do this.

Yes, I can't wait. I just love it all. That's the thing. I have a very high enthusiasm for life. But so Victoria said here she's handed over the fortnightly budget to the 18 year old and had a shock when he did the shopping planning for children not to come home and they finally move out. Budgeting is so important. And yes, Victoria and this kind of takes me to my next question is post COVID 19 era. To me it was amazing to watch everything hit and within two weeks so many things fell. Like so much ran out, so much fell that I was like, wow, our whole world is really on a very thin line. Is there something, some sort of advice that you would give when this Lifts and when we go back to normal life, a behavior change that people can adopt to help if we ever get in a situation like this again. What have you seen through your clients that's really helped people be steady?

The people that have been sensible as far as having backup savings, they are the people that even if the worst has happened, I have a lot of clients who are travel agents. It's an industry that's been very, very hard hit at the moment. But the ones that have their ducks in a row in terms of backup plans, contingency plans, knowing, you know, not just travel agents. I have hosties, I have all sorts of people. But the more that have backup savings, you know, you look at people that went through the Great Depression and they are frugal, they don't like to have debt. We, we are too obsessed with debt in Australia. And I always divide debt into two different categories. Stuff that's easy for you to get is no good for you. Anyone can get a credit card after pay zip, pay Harvey, no man, go card. All of that sort of debt, if it's easy to get, it's bad for you. If that's like the only thing that people take away from this conversation, it doesn't mean that I don't have a credit card. I have a credit card, but it's paid off in full each month. I don't pay interest on it. If you can't do that, try not to have a credit card. Because what will happen is if you don't have enough money to pay for your credit card, you spending tomorrow's money, you're not spending today's money, you then have to work in the future to earn the things they're spending for today. And so you get people that grew up through the Great Depression, they want to pay off their home loans, they want to have no debt. You know, look at your grandparents generation and very few of them, you know, got to a stage later on in life where they had any debt against their homes. And you know, people will always say, oh, that's because prices were so cheap then. Prices will look cheap now in 20, 30 years time as well. That's just, that's just how money works. You know, you're never going to look back and go far out. You know, 30 years ago things were expensive. It's not how money works. So everything that we do today, if the best thing that we take out of this is actually a little bit of fear is not the right word, but caution. What if this happens again? You know, I was talking with a girlfriend last night, and she was saying that in terms of her business, it's a business that's been impacted. And she said, I've got this general feeling of unhappiness when I wake up in the morning. And I said, me too. I tend to cry most mornings at the moment when I read the news until I stop reading the news. And I put it aside. But I said, okay, if you could go back five years, what would you have changed five years ago so that when this happened, you would be okay? And then you can't go back five years. So what do you need to change right now so that if something like this happens again, I mean, nobody predicted that what is happening now would be happening. All of us will be impacted, everyone will be impacted by what's going on now. Even if your current work situation doesn't change, you will be impacted in some way by this. So what do you need to change now so that if something catastrophic happens again in the future, you're okay through it and the ones you love are okay. And I remember have a girlfriend who I don't know if you have any girlfriends. Tina, who you originally like, they hated you. I have a couple. I have a couple who it's like, I had to really work very hard for them to like me and to be my friends. And one of them is, I don't have really good mates now.

I'm like, love.

No.

Okay.

I really wanted this girl to be my friend, but the reason we couldn't be friends at the beginning was because she felt like I was a obsessed with money. And I had to explain to her over time, and now she gets it. Now we get each other really, really well. Money was not something that she discussed growing up, and it was something that I discussed. So I've always been more comfortable talking about it with people. But I want money for money's sake. I want money to protect my family. We lost my house growing up. If I can put myself in a position where that never, ever happens to somebody I love again, that's it. That's my life. You know, that has been my life's goal since that happened to me as a teenager. I don't want my family to have no home. I don't want my family to have their car repossessed. You know, that's where the motivation comes from. So what do you need to do in your lives coming out of this so that you can protect your family and your loved ones against something bad happening to them, you know, in life?

Yeah. And I Think that whether you're affected or not right now, I do think that, like what happened with the Great Depression, I think all of our. It's got to give people time to take stock and go, the people that aren't affected got out. So lucky. Like, I know for me, I've got an online business right now, so I am so bloody lucky. But the amount of times I have thought, had this happened at any other time in my life, I would have been completely fucked. Completely. 30 franchises, 120 staff, locations around the country. I was mortgaged to the absolute hilt. We would have been broke in about three days, three days flat. So it's. Sometimes it's just timing and I go, you know, we were so lucky to get out of that. But if something else affected in a different way, you know, so I do think it'll affect the way that everybody thinks and I hope it does.

I hope it actually in some ways, like, I want it to get back to normal quickly, but I also feel like the longer it takes us to get back to that, no more, hopefully the more lessons we'll take from this time. You know, you see memes all the time about, you know, before we rush too quickly back to what it was, what are we thinking about that we don't want to actually continue forward. So even just, I don't know, like, I thought that I did a good job of supporting local before this happened. And since it's happened, I realized that I can do 10 times better than what I've been doing. So that's a personal change that I'll take out of it. I've been so much more conscious about that now. And even thinking about the way that I travel, you know, you look at what's happening in so many areas because there's so much. So, like, can't use my words, I've had too many gin. But there's less travelers going around and polluting the world and it's like, okay, how do I travel in a more sustainable way? How do I immerse myself in the culture of a place rather than going dunk, dun, dunk and like seeing it all but not being part of it. So there's pluses to this situation? There are. They're just hard to see when we're in the middle of it. But hopefully we don't come out of it so quickly that we miss the benefit.

Totally. Totally. So before I get to my last one, does anybody have any questions? We're going to start wrapping up, so if you've got any Questions, pop them in the comment. But there. And so the one thing I want to ask you is kind of along those lines to finish off in going, what have you missed the most by being in quarantine?

There's an amazing book called the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, and I feel like it's the best book I've ever read in my entire life. And the. My love languages are quality time and physical touch. And so they are very, very difficult to get in isolation. So my poor kids, they're like, everybody hug me. I'd be like, hello, person at the supermarket. Thank you. Hello. You know, I just. I just, like, I see. I still see people. You know, I had a girlfriend come over and we exchanged something at the house the other day, but I just wanted to. I just wanted to smush her in my arms and hug her. Like, I just. I will miss, you know, the time I'm spending with my kids right now, but they are sick to death of my hugs. I am clutching them tight, like, I am getting into them. So if I can just spread my hugging to other people, that would be great. It's a great 4K, Carla. Like, life changing. Yeah.

So everyone let me know in the comment box, what have you missed most about being in quarantine? For me, it's purpose. I think, like, every day being Groundhog Day, I really like having to rush for something, and I know that's not good for you and all of that sort of thing, but I like having to, like, have different sorts of work because for a lot of people, you know, you go to an office every day. I work from home normally, so I need, like, every couple of weeks that one day work where I go to the city, to the big smoke, and have to prepare and have to go and do something and get on a stage and get out of my comfort zone and do all of that sort of thing, or get on a plane and go to a new destination or something, but having the same thing every single day and having nothing to break it up. Oh, yesterday I woke up just going, oh, my gosh, it is Groundhog Day. Go and do something and get on a stage and get out of my comfort zone and do all of that sort of thing, or get on a plane and go to a new destination or something, but having the same thing every single day and having nothing to break it up. Oh, yesterday I woke up just going, oh, my gosh, it is Groundhog Day.

That's why I was so quick to say yes to this. You were like, you want to Do. So I was like, yes, whatever it is, what are we doing? Give me something else to do. But I don't miss rushing. That's actually one of the best blessings for me. I think it's that I'm not rushing. I'm not rushing my kids. I like that I'm able to do my morning routine without feeling like I need to rush to get the kids to school on time. That was my one goal this year, is get the kids to school on time. Because we're perpetually late for school. Never late for anything else, but always late for school. We were doing so well, and now it's like we'll just cuddle in bed for an hour and a half in the morning. I'm good with that. I like that.

That's it. That's it. Victoria Ray said, contact with customers, especially the little people on a Saturday. Victoria said, not much has changed. I must admit, the first couple of weeks I was like, what's everyone talking about? This is my normal life. People don't live like this. But yeah, Ms. Spontaneity, I think that's, that's one of the biggest things I miss too, is going, you know, let's go out to the live bands and some nice dinner and doing that sort of thing. Carla said alone time. Yep. Love people. Love my space. Yes. Yep. Sit in that car park. You know, there's a client I had that the other day said she has been going for a drive and just sitting in a car park for an hour because she's. She works from home and she's used to having home to herself during the day. And there's humans all the time everywhere. So, yeah, it's a tricky thing yet, loving not living in the rush. I think I'm alone in enjoying the rush. I seem to have two speeds. I'm either, like, miss productivity and like going and everything's organized, or in the absence of a 15 minute incremented day where I'm needed and everything's planned out, I'm like, oh, all right, well, I have no purpose. I'll just do nothing. Yep. We've got to know what motivates us, don't we? Victoria said, I was late for a Zoom call this morning and I was at home. All right, well, Kirsty, thank you so much for coming on for the. For the first bring back of cocktails and coaching, which I will do while we're on quarantine. And so it's a limited, limited time only. I know I'm all empty, too. Next time I'M going to have to prepare two glasses so that I can back up next to each other. If anyone wants to get in contact with Kirsty and ask her any money questions privately.

Oh, we were going to do a giveaway.

Oh, yeah, Giveaway, Yes.

So for anyone that is going to email me, I don't know, let's say before Sunday at 8pm who's listened to this? My email address is Kirsty K I R S t y@uploans.com Tina put our website in the comments earlier on actual email. Oh, look at that. She's fancy. She's doing it. Shoot me an email and tell me if I send you something in the mail or on email if you're out of the country. Because I'm frugal and I, you know, reuse my tea bag. So I'm not mailing anything to Canada. But tell me that you will do something kind for somebody else, you will pay it forward and I will figure out a way to send you something nice in the mail to keep your ears entertained or your brain entertained during quarantine. My gift to you, and you are.

So wonderful with that. I would say so your love language is definitely, you know, the contact and doing all of that. But you are brilliant at gifting. That is like, you're the. Well, that's what we get along so well is you're like, I love giving gifts, you love giving gifts. And we're like, oh, my God, let's just shower the love. It's like a lot.

It used to be my primary. It used to be my primary love language and then I had kids and my love language has changed. So for those people like Carla who've read the book, my poor husband, he just, you know, I'm separated now, very amicably, but poor guy, he, like just figured out that I was into giving gifts and that sort of thing. Just got his head wrapped around that. And then I was like, sorry, touching. Now get off.

I love it. I just go. When I read that book, I was like, I think my love language is all of them. I would like them all. Alrighty, well, have a great weekend. Hopefully everybody's getting out of their driveways tomorrow morning. If you don't know about it, there's an Answer Today app, so if you haven't downloaded it yet, you can get that. And it plugs straight into the ABC's, their last post and the whole ceremony that they're doing. So you can go to the end of your driveway, light a candle and listen to the app for anzac day. Beautiful.

6Am Is that right? Have I got the right time?

They're doing one, I think, at 6am and another one at 8am for the.

People that 8am Nice.

Have a beautiful weekend, everybody. Thanks for tuning in.