Jill stanton interview

Why do you edit it? Shut up. We'll talk about it after.

You know what? I'm not going to edit it. I'm going to leave this in. In going.

Our interview starts with Jill Ralph sourcing this shit. Yes.

Jill Stanton. I should. Okay, so the reason I do it is because when I do it and I do the intro at the same time, it's literally an extra three to four minutes to put it together. So I'm like, well, I'll take the three to four minutes instead of sending it off to someone else and bothering them.

Yeah, right. Loading. Exporting all the things.

Yes, yes. I would just rather do it, but I know. Okay, so this is all about you.

My favorite days.

So the screw is what you are known for. How long has that been going?

We started that in 2012 on our wedding week. No, we had the idea for it in 2012 on our wedding week, which is probably like the one week you shouldn't be working. But, like, we were just so new in the game at that point. Josh had. We were all in on our business for that first year. He had his previous business before that. I had a previous business before that. But together, this was our first year. And so we're out on the balcony, like, our wedding guests were coming the next day or something, and we're having some rum. It was Costa Rica. We're listening to Bob Marley. And we were a couple weeks away from moving to Thailand at the time, in early 2013. And they have a big entrepreneur community there. And so we were talking about, like, we should document this because we were starting to get a lot of questions around what we were doing, right? Because, you know, we weren't working jobs. We were traveling heaps. We were making money on the Internet. People were like, what. What's happening here? Like, what's going on, you drug dealers? Like, what are you doing? And so Josh, I mean, you were in Costa Rica. It's not. Not accurate. And Josh was saying, you know, we should start a website to, like, keep our friends and family in the loop and blah, blah. I was like, that's a great idea. He's like, what would we call it? And I'm like, costa Rica Rum? And I was like, screw the nine to five. And both of us were like, I wonder if that's available? And we grabbed it and we locked it in and we kind of sat on it because we had never built personal brands before. Like, we didn't know what we were. We didn't know what we were doing at that point. We had A bunch of affiliate sites like skincare sites and beauty sites and personal hygiene and supplements and high heels. And none of it was branded to our names. We wrote under a pen name. I did some videos and stuff and pictures, but none of it was like, us on the line, like, putting ourselves out there. So we didn't even know what the heck to do. And if you look back to the early days of the screw, I think we've hidden a lot of the, like, nonsense posts we ran, but it was like lessons from the Coach Koh Tao mafia, which is an island in Thailand we were living on there. How to get traffic from Pinterest or how to work with your significant other. It was all over the place. There was no strategy whatsoever because we didn't know what we were doing. And so in 2013, we are like, let's start. Let's create a course and what should we make it? And we're like, guest blogging, because definitely people want to learn that from us. Turns out no one did because you sold that sexy no courses, $0. I ugly cried for 24 hours straight. No joke. And that was the best thing that ever happened to us at that point, of course.

And so what was the turning point with it when you were going, you know, you're running around the world and you. You finished ugly crying and then went, okay, I'm going to try again. Was the next one the success? Or did you have a few iterations before you were like, okay, now this is on a winner.

Yeah. So that was the biggest lesson at the time because we created what we thought they wanted, and it was the most pivotal lesson we could have learned because it's like, oh, no, no, no. What do they think they need? And so we were like, well, a lot of people ask us how to make money online, huh? Ding. And how do we make money online? Affiliate marketing. And that's the question we get all the time. And so then we put out a email to our newsletter saying, like, this is now our new focus. We're going to start teaching affiliate and how we make money online and travel everywhere. And if you want to stay in our world, like, we'd love to have you. And if not, like, totally cool. We understand, but we're going this way now. And most people stuck around. And then we launched our next course after that pre sold it. Made a whole $4,000.

Yeah, nice work.

And then we're like, yes, we didn't lose 5,000. Like, we did the first one and then launched that got some results with it. And Then open it back up. When we had the course created, did another 4,000, then did our first webinar and did 8,000. And then we're like, are we Oprah rich right now? Because I think we are. It was just like. And then it was like, game on. And it's just been, that was 2014 and it's been a seven year process of ups and downs.

I love that figuring out. I had a similar experience when I did my first proper like live launch for the seven days days. And I did $11,000 and finished and going, oh my gosh, this is going to be a million dollar company. Like, this is amazing because I could see how leveraged and scalable it was. But what I find is working with a lot of people is they have a launch that's $5,000 or $10,000 for their first one or two, and they're devastated because they see all the massive numbers and they're really disappointed. But every single person I know that is successful in courses has our exact story in going, you know, we had this. We were like, oh my God, it wasn't a question of if, it's when. And we knew we were on a winner how, like, what's been your experience with that? Because you talk to a lot of people at the beginning level, of course, creation as well.

I have a lot to say about that in case. Oh no, my, my necklace fell off. Sorry. This is how animated I am. I'm just going to leave it. I have a shag rug and it's.

Now just, it's going into the abyss.

Yeah, I have a lot to say about that. So I work, like you said in screw the 9 to 5, we work with a lot of up and coming course creators and a lot of them experience that. So they make like 500 bucks or a thousand or two thousand or five thousand or whatever it is. And they think they should be further ahead by, by that point. Right. Because that's what is sold. That's the, like our space, this online business, online marketing space is so declarative. And it's like, if you don't do this, you're shit. And if you don't do this, you're bad. And if don't do this, you're failing. And so a lot of people get in their head around that and they make it mean, oh, clearly I'm not cut out for this because I only made 500 bucks or 1000 or whatever it is. Right. But the way I talk to our clients and our members is like, what if that is your current capacity level, though. Like, what if that is a perfect sign that you need to like, okay, cool. My energetic and operational capacity right now is, you know, $2,000 worth of customers and what can I do and who can I become to increase my capacity? Right. Because you don't have to go from like 2,000 to 20 to 200,000. Right. That can be really unsustainable for a lot of people because one, they don't have the systems in place. They don't have the team in place. They don't know how to handle or.

Hold space on the launches. Spending a bucket load of money on Facebook advertising, and then they go and just disappear.

Yeah, yeah. How many times have we seen people come and go out of this space? They come in, make a huge splash, think they're killing it, and then they're gone because they can't handle the heat, the ups and downs. Yeah, right. The stresses and the successes.

Yes.

Right. A lot of people are worried about failure, but just as many people are actually worried about the success. Like, how will I know what to do? Or what if people come after me for money? Or what if they think I'm greedy or I'm all about the money or I'm conceited or I'm selfish or I'm full of myself or whatever it is, and they stack all these what ifs when really you could just like honor where you're at. And I don't want to. I hesitate to put, like, make it good enough, but, like, be happy with it, be present to it and use it as a, like a jumping off point to go to the next level. Okay, great. I now know my energetic set point. This one thing you and I have talked about in a lot of our conversations. Like, your energetic set point is now $2,000 with launches. I now know how to make $2,000 with launches. So that is my minimum set point. Right. Or my energetic minimum. Well, what do I have to do and who do I have to become to make four? Okay, cool. That's now my energetic set point. What do I do and who do I have to become to make 8 and then 16 and then 32 and then 64 and then 128 and then 256. I'm going to stop, but you know what I mean. Like, you just, you baby step. It's micro wins, micro actions, micro growth. So many people think it has to be big and sexy, but it's steady growth that really wins in the long run.

Yeah. Okay, so I have, like, all My questions, the hard part about you is I go, okay, that leads into that question, but I still want to circle back and get my original question in. Because if I don't, I never will. In going, so you're Canadian, Josh is Australian. You traveled the world at the beginning. How did you two meet and how did you get into what you were doing online in the first place?

Yeah, whenever people ask me this, Josh always goes, do you want the short version or do you want the long version? And now he's not here. So effort. I'm telling my version. So back in 2009 when we met, I was moving to Australia. I was in web TV at that time. This again, 2009. I started my first web TV show in 2006, the days of MySpace and when, like, YouTube just got sold to.

Google, you were always going to be in the Internet.

Yeah, it's like when people were not watching Internet tv, thankfully, because it was still the time where you could erase shit off the Internet. Because I admitted a lot of things because I had a show on dating, sex and relationships. And I had a lot of fun in my 20s. So I'm like, real happy you could delete that, the Internet at that point. But anywho, I was moving to Australia with a girlfriend of mine to do another web TV show that was sponsored by the Gold Coast Tourism Board and a bunch of other companies. And I had met Josh's at that time business partner and his now wife. And they were living in Canada for a year. And we connected through a mutual friend. And they were like, oh, you should meet our friend Josh. He's coming to town for, I think it was like three weeks and I'm single and I was moving to Australia. So I was like, well, is Josh hotel? Like, don't even bother. He's bachelor for life. He's never had a girlfriend. And I was like, sounds perfect. I'll meet him.

And so now you've been going through the screw for a long time. And then last year was when you stepped out and started creating the Millionaire Girls Club on your own to go, oh, I'm going to.

It wasn't even last year. This year it was. Well, I had the idea. First off, can I just say, when I met Josh, I picked him up. So he was living in Beijing, China at that time, running his programming team. And I picked him up for dinner with this other couple. And he walked out in like cobalt blue jeans and red, black and white plaid shirt. And I was like, what the hell? And I was like, hey, Josh, I'm also four years older than him. So I was just like, oh my God, this kid. And I was like 28 at the time. He was 23. I was like, hey, Josh. And he's like, oh, good day. And I was like, Josh is so hot. But he wouldn't, he wouldn't talk to me, he wouldn't sit beside me, he wouldn't sit across from me. He sat diagonal and ignored me the whole time. And I was like, must have. And that was really the start of it. He finally gave me the time of day, like towards the end of dinner. And then from there, I mean, he flew to Vegas to meet me for three days. I moved to Australia, he showed up on my doorstep and that was amazing. We've been together ever since. Yeah. So going back to mgc, sorry, I just had to put a bow on this because again, I'm the long, long storyteller. So I actually had the idea for MGC, which is Millionaire Girls Club, back in 2019. And honest to God, like, if I'm being really real and fully honest, like, I sat on that idea because I was way too scared of it. Because Millionaire Girls Club is, I mean, you know, we work is focused on serving and connecting high caliber women who are at the million dollar plus mark and connecting them with other badass women. And I had a very strained and tumultuous experience with female friendships. And I know a lot of women can relate to that. And I had like a decade long experience of just being like mercilessly bullied. And so for me to hold space and step out into that arena to be like, oh, cool, now I'm gonna like create a business serving women, like, just triggered all the wounds, all the sister wounds, all the fears, all the, like, just everything I had in myself. And so it took me two years to finally say yes to it. And I finally said to Josh, like, I'm gonna do this last October or November, and I launched in January.

And I'm so glad that you did.

Yeah.

And so what is, like, what's the goal with that? What's the big picture?

Luxury retreats for badass women at the million dollar mark? I don't know if you can vibe with this tea, but I know you, so I feel like you can is like as you are at that level or as you reach or cross that level, like the bigger you get, the smaller your circle gets, right? Because there's less women who really understand the sacrifices, the inner work. The inner work you have to do, who you have to become. All that you have to manage, right? Because it's not just business if you're a mom or a wife. Like, there's that invisible workload as well, right? Like all the other things we manage and all the other space we hold for the people in our lives, like, it's not just work, right? And so not a lot of people get that. And so they're like, oh, that's just Dina doing her little Internet thing. You're like, say, what, I make a million plus a year? Like, no. And so my intention is to create luxury, badass rich AF experiences for those women who don't always take that time for themselves, Right? Because if they are going to do vacations or retreats, well, I should probably do it with my family, right? Like, I don't really take that much time off, so I should probably make time to do that with my family. Or they just don't have the capacity. Capacity to plan something like that. And so I was like, well, I cannot wait.

If Australia does not let me on a plane, I will get out my kayak and I will start paddling. Yeah, I'll swim the whole way. Now, you said something there that I'm hoping this would tip off. Like, one of the epic deal rants that I absolutely live for is the inner work and doing the. That are hard and putting in the effort with it. And I love your kind of what I'm trying to get across. So I know your answer to this, but the way that you put it so eloquently is it's kind of going. And this is. This is why I have to ask you the question is, because clearly I can't put it eloquently is going. You take the hard work and doing the things that nobody else is doing, but still also hold that feeling of ease and doing that. And I think sometimes it's misinterpreted by people coming into the online game and going, we see all these people saying, you know, what if it was easy and take the path of least resistance and manifest it and do all of those different things and then think that that's in the absence of actually doing the work and taking the risk. And then they feel like if they're working too much, they're doing the wrong thing, but you still got to get it off the ground. So can you give me your eloquent answer with how you balance the two of those?

I don't know, one successful person that hasn't put in hard yards and massive action and a massive amount of work, especially in the Beginning like anyone who is telling you that you can just be like easy and you'll make a million dollars, like that is just nonsense. And I feel like they're trying to sell you something, right? But it's like a rocket. I'm sure everyone's heard this analogy. Like it uses like 90% or 80% of its fuel to even get off the ground. View you starting your business and getting first million or even your first hundred grand as that like you put in massive action. Because yes, intention, visualizations, dreams, goals, cool, that initiates everything you want. But it's action that initial that enables the reception of it. So yes, you can be woo and manifest and all that kind of stuff, but if you aren't taking action, aligned action, inspired action to go along with that, well then you're not going to get very far. And here's another thing I want to say about that is there's. There's taking action and then there's like forcing. Yeah, right, And I get it because forcing is the energy of like, it's not going to work or what if, what if it doesn't work? What if I fail? That's forcing. That's an energy of not having. Right? But you can take inspired action or just massive action in service of going where you want to go, but it not being out of a desperate energy of like, this might not happen for me. Instead it's an energy of like, I'm working towards something that really matters to me. I'm taking action in service of who I want to become and what I want to create and what I want to do and what I want to experience. That is totally different. Like want and embodied is like an energy of not having. I want this, but the underlying energy is like, I don't have it. And the energy of like, I am the type of person who has blah, blah, blah, or who does this and that or who experience this. That's an energy of like, it's on its way or it's coming or I'm calling it in or I already have it, right? It's two very different things. The focus is different and it doesn't seem like a big deal, but underneath it all, it's everything. Like when you say, I want to make a million dollars, but underneath it you're like, I don't actually have a million dollars. And that's where your focus is. Well then that's all you're perpetuating because the universe is like, oh, cool, you want that? Great, I'm going to keep giving you experiences or circumstances to just perpetuate the not having of it. Does that make sense? Like, it seems so subtle, and it is, but it's also everything. Does that make sense?

Yeah, completely. And then I think, because I, you know. You know my thoughts on hard work, Jill.

But then I think where you're getting better, though, you're getting so much better.

And that is thanks to you and all of our conversations around boundaries. And that's kind of where I want to get to the next stage is going. You're working with women, kind of that next level up as well. In going, there has to be an off switch. And I think one of the best things that you said to me was, you know, because I came from $0, I had to pay for everything with my time. And so I was very used to working harder. And you're like, you have the choice. You can pay for it with your time or your money. You now have the money back your time, and use the money. How do you. How. What's your advice to people where they're at that level where they're kind of growing and then they're getting to the point where they're reaching that burnout and that overwhelm and going, hang on. But I don't want to take my foot off the accelerator because I don't want the business to suffer, but I know I'm going to end up burnt out. Like, how do you. It's such a tricky line.

Well, that conversation was, for anyone listening was Tina and I were talking about, she's always built everything organically, which is amazing, because what you've created is. Is bonkers to have done that organically. I'm just like, I bow down. What? I was very happy.

I spent $600 on ads this week. A whole 600.

I mean, I'll take it momentarily, and then let's up it a bit. So what we were talking about is Tina was gearing up for her next launch, and I was saying, like, how many people do you want to get in your challenge? She's like, well, typically, I get this many. And I was like, okay, cool. So how can we, like, double that? And she's like, well, I guess I could do this and this. And I was like, no, you go to the traffic store and you buy yourself some traffic. That is Facebook ads or ig, Right? Like, you. You can pay. Like Tina was saying, with your time or your money. There's two currencies in business, and when you get to a certain level, you can only effort so much.

Yeah.

Right. Because you have a team and people to take care of and customers to take care of and a podcast issue. And, you know, there's just things that you deal with at a higher level that you just didn't have to think about at a lower level when it was just you with your moxie making shit happen. Right. And so at a certain level, you have to be like, okay, who do I want to be? Do I want to hustle and grind and do all these podcast interviews for other shows that don't really have audiences because, you know, I'm a hustler? Or do we want to be more leveraged with our time and our boundaries and our energy and buy our way in front of people, get in front of very targeted people who have intent to purchase and focus our energy there? Versus, I have 23 podcast interviews this week, and it's all with shows that have.

You know, I don't know who you could possibly be using as an example right now.

Jill. You, Tina, not me. That's you.

Yeah, but you know what? Like, I still think there's merit in doing that. At the beginning, for me, it was very much realizing, you know what. What got me here won't get me there. And I've now got to this stage, and, you know, I think, like, when the book hit the bestseller list, I was like, you know what that is? Because I was everywhere. I hustled my way onto everything. It was mass exposure, probably too much. And now I have to realize, okay, boundaries. How do we create those and go to that next level?

And what we're saying is, in the beginning, yes, that is necessary. It's the rocket. That's how you get it off the ground. That's how you get in front of people, right? Yeah. But at the level you're at, like, there are certain things that you can be like. I'm so grateful for these opportunities. Thank you. And I'm ready for bigger now. And so now I'm going to start saying no to the smaller things in order to make space for the bigger things to come in. And when you did that, look at how many things started flowing into your life. Right. Because you were like, okay, cool. I'm so grateful for what has come into my experience up to this point. I appreciate all of it, and I'm ready to go to the next level now. And so I will do podcast interviews or whatever, but at this level, yeah, so you get to do less, but it's, you know, I don't want to say worth more, but, like, a bigger Impact. Yeah. In front of more people.

Yeah. And what's your advice to women with boundaries? Because I know that so many women are people pleasing and suffer from that. And it's something that I really admire that you have is going, you know, you, you will connect with people. You would do the things. But if it's not like an absolutely, hell yeah. You're like, you know what? I just don't have time for that. And with the same thing with the growth when women get to a certain level, like, doing it and responding to all of the, like, social media comments and messages and saying, yes, when people say, hey, can I pick your brain for something? Can we have a quick chat? How have you done that while still being able to maintain or not feel like you're now withdrawing too much from people?

Here's the thing. I'm always trying to get better. Like, I don't have it completely figured out. I'm never going to pretend that I do. I still struggle with boundaries. Like, absolutely. If someone was once a customer and they're like, I'm launching a new show, will you do it? I'm like, damn it. And I usually say, just like, circle back to me in a couple months once it's launched. So I still have room for improvement. Of course. Like, I'm just a human who is just on the journey just like everyone else. Here's the thing I will say about people pleasing, though. It's your. You. When you sit in an energy of people pleasing, you are trying to control how people view you or experience you. It is done from a place of conditioning and programming and from what you experienced in, you know, earlier years. If you grew up with authority figures who always put their needs before yours or who taught you to do that in order to receive love or attention, of course that is going to be how you operate until you become aware of it. Right? And for me, I had to undo a lot of that. Not necessarily from my parents, but I had some very strained female relationships and not even relationships interactions, right. Where I was just very. It was very humiliating, degrading experiences. And so I learned from a very young age, because it started when I was around nine to just like, not be too much, not be too big, not be too loud, not be too seen. Right. And in case you can't tell, I'm a very demonstrative person. So it really, like, I had to minimize myself, I had to hide. I never wore makeup. I wore bulky sweaters. I really tried to like, not blend. I tried to blend it. And so in My experience with business up until I would say, I have my son, truthfully. And Josh was working with a coach at that time, Jim Porton, and I would listen to their coaching replays for the ones that he was cool with me listening to. And I remember Jim pointing out to Josh a fear of judgment. And I was like, fear of judgment. And I listened to it, and it was like you were trying to control how people experience you. And I was like, holy shit, that's all I've ever done. Like, really trying to, like, stay safe, not be talked about. Because that was just so my reality for years with, like, not knowing who's safe, not knowing who will leave you, not knowing who will stab you in the back, not knowing who will abandon you, all of that kind of stuff. And so I very much muted or maybe overcompensated who I was in an effort to, like, keep people at an arm's distance. And when I started realizing, like, how much of a fear of judgment I actually had and then had my son on top of that, well, it's just like a quantum leap in zero F ness, right? Because I was like, I no longer give an F about this, this, this, this. Like, we made huge shifts in our business. I felt like I shed a bunch of relationships that no longer serve me. Stop saying yes to a lot of things. Like, I just became much more focused on who I wanted to be and less apologetic for it. And I feel like so many women specifically, especially right now, like, with social media. Social media is like 24. 7 outrage, right? We're watching people get canceled, called out, all of this stuff torn apart. And people are like, I don't want any of that. Right? That's frightening to me. And so we mute ourselves. We play small. We try to blend in because we associate that person's opinion or truth with the truth about us, but their opinion doesn't matter. And what I'm trying to get women to realize, it's like, what happens if we start prioritizing self approval first over outside approval? What would your life look like? What would you release? What would you stop worrying about? What would you stop stressing over? What would you allow into your life if you no longer worried, what if. What if this person says this? What. What are people going to say about me if. What if someone sees me fail? Because that's really what it is. It's not like, what if I fail? It's like, what if someone sees me fail? Oh, my God, what will they think about me? What does that mean about me? Internalizing their truth as the truth, and instead it's flipping it and becoming less interested in what other people think about you and prioritizing what you think about you. Because how would you love yourself if you loved yourself the way you love others? How would you treat yourself if you treated yourself the way you treat others? Think about that first and then start realizing, what am I willing to hold space for? What will I say yes to from now on? What will I say no to? What will I no longer allow or be available for those?

Something that I think it feels so freeing even when you say. And it sounds so easy, but it's not true.

Yeah.

It's probably exactly what you just said then, is what I have worked on for, like, the last year solid and still going, oh, my gosh, like, how am I in this situation? It is. It's. It's so much easier said than done.

Yeah, for sure. I feel like that's everything with personal growth, though, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes. That's why it's so scary to ask yourself, what do I really want?

Yeah.

What do I really want?

Yeah.

Because once you answer that, well, now you have two choices. One, go after it. Right. Go to bat for who you want to be what you want to create what you want to do what you want, to have what you want to experience, or stay the same and suffered the, like, pain of that stagnation, that awareness of this is not what I want, but I'm too fucking scared. Oh, sorry. I'm too scared. I'm surprised.

First time you've done it, I'm like, what?

But I'm too scared to go after it.

Yeah.

That is painful. Right. And it's much more painful than this. Painful of going for it.

Yeah.

Because a lot of people, we just don't want to be seen. Right. So many of us are. We're scared of being seen for who we really are. We're scared of being seen for our weaknesses or who we think we're not. We're scared of being seen for starting small. Right. How many people want to start a business? But they're like, I just don't want people to see me starting small. Yes.

100%.

That was big for me with MGC.

This is what I'm coming back with with the. With the launches, when people start from the beginning and they're ashamed to go, you know, I just had someone in. In my mastermind that started her podcast, and she's like, I put my first episode out, and I had only 28 downloads. I don't think I'm gonna keep going. And I'm like, what? That was? It's brand new. And you had 28 people on day one pick it up and put you in their ears. Like, that is amazing. And everyone starts from zero. And I think social media has a lot to play in that, in going. And I think also, like, yes, there's some amazing stories, but I also think a lot of people lie also, bro.

No, I feel like I know a lot of people. Yeah. And sometimes you see the numbers and.

You'Re like, is that true? Like, may I please take a screenshot?

I remember I was at a big event with some real key players, and to see them just with their guards down being their actual selves, I was like, oh, this is such a good reminder. This is such a good reminder that none of us have it figured out, that none of us. Like, it's real easy to have the highlight reel, but what I'm after is the highlight real. R, E, A L. Yeah. Yeah. Living in that. Yeah. That is what people want. No, let's keep it real. Like, how many of us. Who doesn't vibe with perfect? Like, I don't vibe with perfect. I want real. I want resonance. That's what people. They want to resonate with you. And what if we just start prioritizing that when building our businesses, getting our podcasts out there? What if we're like, cool, Vanity metrics aside, I did it. Yeah. Where I had 28 people raise their hand and be like, that sounds like a great episode. Right. I'm like, let's keep it real. First episode's probably, like, why I'm starting this show. And people are like, can you launch episode two already? Right. Like, I don't care why you're starting the show. Bring me the good shit.

Yeah.

Right? Yeah. And so, like, first episode, like, that's your first at bat.

Yeah.

So you're just never gonna play baseball again because you struck out on your first go? Like, no, it's the same.

I did a live webinar once, and I had nobody show up. And it got, like, three minutes in, and I was like, oh, this. This is. This is not looking good. And then I thought, you know what? Fuck it. I don't want someone to come on. Like, if they come on at 20 minutes and I'm either not there or it looks like. So I ran the entire thing like it was a live audience thinking that I was, like, having a good practice. Anyway, nobody did come on. But a year later, I hit a million dollars and I think that that is. I know. And so I think that, you know, a lot of people think that that's not acceptable or when they do that, it's an indication that they're on the wrong path and they shouldn't be doing it. When really I just had to figure out, you know, I totally botched the entire promotion. I didn't know about all of the 50 gazillion emails to send that people needed as reminders beforehand. Like all of those things were less than, and now my show up rate is fabulous. But didn't know that at the start. And that's the lessons we have to learn.

Dude, how else are you supposed to know what works if you don't know what doesn't?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So my final question that I have for you, because you have been running these millionaire mixes which, you know, you're getting together these powerhouse women to just shoot the breeze and talk about business and do that, which is like the most amazing thing. And I, and you guys, I have begged Jill to do them as a paid. She won't. She won't do it because she's boundaried and I love her for that.

But I'm also frustrated because I don't have to do them consistently and I just like want to do it when I want to do it. My retreat's filling anyways. I'm just like, people are coming out of the woodwork to ask about it.

Yeah, of course they are. Yeah, of course. When you talked about it, I was like, what? There's zero doubt that it will feel like zero. But my question is, you've spoken to a lot of women at that seven figure level this year. What are the things that you see that they're doing that other people aren't? What's setting them apart?

Inner work. Always, always boundaries. Inner work, self worth work. And releasing control. I would say that is such a big one. Working on continuously releasing control. How many of us have a vice grip on how something should be done?

What control? What you talking about? I don't know. I have no issue with control as long as everyone does it exactly my way.

I have no issues with control as long as you stay in your lane and do exactly what you're told five minutes early too. Yes, that is definitely. And I would say like working on their relationships is definitely one that comes up a lot is, you know, I have a insert whatever relationship here. There's either some friction or things are great. But it's taken a lot of work to get there because especially if Your significant other is not an entrepreneur. Like, there's friction there. Especially if they're like, why are you working so much? And then shouldn't you be working? Yeah, it messes with a lot of women. Right. Why are you working so much? You barely have time for us.

Because my. My husband is like. Does not have a shred of ambition in him. Like, I got.

Hope he doesn't listen to this.

No, he will say it openly. Like, I got more in my pinky toe than he has, like, in his whole body. Totally unapologetically.

He.

I love him because he is the contented, easygoing man, I think, on the. On the planet. And I often talk to friends that they're both super ambitious. And I think that would be really hard because Matt's always going for me, like, when I want to go to conferences and when I want to go to different things, he's like, yeah, you go. I'll surf. This sounds great. And we never have, like, the competing priorities, which is so much easy.

I just from my personal experience and personal conversations with a lot of chicks, not everyone has an easy, breezy partner like that.

Yeah.

You know what I mean? And so a lot of people also have experiences where their significant other feels like they're ignoring them or that they get the worst of them or. I mean, it's kind of like a push and pull.

Many times in going, you know, like, especially with the performing of the nature of the work that we do when we're live presenting and doing that. And he's like, you. You know, you get everyone gets all your energy. All the best. And then I can be so deflated at the end of the day that I go in home and I'm just like, oh, give me the Snuggie. Give me the lounge.

Oh, God, the woodcutter, the termite. Yeah.

I will share that joke so people know what we're talking about there. There's nothing worse than when people have in jokes and you're like, what? So my snuggie, my husband nicknamed the termite because it kills wood. Anyway, it's very comfortable.

We've got off track. I would wear it all the time if I had a snuggie.

Yeah.

I mean, I'm in the Cayman Islands, so it'd be hot af, but if not, I would wear it all the time.

Yeah, same.

Anytime he would bring you coffee, I'd be like.

And so with that, like, I do think that, you know, that's been one of the really interesting learnings of me. Is there. There Was, I mean, why I first engaged you as my coach was for that exact reason was going. I was getting to the end of every day, zero energy and going. I've given everything I've got. And I was like perpetually tired and exhausted and couldn't see. I was going, okay, so I've got the million and a half a year business. Now if I want to get it to 5 million, I can't work five times harder. Like, I am done. I am spent. What do I do here? I know how to run this level business. I do not know how to run that level business. And that was so much of what I had to learn was how to get that energy and conserve that so that all the parts of my life can still get the best of that. And that's something that I think is going to take me another good 12 months to really work through and edge out.

I don't know, you really integrate quite quickly. You've made some big strides in such a short amount of time. Like, you're real coachable. Like, that's one thing that I just love about you is there's a lot of people who'll be like, yeah, I know, but. And you're like, no, you don't know. You'll be doing it. Yeah, but you're very open and coachable. You have a lot of just like, you don't take anything personally. And so I don't know if it will take you 12 months. Like it could be real quick for you. You know, you've realized, oh, okay, my energy is limited, my capacity is limited. I need to start paying more people to do more things to take my load off so that I can make better decisions. I can show up and serve my audience, my customers. Right? Like, you have to start taking stock of what are the levels of priority in your business. One customers, right? They should get the best of you because they're paying you money. And then other things that don't need to be done by you, email scheduling, podcast editing, things like this, like low level $10 an hour tasks don't need to be done by you. And there you get energy back. It's like Josh, my husband, not for you, just for anyone watching. You're like, oh, really, Josh is your husband. But Josh talked about it as like, as your life, your. Excuse me, like your life meter in Super Mario. You know how you like lose lives and if you're doing too much as an entrepreneur, like cuts down your lives, like there are certain. And then you have to go get more lives. But the way you get more lives is by handing things off or only focusing on the things that move the needle for you. Yeah. And then releasing the things that do not move the needle or other people can do that allows you to have just a more leveraged stance. And he talks about this a lot because he was at an event where Mike Michalowicz spoke, and he was saying, like, so many of us get trapped in the cycle of wanting to be the CEO. Like, ooh, ah, I'm the CEO. And he's like, how many CEOs do you know who work like crazy or who are still energies after miserable? It's not about being the CEO. It's about being the shareholder. Allowing your business to run for you, allowing it to make money for you. You kind of like sitting back, doing your thing, having an easier lifestyle, more time, so you can make better decisions and still get paid. So it's about that critical shift of not needing to do everything and empowering people to take it off your plate and allowing them to make mistakes so that they can get better, so that they can learn what not to do and therefore what to do and how to do it even better.

I love it, Jill. Thank you and thank you. I'm sure everyone has just loved having you in their ears, understands my deep love affair with you now. You're amazing. All of your information is straight under the bottom, but I would say, like, hit you up on Instagram, but you're kind of avoiding it a little bit, which is another boundary thing, which I love.

For a long time, I was like, I need to do social media. I need to do social media. And then I was like, like, do I? Do I really? If it's not a needle mover, which is not for us, do I need to do it? The answer is no. So I have it, and I talk to people in DMs, and sometimes I do stories. Like, I documented my whole hurricane experience. But, yeah, like, you can DM me for sure. It's gonna take a few days to respond.

I'll take you a while, but I'll say hi. Thank you, Jill.

Thanks T.